Hope everyone's having a good week. Enjoy.
-d-d-d-d-
"Coffee?" Kate asked as she wandered into the kitchen.
"Just made it," Alexis smiled. "Late night, Kate?"
"Not the way you think," Kate smiled. "Where's Ryan?"
"Jogging."
"Any of the kids up yet?"
"Not that I've heard," Alexis shook her head.
"What smells so good?"
"Pear and honey muffins," Alexis smiled. "Dad and I hit the Farmer's Market on the way up yesterday. He promised to make strawberry pancakes."
"You're the only one that can get him to make those," Kate smiled.
"Not true," Alexis shook her head. "If Maggie or Jo give him the Bambi eyes, he'd do anything."
"Very true," Kate nodded just as she heard the door open and Kevin entered. "Morning, Ryan."
"Morning," Kevin responded a bit out of breath.
"Coffee?" Alexis held up a cup.
"Cop can't live it without it," Kevin took the cup from her immediately, resisting the urge to kiss her cheek
"I'm gonna get the paper," Kate excused herself with a smile.
"Kate has excellent timing," Alexis kissed Kevin the instant they were alone.
"How'd you sleep?" he smiled.
"I've slept better. I've slept worse," she replied, "You?"
"That couch is pretty comfortable," Kevin nodded.
"I would've slept better if you'd been in bed with me," Alexis whispered.
"Yes, but I think I would have ended up in a ditch somewhere," Kevin chuckled.
"Possibly," Alexis smiled. "I would've rescued you."
"If you'd known where to look," he replied, "Your dad is a writer. I'm sure he'd invent a crazy place to stash me.
All at once they heard thundering footsteps charging down the stairs.
"Sounds like a herd of elephants are approaching," Alexis laughed. Several of the children rounded the corner as Alexis and Kevin parted.
"Where's Grandpa?" Maggie asked. "I want pancakes."
"I think he's still sleeping, Princess," Alexis bent down and kissed the top of her daughter's head.
Maggie frowned and then smiled, "I'll wake him. C'mon Jo!"
"Guys, wait," Alexis started but the girls were off and running. "Oh well. I want pancakes too."
"I heard the stampede," Kate returned with the paper in her hands.
"Girls went up to wake Dad and the boys are-"
SPLASH!
"Out on the deck," Kate finished.
"Do you mind?" Alexis asked Kevin.
"You want me to pull them out?" he asked
"Just make sure they don't drown each other," Kate said.
"Will do," Kevin head out to keep an eye of the swimmers.
"Thanks," Kate nodded and then smiled at her friend's daughter as she came in. "Morning, Sarah Grace. I was wondering where you were."
Sarah Grace gave her a slight wave, but Alexis could see sadness in your eyes.
"You okay, Sweetie?" Kate put an arm around her shoulder.
"Not really," the ten year old shook her head. "Where's my dad?"
"Out on the deck," Alexis motioned.
Sarah Grace nodded and went out to sit next to him.
"You okay?" Kate asked her stepdaughter after seeing the sad look in her eyes.
"Her mother is never coming home, Kate."
"That was her own doing," Kate replied.
"I know, but I can't help feel a little responsible for this."
"You and Kevin are being entirely too hard on yourselves," Kate insisted.
"I love him, Kate," Alexis said.
"He loves you. Alexis, I found him in the hallway the night you were stabbed. He looked like his whole world had just collapsed."
"God, this entire situation just sucks," Alexis sighed.
"Yes, it does, but it will get better," Kate smiled. "I think your muffins are done."
"Oh, crap, I almost forgot about them," Alexis turned around and quickly pulled them out of the oven. They were a bit overdone but still edible.
"They look good," Kate smiled. "Where'd you get the recipe?"
"Chris's old partner, Meredith."
"I might have to get that from you."
"Which one of you sent these two little monsters to wake me up?" Rick entered dragging his foot as Maggie was hanging onto his leg and Jo was over his shoulder. Both were giggling with each step he took.
Alexis and Kate looked at each other and then back at Rick before saying in unison, "Kevin."
"Nuh-uh," Maggie challenged her mother, "You did it, Mommy."
"Traitor," Alexis bent down to be eye level with her daughter. "Didn't we agree you wouldn't tell on Mommy anymore?"
"No," Maggie shook her head vigorously from side to side.
"Well, is Grandpa going to make pancakes?"
"Perhaps if someone asks nicely," Rick took a cup of coffee from his wife.
"Jo, come here," Alexis motioned to her half-sister and put all their heads together and whispered for a moment before all three girls turned their pouts on Richard and said, "Please?"
"Talk about being ganged up on," Rick laughed.
"Is that a yes, or do we need to get Kate in on the act?"
"Enough," Rick began pulling items out of the cabinet to make his pancakes.
"Yes!" Maggie danced around.
"I'll go get the boys," Alexis started for the deck.
"Leave them," Rick waved his hand. "We'll eat outside."
"Good idea," Kate nodded.
-d-d-d-d-d-
It was mid-afternoon and Alexis was sitting on the edge of the deck watching her dad and Kevin chase around after all the kids on the beach when Kate sat down next to her. Her stepmother handed her a glass of iced tea.
"Thanks," Alexis smiled. "Dad mentioned something about the grill for dinner tonight."
"Yeah," Kate nodded, "Let's hope he doesn't burn dinner."
"Again," Alexis added with a laugh.
"Distracted, my ass," Kate snorted while recalling her husband's last attempt at grilling that had resulted in nothing more than charcoal.
Alexis giggled before she sobered, "Sarah Grace seems to be coming out of her shell a little."
"Kevin's cell phone rang again. I think it was Jenny's parents."
"That's gonna be a fun conversation."
"I certainly don't envy him and the position he's in."
"Neither do I," Alexis agreed quietly. "It was bad enough telling my dad. Kevin said he just blurted it out with you."
"I've been looking for a way to talk to you about all of that," Kate replied.
"I was wondering when you were gonna get around to it," Alexis nodded. "I know your loyalty is first and foremost to Kevin. I'm okay with that."
"How did it all start?" Kate asked.
"It was just coffee at first," Alexis said. "His marriage was going to hell, and he needed to talk to someone who wouldn't automatically tell him to try and fix things with Jenny."
"So you were just friends first?"
"Yeah," Alexis nodded.
"How did it progress to more?"
"I can't pinpoint the exact moment it changed, but I can tell you when we acted on it," Alexis said.
"Kevin already told me it was the weekend Rick and I went to visit my aunt," Kate replied.
"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "God, I freaked out the next morning. I woke up, saw him laying there, and panicked."
"So what happened?"
"I got up, got dressed, and left the loft," Alexis confessed. "I figured if I stayed gone long enough he'd leave. Of course, in my haste, I left my cell phone. When I called it, he answered. He said he was holding my phone hostage until I agreed to talk to him."
"You can tell me it's none of my business, but it's the mother in me coming out. You were safe, weren't you?"
"We were," Alexis nodded, "Most of the time. Obviously once we forgot, or it malfunctioned."
"After he got you talking to him," Kate prodded her.
"Right," Alexis nodded. "I met with him after work at Gram's old studio. He said he wasn't sorry. I realized I wasn't either, at least not about being with him. I was sorry for sleeping with a married man and for how it would hurt his wife if she found out."
Kate sighed a little at the thought of what Jenny had pulled, trying to keep her marriage together. She had loved Alexis like a daughter and as a friend for even longer. Because of some misguided feeling of right and wrong, Alexis had nearly left this world.
"Kate?"
"I'm sorry," Kate shook her head. "I was just thinking."
"I figured," Alexis offered her wrist to Kate with a grin, "Wanna take my pulse to reassure yourself that I'm still here?"
"It still seems impossible what Jenny pulled," Kate shook her head.
"Tell me about it," Alexis sighed. "Don't tell my dad this, but I'm glad she came after me and not Hunter or Kevin."
"I'd rather she dealt with everything like a normal human being," Kate replied.
"That would've been nice," Alexis's eyes found Sarah Grace on the beach. "I walked away from Kevin because I didn't want him to lose his daughter. The night I left, he said he loved me. I told him to love someone else."
"But he couldn't do it," Kate replied.
"If he'd stopped or caught me, I don't know what would've happened," Alexis confessed tearfully.
"You can't look back, Lex," Kate responded.
"It's hard not to sometimes," Alexis said. "It's also hard to look at Sarah Grace and know that her world is about to fall apart."
Kate rubbed Alexis's back as they both watched the kids run around with Kevin and Rick.
"Are you hungry?" Kate asked her stepdaughter, "How much effort do you think it will take to get the guys in to do a bit of grilling?"
"Depends on how hungry they all are," Alexis stated before calling out to the kids. Sure enough they were all famished and practically begged Rick and Kevin to start dinner.
"Come on, Mags," Alexis said. "Let's get that sand off of you. Boys, before you go diving into the pool, I want you to use the shower, too."
"Jo, Jamie, Ian, that goes for you too," Kate said.
There was a chorus of moans as the children marched into house to rinse off while Rick and Kevin began working on getting the grill going.
"Sarah Grace, do you want to shower off?" Kate asked.
"Yes, please," she nodded hesitantly.
"Come on, then," Kate encouraged her.
Hunter and Cade came tearing back out and cannon balled into the pool, sending a spray towards Rick and Kevin.
"Kate, did you need help with dinner?" Alexis offered.
"Yeah, come make that potato salad you're so good at," Kate nodded. "I'll work on the barbecue sauce. Jo, make sure you and Maggie stay in the shallow end please."
Kate's daughter bobbed her head before she called out for her father to watch her cannonball demonstration.
Alexis's brothers sped past her and letting out identical 'bonsai' yells landed in the pool with splashes.
"They are way too much like Dad," Alexis sighed.
"Good thing Jo's like Kate," Kevin smiled.
"Tell me about it. Dad might be able to get rid of Gram's studio after all."
"He still has it?"
"Yeah," Alexis nodded. "He kept it in case one of my kids or siblings got bitten by the acting bug."
"I'm surprised you didn't," Kevin munched on a piece of cheese. "Your mom's an actress and so was your grandma."
"I don't think I'm dramatic enough."
"True. You are frighteningly down to earth."
"That's my father's influence," Kate replied.
"What do you mean?" Kevin asked.
"Jim's the one who steered me towards medical school. Though he wanted me to go to school in Pennsylvania."
"Why Pennsylvania?" Kevin asked.
"One of his friends was on faculty at Llanview University and actually Dad agreed with him. I have family there."
"How'd you decide on Tulane then?"
"Distance," Alexis said quietly. "Seemed like a good idea."
"Can we talk after dinner?"
"Yeah, maybe," Alexis nodded.
"Here," Kate handed Kevin a plate of steaks and burgers, "Give these to Castle and get cooking."
"Yes, Ma'am," Kevin took the plate and headed back outside.
Alexis got to work on her potato salad.
"You know, if you'd lived in Pennsylvania, you never would have met Christopher," Kate said.
"I know," Alexis nodded, "I'm grateful for my decision because he was a wonderful man and father."
"But?"
"I don't know."
"It's okay to second guess your decision. It doesn't mean that you loved Chris any less."
"God, I miss him," Alexis hugged herself for a moment as a chill went down her spine.
"I know you do," Kate gave her a hug. "What did he always tell you to remember if something went wrong?"
"That we'd see each other again someday," Alexis recalled.
"And you will," Kate replied.
"Thanks, Kate," Alexis smiled.
"Of course," Kate smiled.
Give me back my floaties, Cade!
"Remind me again, why did I want children?" Alexis went out to the deck.
Kate snorted as she took over Alexis's potato salad.
d=d=d=d
Kevin looked out through the French doors at the beach laid out before him. His eyes were on Alexis as she sat on the beach, watching the waves crash against the shore, seemingly in her own little world.
"Go on," Rick encouraged. "I think you two need to talk."
Kevin opened the door. Before he knew it he was standing next to her with a light sweatshirt in his hands that he wrapped around her shoulders.
"You looked chilled," Kevin explained when she jumped mildly in surprise.
"Thanks," she played with the cuffs of the shirt he'd given her. "Why don't you sit down?"
Kevin took a seat in the sand next to her. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm better. It's been nice to sleep in a real bed," Alexis smiled. "Kate said you and Sarah Grace were going to a hotel tonight."
"Yeah, I can't bring myself to go back to our apartment in the city just yet, and it's a bit crowded here at the beach house," Kevin explained.
"Javi called to check on me. He said you and Jenny got pretty loud when you went into interrogation."
"It wasn't my finest moment," he frowned, "I figured it was okay to lose my cool this time. It's not every day you find out that your wife hired someone to murder the woman you love."
Alexis looked at him, "Are you okay?"
"Are you?"
"I felt threatened when Jenny came to me all those years ago and told me if I didn't end it with you she'd take Sarah away from you, but I never thought she'd take it this far."
"I know the feeling," he nodded, "I was married to the woman for over a decade. How could I not know?"
"I feel responsible," Alexis frowned, "It was our involvement that started all of this. It's because of us that Sarah Grace will have to grow up without her mother."
"This is not your fault."
"If I hadn't come back here after Christopher died then-"
"I would've come to you."
"What?"
"When your dad told us you were married, I felt like I was sleepwalking. I feel bad for saying this, but when he told us Christopher had been killed, and it was like I woke up. I was going to give you time to grieve and get myself free. When all of that was done, I was coming after you."
"You make it sound like I was one of those perps that you've spent your career chasing," Alexis replied.
"You are anything but," he took her hand and brought it to his lips.
Alexis smiled at him and leaned close to put her forehead against his, "He met you, you know… Christopher."
"When?" Kevin was surprised by the revelation.
"Chris's lawyer had a letter for me after everything was settled. I didn't read it right away because everything was still too raw. A few nights before I was stabbed, I couldn't sleep, so I read it. After Cade was born, Chris started thinking how he'd feel if things were reversed and you were raising his son. That's the first time he said I should tell you."
"He sounds like a good man," Kevin replied, "I probably would have liked him, that is if we didn't both love the same woman."
"He came up to the city and tracked you down. I'm not sure how the meeting happened, but he said something about a bar, a few beers, and some war stories. He also told me that he'd never seen someone trying so hard to pretend that he wasn't completely miserable."
"Do you have a picture of him?" Kevin asked, "Maybe it would jar the memory."
"Not on me," Alexis shook her head. "There are some in the house though. The important part is the end of the letter. It's part of how I knew Chris was getting to me when we first got together. I'd had a really bad day, and he was the first person I thought of when I wanted to talk to someone. To this day, I still have that same feeling. He said when that changed, it was okay."
"That day you cancelled on me," Kevin thought out loud. "We were supposed to get a drink."
"It was the first time in over eight years that I'd had a bad day, and he wasn't the first person I thought of when I wanted to talk to someone," Alexis nodded.
"And that is okay," Kevin replied.
"I miss him," she frowned, "I feel like I'm betraying him. He hasn't even been gone for a year, and I'm already thinking about moving on. How can I do that to him? I loved him…I still love him."
"And he loved you," Kevin told her. "If it'd been you that died, how long would you want him to wait?"
"As long as he needed," she replied.
"Everyone grieves differently, Lex."
"I love you," she said softly. "Please believe that."
"I've never doubted it, even after all these years."
Alexis shifted so that she was leaning against Kevin's chest, sitting between his legs, her head tipped back on his shoulder, "How do we do this? Sarah is ten, and you still have to tell her that her mother's never coming home again. Hunter is eight, and I have to tell him that the man he called 'dad' isn't his biological father."
"We take it one step at a time," he held her close remembering nights they'd done this with nothing but sheets between them, "We don't need to tell Hunter anything just yet. He's still grieving for Chris."
"And Sarah Grace?" Alexis asked, "What do we tell her?"
Kevin sighed, "I don't know. Jenny's parents keep calling. I don't know what to say to them."
"The truth works," Alexis wasn't able to keep the bitterness out of her voice.
"That while married to their daughter I fell in love with the daughter of one of my best friends," Kevin snickered.
"They raised a psychopath."
"Yeah, I don't see that going over well."
"No, it won't," she played with Kevin's hand without looking and then raised her head to stare at his hand, "When did you stop wearing your wedding ring?"
"When I decided to divorce her," he explained.
"You really wanted to give us a chance, didn't you?"
"Every day since you left New York," Kevin confessed.
"I can't imagine how hard that must have been for you," she replied, "You didn't tell anyone about us?"
"I almost told my sister," he replied, "I really wanted to get it out, but I just couldn't. I guess I didn't want to see that disappointing look on her face."
"Gwen?"
"Yeah," Kevin shook his head.
"How is she?"
"She and Frank are doing okay," Kevin nodded. "We should get back to the house. It's getting late."
Alexis inhaled, "A few more minutes? I like this."
"How can I turn down the offer to spend more time alone with you?"
Alexis giggled, "Charmer."
"So where are we, Lex?" he asked.
"We're slowly approaching the point where I ask you to stay the night after you bring me home from a date," Alexis turned her head to look at him.
"It would be nice to wake up next to you outside of a hospital," he allowed himself to fantasize for a moment.
"Yes, it would," Alexis nodded. "It's been a long time since we did."
"Too long," he agreed.
"I like this," Alexis admitted as she let her head fall back against his shoulder again and closed her eyes.
"You have no idea," Kevin said as he grinned against her neck.
-d-d-d-d-
Rick finished putting the dishes away and closed the dishwasher. Kate watched him with a smile.
"What?"
"Sometimes I forget how domestic you can be," Kate smiled.
"Because I'm doing dishes?"
"You cooked and cleaned tonight," she reminded him.
"It felt nice to do something normal after everything we've just been through," Rick admitted.
"It has been a stressful time for us all."
"Where's Alexis?" he looked over his wife's shoulder.
"She and Kevin came up from the beach and are sitting out by the pool. Sarah Grace is asleep upstairs with Maggie and Jo."
"I'm still not fully okay with all of this, but…"
"You're such a sucker for a happy ending," she teased.
"He loves her," Castle smiled. "I am still in shock about that, but he does."
"Does that mean you've forgiven me for not telling you when I found out?"
"Yes," he nodded. "Should we join them outside?"
"No," Kate wrapped her arms around his shoulders, "We should leave them alone."
"Yeah, you're probably right," Rick smiled. "Where are the boys?"
*Crash!*
"Playing in the living room," Kate winced.
They both darted towards the living room to survey the damage.
"Well, I never liked that vase, and Mother's Tony is still in one piece."
"We're sorry," the boys apologized in unison.
"It's okay, guys," Kate assured her sons and step-grandsons. "Why don't you get ready for bed? We'll be up soon."
The four boys quickly darted out of the room before any punishment could be thought up.
"We heard a noise," Alexis and Kevin entered the room. "What-oh. Are they hiding?"
"No," Kate laughed, "We sent them up to get ready for bed."
"At least Gram's Tony is still in one piece," Alexis remarked.
"That's what your father said," Kate began picking up the pieces of the broken vase.
"Why don't you guys go up and get some rest? We'll clean this up," Alexis suggested.
"That sounds like a good idea. Hey, Ryan, it's too late to take Sarah Grace to a hotel. Stay another night. We have plenty of room," Kate stated.
"Are you sure?" Kevin looked nervously towards Castle. He didn't want to make Alexis's father uncomfortable, hence the reason he suggested the hotel in the first place.
"It's okay, Kevin," Rick assured him.
"Okay," Kevin nodded.
"Come on, Castle, we should look in on the boys."
"Frisk Hunter. He's been taking his video game to bed lately."
"Boys and their video games," Kate snickered, "Will do. Nite, Alexis, nite, Kevin."
"Night," Kevin waved as he helped Alexis scoop up the pieces of vase.
"Night," Castle followed his wife.
Alexis took all the pieces and dumped them in the recycling bin. Then she joined Kevin back in the living room.
"You tired?" she asked.
"No, but you look exhausted," he ran his hands along her arms.
"Yeah, sleep's been a little elusive, even with the medication," Alexis admitted.
"Considering what you went through, I can imagine," he nodded.
Alexis laced their fingers together, "No screaming nightmares, but there are always a few moments of panic where I wake up and can't get back to sleep."
"How upset with me do you think Castle would be if we bunked together tonight?"
"I think if it helps me sleep, he'll get over it," Alexis smiled.
"Are you willing to risk his wrath?" he raised a brow.
"I can handle it."
"Okay," he nodded. "Let's go to sleep."
"Follow me," she lead him out of the room.
They walked upstairs, and Alexis went into the bathroom to change while Kevin changed into sweatpants from his weekender bag. When she hadn't emerged after ten minutes, Kevin poked his head in and found her staring in the mirror, her fingers brushing over the scars on her side.
Kevin brushed her fingers away so he could exam the scars for himself.
"Pretty hideous, aren't they?" she asked quietly.
"I don't think there could be anything hideous about you," he ran his fingers slowly along her skin.
"I think you're biased," Alexis said.
"Never claimed that I wasn't."
She turned around to face him, "I don't remember a lot of what happened, but I remember hearing you ordering me to stay with you."
"I'm glad you listened," he cupped her face, his finger tracing her lips softly.
"Yeah, me too. I don't think I've ever heard you sound that scared," Alexis recalled.
"I don't know that I've ever been that scared."
Alexis wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tightly, "I'm okay."
Kevin pressed his lips against her forehead and soaked in her warmth.
"You know that moment we're getting closer to," Alexis asked. "The one where I ask you to stay after we get home from a date?"
"Yeah," he nodded slightly.
"I think we're going to have to include the hot tub I have on my balcony when it happens," Alexis smiled.
" Why is that?" he chuckled softly.
"Because I like the idea of soaking in it with you."
"Then we should discuss when this date will be."
"Tomorrow, huh? You're looking a little tired," Alexis said before she tried to hide a yawn.
"So do you."
"Then let's go to bed," Alexis smiled.
Kevin pulled her back to the bedroom. Once she'd lain down, he curled in against her. "Sleep well, Lex."
"I love you, Kev," she slipped into sleep.
"I love you, Lex," he kissed her temple. He watched her sleep for several minutes before he was able to find sleep himself.