Chapter 36- I promise you
You closely examine your naked reflection in the mirror. The bump is only noticeable when you're undressed but your breasts are clearly swollen; in a few weeks none of your bras will fit you… You notice her leaning against the doorframe "Mmm, sexy…", she smiles.
You turn around and smile at her "People must be wondering if I had a boob job…".
"Like you need one… You're perfect, baby…", she comes closer, embracing you.
"Let's see if you say that in a few months…", you giggle.
Abby chuckles and lays kisses down your neck and chest, kissing all the way down to your tummy "Did you hear that, little ones? Mummy can be very loony, sometimes…", she whispers to your bellybutton… You pet her hair tenderly, as she continues to stroke and kiss your stomach.
When she stands up, she entangles a finger in your hair "I should go with you…".
You shake your head "Believe me, you don't want to meet the Lewis clan, right now…".
Everyone is still outraged with the news. But Aunt Sarah loves you very much and she's the only one who's been supportive…
"We should be facing this together…".
"Don't worry, I can handle them. I'm just worried about my father, he's not returning my calls…", you mutter.
"Are you sure you're going to be okay?", she says, tilting your chin in her direction.
"I'm sure… Now go, residents don't get to arrive late", you smirk.
She comes close to kiss you, smiles against your lips "You're pulling rank on me?".
"Someone has to be in charge…", you slur back at her.
"I love when you are…", she pauses to kiss you "…in charge…", she frames your face in her hands, that sexy smile you love in her face…
---
"Happy birthday, Aunt Sarah…", you greet as she hugs you affectionately.
"I'm glad you came, sweetheart!", she smiles as she closes the door behind you.
"Who's here?", you gauge as you hang your coat.
When she shrugs you know everyone turned up… you're the new freak show in town…
Dinner goes uneventful. You try to smile at your cousin's Jack lame jokes but you can't help noticing how tense your father looks. Jack, as the great asshole he is, smirks at you "So… Suse. We were hoping you would bring that friend of yours…". Giggles.
"Which friend?", you smirk back at him, your tone full of irony.
He shares looks with his sister "Huh… that special friend of yours…".
What an ass.
You place down your fork and knife, look at him straight in the eyes "You mean my girlfriend?".
You think you can hear him gasp. You realize it's the first time you've referred to Abby as your girlfriend… In your head, she's always just Abby.
Aunt Sarah comes to the rescue "I'd like to meet her…", she smiles.
"She had a shift tonight…", you say, looking at your father who keeps on eating, like he's not paying attention.
"She's a doc, too?", Uncle Joe inquires.
"Yes, she's a resident at County…"
"So that's why you were never lucky with men!". This is Joan's idea of a joke…
You stare at her "That coming from someone who's going to get married for the fourth time…", you scoff. She glares at you.
You sigh "It just happened that all the qualities I was looking for were in this person and that person happened to be a woman…" you're obviously not going to explain how everything started between you and her…
After dinner, you notice your father in the terrace. You go talk to him.
"Hey dad…". He doesn't move, so you settle next to him.
"Look… I know this is hard for you… but I'm still the same person. I love you, dad and I'd like my children to know their grandfather…".
"When they realize that all their friends have a mother and a father, what you gonna say then?", he faces you.
"They have a father, too. And I'll tell them that they have two mothers that love them more than anything in this world..."
---
You don't know why it's called 'morning sickness' if it goes on all day… you fan yourself and drink some water. Abby gets home, all excited, her arms full of bags from the grocery shop.
"Are you feeling better?", she asks from the kitchen.
"Not really…"
"You should take some Compazine… Oh, look what I've bought…", she smiles throwing you one of the bags.
You smile at the two tiny t-shirts with 'I love my mommies' embroidered in their fronts…
"It's so cute, Abby…".
She sits next to you, "hey… you're crying?".
"Damn hormones…", you say wiping the tears away.
"Aw, come here…", you snuggle into her and she kisses the top of your head.
"I'm so scared…", you finally confide.
She tightens her embrace "I know. I am, too. But we have each other, we have friends and I know we'll be okay. We can do this, Susan…".
---
Your eyes get lost in the placidity of the suburbs. You're only twenty minutes away from the city, but it feels so far away. Trees dance as the warm breeze tickles them, you look at Abby, as her fingers tap along the steering wheel.
Her long hair has now some graceful curls and you let your left hand rest on the nape of her neck. She smiles, her eyes still on the road, stretches her neck to let your fingers trail up and down, under her dark mass of hair.
Today is the big day, you're moving in to the new house. Your apartment was barely big enough for you two, let alone with two babies on the way… You made a good deal selling it and saw a few houses but you both fell instantly in love with this place. Four bedrooms, a lovely lounge, a little garden and a backyard for the kids. It was a little over what you wanted to pay, but it's definitely worth it .
"We're here", Abby chirps as she parks in front of your new address. You get out of the car and just take a deep breath of fresh air.
When you enter the house, you hardly recognize it. Last time you were here, half of the furniture hadn't been delivered, it looks so different now. Abby took a few days off to arrange everything, stubbornly insisting that you shouldn't worry with anything…
"So… does it look okay?", she asks nervously.
"Everything is so perfect… I can't believe all this…", you whisper in awe.
---
Since you found out you were pregnant, Abby rubs your stomach, breasts and thighs with some anti-stretch marks cream every night. She does it so willingly, like it's some kind of ritual. You find your eyes welling up most of times, just by the look on her face: how tenderly she strokes your stomach and talks to your growing belly…
She will always start with your breasts, which always leaves you both pretty excited and then descends to your stomach and strokes it lazily, kissing it lovingly and resting her ear against it, lost in the sounds of the babies moving and kicking around… Then her hands go lower and she massages your thighs and that's when the real fun begins… Let's just say that everything they say about a pregnant woman's sex drive is pretty much true…
The first time you felt them moving inside you, you were running the board with Pratt and you felt like your insides were being rummaged through … It felt so alien, but yet so incredible… Abby actually cried the first time she felt them kicking. And then you cried too, which isn't that surprising, everything gets you nowadays…
She's now listening to their heart-beats with her stethoscope. You smile at how absorbed and faraway she looks… like she's daydreaming.
"Everything okay…", she winks. Then she curls behind to you, her hand gliding along the already prominent curve of your belly, intertwining her fingers with yours.
---
Slowly, your eyes focus on the sleeping beauty besides you. You yawn and stretch your limbs, loving the softness of the sheets against your skin. On your side, you throw a leg across her hips and slide your hand up her ribcage, press your lips on her throat, nibble just a little…
She moans something, flutters her eyes. "Morning…", she murmurs, sleepily.
"Good morning…", you whisper in her ear, she smiles with closed eyes.
Oh well, you know how to wake her…
You tunnel under the sheets, your hands and mouth trailing that path you've done so many times before… You spread her legs and your tongue makes sure she wakes up in a good mood. Your hands reach up and tease her nipples, she keeps your hands on her breasts, her moans increasingly bolder…
Abby climaxes and you look up when you hear a loud bang. "Ouch! Oh, fuck…", she flinches after accidentally punching the headboard.
You chuckle and rest your chin on her stomach, admiring her chest undulating… you cup one of her breasts "What a view…", you smile, kissing her flat abdomen.
She looks down and smiles, pulling you up. You lay your head next to her, hogging her pillow.
"What a wake-up call…", she says, leaning to kiss you.
---
Later that day, you work on a couple involved in a MVA. He has minor injuries, but she's in bad shape. Plus, she's pregnant. She has massive internal bleeding and going into premature labor… You can't save both.
You and Chen work on her. You feel rattled when she starts convulsing. Jing-Mei senses your discomfort and asks Luka to cover for you. You nod at her in appreciation and leave the trauma room breathless and overwhelmed. That woman is 7 months pregnant, just like you…
Abby is talking to the husband. You overhear her telling him that he will have to decide what the next course of action will be… Choose between his dying wife or his unborn child…
You discard your bloody gown and head to the elevators. You hide in your office, hoping they don't need you downstairs for the rest of the day…
A few hours later, Abby comes to check on you. She looks worriedly at you "Hey, how are you? You disappeared…".
You look at her "What happened to them?".
She stares at you quietly for a moment "The baby didn't make it…", she mutters.
You feel your eyes watering, you blink back the tears, close your eyes.
"Baby, you shouldn't get nervous like this… I was worried about you…", she says, taking your hands in hers.
You nod in silence and face her "Promise me one thing…", you start.
"What?".
"I need you to promise me that if something happens during birth or something…", Abby lays her fingers on your lips.
"Shush, don't say that…", she shakes her head slowly.
You remove her hand from your face "Just listen to me… If something happens, I want you…".
She shakes her head vigorously "Stop saying that, ok? Nothing will happen!".
"Abby!", you speak up to regain her attention. "You know the dozens of things that can go wrong during labor…". She tries to speak, but you held your hand up.
"If it comes to the point where you have to choose between me and the babies… I want you to promise me that you'll make sure nothing happens to them…", you clutch her hand, she keeps on shaking her head, now with wet eyes, too.
"I can't do that, Susan…".
You're about to protest, but she holds your face in her hands, looking closely at you. "But I promise you that everything will be okay. You hear me? We'll be okay, the four of us. I promise you that.".