DISCLAIMER: I base my stories on Intellectual Property (IP) owned by BioWare ™ and EA™. I pretend to live in their world. In this chapter I quote some dialogue directly from the DAO script.

SPOILERS: I refer to information from the games, the novels and the comics. If you have not played or read, please beware.

CHAPTER 36: STARS WERE FALLING FROM THE SKY

9:30 Dragon Solace === Redcliffe

"Morrigan wants us to what?" Alistair yelped. He took a deep breath and raked his hands through his hair. He and Liam sat in front of the cold hearth in his room in Redcliffe Castle. "Liam, the woman saved our lives. I realize she's an apostate, but…kill her? How? If Morrigan's to be believed, she's escaped templars for…what…centuries?"

"She's more than an apostate Alistair. I'm not sure what she is, but it's not human."

"That goes right along with centuries-old, still alive and impossible to kill."

Liam rubbed the back of his neck, suppressing a smile. "I suspect she saved us for some purpose of her own."

"And she'll be disappointed to die and not see that purpose fulfilled, which brings me back to Morrigan wants us to do what? Kill her! How? And what is the reason?"

"I don't know exactly, and, before you squawk, Morrigan hasn't told me…everything. She needs more information, too. She will tell me, but after her mother is dead and she has Flemeth's true grimoire." His brow furrowed slightly. "As for what Flemeth is…."

"She's not possessed, it's different than what we felt in the Tower. The whole feel of her and her magic is different. I didn't realize that when we were with her, but after Kinloch Hold…can she die? Will a smite even work on her?"

"Her magic is definitely different…and old. I sense that too. Killing her won't be easy. I don't know about templar powers. I do know she can shapeshift."

"Someone had to teach Morrigan." Alistair closed his eyes, stretching his legs out towards the hearth bricks. "Into?"

"A dragon."

His eyes snapped open. "And that worked out so well for us last time."

"Maybe we should bring Taina." Liam grinned.

Alistair did not laugh. "I plan to send her into the Brecilian with Kai. Each group needs a warden. Daveth to South Reach and Taina to the Brecilian. Jowan isn't ready to lead. And I think the elves might accept a dwarf warden better than a human. Even with Kai along, it could still be difficult…Liam, why would we do this?"

"Flemeth, to extend her life, takes possession of a daughter's body, becomes young again and gives birth to more daughters."

Alistair stood staring at him. Finally he shook his head. "She possesses a daughter. Like with her mind, her soul?"

"From what Morrigan explained, yes. In the Tower I found a book, a grimoire, that was Flemeth's. I don't know how it got there – probably found by templars hunting Flemeth. Anyway, Morrigan read it and discovered what her fate was to be. She asked me to kill Flemeth to prevent it."

"You didn't answer my question. Can Flemeth die?"

"No I didn't. Morrigan isn't sure she will remain dead, but she believes her corporeal body will die and that will hinder her reanimation, as it were."

"I don't believe we are considering going to try to kill an ancient…creature."

Liam shrugged. "Morrigan will be grateful."

"To you. I suspect she'll continue baiting me. Do you want to do this?"

Liam pressed his lips together. "I do."

"For you then," Alistair said quietly. "I'll do it for you. And better that Taina and Daveth stay away to ensure there are still wardens in Ferelden."

"Alistair, Morrigan told me something else disturbing. It's what happens when a warden kills the Archdemon. Do you know?"

"Well, the Archdemon dies? Duncan never said anything beyond the fact that it takes a warden." Even Mel hasn't mentioned anything beyond that.

"Morrigan assumed we knew. She was shocked Duncan hadn't told us." He shook his head. "So was I, for that matter." Liam stared at the unlit pile of logs, his hands raised, palms together, fingers touching his lips. Finally he spoke. "The warden dies, Alistair. That's what makes us so necessary. If anyone else kills the Archdemon, it just finds another tainted creature and recreates itself. It's what made the First Blight last so long. If a warden kills it, the warden is the nearest tainted creature. The Archdemon's soul can't regenerate inside a warden – a creature with a soul. Both die. Both souls are destroyed."

"You believe her," Alistair whispered.

"Yes. It makes sense." He sat quietly.

"So we do this, use the treaties, raise an army, battle the darkspawn, and in the end one of us can't survive? The one who kills the Archdemon has no chance? No seat by the Maker. No reincarnation of the soul. Nothing? The reward is oblivion?" His laugh was a bark. "Just like Morrigan, if her mother possesses her?"

Liam pressed his lips together. "Very similar, but Morrigan may have a way to protect us. It's why Flemeth sent her with us, she says. That's Flemeth's ulterior motive. Save the warden who slays the Archdemon. If Morrigan can do that, I'm going to work with her. In return, I want to save Morrigan."

"If? How? Magic?" Alistair leaned forward, forearms resting on thighs. "There must be more to it than saving a warden?"

"There must be, yes. And yes, magic. I think I'm the better judge of her ritual. I want you to know about the possibility that Morrigan can save the slayer, but I'm not asking your permission. I will work with her."

Alistair stood up and stared out the window across the lake. "This goes beyond whatever it takes, Liam. Our mission is to kill the Archdemon, not ensure our survival. Any one of us could die at any time."

"True, but, if we can kill the Archdemon and not die ourselves…? Why shouldn't the slayer live? We're all young, Alistair. I suspect older wardens took on the killing in past Blights. We have no older wardens."

"Unless Nevarra sends more."

Liam shrugged. "If that happens, great. If not, I want to be prepared. I will work with Morrigan, Alistair."

"If her mother sent her to protect us, Flemeth's probably not planning on taking over her body right away. That begs the question, why does Flemeth want to protect us?"

"I don't know. I do know Morrigan's the one who will do it, not Flemeth. Killing Flemeth won't stop Morrigan from helping us."

"We have to do it now?"

"No, we could wait, but since we're going there…."

"Right. Get it over with. Liam, it's almost murder."

"You say that as a former templar initiate?"

"I don't agree with what most templars do, but capturing her is not an option. I do understand that." I should talk to Ser Bryant. Maybe he should come with us. And we have a good supply of Ashes if we all die. Me saying that…that should make everyone laugh. This time I'll wear the good arming clothes too…the ones from Areth. More irony, Alistair. And my plate's repaired. All that still doesn't fix how I feel about Areth. He shook his head. Maker, I need to focus. I'm all over the place.

He looked at Liam, who was waiting expectantly. "We'll do it, but I'm telling the companions I pick to accompany us. I want them to be volunteers. I'm not ordering them."

"Thank you. I wasn't sure…."

"I can't watch a possession happen to anyone…not even Morrigan. She's been good to Mel." He smiled, weakly. "And you."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"He's more talented than he realizes," Morrigan said holding one of the vials containing the poison Jowan used on Arl Eamon, "with his Entropy powers, but he is not an herbalist. He did not create these potions."

"I agree." Mel nodded. "How did you get the vials, Teagan?"

"He left them in his room. I confiscated all his belongings."

"Fool. I would have destroyed them." Morrigan shrugged. "More proof that he is not a murderer, I think. Not to mention that one vial has 'antidote' written on it."

"Yes, I noticed that," Teagan said. "You think he speaks truthfully? He did come to poison Eamon, but he thought it would only make him ill. And then he thought the antidote would cure him? But the antidote is more of the same poison?"

" 'Tis true, I fear," Morrigan confirmed. "The second vial is a more potent version of the first, not an antidote. I'm not sure of all the ingredients, but what I can identify would affect the mind, cause palsy, fits and finally unconsciousness." She sniffed the open vial. "Zevran may have some insights. It might be a Crow poison." She looked at Teagan. "He might have recovered from the first dose, but after the second there would be little hope. If he survived he would have been damaged…left with the mind of a small child perhaps."

"Maker. Who would do this?" Teagan paced from one end of Eamon's study to the other.

"Howe." Mel spat the name.

"Not Loghain?" Teagan stopped and faced her.

"Loghain might run him through, or, at worst, make him too sick to come to Denerim." Mel stared at the vial in her hand. "Isn't that what Jowan claimed Loghain told him would happen – Eamon would be ill, but not die? But kill him with poison? And leave another to take the blame? That's not Loghain. That's more like Howe. And Howe does have those two Tevinters. He admits Demetrius, the one who remains at the Vigil, is a mage; I suspect Nicephorus, his notary in Denerim, might be too. Either would have access to Tevinter poisons."

"You make sense, Mel." Morrigan laid the vials down. "They might use ingredients neither you nor I recognize."

"And the man, Rogier, who delivered Jowan here and provided the poison, works for Howe. It means Jowan is guilty of apostasy, blood magic, and poisoning, but not of murder." She rolled her eyes. "That will reassure Liam and Alistair that they did the right thing in conscripting him."

"Surely, if he is not a murderer, he does not deserve death," Morrigan snapped.

"No, he doesn't," Teagan agreed. "I will not cause problems for the wardens as long as he leaves Redcliffe and serves against the Blight. I'll let Alistair and Liam know."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

For the first time since they parted company at Lake Calenhad Docks, the whole company sat in the same room. Food to break their fast covered the table, prepared by the Chantry cook. Mother Hannah had kindly offered a room in the Chantry when Alistair asked. It seemed more private than the castle, he had explained.

"I'm glad to see us all here," Alistair began. "We've all faced difficult battles in the weeks since we left the Doleful Duck."

"Ugh. Alistair, must you remind us?" Leliana's face screwed up in disgust as the group laughed.

"First, we have a new warden. Last night Liam, Taina, Daveth and I held an initiation for Jowan. He is now Warden Jowan. He is the only member of our company who is not here. The…um…initiation is difficult. I gave him leave to sleep this morning.

"Second, you all know I went north on warden business. During the Guardian Landsmeet, Duncan agreed to ask for help from the Nevarran wardens. They arrived. I went north to meet them. They are scouting in the north where they've seen some darkspawn activity in Waking Sea. A troop of mercenaries from Hrothgar's Wrath accompanied them. For now they will remain in the north."

"That's great news, Alistair. How many?" Taina asked.

"Only five, but with a promise of more. We'll have a good complement of wardens," he looked at Taina and Daveth, "and supplies, within in a few months."

"You said Duncan agreed to do this at the Landsmeet?" Leliana asked.

"King Cailan agreed with Teyrn Loghain, that Orlesian wardens accompanied by chevaliers would not be welcome. Nevarran wardens, accompanied by reputable mercenaries, would be."

"So these mercenaries are not Nevarran?" Leliana leaned back crossing her arms. "I though a Nevarran merchant house owned the Wrath."

"They do not represent the Nevarran government. In fact, they are led by a Fereldan and many of the troops are Fereldan or Marcher. Don't confuse Orlesian chevaliers with mercenaries, Leliana. I assure you no Fereldan does."

"He's right," Daveth agreed. "A Wrath merc ain't no chevalier."

Leliana looked at Mel. "And what do you think, Mel?"

"I agree with Daveth. The Wrath are known to work with the wardens in Nevarra. There's darkspawn activity near the mines in the north."

"Who pays them?"

"Usually the wardens, Leliana, or the mine owners," Mel said. "They work together. I don't know who pays these mercenaries. Perhaps King Cailan supplied coin. Neither he nor Duncan are here to ask."

"Enough. They are here. They will help." Alistair leaned on the table. Let's move on before someone asks the other obvious question: Will they attack Howe and try to retake Highever? "The other visit we made in the North was to Kai's Dalish clan. They promised to help us gain support with the larger Brecilian clans. We will still have to enter the Brecilian and meet with the clans, but we won't surprise them.

"Before we do that or visit South Reach, our next mission is a return to Ostagar." He held up his hand. "Let me explain first, then you can ask questions." He waited for them to quiet. "I told some of you, if not all, about meeting with a dying man from Cailan's honor guard. Elric Maraigne told me where he hid a key to Cailan's belongings. There are papers and personal things of his that I would retrieve and take to Dowager Queen Anora and Queen Elin. It's also a chance to test the Darkspawn presence in the area – we will retreat if it's too heavy. And it's on the way to South Reach and the Brecilian…well, not too great a detour.

"After we finish at Ostagar, I want to repeat what we did in Haven. Some of you will go directly to South Reach to scout. We need to know if the town is safe for us. Can we approach Arl Bryland? Arl Teagan will be there ahead of us and provide a contact for you. Bodahn and Sandal will also go directly there and trade. To be safe, I'd like a secluded campsite outside of the town. We'll arrange a meeting place through Bodahn. I know some trails that lead southwest from the West Road." He looked at Taina and Daveth. "You might remember those too."

Daveth chuckled and shook his head. "Who'd a thought I'd consider those better days. We kin find a good site for us all jist like before."

Alistair moved over to the large table on which he had spread his map. He pointed to Lothering.

"It seems the darkspawn pushed north just past Lothering and then turned southwest. The worst reports now come from West Hills, Honnleath and the areas we helped evacuate around Llanberys. I think we can head east on the Imperial Highway almost to Lothering and then turn south. Taina and Daveth followed that route when they retreated, so we'll have guides." He looked around the table. "I'm inclined to have us all go to Ostagar, just in case we need all our numbers in a fight. I don't think we will. I think the darkspawn will have mostly moved on. If I'm right, after Ostagar, we'll split into three groups.

"The scouts will break away and head for South Reach and," he looked around the table again, "a second group will head into the Brecilian to find the Dalish. The rest will remain to recover what we can in Ostagar."

Morrigan leaned near Liam's ear. "Have you not yet mentioned mother?"

"From Ostagar we'll," he looked at Liam, "probe a bit in the Wilds before we head overland to South Reach."

Liam looked at Morrigan who gave an audible sigh, seemingly of relief. Liam stood.

"In summary, if I understand you, Alistair, we all go to Ostagar. Once it's mostly clear of darkspawn, a group of scouts goes to South Reach and another group goes into the Brecilian, with the treaty, to find the rest of the Dalish. The remaining companions stay at Ostagar, scavenge what they can, and then also go to South Reach." He looked around at the nodding heads. "When do we leave?"

"Day after tomorrow. You have the rest of today and tomorrow to get supplies, ready your equipment and pack. We won't get a chance to get supplies again until South Reach. Some of the lands we pass through will be blighted. Extra supplies and water may be needed.

"Those of you going into the Brecilian won't get to South Reach for supplies, but you can hunt, find healing plants and live off the land to conserve what you bring. As far as we know, the land and water are clean. Once you find the Dalish,...well we can hope they provide some hospitality.

"Now, so you know how to prepare, Daveth, Leliana, Shep and Wynne will go to South Reach. Daveth knows the town. I think three humans have the best chance of gathering information." He looked apologetically at the elves and dwarf. "And I want each group to have a warden."

Alistair scanned his companions' faces for reactions, but saw nothing negative. He continued, "Wynne has both healing and some primal spells. Of our mages, she can blend in most easily I think. I'm hoping you stay out of trouble, so no heroics. We just need information.

"The Brecilian is more complicated. As you all know, Kai lives with a Dalish clan. She has contacts and will help us find the larger clans we need. It may be more dangerous and difficult. Taina will lead that group with Kai as her second. Shale, Mel, Niall and Morrigan will go with them." He saw the surprised looks at Niall's name.

"Niall agreed to join us in this, although he is not here now. Liam will help him prepare and pack. We need another healer if we split into three groups," he explained. "The Senior Enchanter, who will teach Conner, has arrived from the Circle. Niall can leave with us and return to assist with Conner after the mission ends. He's curious about the Dalish and hopes to learn from them. He won't do much fighting, but he will heal.

"Liam, Sten, Zevran, Jowan and Warden will remain with me."

"You're probably right, Alistair," Zevran agreed, "to send humans to South Reach. Particularly since Kai has her vallaslin and is needed on the Brecilian mission. And you would be lost without me on your mission."

Mel raised a hand and waited for Alistair to acknowledge her, to the surprise of the others. "But first we all go to Ostagar?"

"I said that, yes."

She nodded. "I…there were Highever troops. I'd like to see what might remain that I could take for their families." I will speak to him about which group I join later. As long as I get to Ostagar. "We should think about doing that for the other troops, too."

"I'll see that we find what we can, if you leave before we finish searching."

Mel frowned, but did not object. I don't want to discuss this in front of the group, but I'm staying to search for signs of Fergus. Kai doesn't need me to find the Dalish. Zev and I can switch. He should be with Kai. The Brecilian could be dangerous.

"So they have not made up," Leliana whispered to Zevran.

"Is that our concern?"

"When it affects the group, of course."

"I don't see it affecting us. Alistair seems quite organized and in charge, yes?"

"Yes." Leliana dipped head in the affirmative. "Mel seems subdued, no?"

"Mel does not lead us."

"You are not concerned for her?"

"Mel is fine."

Leliana gave a huff of frustration, crossed her arms and sat back in her chair.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

A few days later, to Leliana's surprise, once they were on the road, Mel did seem to be fine. She and Alistair no longer shared a tent or watches, as they had after their return from the North, but neither did they argue or avoid each other. In fact, their relationship seemed to have reverted to the slightly edgy camaraderie they had shared after spent most of her time with Morrigan, Kai and Zevran or with Taina and Daveth. She acquiesced to Alistair's commands, but did not hesitate to ask questions or make suggestions. Alistair did not appear to mind when she gently challenged him.

"I thought their feelings were deeper, that such a break up would affect them more," she commented to Wynne.

"You said he objected to her taking so many Ashes. Perhaps they agreed to disagree."

"He overreacted, Wynne. I thought there must be more to it, but it seems not."

Wynne looked at Mell with pursed lips. "It's for the best that they end their liaison. He's too young and inexperienced. She'll only hurt him."

"I…she's his age, I thought."

"But not Chantry-raised, Leliana. He's an innocent. She is not. I fear she uses him."

Leliana looked at Wynne, surprised. "I think she cares for him, Wynne."

"It's simply about lust for her. He will care too much and be hurt; or worse, make poor decisions based on his feelings. She must be used to casual liaisons."

Leliana looked sharply at the Senior Enchanter. She sees me as a sister, not a bard. She would probably think the same of me, if she knew. "Perhaps, that could be true if she served as a mercenary." And I still do not know if she is a Cousland. Only that she can, indeed, sing and play as well as any minstrel. She thought back to one of their last nights in Redcliffe.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Leliana tried to speak with Mel in Redcliffe, but never managed to get the rogue alone. The resulting conversations, carried on amidst the clacking of the looms in the weaving room or the distractions of the garden, with youngsters harvesting vegetables, fruit and seeds under the watchful eye of Mel and two sisters, proved disappointing. Mel's accomplishments as a musician provided the only surprise.

She came upon her one evening playing for Teagan, Liam, Zevran, Taina, Daveth, Kai, and Mother Hannah. Seeing her in the doorway, they motioned for Leliana to join them and she had, out of curiosity. As she took a seat with the group, she noticed Alistair sitting in a window seat alone.

The singing which had drawn Leliana to the courtyard outside the Revered Mother's study had been accompanied by a lute. She found the lutenist was Mel. After Leliana joined the group, Mel switched to a vihuela, an instrument more common in the eastern Marches and Antiva and similar to an Arethian guitar. Its six double strings and hour glass shaped body produced a far different sound than the lute.

Teagan, who had provided the vihuela, turned out to have a lovely baritone, which blended well with Mel's alto. The two of them sang a number of songs. Mel switched back to the lute for a song which Teagan sang alone while Mel played.

My lady may I have this dance

Forgive a knight who knows no shame

My lady may I have this dance

And lady may I know your name

You danced upon a soldier's arm

And I felt the blade of love so keen

And when you smiled you did me harm

And I was drawn to you, my queen

Now these boots may take me where they will

Though they may never shine like his

There is no knight I would not kill

To have my lady's hand to kiss

Yes and they did take me through the hall

To leave me not one breath from you

And they fell silent one and all

And you could see my heart was true

Then I did lead you from the hall

And we did ride upon the hill

Away beyond the city wall

And sure you are my lady still

A night in summer long ago

The stars were falling from the sky

And still, my heart, I have to know

Why do you love me, lady, why?1

Like the others in the room, Leliana sat silently for a moment when the song ended. As the rest began clapping she continued staring at Mel. She said she could play, but I did not think she would prove so accomplished. They must be Fereldan folk songs. I do not recognize them. I must learn that last one. I wonder if it's based on a true tale?

Zevran had turned slightly, to watch Alistair. He remembered this song from Highever and wondered if the warrior did too. By his pained expression, Zev guessed Pippa and Mel must have sung it when he visited.A quick brush of the back of his hand over his cheek erased the sparkle of a tear catching the candlelight. I wish he would forget his worries. He saw Alistair glance at him and blush. If he does not resolve this soon, I think I will become quite angry. Zevran frowned as Mel began to play again.

As if reading Lelianan's mind, Teagan sat beside her, as Mel strummed a melody on the vihuela. "She's good isn't she? It's a Highever folk song. It's said to tell the true story of a Cousland heiress who fell in love with a young knight, the son of a bann. Unlike most such tales, this one seems to have ended happily with them married."

"I wondered, Arl Teagan. Thank you."

"Mel says you sing too. Will you join us? Perhaps you can suggest a song we all might know."

"Please, do Leliana." Mel called. "I know many Orlesian and Nevarran songs. I'm sure we can find one."

"On one condition," Leliana said, smiling. "You must teach me those Fereldan songs and how to use the vihuela. I've never played one."

Mel grinned. "Done. Now what song?"

"Well…in the spirit of happy songs, do you know Tous Les Visages De L'Amour?"

Mel nodded and looked at Teagan.

"I do. A lovely song." He looked at Alistair and smiled. He had noticed the warrior looking uncomfortable towards the end of A Night in Summer Long Ago. I'm glad Leliana suggested this one. He can't blame Mel or me. "Shall we sing in Orlesian or Common?"

"Oh, Common, I think," Leliana said. "The words are so lovely. Teagan, you should take the melody and Mel and I will harmonize."

Mel strummed through the chords and then an introduction. At her nod, Teagan began.

She

May be the face I can't forget

A trace of pleasure or regret

May be my treasure or the price I have to pay

She may be the song that summer sings

May be the chill that autumn brings

May be a hundred different things

Within the measure of a day.

She

May be the beauty or the beast

May be the famine or the feast

May turn each day into a heaven or a hell

She may be the mirror of my dreams

A smile reflected in a stream

She may not be what she may seem

Inside her shell

She

Who always seems so happy in a crowd

Whose eyes can be so private and so proud

No one's allowed to see them when they cry

She may be the love that cannot hope to last

May come to me from shadows of the past

That I'll remember till the day I die

She

May be the reason I survive

The why and wherefore I'm alive

The one I'll care for through the rough and ready years

Me I'll take her laughter and her tears

And make them all my souvenirs

For where she goes I've got to be

The meaning of my life is

She, she, she2

Alistair brushed by Zevran, who had been seated next to the doorway, while the others clapped. Teagan and the two women smiled and bowed, only Teagan noticing his departure. Zevran followed him. Alistair strode down the hallway towards the kitchens, but suddenly turned left and went out into the kitchen gardens. Halfway across the plot, he stopped and sat down on a bench. Zevran approached and sat beside him.

"I don't think Leliana meant to upset you."

Alistair shook his head. "Teagan did though," he gulped. "And Mel, with the first song…about the knight and the lady. She sang that at Highever with Pippa. And stars falling…that means something to us."

"Ah, her horse, she called him Starfall, yes? Or maybe Mel just likes the song, Alistair. Teagan though, I think he made good use of the selections, yes? He sent you a message which you seem to have received."

"I should go…do…something. Have some excuse for leaving."

"Or, we could just sit here and enjoy the night."

"Or I could harvest potatoes."

Zevran, completely perplexed, said, "Potatoes?"

Alistair smiled. "Punishment during my wild youth. Dig up potatoes and peel them for dinner in the Refectory."

"Alistair, you're both concealing your differences well, but…amico…it cannot last. Something like tonight will happen again to you or her."

"Let's see how we get along when we're on the road. Less singing, more marching, you know." I should just speak with her. I don't want the rings back. I want us to be together. What if she wants to return them? What if I've already ruined everything. He looked at Zev. He doesn't think so. He realized Zev was still speaking.

"And no Teagan?"

"And no Teagan."

They sat quietly for some time.

"Zevran, you don't have to be nice to me. Not even for Mel."

"I am not doing it for Mel, Alistair. Not that she did not ask me, but I don't always do as I'm asked."

Alistair choked back a laugh. If she asked him…there's hope for me?

"I do it because, amico, I like you. I think you need a friend. You accepted Kai and me back at the Docks. You did not have to." Zevran shrugged. "You might have died had you not heeded my warning and Kai can be convincing, but, still, you did not have to. More importantly, you continued to accept me. I…that has not happened to me very often. I return the favor. I accept that you have reservations about Mel. I think you're foolish. I hope you work it out, but I accept it."

"Thanks, Zev. I haven't had many friends either. Not ones who know about me. Not," he looked up in alarm, "that I compare my life to yours."

"Alistair, we are not in competition. You have not always had a pleasant life either. Neither of us had choices. Yet, you are you and I am my awesome self and we are friends, yes?"

Alistair smiled. "Yes."

"And now, mio amico, we have choices, too. We must make them and only blame ourselves if we choose wrongly." He reached out and grasped Alistair's forearm. "Follow your heart, Alistair."

9:30 Dragon Solace === On the Imperial Highway

Mel felt a sharp poke in her side just before Kailian appeared next to her.

"What's that for?"

"Suffering in silence, my lady?" Kai whispered.

"I should make a scene with our leader in front of everyone?"

"No, but I know it hurts more than you show. All the plant gathering…alone. I can hear you in your room at night, you know that. Sniffling or screaming into the bolster."

"Some nights I'm sad, other nights I'm angry. S'why I keep the door latched."

"You encourage Zev to talk to him, but you suffer alone?" Kai stopped by the road's edge, arms crossed.

Mel took a few steps and then returned to Kai's side. The others passed by, not questioning, but giving them sidelong glances.

"Kai, we need to keep up. Let's just walk behind them." Mel started out again and Kai joined her.

"Yes, it hurts, but I believe he'll work it out. He just needs some time. I plan to give it to him." She glanced at Kai and took a few steps and then grinned. "And then I'll throw a tantrum, in private."

Kai laughed. "No you won't. You'll be too busy having make-up sex."

"I…we…." Her pursed lips widened into a grin. "I can hope, right?"

"Make sure he talks to Zevran. The least he can do is come up with something new and exciting for you."

"Speaking of your elf…."

"What?"

"I don't think I've ever seen either of you look so…not just happy, but content."

Kai smiled. "I am both happy and content. I'm glad we waited. I was ready to trust a man and he…we renewed a friendship first and then became lovers. It's healing both of us."

"I'm glad. You both deserve it."

"Are you saying we deserve each other?"

Mel grinned. "Why, yes. Yes I am."

Kai sighed. "I am curious how my father, Soris and Shianni will react. But Denerim's a ways away. For now I'll just enjoy what we have. I am a little disappointed he's not going with me to the Brecilian."

"Oh…he is. I have no intention of going with you. I'm staying with Alistair. I'll ask, but even if he says no, Zev and I will switch."

"So what about the no scene?"

"I'm looking for Fergus and that means I need to be with them in the Wilds. Not negotiable."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"This is where we turned off the road, Warden-Commander," Taina said looking around at the bare soil and rock. Here and there a burned tree trunk marked the edge of a once fertile field. "It looks so different now. This was all farmland and forest."

The group stood on a rise and looked over the barren lands. A line of green in the distance promised less blighted land to the south towards the Wilds.

"I think that's the farm where we spent the night over there." Taina pointed to a cluster of burned out shells.

Daveth chuckled. "Yeah, the place the girl and boy wondered if Taina was a dwarf." His smile faded. "I hope they got away."

"That's the Hawke farm," Ser Bryant said. "Rori was in town just before the attack. She planned to leave as soon as she got home."

"We met her, just beyond here on the Highway," Taina said. "Don't know if they left, though."

"Not to be macabre, but we could see if there are bodies," Mel suggested. "Give them a pyre if there are. Or give thanks and hope they made it out, if there aren't."

Taina smiled. "Good idea, Mel. Can we, bo…Warden Commander?"

Alistair scowled, but nodded his head yes. "We need to go in that direction anyway, right?"

"Yeah," Daveth answered. "Head south, south-east over land. It'll get you ta Ostagar through th'army camp."

"Let's go then," Alistair ordered. "It looks like the land's less blighted off the road. Don't take too much time at the farm. We should reach those woods, before we make camp tonight."

"Ya think the darkspawn stuck ta the Highway?"

"To the Highway and the roads. Makes sense. More people to kill near roads."

The group found no bodies at the Hawke farm to Taina, Daveth and Ser Bryant's relief. They hoped that meant the family had escaped the darkspawn completely. They continued south and made camp near a small stream, once they reached the blight-free lands just north of Ostagar. None of the wardens sensed darkspawn nearby, and hoped those they sensed in the distance could not sense them. To be safe one of the wardens stood on each watch. The rest of the company moved about camp quietly, although they did risk a small fire and a hot meal before they slept.

The next morning the group rose early, packed up, ate a cold breakfast and set off. They expected to reach Ostagar by mid-day. The forest around them looked surprisingly normal. Birdsong had greeted them when they woke. Small animals scurried through the underbrush and squirrels chattered at them from tree branches as they passed. Daveth suggested that the streams here flowed north from a part of the Wilds not blighted by darkspawn, unlike the lands to their east and north. For some reason the darkspawn had skirted this swath of forest. The water and, thus the land, remained untainted. It gave Mel hope that Fergus had escaped to an untainted part of the Wilds too.

9:30 Dragon Solace === Ostagar

Alistair sent Morrigan flying ahead to scout, while the rogues spread out on either side of the main company in a skirmish line. They moved quickly, but as quietly as the warriors' plate allowed. Everyone had new or repaired weapons and armor thanks to Bodahn, now on his way to South Reach with Sandal, and the smith in Redcliffe. As they approached the army camp, they began to find the detritus of battle: bones, discarded weapons and equipment, and armored skeletons. Mel searched for Highever and Cousland badges with Kai and Zevran's help. She found nothing until they entered the army camp where the Highever spear and teardrop banner still fluttered from its staff. I'll come back to see what I can find for Pippa. A Cousland banner fluttered nearby, but it was not Fergus' banner or his command tent.

After more than three months, the tents sagged and torn sections flapped in the wind. It seemed the darkspawn had, for the most part, ignored the army encampment. Some of the officers' tents showed signs of looting, but most of the disruptions appeared to be from animals and weather. They found no bodies and little taint or corruption.

The support troops must have fled after Loghain retreated. That's good. Maybe some will make it home.

Alistair kept the group moving through the camp. The wardens had sensed a large group of darkspawn ahead. Morrigan had returned and reported seeing darkspawn wandering through the main camp where the quartermaster, Ash Warriors, mages, Duncan, Loghain and Cailan had their encampments; none of the companions wanted to dally and be caught unawares. They pushed open the gate to the camp's center and crept along a wall to the old temple compound where they finally found their enemy.

Alistair had given them their battle orders the night before. As always, he emphasized that emissaries die first. Ogres should be debilitated by archers and mages before the warriors attack. Rogues should focus on genlocks, while the warriors take on the hurlocks and ogres, unless the rogues can succeed with flank or back stabbing attacks. The mages and archers should divide their efforts, but focus on hurlocks and ogres, once the emissaries were dead. Whenever possible, he stated, allow the rogues to lure a few of the enemy into an ambush, avoiding mass frontal attacks or engaging too many at once. And always, stay clear of darkspawn blood or clean it off.

He emphasized that these tactics had worked for Taina in Honnleath and his own troops in Haven. The group worked well together. This was not their first battle. Wynne and Ser Bryant would fit in. They had seen battle before. Ser Bryant was smart enough not to smite his own mages. Liam helped Jowan.

Their first engagement went smoothly. As they noticed more darkspawn nearby, they decided to lure them into the old temple a few at a time. Once the area seemed clear, the rogues fanned out to loot the bodies, while the mages recovered their mana and the warriors kept watch.

"Get Alistair," Mel snapped to Leliana. She knelt over a hurlock unbuckling a piece of armor and muttering to herself.

Leliana began to protest.

"Now, Leliana."

Annoyed, Leliana decided obeying her would be easier than arguing. She came back with Alistair in tow. Mel handed him a pair of gauntlets.

He paled. "Those are…."

Wynne came up beside Leliana. "Alistair, are those…."

He turned to look at her. "Cailan's. King Cailan's. Yes."

Wynne looked at Alistair as if seeing him for the first time.

"Wynne? Do I have blood on my nose or…."

Alistair had pulled his now long hair back from his face that morning, securing it with a narrow leather thong at his nape. Realizing with a start how much the new style made him resemble Cailan, Mel had intended to suggest he wrap a scarf around his head instead, as sailors did. Before she could find a scarf and offer it to him, however, the group had packed and marched out. Now, watching Wynne's face, she regretted not taking action. She knows. But really what did it matter? Liam, Morrigan, Kai, Zevran and Leliana all knew. It seemed unlikely Wynne or any of the others would try to betray him. Fortunately none of them, besides Taina, have met my mother. Those she thought of as her inner circle, Liam, Morrigan, Zevran, Kai and Taina knew about her, but none of the others did. She returned her attention to Wynne.

"You'll keep them, then?" the Senior Enchanter asked.

"Of course we'll keep them," Mel replied. "Keep them and return them to the Queen and Anora."

"I believe the title is Dowager Queen Anora, Mel," Wynne chided.

Mel rolled her eyes, further annoying Wynne. "I'll keep these, Ali," she said, opening her pack and making space.

He nodded.

The others had gathered around. "We should gather any more pieces of Ca…King Cailan's armor," he said to them all. "It doesn't belong here. Now let's see if we can get through to the mage's encampment. The key Elric buried is near there."

After several sharp battles, the darkspawn had been cleared. The companions huddled in the center of what must have been a pathway. Alistair pointed out Duncan's encampment, directly ahead of them. Beyond Duncan's cold fire, both Loghain and Cailan's tents still stood. To the companions' right, a ramp led up to the hospital area where cots lay tumbled and rotting. Beyond them a skeleton lay in a prisoner's cage. Below the hospital, Warden nosed around the kennels, whining when he found several mabari skeletons. Taina brought him back and he lay curled up next to Shep, still whining.

Once the wardens confirmed they sensed no darkspawn nearby, Taina and Daveth went to the quartermaster's area to see if anything could be scavenged. . Wynne, Niall, Jowan and Leilana returned to the mages camp to find any potions or supplies left behind. The other companions warily searched the grounds around the hospital and Ash Warrior camp.

Mel had not joined the others. She stood next to Shep and Warden, absently scratching her mabari between the ears.

"Liam and I are going to find the chest, Mel. Come with us?"

She looked up in surprise.

"Sure."

"You'll know better than either of us if any of the documents Elric mentioned are important."

"Right. Umm, but you should return them all to Anora."

"We will, but you can tell us if we need to act on any right away." He winced slightly, seeing the disappointment she quickly masked.

"Besides," he said, "I…we…you knew him."

"We knew him."

"Well, I'd like you to be there with me."

She nodded.

They joined Liam and walked to the area near Cailan's tent that Elric Maraigne had described. And there it stood, partially covered by rubble fallen from above, but untouched by the darkspawn.

"It's large."

"It's an armor chest, Liam. Large enough to hold a suit of armor, a sword and a shield," Mel explained.

The two looked at Alistair, who reached into his belt pouch for the key. He stood and stared at the chest, hesitating. Mel touched Liam's arm and shook her head side-to-side when he looked at her. Finally, Alistair leaned down and put the key in the lock. It turned. He lifted the lid. He removed an empty tray which sat on supports above the main compartment. Inside lay a great sword, angled across the interior.

"Ali, that's Maric's sword."

He looked at Mel. "Cailan didn't carry it. I thought he would have."

She wanted to say it's yours now, but he would only argue that it should go back to Anora and Elin. I'll just keep quiet about it for now.

"I thought Elric said there were papers," Liam said.

Alistair shrugged. "He did."

"Let me look?" At Alistair's nod, Mel began feeling around the lid. "There," she said as part of the top panel popped open. Inside, several packets of parchment lay, each bound by a silk cord.

Alistair smiled at her. "Guess that's a lesson. Always bring a rogue." He reached for one of the packets, but stopped. "Maybe we shouldn't read them."

"The seals are broken, Alistair. I think we should, in case, as you noted, it's something that will affect us."

He opened the packet he held, read it, a frown creasing his brow, and handed it to her, saying nothing.

"No surprise then," she said, after reading. "From its crumpled condition I suspect Cailan was not happy when he read it. This was written after the Landsmeet. Eamon knew requests for help would go to Nevarra, not Orlais, yet he still insists here on Orlesian help."

"What Cailan didn't know was that Eamon already had chevaliers at Redcliffe. No wonder he kept asking. He didn't want to send them back to Orlais! Or have Teagan or anyone else see them in the castle." Alistair opened the second parchment and read.

"If Loghain saw this," she waved the first letter from Eamon, "no wonder he wanted Eamon out of the way for a time. He's brazenly ignoring the Landsmeet and his king." She looked at the second parchment. "Is that the one from Celene that Eamon mentions?"

"Yeah, almost ordering Cailan to accept help, if you read between the lines."

"These…well if they don't condemn Eamon as a traitor, they come close."

"This one's personal." Alistair handed the third letter to her.

Mel read the letter, which referred to her own wedding. It expressed Celene's regrets, citing the darkspawn threat as preventing her visit. The note continued offering hope that Cailan, with Orlesian help, would lead his army to defeat the Archdemon. Once the Blight ended, Celene promised her visit could proceed. Celene mentioned how much she looked forward to meeting Crown Princess Elin. She added that her invitation to foster Elin in Val Royeaux remained open. She hoped he would look favorably on his Aunt, Arlessa Isolde, accompanying the princess to Orlais during her stay.

"I don't know how many times Anora and Cailan rejected this notion. As many times as Eamon presented it, I suppose. Maker, but Anora was furious. Poor Cailan, she accused him of supporting it when Eamon didn't stop."

"Is that all, just the three parchments?" Liam felt around the sides of the chest.

Mel made a careful search of the chest, but found no other compartments. "His armor and shield would have taken up the rest of the chest. That seems to be everything."

Alistair stood, dusting himself off. "Let's return to the group, then. We need to decide what we do next. There's more darkspawn beyond the bridge and in the valley." He looked at Mel. "Thanks. I…your being here helps. Keep these for Anora?"

Mel nodded and watched him stride off towards the others seated around Duncan's cold fire pit. Liam followed carrying the sword.

I'm not sure if that means he's accepting me or just shaken by all this. Mel secured the parchments in her pack, before joining them.

A/N: Thank you for reading. If you have time, please review. I appreciate all followers, favorites, kudos and comments.

Thanks to my wonderful betas Kira Tamarion and Elyssa Cousland whose efforts make this a better story. Any errors are mine.

Wow, lots of reviews for the Ch 37: The Treacle Swamp. Thank you for the reviews and comments: Judy, Taeniaea, ChaoticHarmony1991,thinkdragonage, dustywalker,SnowHelm,caraine and Mike3207; Augustus_Featherwing, and onceuponachildhood. Thanks to those who favorited, followed and gave kudos. I hope you continue to read and enjoy.

1 Mark Knopfler, A Night in Summer Long Ago

2 Charles Aznavour and Herbert Kretzmer, She; there are French lyrics, but he released this in English. There are a number of YouTube renditions. It's a lovely song.