Mist of Memories

by HeroR

Guilt, regret, if left alone these feelings will consumed even the strongest of souls. That is the reality the Strawhats face as they go into their captain's memories to save their precious crewmate. To free their captain's from his guilt, they must first understand the depths of his pain and loss.

38. Road to Salvation

Hello, for all those who are still here and alive after last chapter, the answer to last week's cliffhanger will finally be answer. Will Luffy raise above his despair and take his life, or will he raise above it and regained his will to live?

As always, thanks again for all your support. Because of all your support, this story has surpassed the 1.6 thousand review mark. All I can say is thank you to you all and to Cana-Puff and Mon Esprit Libre for checking this chapter.

With that sappiness over, to the chapter.

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Chapter 38: Road to Salvation

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Luffy grabbed the knife's hilt and gently took it from the entity's cold, clothed hand. Carefully, he looked over the blade with morbid interest.

He honestly didn't want to kill himself. The immediate desire to do such a thing passed on this day in Amazon Lily. He found the will to live again when Jimbei reminded him that he still had his crew, who was awaiting his return. That he still had something left to protect.

Still, Luffy found himself considering taking his own life despite himself as he touched the sharp blade, cutting his fingers.

He didn't want to die, not after so many gave up so much to save him back at Marineford. He also didn't want to waste Ace's sacrifice. But, at the same time, he was sick of feeling guilty about what happened to his brother.

He knew it was his fault. That Ace would had never died if he just stood away and put his trust in his brother's crew, just as Ace trusted his crew to protect and care for him. Ace never came running to save him when he was in trouble because Ace had faith in those he chose to sail with him. He should have had the same faith in Ace's friends...no, family. That lack of faith took his brother from him as well as the lives of dozen of others, including Bon Clay. Maybe he did deserve to be miserable.

At the same time, was this really the only way to have peace? He thought he was on the road to recovery. He had gotten stronger after spending over a year in isolation, reunited with his crew, and fought and won against several powerful enemies since entering the New World. He was even gearing up to fight two of the Emperors and had an alliance with Traffy. They were back, fulfilling their dreams and sailing the seas of adventure in the strongest ocean in the world.

But what happened with Toby showed him the harsh, undeniable, truth. Despite everything he had gained, a part of his heart was still frozen in that time from two years ago. He never moved on from Marineford.

If he truly made peace with Ace's death, he would have never been ensnared in that stupid Dream World, or be in this place. He also wouldn't desired that Dream World to the point where a part of him resented his crew for waking him. He knew he did the right thing leaving that fantasy world, but he still deeply missed Ace and Sabo. Those months in that dream were some of his happiest times in his life. He had his family back. It showed him what could have been.

He chose a fantasy over his own crew and made them suffer needlessly. He abandoned them again.

It had been two years since Ace died, why wasn't he better? Why did he still hurt? Why did he still have nightmares and flashbacks of Ace's death? He should be stronger than this. After everyone gave up so much to help him, why wasn't he okay?

What would Ace think if he saw his weakling little brother still crying over his death? What would his crew think if they saw him like this after they gave up two years of their lives to train?

He was truly weak, as weak as he was when he gave up on his ambitions. When he renounced the right to claim the title of Pirate King.

Perhaps it was for the best to end it all here and put everyone out of their misery. How could he properly lead his crew and become the Pirate King and fulfill their dreams if he hurt all the time? Could he even look Shanks in the eye as he was now? He could barely look at his crew without feeling shame at what he had become. He couldn't even fulfill his promise to Ace. His life was already filled with many regrets.

Also, if it was true that couldn't even leave, what was the point of living? He didn't want to see Ace's death, or his crew's deaths by the Baron's hand, forever. It hurt enough the first time. He was...exhausted.

Maybe the truth was that he had already died. That he died back at Marineford with Ace. That all he was now was a shell crawling through life on the empty hope that the sun would return.

That mist creature was right; he was just a burden now. A burden that his crew didn't deserve. They deserved freedom. They deserved to go after their dream without a weak captain frozen in guilt holding them back. He couldn't protect anything the way he was now. They deserved...more than him.

The entity stared triumphantly at the Strawhats as it felt Luffy's anguish overwhelm his soul. "You have failed. Your captain's soul and all of you, belongs to me."

"Don't be so cocky!" Zoro yelled as he viciously attacked the entity. Still, nothing touched it.

Sanji also attempted to kick the creature, but just like Zoro, his efforts were futile.

"Dammit, what is this thing!?" Sanji cursed.

"You still do not get it?" the entity mocked. "On this island, I am a god. You fools should have left when you had the chance. Now, you will share in your captain's fate. In his effort to save you, he will be damning all of you to a fate worse than Hell. Oh, the irony of the anguish he will feel once he realizes the truth makes me shiver." If the creature had a tongue, it would undoubtedly be licking its lips.

"You disgusting little..." Usopp growled as he trembled in rage. This monster was pure evil.

"You think you're so powerful by attacking people when they're at their lowest! That torturing people until they lose their will to live gives you strength!" Nami yelled in anger and disgust. "You're nothing but a sadistic coward!"

The entity chuckled. "What does it matter what an insect like you thinks? All of you will cease to exist and will become a part of the mist."

All the Strawhats growled at the entity.

"I have been enjoying you all since you came here. Your grief, sadness, and regret over not being able to help your captain at Impel Down and Marineford was simply delicious. Your anguish over Sabaody and Omatsuri was also all too delightful. I have never had such an emotional group before in all my centuries. A group that truly loves and cares for one another is extremely rare in these seas. When you hurt one, it causes pain to everyone. I love people like you," the entity continued to tease.

Sanji gritted his teeth as he stared daggers at the entity. "You unredeemable son of a bitch."

"I have to thank that little pipsqueak for bringing me such a wonderful group of souls to feast on," the entity said, taking no mind of Sanji's anger. "So many strong souls at once. I could not ask for more."

"Pipsqueak...you mean that ball of light?" Franky asked as he growled under his breath. "Did that thing lead us into some kind of trap?"

"I have to admit, I was worried for a moment," the entity went on, ignoring Franky's question. "I am not completely sure how you managed to catch up with your captain's soul. This has never happened before, despite his interference. But none of that matters now. Your captain is too broken and weak to hear your voices. He has become so lost in his despair and self-loathing that he has completely closed his mind. When one has lost all hope, they become deaf and blind to everything except their own dark thoughts and feelings. You can only sit here and watch. Everything you have done was for nothing!"

"You're sick," Brook sneered. "Why do you take such delight in tormenting people like this? Were you not once a living being? Only one who once had a heart could drag another person into such darkness."

The entity said nothing.

"What has Luffy-san ever done to you to deserve such agony? Why do you feel the need to punish him!?" Brook demanded.

"I have nothing personal against your captain. You can only blame yourselves for this. You are the ones who allowed such a broken soul to come to this island. If it was not me, something else would had corrupted your captain and pushed him over the edge," the entity said in a calm voice. "The blame lies in all of you for being blind to your captain's pain."

Chopper's eyes widened in horror. "That's…"

"Don't listened to him," Zoro said firmly as he glared at the entity. "He's trying to break us like he did Luffy by pushing all the blame on us!"

The entity chuckled. "Despite all of your crewmates thinking you are dumb and slow, you are actually quite clever, Pirate Hunter."

"Stop trying to change the subject!" Sanji yelled. "Why are you doing this to Luffy!?"

The entity laughed at him. "What does it matters to you when you are about to disappear? With all of your souls added to my power, I will be one step closer to my dream."

"Dream!?" Usopp exclaimed in surprise and shock.

"You mean, you don't eat souls for nutrition? Then why?" Chopper asked in surprise.

Brook scowled at the entity. "You're a ghost. What business do you have with the living?"

The entity did not answer for a moment. It appeared to be in pain by the way the mist around him shifted and swirled. "There is no point telling those who will soon become a part of me. Only pain, misery, and extinction await you. Now, watch as your captain destroys himself. Disappear in despair!"

"You...whatever you are..." Luffy suddenly called.

The entity turned away from the Strawhats and stared at Luffy.

"You...you have my crew's memories… That means...that they're in this mist too?" Luffy asked in an unsteady voice.

"They were," the entity confirmed. He side-eyed the Strawhats before returning his attention to Luffy. "But they escaped. Since they had already conquered their demons and pain, they were able to break the curse of this island and are free to go wherever they please."

"So, they're safe," Luffy said as he sighed in relief. They didn't suffer like he had.

There was a slight pause. "Yes, they are safe."

"That's a lie!" Usopp yelled as he flung his arms at Luffy. "That thing wants all our souls, Luffy! That thing is trying to trick you! Dammit, Luffy, wake up!"

"They are safe because they are stronger than you can ever be. They can face and fight through their battles and not run and hide in a dream," the entity said.

Luffy closed his eyes as held the knife closed to his heart. "What are they doing now?"

There was a slight pause.

"They are waiting around your body. They are waiting for you to wake up. Much like what they did two weeks ago," the entity said as it appeared to close its 'eyes'. "It is quite sad. Your little doctor is trying not to cry as he cares for you. You navigator and sniper are in tears. Your other crewmates are trying to stay strong, but they could only look on helpless. Yes, it is exactly like it was the last time."

Luffy's eyes widened in fear and shame. After what he saw, he never wanted to put his crew through such heartache ever again.

"Dammit, Luffy, it's lie!" Sanji screamed at Luffy. "We're right here!"

Luffy twirled the knife. "If I die here...will I die in real life?"

"Yes," the entity answered, attempting to hide its eagerness. "If you continue to live, they will wait on this island until your body eventually waste away because you are too weak to escape and shoulder the burden of your guilt. Going on means accepting and living with the fact that you killed your brother, Bon Clay, failed your crew in every possible way, and will eventually destroy them because of your arrogance and selfishness. If you can handle that then, by all means, leave and go kill your crew."

Luffy flinched at the word. Still, he hesitated.

The entity seemed a little annoyed. It obviously expected Luffy not to have any fight left.

"There is another option," the entity suddenly said, getting Luffy's attention.

Luffy looked up at the entity.

"You can live, return to your crew, and then step down from being captain and leave the crew," the entity said.

"Step down?" Luffy repeated.

"Yes, leave your crew and allow them to remain together and fulfill their dreams. However, if you do take this step, you know what kind of future awaits you," the entity said softly.

Luffy breathed heavily and shivered as he realized what the entity was going to say.

The entity appeared to be smiling. "You will be…alone."

Luffy stopped breathing when he heard that cold, hateful word.

"You bastard…" Zoro hissed. They all knew how Luffy feared that word.

"You will be by yourself in this big world. Never allowed to make friends or form a new crew because you will eventually lead them to their deaths in your selfishness and arrogance," the entity went on.

Luffy froze in place. It was like the entity had stabbed him in the face.

"So, what choice do you take? Living a lonesome life, or end it here? Those are the only two right choices you can make for your 'precious' crew. Those are the only two choices you can make to redeem yourself for all the misery you have caused," the entity said. "What will it be?"

Luffy snapped out of his trance and turned his eyes towards the knife. His eyes hardened as he came to his decision. His body stopped shaking and he had an almost serene look on his face. He seemed relaxed and almost relieved.

Robin's eyes widened in horror. She knew that expression. She went through the same thing two years ago. The feeling of relief and peace that overwhelmed her when she accepted her death in Alabasta and Enies Lobby. To know that her nightmare was finally coming to an end, even if it was by the bleakness and finality of death.

"Luffy, stop!" Robin screamed desperately at her captain, startling her crewmates. She very rarely sounded like that. She sounded panicked and closed to tears.

Luffy got into a kneeling position and held the knife like he was preparing to plunge it into his chest.

Now, all the Strawhats were in panic mode.

The entity appeared to be smiling. "Good, Strawhat. End it here and free yourself and your crew from your guilt."

Luffy stared at the knife with an intense expression. "I have only one request. If I do this, you mustn't touch my crew. You feed on misery, right?"

This took the entity off-guard.

"Let them leave this island in peace," Luffy said. "Please…don't take advantage of them."

The entity stood quiet for several seconds. "You have my word. I will not touch your crew."

"You lying son of a bitch!" Sanji screamed in fury.

The entity side-eyed Sanji. "It is no lie. I will not touch you." It appeared to smirk. "It is your own captain who is damning you."

Robin narrowed her eyes as hatred burn within them. "How dare you take advantage of Luffy's heart this way!"

The entity just snickered.

Luffy closed his eyes and raised the knife.

"Luffy, please stop!" Brook pleaded as he attempted to reach for his captain. His hand passed through Luffy. "Killing yourself won't bring you the relief you desire! It will only bring more despair!"

"It's not what your brother would have wanted!" Franky screamed at his captain. "He died so you could live! Don't let this bastard twist that act of love into something evil!"

"Luffy, stop it! We don't want you to die! We would never be happy if you weren't by our side!" Chopper screamed in tear-filled panic.

"Dammit, Luffy, don't you understand! Our dreams, our ambitious would be worthless if you give up! What happened to Ace wasn't your fault! What Bon Clay did also wasn't your fault! They both made their own choices about their lives! Stop punishing yourself for others' decisions!" Usopp yelled as he tried to snatch the knife from Luffy.

Luffy wasn't listening as he prepared himself, taking several deep breaths.

"Luffy, snap out of it!" Nami shouted at her captain. She was in tears. If only she could just touch him, she could smack some sense into him. "You can't leave us like this! Not after everything we've faced together! It wouldn't make us happy to lose you! It would be the same if you abandoned us!"

"Dammit Luffy, you're not this weak!" Zoro yelled harshly. "Don't tell me you have forgotten about us again and bought into this entity's lies!? Goddammit Luffy, you can't just throw away everything you've gained! If you do, that would be truly selfish!"

"Stop being so selfish, you shitty rubber-brain bastard! Do you really think we would be happier if you go and kill yourself like this, shit captain!?" Sanji shouted angrily. "What were those two years for if you're just going to end it this way!?"

Luffy couldn't hear any of them as his resolved hardened. He slowly closed his eyes. "Ace, Sabo... Zoro, Nami, Usopp, Sanji, Chopper, Franky, Brook...I'm sorry. I...I'm not strong enough to shoulder this anymore. I'm too weak to protect anyone...not even myself. Please, reach for your dreams without me holding you back anymore. Ace...I'm sorry that you died protecting a weakling brother like me and that I can't keep my promise." His thoughts reverberated through the mist, allowing all the Strawhats to hear them. "Still...I wish I could hear their voices...just one last time. Just one more time, I want to hear my crew's voices…"

With that thought, Luffy's eyes tightened as he ready the knife. Despite his resolve, his hands were trembling.

"LUFFY!" all the Strawhats screamed at once with all their hearts. Their voices rumbled across the landscape like thunder.

Luffy's eyes suddenly snapped opened, startling them.

"What are you doing?" the entity asked impatiently.

Luffy looked around the misty forest. He had a shock expression on his face and he was breathing hard. "Just...just now... I thought I heard my crew calling me."

"What...?" the entity hissed in disbelief. "That is impossible."

"He heard us!" Usopp yelled happily, tears of relief running down his face. They still had a chance.

"But how!?" Nami asked in bewilderment, shaking in shock. "Why so sudden?"

"Who cares," Zoro said as his hope returned. "We can finally reach Luffy."

"Through those trees…I hear my crew…" Luffy said slowly, not seeming to believe himself.

"What you are hearing is just an echo in your own memory. There is no one else here except us," the entity said in a dismissive tone as it regained its demeanor. Its eyes, however, glared at the Strawhats. "How did you...?"

"Don't listen to that shit head!" Sanji screamed, ignoring the death glare the entity was giving them. "It's us, Luffy!"

Luffy looked in the direction of his crew in confusion. "I'm sure it came from there." He saw nothing but mist, however. Had he truly gone insane?

"He can hear us, but not see us," Chopper observed as he waved his hooves in Luffy's face. He didn't even blink.

"Are you that desperate to believe that your crew is nearby?" the entity asked in a taunting voice, choosing to ignore the Strawhats. "No one is here with you. You are alone in this place."

Luffy winced and tightened his hold on the knife.

"You are never alone," Robin said at her captain.

"And you shall remain and deserve to be alone, trapped within this mist with nothing but your memories and broken promises," the entity went on, ignoring Robin. "Even if you somehow managed to escape and leave behind your guilt, you will eventually fail your crew again, just as you have failed your brother. When that happens, what will become of you, Strawhat Luffy?"

Luffy couldn't answer.

"You will be completely alone in this world," the entity answered for Luffy. "An outcast, hated and rejected by society just as you were when you were a kid. You will wonder the sea alone for an eternity without anyone caring whether you live or die. That is what your future holds because your arrogance will eventually kill everything you hold dear, just as it killed the brother you claim to love. Only by dying here can you spare your crew and yourself such a miserable fate."

Luffy said nothing as he lowered his eyes.

"Then again, maybe you want to live, go back to your crew, and continue to be that selfish boy who destroys everything he touches. It certainly would be in your character," the entity mocked. "So what if you become the Pirate King with the blood of your friends on your hands?"

Luffy sucked in his breath as he stared at one of his palms. He was half-expecting to see Ace's blood on them again.

"Stop telling him lies!" Zoro screamed angrily. Dammit, what he wouldn't give to kill this asshole, even if it was already dead.

"That's...Zoro's voice," Luffy muttered dully. This couldn't all be in his mind, could it?

"Yes, it's me, Luffy!" Zoro yelled at his captain. "We're all here! That thing is manipulating you!"

The entity laughed. "It seems your grief has truly driven you insane, Strawhat Luffy. Listening to voices, you are even more pathetic than I thought. Then again, madness will happen once you stay here long enough."

"Shut up, already!" Nami yelled at the entity before turning her attention back towards her captain. "Luffy, we are all here. We...we saw everything."

Luffy's eyes widened. "Everything...?"

"From the beginning to here, we saw all your struggles, triumphs, and pain," Usopp continued. "We understand how hurt you are about Ace's death and your guilt that you couldn't save us at Sabaody." He paused for a second. "You also feel guilty for getting us killed on that party island."

"Usopp…" Luffy whispered in horror. He was sweating hard now. "You saw..."

"It is all in your mind," the entity said forcibly, becoming angry for the first time.

"That entity showed you your past in an effort to break you, Luffy," Robin said. "It wants you to kill yourself so it can take your soul. What it is promising you will not bring peace, but complete extinction."

"What?" Luffy asked softly. He was utterly lost.

The entity snorted. "Even if that was true, is complete extinction really so terrible? Would feeling nothing be better than feeling constant, endless pain as guilt ripped your soul apart?"

"The pain doesn't have to be endless," Brook countered. "It does hurt. It hurts for a long time, but things can and do eventually get better. Especially, with the help and care of one's family."

Luffy said nothing for several seconds. "When? When does it get better!? It has been two years! It hurts...it hurts so much more than when Sabo died. It hurts so bad that...that I thought I was dying." He paused for several seconds. "For a while, I thought I was okay... I thought I could handle it and move on, but the pain keeps coming back! I keep seeing Ace die... I keep hurting! Maybe it will never go away! Maybe I'll cling to my brothers forever just as I did in that dream. Maybe it was better if I'd never woken from Toby's power or died at Marineford! At least that way I wouldn't be dragging down people with me."

"You don't believe that," Sanji said in a firm voice. "That's your guilt talking."

"Luffy, please come back! We all miss you!" Chopper yelled in tears. "This creature has been filling you with vicious lies! You can never be a burden to us!"

"Have I said anything that was not true?" the entity asked Luffy casually. "Did you not become arrogant because of all your past victories, which was why you fearlessly punched a Celestial Dragon, which brought down the wrath of the gods upon your head and nearly killed the crew you say you love? Did you not trust your brother's crew to save him and thought you could do it alone? What would you call that if not arrogance, or outright stupidity?"

"Those are all half-truths," Robin said calmly, but nothing could hide her anger at the creature. "We all became arrogant from what we achieve together. It was not just Luffy."

"We all underestimated the power of the World Government despite knowing how dangerous the admirals were from our run-in with Aokiji," Sanji said with a hint of shame. "Maybe we could have planned things better, but even if I had died that day, I would have never hated you for punching that asshole noble."

Zoro nodded as he touched the hilt of one of his swords. "As I said then, I would have cut him if you hadn't acted."

"You saved Hatchi and Camie's lives!" Chopper yelled. "That's nothing to be ashamed of!"

"Zoro, Sanji, Chopper..." Luffy whispered.

"Two lives for price of your entire crew, sounds fair," the entity mocked.

"All life is precious!" Chopper growled. "I would have never forgiven myself if Hatchi and Camie were made to suffer because they tried to help us! I'm glad Luffy stood his ground and punched that damn noble! I would expect no less from my captain!"

Luffy looked close to tears hearing this.

"Is your imagination always this active?" the entity humored. "What excuse did your mind come up with to justify you going to war?"

Zoro growled at the entity, but wasted no time address it. "Those are also half-truths. I've seen your memories, Luffy, and I know you. You didn't go to Impel Down and Marineford because you were on some ego trip or any of that shit. You went to those places because you truly wanted to save your brother! You cared for his safety and life more than your own."

"You loved Ace and he loved you! That's why he died happy, knowing that he protected you!" Nami yelled at her captain.

"Someone is happy to die for a fool?" the entity asked coldly.

"He had a smile on his face and died with no regrets," Sanji said with a note of sadness and pride.

"You also didn't fail to save Ace!" Nami yelled. "You saved him from the marines and allowed him to spend his final moments as a free man! He didn't die because the marines executed him. He died because he chose to save something more precious than his own life!"

Luffy's eyes suddenly narrowed as he glared at the place where his crew spoke. "Don't you get it!? If you really saw everything, then you should know I didn't want Ace to save me!"

Luffy's sudden burst of anger startled Nami.

"I wanted him to escape and live!" Luffy yelled at the mist as he got to his feet. "He shouldn't have wasted a thought saving a weakling like me! I should have died...not him!" He began to tremble, but he refused to let himself cry. "All my life…Ace had taken care of me. The one time I could repay him...to save him for once...he had to give everything up saving me because..." He sobbed despite his efforts to control his tears. Tears pooled onto the forest's floor as Luffy fell back to his knees. "I...I've failed so many people."

The entity nodded in agreement. "Indeed. If you truly saw his memories, then you must have seen how Bon Clay threw away his life and freedom for nothing because of this boy. He only had one request, and Strawhat couldn't even do that right. Not to mention the countless criminals Strawhat carelessly released during his failed raid." He glanced at Luffy. "What kind of trouble do you think Sir Crocodile has gotten himself into since he has been free? Maybe he went back to Alabasta and killed your dear friend Vivi along with her family."

Luffy visibly paled at the thought.

"You little..." Franky growled, ready to punch the entity across the afterlife.

"You all are being especially cruel, making him live with such guilt. Can you not see the pain he has been left in because of his sins?" the entity said as it turned towards Luffy. "Such selfish words cannot be the voices of your real crew, Strawhat."

Luffy stared blankly at the ground, considering the entity's words.

"You're the one being needlessly cruel," Brook growled at the entity.

"Besides, the choice to free Crocodile wasn't Luffy's and you know it! It was Iva's idea to free that bastard!" Usopp yelled in anger. "Even with that, Crocodile helped Luffy countless times in both Impel Down and Marineford. He even saved Luffy's life from Akainu. I still don't like the guy, but we owe that sandy croc one. He, among many others, helped bring Luffy back to us!"

"And it was Ace's choice to die," Franky said as he looked down at his captain. "Luffy, I know what it's like to feel guilty over someone's death! My mentor was taken away, left to rot and be tortured in prison before being killed because of me. I felt nothing but endless guilt over it to the point that my life stopped until I finally learned to forgive myself. And that's what you must do now, bro! You must forgive yourself and know that it wasn't your fault."

"Forgive?" Luffy whispered as he lowered his eyes.

"It's hard," Nami admitted. "It may take a long time, but we can help. You just can't give up on life, or on us. Not when there is still so much happiness in the future. Good things will come your way, as long as you continue to live."

Luffy looked in the direction of his crew again. He took several deep breaths. "You...you all not angry for what happened at Sabaody and...Omatsuri? You're not mad that I chose to save Ace instead of going out to find you?"

Zoro had to fight back a snort. "If I was angry, I would tell you, moron. Do you really think I would follow an incompetent captain?"

"We wouldn't have trained and come back if we were mad or thought you were a burden," Sanji added cockily. "I would have hated you if you did nothing after that shitty noble tried to buy Camie-chan."

Luffy stared blankly into the mist. His body trembled as he took in his crew's words.

"And we understand why you wanted to rescue Ace over reuniting with us," Nami said in a gentle voice as she recalled the memories they saw of Luffy and Ace. "He was your brother, caregiver, and best friend. What kind of heartless person wouldn't have rushed to their loved one's rescue if they knew there was no chance for them to escape death? What you did at Impel Down and Marineford wasn't selfish or arrogant, but the ultimate showcase of love."

"You went to Hell and back! You lost ten years of your life and was still willing to move even when you were dying of poison!" Franky yelled, trying to get through to Luffy. "You went into a war zone knowing that you were outmatched and still wanted to keep going to the point where you were dying! How the hell was any of that selfish!?"

"He should have left it in the hands of his brother's crew," the entity said forcibly. "They were more than capable in saving their own crewmate without some upstart rookie complicating things."

"Maybe so. Maybe they didn't need Luffy-san," Brook said as he coldly glare at the entity. "But Luffy-san was Ace's brother before he was theirs. Luffy-san had every right to be there and was willing to die on that battlefield to save his brother. If it was reverse, Ace would have done the same for Luffy and we would have welcomed his help." He pointed his sword at the entity. "You are twisting everything Luffy-san and Ace have done for each other and turning it into something wicked." He looked directly at his captain. "Luffy-san, you're allowing this creature to turn Ace into an evil spirit that is destroying your soul and defiling his sacrifice!"

Luffy was left speechless.

"Ace wouldn't have wanted this, Luffy-san. He would have wanted you to move on and achieve your dreams, not to be a means used to destroy you," Brook said in a gentler voice.

"I know that!" Luffy yelled in frustration. "After what happened a couple of weeks ago...don't you think I'm know that!?" He teared up again, but he refused to allow any tears to fall. "I...I...I'm just tired of feeling hurt... I want this pain, this emptiness, this...guilt to just go away!"

"And you can have that if you use that knife," the entity said with some heat. "Sitting here arguing with yourself achieves nothing. Give yourself the peace you so want and end it all."

"And what about us?" Zoro suddenly asked. "Are you that willing to just leave us like this?"

Luffy turned towards the voice of his swordsman. "Zoro?"

"Have you just forgotten about us!? We've all been through what you're going through!" Zoro yelled, becoming angrier. "We've all suffered pain, regret, and doubt in ourselves. Did you forget that Robin lost all desire to even live before she came to us!? Did you forget that Brook spent fifty years lost in a damn fog after he had lost his entire crew and then had his shadow stolen!? Dammit Luffy, we understand pain! If you needed help, you just had to ask!"

"I'm the captain!" Luffy yelled firmly as he slammed his fists into the ground. "A captain must always be strong. A captain must never show weakness, no matter how heavy the burden becomes. You said so yourself! That if I fell apart, who could you depend on!?"

"Bullshit!" Sanji yelled. "You may be our captain, but you're a still a human! Did you think we would think less of you because you say you're hurt!?"

Luffy looked ready to argued further.

"Did you know, Luffy, that we all attempted to rush to see you after we heard what had happened?" Robin suddenly asked, catching Luffy's attention. "We all wanted to be there for you because we knew you were hurt. We wanted to make sure you were not alone in this."

"You helped us so much, Luffy, and we weren't there when you needed us," Nami said as she choked back some tears. "Do you know the guilt we all felt because of that? Do you know how bad we felt that you lost so much while we remained unaware of anything? You went through hell, and we knew nothing."

"But we're here now and we know!" Chopper yelled. "We can help you get through this."

"Because we're your family, remember!? And families help each other! You don't ever need to be ashamed of asking us for help!" Usopp shouted.

"It isn't just you protecting all of us," Franky said. "It's about all of us protecting one another. So, don't you dare give up on life or us!"

"It does get better, Luffy," Robin said. "For a long time, I believed that the pain from my past would never go away, which was why I was willing to give myself to the government in order to save all of you. I know of the false peace you feel at the thought of dying. It was only thanks to all of you that I finally began to heal. Now, my past does not trouble me anymore. It still hurts at times, but I am able to see my future for the first time in a long time."

Luffy stared at what he still saw as nothingness. His breaths suddenly came out as harsher puffs and he bent over in what appeared to be pain.

The entity stared at Luffy. Something had changed. "What is the matter, Strawhat?"

"Luffy?" Chopper asked in concern as he walked towards his captain. What he wouldn't give to touch him.

"For so long, I felt guilty for letting Ace die. I always wondered if, had I never been there, would he have lived? If I had minded my own business and listened to everyone, would he still be alive?" Luffy sobbed brokenly. "Since that day, I felt like I should have died. When I was on that island that Rayleigh left me on, I wondered why I was the one left alive. Ace had so many friends trying to save him…and his father died to rescue him…so why did he throw it all away to save a weakling like me?"

It was terrible for the Strawhats to see and hear Luffy like this. They hated hearing him talk about wanting death. His will to live was so great that he could survive even the most hopeless situations. To continuously hear from his own mouth that he had lost his desire to live was like breaking the natural law. Luffy was their rock, their guiding light. For him to fall like this...

Perhaps that was why Luffy hid his pain all this time. Luffy knew how important he was to the stability and morality of the crew. He was their captain, so he had to be strong and firm for them, just as he was when he was forced to let go of Usopp. He wasn't allowed to show weakness, no matter how much he hurt.

Luffy took several deep breaths as he continued. "It was only my desire to become stronger to protect and see all of you again that kept me going during those days after the war. If it wasn't for that...I might have gone insane and done something bad to myself. Even now, I wonder if I can protect all of you. I swore I would protect everything when Sabo died, and I've failed. What...what happens if I fail again and you all perish for real? I don't want all of you to die because of me, like Ace. Just the thought of it is...unbearable. I would rather die here than allow anyone to suffer for my sake!"

"Luffy, is that your true fear and guilt?" Zoro asked gently. "That you will fail us?"

Luffy said nothing, but Zoro knew by his captain's silence that he had hit the real source of his problem.

Luffy wasn't just frozen in guilt and regret about what happened to his brother. He was deathly afraid of failing and history repeating itself. That he would eventually let them down and get them killed saving him like Ace, leaving him completely alone in the world. What happened to Ace and Sabo were the sums of all of Luffy's worse fears.

Luffy had proven several times through his actions that he never feared his own demise. If he died protecting and saving his friends, or just chasing his dream, he would go to the next world with a huge smile and no regret. It was the deaths of those around him that terrified him.

"If we do end up with the same fate as Ace, I would see it as an honor," Brook said. "Ace died a noble death."

"I don't want anyone to die saving me!" Luffy screamed angrily as he slammed his fists into the ground. "I'm your captain! It's me who is supposed to die for you! If my death means all of you are safe and allowed to continued towards your dreams, then I would do it!"

"That isn't your choice, Luffy," Franky said firmly. "If we die protecting one another, that's our business. Death happens, and it sucks when it does, but one can't live in fear of what ifs. You know this already, Luffy. That's the life of a pirate!"

Luffy glared in the direction of Franky. "Dammit, I do know that!"

"You may know it and accept it, but you've allowed your brother's death to stunt you," Franky countered harshly. "Don't you think we would be hurt too if you died saving all of us!? Do you know how much like shit we would had felt like if it was you who died during that damn war!? Do you actually believe that we could just go back on the Sunny and continue our journey like nothing happened!? This works both ways!"

Luffy was taken aback by Franky's words.

"In a piece of your soul, Luffy, time stopped when Ace died. But you have to get it moving again," Nami said in a gentle tone. "We may all die on you, but remember what your brothers told you in your Dream World. Even in death, you're never alone."

"And that we can never hate or blame you if we do get killed," Usopp said. "We all accepted the life of a pirate. We know that we can die at any time. It wouldn't be worth going to sea if we didn't go on crazy and life threatening adventures. I mean, you said it yourself: part of the fun of being a pirate is the unpredictability of tomorrow."

Luffy lowered his head and sobbed harder, but there was something different about it.

"Why bother with echoes in your own mind?" the entity asked with a note of impatience. "If you desire peace, kill yourself already and be done with it."

Luffy continued to cry. "I...I don't know what's wrong with me. Nothing changed. Ace and Sabo are gone, and I'm still afraid of failing my crew, but...I can't stop...crying...in happiness."

The entity was surprise to hear this. "Happiness? What are you happy about?"

"Even...even if this is all in my head...even if I have gone crazy...my crew came to me when I'm unable to save myself again," Luffy sobbed. "They've done so much for me...and here I am sitting in self-pity. They...went through so much worse than me and they got back up...and here I am sobbing like a crybaby... I really haven't changed."

"That's not true," Usopp said as he knelt by his friend. He looked ready to put his arms around his captain. "It's okay to cry. Especially after everything you went through. You don't have to be strong for us all the time. You're allowed to weak in front of us."

Luffy looked at the knife in his hand as he slowly sat up. It looked like he had forgotten he was holding it. "For the first time in two years...I feel...I feel like...maybe things will get better..."

"You're being too hopeful," the entity said with a hint of annoyance. "Do you really think the guilt in your heart will just go away because you listened to a hallucination? You are destined to be alone, forever lost in the darkness of your own regret. Do you not see how hopeless your life is?"

Luffy smiled as he wiped away his remaining tears. "Maybe what you say is true... Maybe I am hopeless, arrogant, and selfish. But as long as my crew remains by my side, even if it's only in my head, then...I can deal with that." He stared down at the knife and squeezed the handle tightly.

"Get rid of that cursed thing and be done with that bastard!" Zoro yelled.

The entity stared at Luffy, its expression seemingly blank.

"Looks like you're the one who has failed," Brook told the entity coldly. "You underestimated the power of life."

The entity still said nothing, but it still appeared strangely calm as the mist grew thicker around it.

The creature's serene demeanor unnerved Robin. It was defeated, yet it was not upset. Were they missing something?

The entity suddenly began to chuckle. "Well, before you make any final decisions, Strawhat, I have one last memory that I wish to share with you."

Luffy stared at the entity, along with the Strawhats.

"What's he up to now?" Usopp growled.

"What memory can it possibly show Luffy?" Nami said as dread built in her stomach.

They have seen pretty much everything and she couldn't think of anything that could have happened when Luffy was training or after they reunited that would cause him grief. Maybe losing to Caesar, but she highly doubt it. It couldn't be a bluff. That entity was far too smug for that.

The entity's white eyes glowed in the dark light of the mist. "Tell me, Strawhat Luffy, have you ever wonder what happened at Thriller Bark after you lost consciousness?"

Luffy was taken off-guard by the question. "Thriller Bark?"

Zoro paled and felt his mouth go dry. It was going to show Luffy.

Robin, Sanji, and Brook were also distress as they realized what the entity had planned.

The remaining Strawhats also became pallid, although not for the same reason.

"That bastard...he's going to show Luffy that..." Sanji whispered in dismay. If Luffy saw what happened at Thriller Bark in his current mental state, it would destroy everything they've done to save him.

"I know what happened. Kuma came," Luffy answered as he got over his confusion. "What does that have to with anything?"

The entity chuckled. "You poor, naive child. Allow me to show you what happened after you defeated the Warlord Gekko Moriah."

"That bastard!" Zoro yelled. "He's using our memories again!"

Now, he was afraid. He knew what memory that entity was going to show his captain. Luffy was about to see something that he was never meant to see. The memories of what happened with Toby nearly crushed their captain. If he saw the deal he made with Kuma...

Without waiting for Luffy to take or reject its offer, the scene of Amazon Lily faded into the mist. When the mist reformed, they were back at Thriller Bark.

Luffy had also changed with the memory. He was no longer the half-dead man from two years ago. He looked exactly as he did before the Strawhats went into his memories. Although, Luffy's eyes were still slightly void and his mental state was obviously not completely stable.

"Why did you bring me back here?" Luffy asked, completely lost. He was still holding the knife.

"Be silent and watch," the entity said calmly as he pointed towards the scene playing before them.

Luffy looked to see his crew fighting Kuma. They were losing badly.

None of them, not even Zoro, could touch the Warlord because of his strange but powerful Devil Fruit. Everything they threw at him was deflected, and to make matters worse, everyone was worn out from their battle with Oars and Moriah. Although the Rolling Pirates were unharmed and fresh, they stood no chance against the Warlord. Several of them went down with one paw cannon.

Sanji was the only one able to land a solid hit on Kuma and he nearly broke his leg for his efforts.

To Luffy, it was exactly like Sabaody. He could only watch helplessly as his crew fought a hopeless battle.

He glanced at his past self and saw that he was lying limp on a stone slab that was adjusted to act as a bed. Despite all the chaos going on around his past self, he didn't even twitch.

He knew he would be like this after he defeated Moriah, but he felt sick nonetheless that his crew was fighting and getting hurt and he was aware of none of it. He also didn't like that Franky and Robin had stationed themselves the closest to him. They were undoubtedly acting as a last line of defense to protect him against the Warlord.

"That shitty bastard," Sanji growled under his breath. He was shaking badly as he was forced to relive this moment. He should have expected that shitty entity to have one last trump card. He should have seen this coming after that entity showed Luffy their memories from just two weeks ago.

Kuma glanced at the exhausted pirates with a neutral expression. He gave a soft sigh. "As I figured. Getting rid of you all in your injured state is not fair at all. The government ordered me to completely obliterate you, but..."

Instead of finishing the sentence, he raised both arms into the air and created a giant paw bubble.

"What in the world is that?" one of the Rolling Pirates asked, baffled.

"Air? Is he making a giant air bubble with his paws?" Nami in the memory asked in wonder.

"It keeps getting smaller and smaller," Chopper in the memory noted in concern.

Luffy had no idea what was going on. The other Strawhats remembered all too well what happened.

The process was a fairly long, but no one moved to stop Kuma. It was because no one could do anything anyway to stop the Warlord, even if both of his hands were full. They also weren't sure what he was doing and if it was a good idea to interrupt him.

Nami in the memory gasped as she realized what was happening. "He's using his repulsion ability to make a gigantic ball of air, but he's compressing it so much!"

"If all of that air pressure were to suddenly expand, it would create a massive shockwave. It would turn into a bomb!" Robin in the memory explained in fear.

"A bomb!?" Luffy repeated in shock.

"Simplified, the Warlord Bartholomew Kuma is creating an air bomb that will most likely wipe out everything on this ship," the entity explained nonchalantly. "Nasty ability."

Luffy gritted his teeth as he watched helplessly. He tightly clenched his fists and appeared ready to run in and stop Kuma.

The entity seemed to smirk at the rubberman. "This is a memory. There is nothing you can do to change anything. These events have already happened."

Luffy hissed under his breath and trembled in anger.

The paw bubble got smaller until it was only the size of a bowling ball. It kept getting smaller.

"Bomb!?" Usopp in the memory exclaimed in terror. "Are you telling me he's making a bomb!?"

"Boooomb!?" Brook shouted in horror.

After a few more seconds, the air bubble was so compressed that it fit into Kuma's hands. Everyone stared at him in horror, knowing there would be no place to run if he released that air bubble.

Kuma turned to address the pirates. "I will spare your lives."

Luffy was taken off-guard by the declaration. He knew Kuma was a good guy, but why make an air bomb if he had no intention of using it?

The Strawhats closely watched their captain's face.

"We're all watching the same memory, yet Luffy still can't see us," Chopper observed.

"We must still be in a different pocket," Robin said in thought. "We all are sharing the same memory, but we are in a different planes of existence."

"How is that even possible?" Nami asked.

Franky snorted. "Who knows anything about how this crazy mist works."

While they were talking, the pirates who heard Kuma's proclamation sighed in relief. They looked ready to cheer. The Strawhats in the memory eyed the Warlord suspiciously.

"If, in exchange, you will give me the head of Strawhat Luffy," Kuma stated, stopping the celebration cold. All the pirates looked at Kuma as if he was crazy.

Luffy's mouth dropped in shock. His crew never told him about any of this.

The Strawhats' reactions in the memory varied from shock, to annoyance, to outright anger. Luffy knew by their expressions what their answer would be.

"If I return with his head, the government will not complain," Kuma went on, ignoring all the death glares he was receiving.

It took Luffy a moment to find his voice as he considered the deal that Kuma was offering his crew and the Rolling Pirates. "You know, that...that's a good trade."

"You would think that, Luffy!" Usopp yelled harshly at his captain.

"One man's life for that of an entire crew and its allies, more than fair. Bartholomew Kuma was very generous with his offer," the entity agreed. "If you were conscious, would you not have taken his deal?"

"Of course I would!" Luffy shouted, outraged that the entity had even ask such a question. "If my life would have spared my crew, of course I would give myself to Kuma!"

"Good thing you weren't awake," Nami said almost dryly.

The other Strawhats nodded in agreement.

There was a long silence in the memory as everyone stared at Kuma. What surprised Luffy was that all the Rolling Pirates were also glaring defiantly at Kuma. They weren't happy about the deal at all. It was almost like Kuma had asked for their captain's life.

"You're asking us to betray our friend?" Usopp in the memory hissed in a harsh voice as he glared daggers at the towering Warlord.

Luffy had never heard that tone from the sniper before. Even when they had their duel, Usopp never sounded like that. As fierce as that duel was, despite all the harsh words and vicious blows, Usopp was on the verge of tears throughout the entire fight. Here, his tone was a mix of outrage and anger. Usopp was truly pissed.

Even the normally timid Chopper stared fiercely at Kuma without a shred of fear. Luffy could see the fur stand up on his back, making him look almost wild despite being in his Brain Point.

Nami, who had a history of betraying people in the past for her own survival and self-interest, stared blankly at Kuma. There were also no signs of fear or hesitation in her face. Only a cold fury that was so rarely seen.

Robin was much the same as Nami. If she could, Luffy knew she would have used her ability to break the Warlord in half.

Brook, who wasn't even part of his crew yet, looked like he wanted charge and stab Kuma in the face. As far as Luffy could remember, he had never seen the skeleton swordsman so angry.

Zoro and Sanji both had blank expressions, but Luffy could feel their rage.

Franky was grinning, but it wasn't a friendly or cocky grin. It was a grin he usually gave just before he unleashed hell on somebody. When he thought about it, it was the same grin he gave just before they fought in Water 7.

"Come. Bring Strawhat to me," Kuma ordered nonchalantly.

Even with the threat of a bomb going off and killing all of them, everyone had their answer before Kuma even finished his sentence.

"HELL NO!" everyone shouted at once. Their refusal echoed across Thriller Bark and the memory.

Luffy was left dumbfounded, especially by the Rolling Pirates. Every last one of them had shouted "no" along with his crew. Not a single person, people that they met not even an hour ago, considered selling him out. After spending years locked in darkness by one Warlord, they were willing to give their lives for him. They, more or less, had all given Kuma the collective middle finger.

Luffy was nearly moved to tears despite himself. "You guys..."

Kuma face was unreadable as he stared at the pirates. "That is a shame." With that, he released his air bubble and everything was blown away in a huge explosion.

"Everyone!" Luffy shouted in dismay as he watched in horror as his crew and the Rolling Pirates be blown off their feet, thrown into the air, and then slammed into the ground with debris falling on top of them.

The memory shook violently as the person who was experiencing this moment was thrown.

The blast was so sudden and powerful that it was amazing that no one was killed. If Kuma wanted to, he could have easily wiped out every living thing on the ship with that technique.

Luffy balled his fists in helpless anger. Dammit, why did they have to do this? This all could have been settled with his life. What was the point of protecting him if they were all dead?

The Strawhats cringed as they watched their younger selves fly like rag dolls across the broken pirate ship. This was not one of their fondest memories. Nonetheless, they all stood proudly as they watched themselves protect their captain. Luffy may have hated it, but they would all do it again in a heartbeat.

If Luffy had been awake and willing to give his life to Kuma, they would have knocked their rubber idiot of a captain out before he could do it. He wouldn't even have the time to give the order before they'd done it, too. Luffy thought too little about his own life.

Despite looking like everyone was knocked out, the memory kept going, although it was a little on the foggy side, like the person experiencing the memory was half-awake. Fast and harsh breaths could also be heard in the background along with the pounding of a heartbeat. Whoever the watcher was, they were critically wounded.

For the Strawhats who weren't in the know about what happened to Zoro, they half-expected to see Kuma leave, thinking he had killed or at least disable everyone. They did wonder, however, whose memory they were experiencing. As far as they knew, everyone was rendered unconscious from the explosion.

The ones who did know the truth, however, dreaded what they were about to see. How would the crew respond to what Zoro did? More importantly, how would Luffy react given his fragile mental state?

Zoro could only growl as he watched Kuma slowly move through the rubble with deliberate steps towards his prey, certain that there was no left.

He wanted no one to know. He wanted to take all of this to his grave. He knew the guilt that Luffy would feel over what he had done, but it was out of his hands now. That damn entity had to play this as its final card.

Kuma kept walking until he stopped in front of a large piece of rubble. Next to the debris was an unconscious Luffy. He was unharmed in the blast thanks to his rubber body. Despite taking no damage, he was still completely dead to the world, unaware of anything. Kuma's bomb didn't stir him from his slumber.

The memory suddenly became vivid again and the heartbeats speeded up. The breathing of the person experiencing the memory also became faster and choked.

Those little details, however, mattered little to half of the Strawhats.

"What, Kuma was still after Luffy!?" Usopp exclaimed in shock and horror as Kuma used his powers to knocked the rubble blocking Luffy out of the way.

"Luffy's going to get captured!" Chopper yelled in panic.

"This…this can't be right," Franky said, completely lost and confused.

Luffy stared at his inevitable capture with a blank expression. He wondered at the back of his mind how he had slept through an explosion.

Nami gasped as her eyes widened. Luffy was completely helpless. There was nothing stopping Kuma from taking Luffy from them.

The same thoughts must had rushed through the unknown person's memory since their breaths were on the edge of panic now. The heartbeats were so loud that it sounded like the person's heart could burst.

Kuma stared down at Luffy for a second before he reached his giant hand for the rubber boy. Just as he picked Luffy up by the bandages on his chest, a blur came out of nowhere and hit the Warlord on his right shoulder.

"Zoro!" Luffy exclaimed as he watched his swordsman cut Kuma using his steel cutting technique, revealing his robotic arm.

Kuma was not expecting Zoro at all and he stumbled back in surprise.

"Zoro?" Franky asked in equal surprise.

He wasn't surprised that Zoro had remained conscious through the bomb. The man had the endurance of a battle tank. What was surprising was that Zoro was not only able to move, but managed to land a solid blow on Kuma. If Kuma were a normal human, his entire right arm would have been sliced off.

"How did you stay conscious through that!?" Chopper yelled in complete shock. No wonder his injuries were so terrible. Moving around like that undoubtedly reopened many of his wounds.

Zoro didn't answer as he continued to watch the scene with gritted teeth. The crew could hear his swords clinching together as he tightly gripped the hilt of one of his sword.

Memory-Zoro's eyes widened in disbelief when he saw the robotic arm, shooting sparks into the air. It was hard to say if Zoro was surprised that Kuma had a metal arm or that his metal cutting technique had no effect other than leaving a small cut.

"Bastard...what are you..." Zoro stuttered in a strained voice. It sounded like it took all his strength just to speak.

Kuma turned towards Zoro and stared at him for a moment.

"So...you're a cyborg...like Franky," Zoro observed as he took several laboring breaths. "No...you're tougher than just regular steel."

Kuma's eyes glowed for a second and he opened his mouth. An all too familiar beeping noise filled the air.

Zoro gasped in horror as the Warlord fired a giant laser out of his mouth. He was somehow able to will his body to dodge the beam at the very last second and the explosion sent debris flying everywhere. Zoro was knocked into the air by the aftershock, sending him crashing onto the rubble.

The Strawhats cringed as they heard the swordsman's bones crack from the impact. They could also see Zoro's muscles beginning to involuntarily twitch. He was obviously hurt and barely able to move.

Sanji gritted his teeth, nearly biting his cigarette in half. That stupid moss head was closer to death than he though even before he made his deal with Kuma.

Luffy looked like he was ready to run and help his crewmate.

"This is a memory. You cannot do anything," the entity reminded casually, as if reading Luffy's mind.

"Dammit..." Luffy hissed helplessly as he clenched his fists. His palms were beginning to bleed. Zoro was suffering because of him.

While Zoro was slowly picking himself off the ground, Kuma casually fixed the tear in his jacket.

"The steel...was melted..." Zoro whispered as he stared at a steel beam melting before his eyes. He forced his body to face Kuma.

"Cyborg; that is what I am indeed, but I am far different from Cyborg Franky," Kuma explained. "I am what they call a Pacifista. A yet incomplete human-weapon project of the World Government."

"Pacifista?" Zoro whispered as he attempted catch his breath. The word meant nothing to him. What he did know was that he was screwed against the Warlord.

"Created by the government's genius scientist, Doctor Vegapunk, the man who possess the highest intellect in the world. They say that his scientific knowledge has already reached a level that will take the rest of humanity five hundred years to reach," Kuma stated.

Franky whistled. Although he suspected as much when he saw the scientist old lab, he now wanted to meet Vegapunk more than ever.

"With you being the way you are and an ability user on top of it, it seems that our hope is already lost," Zoro whispered. There was a hint of despair in his voice.

Most of the Strawhats, as well as Luffy, were stunned by Zoro's words. It was against Zoro's nature to give up on anything, no matter how mess up or hopeless the odds were. He was a person who would rather die than to give in to hopelessness.

"Zoro..." Luffy whispered.

Zoro sat on his legs and breathed deeply several times. "As expected...my body isn't responding any more..." He looked up and stared desperately at Kuma. "Why must you take Luffy's head!?"

Luffy felt for his swordsman. He sounded lost and, dare he say, scared. Was Zoro that frightened at the thought of losing him?

"That is as far as I am willing to compromise," Kuma informed in a cold voice.

The Strawhats, who didn't know, looked in confusion at Kuma. What was going on?

Zoro continued to stare at Kuma before he glanced at Luffy's unconscious form.

Luffy saw something pass through Zoro's eyes and he felt his stomach drop and ice form. He was going to do something and he didn't like that look.

"Fine...I'll let you have one head," Zoro said as he turned his eyes back toward Kuma. He unexpectedly got on his knees and bowed his head before Kuma. His head was so low to the ground that his forehead was touching the dirt. "However, in exchange, please take my life for his!"

Luffy choked in shock. If Zoro had stripped naked and set his hair on fire, he didn't think he could be more stunned. Zoro bowed his head before no one, be it a Warlord or a god. It was against everything Zoro was to humble himself. He had to keep himself from yelling for Zoro to lift his head up.

Nami, Usopp, Chopper, and Franky all gasped in surprise. Of all things, they weren't expecting this ether.

Kuma was also left dumbfounded, showing emotions for the first time

"My head may not be worth much at the moment, but this is the head of the man who will eventually become the world's greatest swordsman!" Zoro exclaimed. "Surely, that should be enough!"

Luffy said nothing, but he was noticeably pale and seemed unsteady on his feet.

Zoro looked at his captain, desperate to read any reaction from him. Luffy, however, had his infamous stone face. It was impossible to read Luffy at the moment, even for him. However, going by Luffy's shaking frame, he was not taking this revelation well.

"Despite your great ambition, you wish to take this man's place?" Kuma asked, not quite believing Zoro.

"Aside for that, I see no other way to save my crew," Zoro said before he glanced at Luffy again for a moment. "If I can't even protect my captain, then my ambition is worthless! LUFFY IS THE MAN WHO WILL BECOME THE PIRATE KING!"

"Zoro..." Chopper whispered in awe. He was on the verge of tears. He didn't think Zoro could get any cooler.

Luffy's stone expression slipped a little and Zoro could see the beginning of tears in his captain's eyes. Whether they were tears of gratitude, sadness, or anger, Zoro couldn't tell.

Kuma stared blankly at Zoro as the swordsman returned his own stare, awaiting the Warlord's answer.

"Now just hold on a minute, you bastard!" Sanji in the memory suddenly yelled as he walked behind Kuma with a limp.

Zoro, and everyone else, was more than a little surprised to see Sanji. Robin was taken by surprise as well since she didn't know this part of the story.

"How are you supposed to get ahead if you're dead?" Sanji scolded. "What about your ambitions, idiot?"

Zoro continued to stare in disbelief at the cook. "You...!"

"Hey, big guy!" Sanji yelled as he walked in front of Kuma, blocking Zoro from his view. "Rather than this moss-headed swordsman, take my life instead!"

Luffy, if possible, got even paler. How didn't he know any of this?

"Sanji..." Nami muttered.

Sanji was trembling badly, barely able to keep standing, but he refused to fall as he glared at Kuma. "I know the marines may not consider me a threat, but soon enough, the one from this crew who will cause you the most trouble will be me! Black Leg Sanji!"

"Why you!" Zoro in the memory exclaimed in annoyance. It wasn't his normal irritation with his rival. Zoro sounded truly concern for Sanji's safety.

Kuma stared blank faced at both of them.

Luffy looked between his cook and his swordsman numbly.

"Instead of this guy...my life...take it!" Sanji nearly demanded in a quivering voice as he fought to stay awake. "We both resigned to the sacrifices that we must take! Let this flower of death blossom once and for all! Give me a glorious death!" He glanced at Zoro for a fraction of a second. "Hey...tell everyone...to take care. Sorry, but...looks like you need to find yourselves another cook!"

Before Sanji could make his grand sacrificial move, Zoro slammed the hilt of one of his swords into Sanji's side, just below the ribs.

All the Strawhats, save for Robin and Zoro, winced. They knew the strike would have broken Sanji's ribs if Zoro hadn't been so careful.

Sanji gritted his teeth, remembering all too well when Zoro knocked him out like a little punk. He unconsciously rubbed the spot where Zoro had hit him. "Dammit. That hurt, you know, shitty swordsman. That bruise didn't heal for two weeks," he grumbled.

Zoro refused to acknowledge the cook as he continued to stare at his captain. Luffy wasn't too surprised by his actions, knowing that Zoro wouldn't allow anyone on his crew to die on his watch.

Sanji in the memory stumbled as he glared angrily at the swordsman. He grabbed Zoro's shoulder as he slumped down. "Ba...bastard!" he shouted before he collapsed limp onto the ground.

Kuma watched these events with an empty expression.

Zoro looked up at Kuma as he removed his remainder swords. "This is my final request." He tossed his swords over towards Kuma, putting himself completely at the Warlord's mercy.

Kuma gave a deep sigh after a few seconds of silence between the two men. "If I were to lay a hand on Strawhat after this, my honor would be at stake." His words sounded eerily similar to Aokiji's words after he had frozen Luffy.

"I'm in your debt," Zoro said gratefully.

Kuma turned towards Luffy and gently picked him up. "You can trust me. I will keep my promise. But before I claim my sacrifice, I will make you experience hell."

Some of the Strawhats paled at those words. What was he going to do to Zoro and how did it involve Luffy?

Luffy could only watch the unfolding events with the entity standing quietly next to him.

Kuma put a hand onto Luffy's chest and within seconds a giant red air bubble was pushed out of Luffy's back. The bubble was so big that it was about Kuma's size. Once the process was done, Kuma placed Luffy back onto the ground.

"What I have just repelled from his body was his suffering and stress," Kuma explained. "This is all the damage he had accumulated during his battle with Moriah and Oars."

Luffy looked like he was going to be sick. It couldn't be...

"If you wish to take his place, then naturally you would have to take in all his pain," Kuma stated. "However, since you are already close to death, if you were to take all of this, it would be impossible for you to survive. You will die."

"No way..." Nami whispered in disbelief as she put her hands to her mouth. This couldn't be real.

"Zoro's injuries...that explains everything..." Chopper murmured as it all fell into place for the young reindeer. His eyes were wide with horror and realization. "All that muscle, tissue, and nerve damage were similar to the stress that Luffy experiences when he overdoes his Gears. Why do I only realize it now?"

"That...that guy is so powerful that he can actually push out something like pain from a person?" Franky asked numbly. Were there any limits to Kuma's ability?

Usopp felt as sick as he recalled how messed up Zoro was. Even after over a month had passed, Zoro still didn't fully recover. For a while, Chopper thought Zoro was beyond recovery and he would remain in a crippled state.

"Please, try some," Kuma said as he tore a piece of the bubble off and allowed it to float towards Zoro.

When that one piece touched Zoro, he immediately screamed and withered in agony.

It was like nothing the Strawhats had ever heard from the swordsman. The sounds alone were indescribable. Only Luffy's screams when he was being healed from his poison came close.

Chopper was ill as he watched Zoro's body looked like it was going to explode from the inside. The swordsman's body was actually attempting to mimic Luffy's Third Gear. The crack of bone and the splash of blood made the young doctor want to cover his ears.

Sanji's eyes widened in disbelief. He knew. He knew this would happen, but he didn't know it was like this. That one little bubble of pain alone nearly shattered Zoro's body.

Robin, who normally had no problem looking at disturbing sights, was horrified by what she saw. It looked like Zoro would drop dead right there.

Brook could only grip his cane in dismay as he watched his crewmate suffer.

The memory tore apart for a moment before it finally return to normal as the agony ceased.

"Zoro!" Luffy screamed when the swordsman fell to the ground with a heavy thud.

Zoro was spread out on his back and his eyes were rolled back as he gasped for air. He was quivering like lightning had hit him or he was having a seizure.

"How was it?" Kuma asked neutrally.

It took Zoro several seconds to catch his breath and slowly sit up. Luffy wanted to yell for Zoro to stop, but knew there was nothing he could do. A memory couldn't be changed, no matter how much it sucked. That was pure torture.

"Just...let me chose the location..." Zoro stuttered. His voice was filled with pain.

The scene shifted and they were in a different part of Thriller Bark. Zoro stood in front of the giant pain bubble and prepared himself. Before the Strawhats could think of anything to say, Zoro stepped up to the bubble and plunged both his hands through it.

The results were gut-wrenching, to say the least. Blood splattered everywhere as Zoro's body was torn apart from the inside out. The popping of blood vessels and the tearing of nerves and muscles could clearly be heard.

Before long, Zoro began to scream despite his best attempts to hold it in. The screams sounded completely inhuman and would remain with the Strawhats forever. Luffy's losing ten years of his life was the only thing that could rival what they were seeing and hearing.

Nami immediately started retching and had to turn her eyes away before she threw up. Sanji was immediately by her side and wrapped a comforting arm around her.

Usopp was much the same as Nami as he covered his ears in an effort to block the terrible screams.

Robin was horrified. She thought seeing Luffy being healed back in Impel Down was a terrible sight. To think, all this pain and suffering originally came from her captain.

Brook refused to look away, but he most likely would have lost his stomach if he had one.

Chopper's mouth fell open in shock. The damage he was seeing was beyond measure. It was truly a miracle that Zoro ever recovered from this. Hell, it was mind-blowing that he was even still alive.

Franky stared wide-eyed, not believing what he was watching. Did a person really live through that? How the hell wasn't Zoro a vegetable?

Zoro didn't bother to look at himself. He remembered all too well this experience and he didn't need to relive it.

What he was concerned about was Luffy. All the remaining color had drained out of his captain's face and his mouth had dropped wider than Chopper's as he watched the memory.

Zoro could tell that smug entity was smiling even without a face, feeding off of Luffy's despair and grief along with the rest of the crew's.

As soon as it happened, it was thankfully over. Zoro remained standing tall and he folded his arms across his broken and bloody body. There, he stood. Even as his consciousness faded, his body refused to fall. If he was going to die, he was going to do it on his feet.

No one on the crew could speak. No one had any words.

"Amazing that a mere mortal survived that. He was quite fortunate," the entity said, breaking the silence that had fallen over everyone.

"I...I...I never knew..." Luffy whispered as he thought back to Sabaody and how Zoro was nearly killed by Kizaru.

That was why Zoro was so messed up after fighting that Pacifista. Why didn't he see it? His crewmate, one of his friends, was mortally wounded because of him.

Almost like his body was moving on its own accord, Luffy walked towards the injured and dying swordsman. He stared at Zoro's blood-ridden body for several seconds. He was shaking and his eyes narrowed as righteous anger built in his chest. His breaths became faster and hasher as the full impact of what Zoro had done struck him.

"Damn it...damn it, Zoro!" Luffy screamed in memory Zoro's face. "I didn't ask you to do this any of this, you moron! Did you lose your ambition!? Did you forget your vow to never lose!? Weren't you supposed to become the greatest swordsman!?"

Zoro in the memory didn't answer.

"Answer me, dammit!" Luffy roared as he punched at Zoro with wild, unfocused punches. His fists passed right through Zoro, but he didn't care. "Damn you, Zoro. Damn you! Damn you! I didn't ask you to save me, you stupid, stupid, moron! I didn't ask you to die in my place! You selfish asshole! You asked what your dream would be worth if I die! What would my dream mean if you got your stupid self killed protecting me!? Damn it, Zoro, answer me!"

The entity watched the outburst with dark amusement.

The Strawhats watched Luffy's breakdown helplessly. For those crew members who had just now learned the truth, they felt the same way as Luffy. One part of them wanted to praise Zoro for his bravery and his selfless act in protecting the crew and their captain.

Another part of them wanted to beat the crap out of Zoro. If Zoro had died here at Thriller Bark, it would have forever shattered the crew. Did Zoro think that he was so unimportant that his death would have been meaningless?

Zoro watched Luffy with a shaking eye. He knew this would cause Luffy untold amounts of pain. He knew Luffy would blame himself for not stopping this from happening. This was meant to be his burden and his alone.

Luffy stopped trying to pummel memory-Zoro and attempted to catch his breath. He was exhausted, both emotionally and mentally. Choked sobs left his throat as he attempted to get his emotions under control.

It looked like Luffy had aged ten years before the Strawhats eyes. His eyes had the same emptiness it did when Ace was dying.

"Dammit Zoro...I promised you, didn't I...? I promised you if I ever stood in your way, that I would..." Luffy muttered softly.

"Yes, you did make that promise, didn't you, Strawhat?" the entity mused darkly. "If I remember correctly, the vow details that if you ever cause your swordsman to lose his ambition, you would have to apologize to him and cut your stomach. That was it, correct?"

Luffy said nothing.

"Don't you dare twist the promise we made!" Zoro screamed in fury, but Luffy couldn't hear him.

"Huh, he can't hear us again?" Usopp asked as panic seized his chest.

"That entity must have increased its influence to ensure that we cannot interfere," Robin stated fearfully.

"From what I have observed, you did stand in your swordsman's way and cause him to lose his ambition and dream," the entity stated nonchalantly. "After all, he had to sacrifice everything to save you. Everything would have been settled peacefully if you have been awake and given yourself to Kuma. But you were too weak to wake up and protect your own crew. So, they were forced to save you, yet again."

"Dammit, stop twisting everything!" Sanji yelled angrily.

"Now that I think about it, your swordsman gave up his ambition twice for your sake," the entity said in thought.

Luffy looked at the entity in shock. "What...?"

"I believe he told you that he trained under Mihawk for the past two years," the entity said.

"Shut the hell up!" Zoro yelled fiercely.

Luffy nodded numbly.

"Did he ever tell you how he got Mihawk to train him?" the entity asked in good nature. "It must have struck you as odd that the greatest swordsman in the world would train a man would desired his title. For Hawk-Eye Mihawk to take such a man as his student, a high price much have been paid, don't you think?"

Luffy couldn't answer. He never thought about it.

The entity seemed to smile at him. "He bowed his head before Mihawk and begged him to train him."

Luffy was taken aback by the revelation. He couldn't speak for several seconds. "You...you're lying..."

"Do you want to see the memory for yourself?" the entity asked nonchalantly.

Luffy could only stare at the creature, unable to speak.

"Zoro... But he doesn't bow to anyone," Chopper whispered, not believing what he was hearing.

"He just bowed to Kuma, remember?" Sanji said as he bit his cigarette. He should have expected as much. No way Mihawk would just train Zoro out of the kindness of his heart.

"Is that true, Zoro?" Nami asked the swordsman.

Zoro lowered his head, telling everyone that it was the truth.

"Now, no matter if he reaches his goal of becoming the greatest swordsman, he will forever have the knowledge that he had to beg before the man he wanted to surpass. That when he does defeats Hawk-Eye Mihawk, it was not his sword alone that surpassed him, but the sword of a pupil surpassing their teacher. He can no longer stand proudly and proclaim that he became the greatest all on his own skill and determination," the entity said as he stared accusingly at Luffy. "Are you not proud of yourself, Strawhat Luffy?"

Luffy looked sick. It seemed like he just wanted to disappear as all these revelations hit him.

"You ruined your swordsman just as you ruined your brother, Strawhat Luffy. At the very least, you owe him the dignity of living up to your end to the bargain," the entity said as it got into Luffy's face. "Take responsibility for what you have done. The vow you two made, after all, was a promise between men."

Luffy said nothing as he glanced at the knife he was still holding. He seemed to have forgotten that he had it. "Yes...we did make a vow."

"I promise to be a pirate. Opposing the marines now makes me a wanted man. However, I'll tell you one thing. I will always follow my own ambitions!" Zoro declared through the memory.

"Ambition?" Luffy in the memory answered back.

"To become the world's greatest swordsman. If you ever do anything that causes me to lose my ambitions, you will apologize to me at the end of a sword," Zoro vowed.

"I made a promise to Zoro. By him doing this for me, I didn't live up to my promise," Luffy said as he stared at the knife. "I stood in his way."

"Luffy, that isn't the deal we made! You didn't stand in my way! I willingly chose to sacrifice myself and bow my head before Mihawk! I did it all of my own free will!" Zoro yelled as he walked towards his captain. Luffy still couldn't hear or see him. "That deal...that vow...it doesn't matter anymore! It became void the moment I lifted up my sword and told you that I would never lose again! If you had died here, or been taken by Kuma, it would have been a loss! Can't you see that!?"

Luffy continued to stare at the knife. His expression was blank and unreadable.

"Dammit Luffy! I told you that you can never be a burden to me...to us!" Zoro screamed desperately. He looked close to tears and his one eye was bloodshot. "You are our captain! What do you think would become of us if you die like this!? Our successes, our failures, our victories, our pain, are all linked! It will only break us if you give up and die!"

"So, what are you waiting for, Strawhat? Fulfill your promise. Or are you too much of a coward to do it?" the entity asked, amused by Zoro's outcries and despair. "Your crew will continue to sacrifice their lives and dreams as long as you exist. Does your dream mean more than all of them, your supposed 'family'? You have already destroyed your brother's dream and have severely damaged your swordsman. Save the rest of your crew the pain of serving under a fool like you and disappear."

"Please, stop listening that thing!" Nami screamed as she pleaded with Luffy. "If you do this, it will destroy all our dreams!"

Luffy stared at the knife a moment longer before his grip tightened on the handle. "Zoro...Sanji...Nami...Usopp...Chopper...Robin...F ranky...Brook..." he said slowly. "All of you are idiots."

That sentence was the last thing the Strawhats or the entity expected to hear.

"I never asked any of you to sacrifice yourselves like this for me. If I never achieve my dream, I would still be happy knowing that you achieved all of yours. What peace would you have dying for me? After you all have suffer so much...you shouldn't let anyone stand in the ways of your ambitions...not even me." He smiled sadly. "But...it won't work like that, will it?"

The Strawhats was baffled by their captain. What was he saying?

The entity was equally confused. "What are you talking about?"

"Before I came here, Zoro said that my crew's desire to see me become Pirate King became their dream too. That if I failed, if I died, their dreams would mean nothing," Luffy said softly. "When Zoro said that, I didn't want to believe him. I didn't want to believe my crew's dreams would die along with me."

The entity was left stunned. He could see the memory that Luffy was referring to.

"After seeing all of this, I can no longer deny Zoro's words. They...they were willing to give up everything to protect me. They didn't even think twice saying no to Kuma, knowing that they were going to be killed. Zoro and Sanji threw their lives, dreams, and dignity away trying to protect me, and they said nothing. They kept this all from me to save my feelings," Luffy said as he took the knife and held it by its blade, causing his palms to bleed. "After all of that...after seeing their devotion...who am I to turn my back on them?"

With one twist of his wrist, he snapped the knife's blade in two and dropped the remains onto the ground.

---

The road to salvation can only be found by living and hoping for a better tomorrow. Darkness cannot dispel darkness.

Anyway, I am so happy that last chapter went over so well. I thought for certain that I would be flame since I though most people could never see Luffy in that way. That Luffy was invincible and would never succumb to such mental anguish. I did not want to write Luffy as weak, but to show that sever trauma will change a person and filled them with self-doubt, especially if the wounds were never allowed to properly heal. I personally did not have that revelation about grief and PTSD until I read Meara's Moonfall. If you are a Sailor Moon fan, I recommend you read it, although you have to use Google to find the completed version. That story specially taught me that you cannot put characters through war, death, and trauma without being some real life-changing consequences.

As for the part with Thriller Bark, originally, that part did not exist in the first draft. The entity was more or less defeated once Luffy acknowledge what his 'imaginary' crew said was true. But I kept reading that ending and I always thought it was weak. After all this build up, for Luffy simply be talked down seemed anti-climatic. It makes sense from a pure realistic standpoint, but it is still a weak conclusion. I especially did not like how Luffy completed depended on his crew to save him and that he did not have a moment to turn towards the entity and fight him on his own. After leaving this chapter alone for two weeks, I mused about how it was sad that Luffy never knew about what happened with Zoro and Kuma so I could never show it. Then, it clicked. Why not have the entity show Luffy the events of Thriller Bark in a final pushed to break him. And thus, this chapter was born.

lovasalvaje, thank you for your review. Glad you liked last chapter. It took a lot out of me to write and edit it. Thankfully, this chapter is a bit more happier.

BrokenBridges, thanks for your review and glad to hear from you again. It has been awhile. No, the Strawhats, despite the odds, didn't fail.

speed and write, thank you for your feedback. Van Augur's comment is ironic given what became of his captain who thinks he is all-powerful because he has two Devil Fruits. The entity was a composed of all the manipulative bastard qualities that I have seen in media. He is a mix of Akainu, Father from Fullmetal Brotherhood, Naraku from Inuyasha, with some traits from the Joker from Dark Knight. Namely, he knows what to say and do to twist the heart and cause the most pain. Also, thank you for the information. This is the reason why it is good to have someone with medical knowledge. I figure that there should be a reason, other than Law being kind of twisted. Glad you like Perchance to Dream.

Steph2500, thanks for the feedback. Happy you hate him. The entity was meant to be the embodiment of several terrible characteristics. Hopefully, this chapter saves you love for reading fanfics.

Bluebird42, thank you for your review. Can you tell me what language? I maybe mean to Luffy, but Oda created the situation so go blame him. Hopefully, this chapter will not make you cry as much. I listened to the song you recommended. I have to admit, it does go along well with this story. I usually don't deal with themes, when it comes with music, but I rather like this song.

SerenePhenix, thanks for your review. I cannot imagine how this chapter effected you given your second review. I am sorry to hear about your issues. I can only research what you and Luffy went through. The common misconception about depression and PTSD is that you can tell when someone has it because they are always sad. Most people with sever mood disorder do not broadcast it. They hide it and attempt to act as normal as possible. They don't want people to know that they are sad and make themselves more of a 'burden'. I could only write the type of chapter last week because I am disconnected. I can sympathy with people like Luffy and yourself, but I never experience that type of pain, self-doubt, and sadness. If I did, I do not think I would have the courage to write it. Especially with writing something like the entity who throws all that pain in someone's face and mocks them. I hope you are doing better and have found peace with your demons. Also, I loved Sanji's reaction too. It was one of the few times that really shows how much he cares about the crew outside the women.

doubledamn, thank you for your feedback. I actually did take two psychological classes in college, although I am far from being an expert. I thankfully never had to experience, directly or indirectly, what Luffy went through. So, it was research and understanding human nature. I think it was The Animaniac Dude who really one of the first authors to invoke Luffy having psycho-trauma from his brother's death and seeing his crew died. I cannot be sure since I did not read Will of D, just heard of it.

janzen222, thanks for the feedback. Hard to kill something that is already dead.

skittles3512, thank you for the review. Whoa, I am thankful that I did justice to these serious disorders. Not would be worst than getting a review saying, 'you got completely wrong!' Hopefully, the solution was also as realistic. I cannot say that my intent was to create a story that gives hope to people who have survivor's guilt and PTSD. If they do, I will see it as an honor. One of the main messages I wanted to give for this story is learning to forgive and know that help and love can be found if you need it, especially with the support of ones' love ones.

LazyFoxLover, thanks for your review. Exactly :)

Dogtooth3030, thank you for your feedback. There is still at least two more chapters.

angelrider13, thanks for your feedback and don't worry. The Strawhats are not allowed to fail. Btw, upload another chapter to Blooming Memories already. :P

Spritefyre, thank you for your review. I would love to, but can't hit something that is a ghost.

OnePieceFan2, thanks for your review. The entity has indeed done many terrible things and Luffy is only its latest victim. It has been doing this for a long time. I feel the same way about Akainu in general. Oda has gotten much better with his villains. His first set: Alvida, Morgan, Kuro, and Don Krieg, were very shallow and unimaginative. Blackbeard may have an interesting back story, but Oda had to pull some storytelling to save him from the gutter in my eyes. Akainu, I can imagine he had a run in with some really bad people who twisted his world's view. I, unlike Blackbeard, do not see him as really bad in the traditional sense. Just that he has a very black and white view of the world. He is kind of like Hannyabal, except much more powerful and ruthless.

Lover's Red Rose, thank you for the feedback. And, even in death, one is never alone.

shadowmarialove, thanks for the feedback. That would be cool, but Luffy is not good enough for words to turn the entity's words around. Instead, he made the entity's plan backfired by his actions. The entity forgot, even if you think you know Luffy, you can never truly predict him.

READINGhearts17, thank you for your review. Writing mental health is never easy, especially everyone react differently from trauma.

Molly Grace 16, thanks for the review. Luffy is OOC in the sense that we never seen him act like this in canon, because he never faced this kind of problem. The closest point of reference is his breakdown after the war and that didn't last very long. I wanted to show that Luffy wouldn't just heal after being talked down by Jimbei. Something like what Luffy went through take years of intense therapy and healing. Having those deep wounds ripped opened and left the bleed, would break almost anyone, even Luffy. As for the similarities between Ace and Luffy, I do agree that I drew a lot of similarities between the two that may or may not exist in canon. They both act happy-go-lucky and carefree to their friends, but they do have deep insecurities and fears that they don't want people to see. I think that is because I believe that no one is strong all the time and no one is without doubt. Luffy maybe simple, but that does not mean he does not feel the consequences for his actions. He may try not to let his bad decisions control him, but they are still there.

KTDLover, thank you for your feedback. Luffy lasted as long as he did is because he is strong, even when he is at his weakest. He was not going to break easily.

OnePieceNarutoBleachFan, thanks for your feedback. Well, I can have a twisted imagination. But all my readers more-or-less know that. Also, a lot of what I wrote last week came from board discussions I saw during the time period of Marineford. Some vocal people were very critical of Luffy. As for if Luffy so broken about Ace's death that he considered killing himself. I would have to say yes. In Luffy's own words: 'If...I don't fight here...if...I can't save Ace...I...I WOULD WANT TO KILL MYSELF!'. So, it is not something I speculated out of think air. He did not come out of his depression, until Jimbei snapped him out of it. Also, one of the entity's main argument was that he would get his crew killed one day and would be left alone. People with sever mental disorders do not think rationally. They always think the worst of themselves and the future.

Chocobaby, thank you for your review. The mist is just known as the entity. I cannot say that I agree about the latest manga chapters. To me, Nami and Robin have much more personality after the time-skip since Nami shows her heart and caring side more, the kids and Fishman Island, and Robin is showing her humorous side more often. There is more to a character than their fighting abilities. Both Chopper and Law, but Law is far more dispassionate than Chopper. As for the timeline, this is a AU in which the Strawhats are on their way to Dressrosa to meet Law who has Ceasar. Kinemon and his son is also with Law. So this story happens after Punk Hazard.

Honeydee, thanks for the review. Jimbei's moment could not happened since the entity wants Luffy to have the worst possible opinion of himself. Having the speech happened as it supposed to it would rekindled Luffy's spirit. Yes, it was the entity laughing. He is not a fruit user. He is a ghost who has powers that he should not have. I might have to PM you about my D theory since it could be fairly long. Luffy and Zoro will eventually have that talk, especially after this chapter. The reason why I was so worried about last chapter is because it deals with a lot of hard issues that efforts people in real life. Me getting it wrong would have just ruined the entire story, which is why I rewrote several times. Also, what bomb did the entity drop?

NeitherSaneNorInsane, thank you for your feedback. Wow, it is nice to know I provoke such strong feelings. The entity did really say some hateful things. As for if the entity was right overall, as the Strawhats pointed out, they were all half-truths. One could take and see Luffy's actions as selfish and arrogant, but Luffy's real intentions was to save and protect those closed to him. It would have been heartless and against Luffy's character to do nothing at Sabaody and Marineford.

Akenomyosei, thanks for the feedback. That is the response I wanted, so glad I achieved it.

treeofsakuras, thank you for your review. The entity's statements were half-truths. If you did not know Luffy and what drove him, his actions can easily be seen as arrogant and selfish. That is not really the case as the Strawhats pointed out to Luffy.

laFia, thanks for the review. The entity did more or less give a very twisted retelling of One Piece. This is the version of someone who really hates Luffy would tell. As for why last chapter was so heartbreaking, the more bitter the defeat, the sweater the victory.

Shiningheart of ThunderClan, thank you for the review. You made a very good guess, but the results were probably not what you expected.

The Poarter, thanks for your review. Sorry, this isn't that type of story.

Kasai Shingai, thank you for your feedback. I know :)

DragonReader, thanks for your feedback. Luffy is not really suicidal, but he does have some major issues. The reason why he is pushed to become suicidal is because the entity made Luffy believe that he had no worth. That he is a burden to everyone and he will eventually get all those he love killed. So, in Luffy's eyes, he is not only ending his own pain, but doing everyone a favor. Jimbei's speech for Luffy was not shown because the entity prevented the memory from going forward. Namely, he kicked Luffy while he was down and grind his face into the dirt. I am a believer of saying, 'earn your happy ending'. Sorry for making your cry so much, I can only suggest taking aspirin before reading this story. Writing will most likely remain just of hobby for me. I really have no real desire to be publish, or if I do it will be more of a side thing instead of my career.

The Mad Reviewer, thank you for your review. Believe it or not, I am not a fan of angst for the sake of angst. There will be angst in my stories, but there will always be a purpose behind it other than making the character suffer. Whitebeard specially said that Blackbeard was not the one Roger was waiting for. What does mean exactly has not been reveal. I could mean that Blackbeard is not a real D, or it could mean that Blackbeard simply does not carry Roger's flame. It is all up in the air right now and opened to interpretation. There seems to be a connection between One Piece and the Will of D, but we can only guess what that is. That would be an interesting ending. I agree with Akainu being too dangerous to be left alive, since his dream is to kill all 'evil' people and being defeated will not stop that dream. Blackbeard, having him live with his broken and shattered dream seemed more like a fitting punishment for someone like him who thinks he rules the age. Actually, having him spend the rest of his life in Level 6 of Impel Down erase from history fits his crimes better than death.

cocopuff123, thanks for the review. I believe the main reason why Oda had not really touched on Luffy's issues yet is because he wants to focus on the main story. Luffy more-or-less has two years to himself during Amazon Lily, Impel Down, Marineford, and the Post-War arcs. The other Strawhats need some time. Given what is happening in the current arc, I would be greatly surprise that some issue with what happened with Ace was not brought up. I also think that a story like mines would be considered too dark and have too much angst for most people who read One Piece. The last thing we need is people calling Luffy Sasuke, even if his angst is justified.

Evening Rise, thank you for the feedback. Pretty much. There is no real reference for broke Luffy. I can understand why you did not like last chapter given the really heavy subject matter.

Zinfer, thanks for the feedback. Honestly, I do not know how authors write chapter by chapter. This story would be very different if I wrote one chapter at a time and then post. And yeah, I was horrible to poor Luffy last chapter. Although, you can't talk :P

Vuurvlieg, thank you for your review and I understand what you mean. I think I did a little bit of both in this chapter. The Strawhats helped picked Luffy up, but he was the one who stood up for himself in the end. What you said is true, but the people with people who has mental disorders is that they don't tend to think rationally. If Luffy was in his right mind, he would see the major flaws in the entity's arguments. Also, I think Luffy is really starting to learn that having the freedom to do what he wants regardless of good advise does has its price if you do not have the strength to back it up. In the case of Sabaody it nearly took his crew and going to Impel Down and Marineford did cost a lot of people their lives. In other words, you can't act careless all the time and not expect to be burn one day.

Sweet-Candy-Floss, thanks for your review and nice to have another hurt Luffy fan. I tend to always show my love for characters by hurting them. I guess I am sadistic that way.

LeoGearSecond, thank you for your feedback. Fate seems to have a love, hate relationship with Luffy. One minute, fate his helping Luffy. The next, it is kicking him in the butt. Although, I do feel that fate will side with Luffy in the end.

Neko-VongolaPrimo, thanks for the feedback. Turning all of Luffy's wonderful speeches against him was probably the lowest thing that entity did and that is saying something. You also got your wish about Thriller Bark.

Walt-Disney and Anime, thank you for your review and you are indeed review number 1600. I guess I owe you a couple dozen digital cookies. I still can not believe how much this story has grown. I looked back at chapter twenty and I wrote about reaching over 500. That means that I got three times those reviews in less than half the chapters. I mean, wow. Also, what you wrote in this review means a lot to me. I was so scared about this chapter since I was taking Luffy's character into depths it never been before and that last chapter could destroy this story. What is funny though that the entity's speech was originally made to justified why the Strawhats had to go through all those memories instead of just going to Sabaody. It is amazing how it evolve into something so much more than an excuse. I have to admit, you are very closed to getting right what the entity is. He also does have a bit of Spandam, cruel and manipulative, although the entity is much smarter. Also, glad you watched movie 6. I hoped you enjoyed it.

As for why the Strawhats spend so much time yelling at the entity instead of talking to Luffy, it is mostly because they are not thinking straight. They are all pretty much in panic mood and are just reacting.

My Guest Reviewer, thanks for your review. You are too kind. Thank you for the words of encouragement.

HotWiredTree5833, thank you for the feedback. Thanks for the information. Glad you enjoyed Perchance to Dream. I still considered it one of my proudest works, especially given the short time I wrote it.

MemoriesOfVoxei, thanks for the feedback. As a writer, we are out worst critics. We look at our work and think it is crap and who would read it. Given the importance of last chapter, I felt that no one would like it and call BS on everything I wrote. Even when my betas said it was fine, I still sweated about it. So, hearing that people loved last chapter is such a huge relief that I cannot even explain it. I am sad too that this story is reaching its finality. It has been a big part of my life for these past eight months. But a good story has to have an end.

yukiko hyuga-chan, thank you for your review. Luffy wasn't really in his right mind. He thinks he is burden that his friends do not need. Now, he is beginning to see the truth about his self-worth.

blacklightningwolf, thanks for your review. Yes, the entity can show Luffy the ending to Thriller Bark. Too bad it had the opposite effort of what it expected.

Jewel Princess1992, thank you for your feedback and nice to hear from you again. I got your PM. Hopefully, this chapter got your heart beating again.

Labyrinth-chan, thanks for your feedback. Sorry about that. I know that last chapter was almost an angst feast, but it really could not be helped. Oda does shows the aftermath, but it almost always years after the fact. Like how Robin saw the destruction of her home and we get time-skips of her time on the run. The same thing with Nami working with Arlong. I think it is because One Piece is first and foremost an action manga. Most of the fans would not want to read about the emotional aftermath of trauma and pain. The target audience of One Piece is 13 years old boys, who wants to see fighting, not people going to counseling. Which honestly, almost all the Strawhats would have lifetime triple A memberships. As for over doing it with dragging Luffy's feelings into the mud, I do agree. The thing is, I had to break Luffy on every possible level to pushed him to even considered suicide as a reasonable option. If I stopped short, then Luffy's breakdown would be unrealistic and would not do justice to his character. Mist of Memories and Perchance to Dream does have similar themes, which is why I decided to make this story a sequel instead of an independent story.

My Guest Reviewer, thank you for your review. Although, is there a place worse than Hell?

Nameless, thanks for your review. I try to never discontinued any story I post. I know what it is like to have your favorite story cancel. Most of the time with no warning. Only time can ever tell if a fic will be forgotten. It is an author's dream to write a story that inspires other writers and influence their work years after the story is completed. It gives your work a sense of immortality. As for my plans after this fic is completed, most likely a break and I really need to return to the fic I put on Hiatus.

SomebodyLost, thank you for the feedback. If I wrote everything, this fic would be a million words lol. Well, since I am not Oda I have the option to include fillers and movies. I just made sure that there is a reason for them to be there other than to make the story longer. Some disagree, but it is what it is. Honestly, I could be reading too much into Oda's work, but I cannot help myself. My favorite stories always make my mind turn. I am very happy you like the story. Hope you stick around to the very end.

MysteriousEyez, thanks for the feedback. I cannot blame you for stopping and starting. I do not think last chapter is not one you can read in one sitting unless you were in a certain mood. And you are right. The entity is more or less voicing what Luffy feels in the darkness of his own heart. Which is why he more or less agrees with everything he was hearing. Those with deep depression and PTSD goes through much the same thing from what I have researched.

SawadaTsukimi, thank you for your review. That is the big what if, would things been better if Luffy never came. One can make arguments both ways, but you probably have to ask Oda about the final answer.

Eratia, thanks for your review. One Piece does hide a lot deep stuff with its colorful characters and goofy art style. Really, the world of One Piece is really messed up. As for the last couple of chapters being depression, that is true, but there is no real place to placed lighthearted moments. Putting humor between Ace's death and now would be ill-suited and would have ruined the mood of the story. Also, all the drama is supposed to be fast and furious, so the Strawhats or Luffy can catch their breaths. The entity emotionally drained Luffy to make him easier to manipulate. Kind of like how Oda made all the drama of Marineford happened almost all at once to the point that many reader became fatigue.

As for the Blackbeard theory, I see where you are coming from but I do not completely agree. Remember, Crocodile was considered the Hero of Alabasta and the government did not suspect him at all of doing anything. The only reason Smoker found out anything was because he was chasing Luffy. So, if everything went as Crocodile planned, both sides on the civil war would have been killed and the people would have no leader. So, it would only make sense that they would turn to Crocodile and make him their new king since he is already popular. The World Government may not have liked having another Warlord kingdom, but they would probably allowed it since it would not have appeared to be a hostile takeover and the people willing chose him, which I believe was Crocodile's plan and why he did everything in the shadows. He also would not have access to the ancient weapon since Robin had no intention in helping him and I doubt he would find it on his own since it has remained hidden for hundred of years. Therefore, the warlord position would not have been opened to Blackbeard. In a couple of years it maybe and Blackbeard could built a rep, but the only reason things went so well for Blackbeard is because he captured Ace, one of Whitebeard's man, luring his old captain into a war that weakened him and gave him an opening to be killed. Also, it is highly doubtful that Blackbeard would have made it out of Impel Down given that he had to deal with Magellan and all the forces of Impel Down and would not of have Shiliew to help him. So, Luffy and Ace were very big parts of Blackbeard raise.

rainingsnow, thank you for your feedback. Good job guess the last half of this chapter. I am becoming too predictable lol. Jimbei's moment got completely stolen. Blame the entity.

Monkey D. Danny, thanks for the feedback. We are reaching the end, but we are not quite there yet.

saltandburnit, thank you for the review. This is payback for leaving me hanging in Cold Blooded Fate :P. Kill off Luffy in that fic and I will rewrite this chapter and give it a sad ending. (I'm joking by the way.)

Therightandwrong, thanks for your review. No problem about the late reply. Most of that is on purpose. To make the entity's arguments seem more convincing I used board discussions and what people actually said about Luffy during that time period. I wanted to make what the entity said seem true from a very cynical and twisted point-of-view. As for why Oda haven't dealt with Luffy's feeling about Ace, I think Oda most likely wanted a break from Luffy being the center of the story and focus more on how the world changed and the workings of the New World. I would be surprise if Luffy's feelings about Ace's death is not touched on in the latest manga arc.

RexLink, thank you for your feedback. I cannot blame you. Last chapter depress me and I wrote it. And, funny you should mention Thriller Bark.

Pokabu , thanks for your feedback. Yeah, I really pushed the Strawhats along with Luffy. Everyone is emotionally exhausted and they are given no time to rest before the entity came.

samettikettu, thank you for the review. You have given me a very big compliment. When I wrote last chapter, my biggest fear that people would see Luffy as out-of-character and I did not present his trauma right. To hear that you not only think I kept Luffy in character, but reached for his deepest soul mean more you can understand. Showing that Luffy has more layers than being a simple and straight-forward idiot is a challenge. I have no problem with people who sees Luffy that, but I always saw something deeper within him. Hope you stick to the end.

With all that done, until next chapter, take care.

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Spoiler Alert for Manga Chapter 720. Do not read if you only watch the anime:

I promise myself that I would not put anymore manga spoilers in my notes since this is cruel to my anime only watchers out there, I just compel to comment on today's chapter given the subject matter. Namely, Blackbeard is still is still asshole and we finally see Luffy's reaction to hearing from that man again. I half expected Luffy to shoot laser out of his eyes in one of the panels. The parts with Bartolomeo was freaking hilarious and an excellent used of callback by Oda. Not to mention Luffy unknowing getting an army. Also, Aokiji, don't tell me you are working for Blackbeard. You left the marines because the new fleet admiral is a jackass and you are working for a pirate who is just as bad if not worse? I used to like you.(partly kidding on this point)

Anyway, this is my favorite chapter since 700 in the time-skip, although I would love it more if Oda didn't take so many breaks. It is almost as bad as Marineford. Also, unrelated to the manga, just got Season 5 Voyage 2 DVD set. Finally get to see Robin's back story in the dub. I have been waiting six years for Funimation to reached this point. It is good to be an One Piece fan right now.