Disclaimer: I do not own the X-men or anything related to X-men.
Thanks for reading the newest chapter everyone. It is nice of you to take time out of your busy lives to look at the chapter. This chapter is probably going to be shorter than the others. Thank you again for reading this story!
When I opened my eyes again, the space surrounding me sent my brain into a dizzy spell. The entire place was a stark white that almost reminded me of a bedroom in an insane asylum. There was no way to discern where the floor met the bottom of the wall or at what point the walls touched the edges of the ceiling.
"At least no one put me in a straight jacket," I rubbed my head gently and braced myself for intense pain before attempting to stand up.
Surprisingly, there was not only no pain when I moved, but I also discovered that my clothing had lost its tears and stains from the previous battles. Even my wrists and ankles had lost their second-degree burns. When it finally settled into my brain that I was somehow healed, my mind snapped back to the obvious conclusion; I must have landed in Molly world.
"Molly!" I called out the name in a softer voice, before cupping my hands around my mouth and shouting loudly, "Molly!"
When she didn't reply to the louder shout, I began to slowly and cautiously explore the strange place. It took me a few unsure steps to get used to the idea that I wasn't going to suddenly walk into a wall or stub my toe in a hidden corner. I must have looked idiotic, but once I got the hang of moving around the room, my movements became smoother and I started to quicken my pace.
The last time I had visited Molly, we had been in a bedroom. Well, to be specific, we had been in my bedroom. The idea that I was searching for an imaginary friend in a bland colored maze was a little ridiculous even for my life. If Molly was just a figment of my imagination why couldn't I bring her to me?
Why was I in a place like this anyway?
I increased my speed to a slow jog as the walls around me began to change colors. Where there had once been simple, unimaginative designs were now open fields of grass and full meadows of multicolored flowers. I stopped for a moment and took a deep breath of clean air. If I was going crazy, at least I was going crazy in a place that looked and smelled like the world's most beautiful picnic location. As my eyes reopened I noticed a mountain range appear on the distant horizon with snow covering the very top of its peaks.
"Hey, Lexster!"
The sound echoed throughout my little field and forced my attention to focus on a small group of people standing in the distance. I squinted my eyes to try and pull them into focus, but I wasn't able to distinguish anything more than the fact that there were three of them standing on a raised part of the hilly countryside.
"Who…" I mumbled the words out and let my bare feet start racing towards the group.
There was something about the mystery trio that made me feel like my heart was going to jump right out of my chest. The strangest sense of a memory began to float through my mind. It was almost like the thought was at the front of my memory bank, but I just couldn't understand what the picture was supposed to be. All I knew for certain was that I had to find them.
About three feet from the group, my feet stopped their frantic pace. I dipped down and rested my hands on my knees to try and catch my breath before addressing the group. After a few deep and jagged breaths, I straightened my back and found myself staring into the eyes of my long-lost siblings.
Nicholas, Lyre, and Marina no longer looked like the same young teens and kids that I remembered from my childhood. They had somehow grown up and turned into adults who only faintly resembled their younger counterparts. I could see the spark of silliness and mischief in Nicholas' eyes, but the fact he was so muscular and mature looking threw me for a loop. Where was the skinny teen whose voice cracked when I used to annoy him?
My sisters, my brain took a mental pause as the word echoed throughout my head, looked similar to me. What a funny idea to think that someone out in the world had the same chin and eye shape as me. I had become so accustomed to the idea that I was alone in the world that the look of love shimmering in their matching emerald eyes made me shiver.
I wasn't alone. I had a real family. Even if they were possibly only alive in my subconscious.
"How…"
"Alex," Lyre, the most mature of us all probably, stopped my stammering by wrapping her arms around my shoulders. I expected her to float through me like some sort of figment of my imagination, but she held me tightly in a warm embrace that felt like coming home. "You did it."
"I just…" I paused a moment, feeling completely ridiculous as the tears threatened to escape my eyes, "I am sorry."
Lyre hummed gently and pet my hair comfortingly with one hand. She whispered some soothing words that I could barely focus on and let me cry like a baby into her shoulder. Marina wrapped her arms around us and joined Lyre in the attempt to pacify my emotional outburst. I had always secretly found gestures like a group hug pretty dumb, but now as I savored the comfort of their tight hold I wondered if I had just lacked someone I loved deep enough to make that jump. There was no shame in my heart or my mind as I felt my brother join our makeshift group hug. It was almost like they needed me as much as I needed them.
"You sure grew up, Lexster." Nicholas pulled our hug apart as he turned back to the conversation at hand, "Maybe you aren't just a whiny kid sister after all."
The girls rolled their eyes at him, but I found myself laughing at his comments. The memories I had were still being slowly dusted off and replaced in my memory bank, but I had a distinct impression of my big brother being the biggest trickster. It was the quality our parents had always hated that I idolized. And despite the large age gap between us, we had created our fair share of mischief throughout the castle.
"I can't believe you are here." I looked at each of them in turn and felt a goofy grin coat my face, "You are real right? I mean we can touch and all. So you aren't dead after all?"
The silence fell over our group with an unnerving swiftness and finality. They shared looks that said all that could ever be said on the subject. It didn't matter that I had battled Sunil or started to awaken my mimic abilities, they were still gone forever. I couldn't fix this problem no matter what I did. They were still gone…
"We aren't leaving you." Marina touched my cheek and forced me to look back up at them, "We will always be with you. No matter what, we are with you Alex."
"But how are you here with me now?"
"Does it really matter?" She countered and dropped her hand from my cheek, "What matters is that for this moment in time, we are here together."
I couldn't find a way to argue that point. How many people wanted one last moment with their loved ones? Here I was getting a chance to say goodbye to my family and I was too caught up in the hows and whys to enjoy anything.
The time began to fly by as I let go of my reservations and just let myself be fully in the moment. We laughed and talked about things that hadn't been in my mind or heart for years. All of the silly pranks we played on the guards, the extravagant family celebrations, and even the sad nights like when we had lost our grandmother. It was a whole lifetime of conversations in the span of only a few hours, but it meant the world to me.
"I could stay here forever." I admitted as I lay back on the soft grass and stared at the fluffy clouds floating by in the sky. "We could just stay here together."
"Alex."
The newest voice broke my daydreamy state and forced me to sit up. I couldn't see any sign of my siblings, but it almost seemed unimportant since the man standing in front of me took the rest of my attention.
Thomas Lenox was as tall and handsome as he had been all those years ago. His face was covered in the same stubble that used to tickle my cheeks when I kissed his cheek. The tiny wrinkles beside his eyes were a little more pronounced than I remembered, and a single strand or two of white hair were peeking out through his otherwise dark brown locks.
I stood up gradually and brushed the blades of grass off of my sweater and pants. Without the chaos of a battle raging around us, I could finally take the time to actually stare at his memorable dark emerald eyes and kind smile. He was dressed in only a light sweater, fitted khakis, and a pair of dark dress shoes, but he still held a strong royal presence. But far more importantly, he still looked like my daddy.
"Dad, I…" The words were mumbled out awkwardly before I let myself give in to the emotions and throw my arms around his chest. "I… I'm so sorry."
He wrapped his strong warm arms around me and I breathed in the deep scent of his favorite cologne. It was the same cologne that I could remember buying with Marina for his birthday. The last birthday my dad had ever had with his entire family. The thought made me wrap my arms around him even tighter as if he would vanish at any moment.
"It is okay." He gently rubbed my back and let me finish the last build up of tears, "You have nothing to be sorry for Alex."
"I," I pulled my face from his chest, physically unable to produce anymore tears after the two hard crying sessions, "I forgot you. I forgot all of you. I just… I can't believe that I could forget about you and mom. I should have been there to save all of yo-"
"Shhh, it is okay." He kissed the top of my head just like my mom had in the dark dungeon, "Alex, no one is upset. We have you back and that is all that matters."
"Family is the most important thing." I repeated one of his favorite phrases and wiped the last tear stain off of my left cheek.
"That is right," He laughed gently and took my hand in his. "And it seems like you have created your own unique version."
The laughter escaped my mouth freely and I followed his lead with no hesitation. I couldn't explain how he knew anything about my life, but I pushed the idea that this was far-fetched out of my head and let myself babble on and on about the X-men and my entire life story. He listened attentively and only paused a few times to ask a question or laugh at my description of various X-men.
I told him about waking up in the hospital with Mystique and how I would never have imagined that she was the reason I had gone to Earth. Despite the small worry in the back of my mind that he would find the discussion of life with my Earth family uncomfortable, dad merely nodded his head and said something along the lines that he was grateful that Mystique had been there. She wasn't perfect, he told me, but if she hadn't of cared enough to drag me from the palace grounds I could have been lost that very night.
"So," I broached the subject gently as we reached a lake and sat down on a log close enough that I could stick my feet into the cool water, "Does the fact that you are here mean you really are…"
"Alex, do you remember this place?"
I looked out at the lakeside and spotted a few more mountains and large trees, but nothing looked all that familiar. There were so many forests around Lenox that I assumed it was just another wooded area. I looked back at his face and wondered if he would address my question at all. My siblings hadn't been willing to discuss the logistics of what was going on, but maybe dad would be more willing to tackle the subject.
"No, I guess it is some forest in Lenox. Makes as much sense as anything else…"
"It is whatever you want it to be." He smiled at me and then waved his hand at the lake. Suddenly, the water began to grow in size and the land around our feet changed into the telltale mushiness of wet beach sand.
"Dad are you saying that this is Heaven?" I looked around the new beach scene and could spot my siblings swimming only a ways away in the crystal blue water. "Wait… am I dead?"
Instead of answering my growing list of questions, dad took a slow breath and leaned back on our log. He braced himself with his hands and let the soft ocean breeze drift past his face. Despite the oddness of the whole situation and his confusing words, he seemed to be at ease. It was as if none of them had any form of panic or anxiety in their emotional repertoires.
"Am I dead?" I repeated the question as my own shock began to grow.
He gently touched my hand as it clung to the arm of his shirt, "This is a type of middle ground. The only reason that we are able to see and talk to each other is because your body was so badly injured in the fight against Sunil."
"So," I took a slow breath and kept a hold of his arm to anchor myself, "What happens next?"
"That is up to you." He admitted and looked back out at the ocean and my siblings attempting to playfully dunk Nicholas underwater.
I watched them laugh and play and realized how nice it might be to spend the rest of my life with my family. I had lost so much time with them due to Sunil's actions and now I had the chance to leave behind all of the craziness of the world and spend eternity in peace. It would be more than easy to just let go and join them in the sun and fun.
"You mean, I can stay here with you forever?"
Dad took another slow breath and turned to look at my inquisitive eyes, "If that is what you really want."
"Why wouldn't I want that?" I could feel my body becoming lighter as I began to let go of my hesitations and embrace the idea of abandoning my past. I let go of his arm and dipped my feet back into the water. The warmth was enjoyable and it let my head begin to swim slightly as I slowly lost the urge to think of anything besides my own happiness.
"You know," I smiled at my dad feeling more relaxed than I had in my entire life, "I remember when we used to go and spend two months at the castle by the beach. I always thought if I kept swimming far enough that I would reach the other side of the world."
"I remember that." Dad chuckled and playfully nudged my shoulder; "It wouldn't have been such a bad goal if you had paid more attention to your swimming lessons."
"Yeah, mom was terrified that I would sneak out to the water at night and …"
The idea of my mom brought my attention back to the battle with Sunil and everyone back in the Morph's land. I could picture her worried face staring at me with such pain and love. The image sent a shiver down my back and forced me to sit up straight on the log.
I had been so preoccupied with my own happiness that I hadn't thought about anyone else's feelings. What was going to happen to her if I died? The feeling of floating that had come over me only moments before began to vanish quickly as the faces of my family and friends appeared in my head. If I left her, my mother would be alone in the world. I knew what if felt like to be completely alone and had no desire to put my mother through that pain. She deserved so much more than that, especially from me.
"I can't leave mom," I told him in a soft voice and noticed that he was already watching me closely, "I mean, it is beautiful here and I don't want to lose any of you again, but I just… I can't leave her alone."
"Is that what you really want? You want to go back and live the rest of your life?"
"What I want," I sighed and looked up at his handsome face "Is my family. I just want my family to be together."
"We may not be physically together Alex, but we are always together." He wiped a few strands of hair that had fluttered in front of my eyes and winked at me, "You are stuck with us forever, kiddo."
I laughed gently and playfully poked him with my elbow in the side, "Is that so?"
"Someday," His tone turned more wise and knowing as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders, "Someday my little Alex, we will all be back together. That day will come."
"Do you want me to go back?"
He took a moment and thought about the question. I had the impression that he was determined to see me go back, but I refused to jump to any conclusions. Maybe, he would change his mind and decide that I should stay in his comforting embrace for a while longer.
"You are still so young, Alex." He spoke slowly and firmly, reminding me of his diplomatic skill and his strong love for our family, "You deserve to live your life to the fullest. Make friends, make mistakes, and create a real future for yourself. Nothing would please me more, than to see you someday as a little old woman who made the most of every day she was given."
"It seems strange to go and do all that without any of you there. Nicholas and the girls didn't get the chance to get married or have kids. Why should I get a future if they don't?"
"Life isn't always fair, Alex." He patted my shoulder and stared out at the others for only a moment.
"That's for sure."
"It's true that they didn't get the chance to really experience all that life has to offer, but that doesn't mean that they want you to spend your entire life feeling guilty. They want you to be happy, Alex. Whatever you choose to do, we all want you to be happy."
We sat in silence for a while after that, enjoying the company and silently trying to imagine what life would have been like if my family had been able to live their lives to the fullest. I could picture each of my siblings with careers and kids. They would have made a real difference in the world, if only they had been able to stay. I took a deep breath of salty air and promised myself that I would make each one of them proud. I would live my life for all of them.
As my desire to go back became stronger, I felt myself being pulled from the scene. It was a strange sensation, as if I suddenly had the desire to fall asleep and drift away. I gripped my father's shirt out of fright and he patted my hand comfortingly. I wasn't sure how, but we both seemed to sense that it was almost time to go. My moments with my lost family were almost over, and the idea scared me a little.
"It can't be time already." I said and hugged him tightly once again, "I can't leave now."
He hugged me back and kissed my head sweetly. When I continued to mumble about it being far too early to leave, he held me at arms' length and looked deeply into my eyes. The look in his pair reminded me so much of the feelings I had experienced on the battlefield only a short while ago. Although he wanted me to go and live my life, he was still going to miss our time together. Who knew how long it would be before we could hug each other?
"I think you know in your heart that you are ready my sweet little Alex." He kissed my forehead once more and stumbled over his words slightly as the sadness of the moment began to break his courageous facade, "I am so proud of you."
We stood up from the log as the entire beach scene began to fade into the background and leave the stark white walls around us once again. His warm arms, pulled me in for one final hug that I happily reciprocated as the pulling sensation reminded me that I could not stay.
"I love you, Alexandria." He brushed a piece of hair out my face and slowly let go of my body.
"I love you too, daddy." I responded with a new wave of tears that threatened to escape from my already exhausted eyes.
He stepped back from me and joined my siblings in their little group. I stayed completely still unable to fathom the idea of walking away from them, but my loved ones began to fade away as if they were being slowly pulled away from me. Until they completely vanished from my line of sight, I continued to watch them. Once they were no longer visible even through tightly squinted eyes, I turned my attention back to the confusing maze of white.
I began to slowly walk forward, unsure where I was supposed to go but certain that I had to keep moving onward. Nothing changed in the scenery as I strolled through the maze at a snail's pace. It was completely different then before, when I had felt the comforting embrace of a warm field or peaceful beach. I suddenly had the distinct feeling that I was no longer welcome in this place. I was supposed to be somewhere else.
"You're here!" The sound of Molly's voice brought me out of my funk and forced me to stare ahead at the only thing that wasn't white; a large wooden door with an ornate handle.
I rushed to her and immediately dropped to my knees when I reached her. She smiled happily at me and seemed as relieved as I was to see a friendly face. She held out her hand to me and I found my own automatically reaching for hers. Instead of going right through her like I had before, our hands met in a warm hold that seemed to bind us together somehow. She smiled at me as if she was aware of everything that had happened since our last meeting and patted my cheek with her free hand.
"I guess you get to come with me." I mumbled and managed to stand up while still keeping her hand in mine.
"I am part of you." She said with more wisdom than her years would probably have allowed, "You remember me now."
She had a point there. Ever since the memories floating in the back of my head had been released and reexamined by my brain, I had begun to realize how much effort I had put into imagining Molly. She had been my best friend and constant companion; real or not. She was as much a part of my past as my parents and siblings were.
I reached down and picked her up gently. She wrapped her little arms around my neck and stared at the door. I could see her little face scrunch up into a mix of concern and anxiety. I was almost a full-grown adult but I could honestly say I had the same fears as my imaginary friend. I held her tighter to try and comfort her and remind her that she wasn't alone.
"We are going through there?" She asked shyly.
"We have to go back." I responded and placed a hand on the doorknob, while silently thinking of the irony that I finally had an escape door in Molly world and I wasn't completely sure I wanted to use it.
"What happens now?" She asked as she buried her face in my shoulder.
"We live a long and full life." I told her in a whisper and opened the door to reveal a blast of color and air so powerful that we practically fell over…