Chapter 36
Dean looked her in the eye, he leaned brushed his lips across hers. She shivered, and then she was back to reality. "I can't" she whispered on his lips. Dean closed his eyes and whispered, "Can't or won't?" She turned her head and felt his grip loosen and then he was off of her. She sat up and looked up at him. "I'm sorry." she said as she opened her hand. He grabbed his keys, "Me too." She watched him as he walked out the door. She fell back on the bed looking up at the ceiling. She slammed her fist on the bed. "Fuck!"
Jade woke up around 8am. Jumped in the shower and headed to the kitchen. Jeans, t-shirt, barefoot, glasses and hair in a towel. It was quiet she was hoping to be the first up. She stopped as she got to the kitchen, Dean was sitting at the counter drinking coffee, looking at the detailed map of the town they were gonna be heading to. He didn't even look up when she walked past him to the coffee maker. He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. He loved the way she smell. The lavender scent of her soap mixed with smell of the perfume he bought her. He shook his head and was back to the map. "Morning." she said as she leaned on the counter with her coffee. Without turning around, "Morning." She knew by his tone, he was pissed about last night. She shook her head and sat at the desk area. Opened her laptop and checked her e-mails. After a half hour of silence, it was broke. "Good morning." Jo said with a smile. She was still up when Dean came out of Jade's room, and went straight to his. She could feel the tension between them. Dean looked up at her and smiled, "Good morning." Jade clenched her jaw. He cheated and now he is pissed at her. She smirked and closed the laptop. "I have a few errands to run. Just tell Lexie to rest today. I'm gonna take care of it." Dean didn't respond. Jo smiled as she sat next to Dean, "I sure will."
After about an hour of Dean ignore Jo's attempt at flirting, Ellen and Bobby made their way downstairs. Then Sam and Lexie. Dean stood and fixed another cup of coffee. Lexie was leaned against the counter with hers. "Jade said she was gonna run the errands today. Let you relax." Dean said as he leaned and kissed her cheek. "Good, me and Sam have some shopping to do, right, Sam?" she looked at Sam and smiled. Sam looked at Lexie and smiled, "Yes, baby shopping. So excited." he said joking. "I need to go to town to pick up some supplies." Bobby said. "Me and Jo will ride with you. Stock up on girl stuff." Ellen replied. Jo looked at her mother, "I'm good. I'm just gonna hang out here." Jo knew if she stayed that would leave her and Dean alone. And so did Ellen. She glared at Jo, "You are going with us." Ellen patted Dean on the back. "Besides, Dean looks like he could use a little peace and quiet." Dean nodded a silent thank you. He went to his room as the others got ready to leave. He laid on the bed looking at the ceiling. Thinking. He hated how uncomfortable he was around Jade this morning. He hated his self for being so short with her. What ever this was between them was killing him. She just wanted to be friends. Which normal would be fine with him. But now, he didn't know how to be with her. He opened his eyes when he heard voices. Everybody was back. He looked at his watch, 5pm. He sat up on the bed and rubbed his face. He slept all day. He stood and made his way to the bathroom. After brushing his teeth and washing his fade he headed to the dining room. "Good morning, Sleeping Beauty." Lexie said. Dean sat at the empty chair, in between Jade and Jo. "I can't believe I slept all day." Ellen handed him a beer, "You needed it. I heard you up at 3am. Did you even sleep last night?" He took a drink of his beer and shook his head. "Why don't we go grabbed some dinner before me and Jade go to work. I am in the mood for Logan's." Jade leaned back in the chair, "That sounds good. Let's go."
They all laughed and talked as they ate dinner. Jade sat across the round table from Dean. When he would look at her, she would smile. At first he would look away, but eventually he gave in and smiled back. Jo did everything she could to get Dean's attention. And he did everything to block her out. As they walked out Dean held the door for everyone, Jade was last. And walking across the parking lot, without thinking, he placed his hand on the small of her back. And she let him. The ride back was quiet. The guys up front the girls in the back. When they got out everybody headed for the house, except Jade. She headed for her car. Dean turned back to her, "Where are you going?" "I am going to the bar, just to check on things." He nodded and walked in and joined the others.
Jade was gone a couple of hours and instead of going in the house, she went to the old pasture behind the barn. She wasn't out there long before she heard someone in the barn. And then someone else. It was Dean and Ellen. "How long are you two going to play the silent game?" Ellen asked. Dean looked up at her, "What are you talking about?" She smirked, "You know damn well what I'm talking about. I wish you two could see the two of you together like we do." Dean wiped his hands on an old rag, "I fucked up royally this time, Ellen. I should have called her one of those thousands of times I picked up the phone, but my pride wouldn't let me. I have lied and cheated. She doesn't even look at me the same. How do you look at the person you love and tell yourself it's time to walk away?" Ellen grabbed his hand and smiled, "You don't." Dean shook his head. "She looks at you just as she always has, we all see it, your guilt just doesn't let you see it. So, you made a mistake, you swallow your pride, get that ego in check, and you fix it. Take it from me, don't let anything go unsaid. We are not gareented tomorrow. I regret everyday that the last conversation me and Bill had was an argument." She kissed his cheek, "What is the worse that could happen?" He watched her walk back to the house, then bent back over the trunk. Jade turned to walk into the barn, then she heard someone else. "Why are you out here all alone?" Jo asked. Then Jade knew who was out there. Dean was checking everything in the trunk, making sure everything was in place. "Just double checking everything." She leaned on the wrecked side of the Impala as he was bent over in the trunk. Jade sat in the old chair and just listened. "So, couple more days until we kill the devil, what are you plan on doing? You know, could be our last days on earth and all." Jade rolled her eyes, talk about desperate. "Go over the plan in my head. And drink. That's about it." he said still bent over the trunk. "That's it? No mind blowing sex?" Dean stood up and looked at her, "If so, the only person good enough for the job, is not speaking to me. So, no." Jo turned and stepped to him, "I think I can take care of it. And I promise no smart ass remarks, criticizing, just us." she said as she rubbed his chest. Dean moved her hands, "Your right, she is a smart ass, she irritates the shit out of me. And she knows what buttons to push and sometimes I could choke her. But if this is our last two days on earth, she is the only person I want to spend it with. Even if she isn't speaking to me." He closed the trunk and walked past Jo to the house and to the shower. "Bitch" Jo said to herself as she made her way to the house and to bed. Jade wiped the few tears from her face and walked into the house. Everyone was in bed. She changed in to her shorts and tank and went back to the kitchen.
Dean was leaning against the counter, drinking water, wearing just a pair of basketball shorts. She grabbed a bottle of water and sat at the counter. "I lied to you." Dean said. She looked at him and raised his eyebrows. He cleared his throat, "When you ask me about my hallucinations at the end." She begin to peel the label from her bottle, "I know that." "Lilth, I saw Lilth and I heard hellhounds. I can't go back again." Jade propped her head on her hand and looked at him, "Do you regret anything between us?" she asked. He looked at her and was quiet for a few seconds, then shook his head. "Not one single regret. I would choose you every time." She smiled, "Me too. I couldn't have stopped it if I tried." He smiled back and took a drink of his water. After a few minutes of silence, she stood. She stood next to him on her tiptoes and he looked in her eyes. She smiled and kissed his cheek, "I wouldn't have missed it. I'm going to bed." He watched as she walked down the hall. She stopped and turned back to him. He looked at her, she smiled. "Are you coming?" He smiled and sat down his water and walked to her. He kissed her then said, "Let me lock up." She smiled as she made her way to the bedroom.