Disclaimer: Varian Wrynn and all recognisable characters belong to Blizzard entertainment. Valerica Glenmore and characters not from Warcraft or it's associated games cannot be sold or used without express permission from the author.
It would be the evening before Winter Veil Eve when they eventually got back to Stormwind, and with winter well and truly established, it was pitch black by the time the Wolf docked in the now functional harbour. Varian went down the gangplank first with a half asleep Anduin in his arms, smiling at Val as she followed.
"Are you sure you don't want to come to the Keep tonight?" Val shook her head, patting his arm and falling into step with him. "No, I need to get home Varian, I've been wearing the same clothes for two days, and I'm sure Gramma wants to see me."
The Black Rose was docked by the next pier, they could see it before they'd even stopped themselves, and from the lack of noise coming from it, she could guess where the crew were.
"I'm sure she can wait another night." She knew he was being purposely petulant, so didn't chide him for it, but she did give him a pointed look, which only made him chuckle in return. "I've just spent three whole weeks with you Varian, don't be greedy."
He huffed, making sure Anduin was still awake so he wouldn't have to leave poor Johanna with the task of undressing a sleeping toddler, it would be like giving her a lit stick of dynamite and telling her to silence it without putting it out. "I'll be as greedy as I want when it comes to having the woman I love with me."
Val pulled up the collar of her coat (it was nowhere near as cold as had been in Ironforge, so her black one was sufficient), watching her step since it seemed to have snowed lately, leaving a sheet of frost on the stairway leading from the harbour. "Varian."
He rolled his eyes, hearing her tone. "Alright fine, I'll leave it, but that doesn't mean in any way that I'm happy about it." She lightly elbowed him, strangely glad to be back in familiar territory no matter how much she had loved Ironforge.
"I'll take that. What time should I be over tomorrow?" Varian had to think about that for a second; he needed time to scrub himself up and make sure everything was in place, and rolling out of his pit half an hour before she arrived wasn't going to cut it.
"About ten? The show starts at twelve so we can have breakfast together than go." She stopped, knowing they had reached the point of the city where it would make more sense to separate, despite Varian's many protests about walking her to her door. She stood on her toes, giving him a kiss that he considered far too brief.
"Good deal. I'll see you then." He still looked like he wanted to argue with her but knew better, bringing Anduin's head up so he could see her. "Anduin, Mum's going home." Anduin looked like he was struggling to keep his eyes open so Val knew to make this quick.
She kissed his forehead, squeezing the hand that caught her fingers. "Sleep tight Little Lion." Anduin's brow furrowed. "See Mum tomorrow?" Val kissed his hand this time, still gushing at how little it was after all the time she'd known him. "Yes darling, see Mum tomorrow."
That brought a smile to his face. "Then night night Mum." Varian chuckled, bending to kiss her once more before turning on his heel. "See you tomorrow love." She waved him off, waiting for Varro to catch up and putting her hands in her pockets.
"Thank the Light, no more fucking snow." Val kicked a pile of slush with a grin. "Oh come now, you make it sound like you didn't have any fun at all." Varro took his scarf off, winding it around a hand. "I think you and I have very different ideas of what's considered 'fun'. Standing next to a blazing hot forge then going out into waist deep snow is not mine."
The blonde looked behind him to make sure Varian wasn't within earshot, bending down to her. "So, did you find out what the big secret was?" Val nodded, only egging him on. "Well, go on then, what was it?" Val shook her head. "You'll know when it happens, there's no point in me telling you." He groaned, throwing his head back.
"You're such a bitch." She kicked his shin, finding it highly amusing how much her guard was interested in her love life. "Got everything done for Winter Veil?" Val nodded, seeing that there was at least someone in the house and they weren't all at the tavern since the candles were lighting up the windows.
"I actually managed to get it all sorted before I left, which is an amazing feat for me." She poked his side. "Including your present." Varro's eyebrow rose. "Mine? But you're my employer, you don't need to get anything for me." Val shook her head. "No, Varian's your employer, I'm your mate." Varro couldn't resist making fun of the faint Stranglethornian twang on the word 'mate' that she had. "Oh, I'm your mate, am I?" She narrowed her eyes.
"Shut up or I'll return your present." Varro's laugh only made her more giddy and she didn't know why. She put her hands in her pockets and rocked on her heels, piquing his interest. "Don't suppose you want to go to the Nag's Head for a cheeky one?" Varro's brows drew down. "Wouldn't you want to see the others?" Val pointed to the dark windows on the second floor, where a music box could be heard through the open pane.
"That tells me the children are asleep, and that tells me that Cillian's not here. The Rose is in dock but empty, the house probably only has my Gramma in it and she won't be up long…So it only makes sense." Varro pulled a face, offering her his arm. "Well, you've convinced me. Come, first rounds on me."
She could hear the group she was looking for before even getting to the tavern; their jovial shouts and singing could be heard from the cobbles outside, filling Val with a warm happiness that had eluded her nights lately.
She was more than sure that Varian had noticed her coming to the Keep in the middle of the night every now and then these past few months, climbing into his bed and offering no explanation as to why she was suddenly there, but he knew, she didn't doubt that, but he didn't judge or pester, he would merely hold her, just as she expected him to, so to actually be at peace with the darkness was a strange feeling.
Varro held the door open for her, letting the warmth of the roaring fire and the smell of tobacco, beer and roasting meat fly at her, with familiar faces all gathered around four tables that had been pushed together with drinks in their hands and humorous, inappropriate songs on their tongues.
"And if the sea should swallow me, remember this my dear, that where'er I be, you'll always see-" Val took a deep breath, bellowing as loud as she could with a grin on her face. "My big and hairy rear!" Cillian swivelled round, leading the cheer that came with her discovery. "Lass! We didn't think you'd be back till tomorrow!"
Val opened her arms ready for his boisterous hug, feeling her feet leave the floor and having to wonder how damn light she was since every man she knew could lift her no matter what size they were. "We decided to come back a day earlier to make sure we were here." Cillian put her down and clapped arms with Varro, pulling them both towards their large circle.
"Why, you not pleased to see me then?" Lily climbed over a chair to kiss her cheeks, looking bloody glad that she was here. "I was counting the days! The men have been driving me up the wall!" Val looked to the bar, where of course Carson was working, laughing as he vaulted over and scooped her up.
"Don't you ever leave me that long again, you hear me?!" Cillian poured them both an ale from the large pitcher in the centre of the table, passing Val hers and clinking his against it as they all sat down. "Where's Varian?" Val swallowed her mouthful, grunting a little when Carson's large arm went over her shoulders. "He went back to the Keep Lil, Anduin was half asleep bless him." Cillian grinned, slinging one leg over the other. "Oh I bet that lad was a treat and a half in Dun Morogh." Orazio leant forward, putting a hand on one knee.
"How was the trip lass? Anythin'….exciting happen?" Val glared at Lily since she knew she was behind whatever ideas had been put in their head, and from the smirk creeping onto the redhead's cheeks, she was right. "If you're asking whether Varian asked a certain question, no he didn't." She tried not to grin at the disappointed faces of Lil and surprisingly Ameena, who Val was sure had told her during the war that she'd never sit in the same room with her brother.
"But we had a brilliant time regardless." Khurdam, the only dwarf in the circle, gave her a grin as wide as Elwynn itself. "So, what did ya think of Ironforge lass?" It took everything in Val not to squeal like a newborn pig, so she settled for kicking her legs, not unlike Anduin would. "It was amazing. It as literally everything that I expected it to be!" Morris' toothy grin for once didn't make her squirm, but only made her happier.
"Did ya use the forge?" Val was in the middle of a drink so motioned to Varro to answer for her, and thankfully he came through. "She wants to say 'I went a bit nuts and made very single thing imaginable, including the bangle I'm wearing and the cuff that Varian has when you see him'." They all had to laugh at the lengthy but accurate translation, more so at Val's nod of confirmation.
"See, he knows me too well already." Ameena, who could pride herself on not thieving baubles like the one Val had around her wrist in years, but that didn't stop her fascination with them, holding out a hand and turning the limb, running a fingertip over the horseshoe shaped bangle with curls at either end and twists in the middle.
"This must've taken a while…" Cillian snorted, draining his goblet. "Hardly, Val could churn those buggers out in about five minutes." Morris looked less than interested on the topic of conversation, pouring himself another drink. "Is that it? You went to Ironforge and made nothing but baubles?" Val shook her head, understanding how a man as dense as Morris wouldn't appreciate the little things. "No, I made myself a new sword while I was there, you know…just in case." Lil snorted. "Just in case she needs to stab someone."
That made another murmur of laughter ripple across the group. "Knowing Val, that's one hells of a long list." She kicked Cillian's leg, looking into her tankard. "I'll admit, it was nice, just being a normal family for once." Her brow furrowed and of course, Orazio noticed. "What's playin' on your mind lass?" Val leant in, prompting them all to mimic her. "Well, I take it you all know about the Horde?" She knew Cillian would nod his head. "Aye, our little birdies told us they've all left the Eastern Kingdoms, and we couldn't be happier about it."
Val gave him a small smile. "What about Lordaeron? Have any of you heard about what's happening there?" Thankfully she got more nods. "Nasty business." She pointed and swung her finger to everyone sitting around her. "Terenas has implemented a quarantine up there, so I don't want any of you going north for any reason." Carson's grim look didn't fill her with hope. "I don't suppose you've heard anything about Gilneas? I've written to Arin a few times but I don't get a reply."
Val's face was full of sympathy. "That's because not even couriers are allowed between the north and south. But as far as we know, Gilneas hasn't been touched, it's purely Lordaeron." That seemed to placate him to a certain extent, but Val knew it would be playing on his mind.
Cillian obviously didn't want the mood to deflate, so nudged Val in the side. "Go on then, tell us more! What else did you do on this little excursion of yours?" Val grinned, draining her goblet and slamming it down. "There's not much else to tell, we spent most of our time just out in the snow."
She didn't stop Cillian pouring her another drink , but had to keep in mind that she had to hold off a hangover so she could properly enjoy tomorrow. "How about you all fill me in on what I've missed. Varian's refused to talk about anything political with me whole we were there so I've been very much out the loop."
Orazio clucked his tongue, rubbing his hands together. " Well I take it Minnie's told ya the good news about Robin and Priss?" Val nodded, trying not to roll her eyes. "Aye, she did, any idea how far along she is? I don't remember her saying anything at Hallow's End."
Cillian stole a piece of the cheese Ameena was eating, earning a glare from his little sister. "Must be about a month or two at most, she ain't showing yet, so it's still early on." He started snickering. "Harley ain't happy about it." Val's eyebrow rose.
"Oh? What's he said then?" Lily answered since Cillian's mouth was full, leaning back in her chair. "I think his exact words were 'no more babies! Bored of babies!" Val was glad she hadn't taken a drink like Varro had since his ale was now spraying everywhere.
"Oh Light, I bet that went down well." Cillian shrugged now he'd swallowed. "I think Robin found it too funny to be angry about it." Val had to ask even though she would regret it. "Cil…why did you really bring Gramma here early? She knew that we were away, so it can't be just to see Anduin." Cillian bit his bottom lip, running a hand through his hair. "Ah, you know old Minnie love, she just wanted to make sure everything was ready for when you got back, that's all."
Val clearly wasn't convinced, but they had all been sworn to secrecy about Varian's intentions, so Lily took the reins and dug four dice out of her breast pocket. "Who's up for a game?" Val got her pocket watch out, checking it wasn't too late before nodding.
"Why not, one or two games won't hurt." She pulled her purse form her belt instead and threw a few silvers into the middle of the table at the same time as the others. Carson noticed Varro hadn't put any in the kitty and gently nudged him.
"Not having a go then mate?" The blonde shook his head, and Val really didn't like the way he was looking at the dice like they were going to kill him. "No thanks, I haven't gambled in years, and I have no plans to." Morris apparently didn't grasp the unmentioned reason for it that the rest of them did, waving a hand over the table. "Oh come now, one game won't hurt." Orazio narrowed his eyes a the lanky man. "Don't pester him lad, if he says no, he says no."
Val squeezed Varro's thigh as hard as she could considering it was twice the width of her hand. "I'll take your go for you." Varro gave her a grateful smile. "You better win for me then Milady." Lily closed her hands around the dice, shaking them with a determined look on her face.
"Are we doing winner takes all?" After a murmur of 'aye', Val watched as Lily threw the dice across the table and cursed, looking at Orazio, who had a small piece of parchment and a stick of charcoal in his hand. "Four." Orazio jotted her score down and couldn't help his chuckle. "Seems your lucky streak has broken Lily."
"Carson! Get back here, you can socialize once your shift's done!" The Kul Tiran grumbled, standing and kissing Val's cheek. "I'll be done in a few hours, try not to lose our rent." Val stuck her tongue out at him as Dino took his turn, grinning wide enough to show Val every gap in his mouth.
"Eight!" again Orazio scribbled his score down. Val leant back, pulling her cigar case out and cursing herself when she found it empty. "Ere lass, have some of this ta tide ye over."
Khurdam passed her his lit pipe and Val hesitantly took it, not really knowing what to expect since she'd been told Dwarven pipes were ten times stronger than cigars. She let the others take their goes as she took a small inhale, feeling her nostrils burn and fighting back a cough, supposing that it was the first one, it was inevitably going to knock her for six. Her theory was confirmed when she took another, letting the instrument sit in her mouth as Jacoby passed the dice to her.
The small bone cubes felt pleasantly cool as she curled her hands around them, knowing that there were people looking at her who knew her only as Varian's partner, disapprovingly gazing at the woman who had won the king's heart partaking in the three worst sins of any Light fearing soul, but she knew deep in her chest that if he could, Varian would be sitting right next to her, giving her a wicked smile as he took a turn and chugging beer like it was the last thing he would ever do.
These people, the probably imagined ones Val had conjured in her head would never know him properly, or know how much he yearned for what was essentially a pauper's life, but she would make sure to blur the lines for him as much as she could.
She had hardly won a thing by the time the tavern closed and she felt the chilly air on her less than cognitive face, yet she still had a smile on it, walking through the quiet Trade District with Cillian, a little jarred by how even the builders had stopped for the night, filling the place with a slightly eerie silence. "It's way past our bedtimes." She laughed, holding on tighter to Cillian's arm since it was keeping her relatively upright. "I know, how naughty are we?" Cillian looked down at her, his lips curling into a smile.
"I remember your Da going drinking with mine when we'd visit." Val chuckled, watching her breath crystallise in front of her. "And your mother watching me you and Luce, using every curse word she knew when they eventually stumbled back in."
He sighed, and she knew what he was about to say. "Just us left really, ain't it?" She made a face, masking her hurt with bad humour. "That depends on how much you piss Varian off." Cillian's chortle made the mood lighten, but only for a second. "I miss em Val. I know it's not the done thing anymore, but I really do miss em."
Val grimaced. "You think I don't? It's so disheartening, waking up in practically the same room and not hearing them of a morning. I love who I'm living with now, don't get me wrong, but every morning I stay in bed with my eyes screwed shut, pretending that I can hear them arguing about the state of the world."
Cillian unlatched her arm from his and took her hand instead, holding it tightly. "I'm not going to try and tell you to come home with us Lass, I know your place is here…but the offer will always be there, you know that, don't you?"
He nudged her, giving her the warmest of smiles. "You're never alone, I hope you know that." Val nodded, squeezing his hand and kissing his whiskered cheek. "I know I'm not." Cillian knew she wasn't ready to go home yet and she appreciated him not forcing it, merely wandering through the city. "They would've loved Anduin." Val made a small noise of agreement. "That's the understatement of the millennia. Papa would be already be teaching him how to get in all sorts of trouble."
Cillian grinned, kicking a stone away. "All the way here Harley and Thomas went on about playing with him. I'll warn you now, some idiot gave Harley a slingshot." Val made a face of utter dismay. "Great, I'll be sure to tell Varian when Anduin inevitably gets hit with it."
Cillian clucked his tongue, putting his spare hand in his pocket. "Ah, I'm sure they'll be careful with him. It's good really, how the three of em have become family despite everything." Val smiled, leaning over the bridge and watching the canals, moving back and searching the ground for a stick, much like Cillian was now he had twigged what she was doing.
"A prince, a pirate and a pauper…sounds like the beginning to a corny joke." They both threw their sticks in, moving to the other side to see which one reappeared first. It had been a game they'd played for years, and it felt nice just having a moment of childish fun. "I think it's brilliant. It gives the lad a sense of normality that isn't politics or lessons." Val gave him a grin. "Speaking of which, how's Thomas' schooling going?" Cillian's laugh didn't fill her with confidence.
"Oh, he dropped out, just as we expected him to. Said to me 'Da, I've done two years of this shit, I can write a letter and read the basics, I'm done.'" Val couldn't help but look impressed. "It always surprises me how much that boy's head is screwed on."
Cillian murmured an agreement, picking up another stick and passing her one, making her wonder where they were all coming from before she saw the tree hanging over the bridge from the other side. "Better than most of us do I reckon." Val snickered, dropping her stick at the same time as him.
"Now that I won't argue with." Cillian hated to be serious during what was by all accounts a good night but couldn't help himself; she probably wouldn't talk about this with anyone else and he needed to know a few things. "Lass?" Val leant against the stone, rightfully suspicious of his tone. "What is it?" Cillian twiddled one of his rings, tapping the ruby and grimacing. "Are you ready to marry Varian? Like, really ready?" She folded her arms and her defences went up, it was as if he could see them.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Cillian frowned, knowing she'd react like this. "It'll make you the Queen of Stormwind, that's a bloody big thing love." Val's bravado wavered, it was more than obvious. "I know it is, but I think I can handle it." His eyebrow rose, stretching the two shaved lines that had once held piercings. "Can you? You still have anxiety attacks and night terrors Val." She was three seconds away from shutting down completely.
This was really not a conversation she wanted to have out in the open like this, much less with someone she knew had a habit of saying the wrong thing. "That's not going to affect how I rule Cillian. I'm getting better and so is Varian, we're helping each other with it and doing well." She tried to muster a smile for him. "You know me Cil, I'll adapt, like I always do." Cillian didn't look at all convinced by her shaking voice. "You can tell me if you're scared love."
Val looked down and he knew he'd cracked her shell. "I'm terrified Cil. Why do you think I told Varian I wanted to wait? Alright yes, it was for the people, but it was mostly because I have absolutely no idea what the fuck I'm doing, and everyone knows it. Tiffin was born and bred for this shit, I wasn't, and I'm going to fuck it up some way or another." Cillian thankfully knew her well enough not to smother her with a hug like most people would, but a firm hand on her arm told her he was listening, which was all she wanted.
"I'm sure Tiffin didn't know it all either love. You'll get used to it all after a while, I can bet money on it." Val could feel herself shaking and she didn't know whether it was from nerves or sadness. "And what if I can't? What if I just end up embarrassing Varian? I don't know the workings of a bloody kingdom, I don't know anything about taxes, or laws, or half the things that man has to deal with every day."
She sighed, knowing she was overthinking this. "I know I'm being ridiculous and that I probably will end up getting into the swing of things alright, but I can't help being nervous." Cillian crossed over to her, lifting his arm and waiting until she was under it to put it down again.
"No ones saying you can't be lass." She huffed, warming the silk of his shirt. "I can't even curtsy properly." Cillian couldn't help laughing at that one no matter how serious the conversation was turning out to be. "Oh come now lass, that's hardly the be all and end all of being a queen, is it? No one's going to care if you can curtsy or not."
He gave her a squeeze, glad that she had actually opened up instead of closed herself off with what was by all accounts a delicate and touchy subject. "And if they do, you come find old Cil and I'll make em regret it, understand?"
Val snorted, looking up at him and really hating how she was shorter than absolutely everyone. "You're not that old Cil." He huffed, looking up at the sky. "Older than you though, ain't I? That practically makes me the wise old git you come to." Val was laughing, that was a start.
Cillian knew her fears wouldn't go away easily, but he also knew that she had a plethora of people readying themselves to help her. As much as he had grumbled about Varian in the past, the king had given him the impression that once Val did indeed become his wife, she would have an equal hand and say in everything, so surely that meant someone was going to teach her.
He would be highly disappointed if Varian left her in the lurch the minute the ring was on her finger and the crown on her head, but he sorely doubted it would come to that scenario. "What, are you a bloody wizard now?" Cillian scoffed, letting her go since she started squirming.
"If I were a wizard lass, you'd bloody know it by now. I'd be abusing my power by any means necessary." Val pushed herself up, sitting on the wall of the bridge and swinging her legs. "Making every woman fall in love with you?" Cillian gave her a grin. "Oh please love, I do that without magic, how dare you insinuate otherwise." She crossed one leg over the other, steadying herself when she started to wobble. "Is Gramma still on at you about settling down?"
Another snort. "Nah, she gave up on that months ago. Finally realised it was a futile endeavour." She looked at her lap, not quite sure how to put this. "Do you miss her?" Cillian's eyebrow went up. "Miss who?" Val couldn't meet his gaze. "Tiffin." That's when he made a small 'ah' of realisation. "I do…but lass, you have to realise, that was never going to be a long term thing, and she knew that. So I don't miss her as heavily as some people think I do, but I do miss her."
He ran a hand down his face, scratching his chin. "I see her everytime I look at Anduin, so it's a bit impossible not to really." Val hopped down, thanking him for catching her hand and steadying her.
"Varian doesn't know whether it's a good thing or not." Cillian merely shrugged, swinging her arm. "It's a very good thing, if you ask me. Not many people around here remember Tiffin anymore, it's nice to be reminded every now and then."
They heard the cathedral bell signal the hour, looking up at the nearly finished spire and finding that it was alot later than they first thought. "We better get back lass." Val murmured an agreement, putting her hands in her pockets. "Are you staying at ours tonight?" Cillian gave her a small smile.
"Aye, but something tells me you're not." Val tapped the side of her nose, kissing his cheek. "Go on, I'll be back in the morning, so save me some breakfast." Cillian was reluctant to let her go by herself but knew better than to attempt an argument over it, rubbing her arm and brushing her down. "Good deal. See you tomorrow lass."
Val turned the opposite way to him, putting her hands in her pockets and hunching her shoulders against the cold air, glad of the lamplights as she crossed back over to Cathedral Square, stopping at looking up at the building, taking a deep breath and going inside, feeling a strange warmth cover her the minute she crossed the threshold.
She'd only ever really come here for services, like funerals or blessings, but to just sit in one of the pews for a personal reflection was an entirely new experience for her, and she didn't understand exactly why she was in here, but felt like she needed to be.
She leant back, taking a deep breath and trying to make sense of everything, no matter how hard that was. She had always known that marrying Varian came with strings, titles and responsibilities, but she supposed she had merely pushed it all to the back of her head, blinded by the idea of just being his wife and forgetting what it brought with it.
"Lady Glenmore?" She rose, leaving her pew and bowing her head to Archbishop Benedictus, bending to kiss the signet ring on his left hand, emblazoned with the symbol of the Church of Holy Light. "Apologies Your Grace, but I needed somewhere quiet."
As usual, his face was soft and understanding. "I see, is there any way I could help you?" Val hated being so open , and she didn't know whether it was because of the building they were in or the older man abusing his powers of the Light, but her tongue became looser before she could stop it.
"I don't think you can unless you have a handbook on how to go from blacksmith to queen in ten easy steps." Even his chuckle was thick with compassion, and his arm light around her shoulders as he sat them both down again. "I take it King Varian has declared his intentions then?"
Val plucked at the cuff of her coat, not being able to meet his eye. "Not in so many words, but he's made it very obvious that it'll happen soon." His hand curled around hers and she could feel every wrinkle on his palm. "And you're scared about that?" Val felt confident enough to shake her head this time, finally looking up.
"No, that's not what scares me, I want nothing more than to marry His Majesty (she had to remember who she was talking to every few seconds and use the appropriate language), but it's just….well, I don't need to tell you how far away from the image of a perfect queen I am, you can just look at me to know that." Benedictus patted her hand, looking as empathetic as she expected him to be. He looked tired, making her wonder if she'd woken him up, but the doors to the cathedral had been wide open, so surely she wasn't intruding?
All the thought did was make her feel more guilty about being here, but if he wanted her to leave, he certainly wasn't making it obvious. "Is there such a thing as a perfect Queen? Is King Varian considered the perfect King?"
She worried her lip, really thinking about her answer. Of course there were those that had opposed some of Varian's views, particularly on the war and the rebuild, so really, he had a point. "But Queens are meant to be the picture of grace and dignity, and I'm completely void of the first and have barely of the second."
She took her hand away to run it down her face. "I've just spent the whole night in utter sin, and yet people will be expecting me to make decisions that affect their lives." Benedictus frowned, seeing the anguish on the young girl's face.
"My Lady, have you spoken to King Varian himself about these troubles of yours?" Val shook her head and felt horrible for it. "I don't exactly know how to tell him, if I'm honest. I fear that he'll just think I'm getting cold feet when really it's the opposite." She sighed, knowing she was merely wasting his time.
"I'm being ridiculous, aren't I?" At once he shook his head and she didn't know whether he was being sincere or not. "Not at all my dear, these are realistic fears to have. Pledging your life to King Varian brings the same commitment as a priest merging with the Light; everything will change in your life, and it'll be alot to adjust to, but have faith Lady Glenmore, and you will adjust."
He looked slightly stern for a short minute. "But I advise you to talk with King Varian himself about this; he has gone through similar changes, remember. Being a prince is much different to being a king, as he's probably realised in these past four years. A relationship cannot hold if one person doesn't speak to the other of their fears or doubts."
Val still didn't look convinced. "I don't want to embarrass him. A King should be proud of his Queen, and I don't think he'll get that with me." Again, she got a smile. "Correct me if I'm mistaken Milady, but won't His Majesty be marrying you for love instead of duty?" Val's eyebrow rose at the suspicious simplicity of the question. "Aye, at least that's the impression I'm getting."Even she managed to laugh at the stupid joke, but Benedictus' was as quiet as hers.
"Then may I suggest something radically unorthodox? Maybe he's already proud of you. He's chosen to be with you, and If I'm right, hasn't told you to change any aspect of yourself?" Val bit the inside of her cheek. "Not yet he hasn't, no." And with that one little sentence, Benedictus knew exactly what her problem was. "You have very little confidence in yourself, don't you Milady?" Val stayed silent but her face said it all. "Hidden pain is the worst out of the lot, isn't it?"
She merely looked at him. "Everyone else has so many problems, I fear mine will just be lost in a sea of voices, so I just don't bother anymore." She quietly huffed, putting her hands in her lap. "I compensate by trying to solve everyone else's little misfortunes and it ends up backfiring every single time." His hand felt surprisingly light on her shoulder after being used to large ones pressing down on it all the time. "The doors to this holy house are always open to you my dear, and the sea of voices of which you speak is less than fretful here."
Val shook her head. "I think the Light wouldn't want someone like me here. I've done so many things to infuriate it over the years I think I've been abandoned." Benedictus squeezed her shoulder. "I understand you've lost your faith, but it can be reclaimed Milady, if you let it." She gave him the tiniest of smiles. "I'll think on it, that's all I can promise." She stood, and Benedictus joined her. "Apologies for the late visit Your Grace."
He inclined his head, moving to the aisle so she could get out. "The Light has no concept of time Milady, so neither do I. My final advice would be to not fret so much of things that are not set in stone. Become the Queen you wish to be, not what others wish you to be. Queen Taria came from a background not unlike yours, remember, and is hailed as one of the greatest queens Stormwind has ever been graced with. So bear that in mind next time, and don't compare yourself to others as much Milady. The people will want to see you, not a carbon copy of those who have come before you."
Val pulled her coat around her, kissing his hand once again and leaving with a simple 'thank you Your Grace'. She still wasn't going home yet, she needed to be somewhere else tonight, so instead of turning right as she always did, she went left, waving to the children pressed against the window of the orphanage, clearly trying to evade sleep as much as she did when she was that age and succeeding by the looks of it.
They looked thoroughly elated to have been noticed and started waving madly back, making her wonder if this was what Benedictus had been talking about, little gestures that made people realise she did see them, and knew they were there. Maybe that's all she needed, who knew?
She carried on, smiling to herself as she heard the dock bell starting to toll, telling her not only how early it was, but that the city was starting to get back to normal in terms of its life, which was always reassuring after a time of great change and flux that Val hadn't been sure she could handle. She hadn't been lying when she'd said to Cillian about missing how things were, but knew she'd just end up going mad if she stayed in the past like this.
All around her, progress was taking place; even as she crossed the bridge and walked through what would eventually be the Dwarven District, seeing the buildings take shape and smelling the oil of the machines that had been used that day, it was an exciting feeling, looking forward to how Stormwind would eventually look.
Then she got to the Keep and felt apprehension creep up her spine again. She had told him she wasn't coming tonight, what if Light forbid, he'd taken another bedmate instead, or wasn't even here himself? She had to stop and laugh at the sheer absurdity of it, probably looking like a madwoman to the six guards on duty by the gates, who were probably wondering who this random woman was giggling to herself in a clearly drunken stupor until she got closer and one of them recognised her, saluting and bowing his head.
"Lady Glenmore." She returned his gesture, musing at how she'd only just gotten used to hearing herself being called that and probably sooner rather than later her title would change once again to something she had never dreamed of.
The Keep was silent bar a few pairs of feet still scuffling around, and Val couldn't help but feel like she was doing something criminal since every pair of eyes focused on her as she ascended the stairs leading to the residential wing, not even bothering to count the doors anymore since the layout was exactly the same as it had been before the Keep had been destroyed, add that to a sleepy Jon standing outside one of them and she knew exactly where to go. He looked up at her footsteps, looking as surprised as she was at her sudden appearance.
"Milady…we weren't expecting you." She put a finger to her lips and patted his shoulder. "Change of plans Jon. Is Varian in?" Jon nodded, opening the door for her and giving her a smile. "You know you're always welcome Val. You don't have to wait until the middle of the night."
She appreciated his minuscule whisper even though it was drowned out by Varian's rumbling snores, adjusting her eyes to the darkness once the door closed behind her and the only light was the moon coming through the curtains.
She knew it was a little strange coming to his room like this, but before she could question herself she was already dumping her coat on the floor and pulling her breeches down, leaving her shirt on and padding across the stone floor, sliding in beside him and kissing his back seeing as he was lying on his stomach.
He stirred but she didn't care, she just snuggled down on the pillow next to his and closed her eyes, finally feeling certain about something tonight, that she felt the safest with the man lying next to her.