Blaine parks Bessie carefully in the garage, stopping on his way out to smooth a hand over her hood as he always does. She might only be a car, but he feels as though she understands him, and feels his despondency and pain. He trudges wearily into the house, sighing when he notices Burt's keys and hat are gone. He would have liked his company today.
"Hello Blaine."
"Holy fucking shit!" Blaine screams, when Kurt appears in the kitchen doorway. "Are you trying to kill me?"
"Don't curse. Sorry. I just..."
"Why are you home?"
The defensive stance Blaine has, of his arms folded and jaw jutting out in anger is a long way from the 'going nuts' that Burt had talked about, but Kurt can't blame him one bit.
"I came to take my boyfriend to prom."
"Why do you always do this?" Blaine cries, throwing his hands up in the air. "The first few times, yes, it was a wonderful surprise, and I could forgive you for being moody, but now? You think it's okay to freeze me out, and then reappear like Santa, and that will make it all okay!"
"Actually, it's not like that at all," Kurt says, and his quiet tone makes Blaine listen. "I've been figuring things out in my head, and I've spent most of this afternoon talking to dad."
"You told him the truth?"
"Yes."
"I'm proud of you," Blaine says softly, and he lets his arms drop, walking over to Kurt. "It doesn't make everything okay between us, but I know that took a lot of courage, so well done."
"Blaine...kiss me?"
Blaine kisses him, but it's full of hurt and pain and he keeps it brief, pulling back with a shake of his head.
"Please let me take you to prom?"
"I guess," Blaine shrugs lightly.
"Can we talk first?"
"Not right now, Kurt," Blaine says sadly, as he heads toward the basement stairs. "Let's just get ready."
"No. I mean, yes, I want to, but..."
"I'm not going to bed with you, if that's what you're after."
"It's not! Jesus, Blaine! I'm trying here, and all you're doing is assuming the worst. I want to talk to you before we go, please, if you'll listen."
"I said not right now."
"And I'm saying the opposite," Kurt says firmly, and Blaine knows he won't back down.
"Fine," he huffs, pulling out a chair at the kitchen table. "Talk."
Blaine listens in quiet admiration as Kurt opens up, explaining everything that he told his dad, and his hopes for the future. He holds it together, just, but when he looks up, seconds away from tears, Blaine reaches across to hold his hand.
"All that money you spent on flights," Blaine whispers. "That's all I keep thinking. You were in debt, but you kept flying back and forth."
"You're kind of worth it."
"Did you do it for me, though? Or did you do it to try and escape for a moment, however brief?"
"Both, probably," Kurt admits.
"I'm glad you told your dad everything, and thank you for making me listen when I really didn't want to," Blaine says, letting go of Kurt's hand and folding his own hands neatly in his lap.
"There's a but coming, isn't there?"
"Yeah." Blaine sighs, pushing his thumbs into the corners of his eyes. "I guess it's my turn to be honest with you, right? I feel as though...when I see my future I see it with you. But then, when I look at my present, and you're there, it's so messed up. Since dad died my life has been this roller coaster of emotion. I went through all that hell with mom and Spencer, not to mention his jerk sons. I met Burt, and my whole life changed, and I thought you were my one shot at happiness with someone I love, but that hasn't been the case at all."
"You haven't been happy?"
"I've been happy, of course I have, but it's...it's like everytime I am happy, you freeze me out, and it makes me fearful for what's gonna happen between us in New York. Am I going to head to your apartment one Tuesday after class, only to get there and you won't let me in? Are you going to stand me up if we arrange a date, and then not speak to me for three weeks? Every time you cut me out it has consequences, Kurt, and that consequence is that it chips away at the trust and faith I have in us to be able to make it. To be honest, right now, I'm not sure it's something I want to go through anymore."
Pale, and feeling sick to his stomach, Kurt swallows hard. "What if I promise you I wouldn't do that, though?"
"I don't know if it's enough," Blaine admits sadly. "When I told your dad about your job and apartment, that was a shitty move, and you were angry. I didn't blame you one bit for that, and I was impressed that you told me you needed some time out, but it was a whole week of silence again, then you return and blow up at me when I ask you to prom! It wasn't that the other stuff wasn't important to me, Kurt, it was just that I was trying to cheer you up. You do this all the time, flare up over the smallest thing then cut me out before reappearing and expecting everything to be okay. I don't know if your promise is enough for me, Kurt. I'm so sorry."
"Not as sorry as I am, if I've lost the greatest thing that ever happened to me," Kurt whispers, unable to stop a tear from escaping. "Look, Blaine, can we...can we just have tonight, at least? I'm home for a month now, maybe we can work on things, maybe we can't, but...I just really want to take you to your prom."
"You're home for a month? What about your job?"
"I'm never going to enjoy, or be any good at my job if I'm unhappy with the rest of my life. I went to them with the intention of quitting, to fly home and make this right. They surprised me by giving me a month to work from here instead."
"I see." Blaine sits a moment, trying to digest the fact that Kurt was prepared to give up his dream job to work this out. "Okay. We'll go to prom."
Burt is triumphant, and completely oblivious to both his sons pain, as he lines them up for photo after photo when they're dressed in their elegant tuxedos before kissing them both on the cheek and instructing them to have fun.
Kurt escorts Blaine out to the car, ever the gentleman, and holds Bessie's door open for him. "You look beautiful," he says with a small smile.
"The car, or me?"
"You, doofus," Kurt laughs, and he leans in to kiss Blaine's cheek, surprised when Blaine turns and captures his lips instead. It is only brief, but Kurt notices the spark instantly, and he hopes Blaine has too. They ride to the prom in silence, mainly because Kurt is too nervous to say anything, and Blaine doesn't know what to say. It is only once they are in the gym, with the distraction of other people and the decorations, that they begin to talk once more.
"Why is that moron here?" Kurt asks, as Jackson walks past. "He's not a senior."
"New Directions are performing."
"You're singing?"
Blaine gives a rueful smile as he fills two cups with punch. "No, Kurt. They are, not me. I wasn't gonna come."
"You..."
"You said no, and I had no interest in going with anyone else."
"Not even Jackson?"
Blaine laughs, embarrassed. "Especially not Jackson, though no doubt he would have been quite pleased if I'd asked. Your dad was going to take me out to dinner but I told him not to bother so...yeah, I was expecting an evening at home."
"Oh." Kurt takes his punch, and they stand shoulder to shoulder, surveying the already busy dance floor. He greets Mike, Tina and even Sam, politely when they come over to say hello, but tunes their conversation with Blaine out to mull over his own thoughts instead.
"Kurt?"
"Huh? Sorry?" He turns to see Blaine, looking at him expectantly, but when he notices Kurt hasn't been listening, he rolls his eyes.
"Don't worry about it."
"No, no, it wasn't like that!" Kurt says as the others trail away. "Please, Blaine, I was just..."
"Hey Blaine!"
"Oh you can just fuck off," Kurt snaps at Jackson, who takes a step backward. "You have picked the wrong day to anger me. Stay the hell away from my boyfriend. He's not interested, you're being creepy, now stop!"
"Uh...yeah, Jackson, sorry," Blaine says, taking Kurt by surprise. "Kurt is right. I'm not interested."
"Fine," he huffs, holding his hands up and backing away. "But I'm telling you, I'm a nicer guy than he is."
"Actually, you're not," Blaine says, taking Kurt's hand firmly in his. "He's...he's wonderful."
"Oh," Kurt says, once they're alone again. "That was surprising."
He's hoping for a sudden outpouring of emotion from Blaine, but all he gets is "Hmm, well." Still, the small smile Blaine gives makes it all so much better and he does at least keep ahold of Kurt's hand.
"So...you're not singing tonight, but are you singing at Nationals next week?" Kurt asks awkwardly.
"Might be."
"Solo?"
"Possibly."
"Do I get any hints?"
"No."
"Blaine, I don't want to, but I'm just gonna ask this. Are we breaking up? Are we done?"
Blaine sighs, closing his eyes, and letting his head fall back against the wall for a moment. "I want to say no," is what he eventually comes up with. "I really don't want to break up with you, Kurt, but I just don't know if I can do this. I... I...just don't know."
Kurt nods, swallowing hard as he lets go of Blaine's hand. "I see. Um...can you just...like...gimme five minutes?" It's a question, but he doesn't wait for the answer, pushing through the crowd, with Blaine running after him.
"Kurt! Kurt! Don't do this! Don't walk away again!"
"I'll come back," Kurt says, whirling around on the spot. In the middle of the dance floor he takes Blaine's face tenderly in his hands and kisses his lips. "I'll come back, I swear. Just...give me these five minutes, please."
Blaine doesn't know how long he stands there for, but it is Mike who comes to his rescue with a strong hand on his shoulder as he guides him, not out of the gym, as Blaine would have liked, but just to the side of the crowd where it is at least slightly quieter.
"Blaine, you're one of my closest friends, so I'm just gonna say this. Don't give up on Kurt, or your relationship. Please."
"I don't want to," Blaine cries desperately. "God, I love him so much, this isn't what I want at all, but it just...doesn't work. Like now, he stormed off and I don't even know where he's gone."
"So stay here with me, and listen to the music instead."
Blaine sighs, grateful for Mike's presence. "I thought you were singing with Tina?"
"We're up next. Jackson's first."
"Oh great," Blaine groans with a laugh, as the lights come up on the stage. "That's all I need."
But it's Kurt who walks onto the stage, with a confident air that belies his true terror as he strides toward the microphone. "Hello everyone, hi. My name is Kurt, um...so I'm not in New Directions, I'm not even in high school, but I did used to go here. I'm rambling. For those who were expecting Jackson, whatever, I've taken over. It's just me. Well, Sam, and some piano guy," Kurt says, gesturing to where Sam sits with his guitar, "But we'll ignore them. I'm going to sing now, and this song is for my beautiful Blaine. So listen," he adds, squinting out into the crowd, until he sees him. "Please Blaine, listen to what I'm trying to say."
"Wow. Does Kurt sing?" Mike asks, as he guides Blaine further forward.
"I don't know," Blaine admits. "He used to sing in the show choir, but..." He is cut off as the music starts, and he notices how Kurt looks out into the crowd of students, rather than directly at him. His voice is low to start and Blaine is struck not only by the smooth, subtle and rich tone to it, but also by the lyrics, which seem to have been written for Kurt to sing.
"I tell myself it don't mean a thing,
And what we got, got no hold on me
But when you're not there I just crumble
I tell myself I don't care that much,
But I feel like I die 'til I feel your touch."
This time, Kurt does look at Blaine and the very breath is knocked from him as Kurt's voice soars beautifully into his higher register. The sound is pure, and utterly flawless. The pain and anguish of their situation is etched on Kurt's face as he sings, which only serves to make it more real for Blaine, who gasps and covers his mouth with his hand.
"Only love, only love can hurt like this,
Only love can hurt like this
Must have been a deadly kiss
Only love can hurt like this."
"He..." Blaine says weakly, but he can't manage another word when Kurt makes and holds eye contact, his voice becoming low again for the next verse.
"Say I wouldn't care if you walked away,
But every time you're there I'm begging you to stay,
When you come close I just tremble
And every time, every time you go,
It's like a knife that cuts right through my soul
Only love, only love can hurt like this
Only love can hurt like this,
Must have been a deadly kiss,
Only love can hurt like this,
Only love can hurt like this
Your kisses burn into my skin,
Only love can hurt like this
But it's the sweetest pain,
Burning hot through my veins,
Love is torture makes me more sure.
"He..." Blaine starts again, and he's incredibly grateful for the strong arm Mike puts around his shoulders. He feels as though he could listen to Kurt sing forever, and standing there, in the high school gym, he vows to himself that he will do whatever it takes to make their relationship work.
"Only love can hurt like this,
Your kisses burn into my skin,
Only love can hurt like this,
Only love can hurt like this,
Save me, save me,
Only love, only love,
'Cause only love can hurt like this
And it must have been a deadly kiss."
Blaine stands, in stunned amazement next to Mike, who wipes away a couple of tears as the crowd, who have all stopped dancing to listen to Kurt, cheer wildly.
"I have to go sing," Mike says weakly. "Holy shit, I have to follow that. Blaine, you okay?"
And Blaine turns, blinking, as he emerges from his haze, and smiles brightly. "Yeah," he says, catching sight of Jackson looking dumbstruck. "Yeah, I'm...I'm good."
Kurt arrives in a matter of moments, pink cheeked with exhilaration, yet trying to play it cool. "Told you I'd be back," he says with a smile, one which Blaine shyly returns.
"You...yeah. You did."
"What did you think?" Kurt asks, as Tina and Mike take to the stage and start singing Endless Love.
"It was...yeah, good," Blaine says, and the way he rubs the back of his neck makes Kurt wonder if he secretly knows what that does to him. "You can sing really well."
"Would you like to dance?"
This time Blaine's smile is sure and certain as he takes Kurt's offered arm. "I'd love to."
They barely dance, however, just hold each other close and relish being in one another's arms. Blaine nuzzles in sweetly just above Kurt's collar, sighing happily at the feeling of Kurt's lips grazing over his temple, and that is how they stay for the longest time. They don't really listen to the music, or pay any attention to those around them until they are accidentally bumped by another couple, who hastily apologize.
"They sing well," Kurt says of Tina and Mike, coming out of his daydream, but Blaine wrinkles his nose and shakes his head.
"Not as well as you. I mean, they're my friends, and they're good, but...you're all...you."
Ever so softly, Kurt brings one hand up to Blaine's cheek, caressing his smooth skin and looking into his eyes. "I love you, Blaine," he says quietly, and Blaine realizes his eyes are shining with happiness. "I've loved you for so long, and I'm sorry I get things wrong, and mess stuff up, but I promise to try so hard, if you'll only give me the chance to spend the rest of my life loving you."
Blaine leans in, pressing his face against Kurt's cheek and closing his eyes happily. "I love you too," he whispers, his voice just carrying over the music. "You are everything to me, and I'm never gonna let you go. You don't mess things up though, Kurt. We both get things wrong together, and we have to learn to put them right together too. Neither of us are perfect, but I know we're meant to be, and I know you feel that too. That song was...incredible. Not just because of your amazing vocals, but because those words seem to be all I've been waiting to hear. This is love, I'm sure of it, and yes, it hurts, but it's so worth it."
Kurt wants to reply with something profound, but when Blaine pulls back slightly to look into his eyes again, all he can say is "I love you."
"I love you too."
"That's good then, isn't it?"
Blaine grins, biting his bottom lip. "Very." He lets his hands slide into Kurt's hair as he studies him intently. He notices Kurt's arms moving to circle his waist, under his jacket, keeping him close as their foreheads rest together and for a moment they stay that way, just looking at one another. "You do realize that your declaration has pretty much guaranteed you the best sex of your entire life, right?" Blaine teases, his voice low.
"Absolutely," Kurt says with a small nod. "That's why I said it."
Blaine grins, his lips grazing over Kurt's and sending a jolt through them both. "Thought as much."
Kurt closes the final gap between them, capturing Blaine's lips in a kiss that is full of passion and love. The dam breaks, and their feelings rush forth, with Blaine breathing sharply through his nose and tugging on Kurt's hair, opening his mouth wide and relishing the feel of Kurt's soft, warm lips on his.
Kurt moans loudly, with little or no thought for all the people around them, his one hand splayed firmly on the small of Blaine's back, and the other rubbing over his hip. The first touch of Blaine's tongue against his own has him trying to press his body even closer, because he needs more of Blaine's touch, more of his love.
"It's like a live sex show," Sam comments as he looks on and Mike and Tina, having returned from the stage, have to agree.
"Why don't you ever kiss me like that?" Tina asks Mike, who suddenly becomes very interested in the punch bowl.
Their kiss breaks eventually, though with reluctance on both parts, and Blaine is unable to keep himself from trailing kisses along Kurt's jaw, and down his neck. "Let's go."
"Huh?" Kurt asks, feeling weak and dazed. "Now?"
"Yeah."
"But this is your prom."
"And it's been amazing, but I need more kisses like that, and I think we really need to be alone."
"Oh. Okay," Kurt says, shrugging and taking Blaine's hand in his. "I love you."
Blaine laughs loudly, kissing his lips once more. "Anything to get laid, Hummel. I love you too."