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"Ms. Swan, I apologize. My earlier behavior toward you was unpardonable. Please forgive me," Edward spoke stiffly at her elbow.
Bella froze, her gelato-laden spoon two thirds of the way to her mouth. Her eyes flicked from Esme's thoughtful expression to the carefully blank look on Edward's face.
"I. . . Thank you, Edward." She lowered her spoon back to her bowl. "I know how things must appear on the surface. Maybe we can talk later."
"Maybe." He sat back down beside Esme, his fingers tearing fitfully at a piece of bread.
Maybe? Well, it was a start. "Okay. That's great. And please, call me Bella," she asked, missing the sound of him saying her name.
"I'd rather not," he replied.
"Oh. . . okay," Bella flinched. It felt like a slap. The bowl of her spoon sank into the pool of melting gelato. She wasn't a soldier. No force on earth could have given her the strength to take another bite.
Their waiter appeared again. "Is there anything I can get for you, sir?" he asked Edward.
"No thanks. Once the ladies are finished with their desserts, I think we're done here."
"Excellent. Please, no rush," the man said, producing a black folder with the bill.
Before either woman could react, Edward was handing over his bank card. Bella recognized the card as the same one he had used on their dates. Dates? Could she call them that?
His eyes flicked to hers. She bit her lip and looked down. There was a tiny hill of pulverized breadcrumbs on the table in front of him. Clearing his throat, Edward brushed them into his palm and emptied the mess back into the bread basket.
The waiter returned and handed Edward the black check presenter. He withdrew his card, the receipt and a pen. Bella's eyes were drawn to his hands as Edward signed the receipt, his signature an elegant scrawl. He slipped the card back into his wallet and stood abruptly. "Ladies, I'll be outside whenever you're ready."
Esme snorted under her breath and shook her head. "One extreme or the other," she muttered. If Edward heard her, he gave no indication. Bella shifted uncomfortably in her seat as the woman she had come to admire, appreciate and respect in so short a time eyed her critically.
"I think I'm going to have a cup of coffee. Something to charge me up before we bury ourselves in those contract revisions. I'll see you back at the office."
Bella shook her head in protest. "I really don't think he wants-"
"I love my son, but he's a man. He doesn't know what he wants. Go talk to him. Make him listen. You deserve his respect and patience. Then, when it's his turn, offer him the same thing."
Nodding, Bella wiggled out of the booth and retrieved her coat. This was going to be so uncomfortable. Would he even let her within arm's reach of him?
"Oh, and Bella?"
"Yes, Esme?"
"Iron this out quickly. My curiosity is damn near choking me to death."
Bella cracked a smile and nodded. "I'll try."
Bella approached the restaurant foyer, filled with trepidation. From among the people loitering on the sidewalk, she was able to identify Edward instantly. He had donned a winter overcoat and a lined fedora, but from this angle she could easily recognize the set of his shoulders, the sharp line of his jaw and the curl of auburn hair that barely touched his ears.
She exited the restaurant and came up beside him, burying her hands in her coat pockets. "Your mom decided she wanted a cup of coffee. She said to go ahead without her."
"Ha. Predictable," he mumbled. He turned toward the McCarthy building, and Bella fell into step beside him.
"She was surprised to see you. I think it meant a lot to her. That was a really sweet gesture, dropping in on her like that."
"You think so?"
"Yes. I do. She loves you so much. She's told me how proud she is of you in a hundred different ways. Concealing the truth about me and you felt horrible. I . . . I hated not telling her."
"The truth?"
"That I. . . knew you. That things might be. . . awkward for us working together."
"Awkward. That's fucking precious," he growled, his teeth clenched.
"Edward, please. Stop," she begged, stepping close against the wall and waiting for him to look at her.
He took two more steps before halting. The soles of his shoes scraped the pavement as he turned to face her. Other pedestrians slipped around and between them. His mouth was set in a grim line. He came closer, looking down at her with his shoulder brushing the wall.
"What?" he asked in a clipped tone.
"Edward, I've been trying to tell you that I'm sorry. I even called your number, but your roommate said you weren't home. When I left your apartment last week, I honestly thought I would never see you again. At the time, I believed that was the most painful feeling in the world. But then I found out who you were. Who you are to Emmett, who you will be to me. And the thought of seeing you every day, working across from you and knowing that you think the worst of me, that you despise me. . . it's too excruciating for words. There isn't anything in the world that I wouldn't give to take it all back. To rewind to the beginning and let you go about y-"
"Show me your hand," he cut her off sharply.
Choking on her unspoken words, Bella pulled her hands slowly from her coat pockets. Edward's gloved hand darted out, grabbing her left hand and pulling it closer. She couldn't read the emotions than ran across his face as he stared at her bare ring finger. His teeth were clenched hard enough to crush steel.
"I'm not engaged. Not any more. Mike. . . he ended things between us. Last week. That's why I was leaving Chicago. That's what I was running away from. . ." Her hand was shaking, but his grip was solid. Bella barreled on, "He showed up on my doorstep last night, asking for his ring back, so I gave it to him. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you before. . . before things went so far. And then I was angry and scared. . . I wasn't thinking clearly at all. I'm so, so sorry."
She didn't know what he was thinking. She couldn't tell if he believed her or not. When she felt his grip relax slightly, she pulled her hands back and shoved her frozen fists back into her pockets. Her eyes were burning again, from much more than the cold.
Without a word, he turned around and kept walking. Bella's jaw dropped. She jogged to catch up to him. "Wait up! Edward-"
"This changes nothing," he said when she came alongside him.
"What do you mean? This changes everything! D. . . Doesn't it?" she stammered, suddenly questioning things herself.
Her original fear had been that he would reject her once he realized that she had been dumped by Mike. Who would want to pick up somebody else's castoffs? Now that she was a little bit removed from her own shock and pain, she could see that he wasn't that kind of person. So what was his objection now?
His voice was raspy with pain as he explained, "It took me years to recover from having my heart torn out the last time. I didn't look at another woman for months. I didn't get past the second date for more than a year. And now, when I finally do get serious with a girl, I find out that she views commitment like a kid skipping rocks on the river. Wherever it lands, right? Sorry, honey, but I'm not going to be the one that sinks and drowns because of you."
"That's not it at all. . . I'm not like that!" she cried, grabbing onto his coat sleeve.
He let out a cynical chuckle. "Then what are you like? Because by your own admission, I was your rebound fling. The fact that we've been thrown back together by circumstance doesn't make me your boomerang by default. Now get your hand off of me."
Bella let go as if burned. He was too furious, or maybe too hurt, to hear her. How could she make him see the truth? She wasn't jumping from Mike, to him, then on to whomever else life threw in her path. She had come alive with him. For him. There would never be anyone else who touched her the way he had, not even if she lived to be more than one hundred years old.
When they reached McCarthy Commercial Partners, he held the door for her. His manners were crisp and polite again, but there was a chill between them, even colder than the December air.
She wasn't giving up that easily. Even if it took years to get him to warm up to her again, she had hope. Close enough to touch, but miles apart emotionally, they crossed the lobby to the bank of elevators. A warm, familiar voice pulled her out of her head and back to her surroundings. Bella looked over and let out a surprised laugh.
"Jake? Oh my gosh! When did you become hot?" Jacob was dressed in a black suit over a black shirt, with a narrow burgundy tie. Bella couldn't even believe her best friend had found a suit in his size, let alone one that fit him so well. His hair was smooth as gloss, pulled into a short braid in the back. He could have passed for a haute couture model, not a blue-collar construction worker who had dropped out of community college two classes shy of an associate degree. "Wow. Alice has worked another miracle!"
"The first one being you, of course," he laughed, pulling her into a tight hug.
"Jerk," Bella scolded, pulling back to slug him on one solid bicep. Remembering who was right behind her, Bella turned around to introduce her oldest friend to her. . . she couldn't even define Edward in her own head. "Edward, I'd like to introduce you to-"
"Thanks, but I'll pass," he growled, then stepped into the open elevator. His expression was livid. The air between them had gone from sub-zero to blistering. Bella watched in shock as the doors slid closed.
"Nice guy," Jake scoffed.
"I. . . um. . . yeah. Look. I'd better go. Good luck on your date tonight."
"Thanks, Bells. Take care."
"I'll try," she replied, feeling a flood of misery rising up her throat.
A cool, gentle hand slipped around hers. "That went well," Esme said with a smile.
"Wait. . . what? Where did you come from? I thought you were getting coffee!" Bella cried accusingly.
"I lied. Sue me," Esme replied, rolling her eyes.
"You think that went well? He despises me!" Bella moaned softly, allowing the older woman to pull her into the next elevator.
"Maybe. But he was also jealous as hell when you hugged that gorgeous Native American guy. Nice play. And you didn't even do it on purpose! I have to admit, I haven't seen that much emotion on my boy's face for a long, long time. If not being with you makes him that angry, imagine how happy he'll be when he changes his mind!"
Bella wiped her eyes carefully, trying to preserve her makeup. "Wow. Esme, you are. . ."
"Optimistic?"
"I was going to say insane."
Esme laughed. "I'm also right a vast majority of the time," she said slyly, nudging Bella until she cracked a watery smile. "That's better. Keep doing that. You're gorgeous when you smile."
A/N: Who here loves Vampward? Head on over to the RedEyedEdward Contest page. Nothing fits with the Halloween season better than some blood-soaked one-shots starring our very own Edward Cullen. They're still accepting entries until the 24th. Need a Beta? Yours Truly has been know to break out the red pen once in a while. ;) Send me a PM if you're interested.
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