Hi guys! So, this chapter is where all the drama begins! You may love me or hate me but I would love to read about your reactions and maybe some other theories you have for the story? Thank you to everyone who's been reading, reviewing and alerting! Enjoy!

Breaking Ranks - Emergence

At three thirty the next day I headed to the gym to warm up for John's and mine sparring session. I dressed in the same clothes as yesterday and tied my hair back from my face and walked to the gym. I got there and opened the door as I walked into the room. I got to the middle of the room when something caught my eye as I jumped and turned. Ronon was sitting on the bench with his security detail in the other corner. He was staring at me as I cleared my throat.

"You scared me," I stated, throwing my towel down onto the ground. I noticed that the sparring mats were still out from the previous day. I looked back to Ronon. "What are you doing here?" I asked him. Ronon's expression didn't change.

"Waiting," he grumbled. I nodded.

"For…?" I questioned him.

"Someone to spar with," he said as I bit my bottom lip. I glanced down at my watch on my wrist, then back at Ronon.

"I'm supposed to be meeting Colonel Sheppard at four, but I have twenty minutes to kill. I'll spar with you," I offered with a shrug, as Ronon's expression still didn't change as he stood and walked over to me. Standing this close to me, I suddenly felt like this was a bad idea. He was extremely tall and buff, I don't think I'd last five minutes with him.

"Sheppard says your good," he said shortly. I felt my eyebrows rise.

"He did, did he?" I said with a chuckle. "I guess we'll see then," I said as I headed for the baton sticks, I chucked two to Ronon as he threw one to the floor. I pressed my lips into a firm line as I took two for myself and twirled them around. "It's hard for me to find challengers around here, so give it your best shot Hulk," I said with a smirk. To my shock I saw his mouth twitch, like he was going to smile or smirk, but it was gone in an instant. I took my defensive position on the mat as I raised them up. It did make me nervous that he was only using one baton, but maybe he was just being cocky…

He was definitely not being cocky.

I could barely keep up with him, I was panting and sweating as I quickly dodged another one of his swings, I went in for a hit but he blocked it as I came spinning around behind him. I hit him on his shoulder as he turned and went to hit me near my face but I managed to block with both sticks. I saw his knee coming up as I sidestepped out of the way, I lunged for him again, and he blocked all my hits as I came swinging for his head. He dodged out of the way and then I felt a sharp pain to my shoulder as I hissed and stepped back as we circled. My back was to the gym door as I heard it open up.

"I thought we were supposed to be sparring today?" I heard John say from behind me. I kept my eyes on Ronon.

"I got here early, so Ronon and I—" I had turned to look over my shoulder at John. I heard Ronon move and then I felt my baton sticks go flying out of my hands as suddenly I was gripped tightly around the throat and slammed into the mat below me. In that split second I had horrible flashbacks of Ford's attack, of being strangled to near death and the beating he had given me. My breath left me as my back slammed into the mat as I could hear my own screams ringing in my ears from my memory and Ford screaming at me.

I panicked, I could see John reaching for his knife and coming towards us to protect me as I shot out with my free arm, socking Ronon dead in the face. His grip slacked as I used my legs to kick him away from me.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" John growled as he crouched down to me. I was breathing harshly, holding my throat as I looked at Ronon in fear. The man was holding his mouth; I could see blood trailing down from a split lip as his gaze rose as he met mine. I could feel my throat tightening, remembering how it felt after Ford had attacked me, I couldn't get the images out of my head, they just kept coming, and I could feel my control slipping. John's hands helped me stand as I moved behind him.

"I wouldn't have hurt her," Ronon said as I glared at him

"Well it didn't fucking look like it," I spat. Ronon didn't say anything. I could still hear my screams ringing in my ears as I flinched, John saw this and I saw the concern on his face. I glared up at Ronon again. "Don't you ever come near me again," I said with malice as I turned and ran out of the room.

I was sat in the mess hall around an hour later; my hair was still wet from the long shower I had taken as I could feel it soaking into my shirt. I used my fork and pushed around my peas on the plate as I stared at it hard. I sighed heavily as I dropped the fork and crossed my arms over my chest. I was thinking about what had happened with Ronon in the gym. I thought I was past this phase, the fear of it happening again. I felt weak, just like I felt after Kolya's attack also. Every time I shut my eyes all I could see was the malicious gaze of Ford as he strangled the life out of me. The way he had thrown me around and dragged me through the base was haunting my memories. I rubbed my forehead as I slumped down further in my chair and glanced out the door at the back of the room. It was dark outside and there weren't many people in here anymore, only one or two eating a late dinner. I knew I should probably go and see Heightmeyer over this but I didn't want to, I didn't want to admit that I was still having nightmares about Ford, that sometimes my mind would go back to that time when he was dragging me through Atlantis and I could feel the pain and fear that I experienced like it was happening all over again.

"Hey, Sumner."

I looked up, surprised to see Nathan Fields standing there, looking down at me. I forced a weak smile.

"Hi," I said to him. He pointed to the chair opposite me.

"Do you mind if I sit?" He asked as I shook my head.

"No, go ahead," I said, motioning for him to take a seat. "You know, you don't have to call me Sumner every time, you can call me Mia," I said to him as I saw him look away bashfully. When he looked back at me, with his dark eyes I could see the feelings he had for me in them. I could tell that he wanted to have some sort of relationship with me; it was like he was crushing on me like a schoolboy. He ran a hand through his sandy blonde hair.

"You know, I've been meaning to come and see you to offer my condolences about Lieutenant Ford. It can't be easy, loosing someone that close to you," he said sincerely as I forced another smile. "You guys were really close, weren't you?" He asked. On the inside I was wondering where this was going but on the outside I smiled and nodded.

"Yeah, we were—still are hopefully," I said to him. Nathan nodded. Suddenly he shot out with his hand as he grasped mine in his as I felt his thumb run over the back of my hand. I was frozen as I continued to stare at his hand holding mine.

"I want you to know, if you ever want to talk about anything, I'm here," he said to me as I finally managed to look him in the eye. Feeling him holding my hand wasn't anything like it was with John, with John I my skin always felt like it was tingling with him, with Nathan, it felt like a warm hand.

"Th-thanks," I stuttered out. I saw Nathan's eyes glance up for a second as his expression changed as he pulled his hand away from mine and stood up straight.

"Colonel," he saluted. I felt my stomach drop to my knees. I didn't even want to turn around, but I did—slowly. "See you around…Mia," I heard Nathan say, but I couldn't even look at him, my gaze was focused on John who had a neutral expression on as he watched Nathan leave. I felt like I had just been caught cheating, when I hadn't even done anything wrong. But at the same time, I hadn't pulled away from Nathan; I had let him hold my hand. John slowly looked at me as I rose from my chair and grabbed my tray.

"He saw how upset I was, and wanted to know if I was ok," I told John as I held the tray between our bodies. Now that Nathan was gone I looked around the mess hall, seeing no one else here with us.

"So you go to Nathan Fields with your problems now?" John muttered with jealousy. I huffed and dumped my tray on the rack.

"No, he came to me, I didn't ask for him to hold my hand, he was being nice," I said to him, facing him again. John had crossed his arms and was looking extremely guarded. "In case you haven't noticed, not many people talk to me anymore after the attack, everyone just avoids me now and I think it's because I've become this guarded and anti-social person or I'm a ticking time bomb waiting to explode. Nathan's the first person to actually come up to me and ask me if I'm ok," I explained to him as I saw his expression soften.

"I ask you," John defended. I rolled my eyes and chuckled.

"I know, but I see you everyday, I'm with you all the time. I'm talking about the people I used to speak to; they all avoid me now. Don't get me wrong I appreciate everything you do for me, I really do…but sometimes I need to talk to other people," I said as I saw an understanding look come over his face.

"Just…if he does it again, put him in his place," he said with a pointed finger as I laughed.

"Of course, trust me, it was just as weird for me as it was for you," I said with a grin.

"Doctor McKay, report to the hangar. Doctor McKay, report to the hangar," I heard Zelenka's voice come over the comms system as John and I shared a look as we both realized that this would be about the transformer system. We headed to the gate room together.

John and I arrive and stand next to Elizabeth as we watch one of the technician's placing a pair of white mice into a glass container as Rodney arrives and walks over to us.

"We've been running simulations all day," Zelenka said to us. "I think I may finally have something. I was able to get the generator to run on a buffer loop which tricks the dart into taking only the power that it needs without overloading," Zelenka explained.

"Mmm, great. Good thinking," Rodney said. "Can we, just, see it?" Rodney said quickly.

"Anxious?" Elizabeth questions Rodney, looking at him. Rodney looks over at her with his jaw clenched.

"Yes," he said. Zelenka goes to his computer.

"Ok, firing," he says as he presses something on his computer. The beam emerges from the machine as it sweeps up the mice as they disappear from the box. "Alright. Life signs holding steady. Now, rematerialization initiated." The beam reappears as we are all waiting on baited breath for this to work. I grimace as I see the mice are back, but they are burnt to a crisp.

"Now I'm no scientist, but those mice used to be a different colour," John states.

"This is never going to end!" Rodney exclaims in devastation, "I'm going to be stuck like this—forever!" I walk over to Rodney and clamp my hand down on his shoulder.

"Cheer up, Rodney, it could've been me you were stuck with," I said, trying to reassure him as he groaned and held his head in his hands.

Rodney leaves in a mood, holding his head, muttering about how he needed to go and get some sleep as I watched Elizabeth leave to go to her office as John follows her. He says something to her that I don't hear as I walk closer to them, catching Elizabeth's reply.

"I'm not sure it's a good idea, John," she says with a conflicted look. I was about to continue after them when suddenly Zelenka walked in front of me, stopping me and taking my attention.

"Mia, I was wondering if you would help me with some of these calculations?" Zelenka asked. I looked from Zelenka up to John and Elizabeth standing on the catwalk, but I could no longer hear them. I looked back at Zelenka and took the tablet he was holding out for me.

"Sure," I said with a sincere smile.

"Rodney's been taken into the infirmary," John told me as he walked into my room the next day. I was reading up on all of my Wraith data once more as I dropped it and stared at him with my mouth parted open in shock.

"What? Why?" I asked, jumping up from the bed.

"He had a seizure, Heightmeyer thinks it's because of Cadman being in there. Right now they're prepping Rodney and Cadman for her letting go of control."

"So she's going to die?" I exclaimed.

"I was hoping you'd figured something out yet?" John asked as I started to pace.

"No! I mean, this is some complex science, way beyond me. I mean, I specialize in artillery and—and war machines and tanks but a Wraith beaming device?" I gripped my hair. "I have to go back and help Zelenka, I can't let Cadman commit suicide," I said as I ran passed John and out of my room, heading to the gate room. I ran through the halls, it was early in the afternoon so a lot of people were out and about; I had to weave between Marine's and scientists alike to get to the gate room in one piece.

I arrived as I saw all the familiar scientists still working hard as I looked around the room for Zelenka but I couldn't see him. I walked up to the female German scientist as I tapped her on the shoulder.

"Is Zelenka here?"

"Nein," she said, turning to me, "he's up with Doctor McKay in ze infirmary," she said as I pulled a face.

"Ok, thanks, have we gotten anywhere with the transformer?" I asked her. She handed me the tablet that she had been working on as I went and took a seat on the nearby chair and started to go over their diagnostics.

"Sumner, you in the gate room?" I heard Rodney's voice in my ear as I frowned in confusion; I hit my radio.

"Rodney? I thought you were dying?"

"I am," He said grumpily. "Look, I thought of a way to fix this, Zelenka and I are on our way but I need you to start removing the gate's control crystal's," he explained to me as I laughed.

"Rodney you are a genius," I said to him. I knew what he was going to do and I felt stupid by not thinking of it before, and I know Rodney isn't going to let Zelenka hear the end of it, as it is so simple.

"I know; I'll be there in five." The line went dead as I quickly ran up to the control room and headed to the D.H.D. I chucked myself underneath it as I pulled open the console and located the crystals as I pulled them out. Once all of them were out I hurried back down just as Rodney and Zelenka arrived. Rodney looked at the crystals as I looked at his attire

"Nice robe," I commented as he sent me a side smirk. He took the crystals from me and handed me a pair of cords.

"Go hook up this to the transformer," he ordered as I hurried over to the chamber and moved around the back of it as I started pull out the cords and began hooking them up.

"Alright! Let's do this!" Rodney called about twenty minutes later as I hopped up from sitting next to him, we had just finished another simulation and it says that everything is supposed to go ok.

"Just because it works in simulation doesn't mean—"

"I would prefer not to suffer a fatal seizure while we wait for you to round up more mice for testing. So, shall we?" Rodney said to Zelenka.

"Plus, if it doesn't work, he's going to die anyway," I muttered to the Czech man.

"I heard that," Rodney called out as I grinned.

"I'm sure it'll work," I called loudly as he made a few adjustments to the dematerializer.

"Don't try to talk me out of this—I may very well listen," Rodney said to thin air, he was talking to Cadman. There was a pause as I went and stood next to the taped out area designated for the beaming. "Well, you're welcome. I can honestly say that the entire experience has been very, um…" It looked like he was fumbling with what to say when I heard running footsteps. John, Elizabeth and Carson appeared, all out of breath as they stared at Rodney in worry. "Ah, about time," Rodney said to them.

"Hold on, Rodney—I thought all the mice died?" John asked him, looking panicked.

"Well, what are we—mice or men, hmm?" Rodney said, not very convincingly.

"Are you sure about this?" Elizabeth asked him.

"Absolutely, yes," Rodney said with a nod. Elizabeth looked over at Zelenka and I as I shrugged and Zelenka raised his hand and shrugged. She turned back to Rodney.

"Ok," she said with a nod.

"Just…give me a second," Rodney said as he took in a deep breath and moved back in to the taped area. "Well, Laura, it's been um…unique," Rodney, said to Cadman. He waited a few seconds. "Good luck to us both, right?" He said.

"Alright," Zelenka says, catching my attention as he motions to the four of us standing by the taped line. "It's ready. I suggest you take a step back," Zelenka said as the four of us moved away in sync.

Zelenka raised his finger to press down on the button to initialize the machine when Rodney suddenly puts his finger in the air and places his hand on his hip in a very feminine gesture. He turns on his heel and marches to Carson; he grabs him by the collar of his lab coat and pulls him to meet him in a kiss. My jaw hits the floor, as I am literally speechless. Elizabeth turns away, embarrassed for Rodney probably as John stares over at them in disbelief. Rodney pulls away.

"Just in case this doesn't work," Rodney says as I snigger to myself. The next second Rodney releases Carson and Rodney gasps in horror. "Oh!" Rodney stumbles back, bowing his head, not meeting any of our gazes as he waves at Zelenka. "Just, just hit it," he says. Zelenka hits the button; Rodney is still covering his face in humiliation as the beam sweeps him up.

"Ok—it's reading as two life signs. Power levels are steady—"

"Get them out of there!" John cuts in as Zelenka nods and hits it again. The beam shines again and Rodney and Cadman appear next to each other standing in the positions they were last in. After a second they both hit the floor unconscious. The five of us hurry to them as Carson checks their pulse.

"Let's get them to the infirmary," he orders as he calls in a medical team.

Elizabeth, Zelenka, John and I were sitting in the infirmary waiting for Rodney and Laura to wake up from their sleep. Laura was the first one to wake, she had grinned at the four of us as Carson came over to her and checked her vitals. Not three minutes later we all saw Rodney moving his head around as he groaned and I saw his eyes lazily open.

"Feeling better?" Laura asks Rodney as he looks to his left, only seeing an empty bed as John and I share a look and smirk.

"Oh no," Rodney groans in disappointment.

"Over here," Laura chimes as Rodney turns and looks at her as she waves at him. Rodney looks relieved that he can see her in her own body and not just hearing her in his head.

"Oh, um…a little less crowded. You?" Rodney mutters.

"Same," Laura says as she stretched out in her bed, "It's nice to have my own body back."

"You are doing superbly well," Carson says to Laura as he finishes checking her vitals.

"Ah, good to hear," Rodney says as Zelenka stands next to him. "Nice work," Rodney says to Zelenka.

"Well, it was your idea," Zelenka says to Rodney.

"Well, of course it was, but you…you were…there," Rodney says as his version of a thank you.

"Lieutenant, way to survive what I think may be my worst nightmare," John says to Laura as she chuckles.

"Thank you, sir."

"Yes, thank you," Rodney says sarcastically to John as John grins at him.

"I imagine you two, might want a moment?" Elizabeth offers them both as Laura and Rodney share a look.

"Actually, ma'am, I think I'd like some time alone," Laura says.

"Same here," Rodney agrees, "It's been a while."

"Alright, release them as soon as you can," Elizabeth says to Carson who nods.

"Aye," he replies. John and Elizabeth turn to walk away as I catch Carson clasping Laura's hand for a split second as I hit John on the arm to get his attention. He looks at what I'm seeing as he smirks down at me as I chuckle and follow him out.

The next week passed uneventfully as we waited for Rodney to be cleared for active duty once more by Carson. During that time I spent reading up on Wraith technology that we had figured out, and helping Zelenka take apart the dart now that we no longer needed it to keep Cadman alive so that we could study it more and hopefully find out some secrets about their technology and race; maybe a weakness that we didn't know about before.

I stepped out of my shower and wrapped the towel around my body as I walked into my room and headed to my dressers and changed into my uniform. Today we had a mission to some new planet, it was going to be Rodney's first mission back from the whole dart incident that he refrained from talking about now and just wanted to keep it hush, hush. John hadn't stayed the night as he had told me that he needed to sort something out with Ronon, apparently he had decided to stay here with us, but that was all John had given me, he hadn't told me what Ronon was going to be doing here, I doubt the giant was going to be sitting in a room all day for the rest of his life. There was something that I was missing here. I sighed heavily as I brushed out the tangles in my hair and tied it up in a ponytail as I shrugged on my jacket and headed out of my room towards the conference room.

When I got there I could hear voices from inside the room and guessed I was the last person to arrive. I stepped inside the door and stopped dead in my tracks, sitting in one of the seats was someone I least expected to see in this room. I felt my jaw tense as I growled, "What the hell is he doing here?"

All heads turned to look over at me as I turned my glare back on Ronon, who was sitting in one of the chairs. John rose slowly from his chair, staring at me as I looked from him to Elizabeth, who was slightly frowning at John.

"You didn't tell her?" Elizabeth asked him as John looked over at her.

"Tell me what?" I barked out, causing John to look back at me. I glanced at Rodney, who was sitting next to Elizabeth and rubbing his neck sheepishly, Teyla was sitting there, stunned into silence. And then I looked to Ronon once more, who was staring at me with an unreadable expression. And then it all clicked.

"I'm taking Ronon to the firing range."

"Why? He obviously doesn't need it."

"Just, uh, showing him around."

"I'm not sure this is a good idea, John."

My gaze went to John once more, he could see from my expression that I had figured it out, Ronon was now on the team, he had taken Ford's spot. I could feel my throat tightening from the hurt, the betrayal and the anger I felt towards both John and Ronon. I couldn't be here, I didn't want to see Ronon, and I didn't want to be around John. This was too much. I looked over at Elizabeth; I could see the sympathy on her face.

"I need to be excused, I'm sorry," I said to her, I saw her head faintly nod as I turned on my heel and walked swiftly from the room. I heard a chair scrape across the floor from back in the room. I hit the stairs as I hurried down them, I could feel a tear roll down my cheek as I hastily wiped it away.

"Major!" I heard John call from above. I stopped and turned, craning my neck up to look at him at the top of the stairs. John looked like he wanted to say something but the look on my face stalled him. When I knew he wasn't going to say anything I took that as my cue to leave as I marched out of the gate room.

I ended up back at my room, I opened up my door and walked in, seeing the unmade bed and the clothes strew around the room, I walked slowly to my bed and sat down on it, sinking into the soft mattress. I held my head in my hands as I took in a deep breath.

How could he do this to me? How could he replace Ford with him! He wasn't even apart of our military, he's only been here a few weeks at most and now he was claiming the team as his own. I was furious, but the furious where I knew if I said anything I'd start crying. Was this his way of saying that Ford was never going to come home? That he's given up on him for good? He's still out there and he needs our help.

My door chimed as I lifted my head, I waited for a long time, hoping that whoever was out there would go away. I thought they had left but I heard the chime once more as I stood up and walked over to the door. I waved my hand over the chime as the door slip open to reveal John standing there. As soon as he saw me he spoke.

"Just let me explain," he said, stepping into my room before I could have the doors shut him out. I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Well you better hurry up, cause I'm having a hard time understanding this," I ground out as I moved into the middle of the room.

"Look," he said softly, "Ronon can be a great asset to our team," John said. I frowned.

"We don't need another team member, we have one who needs our help."

"I know, and we aren't giving up on him," John said as I scoffed.

"Well it sure as hell looks like it!" I bellowed.

"Mia, I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Ronon, I just didn't know how…"

"You had plenty of times to tell me, John. Just admit it, you were glad when Ford left," I snapped at him. John frowned.

"What? Mia no—"

"Don't! You're glad he's gone, everyone's glad that Ford got beamed up into that dart because everyone just assumed that he's dead and he's out of our hair, but he has a family! He's my family and I will not give up until I find him and bring him home!"

"Of course I want him home, Mia."

"Then why replace him with Ronon!" I screamed at him, my voice hoarse as I could feel the tears on my cold cheeks, "You doing that just confirms to me that you think he's not coming back! That I should give up on him, like you've always wanted me to do!"

"No…"

"You don't want him back, because if you did you never would've put Ronon on that team, and if you loved me like you say you do, you would have told me when you first considered it, you would've asked me John! But you didn't!" John looked stunned at my words. But I didn't care, he had gone too far, this was something that was unforgiveable in my eyes.

"Of course I love—"

"Don't even finish that sentence!" I hissed at him, pointing my finger threateningly at him. "If you loved me," I heard my voice quiver; "You never would have done this to me. Now get out," I said darkly. John stepped forwards towards me but I stepped back.

"Mia."

"Get out!" I screeched at him. I saw the pain flash across his face for a split second before it was gone. He continued to stare at me for a few more seconds before he turned and waved his hand over the sensor, letting himself out of my room. Once the doors shut I sunk down to the floor in a pool of my own tears.

I waited until it was dark to venture out of my room, it was around eight at night and the halls were silent as I walked down them. No one was out of their rooms and I couldn't even hear the waves crashing against the city. I reached the gate room as I looked up at Elizabeth's office and saw her sitting at her desk typing on her computer. I took a deep breath as I ascended the stairs and walked through the control room and across the catwalk. I reached her office as I knocked gently on the glass door. Elizabeth looked up from her computer, surprised to see me.

"Mia…" She said as I entered the room. She motioned for me to take the seat as I sat down.

"I wanted to apologize for today, I didn't meant to walk out. I was just surprised to see Ronon there," I told her as Elizabeth waved her hand.

"I understand. I just can't believe Colonel Sheppard didn't mention that he would be joining your team," Elizabeth said with a frown.

"That's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about…" I said, grimacing. Elizabeth seemed more intrigued as she closed her laptop down. She clasped her hands together on top of the laptop. I cleared my throat and folded my hands together neatly in my lap. "I know that Ronon needs a place to stay, and I don't want my reaction today to affect his time here, if I was him and I couldn't go anywhere I'd go mad, so this is why I'm asking you to please reassign me to another team." Elizabeth's jaw dropped. I'm guessing it was the last thing she was expecting to hear come out of my mouth. She looked like she was trying to gather her thoughts.

"If this is because of the accident that you and Ronon had the other week…"

"It's not because of that," I told her, "I got over that a few days after it happened. It's just," I paused for a second, gathering my strength. "I can't be on that team with him, seeing him sit where Ford used to sit, seeing him take his place—"

"Ford's place will never be taken, Mia, you know this don't you?" She tried to reassure me as I nodded.

"I know, but that's what it feels like to me, and I don't want my feelings about Ronon to put the whole team in peril. And with Colonel Sheppard…he betrayed my trust and I don't think I can ever forgive him for this." Elizabeth sat for a full minute without saying anything; I could see that she was thinking hard about this.

"Ok," she said finally. "I'll reassign you to Major Lorne's team, one of his sergeants just got sent back to Earth for personal reasons and is needing another member."

"Immediately, please," I asked her as she nodded. She opened up her laptop and began typing away, making the changes. I bit down on my bottom lip. "Um, there is one other thing," I said hesitantly. Elizabeth glanced over her screen at me. "I think you should make someone else Second in Command. I feel like in my current mind state I can't perform my duties to the extent that I want. Lorne would be better suited for it anyway," I said with a shrug as I could see Elizabeth looking all over my face, hoping I would give something away other then my blank face I was giving her. Maybe she was checking to see if I needed to talk to Heightmeyer again just incase I was going nutso again.

"Are you sure about this?" She asked me. I nodded firmly.

"One hundred percent."

Elizabeth sighed and nodded, "Ok, would you like me to radio Sheppard up here?" She asked me. I shook my head.

"If it's ok with you, I'd like to tell him personally," I watched her face for any indication that she suspected something was up, but all I could see was understanding. I think she thought this was some sort of revenge tactic that I was going to use on him because he didn't tell me about Ronon, make him feel even guiltier then he already did.

"Ok," she said with a nod.

"Thank you, Elizabeth," I said her name to her, "For just…understanding. Not many people do," I said sadly as she tried to smile, it was weak, but I saw it. I think she was more upset about me completely changing everything about me then I was.

My next stop was John's room, and I was a nervous wreck. I couldn't stop fidgeting with my shirt and my heart was thundering in my ears so hard I could barely hear myself think. I felt like I was taking a trip down memory lane, I hadn't felt this nervous since I was walking to John's room before we were together and I confronted him about my feelings and his actions. Now I was coming here for a different reason. I arrived all to quickly at his door, I could see the faint light from his bedside lamp through the mosaic glass as I took a deep breath and waved my hand over the sensor. I waited a few seconds before I watched the door open. I wanted to run away so, so badly, but I knew I couldn't, I had to face him, to tell him what I needed to say.

He looked stunned to see me here so soon, he had recently come out of the shower as I could smell his body wash and I noticed his damp hair.

"Mia," he breathed out.

"Hi," I replied quietly. I clasped my hands together in front of me. "Can I come in?" I asked him timidly as he stepped aside to let me pass. I walked into the room, my gaze shot around his familiar room, seeing his small bed that we would always cuddle up in together. We had so many happy memories in here; I could feel my heart breaking. I turned around to look at him, and his expression told me that he knew why I was here; he could read it off of my own face. "I um—I wanted to tell you in person," I said to him, I cleared my throat, trying to get rid of the lump that I could feel building up. I wanted to look away from his eyes but I couldn't, they drew me in like always. "I've asked Elizabeth to reassign me to Lorne's team," I told him as I saw him frown.

"Why?" He asked. I wanted to smack him for being so idiotic.

"You know why, John," I said firmly, "I can't…be around Ronon and not think about Ford. It hurts too much to know that people are just moving on with their lives. I get that everyone's only known him a year but I've known him since I was three years old. And to see someone else stand where he should be, it's like he's been replaced and Ford can never be replaced in my eyes and it kills me inside knowing that with Ronon being here, I might never get to see him again," I said, holding back my tears, I didn't want to cry anymore.

"We are never going to give up on him," John said determinedly. I shook my head.

"It doesn't matter, John. You did it anyway, you didn't tell me and now this is the consequence," I said to him. "Lorne's now your new Second in Command as well."

"What? Mia, you can't…"

"I have, John. It's already done, Elizabeth has made the changes," I said with a frown as John tried to walk to me. I took a step back. When he didn't try to come near me again I turned on my heel and walked to the door.

"Mia," John said as I continued to have my back to him. I bit my bottom lip as I waited for the question that I knew was coming. "What about us?" he asked me as I felt a single tear fall. I looked over my shoulder at him.

"There is no us," I replied to him. I saw the devastation on his face as it killed me inside to do this. "This is how it should be. I'm sorry, John."

I waved my hand over the sensor as I walked out of John Sheppard's life.

yep.

So this was a pretty heavy chapter, and a lot happened; I don't blame anyone for wanting to throttle me right now but hey, i'm guessing most of you might've seen this coming from miles away. I'd love to hear about your reactions and what you think will be happening later on in the story!

REPLIES

Adela - Well, you guessed correctly, she snapped and it blew up in John's face. Thank you!

MageVicky - Duet has always been one of my favourite episodes ever, Rodney cracks me up every time! Thank you for your support!

Thank you everyone, see you next week.