CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
WE KNEW YE WELL…
Valmont glared out at everyone on the front lawn. All denizens of the home had gathered. All the demons, Sandi, Drago and his posse, Hao and the Enforcers…all of them were being looked at with utter ferocity by the blond-haired Englishman. A vein was popping out on his neck as he raised his eyebrow and spoke one thing:
"Who is responsible for this." He demanded.
They all looked at the horrible, twisted, flooded wreckage of the house that had once been Valmont Manor. It was ruined.
"WELL!?!" Valmont shouted.
Sandi rubbed the back of her neck. "Well…er…I guess it all, like, started when we were downstairs and stuff, playing DDR at around 10…"
Sandi and several others had been playing downstairs. Nick finished up "Burning Heat" with a mighty jump in the air, his one foot landing down on the last arrow. His melodramatic style was captivating to the eye, and even though he occasionally missed a few, he still was having a great time with the others.
"Okay, okay, who's next?" Sandi asked. "Who's gonna strut their stuff?"
She was practically glowing. Why?
LAST NIGHT:
"Like wow." She said, holding onto Shendu as they lay in Sandi's bed, looking into each other's eyes.
"Like wow?" Shendu repeated.
"Totally." She said, kissing him on his snout. He smiled.
BACK TO THE BASEMENT
Drago stepped forward. "It's my turn to give it a try. I think I'll do…uh…Butterfly."
Silence. Then…
"Butterfly?"
"Butterfly."
They all started snickering and/or laughing, except for Nick, who just smiled. "Aw, so you have a soft side after all!" He said.
"Tell anyone I like B4U and I'll eat your dripping hearts." Drago muttered. That made everyone shut up quickly.
"Hey, you should be nicer to us!" Nick said.
"Why should I put up with these dweebs?" Drago demanded to know. "Especially you poser enforcers, you couldn't even-"
"Alright that's it. Let me tell you a real story. Once upon a time there was an annoying lazy guy who never did any work and a hardworking, lovable girl who-"
"Yeah, yeah, I know. The girl got rich and the other guy died a horrible death or something. Blah,blah,blaaaah. Can't you tell something funnier?"
"Hey, I'm trying to teach you a lesson about life values!"
"Storytelling is usually an improper technique to teach examples of real life lessons. I mean, a story is a medium that's based primarily on fiction and stories are primarily chosen for their goals, so while in the story things may go a certain way to prove a point, there's no guarantee that that actually happens in REAL life. And in the story, the narrator is controlling everything, so he can determine how the story ends, thus making storytelling a rather useless method of trying to point out real-life lessons." Sandi explained.
"…uh…er…" Drago mumbled.
"…what was that?" Nick asked.
"WOW. You're smarter than I thought you were." Strikemaster Ice exclaimed.
"HEY!" Sandi shouted. "What's THAT supposed to-"
RIIIING!
Everyone blinked. Someone at the door? Sandi walked upstairs and answered the front door. A portly man in blue overalls with a bright yellow shirt stood there. He hada cap on his head, a huge tool-belt and thick boots to boot! He also had a large mustache that was all spiky and jagged. He had an assistant who had a mustache of a "dastardly" nature, he was very tall and thin, with a hook-like nose. He had dark blue overalls and a purple shirt.
"Uh…can I help you?" Sandi asked.
"We're the Martinet Plumbing Bros. Nice to meetcha, sweetcheeks." The fattest one spoke in a deep, sorta cackling voice.
Sandi looked a bit offended. "Hey, like don't call me "sweetcheeks", lardo!"
"Can we just come in, huh? We gotta job to do, that's what yer dad Valmont paid us for." The other one spoke. He had a high-pitched sort of voice. Sandi shrugged and let them inside. Nick and Drago had also arrived in the main hall and saw them enter. "Now then, could you two fine gentlemen direct us to the where yeh put the boiler?" The tall one asked.
Nick shrugged. "Sure, right this way." He said, leading them to a nearby closet. He opened it up, revealing a stairway down to the boiler room. "Right in here. Down there's where all the plumbing goes and stuff." Nick said. They nodded and walked on down. Then, at that moment…
"Guys! Guys!"
They all looked up and saw Hsi sliding down the banister. He leapt off of it at the very end, landing deftly on his feet. He had a newspaper in his hand. "The Super Lotto Jackpot is up to 100 million dollars!" He exclaimed. "And Xiao bought me twenty tickets for us to split! I'm gonna be rich! RICH!"
"What are you gonna do with 100 million dollars?" Nick asked.
WHAT HE WOULD DO:
"Oh, I can't believe that you two are gonna have a KID!" Nick exclaimed to Hsi in the backyard of the mansion. "Jade must be so happy! Is it a boy or a girl?"
"Both…and we're both feeling great about this!" Hsi admitted. "I can't believe she really said yes to me on that day…it all seems so far away from now…almost unreal…but it happened, and it was beautiful…"
"Well she absolutely loved your gift." Nick admitted. "Diamonds are forever!"
Jade held up a diamond the size of a small dog up. She was wearing it around her neck. "Too much bling?" She asked Drago and his posse, who shook their heads and gave her a thumbs-up each.
PRESENT:
"Oh, I'd find something." Hsi told them.
"I wonder what Xiao would do…" Nick wondered.
WHAT XIAO WOULD DO:
"Well Mr. Xiao…" A white-haired man handed Xiao the keys to a very big mansion with a HUGE and impressively beautiful estate. There was a pool, tennis courts, a petting zoo (and cemetery), an aviary, a wishing-well…even a waterfall! "It's all yours!" He then nodded and left, walking out the front gate.
Xiao turned and looked at the mansion. Out from the front door came several dozen lovelies who were wearing next to nothing, along with some sexy-looking menservants. Xiao grinned. "All riiiight!" He exclaimed, going into the zoo with them all, punching the air over and over. "It's goin' down!"
Shot pans out to the front gate of the mansion's driveway. On the front gate are the words "Playboy Mansion".
PRESENT:
"…er…than again…"
"Perhaps we'd better not ask. Anyway, Xiao's at the hospital with Bai. He's training her to be a nurse."
Drago raised an eyebrow. "My aunt, a NURSE?"
"Yeah. She said she wanted to try her hand at making people feel better."
MEANWHILE…AT THE HOSPITAL…
"Well I sure feel a LOT better!" The man remarked after Bai Tsa and he left the supply closet. "Thanks." He told Bai, who winked and smiled.
"No problem Mr. Foster. Now you'd better go back and check up on your son in the ICU." She waved goodbye to the handsome man just as Xiao approached with Nurse Sky Dog right behind.
"Bai-Michelle, what are you DOING!?!"
"What? I was treating his kid and he said he was feeling lonely because "Millie isn't with me". Apparently Millie was his wife. And I felt he was lonely like I was, so we started talking about the things our significant others used to do."
"Like what?" Nurse Sky Dog asked, crossing his arms.
"Well, Hwang liked to paint pictures of me in the nude…and he also liked swimming with me. He REALLY liked home-cooking too. And when I mentioned swimming, Mr. Foster said that he LOVED swimming, that he'd been a swimming champ in, uh, "Middle Rock High School" I believe. So before you know it…"
She then licked her lips. "Woo! He was AMAZING. I know I shouldn't be doing tongues before ten, but…wow!"
"Corey, tell your sister to keep her legs together. And do it with THIS face." Nurse Sky Dog pointed at his face and gave his fiercest, harshest Native American glare. He then left. "Corey" shook his head. "Sister, what do we keep telling you? Keep it under control! I thought you'd changed!"
"I have! This feels different! We're really connecting! Yeah sure, he has a son…"
"And a wife who's visiting TODAY."
Bai Tsa went pale. "Wh-what? But he said…"
"His wife wasn't with him because she was at a meeting of her chorus club. They're on their way here to sing for her son!" Xiao moaned. He shoved his snazzy metal clipboard in her face. "Look, I wrote it down from the schedule!"
Bai looked it over. She gaped. "Oh f—k! I recognize the last names of like…a dozen of these women in the chorus club!"
Xiao raised an eyebrow. "How?"
"Because-"
Suddenly a piercing, horrible shriek erupted from the end of the hallway. "YOU WHOOOOOOORE!!!"
Bai Tsa bolted as a dozen women ran after her, screaming at her and swearing to "gut the whore" for sleeping with their husbands. Xiao ran after them, yelling "wait, wait, no running in the hospital!"
MEANWHILE…
Po Kong's stomach grumbled. "…I'm hungry." She remarked. "I'm gonna get something to eat. I feel like a triple-decker burger." She left the basement for the kitchen, opening up the huge fridge, only to find…
"DISGUSTING!" She yelled. Hao had followed her, in the mood for a beer. He was talking on his cell phone.
"Oh, "Tony", "Tony", what am I gonna do with you? I told you, I sent over that package. Yeah, yeah, sure thing "Redgrave". I'll be glad to see you later on, okay? Give Trish and Lucia a hug for me, actually give Trish a kiss, she's one hot-well sheesh, no need to go below the belt, PU$$Y. I mean come on! Oh wait…Mary's there? Oops, uh…okay, tell them it was just a joke. I don't want her to blow me up."
Hao looked the contents of the fridge over.
"Hmm…Valmont needs to clear out his fridge."
"Helloooooo? TMI! And the leftovers are NOT that old!" Sandi defended, walking in.
"There is an arrowhead in the guacamole."
"Oh come ON!"
"The peach cobbler's got green fuzz."
Sandi rolled her eyes. "PFFT!"
Po Kong suddenly leapt back, shrieking. Sandi tossed her a look. "What?"
"The Shepherd's Pie growled at me!"
Sandi moaned, slapping her forehead. "Fine. I'll like, clean out the fridge, GAWD!"
She walked over to the sink and kneeled down, opening up the cabinet. "Guys, get in here and help me out!" She called out. The Enforcers immediately bolted into the room, saluting. "Like, at ease. Come on, let's totally go to town on the leftovers!" She handed them each a sponge and paper towels, and then got out a huge bucket. She turned on the water…
Nothing. Hmm.
"Oh, right! The plumbers are still downstairs. Well, you'll just have to wait for us to finish cleaning before you can eat anything, Po." Sandi told Po Kong.
Po Kong groaned. "No way! I REFUSE to wait to eat! I'm going out!" She promptly stomped off, grabbing Hao by the ear. "You're driving me to Mickey D's!"
"AAAA!" He yelled. "Help meeeee!" Naturally, nobody listened.
Elsewhere in the house…
Not everyone had been playing DDR. Tso was taking off his clothes as he emerged slowly from his bed, yawning and in demon form. To fit into the shower, he took his human form and entered carefully, a single white towel wrapped around his waist. He tried to turn the water on…nothing. Hmm.
"Odd." He remarked.
In the room next to it, Dai Gui had a bathroom in his room. He was groaning horribly inside. "Ohhhhh…oh mother, OHHHH…" He'd eaten too much junk food last night…he was sure that those fried clam strips had done the most damage. He held his stomach as he rocked back and forth in front of the toilet. Oh, the pain!
Finally it happened. A tango with the toilet. Worshipping the porcelain god. A multicolor yawn. He let out a "gau-guuh", got on his knees in front of the toilet and…insert your favorite term for "puking" here.
Drago shrugged his shoulders downstairs. "Well, I'm off. I've got…things to take care of. Come on, home-boys. Let's bounce."
His posse left with him out the front door. Shendu left as well, not bothering to say where he was going. Nick scratched his head as he and the Sky Demon watched them leave. "Now where do you think THEY'RE going?" He asked.
AS IT WERE:
RIIIIING!
Jade answered the door of the antiques shop. Jackie and Uncle were at an antique fair, and Tohru was in the kitchen, making lunch for Jade. He was trying to use magic to do it, and was succeeding very well, it was like something from out of "The Sword in the Stone". With a few waves of his newt and some chants, a nice little two-course meal had been set up on the kitchen table, all the plates and silverware down…and the spell had even folded the napkin into a little bow. Shin, as it were, was staying with the Chans. Naturally, this drove Uncle insane to no end.
Tohru however, quickly found that Shin was of great use. He even knew Japanese spells for getting rid of household pests.
Although this HAD backfired.
HOW:
"All right." Shin said, raising his hands and putting them together. "Nukeru, He Men Jaaku, Nukeru He Men Jaaku…"
Instantly a "BANG" resulted from the mousehole, and many mice scurried out, running out of it, out of the kitchen, right out of the antiques store as Tohru opened the door for them. "Phew. That takes care of our mice problem."
BEEP-BEEP!
Suddenly a motorcycle swerved to avoid hitting the mice. He fell off the cycle, which flew into the window of the antiques store.
"Oh dear." Shin remarked.
PRESENT:
As for the front door, well…
There, beaming in a charming fashion, was Drago with his posse. "Hey, babe." He remarked, smiling broadly. "Cutie's here!"
"…what do you want?" Jade wanted to know.
"I told you, I'm a good guy now. I just want to have some fun, hang out with you a little. Nothing else." Drago insisted.
Jade looked him over. Those eyes…so deeply entrancing…
"All right." She let him in. "Tohru! We've got company! "Big D" and his friends." She snickered at that last bit.
Tohru groaned. "Oh, not them…" But he began spellcasting again.
Jade turned to the others. "Anyhow, while he's working on that…" She jabbed her thumb at a huge, old poker table near the corner. "Wanna play poker?" She asked.
Drago grinned. "Sure. But I should warn you Jade…I won't go easy on you."
"That's alright. But you might ME to go easy on YOU."
"Why?
"We're playing strip poker."
A crash of plates could be heard from the kitchen along with a deep and loud "AAAIIIAAAHHHH".
DOWN THE STREET…
Shendu entered the store and went up to the counter. "Excuse me." He asked the man behind it. "I'd…I'd like to know where the uh…the…"
"Condoms?"
"No, no, we've got those."
"The other thing?"
"No, the other, OTHER thing."
"Oh, oh. Aisle Six."
Shendu walked through Aisle Six, looking at the various boxes. Which one, which one?
Eventually, the plumbers left the basement. "Well, it's all set. We got 'er done." The fat one spoke, tugging on his cap. "Now me and my bro gotta get goin'. We'll send yer dad the bill."
They left, and as they did, Nick and the Sky Demon gasped at the HUGE plumber's crack that the fat one had. "EWWWWW!!!" Nick screamed. "GROSS!" He ran down into the boiler room.
"I'm…going to wash out my eyes with the hose…and some strong soap." Hsi said, walking into the hall closet and pulling out some anti-septic before walking out the door to go to the outdoor hose. And at the moment that he turned IT on…
"Okay, they should be done. Let's get started." Sandi said, turning the kitchen sink on to fill the bucket up.
Upstairs…
"Will this shower not turn on!?!" Tso growled, wrenching the handle one more time.
"Finally…done…" Dai moaned, pulling down the handle on the toilet to flush.
DOWNSTAIRS, IN THE BASEMENT…
"Ah, finally. A moment to myself." King said, going over to a nearby water cooler and pulling down the "hot" tab to pour himself some green tea.
KA-FWOOOOOOOSH!
Water erupted from the walls of every bathroom, shooting out from the hose and striking Hsi, sending him flying through the air and into a neighbor's property. The force of the shock reverted him into demon form, and he found himself in a Jacuzzi. "Ooh! Nice!" He remarked. Then he realized there were two people in it, looking at him.
"AAA! GIANT BAT!"
Hsi was promptly dunked under the water by the protective husband over and over as his arms flailed wildly. And speaking of flailing wildly, King was being drenched by water as he desperately tried to stop the water with his magic, only he couldn't get a single spell out. Finally he bolted for the door, only to find that the stairs had been washed away…
"Oh dear." He groaned.
Meanwhile, Bai Tsa had run for her life through the hospital parking lot, desperate to get away. However, just before she could reach the bus stop…
BLAM! A car suddenly slammed into her from the side, reducing her to a puddle. The crowd of angry women chorus members who had been chasing her watched as a tentacle Medusa-style water demon emerged from the puddle, groaning in pain as the guy who'd driven the car into her bolted. She saw them looking at her and gulped.
"Look, I…I made mistakes. I was lonely because…because I'd lost my one true love to death a long time ago. So…I devoted myself to one-night stands to fill the gap somehow. But I swear Mrs. Foster, I didn't…uh…I think it's "tongue-bang" with your husband because of that. I realized recently that my old love would have wanted me to find someone to care for me, and that's why I hit it off with your husband…because he seemed so much like me. Besides, he said you "were no longer with us", so it's a simple misunderstanding. The best thing we can do now…" She spread out her arms. "Is to just walk away with our dignity intact…right?'
The chorus members were silent. Then Millie spoke.
"Do you know what I do to whores?"
Bai's eyes went wide. From behind the chorus of women, Xiao gulped.
"I punch them in the face."
Bai cracked her knuckles and made the "come on" gesture. "Then BRING it, BITCH! BRING IT!"
Long story short...they both brought it. And, as evidenced by those who saw a tied-up, duct tape-over-mouth, dangling Bai Tsa who was stuck in a fish net hanging over a restaurant with a sign nearby that said "SEAFOOD SPECIAL TODAY: WHORE"…Millie brought it harder.
ELSEWHERE…
"Ah, at last. McDonalds." Po Kong said as they approached the drive-up order box in Hao's red, white and blue sports car.
"Hi." Hao said. "I'd like six Big Macs, five French fry orders, and four Pepsis."
"Szzz bgg maxxxx, fiv fren frzzz, fur ppp-zzzzs…"
"No, six Big Macs, five French fries, four Pepsis." Hao repeated.
"Szzz bgg maxxxx, fiv fren frzzz, fur ppp-zzzzs…"
"NO! I said, six Big Macs, five French fries and four Pepsis!" Hao shouted.
"Szzz bgg maxxxx, fiv fren frzzz, fur ppp-zzzzs…"
"AAAAARRRRGGHHH! SON OF…ADAM!" Hao shouted, honking the horn. "I want my order, darn it!"
"Sorry, hold on." A different voice from the order box. "Here, tell me your order, sir."
Hao sighed. "I'd like six Big Macs, five French fries and four Pepsis."
"Right. Five tacos and three Chicken nugget orders."
Hao blinked. "I didn't order five tacos and three chicken nuggets. I want six Big Macs, five French fries and four Pepsis, miss!"
"Would you like Ranch Dressing with your salad?"
"I didn't order a salad!" Hao shouted angrily.
"We don't make seafood salads."
Hao's head hit the wheel over and over and over. "I coulda sworn I deserved a break today!" He moaned.
"Your total will be $104.98. Go to the second drive-thru window."
AT THE ANTIQUE'S SHOP…
DJ Fist put down his hand. Then so did MC Cobra. Drago was next, followed Tohru, then by Jade. Only Strikemaster Ice was left. The rules of the game were simple: if you had the worst hand…off with our clothes!
"Okay pepperoni boy, let's see 'em!" Tohru snickered. He was still in most of his clothes, he'd only had to take off his socks and his shoes. Jade had done AMAZINGLY well, she hadn't had to take off anything. Drago had had to take off his shirt, shoes and socks. MC Fist and DJ Cobra had been forced to take off their shoes, socks and shirt as well. But poor Strikemaster Ice had been forced to take off his pants. He was only wearing his underwear right now. Shin had joined in, he'd been forced to take off his shirt. He was pretty good at this game…seeing as he knew when the others were bluffing. (Shh. Don't tell nobody!)
Stirkemaster Ice groaned and put down his hand. Jack diddly.
"AAA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!"
"WOOP!"
"Hee-hee-hee!"
"Okay, come on now, take 'em off." Shin told him.
"But they're company property!" Strikemaster Ice whined.
Tohru pulled out his newt and pointed it in a threatening manner at Strikemaster Ice, who groaned, not wanting to be turned into a toad. He reached down and after fiddling around for a little bit…
WOOOOOOO-OOOP!
Fwip. He tossed a pair of "24 Hour Pizza" underpants onto the table. Tohru began chuckling madly while Jade and Shin commented "Nice". MC Fist and DJ Cobra chuckled too, then stopped when they made eye contact. They then both dove for the underpants, with MC Fist being the one who grabbed them away.
Meanwhile…
"Hmm…" Shendu said, turning the box over and over in his hand. "Simple and Safe, Women's Choice Pregnancy Tests are always accurate". Okay, fine." He brought it back to the counter. "I'll buy it. How much?"
"Oh, hold on." The man at the counter said. "The cash register computer crashed." He looked at his watch. "I've got to wait ten minutes for it to reboot."
Shendu groaned and tapped his foot. He hoped Sandi was having a better time than he was.
"Come on, hurry! Hurry!" Sandi shouted, desperately ramming the front door with the others. They'd pulled King out of the basement, which was now totally flooded. Finally they succeeded, and collapsed on the grass outside just as the house let out a huge groan, and then…moments later…
It was like…well, like nothing they'd ever seen. The whole house exploded slightly, bursting out water everywhere, soaking everyone. Then it flopped to the ground, a sad, washed-up pathetic sight. It was like someone had taken a piece of paper, wadded it up under a faucet, then tossed it to the ground to lie there and dissolve. There were various "clink-clink" sounds coming from it as several bricks fell down onto the grass.
Sandi's mouth was so wide open that you could have fit a bowling ball into it. "My…my hooooouse? Like…no waaaaay!!!" She wailed, grabbing the sides of her head. "NOOOOOO!!!"
As everyone groaned and moaned and complained about being on the front lawn, a car drove up…and it was none other than Valmont. When he saw the wreckage…
"Oh dear." King said, plugging is ears. As Ferris Beuller had said…here's the part where he goes berserk.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!"
And so…
"So after you came, you called everyone else up and we came here."
"So…" Valmont rubbed his temples. "Let me see if I have this right…in the end, when my house started exploding with water…
The magus and the bat were SWIMMING…
(Shot of Hsi being dunked over and over and King doing the doggy paddle in the basement)
The two devoted brothers were in the bathroom…
(Shot of Dai and Tso in their bathrooms, one on the toilet, one angrily turning the handle over and over)
The fatty and the vigilante were stuck in the drive-thru…
(Shot of Po Kong and Hao yelling and screaming at the drive-up box at McDonalds)
The froggy was trying to untie his incapacitated fishy sister…
(Shot of Xiao trying to jump up and grab Bai Tsa's tied-up form in the fishing net)
The new guys were playing strip poker…
(Shot of Drago laughing madly, spinning his shirt around in the air with everyone else, save for Strikemaster Ice who had dove for his pants)
My daughter's demon lover was getting a PREGNANCY TEST…
(Shot of Shendu banging his head on the counter as the guy tried to input in the price to the register and kept pushing the wrong button)
And what was happening to my house? It was falling to pieces right in front of my employees and my daughter!
(Shot of Sandi and the Enforcers watching in horror as jets of water burst forth from the walls all around them. They grab each other and scream.)
…so how did I do!?!" Valmont demanded to know. "Did I get everything!?!"
Everyone looked down at the grass. Then, finally…
"Wait…where on Earth is Nick?" Valmont realized.
Suddenly everyone gasped…Nick had been in the boiler room when…
"NICK!" They all turned to the wreckage and ran to it, throwing chunks of wood and plaster aside, desperately searching. Finally they heard a cry…
"SHORYUKEN!"
And FA-WOOOOSH! His burning with a fiery aura that carried him out of the wreckage and onto the ground, Nick landed on his feet in full martial arts gear. Everyone was amazed.
"How on Earth? I thought his powers were gone!"
King rubbed his chin. "Only the natural powers. His martial arts skills and the enhancements he seems to have received through that garb remain…good, good, he's not out of the game yet. Still…it's a miracle he's alive!"
This was true. Nick dusted himself off and coughed up some plaster. "HAA-HAACK! HAAACK! S-Sorry guys…I was stuck in the boiler room when it happened…and it's a good thing too!"
Everyone looked at him like he was crazy. "Why would you think THAT?!?" Valmont wanted to know.
Nick held up something that he took out of his pocket. It was a small pile of screws and bolts that had been removed from the plumbing. "Those two plumbers were FAKE! They went to town on our boiler!" He said, showing them the evidence. "Plus, I remembered seeing what their van looked like before they took off and before I went down into the boiler…the number on it was fake! That number's supposed to be for the hospital Xiao works at, I know because I've called it so many times to check up on him."
Valmont rubbed his chin. "Working from the assumption that the plumbers were real, there was nothing any of you could have done to stop the plumbing from going out of control!" He told them all. "So I guess that leads us to…those Martinet Bros."
Shendu grinned evilly. "Dead animal on their lawn?"
"No." King said. "Actually, I was thinking of something…ironic…"
HALF AN HOUR LATER, AT THE NEAREST BAR…
"And crowds are now arriving on the scene of a huge explosion that has resulted in the absolute destruction of this house. Apparently the whole place flooded over in minutes, as if, according to it's occupants, the Martinet Bros, "by magic". The Martinet Bros's property, what little is left of it, has been seized by the police force as they are going to stand trial for willful destruction of property and endangerment of-"
The gang all turned to each other and clinked their glasses filled with their respective drinks. "To bad plumbers!"
"And plumbers cracks!" Xiao cackled.
"Uh, maybe not to that."
King suddenly approached them. He had a dark green toothpick in his mouth and moved it to the side as he grinned in a frightening fashion. "Wait, wait, how about a toast to the good old Valmont mansion and all the happy memories it had for us?" He asked.
Everyone looked at him. Sandi groaned. "King, it wasn't our fault!"
King shook his head. "No…because Nick found out the truth. You know as well as I do that if you hadn't gotten lucky then it would have been all of your faults in some way…"
They gang stopped drinking. They looked down at the table or right at King.
"Anyhow…" He gave them all a wry smile. "Have a nice time. I'm going over to Uncle's Rare Finds. Apparently we're all going to be staying there for a LONG time…at least, until Mr. Valmont's house gets rebuilt."
Shendu buried his head in his arms. "CHAAAAAN…"
Nick, watching the whole thing from outside the bar grinned and sipped his root beer. He then walked off, heading for the bus which would take him to the antique's shop, to Jade, to Jackie, to Tohru, to Uncle…to home.
It really WOULD have been all of their faults if not for him and those plumbers, he realized to himself. And he hoped they'd learned something.
BGM: Sad instrumental theme music from "Scrubs"
It's not easy hearing someone say "You screwed up"…especially when it's true.
And when that happens, you have to learn from it. Because if you don't learn from your mistakes…
You could end up losing something very precious.
(Shot of Drago and the posse sitting at a table across from Valmont, who gives them an angry glare and walks off.)
Be it trust…
(Shot of the demons all looking down at the ground, each of them thinking of the mansion, all depressed.)
A place you called home…
(Shot of Sandi hugging Shendu and crying. He holds her gently, comforting her as a picture of her and her dad after in front of the mansion is shown on the table, taken from her wallet. They'd just moved in.)
Or a symbol of good times and happy memories.
Nick is now shown on the roof of the antique's shop. Jade is next to him, looking up at the stars with him.
Or worse…all of those…like I felt.
Ultimately, the only thing you can take with you is hope…
The hope that it won't ever, ever happen again…
Author's Note:
This was a nice little "home front" idea that I had had brewing in my head for a while. After all, you can't be saving the world ALL the time. Also, it's gonna force personalities to clash. Can Jackie and Shendu stand to be within fifteen feet of each other? Will it end in tragedy? Will this work out for the better?...only time can tell. Read and review, folks! Tell me what you think!