When you close your eyes to see
The truth that's inside me
May you hold your breath to breathe
your empty reality.
-Flyleaf

ShiKai CH.38: Eyes to see

A gray world.

Kei knew she wasn't dead. She had died enough before to know what it tasted like. Yes, taste. A bitterness, an amalgamation of unreleased resentment tinged with sorrow and fear at the moment of death. Then, cleansed for a time.

She liked that feeling. Of being light, without a care in the world. It was of being insentient to the outside world, being born again anew. With the same hopes and dreams that it wouldn't happen again. That those horrible things wouldn't be said and everything would be kind if only...

"I'll be a good girl, okaasan, otousan."

They were smiling down at their frail child.

"I promise I'll never destroy anything. Just please..."

The smiling people were gone and the rain was falling hard. Others were approaching, she was the only one left. "I promise I'll be a good girl, uncle. Just please..."

The old man faded.

She was standing before a mirror, the reflection was that of a pale, starved creature, dark hollows created shadows beneath the dulled purple eyes. Waist-length black hair hung unkempt and limp. The mouth moved as hers did, "that's-"

'You.' A small elfin-like girl was reflected in the mirror. Pale hair clung damply to her shoulders, an unhealthy pallor tinted her skin. The sickly girl stared balefully into the mirror and it felt, straight into her eyes. 'You haven't carried out your promise to me.'

The hand that clamped about her wrist burned with a raging fever.

"L-leave me.." her voice shook, but she was unable to get the words out. Alone.

"I will be in control from now on." Keiko Yamamoto said.

Eyes flew open.

White walls, shadowed high ceiling and the face above her.

There was a moment of lucidity.

"Ichi-" The blood froze in her veins. Something was inside her, clawing its way to the surface.

She felt afraid, terribly so. It was like losing her sense of self. The more she resisted, the stronger the pull became until she was slipping, further and further under. The darkness was deeper, the lull, an abyss past the precipice she was falling off of.

"Ichi..go." her hand was outstretched toward him.

His voice seemed to come from a great distance away. "I'm here, Kei. I'll never let you go--"

She felt the mouth that was no longer hers, smile.

"-again."

That was all Keiko Yamamoto wanted.

Was to be loved.

-Something's wrong-

The insistent pulse and beat hammered at his heart and mind.

Over and over again.

-I can't feel-

Kagami forced his flash-step to the reaches of his ability. Shindou and Shin-Soku had never been his, Shunpo to match the speed of a Quincy however had been considered his forte. Not that the Shinigami ever knew that. Kagami irritated, slowed his step to allow Ishida to catch up.

"You need to work on your speed, laggard!" He regretted it once it had left his mouth. That was something only Kazeatari would say. Fortunately the Quincy didn't seem to take it personally. "Something's really wrong, isn't it?" The light reflected from his glasses, perspiration stood out on his brow. Kagami had once felt ashamed and yet still amazed at the depth of the Quincy's perception.

Have to watch myself... "We have to hurry." he said simply.

She's gone.

Kazeatari felt the plummeting sensation deep down inside. The loss cut through her like a knife slicing a limb away. The feeling was strong that physically she felt sick. Swaying, she caught at the wall, gripping at the smooth stone with clawed fingers, the other pressed to her chest. Beneath her breast, her heart thudded with adrenaline. Every sense was alive. She was acutely aware of the human's look of worry; the mute vibrations in the polished rock from containing the massive spirit pressures inside it.

Just a little more ahead. Kazeatari closed her eyes, she knew Kurosaki was just beyond the small stretch of the hall and the doorway. She knew what she would see lying there on the floor. Her hand tightened around the sealed fan. And if it had remnants of his spirit pressure remaining there...damn it all.

She would make damned sure he didn't leave Hueco Mundo alive.

Kazeatari in a sudden impetuous burst, used Shindou to phase from sight.

In the gloom of the room she looked into she saw him as expected beside a...

Body?

This was... Yasutora rumbled quietly behind her, "Ichigo."

"Impossible." Kazeatari whispered, instead of feeling relief, a rush of boiling anger filled her. "This can't be!" Through the blur that was the room, she felt her hands grasp at the thin white clad shoulders and shake violently, "wake up, damn you! Wake up!!!"

This wasn't.

"Kaze--" she ignored Kurosaki's feeble attempts.

"Wake up, I said!!" her palm met the girl's smooth cheek.

The sound of the slap resounded in the room.

Then as she raised her hand to deliver another blow, firm tanned fingers wrapped around her wrist. "You won't touch her.." Kurosaki's voice was dangerously low, his eyes flashed and she recognized the subtle elevating of his reiatsu as a more tangible warning.

Kazeatari would've laughed at his weak intimidation if she hadn't been deeply confused herself.

As it was she broke his grip with a rough jerk, rising to her feet, her eyes falling from his taut expression to that of Kei-no-the girl's peaceful, almost serene face.

Kazeatari had never seen the fire wielder with such an expression. Ever.

"That's not Keiko." she said with certainty in her voice as Kagami and the young Quincy burst into the room.

Damn him. Somehow even her anger seemed duller as if her emotions had been taken long before. As if she were heartless and incapable of feeling like the pitiful white uniformed creatures with identical horned masks. Gloved hands rested above the alike sword hilts.

"Ryoka. Do not attempt escape."

Mara laughed quietly at this representation of the Hollow species if it could be termed as such. The eye holes were vacant but a dim malevolence similar to that of a dumb animal emanated from them. Clearly they didn't appreciate the absurdity of the situation. Her eyelids fluttered shut, a slight smile forming on her lips. "Does a child dare to speak untoward to its elder?"

"You-" Their hisses were full of venom.

Undisturbed by the clack of gleaming blades withdrawn from scabbards, Mara placed her left and right palms together. "It'll be..."

They began to charge.

A sphere of pale blue light formed in her hands, the energy spilled from between her fingers diffusing an ethereal glow to the bone-white faces and colorless desert.

"Like I was never even here."

The light exploded like a supernova.

~Tsukikage Castle~

"You must learn to not only sense..but feel the reiatsu of your enemies and allies. Know when the release of a Zanpaku-to happens even if you're half a mile away. Learn, Takara. You must!"

She swung her feet back and forth, sitting on the wider part of the veranda railing. Without closing her eyes and even throwing her senses to the surroundings; she knew Fourth's Lieutenant had released her Zanpaku-to.

A faint drop in the air.

A coldness dancing along the fine hairs on the back of her neck.

A deadening.

Kyou had released his as well.

Like his sister's Zanpaku-to, the abilities of Reiki mirrored that of absorption. That was why its release command was Assimilate. And as much as Hana disliked the knowledge that his advancement of skill was to place him on the vanguard as it were...

Takara felt the sudden plummet of Zoe's spirit pressure. He still wielded the same amount of deadly capability for draining the opponent's power. The Lieutenant was pulling back. Kyou was pressing forward. Zoe's rapidly decreasing reiatsu shot up again.

"Ban-kai." Takara murmured.

She was going to try and entrap him with the energy he had stolen.

Nearly succeeded too.

A swift performed Kosokuken left the match-just that. At a tie.

Takara phased from sight only to touch down on the opposite railing, her feet spaced apart on the narrow balustrade, "that wasn't very nice..Jinteki Erimyasho."

The man held up his hands in surrender, "sorry. I've heard about your Captains class reflexes from my captain and just had to test them myself."

"Oh, really?" Her afterimage hadn't faded by the moment when Haretosora was poised beneath his chin. "And how do I measure up?"

"Like a true Lieutenant. One as strong as a Captain." he said, smiling up at the sky as if the tip didn't graze his throat, drawing a tiny droplet of red beneath the afternoon sun. Takara watched unrepentantly as it dripped onto his collar. "I suppose." She slid Haretosora into the scabbard without looking, "but then if I wasn't, I would be a failure."

And I would've failed them...those who are the most important to me in the world.

"Lift your sword." Hand folded around a slim Wakizashi.

"Never look back," a wink from an eye the color of the sea lapping at the golden sand along the shore.

"Pride is for weaklings. Forsake it and stand..." the gleam of black and the fire within her eyes, "we fight this night."

"You have a lot of pride in your abilities." Takara said distantly, her eyes toward the far gates. Jinteki hadn't sensed it and most likely very few had. The approaching reiatsu of two Shinigami. Hitsugaya-Taichou and Matsumoto Rangiku...damn. "That's why.." they had halted at the gate. She inhaled sharply, "you'd never make a good Captain."

She flash-stepped from sight.

True worth comes from trusting another and not just believing but knowing your own power. Her eyes closed against the rustle and whip of the branches stirred in the wind. The guards--Fifth's Seijin Maru and Kazura Ichinomiya of First had crossed their swords. True to their oath never to allow anyone from the outside world within the hallowed ground of the city.

They would lay down their lives to defend their positions.

Takara could heard Hitsugaya yelling: "this is ridiculous! Don't you know who we are?!"

The unyielding, emotionless tones of Seijin, "Hitsugaya Toshiro and Matsumoto Rangiku of the Soul Society."

"Then why won't you let us in?!" Hitsugaya stamped his foot childishly and Kazura's facial muscles twitched just the slightest. Seijin's didn't change. "We have not the authority to grant such access."

Takara watched from afar; Hitsugaya's face redden with anger and Matsumoto look from her Taichou to the Juppongatana officers. It was clear they didn't know what to do. "Look.." with effort Hitsugaya controlled his tone, modulating it to extreme politeness, "just call the nearest Captain and they can resolve this-this security issue!" he threw his small hands in the air, glowering at the stony Fourth seat.

"That would be impossible." Seijin said perfunctorily, "Captain Raven Kanzaki is not to be disturbed at this hour."

Takara bit back a giggle. The auburn-haired Kazura managed to wipe the amusement from her expression as Hitsugaya's narrowed eyes went to her.

"And why not?!" the white-haired mini-Taichou cried.

"Because." Takara swung from the tree, "he is attending to his duties as First Division Captain. Paperwork and grievances with Hisrio-etc." She smiled sweetly to offset the suspicious looks from Hitsugaya. Seijin stepped back, Kazura as well with a respectful murmur of, "Lieutenant Shimizu."

"We are as you know, short on available Captains," Takara continued, making sure that the glittering embroidery on the Lieutenants band caught in the sun. "I am only a Lieutenant," she said before Hitsugaya had a chance to remark on it, "we have several currently seated candidates contending for the vacant Captaincy of Third-"

"They all will have to pass the Thirteen Court Guard companies' inspection." He said, with an eyebrow raised. Takara bit her tongue, instead giving a decidedly acidic smile, "well, I'm sure you'll find that we do things differently here. We have our own methods-proven successful for choosing worthy Captains. One must fight against the current-or otherwise person set at the Lieutenant level for the Captaincy and prove that they are superior to the other."

She saw Matsumoto's appalled face. "Not to the death. Just simply to demonstrate their skills to the adjudicators. And if death ensues for the Lieutenant..well then the so-called victor would be put to death themselves by the attending Captains, and from the other entrants a new Captain and Lieutenant are picked out."

Matsumoto was silent for a moment then asked carefully, "what happened to your Captain? I mean when we heard there was supposedly a full five Divisions, we thought--"

"He is deceased." Takara interrupted flatly, "the Captain of Third died during the great battle over a hundred years ago. We only knew his first name, Hasumi and the name and power of his Zanpaku-to Aohien Ageha."

Light washed over the field, a thousand butterflies all the colors of the rainbow eradicated the Hollows in the vicinity. It was a beautiful yet heartrending sight for the wielder of that power was caught within the eye of the blast.

"Hasu-"

Takara saw the butterflies floating over the field once again and the bitterness that accompanied it. With effort she kept her voice even, "Captains Nanatsu and Namaiki will be back shortly. If you would be so kind as to await their arrival in the living world, then please do so. We are all heading toward the brink of war, social occasions will have to wait for a time when the worlds aren't on the verge of destruction." She looked Hitsugaya in the eye, through the iron bars of the gates. "Good day, Hitsugaya-Taichou."

Ren couldn't easily forget the words Takara had read aloud. It was there in the back of her mind, following Kanzaki through the halls and finally doors to the northern wing. There, he received a few murmured greetings of 'Captain' and even she got a couple of, "welcome back" from the other officers. Ren barely heard them.

The old man in his youth...

Ren herself wasn't a very romantic person not by a long shot.

Maybe that was because she just couldn't see giving a part of herself to any person. Not wholly so that she would die or feel the loss of that person. Sure, she felt. But it was in a kind of dulled way. Harsh words doled out by Hisrio that might reduce some to tears, merely glanced off of her. Joy at simple things felt by Second Division's Kimiko, Ren didn't understand them. It was only a plant. A flower that happened to be beautiful. So what?

She guessed she was just insular and always had been.

But, Fourth's captain...now she was different.

Keiko had two sides to her. Both were like night and day.

The extroverted, compassionate side.

And the quiet, brooding side which showed wistfulness for things long gone.

Yet they were alike in their determination-no that was wrong. It wasn't like that orange-haired kid's 'resolve' it was still different. The same energy, the same fortitude...

Was that why-?! The answer was so simple, that for a moment Ren was lost and didn't hear Hisrio's question. The breaking of the...!

That was the cause of everything?!

~Assiah~

"Are you sure that was the right thing to do?"

The sea wind whipped at her hair, snarling the dark strands. Kazeatari impatiently shoved the hair from her eyes, "I don't know."

"What do you mean, you don't know?!"

The wind gust blew even harder reflecting the torment of its wielder.

"I just said, I don't." she turned to face him, a sardonic look on her face. "I don't like the thought either of Urahara getting his hands on her. But...as of this moment I cannot find it in me to acknowledge her anymore... as one of us."

~Mindscape~

The ruined citadel of the moon...

Touda alighted on a broken statuary, his curved beak gleaming a phosphorescent purplish gleam. The mindscape of a Soulreaper reflected their inner self much the way a Zanpaku-to was part of their soul. His hellfire pure blue flame eyes appraised the hollowed out ruins and battlements. The bleak, dead air carried the scent of decay. A dead world, Touda thought, twisting his head upside down.

Nothing bloomed...

Except. He suddenly took flight, soaring to the center of the stone labyrinth at the center of the sunken gardens. Beneath a diseased ivy creeper blackened with withered patches, a single lilac branch emerged from the crumbling wall, a tiny conical array of light purple buds hung low.

But beneath it in the grasses was a yellow Chrysanthemum in full bloom.

"I accept the way things must be, my heart belongs to another and yet...the first stirrings of love. You have awakened new emotions in me." Touda said to himself, then chuckled quietly, "oh, wielder. Your heart is in turmoil, isn't it?"

~Living world, Urahara Shoten~

This feeling.

The girl's eyes opened to the room full of people.

It's like...being born again.

The same concerned boy's face from before, was closest. His shock of orange hair was the brightest thing she had ever seen and she stared at it long, wanting to run her fingers through it. Was it natural? It seemed almost fake so vivid was the color.

"Kei?" A suffusion of pinkness dusted his cheeks.

"Who?" the girl said, sounding quite confused, "I do not know who that is."

~To be continued~

AN: I really have way too much fun with this ;) I was working on a video for YT, the third of its kind featuring pics of almost every JP Soulreaper. This latest one had Orihime angsting over Ichigo and whole lot more IchiKei than the previous ones!

Thanks for reading!

No flames-haters-stupid comments!

Reviews appreciated! :3