Chapter 38: What's Real

I Do Not Own Bones

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"Dammit!", Fists pounded the steering wheel.

"Something wrong?", The question was rhetorical. The engines clunky shifting had become more and more pronounced with each mile. The check engine light was flashing ominously on the dash.

"Shut up, I've gotta think...", Jason snapped, looking ahead for a place to stop. Finding it in the parking lot of a defunct discount store.

"Keep quiet...", The command was issued...with the jab of a finger. Their eyes locked briefly. The silent threat relayed.

"Yes sir.", Dark eyes followed Jasons exit, the vehicle door slamming shut in his wake.

Days ago Jason pulled him from the darkness. Back into a world that inundated his fragile, raw senses with blinding light, sounds too loud and surfaces harsh to the touch. Confused and so weak..from dehydration.. injury... Jason had to help him every step of the way. Simple tasks were obstacles. The shower had been a roaring spray of needles pricking his skin. Harder still was the constant doubt. He didn't trust his eyes. Booth had seemed real too.

"Get your hands off me!", " You're not real!.."

Arguing, flailing... wrestled into clothes that scratched like sandpaper. Cajoled to drink.. "...drink more.."..."here take another sip"..." Eat this." Resisting the "illusion" tempting him with the nourishment he desperately wanted...needed. But he knew it was just a trick of the mind...wasn't it?

Despite hysterical episodes of kicking and screaming, Jason had remained... calmly waiting for his grasp on reality to return. Later, after his eyes had adjusted... the lights, all of them had to remain on. ...it kept the nothing away....

Jason...Dad was there. ...He didn't let me die... When his eyes closed in exhaustion...when they were ripped open by nightmares... Dad was still there. After a day or two his mind, for the most part, concluded this world was concrete, Jason wasn't just another hallucination. He was no longer trapped in a pitch black prison. The voice was wrong.

...Keep telling yourself that Lance...

With a slightly better grasp on sanity, he reviewed the events leading up to this moment. Breaking the deal had been a mistake...a lack of judgment with horrible consequences...for himself...for others.

"You see what happened? I warned you. You understand now..", Jason lectured sternly from his bedside post

"I know...I know it won't happen again. I promise.", He meant it. No more trying to escape...He was done...with everything. "I can't... go through that again."

...you still are stupid!... The voice, a constant scream in the beginning, now an occasional murmur, hissed . He ignored it.

Jason patted his arm as he stood, "That makes two of us...at least."

Jason started for the hall.

...bet Daddys illusion doesn't come back ... you'll be dead soon! Hahaha...

Lance suddenly grabbed the mans arm, stopping him in his tracks..

"Don't! No, no please don't leave! ", Fear of being left alone...again...crashed down on him.

Jason returned to his perch, "I guess it can wait."

If the older man was aggravated it didn't show. His tone remained even. Hazel eyes softened with concern. Lance could almost believe it was the Jason he knew before. The one who was a terrible cook, loved football, loved talking...loved him. The Jason his treachery drove away

"You're not the first guy I've seen come outta solitaire a little jittery." ,A smirk lifted the corner of his mouth. "Just listen to your Ol' Man from now on and you'll get through our lil' family vacation just fine.", The smirk fell away along with any doubt Lance had about the identity of his savior.

"We can take a couple more of hours, but we need to hit the road soon...got it?"

Embarrassed by his own wretched neediness, his gaze fell to the light grey fabric of his shirt as he nodded.

A few hours later, Lance did his best to get comfortable in passengers seat. No small feat as the welts running the length of his backside were still sore as Hell. Other than a passing glance in the mirror, he had yet to survey the damage his actions had wrought, but he could feel it. Especially now with Jason wrangling the R.V. out of its overgrown hiding spot. Limbs and brambles scraped the behemoths skin while the whole thing rocked on tires that bumped over uneven terrain hidden beneath a mat of vegetation. Pressed further into the seat Lance groaned when the R.V. jerked to an abrupt stop. The heavy vehicle had scrubbed into something with a clunk. Slowly the vehicle pulled forward, Jason adjusted course then resumed backing up. When the noise did not repeat itself, he continued on assuming whatever it was, had been cleared. Leaving the Rawlings place and Rodgers Corolla behind they hit the open road. Somewhere around the tenth hour of traveling to parts unknown the "bus" began groaning like an old man with the flu. Shuddering with each shift into gear, it struggled to drag itself up the road ahead. Jason was forced to stop.

Lance impatiently waited for Jason to return. He twisted in the leather seat, peering beyond the steering wheel through the heavily tinted glass. It was nighttime and they had parked beneath one of the few functioning lights dimly illuminating a desolate parking lot. Unable to see more than a few yards before an impenetrable darkness took over. Lance quickly turned back. Too late, he could feel it beginning, a quivering sensation rising from the depths.

...Look around...see.. you're still there...all by yourself...

Anxiously he watched the door. Fixing his sights on the latch. Straining to hear anything other than the electric hum of the well lit interior, his own breathing or the voice. ...Why is it taking him so long?...

...because he isn't real dumbass!...

Restless fingers began nervous tapping on the armrest. Were he not restrained, "an understandable precaution" Jason had called it while buckling the straps, Lance would have leaped from his seat to bang on the door, shouted for Jason to come back. Of course he couldn't do that, so he waited and waited.

Glancing over his shoulder through the windshield again, hoping for a glimpse of Jason outside, he saw nothing but the shadowy night surrounding him...it seemed to have pushed in closer than before...surrounding him...threatening to swallow him.

...He's not coming back!...He's gone and you know it... Tsk!Tsk! ...He's gonna be long gone...that battery's gonna die, then it's lights out!... The murmur, now a shout fueled his fears. Pulling and pushing, he struggled frantically to loosen the restraints. ...I've gotta get out...

...Why? It's not like you can leave?...

"Shut up!"

Grunting as the wide straps cut into his chest. Panting to catch his breath, he gave up just as the door opened and Jason bounded inside. Phone to ear, mind on his conversation, oblivious to his captives sweaty, flushed appearance or wide-eyed glare.

"...you sure you can handle it? Alright then...Hey man, I knew I could count on you. See you in a while brother." Jason ended the call, chuckling to himself. " Just going to take a small detour and..."

"What the hell took you so long!", A bead of sweat trickled past panic-stricken eyes.

Dumbfounded by the outburst at first, Jason, quickly recovered. " What the hell? Settle down! It took a while to find the problem. What did ya think? " , His hazel eyes locked on his sons then lit with realization.

A fresh wave of heat blushed Lances features. The whisper of a young boys voice soothed "..see..he always comes back." only to be drowned out by a shriek. "LIAR! He's lying!.."

"Nev..never mind. Umm who...who were you talking to? ", Lance stammered trying to concentrate on the "real" conversation.

Jason eyed his son with concern for a moment then shrugged, "Old buddy of mine. He's going to help us out with "home sweet home" here. You sure you're okay?"

No, he definitely was not okay. His reason was working overtime trying to keep the heckler at bay. ..."Dude, the signs are all around. That's no dark parking lot out there...that's the endless black nothing your drowning in. Jason didn't leave, because he never came back. Jesus Christ man! He's not real...none of it is. You're still lying and dying on the floor Lance...hehehe, that's why you can't get up! Ha ha ha"... Hollow shrieks of laughter echoed in his mind until a muttered litany of "shut ups" forced it to fade back into the recesses.

"What's that? You're mumbling..."

"I'm fine! I'll be fine.", Lance reassured. ...He's wrong this is reality. I am free...Dad is here...

"Uh.. huh...", Jason seemed less then convinced by the young mans assurances, "..well then let's see if we can get this baby to limp a little further down the road.", Jason gave his shoulder a hearty pat on the way to the drivers seat.

That clap on the shoulder, with its tangible warmth, pressure and even the painful ache it produced further eased any doubts. Comforted by the thought he was indeed "okay" Lance relaxed in the plush seat. The ailing behemoth crawled along the asphalt into the night.

"We should be there in a couple of hours.", Receiving no reply, Jason checked his passenger whose hanging head rocked gently with the movements. Shaking his head, he tapped an icon on his phone. Music filled the the silence.

"Hhhmmm...hhhmmm...When I was young..I was the nicest guy...hhhmm hmm. Hmm hmm hmm...I turned around, I read the writing on the wall...I ain't no nice guy after all..hhmm hhmmm..."

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So was it too confusing? Poor Lance seems to be losing it a bit.

jsmartin02 Thank You for the review!

The last line is a reference to a Motorhead song "I Ain't No Nice Guy" any credit goes to them.