A/N: I have no rights to Sons of Anarchy.

Chapter 37

(Episode 3:8 Lochan Mor) (Lochan Mor means great pond in Gaelic)

Tara woke with a start at dawn and quietly listened to her surroundings. When she was convinced she was alone she got up went into the bathroom. After a quick, hot shower, she pulled on her comfortable pajamas and Jax's flannel robe. She went to the kitchen and made a cup of coffee and then wandered back toward the bedroom, stopping at the door of the nursery.

She slowly walked in and stared at the empty crib. This baby was her decision. She sat down in the rocker and looked into the crib. But she wanted it so badly. It was hers and Jax's. Something she never thought was possible even a year ago. But Jax didn't want her. If Jax wanted her, it would be different, she would be rejoicing over the tiny peanut growing inside of her. But he didn't, which made every thought of the peanut feel like a stab in her heart.

She heard her phone beep in the bedroom. Shaking off all of those thoughts, she left the nursery and went to check her messages. One of the prospects was passing on a message from Piney.

"Tig arrested. Please post bail."

Tara shook her head and checked the time. She was sure this had something to do with Gemma's escape, so she dressed for work and went to dry her hair.

Jax & Tara

She walked into Charming PD and was amazed how it never changed. This place had been like second home to her for a while when she was younger and she was beginning to feel that way again.

"Can I help you?" the blonde cop, she recognized as Melissa Michaels, asked.

"I am here to post bail for Alexander Trager."

"Of course, Dr. Knowles," Melissa said and began the paperwork to put through the bail.

Tara sat in the chair by her desk and they idly chatted while Melissa put the paperwork through.

After a while, she heard the sound of boots and chains enter the room and stood.

"Ah, Doc, thanks," Tig said sincerely.

"Sure," Tara said. Tig put his hand on her shoulder, a gesture of protection only a Son would get away with. "Can we go?" Tara asked Unser.

"Get his stuff," Unser directed Melissa. Tig and Tara turned to follow her.

"Hey, um," Unser said touching Tara's arm, stopping her. "I handed over our information to the FBI. They are going to be talking to hospital personnel today about Gemma's escape.

Tara looked down and nodded. "I know."

"But if there's something you forgot to tell us yesterday, its understandable. You could catch me up now and I'll make sure the feds know it was our oversight."

Tara considered all of the possibilities and shook her head. "I didn't forget anything."

She turned to catch up with Tig.

"You're a doll, thanks," Tig said to Melissa when she gave him his cut.

"Uh, somebody else is going to have to pick up that tow truck from the impound," Unser said. "Your license has been suspended."

"What? Why?" Tig asked.

"You took three arms of law enforcement on a hundred mile an hour goose chase. It'll be two years before your behind the wheel."

"Are you serious? How the hell am I supposed to work? How am I going to ride? Come on man, you'll be dead before I get that license back."

Tara turned and shot him a smile of admiration. This man was only scary to those outside the ring.

"Get him out of here."

"Come on," Tara said putting her hand on Tig's shoulder and turning him around. "We'll call the garage, have somebody pick you up at impound."

"This is bullshit," Tig muttered as they left the precinct.

Tara got in the drivers side and waited while Tig arranged himself. Tara handed him her phone. "Call the garage, I'll drive you over now."

Jax & Tara

Tara leaned her head on the steering wheel as she listened to Tig and Kozik fight about riding together.

"Jesus, Tig, get in the truck, I have to get to work," Tara called out the window.

"Alright, alright," Tig said climbing into the passenger side.

Jax & Tara

During her rounds, Tara got a call from the shop and headed over to help them find some paper work after she finished.

She half listened to Chucky tell her his story as she went through the filing cabinet.

"I don't mind jail, I just like it here better," Chucky said.

"Yeah, me too," Tara agreed flipping to the next file.

"Where's my 5/8 socket?" Tig barked in the garage. Tara turned to monitor the situation.

"I got it."

"Hey, those aren't your god damned tools."

"Blow me," Kozik retorted.

"What!"

"I said blow me."

"I need that socket."

Their voices died down, but they continued arguing.

"God what is up with those two?" Tara asked as she and Chucky watched from the doorway.

"Not sure, but judging by their level of malevolence, there has got to be at least one vagina involved."

God she loved the frankness of the people in her life. "Thanks for the insight. I'll check the clubhouse for the receivables," she said turning away.

Tara walked out to the parking lot and watched Kozik and Tig continue to argue and noticed how everyone else was ignoring them.

She saw Lyla pull in and get out of her car and wave.

"Hey," Lyla greeted.

"Hi."

"I just want to say I'm sorry about what happened yesterday with Ima."

Tara shook her head. "Its not your fault. I, um, saw you hit her," Lyla smiled. "Thank you for that."

"My pleasure," Lyla said with a grin. "Um, could I ask a favor?"

"Ok," Tara said following Lyla to the table under the awning at the clubhouse.

They sat and she noticed how nervous Lyla looked.

"I, uh, need a good clinic for an abortion. Some place you can get in quick, pay cash."

"How far along are you?"

"Not far, eight weeks," Lyla answered.

"I can't think of any off hand," Tara said processing the information. It couldn't be Opie's. Shit did he even know Lyla eight weeks ago?

"What about Kettleman?" Tara asked of the clinic she did some work for.

"They only take HMOs, I don't want this on the books," Lyla said shaking her head. "Word gets out, it could hurt potential gigs."

Tara smiled and raised her eyebrows. "I'll ask around."

"Cool, thanks," Lyla said getting up to leave.

"Does, um, Opie know?"

Lyla stopped and turned.

"No, timings just not right," Lyla said. "I've been here before, Doc."

Lyla turned and left. Tara sat and contemplated the situation before getting up to look for the receivables.

Jax & Tara

Tara headed back to the hospital after handling the paperwork crisis at the shop and made her rounds again. When she was finished, she went in search of Margaret to ask her about the clinic for Lyla.

She saw her at the nurse's station. "Do you have a minute?"

She nodded and Tara turned to lead her to an empty waiting room.

"I gave the FBI my statement. Don't worry, I didn't change my mind."

"Oh, thank you," Tara said shaking her head. "This is about something else. A friend of mine needs a procedure, probably an MVA, but it has to be discreet. She doesn't want to report it to her HMO. It's a job thing."

"There's a family center in Merced County that will do abortions anonymously."

"Can she get an appointment quickly?"

"I'll make a call."

"Thank you."

"I guess your...friend is going to need some down time afterwards. I'll make sure its covered."

"Wait, you think this is about me?"

Margaret shook her head. "Its none of my business, but if it was, I'd tell you you were doing the right thing."

"Why? Because you think the father's a criminal?"

"Because I think the mother's uncertain about her future. She knows that would be an unstable environment for a baby."

Tara watched her leave. Her mind slowly letting that sink in. It was different hearing it from someone else, the thoughts she was having were so similar. But she was at least more positive about the situation.

Jax & Tara

Margaret gave Tara the appointment information and Tara called Lyla and told her she had an appointment and that Tara would be by to pick her up later.

Lyla was quiet on the way to the clinic and Tara let her remain so. She remembered what it was like on your way to an abortion.

Lyla registered and they sat in the waiting area quietly.

"Thanks again for this," Lyla said again. "I don't really have any people except Ope."

"Its ok, I don't mind," Tara said with a small smile.

"You must think I'm a freak, right? Porn star, baby killer."

Tara released her breath. "I don't think that. Are you sure you want to go through with it?"

Lyla nodded. "Yeah. I love Ope. Be nice to have kids with him someday."

"But not now?"

"Donna's ghost looms pretty large in that house. Ope tries to let me in, but the fear of something awful always keeps me on the outside. I don't really know the guy."

"Sarah Palin?" the nurse asked from behind them.

"Guess that's me," Lyla said standing. Tara stood with her and they hugged.

Tara pulled back. Lyla smiled. "Ok."

She turned and followed the nurse back and Tara looked at the receptionist. Lyla had a good point. Someday. But not today.

"Excuse me," she said stepping up to the counter. "I'd like to schedule an appointment."

"A follow up for your friend?"

"No, for me actually. I'm about seven weeks along."

"Sure," the receptionist said with a smile. She handed Tara a form to fill out.

Tara took a deep breath and filled out the forms, setting an appointment for the next evening.

Jax & Tara

Tara sat back down and waited for Lyla. They chatted a bit on the way home. Lyla asked Tara about Opie when they were younger and Tara regaled her with some stories about their hijinks in high school. When they got home, Lyla squeezed Tara's hand.

"Thank you."

"Its not a problem. I'm always here if you need anything."