Blue eyes darted back and forth from the rapid beeping of the crashing heart monitor and the open chest that was on the table. Her hands, encased in the latex gloves, fidgeted at her sides, itching to do – something. Anything. But she was only supposed to be observing in this surgery, per Rachel's orders.

But Dr. Hayden's hands were frantically working on the lungs of the five-year-old on the table, and suddenly, her eyes flickered up to Arizona's and her voice, slightly muffled behind her mask, barked out, "Robbins, get in here!"

More than ready, she stepped up to the open area at the table, looking down. Her heart started beating, this crazy pounding that she'd never experienced before, and she could see where the bleeding was coming from – a tear in the left ventricle. The young boy had come in with a myocardial rupture, and Rachel had been prepared to go into this surgery today, but had been unprepared for the unforeseen problems with his right lung, which she was currently working on.

Luckily, Arizona had studied the surgery for countless hours in the last few days, and her hands moved as though they just knew what to do instinctively. Adrenaline rushed through her, whistling through her veins, as the scrub nurse handed her the cyanoacrylate to press over the area, and she barely registered Rachel's voice, low and calm from next to her, telling her, "Careful. Steady."

Then she took the Teflon patch that had been made especially for the boy, Micah Lachlan, she remembered, and brought it down, pressing gently in just the right spots. And just like that, as the world had quickly zeroed in on what was going on right here, as she pulled her hands away slowly, everything came rushing back.

The monitors had gone back to normal – she hadn't realized when Rachel had finished her lung repair – and she could hear the people around her, breathing, muttering softly. Her eyes were wide as she looked down, into the small chest cavity she'd just had her hands inside, then she looked at her blood covered gloves, before her gaze whipped up to look at Rachel, who's eyes were glinting in a way that revealed she was smiling even without Arizona being able to see the majority of her face under her mask.

Her voice low, she said, "Good job, Dr. Robbins. You just saved this boy's life."

She felt her own mouth shift into a smile, this unbelievable feeling, unlike anything she had ever felt before, slid through her, "Thank you."

Rachel leaned over, observing her work, before nodding in approval, "We're done here. Everything looks great."

Prepared to step back, again, still feeling like she was on cloud nine, Rachel, with the suturing needle already in her hand, looked sideways, "Do you want to close?"

Her mouth fell open, and she was glad no one could see her shock due to the surgical mask, "Really?"

In response, Hayden offered her the needle, and as she took it in her hand, the world changed again, centering in for the remainder of the time, as she concentrated on stitching the skin. It wasn't until, well, she wasn't exactly sure when, later that she stood in the scrub room. She was the last one in there, and as she shut off the sink, water dripping from her hands, she couldn't stop the huge smile that spread over her face, and her feet automatically started dancing in a victory dance she didn't even know she possessed.

Until she turned and came face to face with Chief Tamas, and her movement came to a dead halt, feeling herself flush. The older woman with graying hair eyed her in amusement, "That was incredibly impressive. Not only the way you applied the graft to the rupture, but also your sutures were impeccable. They might have been the best from any intern I've ever seen before."

Any animosity she'd been harboring toward Rachel for sticking her with so much basic level suture work in the last month completely disappeared. Because all that practice had led her to this moment, where the chief of surgery was congratulating her, "Thank you, Chief."

She couldn't believe she'd completely forgotten Chief Tamas had been in the gallery today. Then again, she was kind of glad she'd forgotten, just in case the knowledge would have made her nervous and unable to perform as she'd just done.

The woman crossed her arms and stepped forward, to stand next to her, "Word spreads quickly around her about who to keep an eye out for. And I've heard good things about you."

She was positive that the smile that crossed her face was nearly dopey, but it couldn't be helped, "You have?" and she hated the surprise in her voice. Because she'd assumed that Kate would be getting the word around how talented she was, then again, she thought, giddy, Kate hadn't had her hands inside of a five-year-old's chest, and assisted on repairing a myocardial rupture.

"Yes, from both Dr. Hayden and from Dr. Mason. That's why I decided to observe this surgery today; I like to know what's going on in my hospital and to give recognition where recognition is due. So, keep up the good work," she offered her hand, which Arizona readily took, shaking it with vigor before releasing it.

She managed to hold in her excitement until the door closed behind the chief and she exhaled in a squeal, jumping up and down. That just happened. Yes! Adrenaline was still running through her body and she still felt like she was on a high as she left, heading for the locker room.

A week and a half ago – ten days, to be exact – she'd promised Callie a talk. And since then, they hadn't really had a good time. During the two twelve-hour shifts she'd had off in that time, she spent at least six hours of both of them sleeping, and studying for this surgery for the other times. They'd barely managed a quickie in between both of their schedules during the collective twenty-four hours she'd had off.

But she was off at eight tonight, and would be off until tomorrow at noon, and she no longer had the surgery to study for – because she'd kicked it's butt! – so it was time for the talk. They'd made plans for her to meet Callie at Joe's by eight thirty, and they could get a drink before they went back to Callie's place to talk about the issues they were having.

And she really hated having issues with Callie, she thought with a sigh, opening her locker and pulling out her clothes. But at this current moment, after doing an open heart surgery, she couldn't really feel bad about anything. It was all just too good.

Those feelings slightly changed when she was back in her street clothes and she pulled out her cell phone, her stomach dropping when she noticed that the time was almost eleven at night. How could the surgery have taken that long and she just didn't notice? How was that even possible?

Her eyes darted up to the wall clock, thinking maybe her phone was wrong, but her stomach continued to sink even lower, feeling about level with her knees, when she realized that it was indeed almost eleven. And she'd been supposed to meet Callie three hours ago. And she'd never shown. Without calling or texting.

And there was a missed call from her girlfriend, from eight forty-five. And two text messages inquiring her whereabouts and if everything was okay.

Well. Crap.

"It's a good idea," Callie assured the other woman she was sitting with on her living room couch, "But you just need to try to present it differently. You know? You can't just walk into your thesis adviser and throw down, "Hey this is what I want to do.""

Natalie sighed and toyed with the corner of one of the many papers they had sprawled across the table, "I know, I know." Before she dramatically tossed her head back, resting it on the back of the couch, "Not all of us are as brilliant as you are, Callie!"

Chuckling, she looked at where her own thesis presentation rested, neatly in it's own folder on the corner of the table. They were in the same thesis study group, and out of the six people in their group, Natalie was the only one she'd known prior. And Natalie needed some help properly presenting her ideas, so when she asked Callie for extra help sometimes, she gave it.

Today, Callie had made sure to be out of the library they were meeting in by seven so that she could go back to her apartment and change into white shorts because she knew Arizona enjoyed seeing the contrasting colors. Paired with a dark, short sleeved top that revealed maybe a little too much of her chest, and she'd curled her hair, too.

Because she hadn't seen Arizona in four days, and even then, it had been so brief she barely felt like it was anything. She'd had a thesis meeting then, too, and Arizona had been reading up on a surgery. By the time they were both done hitting the books, they'd fallen asleep. No time for talking or anything else.

But tonight, she had it written in a texting promise from the blonde, that there would be time for both talking and everything else. They were going to have an actual date, for the first time in over a month, even if it was just at Joe's, and they had a lot of stuff to talk about. So they would. First about the problems they'd both been having, just lay everything out on the table, and second to just… talk. They hadn't been able to just talk in too long.

And then they were going to have lots and lots of hot sex. Sex where she was going to show Arizona how much she missed her. Sex where she was going to take Arizona standing up, lying down, from behind, on their knees. Sex that was going to remind Arizona just how much they needed to make them work, because they had the best connection that she was sure two people could have in the entire world.

Even though it had been hard to maintain since their scheduling changes. It was still there. She wanted to remind both herself and her girlfriend of that.

So she'd made sure to leave thesis group early, to look nice for her woman, and to get to Joe's at exactly eight, even though she'd known it would take a little while for Arizona to arrive from the hospital. She'd nursed a glass of red wine while she'd waited, sipping slowly waiting for her girlfriend to arrive. And when it was empty, she'd got a little bad, niggling feeling in the pit of her stomach.

Ignoring the feeling, she got another glass of wine and sat with her phone in front of her, waiting for a word from Arizona, until it was nearly nine o'clock. It wouldn't have taken that long for the blonde to get there from the hospital. At first, she'd been nervous when Arizona wasn't answering her texts, thinking maybe something had happened that was detaining her, the worst scenarios running through her head.

Then she'd called the hospital, and it was confirmed that her girlfriend was assisting in a surgery. Who knew when she would be getting out or leaving the hospital, then? As she'd downed her second glass of wine, drinking the dregs from the bottom of the glass, it had been put down onto the table inadvertently hard.

Inside, the logical part of her mind was telling her not to be angry or upset. But she couldn't help it. She just felt so… frustrated. And annoyed. And – ugh. She'd closed her eyes, rubbing her fingers against them, trying to find any outlet that might make her feel better, and when she'd opened them, there was a pair of blue eyes smiling at her.

Just not the blue eyes she'd wanted to see. Natalie looked at her empty wine glasses, "So, your reason about leaving our thesis discussion early was to drink by yourself at Joe's? I think that's the first sign of a problem."

Sighing loudly, she shook her head, "Nope, I was planning on meeting Arizona here."

The shorter woman at lifted an eyebrow, "Was?"

"Well, do you see her here?" she gestured around them, her voice unintentionally harsh. Trying to swallow the anger welling inside her, because Natalie hadn't done anything wrong or anything to deserve it, she'd bit her lip, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," the other brunette had assured, quickly patting her hand against Callie's arm in comfort, before dropping it back down. She still had on her backpack, the one she'd had at thesis group. Tentatively, she gestured toward the seat across from her, the one that had been intended for Arizona at her small, semi-secluded table, "Do you mind if I sit?"

Brown eyes darted to look down at her phone, which of course had no replies from her girlfriend. Trying not to look as dejected as she felt, she'd shaken her head, "No, go for it."

The two of them had made small talk for a while, as Natalie had ordered a drink and Callie got another glass of wine. They made small talk about how their summers had been, though mostly focusing on Natalie because Callie didn't want to divulge the unsatisfying details of her relationship for the last month, mostly just saying that it had been "good." Which, it had been, before Arizona's residency had started. It had been great.

Then she'd asked for Callie's advice on her thesis presentation to her advisor, which they would both be going through in a little over a week, when classes would start and every fourth year had to have a strong argument for their senior thesis. Seeing that hers was already done – she'd busted her ass to finish it during the past week so that she wouldn't have any distractions during Arizona's time off – and her night was now virtually free of any talking and sex that she'd been planning, she saw no reason to say no.

Which was how they came to be sitting in her apartment at eleven o'clock at night. Her phone had been kept on, full volume, on the table next to her, waiting for something – anything, really – from Arizona, but there was nothing.

"I don't want you to take this the wrong way or anything," Natalie said, drawing her attention back to look at the woman sitting at the opposite end of the couch, legs curled under her, "But you don't seem to be very happy tonight. I mean, not that reading over my thesis really calls for you to be having a great time, but… even when you just laughed, your smile didn't really reach your eyes."

She automatically responded, "I'm fine," because even though she wasn't, she just felt… uncomfortable wasn't quite the word she was searching for, but uneasy talking about her relationship with Arizona with Natalie. Not that the opportunity to do so came up often, but after that night months ago at Joe's – the night of she and Arizona's first date – when Natalie had rather drunkenly told her that she expected their relationship to fail and that when it did, she would be there… yeah, Callie definitely wasn't going to talk about her issues with Arizona right now.

Natalie had, not even a month after that altercation at Joe's had happened, sought her out at a coffee cart and apologized to her for what she'd said. No harm had been done, and Callie had forgiven her. Through the sporadic times they'd seen each other last semester and chatted, Natalie had disclosed that she was starting to date a girl who went to Harvard Law, so the Latina had officially seen that as an appropriate time to see the smaller woman as a sort-of friend.

But still. Changing the subject, she asked, "So, how's that girl you're dating? What was her name again?"

Her hand ran through her hair, bringing it up into a ponytail as a slim shoulder shrugged, "Alicia. And it's fine; we're just having a good time. Nothing really serious." She drew in a deep breath, touching her hand to Callie's shoulder, "Listen, I know we're not exactly friends. But you did me a huge favor tonight, and I consider you a friendly acquaintance-y person," she flashed a quick smile before continuing, "So, if you do want to talk about anything, I'm here."

She looked so sincere, Callie thought, and Natalie was a genuinely nice person; she'd always thought that. Fiddling with the heart pendant on her necklace out of habit, she uncrossed her legs, turning where she sat to face the other woman, "It's just… it's been really hard between me and Arizona since she started working at the hospital." Her stomach tightened as her hand clenched around the necklace, "And I – I miss her."

Before the shorter brunette could say anything in response, the apartment door behind them opened, and the woman in question stepped in through the threshold, her voice ringing out, "Calliope, I am so, so, so sorry. You wouldn't believe –" her words came to a sharp end when she shut the door and looked up, seeing the two women who were sitting on the couch.

Sparkling, ocean deep blue eyes narrowed, and both Callie and Natalie could see the instant shift in mood from feet away. The short, slight brunette jumped up from where she sat, quickly shuffling all of the papers she had spread across the coffee table, with Callie's notes on them, putting them into a haphazard pile, out of order, before stuffing them into her bag, "I didn't realize it was so late. Almost midnight. I should, um, go."

Both the Latina and the blonde watched her retreat to the door, Arizona managing to give her a very, very tight, forced smile that read more like get out than goodbye and Callie calling out, "Bye!"

As Natalie turned shutting the door, she gave a small smile, "Thanks for your help, really! Have a good night."

As the door slammed behind her, Arizona turned to look at her, her eyebrows down low in agitation, "Why was Natalie over here past eleven at night?"

Immediately irritated, she gestured toward the table, "I was helping her with her thesis, obviously. Which wouldn't have happened tonight if you had left the hospital and showed up to Joe's when we agreed that we were going to meet there."

Arizona slid off her messenger bag, dropping it onto one of the stools at the breakfast nook, the questioning irritation in her face melting into a look of sheer excitement as she explained, "Callie, the surgery on the little boy, Micah, that I told you about – I didn't just observe. I had my hands in his chest. I felt his heart beat against my fingers, and I repaired the tear in his ventricle."

Callie closed her eyes tightly, trying to put a tap over her infamous tempter, "And I'm proud of you, believe me. I get it, this is what we're both after as doctors, but… we haven't seen each other in four days, barely even texted in that time, and we had plans tonight because you were off-call. We made plans, because we're in a relationship and we've hardly seen each other at all in a month, and you not only canceled them, but you canceled them without so much as a text to let me know you weren't going to be there!"

The frustration was evident in the blonde voice as she shouted back, "I know, all right? I know I didn't text you, but I didn't do it on purpose! It took a lot longer in the OR than I anticipated and I didn't even realize it was so late until I was already on my way out. And all I wanted after that was to come see you and tell you all about it. But… every time something good happens at the hospital, I always feel torn because I feel like I want to be over the moon about it, but then I can't because I know you're not going to be! And I don't like feeling torn, I just want – I just want everything to be good! I just want to be like we were a few months ago, when everything was good between us and we had no issues and I knew that everything that was good for me was good for you, too!"

Pushing herself to stand up, her hands coming to rest on her hips, she shook her head, "Well, everything isn't like it was a few months ago, because things change. And both of our lives are changing, whether or not we want them to, so we either have to find a way to change together or – or…" she trailed off, because she didn't want to think about the alternative.

Arizona looked just as shaken at the prospect of what was unsaid, "Or what, Calliope?" her voice was barely more than a whisper, her face paled.

But the words break up weren't coming out of her throat, "You know what. And there's a part of me, the doctor part, that wants to hear all about the surgery you did, every gory detail. But the other part of me, the girlfriend part, wants to see you for more than an hour a week. I had this whole night planned for us. Do you think I got dressed up and did my hair for Natalie? Because I didn't," the last sentence came out far snappier than she intended it to.

A pale hand came up to rub at the blonde's forehead, eyes closing, "No, I just…" blue eyes snapped open, quickly, "Move in with me!"

Feeling her heartbeat speed up, surprise taking away from some of her anger and agitation, her mouth hung open for a good thirty seconds before she was able to sputter, "Wh-what?"

Even Arizona looked shocked from her own words, but she swallowed hard, and looked like she was really getting behind the idea, "Move in with me. Then we'll be able to be together for whatever time we're both free, because we'll both be there, and we won't have to fight like this over schedules and–"

"No," the word came tumbling out of her mouth, while her stomach felt so tight she was positive it was going to make her sick, and it just got worse as she saw all semblance of emotion leave the blonde's face, leaving a blank look in it's place, and she walked forward so they were standing face to face before she explained, "We aren't just going to move in together to stop fighting. That's not what moving in with each other should be – it should mean something… better… something more than just trying to end an argument."

Eyes that were already rimmed red with tears flickered to hers before looking down at the ground, and her voice was low, as if she was fighting off more tears, "It is more than that. I want to come home to you, when I get off from the hospital, and I want your stuff with my stuff… and…"

Sighing, unable to maintain her anger when Arizona was crying in front of her, she lifted her hands to cut the blonde's face, catching the few tears that had fallen over on her fingertips, "Arizona, I would love to live with you, too. But, not like this. Not when you're barely ever going to be around. Living in your apartment without you there so often would be like… torture. Like a huge tease at the real thing."

The blonde let out a shuddering breath that hit Callie's skin, warming her, while her shoulders drooped, "I just want… I don't want us to fight anymore. At all. I hate feeling like this."

Wrapping her arms around her girlfriend's slim waist and pulling her into her body, she felt Arizona relax against her. Pressing her lips against the golden hair, she whispered, "I didn't picture our talk tonight in a fight. I don't like fighting with you."

The blonde head shook, nuzzling against her neck, "I don't like fighting with you, either. It makes me feel like I'm going to be sick." Her arms came to wrap around Callie's waist, slowly, tightly. "I know I have stuff to work on, too, but," she cut herself off, leaning her head back to connect her eyes with Callie's, they baby blues darkened to nearly indigo, "I know it sounds stupid and jealous, but please don't have Natalie up here late at night. It's the only thing that… I know that you wouldn't do anything with her, and I don't even think she would try anything with you. But just knowing that you're already with her in your thesis group for longer than you're with me every week drives me crazy. And I know she's dating someone else or whatever, but I hate that she looks at you the same way I do," Arizona finished in a rush.

Even though she had so many things to say in response, like the fact that she hated that Arizona spent so much time with Rachel – who Arizona had actually slept with in the past – and that anything happening between she and Natalie was just not going to happen… she kept her mouth shut. Because Rachel was Arizona's boss, and there was no changing that, and what the blonde was asking of her was so simple, "I promise. But I want you to promise something, too, okay? I know it's hard for you, juggling everything. And I don't want to make it harder. Really, I don't. I just want you to promise me that you're going to leave the hospital when you're not on-call."

Arizona bit her lip, and Callie could see that there was something swimming beneath the surface in her eyes, but within seconds, she nodded, "I will. I promise."

Her hands found their way under the loose shirt Arizona was wearing, splaying on her lower back, "I don't want to make you feel torn. And I feel bad when I get mad at whatever is going on between us due to your residency, because I know it's tough. But lately I've been feeling like… like I'm trying so much harder than you are to keep us together." There, the words were out. She'd managed to say them.

And the hurt that flashed across her girlfriend's face was instantaneous and made her regret her honesty. Even as Arizona's body tightened and tried to pull away, she held on, shaking her head at herself, "I shouldn't have said that. It was stupid."

Giving up her battle of trying to pull away, Arizona lifted her arms from where they banded around her and rested them on Callie's chest, her voice so small as she said, "Is that how you really feel? That – that I don't care about us being together or –" the words seemed to baffle her.

Quickly, she shook her head, and called herself a moron, "No." When her girlfriend avoided her gaze, she dipped her head to force eye contact, saying strongly, "Arizona, no. It's not that I don't think you don't care about us, because I know without a doubt that's not true –"

Now, the blonde did manage to break out of her grip, her anger shining through, "Good, because that's not true, at all. I can't believe you think that. I've been spreading myself so thin, to manage being with you and being an intern, and it's so fucking hard and stressful…" she trailed off, dragging her hands through her own hair, tugging as she fought for some semblance of control over her temper.

"I only said that because I feel like I'm the one who's always waiting around. And last week, when I found you at that bar, I went to the hospital to meet up with you and you had already left. I found out from some other intern where you and Alex were; you didn't even text me. I feel like I'm always the one who's texting you or calling you or making plans for your time off," but once the words were out of her mouth, she felt like an idiot. Because it wasn't about keeping score, and she knew that. "I'm sorry."

Arizona's hands fell to her sides, and she shook her head, "No, I'm sorry. I should have let you know about my surgery running late, or at least texted you right when I got out and realized how late it was."

"Neither of us is perfect," she commented, quietly, "We just didn't really have to face it until all this added life stress."

"Life stress can suck it," Arizona said, her bottom lip sticking out in defiance.

Despite feeling like she wanted to cry and yell still, she couldn't help but laugh. Bringing up her hand, she tucked the soft blonde hair that had become disorderly as she'd drawn her hands through it moment ago, behind her girlfriend's ear.

Arizona sighed, turning her face into the touch, mumbling, "Well, you might not be perfect, but you feel perfect."

Running her thumb over the pale cheek that was slightly pinker than usual with the high emotion running through them, she loved the softness of Arizona's skin under her hands, "You, too."

Giving in, Arizona practically fell forward, landing against Callie, and repeating her earlier motion of putting her arms around the Latina's waist, "Can we just order a pizza and relax now? Even if you are still annoyed at me, I just want to spend time with you before I have to go back to the hospital in… almost eight hours."

Pressing her lips against her forehead, she scratched her fingers down her girlfriend's sides, admitting, "I'm not really annoyed anymore; I'm glad we laid everything out, though. We'll start with little things – I'll keep my promise about Natalie, and you keep yours."

The head resting against her nodded softly, "Okay. Sounds like a deal." She pulled back, biting her lip, slightly, "Do you want to order the pizza while I change? Meet you in your bedroom?"

Before Arizona could take two steps, she snagged her hand, "Uh uh. I'll order the pizza, but while I pick up and organize my thesis papers, you are going to tell me all about the surgery that you rocked on that boy."

The way the blonde's face lit up was beyond priceless, "Yeah?"

Nodding, she led them over to the table with the papers spread out, "Yeah."

Arizona perched herself on the edge of the couch, "It was incredible. You know what it made me start thinking about? What if maybe I went into peds? Wouldn't that be crazy?"

Narrowing her eyes in thought, she imagined scenarios, "Actually, I don't think it would be that crazy. It might be a good fit for you."

Arizona shrugged, grinning, the way her eyes were glazed in just this perfect way, Callie could tell she was just thinking about the surgery from earlier, "Maybe."

As she started getting going, Callie found the story engaging and fascinating, as both the doctor part of her and the girlfriend part of her. She wanted to hold on to that feeling for as long as possible.

Please let me know what you think! I love reading all of your thoughts and opinions about what's going on with the girls, thank you so much. And, as always, thank you for reading.