Chapter Thirty Five

White filled her eyes, completely encompassing her mind, and devouring any sense of self she had remaining by the end of the incantation. Like the feeling you get when someone takes a picture with flash that you aren't prepared for, it was a great flash leaving a piercing pain and a blinding whiteness in its wake. If pain had a color, Cecilia Potter was sure that she had finally solved the mystery and figured it out: white, for that's all she saw as excruciatingly painful tremors flowed through her body, setting every nerve on fire, the pain far worse than each time she had been held under the torture curse. Every slight twitch of her taut muscles caused the burning to intensify and the whiteness to blaze again. The girl laid with her back arched in pain, her mouth open in a silent scream and eyes staring unseeingly into the endless white expanse surrounding her, nothing else registering in her brain but the pain she was experiencing that was unlike anything she had ever been put through before.

Lost in the painful sensations rippling through her body, she didn't notice as the cloud blocking her vision began to move around her, morphing into vague shapes. Faces that remained blurry moved around Cecilia, closing in on her figure. Voices whispered in her ear and shapes flashed before her eyes, places and people and voices and words she didn't recognize, all moving too fast to catch more than a glimpse or a flash of a face distorted by the whiteness around it. The voices and noises began blurring together and growing into an unbearable cacophony of sound: pearls of laughter brighter than the sun, sobs that tugged on even the toughest of heartstrings, screams of unadulterated terror that chill you to your very core. It was as if every sound she had ever heard was playing in unison repeatedly, amplified tenfold making it all that much worse.

And suddenly everything stopped. The abruptness left a ringing in Cecilia's ears and her eyes blinking rapidly before closing them, unable to focus on anything with the spinning in her head. Cecilia reached out to touch the solid ground with her hands, gripping at the hard surface, trying to find a anchor to hold her steady. Deep, gasping breaths racked through Cecilia's body as she struggled to regain control of her body and slow the tremors from the pain she had experienced.

"Cecilia?" A hand gently raised her from her collapsed position on the floor. "What happened? Are you okay? Look at me, speak to me."

The world still spun around her as her eyes creaked open. Nothing would still long enough to allow her to process it. "I can't..." She shook her head slightly only to find the action made her mind protest more and her stomach churn violently. Without ceremony, Cecilia turned away from the person supporting her upper body and emptied the contents of her stomach from the small dinner she had managed to finish.

"Cecilia?" With her stomach contents purged from her body and her mind finally calming down she was able to recognize the person who had helped her sit up. Draco's hand pushed back her hair from where it was matted to her forehead by sweat. "What happened?"

Cecilia scrambled for her wand and vanished the mess she had created. "It's nothing, Draco. I just had a bit of a dizzy spell. I'm fine. You can go back to bed."

Draco helped her to her feet with a frown on his face. "'A bit of a dizzy spell'?" He questioned incredulously, holding the girl upright as he directed her movements toward a chair. "You were unconscious on the floor for several minutes before you responded to me." He sat her down in the seat and stared hard at her for several long minutes.

"Cecilia, I need to know what just happened because I have one idea but I don't want it to be the fucking truth." He pulled his sleeve down and wiped the girl's forehead and then lowered it for her to see. The once pristine white shirt was now stained with splotches of red.

Cecilia stared down at her hands as she twisted her fingers together, attempting to come up with a suitable response that would satisfy the relentless man before her. With a world weary sigh, Cecilia met his piercing gaze. "It's a long story, Draco, and I honestly don't have the time to explain."

Draco snarled angrily. "Damnit, Cecilia!" He began pacing swiftly, his rage simmering just waiting for his imminent outburst. "I knew something was off with you for days. The others didn't believe me, said it was just a reaction from the last horcrux, but I knew. I knew you were planning something. God damnit, Cecilia, why can't you fucking let others help you once in a while?"

Draco grabbed her arm roughly and dragged her to a mirror. Cecilia's eyes stared into her reflection, taking in her baggy, bloodshot eyes, tangled, matted hair, and the newest addition to her features, the lightning shaped wound marring her once smooth forehead. The blood had since began to clot, stopping it's dripping enough to reveal the red and inflamed edges. "You want to fucking explain, Potter?"

Cecilia and Draco connected eyes in the mirror. "Our lives are really messed up, Draco. Mine and Harry's. It's nothing you want to get involved in."

Draco turned her, more gently this time, to face him. "I've accepted that you're not from this time! I've been on the run with you two for months! I gave up my comfy life to be here with you, Cecilia! Do you think I didn't know what I was getting myself into when I decided to go with you? Because I did, Cecilia; I chose you. Why can't you just let me in?"

She spared a glance to where her brother was still asleep under the influence of the sleeping draught she had drugged him with earlier that night. "You think you know what you got yourself into, but what you know only scratches the surface." A bitter laugh escaped her lips as she refused to meet his piercing gray eyes.

"Then help me understand you, Cecilia. I don't know everything that happened with you after fifth year, but it changed you and I'm trying so hard to figure this new you out, but damnit, Cecilia, you aren't making it easy on me."

"Draco, you of all people wouldn't understand. You couldn't." She gently extracted her person from his grasp and exited the tent knowing he would follow. "Harry's been through so much. He's had to live most of his life with the knowledge that the fate of the wizarding world rests on his shoulders. That's a heavy burden to bear alone. Yes, he's had me, but he had to live with the burden of knowing he was a prime target of the most horrible dark lord our world has faced. I've done something Harry'll probably hate me for once he knows, but nothing will ever change my mind about what I did and why I did it. He deserves so much more than what fate has dealt him and I've done my best to ensure that he'll have better odds this time around."

Draco had risen from his kneeled position now and was staring at his best friend, his eyes slowly widening in alarm. "What do you mean, Cecilia: 'better odds this time around'?"

Cecilia faced Draco once more. "When Voldemort tried to kill Harry, the killing curse rebounded off of Harry leaving a scar and struck that monster instead. The magical burst that resulted from the rebounded curse marked me."

Draco moved closer to Cici and reached out a tentative hand to trace the crescent shaped scar hidden behind her right ear. Cecilia placed her own hand over the Slytherin's. "It's more than just a scar, Draco. Parts of Voldemort's soul, attached themselves to us that night. Only a very small fragment resided within me, which gave me a weak connection with Voldemort when he returned; I was lucky. But Harry? Harry was a full blown horcrux."

Draco tilted his head slightly and gave her a puzzled frown. "You used past tense: 'was a horcrux.'"

Cecilia couldn't bear to meet those eyes any longer and lowered her gaze to the floor, inspecting her shoes intently. After a moment, she raised her eyes and met his defiantly. "I told you he has better odds."

Draco grabbed her chin, holding her face in place before she could look away. With his free hand, he traced the wound on her forehead, his eyes widening in wild panic as he finally began guessing at what she had done.

Cecilia broke away from his bruising grip and took several steps back, her eyes shining with unshed tears at the expression he was giving her. "I'm the horcrux now, Draco." Cecilia said in barely a whisper. Their eyes connected for the briefest of seconds before he found himself with a wand to the face.

"Cecilia, please, don't do this." But he hadn't been quick enough; he hadn't expected his best friend to turn her wand on him and the brilliant red light of the stunner she fired at him sped toward his head without interference. Cecilia clenched her eyes shut, refusing to watch the man she loved fall to the ground by her own wand.

A silent tear finally escaped her eyes as she levitated the prone figure to a couch and adjusted him to be as comfortable as an unconscious man could. She stroked his hair from his face after she did this. "I'm so sorry, Draco." The emerald green eyes stayed fixed on the figure far longer than was necessary, and it was only the sounds of someone moving restlessly in their sleep signaling that her potions were beginning to wear off the others that prompted her to move. She placed a gentle kiss on the boy's lips before rising from her kneeled position next to the couch.

With a heavy sigh, Cecilia closed her eyes and allowed herself to fall into her new found connection with the Dark Lord. She found herself in a forest, the lighting dark and shadowy, moonlight streaming in through the thick branches as they swayed in the heavy winds. Through the thick trunks of the surrounding trees, Cecilia could barely make out the outskirts of a town, presumably the next target. Black clad figures surrounded her, staring at her every move as she paced in front of them, their white masks glowing eerily in the dark night.

"It is time, my followers. We have laid in wait for far too long, have lost too much ground. Tonight I show the people of the resistance that they are no match for the might Lord Voldemort!" A cheer rose around her. "Go forth my followers, and teach the people of Hogsmeade the true power of their Lord." The Death Eaters started disappearing with little pops of apparation.

Cecilia pulled herself back into her own mind and body with a great effort, trying to ignore the elation that flowed through her body at the sight of the dark mark appearing above the small town. She rose from the couch and transfigured her features to those of her counterpart, Ice. She discarded her plain black robes in exchange for the brilliant blue dueling robes of Ice. Armed with a new determination to save the people of a town she held near and dear to her heart, it was as if an entirely new person stood in the room.

Ice cast a last longing glance around the tent that had been her home for the past several months before she left behind her friends and family for what she presumed to be the last time as she prepared to sacrifice herself for the sake of her brother.

"I'll talk to you guys again, be that in one month, or one year, I will be back, because I always keep my promises."

Or maybe it'll be two years and two months.

Shit happens, am I right?

I'm in college now. Only eleven weeks from finishing my first year. It seems like it all happened way too fast. But at least I came back, which is more than some authors can say. I was reading through my author's notes from earlier and it was a weird adventure watching me grow up from freshman year to now, and I'm kind of glad there's a record of it.

If you're still around or new, thanks for your time. Lord knows I probably don't deserve it.

-wd

2/21/15