Title: The ARK Angels of DX and the Rated R Godfather
Author: Kaykyaka
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the WWE and TNA characters used within this fictional story. No copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made by this work of fiction.
Ratings: T
Characters: Shawn, Cameron and Cheyenne Michaels, Amy 'Lita' Dumas Michaels, Hunter Hurst Helmsley, LC Helmsley, Aurora Rose Helmsley, Chyna, Trish Stratus, Randy Orton, Melina and Johnny Hennigan, Carlito, Edge, Shelton Benjamin, Stephanie and Chris Jericho, the RAW and Smackdown Superstars
Summary: Edge comes into contact with some very angry men and he asks the ARK Angels of DX for help. Little did he know how this would affect Randy and Trish's very special day or Melina's mission in Fiji.
Chapter Thirty Five – Save the Last Dance for Me
The wedding hall was completely full now and LC had to slide through people to get one of the waiter's attention. It seemed being in a room full of adults had its pitfalls, it didn't occur to the wait staff that the children in attendance might be thirsty as-well.
"Hey!" LC called to the waiter but he didn't hear her and she stamped her boot angrily on the hard wood floor. Cameron and Cheyenne came over to her with Alannah who was smiling from ear-to-ear.
"What's with you did you get a drink?" LC asked Alannah.
"No she just got some really good news," Cameron replied.
"Does it involve fluid replenishment?" LC asked and Alannah frowned.
"No," she said bemused by the term.
"Well then its not good news!" LC exclaimed.
"Oh yes it is – Uncle Edge is now Lany's godfather," Cameron said and LC nodded impressed and reached out her hand for Alannah to shake.
"Well that is good news – welcome to the wacky world of professional wrestling parties where aquamarine blue wearing wait staff refuse to acknowledge that one of the boss' kids might be a little thirsty!" LC said, "Hello?" she yelled waving at the waiter again but he still couldn't see her.
"I think you need a better way to get his attention, climb up on my shoulders," Cameron said.
"Ah now you're thinking," LC said and she climbed up on Cameron's shoulders and waved at the wait staff again but she was still too far away for anyone of them to see her, "I need to get up higher!" LC said.
"Let me climb up on your shoulders," Alannah said and Cameron gave her a boost so she could climb onto LC's shoulders and she waved at the wait staff but they still didn't acknowledge the children, "They don't see me," Alannah said.
"Where's that godfather of yours maybe he could get me a drink," LC said looking around for the tall Canadian with a big smile on his face.
"You guys need to be taller!" Cheyenne said and she picked up Cameron who was shouldering both LC and Alannah and put him on her shoulders.
Shawn looked over from the other side of the room and nudged Hunter who was trying to put alcohol in the fruit punch, "Who's that really tall kid over there?" he asked his DX partner.
"I don't know, does the Great Khali have a sister?" Hunter wondered and he went back to the punch but HBK snatched it off the table, "What are you doing?" Hunter asked him.
"I see what you're trying to do there," Shawn said noticing the flask in Hunter's hand, "Trish and Randy said the punch has to be alcohol free,"
"They won't even notice," Hunter said reaching for Shawn but HBK moved the punch bowl out of the way, "Shawn don't make me do something I'll regret," Hunter warned Shawn.
"Are you threatening me?" HBK said.
"Are you gonna give me back the punch bowl?" Hunter asked.
"What do you think?" Shawn replied and Hunter lunged for him.
"Give me that bowl!" he said reaching out for Shawn's shirt but HBK ran between the other wrestlers holding the punch bowl high above his head.
"What's that in daddy's hands?" Cheyenne said to Cameron noticing the punch bowl HBK was running around with. LC turned in the direction that Cheyenne was looking and smiled.
"Punch!" she cried, "After him!" she said to Cheyenne who walked towards her father with Cameron, LC and Alannah on her shoulders. As she moved through the crowd Cameron and LC kept getting bumped into by the other wrestlers.
"Watch it MVP!" LC snapped rubbing her arm as MVP accidentally nudged her.
"My bad LC – whoa!" MVP said turning around and seeing the ARK Angels stacked on top of each other with Alannah on the top like a walking human totem pole.
"We're getting closer to Uncle Hunter," Cameron said as they closed in on DX.
"Cheyenne stick your foot out and trip him up," LC said.
"You want me to make your daddy fall flat on his face?" Cheyenne asked.
"It's better than your daddy falling flat on his face – he might spill the punch!" LC said.
"Cheyenne holla at them," Cameron said.
"Okay – DA-DD-Y!" Cheyenne hollered and everyone covered their ears which were splitting on account of Cheyenne's Phenomenal yell.
Shawn stopped and turned around wondering where Cheyenne was calling from, "Chey?" he asked looking around and Hunter crashed into him like a football player and the punch bowl went flying. LC's eyes widened in horror as the punch bowl sailed through the air but Alannah caught it before any of it could spill.
"Nice catch Lany," Cheyenne said and suddenly she scrunched up her nose.
"Chey are you okay?" Cameron said looking down at his sister and LC raised the punch bowl to her face about to take a big gulp.
"I gotta sneeze," Cheyenne said.
"Chey no!" Cameron cried but Cheyenne couldn't hold it back, she sneezed not just any sneeze but a Phenomenal sneeze and Alannah went flying into the air, Cameron fell onto his father and LC landed head-first in the punch bowl which her father had caught.
"Bless you," Alannah said to Cheyenne from the comfort of Edge's arms, the Rated R Superstar had been right there to catch her which kind of summarized their relationship from the start.
"Aren't you glad you didn't spike the punch bowl now?" Shawn asked Hunter.
"I think my daughter could hold her own in a drinking contest," Hunter said and CM Punk shook his head.
"You are one depraved human being," he said.
"And you are gonna be one fired employee if you ever disrespect me in front of the roster again," Hunter said and Shawn slapped him on the arm, "What?" Hunter said.
"You sounded like that dude we used to work for, what was his name again?" Shawn said scratching his head.
"What did he look like?" Hunter asked.
"He was kind of old, walked like a crazy person and had shark eyes," Shawn said.
"Doesn't ring a bell, why would we wanna be like that?" Hunter asked.
"We wouldn't that's my point, now apologize to Punk for mocking his Straight Edge lifestyle," Shawn said and Hunter chuckled.
"Straight Edge – sounds like something you use to get a girl drunk," Hunter said and Shawn looked apologetically at Punk and was about to admonish Hunter when a pair of familiar hands took LC out of the punch bowl, picked it up and poured the remains over Hunter's head.
"Aunt Steph!" LC said and indeed it was Stephanie McMahon Jericho who had come with The Rock.
"Drinks on you," Stephanie said laughing cheekily at Hunter and the Cerebral Assassin scowled at his ex-wife.
"You know just because you live in New York now that doesn't mean I won't get you back for this," Hunter said as the red liquid dripped from the top of his head onto the shoulders of his crisp white shirt.
LC pulled the hem of Stephanie's dress, "You didn't bring my dad with you did you?" she asked her and Alannah frowned.
"He didn't want to come, he said he had better things to do then watch Randy Orton ruin his life," Stephanie replied.
"I thought Uncle Hunter was your dad?" Alannah asked LC.
"He is and so is her husband," LC replied and Alannah looked at Edge who nodded.
"It's a long story," he said.
"What's his name?" Alannah asked LC.
"Chris Jericho and but I think he should change his last name to 'psycho' Jericho because he's crazy," LC said.
"Well at least he's not a gangster," Alannah replied.
"Hey way-to-bring the party down everybody," The Rock said, "Are we here to celebrate the union of Trish and Randy or talk about what lousy fathers we have?"
"The first thing you said, otherwise we'd be here all night," Stephanie said.
"We don't have a lousy father," Cheyenne said referring to HBK, "Do we Cameron?"
"No God's the best Father you could ever have," Cameron replied.
"I think she was talking about me but you make a good point," Shawn said as Trish and Randy came into the room and everyone broke into a round of applause.
Randy waved at everyone respectfully, he was wearing royal blue shirt with khaki shorts suitable for such warm weather and he had a necklace around his neck made out of the shell that he found for Trish in the Astrolabe Reef. Trish was wearing a green-blue Fiji necklace with a starfish pendant on a green ribbon to compliment the green-blue dress she was wearing. The starfish necklace was a wedding present from Amy and Shawn, Amy told Shawn it reminded her of the starfish she nearly ate in South Beach back in Florida. The dress was a wedding present from Melina as was the seashell clip she had tying back her hair. It came as no surprise to The Truth that her sisters in Christ had color-co-coordinated their wedding gifts; it was their sense of unity that made the angelic trio so strong.
All eyes were on the newlyweds as they made their way to the back of the hall where a very marine-looking table was set up for them to make their speeches from.
"Jeff really did I great job on this hall," Trish said as she walked around the table.
"Yeah I must remember to thank him when he's done making out with Ashley in the lobby," Randy said.
Trish waved at Rocky who was able to make it after all and she noticed the heavily pregnant Stephanie who obviously hadn't grown tired of laughing at her ex-husband's expense. At least she hadn't let her new husband's foul mood stop her from coming to the wedding, still it was hard to imagine even Jericho having a bad time at what had turned out to be a truly wonderful experience for Randy and Trish.
As the room quieted down Trish and Randy were about to make their wedding speech and for the first time all week Randy was nervous. As he looked out at all their guests he saw his father looking back at him, seeing his father there at that moment confirmed that Randy had done exactly what his father wanted him to do and that was make him proud. After all the years of trying to please his old man he had succeeded, now all he had to do was please his wife and his Father in Heaven and everything would finally be alright.
"Well I did it," Randy started off saying, "I married Trish right here in Fiji and as much as we would both love to live here and spend the rest of our lives watching the sun go down on the beach, tomorrow we'll be back in the United States and you know what that means Mickie James and John Cena. It's back to business,"
"Boo!" Alannah cried out in response to the heel wedding speech Randy just made and the wrestlers laughed at how cute she was, the wrestling thing was so new to her and Edge remembered how cool it was to just be a fan.
"But seriously I want to thank you all for coming and not just because Shawn and Hunter made you but because most of you know how unlikely it was that I would ever settle down, especially with Trish – you all know the story by now, we were like water and oil. Now we're like Shawn and Amy, Hunter and Joanie, my mom and dad, LC and Cameron -"
"He's talking about us people!" LC said loudly pulling Cameron over to her and everyone turned and looked at her laughing.
"Are you sure there was no alcohol in that punch?" Punk asked Hunter.
"Why don't you come over here and find out?" Hunter said menacingly and Velvet Sky shushed Hunter who gave her a DX chop and she responded by slapping her butt and telling him to kiss it, "I would but your boyfriend might get depressed and check into non-Alcoholics Anonymous,"
Aurora shook her rattle and the blue whale sculpture Jeff Hardy had made came crashing down on Hunter. Fortunately for him it was made of aluminum foil and not real whale.
"Thank you Aurora," Trish said and Aurora Rose giggled waving her arms around excitedly and Stephanie beamed at her firstborn child.
"That's my little angel," she said proudly as Randy resumed his speech.
"So in summary I just want to say one more time in front of all my family and friends, Trish I love you and I hope you'll be with me til the end of time," Randy said and the wrestlers gushed, some of them started to tear up too along with Randy and Trish's parents.
Trish wiped a tear from her eye and smiled at her adoring husband, "I think I can sum up how I feel by saying that even when this world has passed away I'll still love you. When Jesus Christ is high and lifted up for all to see and worship in all His glory I'll still love you. When we join up in Heaven and my angelic sisters in Christ are ministering to people from the Throne of God I'll be right there with them and I'll still be loving you. What I'm saying is neither life nor death will ever stop me from loving you," Trish said tearfully and Randy's face broke into a river of tears and he embraced her lovingly and there wasn't a single Superstar not crying now. Seeing Randy break down his wall and give into his true feelings was the most humbling sight his friends and family had ever seen and any doubt as to whether or not Trish and Randy were in love was now dead and buried.
The bridesmaids, the best man and the godfathers were going to make their non-alcoholic toasts right after Trish and Randy were done but they decided to let the emotion now flowing through the room say what words couldn't say.
"To the bride and groom!" Edge said raising his cup.
"To the bride and groom!" the other wrestlers joined in and the room broke out into applause again.
"To the bride and groom," Hunter said raising his hand shakily from beneath the big blue whale and Jeff came over to him with Ashley wondering what his sculpture was doing on the floor.
"Hey boss are you okay?" Jeff asked Hunter.
"No Jeff I'm having a whale of a time," Hunter said sarcastically, "Now get this thing off me!"
As Jeff lifted the whale off Hunter he remembered his wedding present for Trish and Randy, "Hey guys wait!" Jeff said running over to the newlyweds who were about to have their first dance and he dropped the sculpture back on Hunter and Stephanie looked at him laughing hysterically.
"I came for the cake but I stay for the jokes," she said to Rocky who was laughing at Hunter as-well, in fact there wasn't a person within two yards of him who wasn't. "Who made that beautiful cake anyway?" Stephanie asked looking over at the 3 tier wedding cake on the table.
"I did," Amy said raising her hand and Stephanie and Rocky looked at her surprised.
"And you didn't eat any of it?" Stephanie asked in shock.
"I kind of lost my appetite for cake on the flight over," Amy said giving her husband an amorous look.
"We really need to hang out with these guys more often," Rocky said to Stephanie and she nodded as Shawn blew his wife a kiss while Jeff almost crashed into Trish and Randy.
"Jeff you really did a great job getting this hall ready for the reception, we really appreciate it," Randy said and Trish smiled loving Randy's use of the term 'we'.
"There's more guys, check it out," Jeff said heading behind the table where a curtain was drawn and he emerged a few seconds later dragging a huge plastic globe.
"Oh my goodness," John Cena said as Jeff brought his wedding gift out for everyone to see.
"I knew there was a reason he was so interested in that snow globe," MVP said as Jeff revealed a giant snow globe with a sculpture of Trish and Randy as bride and groom inside surrounded by a plethora of marine life made out of aluminum and in various fluorescent colors.
Randy and Trish loved it, "Jeff it's absolutely beautiful," Trish said and she kissed Jeff gratefully.
"How did you make this its huge?" Randy said looking around at the giant snow globe.
"You'd be surprised at the things you can do with plastic," Jeff Hardy said.
"I have to take a picture of this," Mickie James said getting her Polaroid camera out.
"Can I have a look at that?" Randy said as Mickie waved the picture back and forth.
"Sure," Mickie said and Randy took the picture and waved his hand across it.
He turned the picture to Trish with a smile, "Welcome to the future my love," he said to her and Trish took the picture and saw that the snow globe bride and groom sculptures had now turned into a real life picture of her and Randy and they were holding their firstborn son in what appeared to be New York City.
"Looks like TKO is back," Amy said to Melina looking at the picture as Randy and Trish were about to have their first dance as a married couple.
"The King's Oracle and The Truth – talk about a match made in Heaven," Melina said embracing Amy and together they watched Randy dance like an angel with their angel and the five godfathers watched liking what they saw.
"Shawn really taught that boy how to move," Rocky said impressed with Randy much improved dance skills, "Are you guys wearing matching outfits?" he asked Edge, John Morrison, Shelton and Carlito who were all wearing red shirts.
"We're godfathers Rocky now get a red shirt on and get with the program," Edge said firmly.
"Okay I'll be right back," Rocky said running up to his hotel room to change.
"That's why you're the greatest godfather of all time," Lany said to Edge who got equal recognition from the other godfathers for what he just did.
Edge was godfather of not one but two children now but he disagreed with Alannah's statement. She was the reason he was the greatest godfather of all time and the Rated R Superstar would be forever Alannah Pirelli's PG-13 Hero in a world that was definitely Rated R.
This story is dedicated to the memory of Bo Goff.
This story is also dedicated to the people of Orissa, India who are being murdered for believing in Jesus Christ.
The Adventures of the ARK Angels of DX will continue in Monster Ink.