Okay, this is a repost for this chapter. I really didn't like the way it ended so I decided to give it another go.
It hurt to know that they only wanted what they wanted for themselves. And she cried because of that. She cried because it hurt to know Ma didn't want her to be friends with a deaf girl. Lucy cried because they didn't want her happy. She cried because they thought that she couldn't understand what was right for her. She cried because Joe was in the middle of it all.
Joe held on to her, holding he close as he whispered in her ear. Her crying, from what he normally heard was different. Her hands were pressed to her ears as she screamed almost like an animal, a grunting cry that changed pitch as she rocked. It was like she was trying to get whatever was in her head out. Like she was over stimulated.
"I haven't had an episode in a while, it happened when Dane had attacked me and my Pops denied his friend wouldn't have done that. I freaked out to the point they needed to sedate me in the hospital." Lucy had told him once during a conversation. "If I ever have one again, these are the pills I'm supposed to be given." She showed him the medicine bottled and told him the dose to give her.
He didn't know what he could do, but he knew that Lucy needed help. She needed her medication to stop this episode. Picking up Lucy into his arms, Joe carried her back the way they came. Her hands over her ears, she was still rocking and screaming, crying at the same time. Holding her like this was hard to do, she just wouldn't sit still, but on his life he wasn't going to let her down, physically and emotionally.
"What the hell did you do to my sister?" Matt demanded as Joe came out of the forest with Lucy in his arms.
"It wasn't me, blame your parents. Dan! Christi! I need your help!" Joe yelled,
Christi ran out of the house, Dan followed with his parents and John and Nikki, of all people.
"Her pills are in her backpack." Joe said, looking at Christi. "They're in her room."
"Yeah, I got it." Christi turned and went back into the house.
"She don't need those pills." Carol said as Joe set Lucy down on the picnic table. "She needs her family." She had tears rolling down her face.
"Her real family died when she was five years old." Joe glanced at the older woman. "They let her be a child, the let her be what she wanted." His hands were holding Lucy's head, preventing her from rocking. "They didn't fill her head with crap, they loved her, they actually loved her. They wouldn't want her to be like this, a woman who didn't know what she wanted out of life. They wouldn't break her like this."
She was broken.
Lucina, his little light, was broken.
Joe watched Lucy rock back and forth, even when the anti-anxiety was given to her, Lucy wasn't responding. She had fought with him, making him loose his grip. She cried and screamed, she kept rocking back and forth.
"Too much, too much..." she said through gritted teeth. "Make them stop, Momma."
"Momma's here..." Carol went to reach for Lucy.
"Her Momma's six feet under." Joe said, making the woman stop. "Her Momma told her that her eyes were as green as sea turtles."
She heard him; Lucy just barely could hear him now.
"She's seen them, when she was with me." Joe continued. "We went to SeaWorld together, the first thing we did was to see the turtles."
Lucy could hear him closer, the memories fading slowly. The memories of her time with Joe, with her friends started speaking louder. All she had to do was focus on Joe, on the man that she loved...it would all go away like it had before.
"Then when she met my family she saw one closer up. We watched it together, her back to my front, her safely wrapped in my arms. She didn't have to worry about anything. She didn't have to worry about a family that made her cry. Or the bullying she got from her brother's girlfriend. She was with me. She was with friends, she was with people who called her cousin, sister, daughter. She was happy, she was proud, she didn't have to think about what you thought about any of it, she refused to let you come between her and her happiness. But look what you did...you caused this."
"Joe..." her voice was small and raspy from the crying and screaming.
He looked at her, a tear falling down his face as she pulled him to her. Lucy held onto him, breathing in his familiar scent. Joe rubbed her back as her heels hooked in behind his knees, his head leaning down on top of his.
"I want to go home." Her voice was muffled against his body before she looked at him, eyes red from crying.
"Where's home for you, Babygirl?" He asked.
"With you."
"I'll call you a cab. And I'll get your things together." Dan added, leaving with his wife. "Don't you kill him. Out of everyone here he's the one that I trust her the most with."
She wouldn't look at anyone. She just stared at the earth in front of her. Joe didn't want to leave her, not in this state but...something told him to. He said he needed to go make arrangements with the hotel leaving her there. Joe knew it was a foolish thing to do, but it had to be done.
"Lucy." She looked at John. "I'm so sorry." When she didn't answer he continued. "None of this would have happened if I'd just let you go."
"John..." Nikki grabbed his arm. "None of this would have happened if she just stayed where she was supposed to."
"Bitch." All eyes were on Lucy now. "All you said was that I'm worthless. I believed that. You said that I was not beautiful. No man would want me. When I did, when I proved you wrong...you went to my brother. Your sister was having an affair with Randy Orton, you knew this and you didn't say anything. Yes, Joe was wrong for doing the same thing she was guilty for. But you made him out to be like a monster. He's not." Lucy slowly looked up at Nikki. "You're the monster. He's my beautiful, he's my prince, my knight...he stood there while I found my footing. And all you wanted to do was take it away from me because I wasn't walking the path you wanted. My path is where my feet are."
"Lucy..." Carol started to say.
"My name is Lucina Edith Ferguson. My mother is Eileen Ferguson, my father is Patrick Ferguson. The only people I count as family are Dan and Christi. The rest of you...you're nothing more than strangers to me. I'm going home. When I get back to the WWE, I'm quiting at the end of my contract."
"And what are you going to do? Become a writer? Live off of some man's pay check? A man who says he loves you?" Carol spoke up as Lucy started walking away.
"That's not what you're supposed to do, Lucina. You're supposed to be..."
"I'm done listening to you, to all of you. As far as I'm concerned, none of you have the right to talk to me anymore." Lucy snapped. "I'm not your daughter, I never was. Have a happy life without me."
During the cab ride back to Boston, Lucy's phone rang. She reached for it and looked at the screen. "Shawn, what is it?" She asked.
Joe thought she was talking to her brother Sean, but he found that she wasn't yelling at him.
"Wait, what do you mean a judge has sped up the trial?" She asked. "I thought he took a plea deal."
Definitely not the brother Sean.
"Yeah, yeah. Just tell me when the trial stars and I will get the allotted time off. Thank you, Shawn, um, no don't tell them. We're not on real good speaking terms right now. If you want, you can, but I would rather you not. Thank you, I will." Then she hung up the cell phone. "Well that isn't what I was anticipating."
"What? What's going on, Babygirl?"
"My trial, against Dane Thomas, the man that tried to rape me, has been redone. He was supposed to have taken a plea deal but he changed his Guilty plea to Not Guilty, by reason of insanity. There is going to be a court date for next week to see if he is found sane enough to stand trial. And then the actual court proceedings will happen soon after that if he's proven competent."
"You have to be there for the court hearing?"
"Yeah, I guess. But...that means I'll have to take time off from the show and stay here for the rest of the court stuff." She motioned to the moving scenery outside the cab. "I feel better if I'm with you, the guys, I finally found Sophia after so many years."
"Look, Babygirl, let's just get you back to the hotel and we'll call Stephanie about all of this." He pushed her hair from her face. "Come on, look at me. I know you'll be strong no matter what happens. You've come a long way right now, you've fought so hard to get to where you're at right now...with me."
"I'm sick of fighting, Joe. It's too tiring."
"Nothing comes to those who wait." He said, rubbing her cheek with his thumb gently.
"Home is where the heart is, and mine's with you." She responded.
"You'll have Dan and Christi, and your niece. If the rest of them don't want to be in your life, to support you, then you have every right to forget them. You're a Ferguson, not a Cena. You have my family behind you. I'm sure Dwayne would love to drop in if he's not too busy and I'll try to get time off to come to come support you." He wiped away her silent tears. "Be strong for me, Babygirl."
"For you I will."
But being strong was hard to keep up with.
I think I did a better job with this one. It just felt a little off from what I had written last time. This time it would give me a chance to 'fix' some broken bridges within the plot structure.