Dear readers, this chapter is a little longer than the others, but it just kept spilling out, and I couldn't find a stopping point... It's full of Bellamy angst, and I don't dislike the Character, I swear, He's actually my favorite. I love Bellamy, I'm twisted I guess, because I make him suffer so. But don't give up hope... He will have a happy Bellarkey ending...maybe, we have to wait and see :) thanks for the reviews..

Chapter 38- Darkness

Bellamy's fever raged, but he kept breathing. The fever worried Abby. She and Clarke took shifts keeping his body cooled. Roan watched and wanted to help but there was nothing he could do, So he stretched back down and fell back to sleep.

Finally Murphy walked over to Clarke. "Why don't you take a break, I'll do this a while," he said, as he took the towel from Clarke's hand. He had the look of sincerity on his face, like he wanted to stay busy.

Clarke glanced down at Bellamy, then again at Murphy. She smiled slightly, but the smile didn't reach her eyes. Nodding slightly, she glanced at Bellamy. "I'll get us some coffee," she said to Murphy. She walked out of the med bay and headed to the bar. Clarke rubbed her back. Her body ached, and she hated to leave Bellamy's side, but something told her Murphy wanted to help, so she let him.

As Murphy kept the cool cloth on Bellamy's head and neck, he thought back to the time in the drop ship when he killed Conner's by suffocating him with the wet towel, and then he suffocated Miles with the plastic bag. "Yea, lucky for you, that's not me anymore," he said to Bellamy. He thought of how angry he was, and how much he had changed. "This is a fucked up world now isn't it?" he asked Bellamy. He knew Bellamy couldn't hear him, but he felt like talking. "I never told you about the light house, did I? You would have loved it, a full bar, pool table, everything you would ever need. Maybe one day I'll show it to you," he said. "Yea, I'll take you and Monty. We'll make it a guy trip, we can bring back the liquor, set up bar and make a killing," he said.

Suddenly Murphy noticed blood began to drip form Bellamy's left ear. His body began to tremble again.

"No, no, no, Bellamy don't do this," Murphy said. He rushed to the door, and looked out, Clarke was coming up the corridor, "Clarke hurry," Murphy shouted. "He's seizing,"

Clarke dropped the coffees and ran into the room. She rushed to Bellamy's side. "I noticed blood coming from his ear, and then he started shaking," Murphy said.

Clarke looked at Bellamy then smiled slightly. "Why are you smiling, shouldn't I call Abby?' Murphy asked with concern.

"No Murphy, he isn't having a seizure. He's shaking because he's cold, his fever finally broke," she smiled.

"But what about the blood in his ear, that shit can't be good!" He said.

Clarke's face drew in seriously and looked at his ear. "No, but with the virus they gave him, I don't know what to expect, but the fever breaking is a sign in the right direction," she said.

Murphy breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank God, I thought he was dying again," he said with relief.

Clarke looked at him with surprise. "I never knew you cared Murphy," she said, "I'll make sure to let Bellamy know how moved you were," she said sarcastically.

"No, I don't care, I just knew if he did something stupid like kicked the bucket on my watch, everyone would blame me, and I'd never hear the end of it," he deadpanned. "I don't need that kind of shit right now."

Clarke shook her head at Murphy, and smiled, and then she walked to the wall shelf, grabbed a blanket and put it over Bellamy.

Murphy looked at Clarke as she gently stroked Bellamy's hair without realizing, "Well I'm going to go, get some shut eye," he said, "I think you have things under control," he said.

"Thank you John," said Clarke.

Murphy smiled a little at Clarke calling him John.

"No problem," he said. "Yea Bellamy's a dick, but I'm glad he's getting better," smiled John, and then he turned and left.

Clarke just smiled and shook her head as she turned towards Bellamy.

Bellamy's breathing became deeper, proving to Clarke he was finally beginning to defeat the Ice Nations attempt on his life. She was finally able to relax. Abby checked on him the next morning, only to find him sleeping and his fever normal. Clarke was asleep in the chair between him and Roan, who woke just as Abby entered the room. He sat up and slid off the bed.

"What are you doing?" Abby protested. "You need to lie back down, you almost died," she said

"I've laid around long enough," he said "I need to go back to my people, take care of some things," he said sternly. "Thank you for all you've done," he added. He looked at Bellamy and then back to Abby. "Your people care about him," he said.

"We care about all our people," Abby said.

Roan just nodded, and left.

Shortly after Roan left, things got back to normal in medical. Jackson came in and noticed Roans bed was empty and remade. "King Roans gone." He said and half smiled. "I can't say I'm not glad."

Miller suddenly rushed in with Harper following closely behind, "Abby," he said. "SShh" Abby shushed him then nodded towards Clarke and Bellamy, who were finally sleeping soundly. She guided them to the back bed, farther away. "I tried to tell him I'm fine," Harper said motioning to Miller, as she held onto her wrist.

Abby took her wrist into her hand, as Harper winced at the pain. "What happened?" Abby asked without looking up as she focused on Harpers wrist.

"I just twisted it," Harper said.

"She was trying to ride Apollo," Miller said. Harper gave him a frustrated look.

Abby tried to hide her smile. She looked up at Harper, "You know better than that," she said.

"I told her He only lets Bellamy ride him, but she wouldn't listen,' Miller smiled.

Monty rushed into medical, a frantic look on his face. "Harper," he said full of worry. "Bryan said you were hurt, are you okay?" he said as he looked her over, finally focusing on Abby as she examined her wrist. He then looked up at her face, his brows pulled in concern.

Harper smiled at him, "I'm fine," she reassured him.

"She tried to prove she could ride Apollo," said Miller sarcastically. "The horse didn't like it at all," he added.

Harper gave Miller a dirty look.

"What were you thinking?' Monty asked her.

Harper didn't answer.

"It's not broken, luckily, but it is a nasty sprain," Abby said. "Jackson, I need you to wrap her up," Abby told him when he came over, "It's going to hurt, but, you're off duty for now, and stay away from Apollo, that's an order," she told Harper.

"How's he doing?" Monty asked Abby, nodding towards Bellamy.

"I haven't had the chance to check him, but he's sleeping, and his fevers broken, so it's a good sign," she smiled. "I think he'll be fine, he just needs rest. Hopefully there are no lasting effects of the poison."

Monty went back to Harper as Jackson was finishing up with her wrist. Just as they were about to leave, Clarke woke. "Hey," she said groggily. Suddenly her attention was quickly on Bellamy, hoping he was still okay, and she was quickly relieved to see him sleeping soundly. She let out a breath she didn't realize she was holding, and then turned back to her friends. Looking at Harpers wrist she questioned what happened.

Miller laughed, "How about I fill you in over breakfast," he said.

She looked at Bellamy sleeping, and then at her three friends. She smiled, "Sure, I'm starving," she said as she turned to leave medical. "Mom, I'm going to get something to eat, let me know if he wakes up," she whispered to Abby.

Abby acknowledged with a nod, as Clarke, Miller, Monty and Harper all left together. She smiled, when she heard Miller laughing as he began to fill Clarke in on Harpers run in with Apollo. Abby was happy to finally hear laughter again.

Soon after Clarke and the others left, Marcus walked in. "I heard Roan left," he said to Abby. "How's Bellamy?"

Marcus looked down at him, just as he began to stir. "His fever finally broke," said Abby.

Bellamy brought his hand up to his temple, and squeezed his eyes, he moaned slightly, trying to wake and get his barring's. "Bellamy," said Abby as she and Marcus stood over him, "Bellamy, can you hear me?" she asked, "you're in the med bay, you're going to be okay," she said.

Bellamy slowly opened his eyes. They were still red. Abby and Marcus couldn't hide their look of concern. Suddenly, Bellamy began to breathe heavily, hyperventilating as fear took over. His eyes shot in every direction and his hands reached out, grabbing for anything.

Marcus and Abby reached and took his arms, "Bellamy, what is it?" Abby asked him.

"Calm down, you're okay," Marcus reassured him. Marcus glanced at Abby, questioning her, as if she could tell him what was wrong, while he held on to Bellamy's arms.

"I CAN"T SEE," cried Bellamy.

Marcus looked at Abby in horror.

"I can't see, help me," cried Bellamy. He pushed away the arms that held onto him. He pulled himself up and stood, stumbling blindly, arms splaying out as he tried to grasp onto his surroundings. His face was full of fear, and he knocked into a small table spilling everything onto the floor. The loud clanging as unknown metal objects hit the hard steel floor. Bellamy was panicked .

Marcus grabbed onto his shoulders, "Bellamy, it's Marcus, I'm right here," he said.

"I can't see, what's happening?" Bellamy cried, "Everything's dark, it's black, I can't breathe, I can't breathe," cried Bellamy. He clung to Marcus, as if the older man was his lifeline. "Help me, I can't breathe" he cried.

Marcus held him, as tears streamed down his face. Bellamy's cries of anguish were heartbreaking and Marcus felt helpless.

"It's going to be okay," Marcus tried to tell him. He glanced over to Abby, who had tears in her eyes.

"Bell?" said a familiar, shaky voice from the doorway. Octavia slowly walked into the room, her mouth drawn back, silently crying as she broke down from witnessing what was happening. She had heard as she came in, and couldn't hold back the fear she had for him. She rushed to his side and squeezed herself between Bellamy and Marcus, to take her big brother into her arms. Bellamy reached blindly, feeling her shoulders, and face. "I can't see O," he cried, "I can't see you." He fell to his knees, going onto all fours, his head hung down, and he sat sobbing. Octavia sat with him, holding onto him, "It's going to be okay, bell, we'll fix this," she cried.

Abby looked at Marcus. She shook her head, unsure what to do. Marcus took her upper arm, and pulled her away from the two Blake's, giving them space.

"Isn't there anything we can do?" he asked her in a whisper. "His eyes, I've never seen anything like that," he said about Bellamy's red eyes.

"I don't know," Abby said, "The poison, affected his head, Clarke mentioned a blood fever the grounders infected them with when they first landed, I think this was like that same thing, but it targeted only the head. Roan said it was almost always fatal, so at least he's alive." She said. "But I need to examine his eyes," she said.

"Let's give them some time," Marcus said, "Maybe Octavia can calm him down first, and I know he's scared."

"How are you?" Abby asked Marcus.

"I'm scared for him," the older man said. "This can't… how much more can he suffer through," he said, his voice cracking.

"Bellamy's strong, Marcus," Abby said. "He can handle more than we realize."

"There's always a breaking point Abby. This may be it," he said.

They both looked at the two Blake siblings across the room, holding on to each other as they both quietly shook from the heartbreak of Bellamy's blindness.

After a few minutes, Octavia pulled back and looked at Bellamy. She pulled deep into herself finding inner strength. "Bell, I need you to listen to me," she said clearly. He kept his head down. "Bellamy, look…"She stopped herself. "He can't look," she thought. "Bellamy, listen to me," she said again. She touched his jaw to raise his head, he jumped at her unexpected touch, and it broke her heart, but she softened her touch as Bellamy reached his hand up finding hers on his cheek. He raised his face looking blindly into the direction of her voice. Octavia suddenly gasped in horror, as she saw the red of his eyes. She regained her composure and calmly spoke.

Bellamy, I'm here, and I won't let anything bad happen to you, I promise," she said.

The familiar words, they had repeated to each other time and again, comforting and always full of love, they both understood meant everything. He needed to hear those words more than anything from her. "I'm scared, O" he said. "I am too, Bell," she said honestly. "But, I'm here now, and I'm never going to leave you." she said as tears streamed down her face, and she meant the words she said. She would never turn her back on him, ever again…