Summary: Janet summons a ghost, and it traps her, Bonnie, and Perry in a haunted house. Meanwhile, Heinz recalls the time he turned into a were-cow.
I thought about turning this into a Scooby-Doo type thing, but then I had a better *cough* weirder *cough* idea.
Side effects of reading this include a loss of IQ points and a sudden fear of the elderly.
That's the Spirit 2: The Second Spirit (Part Two)
*Haunted House*
Perry banged his flashlight on the ground a few times, and it flickered back on. Suddenly, he felt something hit his back, knocking him over. He shined his flashlight at what was now laying in front of him. His flashlight was met with another, and with an unexpected relief, he realized that it was Janet who had tripped over him.
She was surprisingly glad to see her nemesis. "Agent P. Thanks heavens." They both stood up. "Tell me you've found Bonnie."
Worry filled the agent's chest. "You mean, she's not with you?"
A terror-filled scream came out of nowhere. "Bonnie!" Janet shouted in fear.
Perry grabbed her hand and ran in the direction of the scream. "Come on!"
*Doofenshmirtz Building*
Ferb rang the doorbell. Heinz opened the door and smiled when he saw who it was. "Oh, hello fellas. Happy Halloween."
"You two, Dr. D," Phineas said.
"I'm a little surprised to see you this cheery on Hallow's Eve," Ferb commented. "What with the whole were-cow incident-"
Heinz frowned in confusion. "Hang on. How do you guys know about that?"
"Perry told us," Phineas answered.
Heinz grinned. "Oh, this is perfect! I was just telling my wife about that, but I can't remember how I changed back. 'Cause, you know, I was a were-cow at the time. Come in, come in." The boys happily walked in, and Heinz called, "Hey, Brooke, look who's here! And, look who's dressed as me! I am flattered, Ferb. I really am."
"Actually, I-" Ferb started.
Brooke interrupted him. "So, how did that whole were-cow thing end, anyway?"
The boys and Heinz sat down on the couch, and Phineas told them the story. "Well, it all started when Dr. D declared war on grass-"
"I already know about that part."
"Okay. I'll skip to a week later. Now, Dr. D was in were-cow form, and Perry was exhausted from chasing him."
*Flashback*
"MOOOOOOO!"
Were-Doof ran down the street and skipped over a cart of watermelons, smashing them, much to its owner's dismay. "My watermelons!" he shouted.
Perry ran past the cart and leaned on a lamp post to catch his breath. He had been chasing the were-cow for hours. Lightning appeared out of nowhere, as did an elderly woman. Perry flinched at her sudden arrival. The woman was heavy-set and had dark green eyes, long straight gray hair, a large round nose, and a dark red robe.
"I have seen you chasing the were-cow for some time now," the woman said. Perry blinked and hesitantly nodded. "Yes. My name is...Mirwelda!" Lightning crashed. "I know many things about the paranormal world. You wish to change the were-cow back to human form, yes?" Perry blinked twice. How did she know? "Yes. I know many things. For instance, I know that you are...OWCA Agent Perry the Platypus!" Lightning crashed. "My grandson, the Regurgitator, told me about you. He also taught how to make lightning appear on command." (Oh, There You Are, Perry)
The Regurgitator's grandmother, huh? Perry thought. I guess crazy runs in the family.
She scowled. "I am going to ignore that."
Ignore what?
"I can read your thoughts, you know." She pointed up. "They are just above this line."
Perry had no response.
Mirwelda pressed her fingers together. "There is only one way to permanently return a were-cow to his human form. He must be bitten by..."
*End of Flashback*
"So, what was it?" Heinz asked. "No, no, wait! Let me guess. It was...a goozim! No, the giant floating baby head! The giant floating rest of the baby? (Terrifying Tri-State Trilogy of Terror) No, that doesn't have a mouth. A-at least, I assume it doesn't. Oh, I give up. What was it?"
Phineas turned to his brother, who was now holding a guitar. "Ferb?" Ferb began playing his instrument.
(This song is kind of a parody of a Halloween song that I think you'll all be familiar with. Ferb sings like the guy in the song does.)
-Ferb-
You won't believe what the creature was.
You won't believe your ears, because
The beast was thought to be fake, indeed.
But, I'm telling you, it is real, you see.
It was a one-eyed, one-horned flyin' purple people eater.
-Phineas-
One-eyed, one-horned flyin' purple people eater.
-Ferb-
One-eyed, one-horned flyin' purple people eater.
Sure sounds weird to me.
Brooke put her hand up in a 'stop' motion, completely confused. "Forgive me for interrupting, but...a flying purple people eater?"
Heinz put his hand over the one Brooke had on her lap. He smiled. "No, honey. He said, 'one-eyed, one-horned flying purple people eater."
"Jim, to his friends," Ferb added.
*Haunted House*
Janet opened a door and she and Perry found Bonnie in a feetle position in the corner of the room. They ran over to her. Janet knelt down and hugged her. "It's okay, sis. It's okay."
"What happened?" Perry asked, despite fearing the answer.
A female voice came from nowhere and called out creepily, "Get...out..."
Janet and Bonnie shivered and huddled closer together, but Perry wondered, "Why does that voice sound so familiar?"
*Doofenshmirtz Building*
"Anyway," Phineas began, "Mirwelda took Perry out to the woods to summon Jim, the one-eyed, one-horned flying purple people eater. You see, there was a certain incantation needed to summon him."
*Flashback*
Deep in the woods, Perry stood behind Mirwelda, as she recited a rather strange incantation. (This incantation is from the Courage, the Cowardly Dog episode, "Demon in the Mattress.") Thunder crackled softly in the background, and Perry wasn't shivering because of the sudden wind. "Hullaballoo and howdy doo. Musty prawns and Timbuktu. Yeltzy bye and hippity hoo. Kick 'em in the dish pan, hoo hoo hoo!" Lightning crashed.
A deep roar came from the distance, and Perry swallowed a lump of fear. The monster flew down from the sky-
It was shorter than Perry and was actually kind of cute. The platypus immediately felt embarrassed for ever being afraid of it. As the name implied, 'Jim' had one black eye and one white horn. He had black, bat-like wings and stood on four furry, elephant-like feet that had yellowish claws. Surprisingly, his fur was light blue.
Mirwelda chuckled at Perry's reaction. "You were expecting something large and purple?" Perry blinked and nodded. Jim flew up and perched himself on Mirwelda's shoulder. "Many think this. Jim is a rather small creature, as you can clearly see. As for the color, he is not a purple people eater. He is a purple people eater." Perry blinked. "He eats purple people. Although, his diet generally consists of vegetation and the occasional fish."
"MOOOOO!" Were-Doof shouted just outside the woods.
Jim let out an uncharacteristically deep roar, showcasing his sharp yellow teeth, and flew after him. Mirwelda and Perry followed. They found Were-Doof trying to attack Jim with a tree branch. Jim flew up and bit Were-Doof on the shoulder. The were-cow cried out in pain. Jim jumped off, as Were-Doof became engulfed in a blinding white light and morphed back into a human. More specifically, an unconscious one.
*End of Flashback*
Phineas finished the story. "So, Perry took Dr. D back home, and Mirwelda and Jim went...where ever they went."
Brooke just stared in disbelief, but Heinz nodded and said, "That makes sense."
Brooke asked incredulously, "What part of that made sense?"
*Haunted House*
"I tell ya, I've heard that voice before," Perry stated.
Bonnie gulped. "M-maybe you knew the ghost from somewhere before she p-p-passed on..."
The 'ghost' called out, "This incantation will force on to you a monster that will force you to leave this place!" The girls squeezed their eyes shut, not wanting a monster to be the last thing they see. "Hullaballoo and howdy doo! Musty prawns and Timbuktu-"
Something clicked in Perry. "Mirwelda?"
There was a pause before the 'ghost' called out, "Perry the Platypus?" Mirwelda stepped into the room. "Why are you trespassing in my home? Is there another were-cow problem?"
Janet and Bonnie exchanged confused looks. Perry just stared at the elderly woman. "Uh, n-no. No, there isn't. Wait-wait a minute, you live here?"
Mirwelda nodded. "Yes, and I do not like trespassers."
Perry waved his arms in frustration. "You did all this? Just to get us to leave?"
"I really don't like trespassers."
"What is going on?" Janet asked.
Perry sighed. "Nothing paranormal, I can tell you that much. Let's get out of here."
The girls, befuddled as they were, followed him out. Once they reached the outside, Bonnie asked, "So, no ghost?" Janet pulled out her cell phone.
Perry turned around to face her. "No ghost. Whatcha doin', Janet?"
Fear pitted in Janet's stomach. "I-I was just researching that lady, and I found her obituary. It's from 1984!"
Bonnie gulped. "But...but, obituaries are only made when people die."
The three of them looked back at the building. Mirwelda was standing at the door, grinning wickedly. Lightning flashed, and she vanished. Realizing what was happening, Perry, Janet, and Bonnie screamed and ran away.
The End...?
Ignore the question mark. This really is the end. OR, IS IT!? Nah, I'm just kidding. It's over.
Review and happy Halloween!