A/N: A few new things revealed in this chapter, one having to do with Bella. Can we say foreshadowing?

Dear Diary,

Nathan and I have just returned from shopping. I bought presents for Aunt Rosalie, Aunt Alice and Uncle Jasper. I still haven't gotten anything for Uncle Emmett or my parents or grandparents, but I still have fifteen days. I've been busy with other things so unfortunately Christmas shopping has been pushed to the back burner.

Mom got a promotion at work. Grandpa Carlisle had nothing to do with it. In fact, he didn't even know. One of the sexy new doctors said he wanted her in his ward and since there was no reason she shouldn't go, she did. She is his direct assistant and is super excited, as am I for her.

Dad not so much. He thinks that the doctor just wants to sleep with mom and that's why he promoted her. According to dad, Dr. Thomas thought that mom's unique look was absolutely beautiful and he couldn't wait to "tap it." He said that since he promoted her, she couldn't say no or there would be retaliation. He knows she's married but he doesn't care. In fact, that's one thing that turns him on. The fact that she's unavailable. I wonder if he would care if he found out her husband is a vampire.

Grandpa can't confirm if dad is right or not. After all, he can't read minds. But he did say that Dr. Thomas has a flawless reputation at the hospital and even saved newborn twins when they were born prematurely. Grandpa Carlisle has nothing but respect for Dr. Thomas, but loves his son and is keeping what dad said in the back of his mind. He will observe Dr. Thomas's actions.

Mom scoffs at the idea. Even though she's beautiful, she still doesn't see herself clearly. They thought that had changed when she was changed, but old habits die hard. Now that she's "an old, married mother," she feels undesirable. Aunt Rosalie pointed out that she may feel old but she doesn't look it. "We all feel old some days Bella," she told her. "But I can guarantee that you look nineteen and your husband thinks the world of you. Surely, destroying four bed frames should be a sign that you are desirable." See, this is one of those times when I don't mind that mom and dad have sex.

So, we'll see how Dr. Thomas turns out. If he tries anything, he'll get a rude awakening. It might be fun to watch.

Brb, laundry….

I am such an idiot! I didn't see the blue bra that I threw into the machine with my white load. Now everything has a blue tint! Aaaahhhhh! See, this is why Christmas shopping has been delayed. It's crap like this that keeps happening to me!

Thank God my cheerleading outfit wasn't in there. Course, it's not blue, but still. I don't even want to think what Kaitlyn would say if she saw it ruined…or the coach. I could hear the teasing now and it would never stop. Well, at least not while I'm at Forks High School. Luckily, my outfit is already clean and hanging in my locker at school.

Speaking of cheerleading, I hurt someone. It wasn't on purpose, but it happened. One of the girls was on my shoulder and I gripped her ankle to help her get down and she started screaming. Again, I didn't know my own strength. Leslie of course was immediately on the defense, saying that I've been lifting weights everyday and working out incessantly to be a better cheerleader. The coach bought that and I offered to pay for any doctor's bills. Small price to pay for silence.

I am quite grateful to Leslie. Ever since she discovered my secret, she has been ensuring that it's kept. She really doesn't have to go to that extreme, I believe her. If I didn't she wouldn't be my friend. Hell, if I didn't believe her, she'd probably be dead.

But I appreciate the effort. Anytime there's a suspicion, she's there to quell it. Sally did that a lot when she found out but it quickly died down. Leslie will too. But I am glad to know that she really is my friend. I was worried that when she found out what I was, she wouldn't want to be anymore. That she would think I'm a freak, like so many others. Like Sally, however, she has proven me wrong. And I'm thankful for that.

What else? I'm spending the entire weekend with Jacob at the reservation. This was not my idea but I'm actually looking forward to it. I haven't seen Jacob in awhile and I want to spend time with him. I may allow a bit of making out, but it won't go too far. Like I said, his kisses are amazing, but so are Nathan's.

Nathan was less-than-enthusiastic when he heard that. But he knew he couldn't stop me. He knows me well enough that I am my mother's daughter; I inherited stubbornness from her. When mom wanted to see Jacob, she went and saw him. Dad wasn't happy about it, but they weren't married at the time. He perceived Jake as a threat. And back then, he was. Now if she goes to see him, it's purely a friendship thing. Most of the time, he talks about me. Dad told me to give Nathan a break; he probably feels the same way. "If the woman I loved was visiting a rival, I couldn't stop worrying. It wasn't just the fact that he was a werewolf, it was that I could read his thoughts. He did whatever he could to try to sabotage our relationship. Jacob knows about Nathan; he probably feels a sense of déjà vu. Nathan is worried. Please give him a break."

I started to get upset, telling dad that I haven't made the decision to be with him. He said he understood and wasn't telling me whom to be with. Then he told me something that floored me: he liked Nathan. I never thought that would happen. Both he and mom didn't seem happy when I started seeing him, but apparently that apprehension has passed. I asked him why and he said he read Nathan's mind. Nathan told him something important and that satisfied him. When I asked what that was, he shook his head. "Not for me to tell," he said and pulled me into a hug. "But trust me, you'll like it."

So now I'm wondering what that's about. I asked Aunt Alice what she saw for me but she refused to say anything. "I promised your dad." Dammit! Everyone knows me too well. I think one of my New Year's resolutions will be to catch people off-guard. To do things that are unpredictable and to have fun with it. If I decide that I want to sleep with Jacob, I will and have no regrets. If I decide to sleep with Nathan, I will. If he wants me, that is.

He hasn't made any efforts to take our relationship further and I'm starting to worry. Perhaps he's changing his mind. Perhaps Alice told dad what she saw and he got to Nathan first. Perhaps I need to just chill.

That sounds good actually. I think I'll take a nice, warm bath and just let all of the stress of late melt away. After all, how much can one teenage half-vampire endure?

A/N: Any idea what Nathan told Edward?

Thanks for reading! I hope to get the next chapter up in a few days. And don't worry, there's some Nessie-Nathan lovin' coming!