A cool breeze blew past Lilly's nose the next morning, causing her eyes to lazily open. She rolled over on her side and saw the window had been cracked slightly to let some fresh air in the room. To her surprise, the room was actually quite warm despite the wood stove not being fixed yet.
Hange and Levi must have gone downstairs already.
She could hear the sounds of dishes and Conny and Sasha's laughter in the kitchen.
Did she wake up last?
Lilly sat up and rubbed at the soreness in her muscles. Sleeping on the floor would do that to you though.
She decided it'd be best to wear pants and a button up shirt today since they'd more than likely be going out to start their experiments with Eren today. This would allow her to put her ODM harness on as soon as she was given the word.
She slowly stretched her arms and legs as she did most mornings, and then went downstairs to join the others.
"There she is. Jeeze Lilly, how long can you sleep for?" Jean asked from the kitchen.
"Is it that late?" Lilly asked as she started to walk into the kitchen.
White sunlight from the morning sun filled the kitchen, giving it a warm comforting feeling. The window was slightly opened in the kitchen as well, and the smell of dew on grass entered the room. She looked around the kitchen and sighed softly. Everyone was eating their breakfast and chatting quietly.
She couldn't help but smile as she watched them all.
This was her family now.
A pretty dysfunctional one, but a family nonetheless.
Jean got up and grabbed a plate off the counter and handed it to Lilly.
"Here. I put this aside for you." Jean said.
"Thank you. That was thoughtful." Lilly gave him a sleepy smile and yawned as she took the plate.
Levi was sitting at the end of the table with Hange with their papers and dishes scattered. Levi's eyes were watching Lilly as she walked across the kitchen.
"You must have been really tired Lilly. It's not like you to sleep so late." Hange said.
"I guess so." Lilly said as she took her seat.
Lilly picked up a bright red berry and popped it into her mouth.
"Sasha, you ate your food already, stop trying to pick off my plate!" Conny said.
"You don't even like raspberries!" Sasha groaned.
"Well I still need to eat what I have!" Conny said.
Lilly smiled to herself and shook her head as she listened to the couple bicker.
"You're well rested I assume?" Levi asked quietly from beside her.
"Oh, yes." Lilly answered.
"Here! This is where we will commence the experiments." Hange pointed to the map firmly.
Levi returned his attention back on the map and gazed down where Hange was pointing.
"Are you sure?" He asked.
"Positive." Hange smiled confidently.
...
Later that day...
"Eren!" Mikasa screamed as Eren's titan form collapsed.
Hange had been putting Eren through many tests all morning. They watched hopefully as he followed Hange's commands. Things like balancing on one foot, to building a small house, to writing in the dirt. Lilly had been especially surprised at how well Eren could build a house in this form. He could probably easily build a castle.
But each time Eren transformed, he slowly became less obedient.
He had less control.
It was like he was slowly turning into a real titan with each transformation, gradually losing his humanity. Lilly watched carefully with her hands on her blades from the top of the rock formation, her brows furrowed and eyes narrowed with concentration.
She had to be prepared for things to go wrong.
They were trained to always think that way so they'd always be ready for the worst.
And Eren was finally at his limit.
If they got too close now, would he lash out?
"What's wrong Eren?! Finished already?!" Hange shouted from the cliff that they stood on. They looked down on Eren's steaming body.
Eren's titan form continued to be motionless.
"Get up! Humanity's future is riding on you!" Hange shouted.
Lilly stood beside Levi as they looked down at Eren. Levi was standing incredibly still, eyes glued to titan form below. But then the steam cleared. And Eren's titan form was actually much shorter than usual, and his legs looked shriveled up and unusable.
Most interesting of all, Eren's actual human body seemed to be sticking out from the nape.
"Stand!" Hange shouted to Eren in a frustrated tone.
"Hey four eyes. Don't you think that Eren looks different this time? He's not even ten meters tall, and he's missing some flesh." Levi began. "Also, His ass is hanging out." He looked to Hange.
"I know that! Eren, do you think you can still move your titan? If so, give us some sort of signal! If you don't, we are digging you out of there!" Hange shouted down at Eren.
Just then Mikasa launched off the side of the formation they were standing on and went down to Eren in a hurry. Lilly's eyes widened. That girl had some guts. Always moving without any given order. She knew this annoyed Levi.
"No, he's not responding! We're done!" Mikasa shouted back at them.
"Hey, that gloomy little brat is ignoring orders again. Should we punish her?" Levi spoke as he looked at Hange.
Hange didn't answer, but jumped down with Mikasa and tried to pull Eren out of his titan form.
Lilly shrugged at him and jumped down too to see if she could be of any help.
"Is he okay?" Lilly asked as she stepped forward.
"Hot! Hot! Eren you're seriously hot right now!" Hange shouted as she was being careful not to burn her hands on the boy's skin.
"Wait, Stop! Eren's bleeding! Let me do it!" Mikasa shouted and tried to hold Eren.
"Wow, this is incredible! He's way more attached than he was earlier! He's fused with the titan's body like they're becoming one! He might just end up turning into a titan if we left him like this! Would it be okay to try it? Or would that make me a bad person?!" Hange asked excitedly.
Hange finally pulled Eren from the titan but his face was horribly disfigured. His flesh appeared to have melted off his face, revealing blood covered parts of his skull and muscle tissue.
It was absolutely disgusting.
Lilly gagged and turned around. The sight made her feel ill. She'd never seen anything like it in her entire life. Levi looked at her expressionlessly before returning his gaze to the awful event happening before them.
"Woahhh Levi! Look! Eren's face is seriously messed up! Hurry, someone get a sketch of this! Is he going to get his old face back?! We'll need it for comparison later!" Hange held Eren from under his arms as Mikasa cut the rest of his body free.
"Experiment complete! Everyone withdraw immediately!" Hange announced.
Lilly pinched the bridge of her nose.
"What did I sign myself up for? Out of all the messed up things I've seen..." She said as they started to get Eren into the wagon.
All Levi did was pat her on the back before putting his hood on.
"Historia, you get in the wagon with Eren." Levi ordered.
"Yes Sir." Historia said obediently.
"Jean, Conny, Mikasa, and Lilly. Search the area and make sure absolutely no one was watching us. Also assure no one follows us back." Levi ordered.
"Yes Sir." Lilly replied as she lifted her hood and hopped up on her horse.
"We really can't do this quietly, can we? That telltale steam rises high in the sky every time he transforms. Even in the mountains." Hange said with a worried expression.
"We need to assume they're watching from somewhere." Levi said.
Lilly rode ahead with the others before dispersing into the woods. She rode quietly, keeping her eyes peeled for anyone who could be following her or hiding around in the trees.
Normally a quiet ride in the woods would have been just the medicine Lilly needed. But now with their current circumstances, it was nothing but frightening. She felt paranoid and on edge. Even when she passed some herbs that would have been useful, she resisted the urge to forage them and kept riding forward. She was riding alone, and if anyone were to jump out in her, they'd more than likely do it while she was dismounted and hunched over, distracted by some plant.
It was terribly clear now that their government was corrupt and hiding something.
And that was terrifying.
Lilly rode on and still hadn't come across any spies. So she cut across the woods and followed behind the wagon from a distance, looking behind her every chance she had.
...
When they arrived home, the first thing they did was lay Eren down on his roll to regenerate again.
Everyone was pretty quiet, after their hopes of Eren being able to harden in titan form was crushed.
Mikasa hadn't left his side even once, and Hange went up every so often to check on his progress. He seemed to be growing his face back well, so that was a relief to Lilly.
She didn't know if her stomach could handle his face being like that any longer. So she remained outside, keeping watch.
She tried to keep her mind busy so she wouldn't overthink the current situation they were all in. Everyone else was doing the same. Hell, even Jean was pacing back in forth in the kitchen. Historia sat on the sofa tapping her boot nervously.
So she decided to try and chop wood for that night. She might as well be productive.
She walked over to the chopping block and placed a short log on it. She lifted the ax off the ground and raised it over her head and began chopping. Her muscles burned as she chopped, but it was a good burn.
And she welcomed the distraction. So she kept going. She kept going long after her body was screaming for her to stop. And then she became lightheaded.
She stumbled back and leaned against the house and closed her eyes.
"I should have assigned you to splitting the wood instead." Levi's voice came from in front of her.
Lilly just gave him a weak smile as she caught her breath.
"You alright?" Levi asked.
"Yeah, just finished burning off my energy is all." Lilly said as she moved her hair from her face.
"That's too bad. I was going to see if you wanted to go on a walk. I'm pissed off." Levi said as he rested his arm against the cabin, his mouth in a tight line. His eyes seemed colder than they normally were.
And that was pretty intimidating.
"Just in the woods?" Lilly asked.
"Yeah. Just in the woods." Levi said his hair hanging over his eye.
Lilly looked up in the sky at the fluffy white clouds and sighed. A nice walk in the woods with him would probably help ease her mind a bit. And hopefully his too. No one wanted to fall victim to a unhappy Captain Levi.
They had already checked the surrounding areas to ensure it was clear anyways so she didn't need to worry much. Why not?
"Alright. Let's go. Eren's still not awake." Lilly said as she pushed herself off the side of the wooden home.
...
Lilly looked up in the trees and saw that the tops were just starting to change color now. Would they be here to see them change completely? She could only imagine how beautiful it'd be out here in the mountains. They walked quietly for awhile next to each other, looking around and taking in the peaceful song of the forest. Twigs snapping under their boots, leaves bristling in the breeze, songbirds in the trees, water flowing over rocks. Every so often, Lilly would brush her hands over the rough bark of the trees as she passed them. Levi watched her as she did this with his hands in his pockets.
He continued to walk beside her for awhile and then he paused and put his hand out to stop her.
"You hear that?" He asked.
Lilly paused and her eyes went wide.
"What? What's wrong? Is someone here?" Lilly whispered and looked around frantically.
Levi looked at her and shook his head.
"No. There's a waterfall nearby." Levi said.
"Oh." Lilly said quietly.
"Well, don't you want to see it?" Levi asked.
Lilly looked at him and nodded. He then started to walk ahead of her, following the sound of the water. They kept walking through the trees and climbed up a little hill until they saw an opening where the waterfall was located. Lilly walked ahead of Levi and stood at the edge of it looking down at the pool of water below.
"This must be where the creek comes to." Lilly said.
"Most likely." Levi said as he stood on the edge of the rocks.
Lilly crouched down and dipped her fingers into the cool water and gazed down into the pool below them once more. The water wasn't nearly as cold as the night before. Today's weather was much more pleasant.
"It's beautiful out here, regardless of the circumstances." Lilly said.
She heard Levi step behind her and she looked up at him. He held out his hand to her and she took it softly in hers and rose to her feet. Lilly looked over to the stream and saw there were stones that she could probably use to cross to the other side. The water was pretty shallow. Maybe only about 6 or 7 inches deep. Many colorful tiny stones were at the bottom, shining through the water.
"Don't even think about it, you'll fall." Levi said.
"What?! No I won't. I'm steady on my feet." Lilly said as she started to walk over to where the first rock was.
She took a small hop and landed on the rock. She looked back and smiled at him. He rolled his eyes with his arms tightly crossed.
He definitely was not in a good mood.
She took another hop and landed on the next one.
"See? I am pure grace!" Lilly grinned widely.
"Yeah, you sure are." Levi said as he watched her hop to the next stone.
She was now in the middle of the stream and was looking for the next rock she could use to cross. She finally spotted one and made a leap for it, but just as she was about to land, a frog jumped onto the rock and croaked at her. She squeaked in surprise, then missed the rock with her foot, causing her to slip and land face first in the water.
She felt the cool water flow around her. She slowly lifted her head and turned around and sat on her butt in the water to look at Levi, who had turned around with his hand appearing to be covering his mouth.
"Are you laughing at me?" Lilly asked.
Levi continued to stand with his back towards her and he shook his head, hand still over his mouth.
"I told- I told you you'd fall." Levi said in between snickers.
"You are laughing at me!" Lilly exclaimed.
Lilly had never actually heard him laugh. And even now, this wasn't really what you'd call a typical laugh. It sounded more like him trying to hold back a muffled noise in his throat.
But she'd take it.
Levi turned around and looked at her with a slight hint of amusement in his eyes, but other than that, there was only a small curve in the corners of his mouth.
"Are you going to help me up or not?" Lilly asked while feeling the smooth gravel under her hands, the water splashing up at her elbows.
Levi shook his head and huffed. He started walking towards the first stone she used to cross the stream. He jumped from that one over to her previous one, skipping a few of the ones she had used. She rolled her eyes and glared at him.
"Show off." Lilly said under her breath.
Levi ignored her as he stood beside her on the stone and reached his hand down for her. But she went over his hand and grabbed his forearm firmly and pulled as hard as she could, pulling him into the stream with her. She heard him start to curse as he sat up, soaked and glaring at her. She glanced at him and started laughing at the sight of his hair clinging to his face and his eyebrows knitted together in an angry fashion.
She kept laughing and pointing at him as the stream flowed over their laps.
He then leaned over quickly and grabbed her by her face. She stopped laughing but she smiled as she looked into his angry eyes. He was still frowning and his eyebrows still furrowed. Water droplets were speckled on his fair face.
"What about getting me soaked is so funny to you?" He grabbed her collar and glared at her.
Lilly bit her lip to keep herself from laughing.
"I can't stand you." He said.
"I can't stand you either." Lilly grinned.
Levi paused as he studied her. She watched as his eyes traveled around her face and then rested on her mouth. He took a small sigh before returning his eyes on hers.
"But I don't know if I could ever truly be angry at you with that stupid grin of yours." He said just inches from her face.
Lilly's face softened and her mouth parted as she looked up at him. He was leaning over her now, just glaring at her. Her eyes traveled from the steely blue of his eyes over to his cheekbones and down to his frowning mouth. It was wet from the water of the stream, and without thinking, she reached up for his lips with her fingers just to touch them. He froze under her touch, and then slowly leaned in over her to kiss her open mouth. She kissed him back slowly, supporting herself on her hands that were still behind her. Water flowed around them as they kissed in the stream, and Levi slowly leaned even more onto her. Before she knew it, she was practically on her back, propping herself up with her bent arms.
Levi reached for her button up shirt with his strong fingers and deftly undid the buttons one by one.
"I'm so annoyed." He huffed.
"Because of today?" Lilly asked as Levi began licking the water droplets off her chest, his hand tilting her head back to reveal her throat to him.
"Fucking Eren." Levi said against her skin in a breathy tone.
A small gasp left her lips when his mouth found her nipple and began nipping at it. She felt his hand grope at her thighs.
"How frustrating." Lilly breathed.
The sensation was driving her mad as he teased the inside of her upper thigh and she let out a whimper. He continued to suck at her skin and grab at her thighs in a needy manner.
"Fucking letting us all down." Levi huffed as he undid Lilly's pants and slid them down under the shallow water.
This feeling was new to her, but it felt so good. The clashing sensations of the cool water running over her hot body. She looked up into Levi's lustful eyes and her need was lit like a match.
She grew hungry.
She reached up and started unbuttoning Levi's shirt, then began planting rough kisses on his throat. Levi let out a small groan as he clenched unto her hips.
"So disappointing." Lilly breathed against his neck, her hands tugging at his raven hair.
"What a fucking brat." Levi breathed into her mouth, teeth nipping at her lower lip.
Levi undid his pants in a ravenous manner. His irritation and frustration was blatantly obvious now. He leaned over her once more, cradling her head in his hand to keep it above the water, and positioning himself against her with the other.
"Right here?" Lilly breathed as the cool water flowed through her hair and over her belly.
"It's been too long. I don't care where anymore. I'll take you here in this shitty stream." Levi breathed as he slid into her, causing her to arch her back.
"It's not shitty." Lilly said as she scraped her teeth against his warm neck.
She breathed heavily as he thrusted into her hungrily and relentlessly in the water. He pressed his mouth against her jaw as he moved within her. Water splashed upwards every time he moved, and all Lilly could see looking up was the clouds in the blue sky. Levi became more rough with her, his teeth scraping against her own throat, fingers grasping tightly at her wet skin.
"Levi." She huffed as his thrust sharply drove into her.
He was far too lost in her.
She cried out when another deep thrust filled her.
"I'm sorry." He breathed into ear.
He eased up slightly before grabbing hold of her chin and sliding is tongue into her mouth. Their tongues danced together as they tugged at each other's hair, trying desperately to get closer.
And she drank up his frustration.
She devoured his stress.
Her hips lifted involuntarily to let him gain further access to her. She pulled at his incredibly soft hair that was damp with fresh stream water as she started to feel the beginning of her release hit her like a ton of bricks.
She threw her head back and cursed under her breath as her body trembled with pleasure.
Perhaps this was just what they needed after a day like that.
...
Lilly walked back to the cabin with Levi in their soaked clothes and changed quietly before anybody could ask them what happened.
Well, Mikasa had seen them return, but she didn't even bother.
After they were changed, Levi and Lilly started gathering the wood she had split from earlier and stacking it neatly against the cabin. Just then, she heard the window upstairs open above her head.
"Eren is awake!" Conny shouted from the window.
Lilly and Levi looked at each other for a moment.
"Don't be too hard on him." Lilly said.
Levi didn't answer. He just turned around to enter the house, and she followed him closely behind, hoping he'd keep his cool inside.
When they entered the room, Eren was sitting up in his bedroll with Hange wasting no time to go over what had happened during the experiments. Lilly and Levi sat next to Eren with Mikasa and Armin to listen in. Jean and Historia came up the stairs shortly after.
"That time, your titan was less than ten meters tall. It was so incomplete that you couldn't stand on your own. It was even more fused to your body, and tearing you out was a lot of work." Hange said as she reviewed her notes.
"...so at the very least...this means we won't be able to start immediately on the operation to retake Wall Maria. All because I couldn't harden my titan body." Eren said in a sullen tone.
He looked extremely upset with himself, and she almost felt bad for him.
At least he tried...
"That's exactly right." Levi spoke.
Lilly shot her eyes to Levi and opened her mouth to speak. She put her hand on his arm but he paid her no attention.
"It was a real disappointment to us. And everyone's been miserable today because of it. We can't let anymore time go to waste. What's next? Titans might rise up out of the ground. Maybe they'll come raining down out of the sky..." Levi said with a irritated look on his face.
Lilly shut her mouth. She knew it was in her best interest to not intervene when Levi was like this.
"And humanity's still a pack of toothless prey animals. In any case, we are in a shitty situation." Levi continued.
Lilly looked at Eren who was frowning deeply. His green eyes met with hers and she tried to apologize with her expression.
She didn't dare speak.
"Eren tried his best. He did everything he could." Mikasa glared at Levi.
"I know that. But so what? Why does it matter that he tried his best? Right now we can't close that hole." Levi snapped.
"But blaming Eren for that-" Mikasa started as she stood up to look down on Levi.
Lilly quickly whipped her eyes over to a Mikasa and stiffened her body.
"Hold on, I'm just being an asshole. I'm not blaming him. Going over our shortcomings and bitching is an important ritual." Levi said as he put his hand up.
Lilly pressed her face into her hand and sighed.
"Take a whiff. Inside these walls, the air's always stunk like trash. It's been that way for over a hundred years. We've always lived in shit. That's our situation. I didn't notice it till just a few years ago. After all, I've sucked in this stink since the day I was born. I saw it as normal. But the air I breathed outside the walls was different. Yes, life out there is hell... but it's got something the walls don't...freedom. Out there, I finally saw what I've been missing." Levi said.
By then, the whole room was staring at him in shock.
"In other words, what Levi is trying to say is that we learned that you can't harden your titan body, and that's a success. That's not all either! We also learned how long you can stay a titan after multiple transformations, and we also got a rough idea of your versatility and limitations. Everything you gave us during this experiment gave us useful information. We will probably have to pay the price for letting of this steam signals in the sky, but now our job is to make the most of those results." Hang said in a cheerful tone, looking back at Levi.
"In other words, let's keep fighting. Is that what you meant, Levi?" Hange asked.
"Yeah... thanks for that." He answered.
...
That night Lilly had helped prepare dinner again.
No one really had the energy to put something more elaborate together.
But everyone was happy about the newly fixed wood stove.
Everyone gathered in the living area to talk amongst themselves while Levi and Hange talked in the kitchen at the table.
Lilly had taken her seat next to Eren on the couch and listened as everyone talked about how much they missed their homes, and what they feared now that things had turned up this way.
But Lilly couldn't keep her eyes open, even though she could have used a nice vent session herself. The next thing she knew, she was drifting off to sleep while sitting up.
Later on, Lilly was awakened by a sudden shake on her shoulder. She opened her eyes and saw she had fallen asleep on Eren. She looked up at him and saw he'd fallen asleep too, along with everyone else on the couches. She looked the other way and saw Levi staring down at her in the darkness.
"Do you want to come upstairs to sleep, or do you want to continue sleeping on Jaeger?" Levi asked quietly.
"I don't know, Eren's pretty comfortable." Lilly said quietly with a smirk.
"Tch." Levi took his hand off her shoulder and started to walk up the stairs.
Lilly slowly got up and crept up the stairs after Levi. Hange was already in her bedroll with her glasses taken off beside her. Levi was just opening his roll and adjusting his pillow.
Lilly crawled into the bedroll as he held it open, and looked up at him and sighed. He crawled in behind her and lowered his head so his lips were just outside her ear.
"What?" He asked.
Lilly turned to look at him and reached up for his face.
"I feel embarrassed to say this, but I'm... nervous. About all of this... Do you think they saw the steam in the sky? What will they do if they catch us?" Lilly asked.
Levi stared at her, his eyes piercing into her's even in the darkness of the room.
"We are doing everything we can to make sure no one finds us." Levi said.
Lilly breathed out slowly and looked to the side. He intertwined his hand with hers before pulling her against him with the other. Lilly buried her face in his neck and closed her eyes.
She truly hoped he was right.
She truly hoped no one would find them.
She signed up to potentially die in the foreign belly of a titan.
Not at the familiar hands of a man.