The 29th Adventure Of Larry The Imaginary Plastic Bag: The Last Pirate Adventure

"What are ya'll waiting for? Get your treasure." The female Elvis impersonator asked those who were not pirates.

"No thank you." Jareth replied. Dog growls could be heard coming from the pirates swimming in the treasure pile. "I'd rather not get rabies." A dog squeal rang out followed by howling. ?WE watched the pirates fight for treasure. It was disturbingly amusing.

"I've got to go now." Hercules got on Pegasus and they flew away. The Fireys were playing body poker.

"What are you?" damsel-in-stress finally asked the question we all wanted to ask the strange woman.

"I'm a foxy lady." She said and did a dance. After that we just ignored her until she left. A final howl and the pirates walked back with torn clothes and guilty expressions. One pirate was missing.

"Did you have fun?" I asked Captain Jack.

"Sorry ya had ta see that luvs." The band of pirates, now wearing rings, necklaces, and jewels hung their heads in shame.

"All the respect I had for you is now gone." Norrington shot.

"That was bit harsh." Damsel-in-stress said.

"Let us go back on the ship and go somewhere else." We all get back on. Jarth and I held hands and transported us back to the ocean.

"Patrick!"

"Hmm?"

"It's back!"

"I believe this ship of yours is a figment of your imagination."

"But look."

"Alright SpongeBob. I'll look just to prove you- hey! There really is a ship!"

Meanwhile…

"What are we to do now?" asked a new pirate who doesn't have a name yet. I think I'll call him Sparky.

"We wait." Captain Jack responded.

"For what?"

"Me bloomin 'ead ta explode!"

"Temper, temper. Take deep breaths and count to ten." Larry TIPB said as he recovered from being unconscious. Captain Jack does this and the pretty purple color that was on his cheeks left.

"So long Jack" the pretty purple shouted over its shoulder.

"Er, aye." Captain Jack said wondering if damsel and I switched his rum with Root beer again.

"Rum needs to be capitalized too. It's also an important drink." Captain Jack says over looking over my shoulder.

"Alright."

"We could take a nap. I'm tired." I suggested.

"Ye can do that. What of the rest of us?"

"Try to teach the monkey to fly. I don't know. G-day." I yawned and walked away to my cabin.

"Well we could-" damsel stopped, "Is that a llamacorn?" she said pointing a funky looking mutant animal.

"I have never seen such a weird looking creature." Norrington made a move to go toward it.

"I have. I once saw an albino tigercorn with wings. But that was in the Underground. I had no idea that strange animals were anywhere else." Jareth said.

"Gnraaaww." Said the llamacorn and trotted off. Norrington was moving slowly towards it.

"I think you should quit following it. Llamas are known to spit in faces." Damsel informed Norrington.

"How are we supposed to get off the ship?" Norrington asked.

"I could make it go somewhere else if it is bothering you." Jareth replied.

"Uh, help!" Larry TIPB squeaked as the llamacorn tried to devour him. Jareth took out a crystal ball and threw it at the llamacorn. It disappeared.

"Are ye fine?"

"Yes." Larry had holes where the teeth crunched down. Deliciously Gorgeous healed him. Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"I'm bored!" damsel moaned.

"Rum?" Captain Jack held out a bottle.

"Nah."

"Suit yerself." He shrugged and gulped down the contents of the bottle.

"It's showtime!" a voice echoed. "Hi babs! Miss me?" It was Beetlejuice he came back!

"Oh my Spock!" damsel-in-stress gave the ghost a big hug that would crush the living. "What are you doing back here?"

"Well, after all the adventures we had, the Nietherworld just didn't seem as exciting as it once was. I decided to come back." BJ awkwardly patted damsels head.

"It is kind of boring without you." Jareth said.

"Well be bored no more." BJ laughed knowing that the line Jareth just said held much innuendo if you read it wrong or if you have a dirty mind like himself. You perverts! Shame on you! Oh well, I guess we are all perverts at heart.

"What's going on here?" I asked. I rubbed my eyes. My hair was tousled from sllep and sticking out in every direction.

"Babs!" BJ floated over and kissed me on the lips.

"Eeeeewww!" I cried now awake and green. I gagged a few times. BJ tried to look hurt but was ruined because he was cackling. The rest of us were laughing as well. We calmed down and sat on the deck in a circle. We were trying to decide what to do.

"Hunt monsters?" Captain Jack suggested.

"There are no more around."

"Let's play Truth Or Dare!" Larry TIPB shouted.

"How does one play?" Norrington inquired. We explained how it worked.

"So let's get started. Who goes first?" damsel asks.

"I guess I'll go first." Larry TIPB, the brave says.

"Truth or dare."

"Dare."

"I dare you to dress up like a chicken." Larry TIPB dons a chicken costume and clucked for effect.

"Alright, truth or dare." Larry TIPB says to Mr. Gibbs.

"Truth."

"Is it true that you are really that superstitious or is it just a cover up for being incredibly smart?"

"I am incredibly smart." He says. "Jack, truth or dare."

"Dare mate."

"I dare you to quit drinking for an entire day." Mr. Gibbs smirks.

"Ye mean fer 24 hours?" we all wait in suspense for his answer. "I suppose I could." He twitches a little. "Jareth, truth or dare."

"Dare."

"I dare ye ta put on a different pair of pants. Some that aren't too, ah, tight." Jareth goes to his cabin and changes his clothes. He comes out wearing a black t-shirt that says 'It takes a real man to wear glitter,' and black baggy cargos. His hair is still how it always is. Damsel and I stare in awe.

"DethRose, truth or dare."

"I dare you to write a poem about me." He says with a smirk.

"Hmm…It will take me awhile to think of one."

"You can still play the game and think of later on."

"I think that would work best." I reply. "Damsel, truth or dare."

" Dare."

"I dare you to smell Captain Jacks boots."

"Ew, gross!" I'll do it." Captain Jacks takes his boots off and hands them over to damsel. She smells them and runs to the side of the ship and heaves. We laugh as she comes back. "Truth or dare Norrington."

"Truth."

"Is it true that you like me?" she bats her eyelashes at him.

"Yes." He blushes.

"My turn my turn!" BJ bounces on his bottom.

"Alright truth or dare."

"Dare."

"I dare you to take a bath."

"No! Anything but that!" he screams and turns into a mouse.

"you have to do it."

"No."

"The rule is that you have to do it."

"I'd rather die than take a bath."

"Uh, you're already dead. Now you really have to."

"Grr…fine." He leaves and enters a bathroom and takes a bath. We wait for him to return. He did take a bath. Now he smells like eucalyptus and spearmint and deodorant. He even changes his cloths and brushed his hair. Instead of being dirty blond, his hair was almost white. He wears a scowl and refuses to join our game. We continue for a while then quit when the sun was setting. I start on my poem and fall asleep. I awake when the sun is up and write some more. Someone knocks on my door.

"Come in." I say. It is Jareth.

"Are you finished with my poem?" he asks me.

"I started on it last night but fell asleep. I'm sorry."

"There is no hurry. Take your time." He leans over my shoulder to read what I have written so far. "Very good." He smiles and gives me hug and leaves me to write more. Four hours later, I hear someone tapping, tapping at my chamber door.

"Come in." It was Jareth again with a tray of food. There is two oranges, some carrots, a couple slices of cold chicken breast and sparkling white grape juice. There is also a white rose on the tray as well.

"Thank you."

"Do you mind if I join you?"

"I would love it if you would." I blush. I put down my trusty pen, a Pilot P-700 Fine tip 0.7, and set the poem aside.

"Jareth sets the food down on my desk and sits down in front of me.

During this time, something was happening on deck. Let's go see what is happening.

"Norrie!"

"Yes?"

"Where is Tomato?"

"I thought she was sitting under the main mast."

"She's not there. Can you help me find her?"

"Of course." Norrington takes damsels hand and helps her look for her missing pet potato.

"Tomato! Where are you?" she calls out. Little did we all know, Tomato grew arms and legs and is exploring the ship. During this time, BJ and Larry TIPB are bugging the crew and Captain Jack is the fetal position murmuring crazy things to himself because he hasn't drunk any rum today. Wow. He flinches at every little noise and shrieks. Finally Tomato sneaks back on deck and sits back down.

"Tomato, there you are!" damsel picks up the spud and hugs her. She then notices the appendages that Tomato grew. "So that's why I couldn't find you. Norrie, look! She grew arms and legs!"

"I see that." He smiles and gives her a hug.

Meanwhile…

"That was delicious. Thanks you Jareth."

"You're welcome. I thought you might have been hungry and needed someone to talk to."

"That Hydra scared me. I haven't had a decent night's sleep since we escaped him."

"Even after we slayed him?"

"Yes. I keep seeing him in my dreams, both alive and dead."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I think that would help."

"What were you frightened of?"

"Dying and all the heads."

"I wouldn't let anything happen to you. You know that, don't you?"

"It's just that staring at something that huge and bent on killing us really…" I break off trying not to be afraid but failing miserably.

"I know. You don't have to be afraid anymore. I'm here. I always will be." He gets up from his chair and wraps his arms around me in a tight embrace. "I was afraid too. I thought I would lose you." He whispers in my ear. "I love you." He steps back and stares intently into my eyes.

"I love you too." I say without breaking his gaze.

Meanwhile…

"Ya see, there's a technique to scaring. Ya have ta follow a person silently. Then when they are occupied, you scream." BJ informs Larry TIPB. "Here, I'll show you." They follow Raghetti around. When Raghetti is talking to Pintel about dresses, BJ attacks.

"Yyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!" he screams as loud as he can. Pintel and Raghetti both scream like small schoolgirls.

"Eeeeeeeeeeek!" They scream. BJ and Larry TIPB are laughing so hard, they had tears running down their faces. Well, Larry TIPB had tears running down his uh, plastic? Yeah, plastic.

"What just happened." Damsel-in-stress says coming out of nowhere followed by Norrington. Captain Jack screams and runs into his Captain's Quarters. Many bolts and locks could be heard. Jareth and I run out of my room to see what all the commotion was about. BJ and Larry TIPB can't answer. We finally figure out what happened when we see how pale Pintel and Raghetti is.

"Well."

"Yeah." damsel replies. "I'm ready to go."

"Now?" Norrington all but cries. They shared a kiss worthy of the cheesiest romance movies. *cough* Earth Girls Are Easy *cough* After they get done, we say our goodbyes to our new friends. Norrington is crying, and Captain Jack had about a bajillion bottles of rum and was working on them. We leave and return to the Underground.

"It's good to be home." Jareth sighs.

"Where have all of you been?!"