A/N: Alright. Second half and it's a mighty bit longer. I'm heading back to school tomorrow as I'm sure a lot of you are too and this semester is gonna be a hard one. I'm predicting maybe one more chapter and a long (or multipart) epilogue but it may take some time for me to get them out. Thank you so much for reading and thank you for my Beta, who edited this crazy long chapter for me and really helped boost my confidence in it.
Reviews inspire me to write faster :). Enjoy!
She hopes Maura doesn't want to talk anymore because she doesn't want to start a fight in front of Aaron and not because she's given up. All she wants is for Maura to look at her while she tells her there is nothing more she'd rather do than marry her and settle down with her. And now Maura chooses this time to be stubborn and give up so easily. It's not hard for her to realize that maybe Maura didn't mean to go so far in conveying her fears tonight and now she's scared for what Jane has to say. It kind of hurts her to know what little faith Maura has in her. And then again, it upsets her that she herself hadn't made it clear enough that Maura is it for her. Sure she wrote it in that letter months ago, but she could have just as easily said anything to get Maura back. Since then they haven't talked about the future at all and now she realizes it's a long awaited talk that needs to happen soon.
"You know we have a lot to talk about after dinner?" She asks to be sure that Maura knows their conversation isn't over.
She hears a faint "I know" from Maura and then watches as she fetches Aaron from the living room and helps him wash his hands before helping him sit down at the table.
It's a scene that despite the tension in the air, still warms Jane's heart. Because Maura with a child is one of Jane's favorite sides of her. And then she feels that gentle pang and realizes she can't wait till that's their child. She can't wait till Maura's taking such gentle care with their son and she wants to shout that to Maura. She wants to transfer that thought to Maura right now and let her feel that excited, butterfly feeling within her when she imagines it. But now isn't the time, so she resists.
The air between the three of them at the dinner table is a lot less tense than Jane expected it would be, but it's still a bit too quiet for her. She attempts conversation with Aaron and after a little prodding he opens up a little more. Even Maura smiles when he gets excited about baseball and he and Jane share a conversation about the Red Sox. For a six-year-old, he's well versed in the sport and it's another pang to the stomach. She wants their child to be just the same.
After dinner, she offers to clean up while Maura get's Aaron ready for bed and Maura thanks her with a quick but hesitant peck on the cheek before heading off will the boy. She hopes that's got to count for something as she wonders how to fix this mess while doing the dishes.
When she finishes she decides to see how Maura is doing with Aaron. She walks into the guest room to see Maura gently towel drying Aaron's freshly cleaned hair. She can't help but smile at the scene before her and she wishes again that the ironman pajama clad boy was theirs in that moment. As she watches Maura tuck him in she decides that if Maura is only getting hints of what she wants from her actions, she'll have to take action to show Maura that they're on the same page. She runs to their room and emerges minutes later just as Maura shuts the boy's door.
"Is he asleep?" She asks as she turns to face Maura.
"Yeah." Maura answers softly. "Hopefully he'll sleep through the night."
Now she's standing here like an idiot with no idea how to breach the subject so she immediately drops to one knee. Except what should have been a grand gesture just makes her feel like more of an idiot because she hasn't said anything.
"Jane?" She hears Maura question from above and it doesn't help her feel any less stupid.
"Just give me a minute." She asks as she tries to get her thoughts together and figure out what to say. She sees Maura looking at her expectantly and suddenly she's thirsty; her throat is so very dry. She clears her throat and just decides to wing it. "Maura." She stammers out and she's sure she's going to ruin everything but she's got to at least try.
"You're right about everything. Well almost everything. I'm a pain in the ass when it comes to talking about feelings and I haven't been doing a very good job at telling you what it is that I've been feeling. Maybe I'm better with actions so I'm going to take action. But I do want to get better at talking to you about these things." She promises and then takes a deep, calming breath.
"Today, I flat out panicked. Not because I didn't want the same things as you, but because I'm a coward Maur. When it comes to stuff like this, I'm not so great. It's no excuse though because I made you feel like we're on different pages and we aren't. I want everything you want, and not just because you want it. I want it too. Everything I said in the past, I said it because the only person I pictured marrying and having a family with was you. And I spent years thinking that it was never going to happen. I always thought we'd never be anything more than friends so I said those things to make myself feel better. Everything I wrote in that letter months ago was the truth. Maybe I don't say it enough. But I love you Maura. I love you so much and I want to marry you and I want to have kids with you and I want to grow old with you." She finishes strongly. She hopes she's said everything she needs to but she feels like she's forgetting something.
"Is that it?" Maura asks and Jane can't help but frown. She just bared everything and those are the only words Maura has to speak. "I'm just a little confused as to why you're on the floor. Though bowing is often used to express sincerity in Asian cultures this is hardly-"
"Crap." Jane interrupts her history lesson and then can't help but chuckle at her stupidity for forgetting the most important part of her speech but also at the reaction Maura has given her after everything she's just said. She wonders if that socially awkward part of Maura will ever go away but if she is being honest, she hopes it never does. "I'm so sorry. I wanted this to be special and then I ruined it by just trying to do it now and then I ruined it again by completely forgetting the point and I'm just going to start over." She babbles and then clears her throat one last time.
She reaches in her pocket and pulls out a small velvet box before continuing. "What I'm trying to say, is that you're it for me. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me and I'm sorry that I haven't been so good at making sure you know that. But I want to be yours and I want to make you as happy as you make me, for the rest of our lives." She says as she opens the box to reveal a ring with an oval cut yellow sapphire and three diamonds on each side of the gem in a platinum band. "Maura Dorthea Isles, will you marry me?" She asks with as much conviction as she can muster.
To her it seems weak, but it comes out strong and confident despite her true feelings and fears. Maura remains silent and she has no idea what to do or what she's thinking. Even after their small argument she doubts Maura and thinks she may say no and honestly that fear has been what held her back for the past month. And then she sees tears running down Maura's face and she panics as she jumps to her feet and attempts to wipe them away.
"I'm sorry, Maura." She repeats over and over as she wipes away Maura's tears and caresses her cheeks softly. "I didn't mean to make you cry. I'm sorry." Then she feels Maura's hands on hers and her head nods over and over. Maura's hands drop and she briefly feels them fist her shirt and pull her closer before Maura's kissing her, hard. It surprises her at first but then she gives in as their lips mold together perfectly as always. She hopes this means yes as she feels Maura grip her tighter and tighter.
"Yes, Jane." She finally pants between deep kisses.
"Yes?" Jane manages to breathe out despite Maura's attack on her lips. For some reason she can't believe it and she just has to make sure. She has to solidify that Maura Isles is now her fiancée.
"Absolutely." Maura mumbles against Jane's lips before pressing another bruising kiss to them.
How tightly Maura holds her is something Jane will never forget. It's kind of amazing how perfectly they meld together and how it seems as if every part of their bodies is touching. She pulls away from the kiss and rests her forehead against Maura's as she sighs a breath of relief. She fumbles a moment with the box in her hand before she remembers that she hasn't even placed the ring on Maura's finger.
She pulls back a bit and pulls Maura's left hand up to her mouth and kisses it. She's glad that it won't be empty any longer. She stares happily and proudly into Maura's eyes as she pulls the ring from the box and slides it gently onto Maura's ring finger. She spent hours and many lunch breaks looking for the perfect ring for Maura. Granted, she had to make up many stupid reasons as to why she couldn't spend lunch with her in the morgue as always but the look on Maura's face in this moment makes it worth it. She keeps her eyes locked on the green ones she loves so much as she sees them tear up again.
"It's beautiful, Jane." Maura whispers happily as she eyes the ring on her finger.
"Yeah?" She asks self-consciously. "Are you sure, because if you don't like it we could pick something else out. I wanted this to be perfect and romantic but then after tonight I just wanted to prove to you that I wanna marry you and now I just want to make sure you're at least happy with the ring so-"
"Jane." Maura interrupts her rambling. "It's perfect! I love it. I love you." She says earnestly.
Jane grins proudly as Maura pulls her in for another kiss. She isn't sure how but they make it to their bedroom which she's only aware of as her legs hit the bed behind her. Somehow they manage lying next to each other as Jane runs her arm up and down Maura's arm and hip, admiring her fiancée's (she's sure she won't get tired of being able to call Maura that) beauty.
"We should tell your mom first." Maura breaks the staring contest between them.
"She's going to know as soon as you walk in the door. She's had her eye on your ring finger since before Christmas." Jane hums contently as she herself admires Maura's ring finger.
"Should I ask?" Maura chuckles softly.
"It's a long story." Jane laughs along with her.
"We've got all the time in the world." Maura smiles.
"That we do." Jane agrees before going into the story of her mother and the ring. She feels it's safe to leave the other two rings out for now, especially Doyle's.
"Is that where you were all those times you couldn't have lunch with me?" Maura asks and receives a sheepish nod from the usually brazen detective. "Wow, so you've been contemplating asking for that long?" Maura wonders.
"I knew I wanted to marry you the first night you slept in my arms Maura." Jane admits truthfully earning that one smile Maura saves just for her.
"When do you want to get married?" Maura asks as she moves next to Jane and rests her head on her shoulder.
"Whenever you want babe." Jane answers, threading her fingers with Maura's and squeezing affectionately. "Though I think we should do without the 20-foot train, Maur." She suggests, earning a chuckle from the blonde.
"I was thinking of having a smaller ceremony than the dream wedding I told you about."
"Maura, we don't have to do that. We should have your dream wedding." Jane protests.
"Dreams change Jane. I want something small and private with our closest friends and family. As long as I'm marrying you, it's a dream wedding." She says reassuringly.
"Are you sure?" Jane questions.
"Extremely sure. I promise." She answers.
"Okay." Jane gives in. "If you change your mind, Maura." She trails off.
"I just want to marry you Jane." She answers while tightening her grip on the brunette.
They lay in silence for a while; the only sounds are those of their mixed, content breathing. She'd think Maura was asleep if she didn't feel her hand tickling her abdomen. When it stops she thinks Maura has fallen asleep and she's sure it won't be long before she follows. It was an exhausting day. However the next thing she knows, Maura's lips are upon her again.
It's unexpected and heated and it causes Jane's stomach to flip automatically, especially when Maura moves to straddle her waist and she feels a hand move under her shirt to palm her abdomen just below her breast. Maura being a top is such a turn on. Maura is a turn on and Jane is sure it's always going to be like that.
She hums when Maura's kiss turns softer and slower but it does nothing to cool her off. It does the opposite when Maura's thigh finds its way between her legs and she grinds right into her center.
"God, Maur." Jane groans and she feels Maura smirk as she starts trailing kisses down her jaw. She finds it adorable how happy it always makes Maura when she draws noises of pleasure from herself.
"I just remembered I've yet to make love to my fiancée." Maura whispers softly against Jane's jaw as she continues her trail of heated kisses.
Her breathing becomes labored as Maura continues rocking against her and she's pretty sure she's going to explode before Maura even really touches her. Just as Maura's hands reach her belt everything comes to a halt when they hear a familiar voice scream followed by Maura's name being called repeatedly in a panic.
Even Maura lets out a disappointed sigh at the interruption.
"Are you sure you want kids, Maur?" Jane half groans and half laughs. "Because once we have them, this is going to be an every night thing."
"I'm sorry." Maura says softly as she begins crawling off Jane.
"Hey." She says stopping Maura's retreat. She brushes her thumb softly over Maura's cheek and pecks her lips sweetly. "It was a joke. Don't be sorry."
"I'll be right back." Maura responds.
"Take your time, babe. I'm incredibly sexually frustrated right now, but he's more important." She says supportively.
"I love you." Maura beams while getting out of bed.
"I love you too." Jane mimics. "Take care of your boy."
It's only half an hour before Maura returns, having finally got Aaron to go back to sleep. However, she's not surprised to find Jane passed out on the bed, still dressed in everything including her shoes. They hadn't even made it to losing clothes before they were interrupted and she's kind of sad that Jane has fallen asleep waiting for her to return but it was an extremely long day and she's exhausted too. She sighs softly as she moves to remove Jane's shoes and socks and then crawls in next to her in bed.
She takes a moment to admire the sleeping brunette, her face for once relaxed and free of any signs of stress. She leans over and kisses her forehead softly and slowly before curling into her. She admires her engagement ring one final time just to assure herself that tonight truly happened. She wraps her arm around Jane's torso sighing in contentment and bliss before falling asleep.
Jane wakes minutes before their alarm is usually set to go off and she's glad she was so lucky as she turns it off for the morning to let Maura sleep in. She doesn't know how long it took her to get Aaron back to sleep but she's sure extra sleep would be appreciated. She decides to make breakfast remembering that kids have got to eat and it's the most important meal of the day.
She's setting the last pancake on the plate when little footsteps cause her to turn around. The kid's got good timing. She thinks as she walks over to him. "Good morning, Aaron." She greets him softly as he rubs his tired eyes. It's another one of those surreal moments, watching the boy in his ironman pajamas. It's another moment she hopes is a representation of her future. "Would you like some breakfast?"
"Yes, please." He says audibly and Jane smiles, happy that he's finally comfortable enough to speak to her. She helps him take a seat and serves him a plate of food.
"Would you like some orange juice?" She asks as she heads to the fridge to pour him a glass after hearing another faint "yes." She sets the glass down in front of him and tousles his hair gently before positioning herself in front of Maura's espresso machine. She hopes she paid enough attention to be able to work Maura's contraption so she can wake her up with non-instant coffee.
"Where is Maura?" She hears faintly from behind her.
"She's still asleep, honey." She answers as she tries to finish Maura's drink. "I'm going to go wake her now, okay? You eat." She says as she heads off towards her bedroom with coffee in hand.
She walks in to see Maura still asleep and places the coffee on the nightstand. She bends down and brushes wisps of honey blonde hair from Maura's face before kissing her on the forehead and whispering gentle words to wake her.
"Jane?" Maura moans.
"Yeah, baby. Come on I made some breakfast." She answers with another kiss to Maura's forehead before she pulls back and is met with sleepy green eyes. "Hi." She smiles down at her.
"Good morning." Maura says returning her smile. She leans in to kiss Maura on the lips but she turns at the last minute.
"Morning breath." Maura answers upon seeing Jane's frown.
"I don't care, babe." Jane says before pulling her face towards hers to plant a kiss on Maura's lips. "I made you coffee. Aaron's already eating. Come join us." She says before kissing Maura once more and heading back out to the kitchen.
She notices Aaron has still not started eating. "What's wrong buddy?" She asks as she makes a plate for her and Maura. She frowns when she notices he still sits there motionless. "Maura's going to be in here in a few seconds. It's okay to eat without her, I promise."
"My mom says I shouldn't eat until everyone is at the table." He mumbles quietly.
"Well. You're mother is very right, but this morning we are going to let that slide okay? I promise you won't get in trouble. Maura's going to be a bit so you may eat without her." She says as she nurses a cup of coffee in her hands.
He stares at her skeptically but decides to obey when she says "I promise" again.
Moments later Maura emerges beaming with her cup of coffee. "Jane this is perfect." She exclaims motioning towards the cup in her hands.
"Well I am marrying you." Jane shrugs. "I'd hope I at least know how you like your coffee." She says as she leads Maura to sit. She goes into the kitchen to grab their plates, listening to her speak softly to Aaron.
She places her plate down and then Maura's.
"I didn't know you paid attention." Maura continues their conversation.
"I pay more attention than I let on." She answers with a peck to Maura's cheek before sitting down.
"It looks great, Jane. What did I do to deserve this treatment?" She chuckles as she begins to eat her meal.
"I've got to keep appearances up." She laughs. "You know, just until we're married and I've officially bagged myself a rich doctor." She jokes.
"Mhm." Maura hums. "And what makes you think I'll still marry you now that I know your plan?"
"Oh no! Foiled." Jane fake gasps, winking at a now grinning Aaron.
"How are you doing, honey?" Maura asks Aaron who had been silent since greeting Maura.
"I'm okay." He answers as he finishes up his meal.
"Did you have any more nightmares?" Maura worries.
"No." He responds. "Thank you for singing to me last night."
"You're very welcome. If you want to sleep more you can take a nap later." She tells him while Jane just stares at her. She's never heard Maura sing and yet she sang Aaron to sleep last night. She kind of wishes she hadn't been left so sexually frustrated so she could have joined her and witnessed it.
"May I be excused?" He asks politely once he is done with his food.
"Yes you may." Maura tells him. "Would you like me to turn on some cartoons for you to watch?"
"Yes please."
It's weird how Jane can't take her eyes off Maura whenever she's interacting with Aaron. Every time she sees Maura and how good she is with him and how warm and maternal she is, she just can't wait to see it every day. She can't wait till Maura is the mother of their children. And it kind of scares her but it also excites her, how badly she wants this. How badly and how soon she wants to expand her family with Maura. It's alarming how much her mind has changed since yesterday afternoon.
"Is everything okay?" Maura asks breaking her from her thoughts.
"Hmmm. Yeah." She answers once she recollects herself and notices Aaron is poised in front of the television.
"Are you done?" Maura questions looking down at Jane's plate.
"Yeah." She says just as Maura grabs hers and goes for the other two on the table.
"Maur, I got it." She goes to protest but Maura continues to take them towards the kitchen.
"You cooked." She insists and Jane gives in. She leans against the counter and watches the boy in the living room and the cartoon he is watching.
"He's very polite." Jane notes about the boy.
"He is. His parents made sure he knew his manners." Maura sighs.
"He didn't want to eat this morning until everyone was at the table." Jane informs her. "He said his mother told him it was impolite."
"He's a very good kid."
"It just pisses me off. He had good parents. Kathy was obviously a better mother than Janice would ever be. And now he has to grow up without them." Jane seethes, her jaw clenching.
"Jane, I know you'll bring justice to those who deserve it." Maura eases, placing a comforting hand on Jane's.
She gives Maura a small smile before she retreats back to the dishes. "It just sucks that his childhood has just been ripped from under him." She says glumly as she goes back to studying the television. "I remember Saturday cartoons with my brothers." Jane reminisces. "They've changed a lot."
"I never really watched much TV when I was a child." Maura remembers sadly. "The only television we had in the house was in my nanny's room. Sometimes she'd disobey my mother and let me watch. Otherwise, my entertainment was found through reading."
Jane moves closer to Maura and wraps her arms around her waist while she washes. "And it's why you're the most intelligent, amazing woman I know, Maura Isles."
"Still." Maura sighs. "I missed out on a lot of aspects of a normal childhood."
Jane frowns at that. "What are the chances he'll have a normal childhood again?"
"He's going to need lots of help, Jane." She whispers. "Lots of special care and probably a few psychologists, a grief counselor. I guess the biggest fear right now with him is PTSD. He shows signs of withdrawal. But studies also find that the loss of a parent in childhood may have drastic effects in adulthood. Statistics show risk of anxiety and substance abuse problems later in life. The largest hope he has is that Lisa will be a good substitute parent and will be able to help him heal."
"And if it's not enough?" Jane worries.
"I don't know, Jane" She answers sadly. Jane tightens her hold on her a bit and they revel in each other for a moment trying to find comfort from the other.
"You should stay home with Aaron today." Jane says, breaking their sad silence.
"No, Jane." She protests. "I want to come in. Maybe I can go over the evidence again and find something."
"Maur, he needs you. And Lisa is going to need your help with him. I think you should write out what she needs to know and see if you can find a good psychologist for her in New York. Just get everything prepared. Please, for Aaron's sake." She pleads.
"Okay." She gives in.
"Okay?"
"Yes."
"Good." Jane gives her a brief kiss before releasing her. "I'll call you when Lisa gets in. Hopefully everything will be wrapped up tight by then." She turns to get ready for work but stops and turns back to Maura. "I love you." She says turning and leaving only when Maura returns it.
Jane's sitting in the interrogation room with Frost and Julia at her side, Janice sitting cross-armed across from them.
"You can't keep me here forever and you certainly can't keep my son from me." She snarls.
"No but you can bet that if you had anything to do with the death of his parents-"
"Parent!" She bites. "That bitch wasn't his mother."
"I'm sensing a lot of hostility. Certainly sounds like motive to me." Frost notes.
"I told you I was working." She protests.
"Oh yes. At the diner on 13th right?" Frost asks for confirmation.
"Yes." She growls.
"Hmm. You see the man we have in custody right now liked to eat there often." Jane says, pulling a picture and placing it in front of the angry brunette.
"If you've got someone in custody then why are you holding me and keeping me from my son." She demands angrily, not even sparing a glance at the photo.
"Just a few follow-up questions to get our facts straight." Jane explains. "Do you know this man?"
She glances down and back up seconds later. "Nope. Can I go now?"
"You've never waited on him? Because, your co-workers say otherwise." Frost adds.
"I wait on tons of people, why would I remember some creep." She bites.
"Well the women you work with said he comes in often, only when you're working, and always asks for you. I doubt he'd be easy to forget." Jane baits.
"Like I said, the guy's a creep." Janice fumes.
"That "creep" killed Aaron's parents with no motive whatsoever. Now, I don't believe in coincidence, so do you want to try again?" Jane demands.
"So maybe on some bad days I complained about my asshole ex who wouldn't let me see my kid. He was just some creep and he's obviously obsessive. Maybe he decided to try to win my favor. That's not my fault. I didn't know he was crazy." She tries to explain away the correlation.
"So you just happened to spill specifics so that this man could find the Douglas's house and kill them?" She asks unconvinced.
"Maybe." She hisses. "I see what you're doing and it's not going to work. I didn't do anything and if I'm not under arrest you can't hold me."
"You're right, we can't." Jane confirms. "You're free to go…for now."
She promptly stomps out and Jane grins clicking off the recording device she was hiding. "What do you say we bring Perkins back in. We might have got enough to convince him to turn on her."
"Mr. Perkins your story doesn't hold up. There is no motive but the evidence doesn't lie and it's insurmountable." Julia informs the still silent man. They've been trying to convince him for the past twenty minutes.
"If my guilt is so obvious then why am I here?" He mumbles solemnly.
"I could cut you a deal if you tell us the truth. The jury isn't going to be sympathetic especially when they hear of the little boy you've left orphaned." She pushes.
"I told you I don't know why I did it." He sighs not changing his story.
"So it had nothing to do with the relationship you had with Janice Royce?" Jane asks hoping she's steering this is the right direction.
He gulps and wrings his hands under the table and Jane doesn't need Maura to tell her he's nervous and preparing to lie.
"I don't know who that is." He says almost like a drone programmed to say these things.
"Mr. Perkins, if you give us information on her we can reduce your sentence." Julia tries to get him to give up info.
"She didn't do anything." He murmurs and Jane sees his façade cracking.
"So you know her?" Jane asks.
"Yes. No. She works at the diner down the street. I see her from time to time."
"Mr. Perkins. Daniel." Jane tries. "I know it's more than that. You love her but you can't throw your life away for her, especially if she doesn't feel the same way."
"She does." He argues and Jane knows she's got him as she presses play on the tape at the moment she paused it at for this moment.
So maybe on some bad days I complained about my asshole ex who wouldn't let me see my kid. He was just some creep and he's obviously obsessive. Maybe he decided to try to win my favor. That's not my fault. I didn't know he was crazy.
"She didn't say that." He protests.
"She did." Frost insists. "She used you Daniel. Are you going to let her get away with it? With lying to you so you'd do her dirty work?"
He's crying now and Jane finds it a little sad that he was so devoted that he'd throw his life away to give her what she wanted.
Julia places a hand on his. "Let us help you." She says comfortingly and it's all it takes for him to break.
Thirty minutes later and his confession and plea deal is signed and dated and Frost and Frankie should be back any minute with Janice in tow again.
They're heading out the interrogation room, Perkins in cuffs, when they pass the now entering Janice.
"You idiot." She growls at Daniel. "You had one damn job."
"You never loved me. You used me." He says remorsefully.
"Of course I couldn't love you. You couldn't even keep your mouth shut." She yells as he retreats, head down.
"Was it worth it?" Jane asks. "Ruining your son's childhood? Taking away his family? And for what? Absolutely nothing."
Janice responds only by baring her teeth as Frost pulls her off. Jane sighs and heads off to write up the paperwork for the case. A case closed but still sad nonetheless. Nobody wins and one woman manages to screw up the lives of multiple people.
She calls Andrea and informs her of the situation and promises to notify her when Lisa arrives so they can all meet and she can give her the details of what will need to be done regarding Aaron's custody.
She's crossing her T's and dotting her I's on her report when she's paged downstairs. She calls Andrea again, and texts Maura to warn her that her and Lisa should be around soon and heads down to meet the woman.
When she steps into the lobby she's greeted by a gorgeous red head with blue eyes. She's surprised by how young the woman is. It's obvious she's the younger of the siblings. "You must be Lisa." She greets, extending a hand for her to shake.
"Yes, and you're Detective Isles?" She greets her nervously.
"Detective Rizzoli." She corrects. "Dr. Isles is my partner and the M.E. You can call me Jane."
"Forgive me, my head is just a little jumbled." She apologizes.
"You're anxious?" Jane wonders earning a timid nod from the woman. "You'll be fine. Aaron is a wonderful boy."
"I'm sure he is." She says truthfully.
"Well we should go meet him. I'd be happy to drive." Jane asks, leading the woman out.
When they arrive Jane's aware of an unknown vehicle and she's sure it belongs to Andrea.
"What's this?" Jane wonders as she walks in, with Lisa following, to find the three of them playing a board game in the dining room.
"Your mom stopped by with a few things to help keep Aaron occupied today and Andrea got here and decided to join in on a little fun." Maura explains. She stands to lead them away to talk.
"You must be Lisa, I'm Maura." She greets her once they are out of Aaron's ear shot.
"Nice to meet you." She says, her eyes glancing between Maura and the table where her nephew sits.
"Board games can provide an easy way for family bonding. A sense of boding provides a child with comfort and helps relieve them of stress." She rambles upon shaking the redhead's hand.
"Maura is a doctor and she's got a lot of advice for you when it comes to making sure Aaron is happy and healthy." Jane excuses Maura's awkward googlemouth.
"He's gotten so big." Lisa notes upon looking at him.
"How long has it been since you've seen him?" Jane asks.
"At least two years." She says sadly. "Tim and I had a disagreement. We never got to reconcile. We never got to fix everything." She cries.
"You can." Maura eases her. "By looking after his son and making sure he grows up to make his parents proud."
"What if I can't be enough for him?" She worries.
"He's a wonderful boy. He's well mannered and smart. He needs guidance and love and you can easily give that to him." Maura insists.
"You're married?" Jane asks noting the rings on her left hand.
"Yes, I just married."
"Then you can already offer him a family. That's what he needs most of all. Jane and I can help in any way you need. You won't be the only one in this." Maura promises.
"You and your husband can do way better than any foster home." Jane adds.
"Wife." Lisa corrects. "That's what Tim and I fought about. He didn't approve of my lifestyle and he wouldn't approve of us raising his son."
"Don't let your brother's mistake and close-mindedness affect your decision about Aaron. He needs a family and he doesn't judge." Maura presses.
"He probably doesn't even recognize me." She says sadly.
"There is only one way to find out." Jane reasons.
Lisa nods and bites her lip but gives in when Maura takes her hand and helps her towards Aaron.
She kneels in front of the boy and has no idea what to do or say. She settles with a simple "Hi."
"Hi." He mimics shyly.
"Do you know who I am?" She asks softly.
"Aunt Lisa." He declares and she can't help the smile the breaks out.
"That's right." She exclaims. "You remember me?"
He smiles and nods and the tension in the room drops immediately.
"How about you all stay for dinner and we can all talk and get to know each other a bit, especially you and Aaron." Maura suggests heading towards the kitchen.
Jane follows and finds her pulling out lasagna from the oven. "You cooked?"
"I did." She affirms.
"Just for this occasion." She smiles. "Maura you're a lot better with live people and emotions than you'll ever allow yourself to realize." She compliments while grabbing place settings for their guests.
They've talked for hours and Maura cannot be surer that Lisa will do a wonderful job with Aaron. They're standing in the foyer saying goodbye and Jane can see Maura is holding back tears, especially when Aaron says goodbye to them and asks if he'll see Maura again.
Maura kneels in front of him and after Lisa nods at her she says "Anytime you want you can call me on the phone and if Aunt Lisa doesn't mind we'll come visit you." She looks to Lisa before adding "or if you'd like, our home is open for you all to visit anytime." She finishes while motioning between Jane and herself.
Jane's pretty sure it's the first time it dawns on Lisa that they're together and she sees the changes in her face as she puts it together. It's a good change as she realizes she's in the home of a wonderful couple who truly understands her and is on her side. "I'd love that and really, thank you both for everything." She responds and smiles as Aaron hugs Maura tightly.
"Promise you'll call either of us if you ever need anything." Maura asks, rising to her feet after releasing the boy. "I've written out everything I've already told you about caring for him, I've written down contact info for one of the best counselors in New York and I've also given you both of our numbers."
"Maura thank you. You've done so much. We'll do our best."
"You guys will be great." Maura promises.
"Bye little buddy. It was fun having you around." Jane says as she tousles the boy's hair. She gives in and hugs him when he puts two arms up in demand. She hugs him tightly, secretly sad to see him go.
"You guys have done such a great job, you should consider fostering." Andrea chimes in.
Jane looks at Maura briefly and then speaks. "I don't think those cards are on the table right now."
"Think about it." She presses before reaching for the door. "We've got a bit more to discuss." She says to Lisa as she follows them out.
Maura closes the door and sighs as she leans her back against it.
The shuddering breath she hears come from Maura hurts Jane as much as she's sure Aaron's absence does to her. She does the only thing instincts tells her to do and wraps Maura in a tight embrace. "I love you." She whispers into Maura's hair and tightens her hold as Maura sniffles.
She pulls them to the couch and Maura curls into Jane's side, her head tucked into Jane's collar. She holds Maura tightly, her arm wrapped around her waist to keep her together as she sniffles lightly on her shoulder. She didn't expect it to affect Maura this much. She says the only words she can think of right now.
"Soon." She whispers as she kisses Maura's forehead lightly. "Soon, Maura." It works as Maura's sniffles die down and she nuzzles into Jane's neck.
"Are you sure?" Maura murmurs lightly and it's another thing that kind of hurts Jane. Maura's questioning of whether it's what she really wants.
"As soon as we're married." She answers and silence falls on them. She decides that now's a time to open up like she promised and prove to Maura that she's telling to truth.
"When we have kids, I want them to be just like you." Jane starts, ending the silence. "Smart and pensive; warm and witty, talented and charismatic; beautiful and loving and polite and so, so gentle. I want them to have your green eyes, and your beautiful honey blonde hair; your brain and most importantly, your perfect smile that lights up the room and my life. I want you to teach them all the languages you know and teach them how to be as proper as you and I want them to be filled with all the knowledge you can give them."
"Jane." Maura sniffles, tears returning to her eyes. "I want them to be strong like you. I want them to be brave and loyal and keen and sarcastic. I want them to have your dark curls and your magnificent bone structure. I want them to be just like you. I want them to know everything there is to know about baseball and the red sox and I want them to enjoy themselves just like you do. I want you to give them the knowledge of what it's like to be a child even when they should act grown up. I don't ever want them to grow up." She argues.
"Maura I don't want them to be like me. I want a bunch of little yous running around. You've got the better genes."
Maura lifts her head to stare Jane in the eye determined to change her mind. "No Jane, you and your genes are perfect and I want a little you. I want our own little Rizzoli." She protests. When Jane tries to argue she kisses her. "Don't argue with me. We'll have one of each." Biting her lip, hoping she hasn't asked for too much.
"At least one of each." Jane adds slipping her hand under Maura's shirt to palm her abdomen. Maura kisses her softly and sweetly and threads her fingers with hers on her stomach, swelling with joy at what Jane's agreeing to.
"At least one of each." She repeats. It's quiet for a moment before she speaks again. "I think we should get married in the beginning of July."
"So soon?" Jane asks. "That's hardly enough time to plan a dream wedding, Maur."
"I told you I want a small wedding, Jane. All that matters is that you're there to say I do." She insists.
"You're sure?"
"I just want to be Mrs. Maura Rizzoli, we're not getting any younger." She says lightly.
"Rizzoli? You want to take my last name?" She questions.
"Isn't that usually how it works?"
"I just figured you'd want to hyphenate, like Isles-Rizzoli or Rizzoli-Isles." She clarifies.
"I've felt like a Rizzoli since I first attended a Rizzoli Sunday dinner. I'd like to take your last name." She explains. "As long as that's okay with you."
"That's more than okay with me."
"I'll still go by Dr. Isles, though. Just so it's not confusing." She adds.
"I wouldn't have it any other way." Jane sighs happily.
"Good." Maura says before pressing her lips to Jane's. "Now that that's settled, can I finally make love to my beautiful fiancée?"
"God, Maur, I thought you'd never ask." Jane gasps, pulling the blonde down on top of her, sighing contently as their hips fit together like a puzzle.
The perfect fit.