Chapter 38: Off To War
It was very late into the night and the full moon hung over the land as the howling of wolves,zombies and dogs,one of which being Snoopy rung through the countryside while Galavant and his team rode through the forests on route to Valencia. And by "rode" they were slowly trudging through the fields on their horses and ponies at an incredibly slow pace since the zombies were too stupid toactually use their legs to run,but on the bright side it did allow them to get into some neat discussions.
"Doesn't this breeze feel nice everyone? We've been so caught up in wars,and rescuing princesses that we've forgotten that Winter is upon us." Sid enthusiastically asked as he embraced the nice and cool breeze of the night while Lucy quite frankly disagreed as she folded her arms "It's freezing out here Sid,are you cold blooded or something?"
Richard on the other hand didn't seem to mind the cold as he scoffed and playfully retorted "Hey it's not that bad,I dealt with the blizzard of 1198 when I was a kid. Don't complain about a light breeze if you weren't there for that." to which Heather asked out of shock "You were in the blizzard of 98? I heard it was so bad that entire towns were snowed in."
"Yep,but I sure survived it all right. Richard here has thick skin." Richard smugly replied as he kissed his biceps before Lucy coughed and retorted "Says the guy who cried when he got jelly on his fancy pants." to which the group had a good laugh at Richard's expense while he puckered his lips in frustration.
"Yeah well that's the old Richard. The new Richard is much tougher than that." Woodstock sighed and remarked as he flew on top of Richard's shoulder before Galavant confidently backed him up "Yeah he's got a point,he actually goes to the bathroom by himself now instead of having his servants do everything for him."
Snoopy and the others bursted out into laughter at the seams as Richard gasped in shock and asked "Who told you I used to do that?" to which Galavant merely pointed over to Lucy.
"Dammit Lucy." Richard angrily growled due to Lucy telling Galavant some very private information before the latter heroically remarked "Look at me go,leading an army of half-dead zombie warriors on a quest to save a princess along with some kids. Now that is some solid hero stuff." to which Sid happily agreed "One of your most heroic scenarios sir."
"Legendary." Roberta agreed with Sid and Galavant as well before Richard agreed even further "Totally,though you guys have to admit,when the flesh hits the road,it is feeling just a bit challenging is it not?"
Richard and the others then turned around to face the massive horde of zombies slowly trudging behind them as Charlie Brown chucked and remarked "In all my years of being alive,I never thought I'd be helping to be lead an army of zombie warriors before I win a baseball game." before Thibault mockingly added "Or do anything right or worth noticing."
Charlie Brown rolled his eyes and sighed before Galavant noticed that the zombies were so stupid that they were bumping into trees and falling onto the ground as he tried to redirect them back on the right path "No,guys,guys,guys go around the tree. Go around. I don't know why I bother,I mean they're basically useless aren't they?"
"Yeah,pretty much." Sid couldn't help but agree with Galavant as Lucy sighed and retorted "Yeah,well they're all we got. So we have to make the best of them." to which Sid nodded his head and agreed "Yeah we have to,although I have noticed they are quite drawn to you sir. Maybe it's because you were briefly dead." before he chuckled lightly.
Galavant chuckled as well as he asked his two squires "Oh yes,and why was that Sid? You too Chuck,I think you two remember that reason quite well. Why was I briefly dead?" to which Sid immediately caught on and retorted in guilt "We told you how bad we feel about that. You ever gonna let it go?" before Charlie Brown nervously added "Can we please let bygones be bygones? I feel bad about it enough already,a grudge is certainly not helping."
"Yeah I think you're being a tad too bitter here Gal." Woodstock agreed as he tried to defend Sid and Charlie Brown up before Snoopy added "Let's just let it go already,besides you still came back." to which Galavant continued anyway "Oh you mean like…...when they let go the sword and it flew through the air sticking into my chest,temporarily killing me?"
Charlie Brown got deep shades of red in his face as he put one of their empty potato sacks over his head before Heather whispered to him in an attempt to comfort him "I'm sure he'll get over it eventually." to which the boy smiled underneath his sack and replied "I sure hope so."
"So we'll take that as a no then." Sid groaned to himself with hints of guilt as they all went back to riding towards the castle. Once they were all in good enough walking distance of the castle,Galavant pulled them all over as they got off their horses and Franklin asked out of confusion "Why are we stopping here? Are we close to the castle?" to which Galavant confirmed "Right,we're almost to Valencia,me and Snoopy are gonna scout ahead to that casket to see if it's truly empty."
"Hey,why does the stupid beagle get to go?" Lucy asked out of a clear desire to go with them as Galavant retorted "Because I know he'll listen to me and not go straight for Madalena's throat at the sight of her." to which Lucy angrily folded her arms and Richard remarked in awe "Wow….Valencia,seems just like yesterday I was the worst tyrant this land has ever seen. That was weird."
"I'm gonna miss the days when you were a whiny self imposed fool." Lucy remarked in disappointment that those days were gone as Richard got a stern look on his face and growled "Why I oughta-"
"Yeah,cuckoo bananas,you stay here with Roberta and the kids." Galavant anxiously interrupted Richard's nostalgic rambling as Roberta showed support for the idea "I think that's a great idea. Don't you,guys?" to which they all gave varying responses that basically stated that they were okay with the idea with the exception of Richard who merely stood there in silence for a few moments before he suddenly called out to Galavant "Hey,Galavant,quick story I want to tell you. I need your advice."
Richard frantically walked up to the knight and the dog before he nervously whispered "I really want to kiss Roberta and stuff and I think the timing is right. But did she say she likes me?" to which Galavant retorted in annoyance "Get to the point." before Snoopy added "We kinda don't have much time here Richard."
"Do-do I ask her? Do I just grab her and kiss her? Sneak up behind her in dark clothing,shout "boo" and kiss her while she's screaming? What?" Richard frantically asked in the hopes of finally being able to kiss Roberta as Galavant tried to excuse themselves "Look,we would love to help you but like Snoopy said we've sort of got more important things to do okay? But no,definitely don't do the "boo version". It's sort of frowned upon okay? We've got to go. Snoopy,stay close to me." to which the dog saluted before they headed off to scout the castle,leaving Richard and the others behind as the man reminded himself "No "boo version." Good to know."
As Galavant and Snoopy slowly walked through the forest with the intent of scouting the castle up ahead,their attention would suddenly be diverted to behind them when they heard the zombies groaning and following them as Galavant quietly tried to shoo them off "Look,guys,guys,guys! Stop! You can't go with us,we're sneaking!" before Snoopy added "We don't wanna become like you guys,stay put." to which the zombies did so.
Snoopy and Galavant tried to continue to head to the castle but would be stopped when the zombies started to follow them once again as the latter groaned "No,seriously! Just,we're trying to do a secret castle scout. Just….." before they went back to sneaking around,only for the zombies to follow them yet again as Snoopy exclaimed "Would you guys cut it out?!" to which Galavant gave up and reluctantly obliged to let them come "Oh for the love of god,yeah,yeah,all right,come on."
As Galavant,Snoopy and now the zombies headed off to the castle,it was now just Richard,Roberta,Woodstock and the kids left behind as Freida asked "So,anyone got any games or something?" to which Lucy replied as she pointed to the zombies behind her "I got a game we could play,it's called let's follow them to the castle."
"Lucy you know we can't do that,Galavant said we have to stay behind." Roberta kindly refused to go with Lucy's idea as she groaned out of annoyance and replied "Whatever." before Richard walked back to the group and tried to talk to Roberta "So…..uh,Bobby I meant to ask you…...hey what's your favorite tree? Because kids these days are all into oaks,but I like a spruce and I-"
Richard's lovestruck babbling would be quickly interrupted however when Roberta pulled him over and kissed him smack on the lips as the others gasped at the sight. Lucy was especially impressed by this sudden display as she gasped in awe "Woah! Richy you did it?" before Woodstock started to smile happily and said to himself "You done good Richard,you done good."
Once Roberta finally let go of Richard,the man stood there in complete silence and shock after what had just happened before he remarked in bewilderment "Oh my god,that was wonderful. Lucy,you're in charge." Richard and Roberta then came together for another kiss before they laughed and waltzed off behind a tree,leaving only Sid,Woodstock and the kids as the only adult left remarked "So,we'll just stand her and listen to this happen then I guess." to which Charlie Brown nervously suggested "I think we should head somewhere else for the time being,something tells me we're a little too young to be hearing this."
"Definitely." Lucy and the others agreed as the kids walked off to get away from Richard and Roberta's sudden date and or make out section while Sid merely stood there with the horses with nothing to do.
It didn't take very long for Madalena and her army to make it to Hortensia as they had now set up a war camp near the war battlefield,for the great battle for Hortensia was about to begin. Isabella and the others on the other hand were scared of of their wits,cause thanks to Prince Harry's decision to only have chocolate and stuffed animals in their armory,they literally had no weapons whatsoever,so their only hope was to try and negotiate with the enemies. Isabella,the jester and the kids were slowly walking through the enemy camp as the jester swung a yellow flag,signaling a truce as he nervously called out "Flag of truce! Nothing to worry about! Guaranteed safe passage! Super form to kill us!" to which Sally nervously retorted "We're not safe at all,we're in their war camp!"
"I think it's safe to say this is our last hope." Marcie calmly stated as Peppermint Patty tried to lighten the mood "Hey don't be like that Marcie,once they hear our terms they're bound to call this whole thing off. I hope." to which the jester nervously panicked "Or else they'll use our limbs as sticks for kabobs!"
"Oh will you stop it?" Isabella angrily whispered in the hopes of shutting the jester and his panicking up as she continued "You're making us all look like tools,even the kids are braver than you." to which the jester nervously joked "We are tools,tools that will be used to make the valencian swords dull,with murder! Sorry when I'm nervous,my jokes get kind of weird." before Scheroder retorted "Still better than your older material."
"Patty's right,we'll be fine." Isabella confidently agreed with Patty's statement from before "Sure we can't defeat the valencians with my cousin's toy army,but terms of service are always offered before a battle. Easy-peasy,pudding and pie."
"We're gonna pudding and die." The jester nervously joked once again as they were approaching the royal tent to which the others all yelled "Shut up!'" before the jester tried to apologize "I'll try and pull it together." This was the moment of truth.
Meanwhile Madalena and Gareth were relaxing inside said tent and happily fantasizing and gushing about the war to come tomorrow as Madalena was giving her king a haircut better suited for war despite the fact that he had very little hair to begin with. "This was such a good idea. I think getting out of the castle was great for us,you know?" Madalena asked in a relaxed and soothed voice as Gareth smiled and added "There's nothing like a good old war camp." to which Madalena showed interest "Hmm." before Gareth continued in excitement "Fresh air,sounds of nature,and the promise of getting to kill people. It just really gives a man a lift,you know what I mean?"
"Yeah,it's nice." Madalena happily agreed with Gareth as she patted him on the head "I can't wait till tomorrow so I can make Lucy and Isabella watch all of their friends be horrifically slaughtered,and I'll make sure Scheroder gets it the worst because I know she has a thing for him." before she suddenly noticed Isabella and the kids approaching the tent as she asked in confusion "What"
"Hmm?" Gareth added in confusion as well as he looked up at the queen before she got a horrified look on her face and panicked "Flag of truce? No,no,no,no,no,no,no what are they doing here?" to which Gareth guessed as he got out of his chair and got the shaving cream off his head "They've probably come to discuss terms of surrender."
"I don't want them to surrender,I want to kill them!" Madalena whined in nervousness that she may not get to kill Isabella and the others as they all came waltzing into the tent with serious game faces on before Isabella greeted them "Madalena,Gareth." to which Gareth greeted them back "Princess,and the fool?"
The room was left in complete silence as the king and queen starred at the jester intently before he suddenly blew a loud raspberry,much to everyone's confusion as the jester apologized "Sorry,it's pretty tense in here." before Madalena noticed the angry kids and greeted them "Well,well,well,if it isn't the sweet little tots from before,nice to see y'all haven't changed a bit,kid with the blanket,four eyes,stringy haired dude with the freckles,Violet and Patty the divas,whiny blonde that always complained about everything to her big brother believe me I could hear it in my room,my former Beethoven obsessed musician Scheroder,the wretched poodle and last but not least,L-"
Madalena suddenly stopped her greeting of the kids when she noticed that Lucy was completely missing as her smug smile faded away into a confused glare before she stammered "W-w-w-where the hell is Lucy?" to which Linus angrily retorted "You tell us miss,as far as we know she left the kingdom to look for you in Valencia." before Violet added "Yeah,she got a beef with you lady."
"B-but-but we just…..oh god dammit!" Madalena angrily exclaimed as she angrily punched a nearby pillar "Lucy's all the way in Valencia right after we ditched the damn place! And just when I thought I could off her once and for all!" to which Peppermint Patty smugly retorted "Oh look at this,Madalena here is still continuing her whining after all this time,good to know she hasn't changed a bit either."
"Now you listen here you little brats-" Madalena tried to threaten the kids but was suddenly interrupted by Isabella "I thought we might discuss terms,avoid unnecessary bloodshed." as Madalena calmed down and declined "Well I kind of am here for the unnecessary bloodshed." to which Isabella persisted "The rules of war dictate that-"
"You better follow the rules Madi or prepare to get your teeth knocked out!" Peppermint Patty angrily interrupted Isabella's attempt at an negotiation before Scheroder stated much calmer "We looked over the rule books and they specifically say that-"
"God you all are going to be lame about this aren't you?" Madalena interrupted them and their rambling before she obliged to negotiate as she stated her terms "Fine,here are my terms. Complete surrender. Hand over your castle,your gold,your jewels,your livestock." to which Isabella tried to refute them "I think that's a bit extreme."
"Not done." Madalena replied as she was still not done with her terms "All the men of fighting age will be conscripted into our army. Oh and I want all the children to put their toys in a pile then I'm going to light it in fire. Yay! I'm having fun after all."
"We don't really have any toys." Marcie corrected the queen as she straightened her glasses before Madalena made a loophole "Oh,well the kid with the blanket will hand it over." to which Linus's eyes widened and he held his blanket tightly before Madalena evilly continued "That's right,I saw how attached you were to that wretched thing before,so that's why you're going to hand it over while I make you watch as I burn it myself."
"No way lady! You're insane if you think I'm gonna be okay with this!" Linus determinedly refused to agree to such terms as Isabella and the others stood there in complete silence before the princess stated "If I could have a moment,group meeting everyone." to which they all stepped back and huddled together to discuss the terms.
"These terms are impossible!" Isabella whispered in a nervous panic as Patty frantically added "They're literally gonna rob us of everything. They might as well kill us!" before Linus nervously asked "They're gonna take my blanket away,we can't agree to these terms they're insane."
"What choice do we have?" The jester asked as he was considering to agree with the terms as Sally scoffed and retorted "We do have a choice here,and it's called not agreeing with these terms." before Scheroder added "It's all up to you Isi,it's your call." to which Isabella nervously sighed "You're right jester." and exited the group circle.
"Wait what?" Peppermint Patty asked in confusion as Isabella ignored her and told the queen "Your terms are monstrous but I think-" before being interrupted once again by Madalena "Oh and one last thing…..I want you and the girls to be my new handmaidens. I was gonna kill all of you,but things change."
"What?" Violet asked in anger as one of Madalena's servants came by as he held and opened a small black box to reveal the crown of the queen of Valencia before Madalena put on said crown and smugly stated "Your main duties….will be cleaning my crown." to which Violet sternly refused "If you think me and the others will ever be going back to that castle so we can be your slaves,think again lady!"
"Yes,and that is not your crown. That is the official crown of the queen of Valencia,and my mother is it's rightful owner." Isabella angirly growled at the sight of Madalena wearing her mother's crown as the latter commanded them like animals "Settle down tiny tots. You're the ones who came here to surrender." to which Peppermint Patty yelled as she tried to slug Madalena only for Linus and some of the others to hold her back "What did you just call us?"
"You all heard what I said...tiny tots." Madalena smugly retorted as Isabella finally put her foot down and stated "You're gonna regret calling us tiny tots!" to which the jester exclaimed in excitement while Madalena took off her crown "Yes! Catfight!"
"Finally,I've been waiting two seasons for this!" Gareth added equally as excited as he sat down in a chair to watch as Sally encouragingly yelled "Dim her outlook! Shorten her lifespan! Rearrange her landscape!" before Isabella and Madalena got into a fight.
Madalena: I don't like you.
Isabella: I really don't like you.
Both: I really,really,really,really want you gone. This won't surprise you,but I despise you,you want to see,step to me,cause it's on.
Madalena: I'm thinner,cooler,clearly much crueler and check out the bling I'm your kingdom's new ruler. ("Boom!") Got a jeweler to pimp out your crown.
Isabella: The surf may be up but I'm taking you down. ("Ooh yeah.") Enough pleasantry,you're queen presently,but hon you're just one of the peasantry. Kosher as bacon and fakin the funk.
Madalena: You'll just have to deal.
Isabella: Oh I'll deal with you punk. I'm smarter,tougher,my biceps are buffer,you're clever,whatever,I'm clever enough-er.
Madalena: Except as a kisser,I've heard you're the worst.
Isabella: I still got the guy.
Madalena: But I had him first.
Isabella: Huh,that's not all you've had now is it? The whole feudal system has paid you a visit.
Madalena: Yet it's you who's now royally screwed.
Isabella: You think so ho?
Madalena: I know so prude. Let's see...I've got the sharper weapons,(yeah right),I've got the fiercer horde,(right but-),I've got your booty pinned against the wall.
Isabella: I've got the-(You've got nothing.) I've got the-the hero sword,that's right the one king to unite them all!
"You don't have the bearer of the one true-"
"Oh I most certainly do,don't I everyone?"
"Uh,yeah. Word up." The jester nervously lied despite Isabella not having the hero sword as the others slowly and nervously nodded their heads in confusion.
Madalena: I don't like you.
Isabella: I really don't like you.
Both: You really,really,really crossed the line,and soon your castle and your ass'll be mine,I don't like you!
"We will see you on the battlefield!" Isabella angrily stated before she stormed out of the tent,with the jester and the others following shortly afterwards.
"Ugh,this just keeps getting worse and worse!" Linus exclaimed in a total panic as they walked back to the castle before the jester agreed "You said it,you challenged this giant army to a fight,and you told them you have the bearer of the the sword of the one true king,which I might add we don't. No one knows who it is!" to which Sally angrily remarked "Way to go Isi,we could have stopped the war then and there if you didn't blow up at them."
"Don't get your bells in a bunch,I lost my temper. You all heard Madalena's terms. We have to fight,and we will win." Isabella frustratedly tried to defend herself as Peppermint Patty retorted in determination "No matter what happens,I am not gonna become her crown cleaning slave,never!" to which the jester nervously asked "How exactly? Our army has no weapons."
"We'll improvise." Isabella confidently replied "We still have Linus's blanket,Marcie's potions,and Fifi's combat training. Tell the people to gather anything we can use as weapons. And we will make our stand." to which the others replied in unison "Right!" before the jester agreed as well "All right,I just wish you hadn't riled up Madalena. She seemed really pissed."
Speaking of which,Madalena was having an absolutely panic and anger attack back in her tent as she was terrified to think that Isabella and the others could have the one true king on their side as Gareth tried to calm her down "Queenie,relax. Everything's fine." to which Madalena sarcastically smiled and retorted "Relax? If the one true king is really on their side that's bad news. The prophecy says he who pulls the sword from the stump will unite the kingdoms under his glorious rule. The prophecy's never wrong,that's just science."
Gareth on the other hand didn't believe in such a myth as he confidently tried to make her feel better "Look I trained this army,and they're more than capable of handling some stupid king with some fancy sword." before he comfortingly held her hand and continued "Don't worry." to which the voice of Wormwood suddenly and surprisingly disagreed "Oh you should worry."
Madelena and Gareth turned to the left to see Wormwood and Barry standing in the corner as he continued "But luckily we have a secret weapon on our side and that secret weapon is….." before he kissed his hand and concluded "Moi." It seemed that Wormwood had even further of a dark side than he let on as Madelena asked out of confusion "What?" and Gareth added "Prat." before Wormwood continued "Not only am I the most respected wedding planner in the land,I'm also a practitioner of the dark arts,a master of the D'Dew."
Madalena and Gareth were both intrigued and slightly confused at such a technique as the former asked out of curiosity "What's that?" before Barry clarified "Dark,Dark,Evil Way. The D'Dew." to which Wormwood sternly commanded "Shut up Barry. But what he said is right."
"Why do you call it the D'Dew? Wouldn't it be simpler to just to say "The Dew?" Gareth asked when he noticed how simpler it would have been to just call it the dew as Madalena agreed "Good point." to which Wormwood frankly disagreed "No the way isn't just dark. It's dark,dark." before he turned around to the snack table and picked up two flaming chalices and explained the D'Dew "D'Dew…...is the most powerful force to ever exist. With it you can control events,bend them to your will,and turn everything to your favor." before he suddenly continued more upbeat and cheerful "It's also helped me with my stubborn tummy fat."
"So all we have to do is eat this,and we have magic?" Madalena asked out of pure determination as she was fully down with using this mysterious magic. Wormwood however stood there in complete silence for a few moments before he corrected her "No,no,oh sorry. Yeah,I see where the confusion lies. This is Cherries Jubilee,something I was thinking about for your potential wedding,hmm? Imagine a darkened hall,hmm? Hundreds of these coming in at once. Oh wow!"
"I'm in." Madalena suddenly agreed to go with the idea in a determined tone of voice as Wormwood stopped his rambling and replied "Yeah…..oh good,Barry,order the bowls." before Barry started to leave the tent,but it turned out that Madalena was actually talking about the D'Dew as she corrected him "I meant with D'Dew." to which Barry stopped and Wormwood started to develop an evil smile.
However Gareth didn't seem too keen on using this dark magic as he tried to intervene "Hold on a minute. I said I can handle this." before Madalena anxiously whispered "Come on Gareth,let's do D'Dew." to which Gareth kindly asked "Can I have a word with you for a minute?"
"What? Why?" Madalena asked in a whiny voice as Gareth pulled her over into a corner before he tried to dissuade her from using the D'Dew "Look,we've got a good thing going. Do you want to bring dark magic into this?" to which Madalena smiled and insisted that they go along with Wormwood's idea "I don't know,a little D'Dew might be exiting. Spice things up." before she chuckled and Gareth sighed deeply out of disappointment.
Madalena knew that Gareth wasn't in love with the idea as her smile slowly faded away into a frown and she asked the man "This really bugs doesn't it?" before Gareth meekly replied "Yes."
"Are you sure you can win the battle without it?" Madalena asked for absolute certainty that Gareth would win the battle without the use of dark magic as he assured her "Positive." to which Madalena reluctantly decided to do the right thing for him. Her frown slowly reformed back into a loving smile as she placed her hands on his chest armor and obliged "Okay,for you." before she kissed him on the cheek and told Wormwood "Sorry Mr Wormwood. No D'Dew."
Gareth then left the tent in satisfaction and relief that Madalena didn't resort to using the D'Dew,unaware that she wouldn't hold up her end of the promise. When it was just her and Wormwood left in the tent,she slowly walked over to the man and happily sighed before she calmly and quietly told him "I'll find you later." before she continued much more excited "D'Dew!" Once she finally left the tent and went to rejoin Gareth,all that were left were a few guards and Wormwood with a psychotic and excited smile,everything was going according to his plan.
The next morning Galavant and the others had finally made it to the castle of Valencia,for after he and Snoopy scouted the castle they came to the conclusion that it was abandoned for some unknown reason and decided to have everyone come with them. As they all slowly walked into the now empty courtyard,Charlie Brown nervously gulped and remarked out of irony "I never once for a second thought that I'd be back here,last time I was here me and Sid were being chased by guards." to which Pig-Pen asked out of curiosity "That reminds me,how did you two get out of the castle? Didn't you say you and Sid were servants?"
"Let's just say that Madalena heard some of our more degrading comments about her." Charlie Brown replied as Lucy surprisingly complimented the boy "Nice going there you two,they must have been so bad that they got y'all thrown out." to which Heather suddenly joined the conversation "You know before Richard took this place over,that's where my family was considering moving. Glad we didn't do that."
"Yeah,or else you would have been taken in along with Violet and Patty since they also lived here when it happened." Franklin stated in relief before Woodstock decided to bring up the odd lack of people in the castle "You know this place seems to be deserted,it's actually kind of unsettling to be honest." to which Sid couldn't help but agree "Yeah,are you sure they're gone sir?"
"Well it looked empty from the tip of the hill." Galavant replied in certainty that they were all gone as Snoopy nodded his head in agreement. Lucy however scoffed and rolled her eyes as she tried to debunk their claim "It's not abandoned you guys,it's just cause they probably set up an ambush around here somewhere,so we gotta be careful." before Sid suddenly perked up when he noticed a note plastered on the door to the throne room "There's a note."
"A note? Who leaves a note on the front door of their castle?" Snoopy asked out of confusion as Sid took off the note and read it "Off to invade Hortensia,back in a jiffy." to which the rest of the kids gasped before Lucy asked in anger "What?"
"Yeah looks like we definitely have the place to ourselves." Sid continued in relief that no one was there before Galavant took a look at the note. Lucy on the other hand was massively disappointed that Madalena and the rest of the castle workers were gone as she groaned in disappointment "Oh man,I wanted to kick her to the curve so bad but now she's all the way in Hortensia."
It was then and there that Charlie Brown realized something terrible as his eyes widened in shock and fear before he nervously whimpered "Oh….oh no guys. If Madalena is in Hortensia,then that means Linus and the others could be in trouble!" The others on the other hand kept silent for the most part as the severity of the situation started to hammer itself into their heads as Snoopy replied in nervousness "Oh man,I hope they're doing alright over there." to which Woodstock asked "Do you think they can handle themselves over there?" before Galavant heroically tried to cheer them up "Don't worry everyone,we're gonna head over there soon and help them out. I promise. We just gotta rest up and we'll head out either at sunset or tomorrow morning. For now let's try and scavenge around for supplies."
Charlie Brown and the others smiled and slowly nodded their heads as Galavant's reassurance helped cheer them up a little,but before they could even start to look around the castle for supplies their attention would be suddenly directed over to Richard and Roberta. It was obvious that they must have had a great night out together because all they did was giggle to each other uncontrollably as Galavant asked out of confusion "Do you guys know what's going on with them?" to which Sid tried to brush it aside since he was forced to listen to them make out all night "Don't ask." before Freida added "We don't know because we didn't feel like snooping around."
However Richard seemed to have overheard Galavant and the other's remarks as he suddenly perked up and cheerfully asked "What's that? You all want to hear how we spent our evening?" before Galavant,Sid and especially the kids tried to politely decline,only for the two of them to ignore them and tell them anyway as Lucy groaned "3 more chapters and no more songs,3 more chapters and no more songs."
Richard: We went to the lake.
Roberta: Things got kinda snuggly.
Richard: She led me behind a tree.
Roberta: He began to shake.
Richard: It was pretty ugly.
Roberta: I had given up basically.
Both: Then finally,things began to happen. Finally,things involving tongue. Finally,and the night was still kind of young.
Richard: Do you wanna know more?
Zombies: Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Roberta: Can I tell you the rest?
Zombies: Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Both: You're not gonna believe it.
Zombies: Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Both: But you've probably guessed.
"So how many songs did you guys go through on your journey? Was it more than ours?" Charlie Brown asked Snoopy and Woodstock out of curiosity to which the latter replied "About as much as before." before the former added "And there's still 3 chapters left of this story so that doesn't count the ones in those."
"This is how tiring these songs are getting,we're shattering the fourth wall now." Lucy groaned out of annoyance as she leaned her head on her fist.
Richard: Soon we found our groove.
Roberta: Still,he kept on trying.
Richard: Super hot.
Roberta: Well sad but sweet.
Richard: Then I made my move.
Roberta: When he finished crying.
Both: Swept her,dropped me,off her feet.
Finally,we were getting jiggy. Finally,his word not mine. Finally,it only took three bottles of wine.
Richard: Think she knows how I feel?
Zombies: Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Roberta: Should I keep my thoughts hid?
Zombies: Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Richard: Should I tell her I love her? Oops,I think I just did.
Both: Finally,finally,finally!
"Aww!" The zombies happily exclaimed in unison as they were the only ones who seemed to care about this sudden musical number as Thibault angrily mumbled remarked "Stupid songs." to which Heather polietly disagreed "I don't mind them actually."
"Well you mostly get used to them after a while." Woodstock shrugged his arms and replied as Richard and Roberta ecstatically walked back to the group. It was clear that they were a full on couple now as Snoopy happily congratulated the two "Congrats on the sudden…...coupleage you two." to which Thibault snarkily told Roberta "You better prepare to make sandwiches your whole life girl,that's the only thing your kind are good for."
"Ow!" Thibault suddenly shrieked in pain as Lucy punched him clean in the jaw and knocked him out temporarily before Richard chuckled and remarked "Thanks for that Lucy,those comments of his were getting very annoying. But anyway if you'll excuse us,my girlfriend and I are gonna go inside and um…...have brunch."
"Oh can I have some too?" Franklin asked out of a sense of hunger since he and the other kids obviously didn't catch onto their suggestive remark while Galavant on the other hand quickly caught on and frankly didn't let them "No guys we'll eat later." In fact once they were both inside Roberta came back out for a brief moment and happily clarified what they were actually doing "We're not having brunch kids,don't come inside." to which Galavant groaned in annoyance "Kill me. Not you Sid or you either Chuck it was just an expression." Snoopy and Woodstock started to quietly giggle at Galavant's joke as Sid sarcastically remarked "Another good one,sir." before he walked off to be by himself while Charlie Brown rolled his eyes in slight embarrassment.
The next morning had soon arrived in Hortensia and it was the day right before the war,Madalena was fully determined to win the war at any cost even if it meant betraying Gareth and using the D'Dew behind his back. While Gareth was busy training the troops and Isabella and the others were desperately trying to scavenge up some weapons,Madalena decided that this was the perfect time to have her audience with Wormwood.
As she quickly snuck through the camp in the hopes of not being spotted,she soon made it to Wormwood's personal tent as she determinedly stated "I'm ready to do whatever I need to join the dark,dark,evil w-" but gasped and recoiled in shock when Wormwood turned around to reveal that he was holding a baby and a knife as he evilly replied "Excellent."
"Oh,god no,sorry. That's behind even me." Madalena laughed out of sheer uncomfortableness since even she wouldn't even resort to killing an infant as Wormwood looked at the baby and the knife in confusion before Madalena suddenly changed her mind "Oh,fine give it here."
"No,no,it''s alright. I'm just babysitting for one of the kitchen staff. I was cutting up a peach for the little chap." Wormwood nervously corrected Madalena and her assumption that he wanted her to kill a baby as the woman apologized for her impulsed reaction "Oh,sorry,I thought you meant…..kcch!" before Wormwood sat the baby down and proceeded with the D'Dew initiation "Ah,right,so the D'Dew,you're interested?"
"Very. I'm in,let's d'do it." Madalena replied with a subtle little joke as Wormwood quickly caught on and complimented her "Oh,god,that's very funny. Hah!" to which she thanked him for the compliment "Thank you." before Wormwood confidently predicted"I think with these powers,you'll definitely win the war. And I think you'll find the D'Dew folks a fun group of people to be with."
"So is there a ceremony or something?" Madalena asked out of curiosity as she was getting more and more excited by the minute before Wormwood corrected her and stated "No,you just sign a contract for your immortal soul."
"Oh." Madalena replied in a little bit of awe that the process was that simple and straightforward as Wormwood handed her the knife and tried to find the contract "Ah,where did I put it?" Once he managed to find the contract he picked up a quill and stated as he tried to hand it to her "Ahh,here,if-" but stopped when he turned around to see that Madalena was suddenly beginning to cut herself with the knife as she whimpered in pain to which he immediately halted her "No,no,no you don't have to sign in blood."
"Huh?" She asked in confusion as the man continued "I just gave you the knife to hold. A-a quill is fine." to which Madalena nervously chucked and wrapped a bandage around her wound. "Yes,but points for enthusiasm though." Wormwood complimented Madalena and her enthusiasm as she signed the contract promplty,she was now officially qualified to use the D'Dew and she was determined to keep it a secret as she kindly asked "If you could,let's just keep this as our little secret. There's no reason Gareth needs to know."
"No." Wormwood evilly chucked in agreement before he continued much more seriously when he noticed that she was standing by the baby "Now please step away from the baby. You really freaked me out before." to which she cheerfully obliged "Yes,sure,of course."
Meanwhile on the other side of the battlefield in Hortensia,Isabella was preparing to have a huge meeting with all of the residents of the kingdom in the palace courtyard. For they had all done what they had been told and gathered everything they could find and placed them in a gigantic pile for Isabella to examine. Linus and the others were also standing in the crowd and patiently waiting for Isabella to come on out as he sighed in nervousness "Tomorrow's the big day everyone. We really gotta make this count." to which Scheroder remarked as he looked at the pile of rubbish "Looks like everyone has found all the stuff they could."
"Yeah and all they found was junk." Violet angrily retorted when all she saw were household appliances and other useless junk before Isabella suddenly came outside and the entire crowd died down as she stated out loud "I want to thank everyone for pitching in,and collecting things we can use as weapons. But…..we may need to sort through and pick out the best bits. Okay? Right?"
"She's dying out there. This is defiantly eating away at her." Marcie nervously remarked when she saw that Isabella's serious and stern tone was quickly devolving into a nervous breakdown as the latter went through the pile of junk "Pots and pans. Very good for bonking heads. A couple of spatulas,a whisk. Weren't there any knives in the kitchen? No? Shame."
"Princess,we just finished the 10 dozen blankets you ordered the cobblers to make." One of the Hortensian guards interrupted Isabella's speech as he entered the courtyard with a large pile of baby blankets like Linus's.
"Okay,that's good. It's clear that if in the right hands,a blanket can be a powerful weapon. So I'm gonna assign all the fighters a blanket and Linus over there can teach you all how to use it." Isabella stated much more confidently and less nervous then before as she pointed to the boy sucking his thumb and holding his blue blanket in the crowd to which he got red in the face and nervously waved his hand free hand around.
"Now,moving on-" Isabella tried to continue her town meeting but a sudden burst of wind blew almost all of the blankets away high into the sky,leaving only 6 of them left as Isabella nervously remarked "Okay…..change of plans…any other weapon ideas? Anyone?" to which one of the peasants in the crowd suggested "I got a potato,it's very pointy." before one of the women confidently added "I didn't find any weapons,but I'm really gonna give those Valencians a piece of my mind."
"Her words can be very cutting." The woman's husband backed her up as Schroeder rolled his eyes and remarked "It just makes me wish that Lucy was here to help us out,and I can't believe we're in a situation where I need to say that." before Isabella overheard him and called out "You got a point there Schroeder,while Lucy and other clearly more capable warriors may not be here,they are at least here in spirit. And well,we may not have much in the way of weapons but uh….we got grit,and determination. Yah!"
However despite Isabella's heartfelt attempt at an inspirational speech,the crowd merely stood there in complete silence as one of the men remarked "I mean,it's a bit desperate isn't it?" to which one of the women nodded her head. The townspeople were all drained of any kind of hope and the others knew they had to do something,or more specifically Peppermint Patty did as she tightly clenched her fist and slowly walked up to the front.
"Yay! Go us! Rarrrrr!" Isabella continued to try and rile the crowd up only to be met with the sound of crickets every time before she suddenly heard the voice of Peppermint Patty as she turned her head to see that she was standing next to her "Hortensians! My name is Patricia,and I come here before you all today to prepare to fight! Me and all of my friends may be foreigners who have never been in a war in our lives before,but we are also people who will not stand for Queen Madalena's reign of terror any longer! And while she does have an army larger than life,we have something that they don't and will never know,humanity! So I ask you all,who will stand up and fight with me and Princess Isabella?!"
However it still seemed that the crowd was still not willing to show support and enthuisam for the war as they all kept silent once again,Patty's energetic and determined war face slowly morphed into a saddened frown as she hung her head and started to head back down to the crowd.
However she would suddenly be halted when she and the others heard the chanting of a young boy "I will!" over and over again,and it turned out that the boy was Linus as Sally and the others quickly joined him. Soon all of the kids were showing Patty some support and true bravery as the rest of the crowd started to slowly join them one by one. Isabella slowly started to smile widely as she walked back to the front of the crowd and raised her arm high up in the air before she yelled "Yahhhhhhhhhhh!" while the crowd continued their chanting.
So while Isabella and Madalena had their armies up and ready to go,the same could unfortunately not be said for Galavant and his group as they were trying endlessly to get the zombies to show some kind of desire to fight. Nighttime had quickly arrived and Galavant and most of the others were out in the courtyard and still trying to motivate the zombies,with Thibault still being knocked out and Richard and Roberta "having brunch."
"Ugh,these guys are useless. Nothing we do is working!" Lucy angrily exclaimed as she sat down on the stairs of the hanging stand to which Charlie Brown sighed and remarked "The only thing we haven't done yet is offer them food,and I think we all know why we can't do that?" Galavant on the other hand was still confident that they could get the zombies to fight as he tried to encourage them "Come on guys,show me something. There's must be more than this aimless amble. You were soldiers once weren't you? Don't you remember any of that? Huh."
"Have we tried doing anything with weapons yet?" Heather asked out of curiosity as Lucy scoffed and retorted "Yeah but it's not like it'll work-"
"Actually no we haven't Heather." Galavant excitedly interrupted Lucy before he commanded the zombies as he pulled out his sword "All right,raise your weapons!" only for the zombies to stay put and not do anything as the others all groaned in annoyance before Galavant continued "Or not?"
"Okay,Pig-Pen's dust won't work,bribery,threatening,and even another musical number won't get them to do anything. It's literally hopeless." Franklin hopelessly went over their past attempts to get the zombies to do anything as Snoopy pondered "How about we try attacking them?"
"What and risk us all getting eaten?" Woodstock disagreed with Snoopy's idea as Galavant immediately decided to test it out "Snoopy's right,maybe you'll respond to danger!" before he ran toward a zombie and raised his sword with the intent to attack,only for the zombie to groan in fear as it passed out on the ground.
"Oh for the love of-" Galavant remarked in utter disbelief and shock as he scoffed and finally gave up "We're gonna fail. We're gonna fail,you guys are right,it's hopeless. We're gonna-" before he sat on the stairs where the others were and continued "And Isabella and the others are gonna die,with Izzy thinking I don't love her,which isn't true. I love her to the very fiber of my being you all know that,and she'll never know."
"Well….at least we tried everyone." Freida regretfully sighed as Charlie Brown made one last suggestion "The way I see it,all we can do now is just have faith that they'll get through it all. And maybe that they'll somehow beat Madalena and come out on top."
"Isabella,no matter what happens,I just wish I could tell you have much I love you…..but you'll never know." Galavant remarked in utter sadness before he suddenly felt someone grab his shoulder as he continued "I'm alright Snoopy,you can let go now.." to which the dog replied in confusion "Uh,it's not me doing that. Look."
Galavant raised an eyebrow out of confusion and slowly turned his head over to the right to see that it was instead one of the zombies grabbing him as it made an "aww" noise before Woodstock remarked in confusion "Uh….they never did that before. Say it again." to which Galavant stated "I love her." before another zombie patted him on the other shoulder.
"Loooooovvvvve." The zombie groaned in its typical gross and hacked voice as Lucy asked in shock and confusion "What's happening here? Are they finally doing something useful?"
"I think so Lucy. I think it's because-"
"I came back from the dead for love." Galavant interrupted Charlie Brown's pondering about what was going on before he asked the zombies out loud "Does love speak to you?" to which all the zombies groaned at once "Looovvveee!"
"They respond to the idea of love. Of course." Snoopy remarked in excitement as he finally figured out what was going on before Galavant stood up and asked the zombies "Will you follow me for love?" to which all the zombies suddenly perked up and stood up tall as the knight walked on top of the hanging stand and straight up yelled "Will you fight with me for love?!"
"Love!" The zombies all proudly cheered as they raised their decaying weapons up in the air before Lucy suddenly smirked and joined Galavant up on the stand as she yelled "Will you fight with all of us for love?!" to which the zombies cheered once again. Soon all the other members of the gang caught onto Lucy's idea as they all walked up onto the stand and asked the same question one by one before Galavant finally asked "Now who's with me,with us?! For love?!" to which the zombies cheered "Love!"
"Love!"
"Love!"
"Love!" Galavant,the others and the zombies cheered one last time before one of the zombie spouted some inane gibberish as Galavant couldn't help but agree with whatever he said "Yes,well said my freind,well said." All three armies were finally up and ready.
The next morning came quicker than they could have ever imagined as the day of the war had finally come and they immediately wasted no time in preparing for their departure from Valencia. Richard and Roberta were busy packing up the last of their things as Richard now wore a brown suit of armor fit for battle before Galavant and the others entered the throne room,and they were also wearing sturdy and powerful suits of armor as well including the kids surprisingly enough as Charlie Brown remarked in awe "You know I'm grateful and all that there was some smaller sized armor for us in the back,but I'm still shocked to think we're all gonna go to war today. It's a little overwhelming sir,and a little tight too."
"Yeah,I wish I could have trained you all properly without having to rush it overnight,but I guess you'll all have to go with what you got." Galavant replied since he realized that he should have trained them more before the great battle as Snoopy nervously added through his now closed helmet "I hope they got war insurance just incase this whole thing goes really bad."
"Oh we'll be fine,and open that helmet a little you'll suffocate." Woodstock confidently retorted as he kicked Snoopy's helmet and opened the face area of it before Galavant suggested "Let's saddle up,it's time for battle."
"And time for Madalena to get what's been coming to her!" Lucy heroically added as Richard agreed with the girl "Right indeed Lucy,I am ready for war. And not just to sit in a comfy chair and watch up on a hill while eating cucumber sandwiches,although that was delightful. No I am actually going to stand next to all of you and fight."
"Sounds like you've finally found your manhood Richard." Galavant proudly remarked as Lucy couldn't help but agree "I mean it took you 50 years too long but,I have to admit you've finally done it. Good on you." to which Richard quietly and playfully retorted "Bobby found it,a bunch of times if you know what I'm saying huh?"
"Unfortunately I do and don't tell the kids." Galavant regrettably replied before Richard lightly punched the knight in the armor,only to recoil in pain as he groaned "Ow. That's really thick armor." to which Pig-Pen replied as his dust cloud turned his armor brown "I think Snoopy got us these from his doghouse,nice of him to keep stuff like this just in case."
"I could have made far better armor than whatever loser made this by myself if we weren't so tight on time." Thibault angrily remarked as he held a few cubes of ice over his jaw where Lucy punched him to which Galavant sighed and retorted "Yeah well that's all we got. Has anyone seen Sid? There's this one strap on my armor I can never get and Chuck is too short at the moment." before he started to head out of the throne room.
"Oh,sorry. He asked me to give you this last night." Richard suddenly replied enthusiastically as he pulled out what seemed to be a note from Sid before he handed it over to the knight.
"More notes? Whatever happened to just talking to people directly?" Lucy groaned and asked to which Galavant ignored her and read the note "I can't stand the shame of having briefly killed the greatest hero in the seven realms along with Chuck. I've left to redeem myself,Sid." He doesn't need to redeem himself,I was just given him and Chuck a hard t-damn it Gal. Mother always said she never knew when I was joking. Oh I hate it when mother's right."
"Wait,so Sid just left like that? I don't think even I would have done that,what are we gonna do?" Charlie Brown nervously asked as Lucy scoffed and retorted "We don't do anything,right now we gotta head to the battlefield quickly." to which Galavant disagreed as he tried to look for Sid "No we still got a little bit of time,I'm gonna go find him. Stay here."
Once Galavant left the throne room to search for Sid,Richard turned towards the throne and remarked out of a sense of nostalgia "Strange being in this room again. It seems like a lifetime ago I sat on that throne,Scheroder used to sit in that exact same sunspot over there and play his tiny piano while Lucy always tried to hook up with him while also berating me at the same time. So much has changed." to which Lucy happily sighed and admitted "I have to say,it is kinda nice being back here again. To be honest I keep on expecting to suddenly wake up in the servant's quarters only to find out that this was all a dream after only a few days of being kidnapped."
"Remember when we all came here in the hopes of taking Richard down and saving Lucy and Schroeder? Only for that to just be the tip of the iceberg?" Charlie Brown asked out of nostalgia as well despite it only being a year ago since it happened as Snoopy took off his helmet and agreed "Yep. Yes I do. And I remember when the three of us were stuck on that boat with Richard and the pirates for weeks and how we all thought we would die thanks to him. Granted we came close a few times,but in the end we didn't and instead became friends…..lifelong friends."
"Good times." Woodstock calmly laughed before Richard smiled and remarked "You know you guys if I ever got the chance to be a king again,I would do things so differently." to which Snoopy chuckled and joked "Something tells me that village we passed by will make you king again once they hear of you fighting in the war."
After a quick laugh from Richard,Snoopy and Woodstock,Roberta suddenly joined in the conversation and nervously stated "Richard,I have to…..tell you something. Alone." to which Charlie Brown and the others instantly took the hint and left the throne room. Once it was just Roberta and Richard in the throne room,she cleared her throat and nervously continued "Um….it's hard to say but,um…..I can't go into battle with you and the others."
Richard was slightly confused at the revelation that she wouldn't be going to war with them as he asked in a still upbeat and happy tone "What are you talking about?" to which Roberta finally let it all out and let her heart do the talking "Richard you and the others are not fighters,and I love you too much to watch you all die and…..you will all die. Horribly. Mutilated. Crying blood."
Richard was starting to get mighty uncomfortable with these graphic descriptions of ways he could possibly die on the battlefield as he scoffed and tried to brush them aside "Okay." but Roberta still wasn't through yet as she continued "Having soiled yourselves with people trying to cut off your heads. People pointing and laughing,gloating on the battlefield. It's gonna be hideous."
"Okay."
"It can be quite fun but not for you."
"Got it."
"I can't be part of that. It'll destroy me." Roberta nervously stated and showed concerns for Richard and the others as he confidently tried to reassure her that he'd be okay "My darling,you worry too much. I'll be fine. Yes perhaps a bit less confident after your very charmingly graphic description,but believe me,we'll be fine."
However Roberta still wasn't keen on having Richard go off to fight the war as she suggested an alternative "Let's forget this whole battle and leave and go build a life for ourselves. My aunt has a farm across the lonely sea,in the shadow of Mount Spinster. It's so beautiful,lots of cats. We can be happy there. I can get us one way tickets and-"
"Bobby." Richard kindly interrupted her emotional babbling as he made up his mind and continued "I have to do this,I can't let Galavant and the others down." to which Roberta retorted on the verge of tears "And I can't watch you die."
"So what are we saying?" Richard nervously asked in fear as Roberta held back tears and choked out "I think we're saying goodbye." before she ran out of the throne room in heartbreak,leaving Richard alone with heartbreak as well. They were breaking up and it hadn't even been a day since they were together. Unbeknownst to Roberta,Snoopy was eavesdropping on the whole thing as he watched it play out through one of the windows,and he was absolutely mortified. He hid himself from Roberta after she left to make sure she didn't find out he was spying on them as he headed back into the throne room where Richard was still standing there heartbroken before he nervously greeted the man "Richard…..did she just-"
"Yes…..yes she did." Richard somberly replied on the verge of tears as Snoopy instantly tried to comfort the man with a hug before Richard continued much more determined and heroic "But it will not be in vain. Come on,let's go!" to which Snoopy let go of Richard and nodded his head before they headed out to the horses to head off.
Outside the outskirts of the castle Galavant and the others were all set up and ready to head out to Hortensia,unfortunately Galavant was unable to find Sid as Charlie Brown asked the knight "So Sid is just gone?" to which he sadlly nodded his head before Woodstock sighed "I hope he pulls it together. The more help we have the better."
Richard and Snoopy soon came on by as they got on their horse without saying a word,Charlie Brown quickly noticed that they seemed disheartened and that Roberta seemed to be absent as he asked in confusion "What's wrong you two? Where's Roberta?" before Richard meekly replied "She's not coming."
"What? Why?" The boy asked in bewilderment before he suddenly noticed Roberta looking down at them in the distance with a saddened and heartbroken frown,and that was all he needed to know what happened as he gasped in shock "Awww. Sorry Richard." to which Woodstock glanced at her for a brief moment and sighed in disappointment.
Lucy however wasn't too bothered by this since she merely brushed it aside in determination "Keep it together you guys,it's the point of no return here everyone. Let's end this once and for all,no matter what happens." to which Richard did so and heroically replied "Lucy's right,let's make this sacrifice worth it." before he and Snoopy also noticed Roberta as they both concluded "For love."
"For love!" Galavant and the others all yelled in determination to which the zombies yelled as well "For love!" before they all marched to their final destination,Hortensia,where the fates and lives of so many people would be in the balance.
Isabella: It's a dark season and its been all along,a grim season,there's no point in pretending.
Gareth: For some reason we're still singing this song.
Madalena: But this time with a d'doozy of an ending.
"What just happened?" Gareth asked out of shock when he noticed Madalena's eyes suddenly turn dark red as she nervously replied "What?" before Gareth continued "I thought-"
"Oh look a squirrel!"
Sid: Now I must ride to somewhere to do something to atone.
Roberta: I'll cross the lonely sea to spend my lonely life alone,beyond the bitter desert,in the shadow of Mount Spinster,with a bunch of stupid cats!
Richard: Now this season needs a hero.
Galavant: And he's on his way!