"I don't want to go." Lightning's fingers grazed his chin fondly. "I don't want to leave you."

Fang's face creased sympathetically with shared pain. "Are you sure I can't come with you?"

"It wouldn't matter, even if they let you." Lightning touched his lips and watched them. Her eyes flickered back up to Fang's. "They keep me secluded for two days alone and they don't let anyone watch the tests. I wouldn't be able to see you either way."

Fang's lips jutted and his eyes downturned in the most adorable pout Lightning had ever seen. She was tempted to grab him on the spot and kissing him into oblivion for even possessing such an ability to look the way he did and, as it was, Lightning still felt that warm tickle through her that always possessed her in his presence.

Lightning traced over his lip, eyes lifting up to Fang's again mischievously. "I love it when you pout at me." Lightning scooted closer to him on the bed, lifting her leg over his to twine and play footsie.

"I don't want you to go either." Fang admitted, twisting closer to her. "I'll miss you."

Lightning bent her head and matched their lips, curling up into his hair, which was long enough to almost bury her hand now in its growing length. She kissed him, possessive and longing. Fang cupped her chin and Lightning sighed into his mouth. Fang eagerly took the opportunity to kiss her back with equal fervor. He stroked her chin, impassioned with his love for this beautiful woman.

When Lightning dipped her head under his chin, Fang held her, comforted with Lightning clasped to his body. They breathed quietly and Lightning curled, resting her head on Fang's shoulder. She closed her eyes. "I don't wanna go," Lightning repeated. "Don't make me go, Fang."

Fang hugged her. "Then don't go."

"But I have to…"

"Then go," Fang advised. "And kick their asses to Tuesday so you can come home to me early."

"I'm still gonna miss you."

Fang kissed her forehead and cradled her to him. It would be a long two-day wait for Lightning's return.

XXX

Serah turned in bed. Phantom lips grazed hers as she squirmed. I felt wanted. Imagined ghostly arms encompassed her. Serah tugged the blanket higher on her shoulders. Kiss him like that, Serah.

I didn't mean to hurt her any further. Serah cringed. But the way she kissed me… Serah fretted. She'd known Vanille liked her, of course. The poor girl flirted with her bad enough that even a blind person would see it, but Serah had always figured that past the first failed advance, when Vanille found out she was straight, it'd all just been playful flirting. Even when Vanille had talked to her about the mystery woman at the game who'd kissed her, she hadn't truly believed Vanille still craved her like that. So much… it must have been killing her all this time. She's one of my best friends, and knowing that she'd never be more with me 'cuz I'm… straight.

Am I straight? Serah shivered. Does one kiss make me a lesbian? I was practicing, but… Serah bit her bottom lip, peeping out from the covers. Good thing Claire's not here. She'd never let me hear the end of it if she thought I liked kissing Van.

Ducking her head back under her sister's covers, Serah tried to keep her mind straight. I've never kissed anyone before. It's normal that I'd like it… right? And Vanille's my friend, so it's natural that I'd feel safe and comfortable with her… Serah bit her lip harder at her own inner scoff. I don't know! I've never looked at Vanille and thought… I mean, she's pretty, and I wish I had her boobs, but it's not like I do Claire's thing, where she used to stare off at pretty girls, and now stares off at Fang. I've never dozed thinking of Vanille on me, or getting intimate with her. She had with Snow, though, and that had felt equally delicious in her dreams as the testing experiment of kissing Vanille had been. Uhm…

Think, Serah, think! Serah's lip throbbed a little. I'm in a gay woman's room; time to think like a gay woman- okay. Hypothetically, just imagine in some other world that I'm… gay, like Claire… oh God. Anyway, I kissed Vanille and I liked it, but I haven't ever kissed anyone before. So how am I supposed to be able to tell or not that I really like girls? Snow's freakin' gorgeous to me, and he's not a girl.

Oh- Oh Maker, Serah gripped the sheets. I'm bisexual.

Serah shook herself, having quite enough of this hypothetical other-world place. Returning to current reality, she flopped on the bed and took one of Lightning's pillows to squeeze. What am I gonna do?

XXX

Fang sighed, missing Lightning already when she'd only been gone for but an hour. Getting through the next two days without her was going to be something of a challenge. It'd been quite a while now that Fang had gone without being with Lightning there, with him or just waiting around the bend. He was starting to wonder how he'd lasted all this time without her.

Folding over his laundry, Fang neatly stacked his fresh pile of black T's, silently marveling at the lack of options he had in the shirt category. Black or white, Fang sifted through his white shirts. The only originality that showed from the piles was from his coats. No wonder there. They're all I wore, up until just recent... Fang glanced down at himself, decked in another white T today. Hmm.

Knock, knock, knock! Fang glanced up at the familiar heavy thudding, instinctively knowing who was waiting behind the door before his voice called out to him. "Fang?" When Fang failed to reply, Asael's uncertainty went tentative. He slowly pushed the door open. "...Are you there, Fang?"

Fang's jaw tightened as Asael came into view. "What is it?" Fang growled. "I don't want to talk, if that's why you're here. You've been more than clear with how you need me this way, father."

"Fang," Asael was broken hearted to hear Fang speak to him in such a tone. His boy had never directed such anger at him before. "Please. I just want to apologize."

"Yeah, well, I've heard enough lies from you already." Fang snapped. "Get out."

"Fang-"

"Do you really need me to be a man that bad, Dad?" Fang's voice wavered in his anger to pain. "It disgusts you so much that I look like Mom that you have to quench it, and hide me?" Tears burned his eyes. Fang cursed them. He stood from the piles around him. "That you can't even imagine... caring for me, if I wanted to be a girl?"

"Fang- no," Asael's heart was snapping. "You don't disgust me, Fang. You look just like your mother; how could that ever disgust me?"

"Liar! You hate that I look like her!" Fang's eyes blurred. "Mom died because of me and you loathe that I remind you, like I spite you every day." Fang choked, struggling to regain control of himself. "I saw the way you looked at me. The way you've avoided looking at me since my diagnosis. You might not been disgusted with my resemblance, but you hate that I have it, and you hate it on me. That your precious son might not be all that you expect of him. That I'm not man enough for your love." Fang turned his back on Asael, picking up a stack of shirts. "Just leave me alone."

"It's not like that." Fang ignored him as he set about putting the stack in the closet. "You are my only child, the only good thing of Anya I have left alive." Fang paused at the sound of his mother's name, then returned to work. "I get scared, Fang. I don't want to lose you too, like I did Anya."

"You're doing a hell of a job of it."

"Anya didn't die because of you, Fang." Fang stilled and looked back. "It's not your fault." Asael shook his head. "A lifetime of fighting and stressing her body beyond its limits killed your mother. Anya was injured in the war, and she never fully healed from it. It made unexpected complications when she gave birth to you." Asael sat on the edge of Fang's bed. Fang remained still, standing and watching his dad. "It's why I got so scared, and wanted you to be my boy. After your mother died, I raised you the best I could the only way I knew how. You hadn't started… developing yet. You were my son.

"When you began to grow… different, I didn't know what to do. You were my boy, and I had hopes it would just go away, like you did. I didn't know how to raise a girl, and I'd brought you up a man so you could be strong and invincible. If you'd become a girl, I… I wouldn't know how to protect you. I wouldn't want you to fight; you'd be too fragile. Something could happen to you. Even if it never showed up at first, you'd be susceptible. To injury, to death… "

"No more susceptible than I would be if I wanted to stay a girl, though."

"But you are, Fang," Asael insisted. "Don't you see? I want you to go through with the operation and take the enhancers so you're stronger. You're capable now, Fang, but you're not invincible. You could still get hurt. But after the operation… I wouldn't have to worry of something happening to you ever again."

"Dad…" Fang bit his bottom lip. "…why did you make all the rules? You stopped personal training with me after. You… you changed. We used to go hunting, to spar and train, but after… "

"I knew I had to play hardball after we found out. I never wanted to just leave you, Fang, but I had to press you harder to keep you as strong and independent and good as you were meant to be. It wasn't easy, either. It still isn't. Seeing so much of her in you… it startles me sometimes. When I look at you and I see her; it's… frightening. I raised you as my son, and when I see you, I see her… and her vulnerability beneath the surface of a capable warrior… " Asael sighed, eyes downcast. "I'm not the perfect father, Fang. But I can't let that happen to you too. You're all I have left…"

"Dad…" Fang understood. It was twisted logic, but he could understand his father's thinking process behind it. Anya had died because fighting and injury had led to complications in her pregnancy. He wanted Fang to be the man he'd always believed because, in his mind, he wouldn't be able to get hurt that way. Anya had been a capable fighter, and she'd been hurt and died of it. To Asael, becoming fully male would prevent Fang from sustaining injury or dying in combat. It wasn't exactly straight thinking, but Fang could accept how his dad had come to believe that way. Fang tried subjecting his dad to some reassurance. "I've been okay all these years as I am…"

Asael ran a hand through his hair nervously.

"I haven't decided yet." Fang relented. "I don't know if I want to stay this way or what yet. I… I understand why you did everything, Dad, but… " Fang's eyes darted away skittishly. "If I stayed this way…"

"I would still love you, Fang." Asael filled in. "I admit, I hope it doesn't come to that, but you're still my child. Fang..." Asael sighed. "I know it's my fault, but I know you feel like a man, Fang. I don't want to see you make a lifelong mistake just 'cause you're angry at me or want to please her." Fang bit his lip. "I know you want it too."

"Dad, can you… can you give me a few days? I might want to change. I might not. I still think of myself as a man too right now, but I just… I need a few days, without you pushing me for it. Claire's not here either for a couple days. I just… I gotta figure this out myself. What I really want."

Asael paused a beat. "Okay, Fang." Asael stood. "Thanks for letting me talk to you."

XXX

"I don't know what to do." Serah complained. "I like Snow," she held up her hand before Lebreau could interject. "I know, I know, he's not for me, blah, blah, blah, but I like him! He's nice to me. Vanille's just my friend, but after she kissed me… Lebreau, she wanted me so bad, I could feel how much she craved me."

"Did you want her back?"

"No! I'm straight! I didn't, I swear! But... I didn't not like it, either. I mean, it felt right...but it had to be just 'cuz she kissed well, right? 'Cuz she's experienced. So no! I mean, maybe. I... I don't know. Lebreau!" Serah groaned. "I don't know what to do, Lebreau!"

"Well you're only fourteen, Serah-"

"Why does everyone bring up my age!" Serah hit the table rebelliously. "Just because I'm young, doesn't mean I can't experience everything the way everyone else does! I could fall in love too, you know! Why should it be okay for Claire to dream of Fang, but suddenly weird when I dream of Snow! He's a great guy! Claire just doesn't like him 'cuz he has a dick!" Serah paused. "And male features to go with it!"

Lebreau let her finish the rant and waited a second to see if she had anything else to say. When Serah just glared. Lebreau spoke again. "I was just going to suggest, Serah, that since you're younger and less experienced, maybe you just don't know your sexuality yet."

"Nooo," Serah moaned. "I can't be gay! Do you understand how much leverage that would give Claire, Lebreau? I'd never hear the end of it!"

"Serah, calm down." Lebreau soothed. "Forget what Light would say of you,"

"That's easy for you to say," Serah griped.

"And just think about the kiss." Lebreau continued on over her complaints. "Think about your friend, Vanille, and if you really think it was just a fling or not because you're inexperienced in that category. You can tell whether or not you honestly feel something, Serah."

Serah ran a hand through her hair. "I really don't know," she repeated. "Vanille's my friend. I might be making up something out of nothing just 'cuz I feel bad about her crush on me. Or I might actually… which would be so weird! I've never been attracted to a girl before, Lebreau! Claire used to watch them on the beach passing by when she thought I didn't notice, and I never took up after her. I like scruff, for Eden's sake! I don't know what I should do, if I have feelings or not, and if I do, should I even act on them? Vanille's got it hard for me," at Lebreau's eyebrow, Serah cringed. "Not like that. But she likes me, and I'm just walking in to all this. What if I tried to date her and I didn't like it? Then have to hurt her more… " Serah sighed. "Right when Snow's ready to jump me, too. This couldn't be worsely timed."

"Razz-berry!"

Lebreau and Serah both looked up at the sound of the drunken call. Stars filled Serah's eyes at the sight of her man, while Lebreau sighed indecently. "Here comes Prince Charming."

Serah didn't hear her. Instead, she was focused on Snow, who was rapidly stumbling over their way. "Razz-berry!" Snow called out, almost tripping on his way over. "My Razz-berry!" Snow dropped to his knees in the sand, still just as tall as Serah at that height. "I bin' thinkin' 'bout you, Razz-berry."

"You have?" Serah was flattered. Seeing Lebreau's look, she shook herself lightly to focus.

"M-hmm." Snow nodded drunkenly, then looked around them suddenly. "Is Light here somewhere?"

"Sis went out of town." Snow turned back to her, eyebrows lifting in disbelief. "Snow, I wanted to- "

"No Elder Razz-Berry?" Snow asked excitedly. "She's gone?"

"For two days, yeah." Serah tried to pull him back to the topic at hand. "But Snow, I- "

"Youu are so priddy." Snow complimented. "'erahh, I wanna kiss you. May I?"

Serah flustered. This was exactly what she wanted and had been dreaming of since the first time she saw him, but just at the moment, after discussing Vanille with Lebreau, it didn't feel like the right time… and Snow was drunk. She kinda wanted Snow to be sober the first time their mouths made love in heaven. The big guy had already half-stood from his kneel and was leaning over to her. "Snow, I- you…we..." Serah blushed.

"Lemtt show 'ou." Snow leaned in to kiss…