Hello my beloved readers. Sorry that the last chapter was so short and, well, I just wasn't very pleased with the end result, but it was late and I had a deadline. I am much more excited for you to read this chapter. We get a little bit of Kasper in this one.
-Whovian123
Disclaimer: I do not own Frozen.
I am not entirely sure how I make it to dinner, nor am I sure how I manage the meal. Furthermore how I get from the dining hall to my room with Anna sitting in a chair and wringing her hands is a mystery. I also do not know how I managed to avoid Hanses gaze, and his wrath. I am grateful though, and so very relived, that the only challenge left in the day will be falling asleep, for as difficult as it is to endure the nightmares at least I know that they stand in between breakfast am me.
Anna refuses to leave me, insisting that I am safer if she stays by my side at all times. I do allow myself to feel a certain amount of security. While I am by no means safe, I am at slightly less peril with Anna being as stubborn as she it. So I let her sit in my favorite chair and turn my disused lantern over in her hands.
We both start as knocking sounds at the door. "Oh no, no, no, no." I hear to word drop from Anna's lips. She is right; there is no way whoever is knocking means any good. It cannot be Kristoff, he is otherwise located. It has to be Hans. When the knocking comes again I cannot help but flinch. "Don't let him in." Anna insists as we both wait for the door to be wrenched open, or for the knocker to relent.
"I can hear you." The knocker informs us that we have not been as quiet as we would have liked. It is, in fact, not Hans who seems to be knocking, but Kasper.
Anna's face morphs from worry to confusion. "Who is that?"
I ignore her and dart to the door, opening it and pulling Kasper in, then shutting the door behind him. "What are you doing here?" I ask.
"I could ask the very same thing of you. You keep avoiding me; you wouldn't look at me during lunch and dinner. Did I do something wrong, did he hurt you?" Kasper pulls me in to a tight hug that breathes warmth in to my chest. "I'm worried about you."
"What?" I break from the hug to see a rather confused, and nearly angry, Anna standing in front of her chair, lantern now forgotten on my desk, and mouth open demanding answers. "I'm sorry, who are you and why are you so familiar with my sister?"
Kasper pulls away from me, looking nervous as he takes several steps toward Anna. "Hello. I am Prince Kasper." He offers a handshake which is promptly ignored and left to hang in the air.
"You'll have to forgive me; foreign princes set me on edge." There is a coldness seeping in to Anna voice which worries me. "And you still have yet to tell me why you are so familiar with my sister."
Kasper stumbles through several vowels and then takes several steps towards the wall opposite Anna. I decide it is time to intervene before Kasper faints or Anna Attacks him. "He was a guest; he was here for the wedding, and the engagement party."
"So were the other guests. I don't see any of them knocking on your door."
"Anna. He's fine. He's ok. I promise. You don't have to worry about anything." I try to reassure her. "He's my friend, and I trust him."
Anna relents, returning to her chair and taking the lantern back in her hands to fiddle with. Her gaze follows Kasper as he steps away from the wall and towards me. "Are you ok? Has he done anything?" He asks.
"Nope, I've been keeping her safe." Anna interjects before I can answer myself.
"Anna. He's not Hans." I try to make Anna see that, while she has every right to be wary of strangers, not all strangers are going to try and marry you for your country and then kill to see you weep. She does not take kindly to my claim.
"Elsa, you are my sister, and I am going to protect you from threats know, and unknown." Her voice is rising and I worry that she may do or say something truly awful.
"You are my little sister, and it is my job to protect you, not the other way around."
"I would like to say that I do not consider myself a threat in anyway. Had either of you seen me trying to handle a sword you would be unimpressed." Kaspers offers, his intent to lighten the mood noble, but his voice rather uneasy.
"Not another word out of you!" Anna demands. "I don't trust you yet."
Yet, at least she said yet. I do want her to like Kasper. It seems a silly thing to be worried over, but I know I would be happier if she could bring herself to be friendly, or perhaps less threatening. "Anna, he has been nothing but trustworthy… He knows about Hans, he knows that he hurts me." I add the last part rather quickly. Determined to have each party from informing the other of things that I would rather not have them be informed of.
"I am good at secrets." Kasper offers.
"You told him?" Anna asks her voice close to outrage.
"He figured it out. He saw one of the bruises and it was a lucky guess. I didn't want him to know, but he does. There is nothing I can do to make him forget, and the last time I ran away from a secret being exposed there was an eternal winter. I wanted to avoid that this time around."
"Fair enough." Anna's voice holds a begrudged smile. "It was a whole ordeal last time, trying to get the snow to stop."
We both laugh a little as this. Knowing that Anna's anger is behind her I encourage Kasper to move further in to the room. He is, understandably, a little wary, but does not retreat to the wall when Anna looks up at him. "I'm sorry. It has been a trying set of days am I am in no position to trust people."
Kasper brushes off the apology, insisting that it was only reasonable of Anna to worry and that it was endearing to see sisters that looked out for each other so relentlessly. He eventually comes to settle on the edge of my bed, next to me, as his and Anna's small talk draws to a close.
I suppose it is vaguely unwise of me to trust Kasper so easily. He is a strange man from a strange place, but it is not as if I have offered him land, or any sort of reward, for being here. He comes to me of his own accord and has had to deal with rather unglamorous things, such as burning severed limbs.
"Has Hans done anything? Are you ok?" Kasper asks.
"No, I'm fine. Anna wasn't joking; when I am around people he doesn't try anything." I explain.
Kasper nods. There isn't much more too say. Hans is crazy, we all know that. I don't even want to think about what he would do to me if my son proves to be a daughter instead. He might spare my life and give me another chance to 'get it right' but it would be at the cost of her life. I know that no matter whom the father may be I would die for my child.
We chat, it is nervous chatting at first, but soon enough we are smiling real smiles no longer just for the comfort of feigning joy. We are happy in spite of the world crashing around us. I suppose Kaspers world in not falling apart in the true sense that mine and Anna's is, he can leave when the winter breaks. As the ice melts he will sail away and return to his home with strange now stories of our confusing customs and confused monarchy. I know that I will miss him.
In spite of myself, and Anna's dedication to keeping me sane, I have found myself quite fond of Kasper and the way his chest feels as a bury my head away from the world. I do not know what it is that he possesses, but he offers warmth that does not scare me away. Both he and Anna make me feel safe, and together they make me feel as if life is good.
I do not know why I want to keep the existence of my son from Kasper. It is clear to me why Anna must not be told of our mother and father, but I do not understand why Kasper finding out about me carrying Hanses child makes me nervous. Logically it should mean nothing to him; it should mean less than it does to Anna. He will not have any ties to it, just as he does not have any ties to me.
I know that I do not want the winter to end. I do not want Kasper to leave. It is strange and frightening to feel attached to someone who I know will leave me. He has to leave. Hans would not stand for the presence of a prince he knows I have grown fond of. Hans has had no trouble displaying just how far he will go in punishing Kasper. I cannot risk Kasper staying here.
"Elsa?" Anna's voice breaks through my thoughts. "Elsa? Did you hear me? Have you been staring out the window this whole time?"
I clear my throat. "Not the whole time."
Anna rolls her eyes, Kasper chuckles, and I smile. It cannot be understated how great it feels to be able to smile without it being a show. I am smiling, and it is for me, it is because I am happy, not because I have to keep guests happy.
I return my gaze to the window, now actually looking though it as opposed to musing. There is no rain, and the light of day has faded. The stars are popping out through the dark of the sky. I can see the white coated mountains if I strain my eyes; they blend with the night, but are not truly invisible. They represent a sanctuary of sorts, for though I may have panicked, and nearly been killed, while I hid among them, they still gave me a sense of self that I had fought against for so long.
My body shivers. It is not a true shiver born out of cold. It is the cause of worry and the feeling of ones grave being walked over. I am happy now. I cannot remain so forever. Hans will come as he does, and I will have to face him at some point. The presence of Anna and Kasper will not keep him a bay forever.
I do feel stronger now. I have yet another life hanging in my, grievously ill-equipped, hands. I am horribly motivated to outwit Hans, to find a way in which I can win. There is no answer that I have stumbled across, but I am still ruthlessly determined to win somehow. I will find a way.
"No. There is a summer, it's just rather short and never truly melts away all of the frost. The lakes, river, and ocean clear of ice, but the window is brief. Not many people come, and fewer people have places to go." Kasper is telling Anna about his home. "There is no reason to leave though. The mountains are jagged and rich; the plains are softened with snow. In the winter everything is so blue, the snow and the ice take over color and replace the richest of reds with blues."
"What about in the summer?" Anna asks.
"When the snow does melt the grass is ambitious. It sprouts up in tuffs and brings hundreds of tiny delicate flowers with it. The trees are as strong and proud as they were when coated with snow, they do not lose their leaves. They do not even have leafs. The only trees that dare grow close to us are the type with slim green needles." Kaspers voice melts away as he remembers the finer details of life back home.
"It sounds beautiful." I offer.
"It is. It can make you feel so small and so big all at once."
"Can we visit?" Anna asks. "When this has been sorted out, can we come see it? I can't imagine what it must be like in person."
Kasper nods.
I yawn.
"I sorry. It's not what you were- Your home sounds amazing- I promise it wasn't... You are very interesting." I stumble through explanations, searching for the words to explain that I am truly tired and that my yawn was no remark on his story telling.
He laughs. "Don't mention it your majesty. I only hope you forgive the most grievous crime of keeping you up far beyond what must be the norm for a queen." With that he stands and bows out of the room, catching my eyes and smiling a broad, soulful smile.
I smile back. It does feel oh so good to smile. I find that I am still smiling even though the door is closed and Kasper is, presumably, making his way back to his room.
Anna notices my smile and this, in turn, causes an amused smile to grace her face as she turns back to the lantern that she, once again, has in her hands. I raise an eyebrow in question, she looks up to see this and nearly laughs.
"What is it?" I ask.
"It's nothing." She insists with her persistent knowing smile.
"Anna."
"It's rather cute."
"What is?"
"You'll know soon enough."
I do not press for more; I know that all the answers I receive shall be cryptic. Instead I ask another question. "Are you going to wait here all night?"
"Yes."
"Why."
"Because he won't hurt you if I am here, and I promised to keep you safe."
I do not question Anna's logic, and I do not remind her that it ought to be me protecting her. I just pull myself in to my bed and hold the blanket open in offer to Anna. I know that the chair is not a comfortable place to spend the night.
She replaces the lantern on my desk and accepts my offer. It does not take long for her breathing to steady and the occasional light snore to fill the air. I find that I am tired; I also find that I am not afraid to sleep. The world around me fades away as my eyes shut and I step in to the world of dream and nightmares, hoping that, perhaps, tonight I shall stumble only upon the prior.
Anna sure is determind to keep Elsa safe, isn't she. I wonder if that could get her in to trouble later?
I'll have a new chapter out for you on the 16th.
Anyway, Thank you to everyone who reviewed, followed, or favorited.
: Thank you, both for the advice and the complement. I love knowing in which ways I can improve my writing.
Phill: Thank you. Hopefully the wait between chapters never stretches out to much.
Loridhhp: Thank you. Elsa will be giving Hans a good shouting at soon-ish. And there are plenty more hugs to be had for Elsa.
Aggregate Dragon: Thank you. I guess Kristoff might have run in to the mother. But he might not have gotten to talk to her yet.
Yulissab432: Thank you, very much. I shall be awaiting another review most eagerly.