Disclaimer: Ideas are fictional; not making any money on this. Hawaii 5-0 belongs to CBS. That's okay because none of this would work on TV.
Charles slept for a couple of hours and woke up hungry. Danny changed his diaper and fed him this time, not wanting to push his luck with Steve. It took almost 30 minutes to pack up everything for their outing. Rachel had a travel bag mostly packed except for formula. It took Steve a while to figure out how to anchor the car seat in the Camaro. Grace was really anxious to go and kept asking when they would actually leave the house.
It took almost as long to unload the car once they reached their destination. At least Grace knew how to lock the car seat into the stroller or the guys would still be in the parking lot. As they strolled around the festival, another problem became apparent. The guys were so cute pushing Charles around with Grace in tow, and both men were attracting their share of female attention.
"I have to say that I don't understand it. We're obviously a family here. We're wearing wedding rings. Why do these women continue to eye-hump you?" Danny was talking with his hands, which was why Steve was pushing the stroller.
"Danny, I have no idea. I'm not interested in them. I never notice them until you say something. Some of them are looking at you. And is this something you want to talk about in front of Grace?" Even before Danny, Steve never paid much attention to the adoring females. He was usually too focused on catching the bad guys or risk assessment.
"No, probably not. Grace, wait up. Where are you going in such a hurry?"
"Danno, I see some of my friends from school. Can I go over and say hi?" Grace barely slowed down, forcing Danny to go ahead of Steve and the baby.
Steve was trapped behind a large group of teenagers. "Danny, catch up with Grace. I'll be there as soon as I can get around this mob." Steve saw Danny steer Grace over to the side of the path; he could almost hear the lecture on straying too far from them. Her kidnapping was still too fresh in everyone's mind.
The group in front of Steve was going nowhere for now, and oncoming traffic prevented him from going around them. Steve's cell phone signaled an incoming text message; it was from Danny, indicating that he was taking Grace over to her friends. Steve could see them and waved. He sent a message saying that he would be there as soon as the crowd permitted.
Steve looked down to see how Charles was doing. He was a little disconcerted to see that the baby was studying his every move. "Well, we're stuck here for the time being. Danno's with Grace, so take it easy on me, okay? You're not wet or anything, are you?" Steve leaned over to check the status of the wetness strip.
"It's green. That means you're still dry. There's quite a crowd here today. I can't say that I'm surprised. These things are usually crazy on a Saturday evening. You probably don't know what Saturday means, do you? Every day is Saturday to you. You don't have to worry about getting up to go to school or work. Enjoy it while you can. You've probably figured out by now that I don't have a clue what I'm doing. Danno says that I'm not good with people. He thinks he's kidding, but he's right. I've gotten a lot better at it since I met Danno, but I'll never be as good at it as he is. There's one thing I can promise you. I'll protect you with my life."
Steve was proceeding slowly and looked around to make sure that no danger was present. All he could see was a lot of people having a good time. He turned his attention back to the baby. "You know, you're awfully young to be a 'Charles'. You look more like a 'Charlie'. Charles is the kind of kid who's head of the chess club and gets stuffed in his locker. Charlie might play baseball or football and gets the girl. You're going to need Danno and me to teach you that stuff. Your mom and dad are nice enough, but they're kind of dull and unimaginative. When you get older, we need to talk about science projects. I just need to remember to back Danno's car out of the driveway first."
It was twenty minutes before Steve and Charlie made it to the area where Grace was hanging out with her friends. Danny was sitting on a bench nearby keeping an eye on their daughter. He expected to see a very irate Steve because he was left behind with the baby. He was surprised to see Steve deep in conversation with someone. Danny checked the area for a familiar face and saw no one that he knew.
"So Charlie, always remember to sit in the back of the room in the corner so you can see who's coming in and no one can sneak up on you. And don't walk around with your ear buds in; sometimes you can hear someone before you can see him. Hey, here's Danno. We're here safe and sound, aren't we buddy?" Steve maneuvered the stroller so that the baby was facing them before unlatching the straps so he could pull Charlie out.
Steve positioned the baby on his lap so that he could point out things in the area. "See, there's Grace talking to her friend, Bradley. He just turned ten years old, and Grace went to the party. She was really pretty all dressed up. That kid over there is Tommy. Danno thinks he's a pathological liar. I'm not so sure; I think he just likes to stir up trouble. Either way, kids like that are trouble because you can't trust them."
Danny was having a lot of trouble keeping an eye on Grace while watching Steve with Charlie. When did the baby become Charlie? He was sure that Rachel would have a fit when she heard it, and she most certainly would. It seemed that Steve and the baby had bonded, and now Steve was giving Charlie the same spiel that Danny heard constantly and mostly ignored. He ran his hand over his face, not sure whether to laugh or cry. This was not what he had expected this weekend.
It was getting worse quickly. Now that they were in one spot, the circling females were coming in for a landing. "Commander McGarrett, Detective Williams, I'm Sherry Purdue. My son, Mason, is in Grace's class. I've seen you when you drop Grace off in the morning. It's so nice to have this opportunity to chat. And what a darling baby! Did you adopt?"
Before Danny could answer, Steve spoke up. "No, Charlie is just hanging out with us for a while. We have to take him home by midnight or he'll turn back into a pumpkin. Ow!" The last was added when Danny elbowed Steve in the ribs.
"We're watching him as a favor this weekend. It looks like the kids are settling down; I think the show is starting?" The kids who had been milling around a large grassy area in front of the stage were now facing the stage, waiting for the show to start. A local teen band soon started playing; they were a favorite attraction with the kids.
Steve wasn't sure what the kids saw in these guys, but he was sure that the loud music wasn't good for Charlie. "Danny, Charlie doesn't like the loud music. The band is scheduled to play for at least 30 minutes. I'm going to walk over towards the local exhibits. Why don't you meet me when this is over by the food tents?
Danny was surprised when Steve pulled a clean diaper, a flannel blanket, and a bottle of formula out of the bag before walking off. "Hey, aren't you going to take the stroller?"
"No, it's too hard to navigate in this crowd, and Charlie can't hear me all the way down there." Steve positioned the blanket on his shoulder so the baby would have a soft surface to rest against. Steve kept up his conversation with Charles as they walked; he drew a lot of admiring glances as he went. Eventually, Charles grew fussy. This time, the wetness indicator was blue.
"When you get a little older, we'll talk about exercising a little self control. Now where can I change you? We need a little privacy, don't we? No need for everyone to see your goods." Steve saw that there was no one behind the canopies where the local vendors were set up. As he knelt on the ground, he realized the ground was a little damp.
"Now listen Charlie, I'm going to take my shirt off so we don't have to do this on the wet grass. Do me a favor, buddy, and don't pee on it." Steve managed to pull his t-shirt off and spread it out before putting Charlie down. He executed a perfect diaper change this time, pulling the wet diaper out and fastening the new one. This time, he gauged the tabs correctly. He folded the old diaper into a neat package the way he saw Grace do it earlier. He found the small bottle of hand sanitizer in his pants pocket and cleaned his hands. Then he realized that he couldn't put on his shirt until he picked Charlie up. With Charlie in his arms, he couldn't pull his shirt on.
"Hey buddy, you should have warned me about this. We're supposed to be watching out for each other." Steve thought for a moment before sitting on the grass cross-legged. Now he had a cradle to lay Charlie on while he donned his shirt. It was a little awkward getting to a standing position with Charlie in his arms, but Steve managed it. Steve found a trash can to dispose of the dirty diaper and found an empty table in the shade near the food tents.
The sun ducked behind a cloud, and the cool breeze off the ocean made the air a little chilly. Charlie was dressed in only a onesie and booties. Steve was comfortable, but he worried that Charlie would get cold. As he positioned Charlie to feed, he wrapped the light flannel blanket around the baby.
That was how Danny and Grace found him. The bottle was almost empty; the fresh air gave Charlie quite an appetite. "Charlie, don't go to sleep on me buddy. It's too early. Danno and Grace are here, and the big kids are going to eat. I need one more burp from you. You've done a really good job so far. I think they heard that last one on the big island."
As he thumped on Charlie's back, Steve smiled up at Danny and Grace. "Are you guys ready to eat? I'm starved! I've been watching people walk by with all kinds of food, and I know what I want. How was the show Grace?" When Charlie burped, Steve turned his head to give Charlie a kiss on his cheek. "Good job, buddy. Do you want to go back in your stroller now?" Steve expertly shifted the baby into his seat and latched the straps. Then he lightly draped the blanket over Charlie to block the breeze.
Danny sat next to Steve, utterly charmed. "Who are you, and what did you do with my slightly goofy partner who knows nothing about taking care of babies? And when did the baby become Charlie? I'm pretty sure that Rachel won't like it."
"Well, we don't want him to get beat up when he gets older, now do we? Charlie and I are getting along just fine, aren't we buddy?" Steve smoothed his hair down, and his finger lingered on Charlie's cheek.
"I'll admit that it suits him. Why don't you take Grace and get your food? I'll stay here with Charlie so we don't have to maneuver the stroller through all these tables." Danny watched Steve and Grace go off in search of food and turned his attention back to the baby. Charlie was chewing on his fist and kicking his legs contentedly.
"And you, you've gone over to the dark side with super-SEAL. Your mom and dad are going to kill me. I don't know what he's been telling you, but it is never permissible to throw a suspect in a shark tank or dangle him off a tall building. And there will be no playing catch with a live grenade." Danny rested his chin in his hand while he contemplated what kind of damage Steve could have done to the baby in just a few hours.
Steve and Grace returned in a few minutes, each carrying a tray of food. "Danno, they've got some amazing food in there. Some of it doesn't have pineapple or spam. You can go on; we've got Charlie."
Danny was reluctant to leave, but his stomach was growling. By the time he returned, Grace was calling her brother Charlie too. She was telling the baby about the show and how some of the girls in her class had a crush on the drummer. "I don't think he's that cute, but my friend Jenny likes his tattoos. I don't think his tattoos are nearly as neat as Daddy's."
Danny's day was just getting worse. He did not want to hear his little girl talk about a boy's tattoos or how she thought Steve's were 'neat'. He was afraid that Grace would want her own neat tattoo for her next birthday. Danny sat down next to Grace, but Steve insisted on keeping the stroller near him.
They stayed at the festival until dusk. The horizon was beautiful with the rosy glow of the sunset. Grace wanted to stay a little longer, but Steve was worried that the night air was too cool for Charlie. It took less time to pack up and head home. Once there, Grace went upstairs to take her shower while the guys took care of Charlie.
They bathed Charlie in the kitchen in a large plastic tub. Danny did most of the work while Steve supported the baby's head. Charlie enjoyed the warm water, and Steve demonstrated the proper splash technique. A few minutes later, Danny came back into the kitchen. "Do you want to get Charlie dried off and dressed. I put the portable crib up in the guest room. That way he won't disturb you."
Danny watched Steve give one more splash before he laid the baby on the thick towel on the counter. Steve dried him gently, talking the entire time. "That was fun, wasn't it Charlie? When you get a little older, I'll teach you how to swim. Grace already swims like a fish. You'll be the same way. You've had a busy day. I know that you're probably missing your mommy by now, but Danno, Grace, and I are going to take good care of you. Mommy and Daddy will be back tomorrow afternoon. Danno's going to feed you, and you can go to bed. If you need us, you just need to call us. We'll be right there."
Steve kissed Charlie on the forehead before handing him over to Danny. "I'm going to get my shower. I think the crib should be in our room. That way he won't be afraid if he wakes up. I'll move it when I go up, and I'll turn the lights down. You can take him up when he's ready."
Steve moved the crib and rummaged in the closet until he found what he was looking for. He set one of the walkie-talkies on the nightstand near the crib and locked it in the 'ON' position. That way they could hear Charlie from the living room. He lingered in the shower as he reviewed the day. For the first time, he could understand Danny's attraction to babies. They are pretty amazing. Before today, he told himself that he would accept adding a baby to their family if it would make Danny happy. Now, Steve knew that he had it in him to want a baby too.