Disclaimer: I have no rights to the song Blind Prayer which was both written and performed by Rod Stewart.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

"You can't be fucking serious..."

How the hell could women even wear half of this shit? I hadn't been in a mall, let alone a panty shop, since God knows when, but I still figured I should know a damn pair of underwear when I saw one. The stuff I'd found so far wasn't even close, and for being almost nothing but string, all of the prices were jacked up at least double what they were actually worth... if not more.

I'd only been in there for about ten minutes, but I was more than ready to leave by that time. I'd had just about enough of the place and the women that were in there glaring at me, but just when I turned to leave, I nearly ran right into someone.

She was a small girl, even shorter than Claire, and although I'd stopped just short of running into her, she still flinched. When she finally realized that there'd been no impact, though, her entire face went from being incredibly pale to bright red. "I-I'm sorry... I... Can I-I help you at all... s-sir?"

"Yeah, you can tell me how the hell to get out of this damn place," I growled. She winced, but after taking a deep, shaky breath, she steadied herself and tried again.

"If y-you're looking to buy for someone... I-I'd be more than willing to help." I was just about to tell her off when I realized that it wasn't just her voice that was shaking, it was her entire body. It was hard not to notice, though, since she was shivering to the point where even her plaid skirt and oversized sweater were quivering as well. "J-just tell me what size you need... a-and I-I'll do my best to offer some assistance."

What size? Damn if I would know. Every time Claire bought something, she cut the tag off as soon as she came home, and I sure as hell wasn't going to ask her, either.

"I don't know," I admitted with a frustrated sigh. I ran my fingers through my hair as I took a quick glance towards the young women going in and out of the store, but none of them came close to her figure. At least not in the chest...

"C-could you... describe her maybe?" she offered, swallowing hard. She went to tuck her bangs behind her ear, and when she did, the flimsy fabric of her sleeve fell around her elbow. I didn't even think about it before I caught a hold of her wrist, and although she jerked back, that brief moment of contact was all I needed.

"How about you tell me what size you are?" The girl only stared at the floor and continued to blush, but whether it was because I what I did or what I said, I didn't know. Or care if you really want the truth. Still, I figured I should give her at least some explanation since I sure as hell didn't want her to misunderstand me. "I think she's the same size as you."

After all, Claire was the only person I knew with wrists that thin.

"O-of course..." she agreed with a weak nod. "Well... um... do you know what style she would prefer?" More damn questions I didn't have the answer to. Just fucking peachy. "I-if you're not sure... we could always choose a variety. I-I'm sure you'll find something in our selection that... you may like as well."

But it wasn't about me. It was about Claire and what she would like... Sure, I'd see them, too, but I knew she wouldn't wear them unless she was comfortable. When it came to Claire, though, there were a lot of grey areas in that department, and I didn't know exactly what would or wouldn't work for her. The woman only owned seven matching sets, and maybe two extra pairs of panties, to her name, and all of them were the exact same other than maybe the color.

Hoping for another answer from the girl in front of me, I studied her for a moment. She noticed this and quickly looked away, but not before she bit her bottom lip. And with that as my only thing to go on, I knew I had my answer.

"Just pick out something you'd like." The order made her jump at first, her eyes wide with surprise as she turned an even deeper shade of red, but she nodded and turned to scamper off to rummage in the bins. Just before she did, though, I had one last thought for her.

"Make sure it's pink, too."

--

Fifteen minutes later, I found myself sitting in the cab of my truck, smoking a cigarette, and feeling fifty dollars lighter. Not that I really cared about the money since Claire was more than worth it. Besides, for a late birthday present, I still felt like I was being too damn cheap... if not downright selfish. It wasn't like she wouldn't appreciate it, but I knew I'd probably get more out of them in the end than she would.

Glancing at the bright green numbers displayed on the dash, I had another good hour to sit and wait before Claire would be ready to head back. How that woman could take so damn long when it came to buying groceries, I didn't have a clue, but what I did know was it was a pain in the ass for me to sit around and wait like this. At first, I thought I'd just settle in for a quick nap, but just as I was about to lay back in my seat, something caught my eye.

It was across the street, wedged between an adult bookstore and an abandoned bowling alley, but they weren't the reason it was so hard to miss. After all, the neon sign reading 'bar' in big fuck-off letters was more than enough to draw anyone's attention, and it was definitely working.

For me at least.

Still, I did try to ignore it, but I'll be damned if it wasn't near impossible. Even when I closed my eyes, the word burned through the darkness of my mind. I groaned in annoyance, cursing myself for being so desperate. I didn't need a drink... but even though I knew that, I sure as hell felt like I did. It wasn't even like I missed the taste or anything since I'd forgotten that long ago.

Soon enough, though, I found myself across the street and under those bright red letters, but I still hesitated at the door. Not because of what I was about to do but because of the sign hanging in the window. All it said was 'beer,' and as soon as I saw it, I had to wonder whether or not I should just turn back around and wait in the truck like I should've been doing in the first place. Just when I was about to, though, someone called out to me and the voice alone stopped me in my tracks.

"Gray, is that you?" I didn't even get a chance to say anything before I got the wind knocked out of me by a heavy hand catching me on the back of the shoulder. "It's been a while! How've you been, buddy?"

"Owen?" I asked, trying to get my head back together. The man nodded, a wide grin plastered on his chiseled face, and for the first time in a long while, I actually smiled as well. "It really has been a while, hasn't it?"

"Five years," he agreed with a laugh. "Should've known I'd find you here, though."

Well, I could easily say the same damn thing for him. After all, back when I'd seen him last, he'd been the only man I knew of that could drink me under the table and still keep going. I chose to keep my mouth shut, though, if only because it really was good to see him again. It wasn't everyday that I could say that about an old friend, either.

"Let me buy you a drink then... since we're here an' all." I didn't even get a chance to turn him down as he threw open the door and started to push me inside with him. "What's wrong with you? Didn't dry up on me, did you?"

"I'm waiting for someone."

"Well, that works. So am I," he laughed, dragging me along with him to the far end of the bar. He sat us down on a couple of stools, and as soon as he got me there, he started in on me. "Jeez, you're stiff. All those numbers startin' to get to ya?"

"Yeah, laugh it up," I muttered, trying to hide a smug grin of my own, "but I can bet I'm making more than your sorry ass." He really laughed then, giving me another crack on the back, but it trailed off soon enough which told me I was probably right. "How's life back home?"

"Don't really know," he replied. "I haven't been there for a while myself."

"So you're living here now?"

He only shrugged, but when our bartender came up to take care of business, he lit right up again. "Hey, Gray, I'd like you to meet a friend of mine..."

"Come on, Owen. He knows who I am." I gave a start when I heard the voice, but the woman standing behind the counter only laughed. Just one look at her and I knew exactly who I was dealing with. After all, those green eyes of her hers weren't the only thing that hadn't changed... Hell, she was even wearing the same leather vest with the fringe that she had always insisted on wearing back in the day, and it was just about as snug as ever. Not to mention tacky.

"Really, Kathy... can't you let me have some fun with him for once?" From there, the two went on talking, taking more jabs at one another than anything else, and I was left with my own thoughts. Even those were quick to fade, though... right up until I heard my name again.

"What'll you have then, Gray? You feeling like scotch, gin, or vodka tonight?" I flinched.

"You feelin' alright, buddy?" Owen asked, resting a heavy hand on my shoulder. "Cause you sure ain' actin' like it." I just stared straight ahead, frowning as my gaze fell on the bottles lined up right in front of me, but I could still feel their eyes studying me as I sat there arguing with myself. I'd already screwed up once by going back to my old habits, but...

"Vodka," I muttered, laying a wad of bills on the counter. "Keep it straight."

--

By the time I staggered back to the car, it had been just about two whole hours since I'd walked into the bar with my old friend. My smokes were gone, and I wasn't even sure what I had left in my wallet if I had anything left at all. The worst of it, though, was the fact that I'd almost completely forgotten about Claire.

She was curled up in the cab, already having put all of that evening's groceries in the back herself, and when I tried the door, I found she'd locked it on me. I couldn't explain why at the time, but the realization still made me smile.

I tried to keep quiet as I unlocked my door, but she still bolted upright as soon as it clicked. I just chuckled, staring back into her wide blue eyes. "Sorry about leaving you out here like this... I ran into a couple of friends, and-"

"Friends?" she asked curiously, fighting back a yawn. "From where?"

"Back home," I explained as I started the engine. She nodded, but I could tell she was having trouble staying awake just by the way her head continued to droop as well as her eyelids. She was so damn cute, but the poor girl just couldn't see it. "You gonna be alright?"

"Yes... I think so," she assured me as she made herself comfortable again. "I'm sorry if I fall asleep on you, though..." I only rolled my eyes.

"Don't apologize," I told her sharply. "It really doesn't matter to me if you sleep or not." She smiled before giving a yawn, and with that, I put the truck into drive and headed for home. She jostled around at first when I pulled out into the street, but it was clear to me that even by that time she'd long since fallen asleep again.

She looked so peaceful lying there, her hands folded neatly in her lap as her head rested against the window. In the flickering lamp lights along the road, I could just make out her delicate features as she slept on, and from her gently sloping nose to her bow-like lips and even the way her long hair framed her face, everything about her was just so damn beautiful.

I clicked on the radio then, keeping the volume low so not to wake her up, and I smiled to hear an all too familiar voice making its way through my crackling speakers. Taking one last look at my companion to make sure she was sound asleep, I couldn't help but sing along with the man. Just as long as no one else could hear me, of course.

"I lost everything that I ever had. You kicked my name into the dirt."

We breezed through two yellow lights, but as we neared the highway, I slowed her down. After all, I never knew what one of these nut jobs around here would try next, and I wasn't about to let anything happen. Especially not after I'd been drinking.

"I never knew how much love could hurt me. Good God it ain't never come my way before..."

We came to a red light, just off the expressway, and I dipped into my coat pocket to see if maybe I had one last cigarette on me somewhere. The song played on while I did so, but I only caught one line before the light turned green and I took my foot off the break.

"God please don't take her away from me..."

--

I opened my eyes, slowly at first, and as soon as I did, I felt a stab of pain nail itself right through my skull. I cursed, closing my eyes again and bringing my hand up to my forehead. Then I froze.

Was that... blood?

I whipped my head around to the left side of the cab only to find the seat was empty... save for the shards of glass that were scattered across it. At first, I could only stare, but then something made me look down. And thank God I did when I did.

Because there, on the floor, was Claire.

From the way she was laying, her body limp with her arms thrown out in front of her and her hair splayed out around her head and over her face, she looked like a doll that had been tossed there by a child. And just like a doll, she didn't seem to be breathing.

"Claire?" There was no response, but I tried again, only firmer this time. "Claire." Still nothing. "Claire!"

I went to reach for her, but I quickly found I couldn't move. I panicked at first, thinking that maybe the lower half of my body was useless to me now. It was only after struggling for a bit that I realized I was still belted in. As soon as I managed to get myself free, I made it to her side of the car and went to pick her up while trying to be careful of the glass that was sprinkled over her.

Luckily, my door was still in tact, and so it was fairly easy for me to lift her out onto the pavement to have a better look at her. It was only then that I thought I heard her moan. Even so, I was anything but relieved when I brushed back her hair to try and see her face.

"Jesus Christ..."

Even without being a doctor or having a fucking clue when it came to these things, I could tell she was in bad shape. Just above her left eye, there was a deep cut which I could only guess was from the window. That same side of her face had already begun to bruise a dark and ugly color, and even her bottom lip was split, making up for most of the blood. As for the rest of her... I couldn't bring myself to look.

"Sir, are you alright?"

"Do I look like I'm alright, jack ass?" The man stepped back as I glared up at him, but once I realized he was a cop, I looked back down at the woman laying in front of me. "Get us an ambulance... Now."

"There's one on the way," he assured me while crouching down next to Claire and myself on the pavement. He was no older than myself, or maybe even younger, but what aggravated me the most about him being there was the fact he had the fucking nerve to smile at me. "It's going to be alright, sir. We-"

"Like hell it is," I snapped back. "Look at her for Christ's sake!" By that time, I had firm hold on the man's collar, but before he could say a single word back to me, I heard the sirens and dropped him.

From that moment on, everything became nothing but a blur of flashing red, blue, and white. The only thing I could remember in the chaos was Claire being lifted up on a stretcher, her tiny body looking even more so as they went to carry her away. Someone had tried to hold me back, but all it took was a glare and few choice words until I was running after her again. I barely made it in the ambulance before they closed the doors, but I wasn't about to risk leaving her.

Not now...

At first, I couldn't get anywhere near her with the medical staff all hovering around her. Words like 'coma' and 'internal bleeding' flew around me as they made their way into my own thoughts. At one point, though, I saw an opening, and in that moment, I found that her arm had fallen to the side of the gurney.

It was only for an instant, but right then, I reached out for her hand. I held onto it tightly, fighting back the tears as I was reminded of just how small it was compared to my own, but someone walked between us and her arm fell away again. It was then that I felt the first hot tears start to fall, and as I rested my head back on the metal siding, I whispered the only thing that came to mind.

"I'm sorry..."