WITH OR WITHOUT YOU

Thanks to kissme (thank you so much for your effort! But I'm sorry, I can't tell you nothing about the secret admirer… yet! I wish I could accept the chocolate cookies, but even for that, I can tell you nothing… sorry!), twistedstellar, Dreary Days, rose, grimmauld, nichole-sumpter, Chantal J, my1-and-only, Norie Ape1, Sayaku-chan, puderschick, USAgal (welcome back!), scarlet-knight13, Lady-Angelina (hum... you made me read my own fic, you know? I won't tell you to discard the possibility of Hermione's secret admirer being a Ravenclaw, but I can tell you that he's not Anthony Goldstein! There's no character in my fic with that name… I think your friend mistook my fic with another… anyway, this I can assure you: he's not Anthony Goldstein! By the way, nice to see you reviewed again! Thanks!), danny (welcome back!), nightmistrie (2moro sounds good to me...), Smiles28, rgFaNaTiC (welcome back!), Crazy Writer (please, be merciful! I know I'm late but don't throw those snakes at me, please?), daniel-radcliffes-girl (please, don't be disappointed at me...)and RenegadeMustang (500th review, huh? Thank you!) for the reviews!

This time I have special thanks to Marmalade Fever, who kindly corrected this chapter for me! Really really thank you!

I'm really glad that you didn't get mad at me 'cause of the last chapter! And I was gladly surprised by so many reviews saying that it was a really good chapter! Thanks a lot to you all! You're the best!

Here's another chapter! Just hope you like it too! Cheers!

Chapter XXXVIII

"I can't believe it!" Hermione placed her hands over her mouth when she realized that she had yelled.

"Shush! Do you want everybody to hear you?" Ginny said quickly, but still smiling.

It was almost midnight. Both were seated on Hermione's bed. The lights were off; they were using Ginny's wand to illuminate the room.

"You both really were convincing at hiding it, you know? We could never have been able to tell that you kissed each other by seeing your faces when you arrived for dinner. It seemed like you had argued again".

Ginny tried to suppress her laughter. "I'm glad it worked. I knew I could do everything right, but Harry is a total klutz, so I was worried whether he could make it or not, but he was all right."

Hermione hugged her. "I'm really glad that you finally got together".

She hugged her back. "Thanks, Hermione." They released each other. "You know… we started arguing 'cause of you. You know that, right?" Ginny blushed slightly.

Hermione smiled. "Yes, Harry told me. I just can't understand why you were so jealous of me. I told you several times that Harry and I are only friends."

"I know, but Harry was always so worried about you and you started to do everything together… I just don't know what crossed my mind… especially 'cause I knew all the time that you're in love with Malfoy and…"

"Don't repeat that, please," Hermione said, harshly.

Ginny looked at her, surprised. "But it's true. You can't deny it to me. Hermione, I really think that you should think about it. I… even I can't believe that I'm going to say what I'm about to say but… I think you should fight for him."

"WHAT?" She placed her hands over her mouth again. "Are you insane? Did you hear yourself?"

"Yes, I did. And I said I couldn't believe that I was going to say that. But even I can't deny it; you're in love with each other. I know who he is, I know he hates muggle borns, I know he's a crook, a jerk, a scoundrel… and I know he has to marry a pureblood… but, most of all, I know he loves you and that you feel the same about him. Hermione, true love doesn't happen twice in life, and I think that, if yours is true, you can surpass any obstacle. Don't let it escape from your hands. Please, Hermione." Ginny caught Hermione's hands in hers and looked into her eyes.

Hermione smiled faintly. "I know everything you said is true, Ginny, but what can I do if he doesn't accept me as I am? He would never fight his family and his beliefs 'cause of me. Do you really think Malfoy is that kind of person? He's imprisoned in his own world and there's no place for me in it."

"That's why I'm saying you should fight. You have to fight for a place in his world and he already opened the door for you. You just have to have the courage to get in."

Hermione sighed. "I don't know, Ginny. Malfoy… I can't fight against centuries of tradition. The Malfoys are so drowned in their own glory… I'll only get suffocated with them".

Ginny smiled. "You don't have to… as long as you take Malfoy out of it." She hugged her. "Think about it, please".

"Alright, I'll try. Now, it's time to sleep. Tomorrow's New Year's Eve and I bet your mum will get us out of bed early." She slapped Ginny's back, slightly.

Ginny released her and jumped out of her bed. "You're right". She patted down her blankets. "Good night, Hermione". The light of her wand faded.

"Good night, Ginny." Hermione turned on the bed, lying on her left side, her back to Ginny. Fight, huh? Now that she's happy she thinks all the problems in the world can be solved. Malfoy is fighting against it, why should I fight for it? He's going to marry his pureblood fiancée and I'll go on with my life and that's it. She breathed deeply. Anyway, how can love survive through so much hate? She shook her head, trying to clear her mind. She wanted to sleep without thinking about him ever again…

"Hurry! Or you'll miss the train!" Molly yelled at them in front of the London Train Station.

"Damn! I can't believe we already have to go back to school!" Ginny said angrily, pulling her trunk from the car. "If only we could use magic to carry our things… stupid muggles!"

"Ginny! Watch your mouth!" Arthur said, pointing a finger at her face. "Anyway, kids, I don't want to be rude, but I have to take the car back to the ministry. I don't want to cause problems for Laurel, so could you hurry up?" he said, worried.

"Alright, dad, alright! OUCH! DAMN! FU…"

"RON WEASLEY!" Molly screamed horrified. "Don't you dare say such a word again!"

He looked at her, eyes full of tears. "Oh, c'mon, Mum! It hurts! Do you want me to prove it to you?"

She looked at him dangerously. "It's your fault that your trunk ended up falling on your feet. If you were more careful it wouldn't have happened," she said, severely.

"If dad was not in such a hurry it wouldn't have happened!" he said, passing a hand over his left foot.

"Don't complain!" She looked at the others. "Everybody's ready?"

"Yes, Mrs. Weasley." Hermione was the last one to take out her things from the car.

"You're free to go, Arthur." She smiled to him.

"Will you be all right? Are you sure you don't need me to help?" he said, looking at the kids, who were all too worried about their things to pay attention to him.

"Don't worry, Arthur. Everything will be fine".

"You'll apparate from the platform, right?"

"Yes". She placed a kiss on his cheek. "And you, please, be careful. We don't know when or who they will attack."

He said nothing, just smiled at her. "Hey, everyone!" They looked at him. "Be careful there, alright?"

They smiled. "Don't worry, Mr. Weasley, we will be." Harry said trying to calm him.

"Well then…" he waved "… see you later!" He got in the car and told the driver to go back to the ministry.

Although they were late, they waited for the car to turn at the next street. "Oh my God! Let's go! Let's go! Or else you will miss the train!" She started pushing them.

"Calm down, Mum!" Ron said impatiently.

"I wonder if there's still an empty cabin somewhere in this train." Hermione sighed.

"I really don't know why we always end up getting here late. Excuse me." Ginny made her way through a small crowd of students that were standing in the corridor. The others followed. Harry was right behind her, Hermione was coming right after him and Ron was the last of the line.

"Let's try the back of the train. We always found an empty cabin there," Harry said, hopeful.

"Did you see Lavender?" Ron asked looking everywhere.

"You're the tallest among us. If you haven't seen her yet, it's obvious that we haven't seen her either. Excuse me, please." Ginny was getting impatient with the students that were filling the corridors.

After a few minutes of fighting they finally found a cabin at the very back of the train. It wasn't exactly empty. There were valises and other small things like that.

"They should know that the cabins are not the luggage car," Ginny said, angrily, pushing a huge rucksack aside.

Harry and Ron placed the other things on the ground and cleaned the seats. Hermione sat at the window, on the left, where she could see the door. Ron sat at her side. Ginny and Harry sat on the other side, right in front of them.

"I wish we could stay a little more at Grimmauld Place. We had fun, didn't we?" Ginny asked, looking at Ron and Hermione.

"Yes, it was really nice. But going back to school is also a good thing."

Ron sighed. "Only you would say a thing like that, Mione." He glanced at Harry then at Ginny. "When will you finally grab my sis' hand, Harry, and stop acting like we don't know what's happening?"

Both blushed hard. Ron sounded serious, but they could tell by his eyes that he was laughing inside. "W-what are you talking about, Ron?" Ginny said her brother's name, but she was looking at Hermione.

"I know you already shared a few kisses during holiday, so why are you pretending to us that nothing happened? Mum and Dad are not here, you know."

"Her-hermione?" Ginny was so ashamed that it was getting difficult to talk.

She tried to suppress her laugh. "Ginny, I said nothing, believe me".

"Harry told me, right, Harry?" Ron smiled evilly.

Ginny turned to him, eyes wide open. "You did?"

Although it seemed impossible, Harry blushed even more. "Don't… don't look at me like that. You told Hermione, didn't you?"

"Yes, but she's my friend". She sounded like it was obvious.

"And Ron is my friend, although he's your brother, too".

"I have to say that I just loved the attic scene. And you, Hermione?" He turned to her.

"Well, since you mentioned it, I loved it too" They laughed.

"YOU TOLD ABOUT IT, TOO?" they said in unison.

"C'mon, guys, we're just kidding, ok?" Ron laughed. "But, you know, it's kind of a little revenge for me, making fun of you."

"Revenge?" Harry sounded confused.

"Would you mind being clearer?" Ginny looked at him dangerously.

"Of course! Do you think I forgot how much you laughed at me when Snape caught me and Lavender at the ball? Now it's my turn, simple as that."

"You really are mean, Ron." Hermione smiled.

"Nah! I'm a good guy, honestly." He turned to Harry and Ginny again. "Alright, I'll make it easier for you. I'm going to look for Lavender so you guys don't need to be worried about the big bro being here." He stood up and walked towards the door, but then stopped beside Harry and placed a hand on his shoulder. "But don't forget what I said to you when you told me that you and Ginny were together. I'm serious." He blinked and left.

"You didn't tell me he knew." Ginny sounded disappointed.

"You didn't tell me that Hermione knew too," he said, a little bit angry.

"Relax!" Hermione yelled at them. "I thought you both were more mature. Now I think I'm mistaken."

They didn't continue, but Harry grabbed Ginny's hand.

Hermione tried hard not to laugh. "But tell us, Harry, what did Ron say to you?"

"Yeah, I'm curious, too." Ginny was more relaxed now.

Harry smiled. "You won't believe it. It was really hard for me not to laugh in his face." He cleared his throat and said, solemnly, "But be aware that, if you break her heart, I'll break your legs."

Both girls laughed and Harry followed.

"Ron is really a funny guy". Hermione dried her eyes.

"I just can't imagine…" Ginny stopped when she heard the sound of the door opening. All three looked at it and they didn't seem to be happy when they saw who was getting in.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" Malfoy said, looking at Ginny and Harry holding hands. He leaned against the wall, Crabbe and Goyle right behind him.

Hermione thought that her heart was going to jump from her mouth. Stop that! Although it was really hard for her, she kept looking at him.

Draco turned to her. "What a pity, Granger. It seems that Potter dumped you cause of your best friend. Tisk, tisk, what a nasty thing to do. We really can't trust those closer to us, can we? But tell me, what is it like to have a broken heart?" He smirked.

She looked directly into his eyes. "Why are you asking me that, since you already know what it's like?"

Draco felt his legs go weak for a moment. Crabbe and Goyle looked at him stupidly, trying to understand the meaning of Hermione's words. Ginny and Harry just smiled at him, evilly. He took a few moments to organize his thoughts. "I don't know about what you're talking about! A broken heart? Me? Are you hallucinating?" He laughed nervously. His cronies imitated him.

"Oh, yeah, I'm sorry!" Hermione said gladly. "I forgot that you buried your heart somewhere. If I'm not mistaken, it was you who said once… hum, just a minute… yeah, you said 'when you let the heart decide everything, you're searching for your own fall,' exactly that. But, you know, I think you should take a look at your heart one of these days, 'cause, even if it's buried, it can still be broken… and I think yours is." Her head was aching, her heart was pounding and, more importantly, she couldn't stop asking herself why she had said all of that.

Malfoy was trembling. It was freezing, but he began to sweat. His fists were clenched and all he wanted to do was punch Granger 'til she lost consciousness. He wanted to punch her 'til she fell in his arms. He wanted to punch himself 'til he fell at her feet. It was getting difficult to breath. "Yes, Granger, I buried my heart. I buried it so deep that even I don't know where it is now. So, even if it's broken, like you said, how should I know? It's not with me. I threw it away. I threw it away!" He punched the wall.

Hermione, without thinking, stood up. "And why did you throw it away! Huh, Malfoy?" She asked, looking into his eyes.

He sustained the stare. "Don't ask me something you already know… you filthy mudblood!"

Harry stood up and stopped right in front of him. "Get out!"

Hermione didn't expect him to call her that. She was so surprised that for a second she didn't know what to do. It hurt, but she pretended she didn't care about it. "That's ok, Harry."

Malfoy smirked. "Now that you dumped her, what's the point of pretending to be her bodyguard, huh, Potty?"

Harry pushed him hard. If Crabbe wasn't in the way, Malfoy would have ended up in the middle of the corridor. "You don't know what friendship is, so it's useless to say anything to you! Get out of here!"

"Harry!" Hermione grabbed his arm. "Enough! That's ok! You know I don't care about what he thinks of me!"

"Bullshit!" Oops! He looked at Hermione, worried.

Malfoy was also looking at her, totally confused.

"I…" she turned from Harry to Malfoy "… I… why… why don't you ever believe me, huh…" she turned to Harry again "… Harry? No matter how many times I tell you this, you won't believe me!" She released him. "Don't use me as an excuse to punch him." She pointed at Malfoy, but kept looking at Harry. "How many times do I have to say that he's nothing to me?" She breathed heavily. She lowered her eyes. If I look at him now, I'll betray myself.

Harry relaxed. "I'm sorry, Hermione."

Draco didn't know what to think. First she tried to make him speak about his feelings and now she yells that I'm nothing to her. He looked at her furiously, but she didn't repeat the look. "Damn you, Hermione Granger!" He punched the wall once more, glanced at Harry and left the cabin, pushing Crabbe and Goyle on the way.

"Are you ok, Hermione?" Harry closed the door.

She sat again. "Yes, I am." She looked at him. "I can't believe you said that."

He sat beside Ginny. "I'm sorry. I didn't think".

Hermione sighed. "That's ok, never mind."

"Hermione, I can't believe you said those things to him," Ginny said, almost happily.

"What things, Ginny?" she sounded tired.

"Oh, c'mon! About his broken heart!"

"Ah, that… it just slipped out of my mouth. Just like Harry, I didn't think to talk, that's all".

"Hermione, did you think about what I said that night?"

Hermione smiled. "Yes, Ginny, and I concluded that it's useless."

"Hey, what are you talking about?" Harry asked, a little impatient.

"Nothing, Harry, girlie business." She then turned to the window.

"Let's leave her with her thoughts for awhile, Harry," Ginny whispered.

He just nodded.

There was nothing to see outside, just the snow falling.