A/N The Buy More scenes were good fun, so I left them alone.

"He challenged me to a duel."

"All's fair in…in…"

"I wish I had a friend like Morgan."

"I'll prove it to you."

In a black van…

"She's not answering her cell," said Casey.

"No landline connection, either," said Chuck. "She's on her own."

Grunt. "Fortunately she has an awful lot of 'her own' to be on."

"Assuming she hasn't been captured already," said Shaw.

"We saw this coming a mile away, Shaw," said Chuck. "Or at least Sarah and I did. She won't be blind-sided by anyone."

In the Buy More…

Sarah stumbled after Morgan, unprepared for the strength of his determination. She pulled back, dragging him to a halt. "Morgan, wait. If there really is a CIA base below us, then they're CIA-level bad guys. We work retail. We need to call the police."

Morgan gave her a cunning look. "Don't think I don't know what you're doing, Sarah Walker," he said. "You're trying to make me back down. But there really is a base down there and I was really in it, so I say, absolutely, call the police."

That was easy. Sarah pulled out her phone. "I have no signal."

"Ah-hah," said Morgan. "Cut communications, bad guy 101. So you see, there's only us."

"And a store full of your coworkers."

"You would bring Jeff and Lester in on this?" asked Morgan. "That's like sending Squirrel Girl out to defeat Thanos."

"Squirrel Girl did defeat Thanos," said Sarah. Good God, was she actually defending those two?

"Yes, but no one in their right minds would send her to do it," said Morgan. "The smart play is to get everyone else out of here, now. You and I are America's last line of defense, and America begins with them."

"It does?" said Sarah. No wonder Fulcrum wanted to take over. "Fine, you and me."

Morgan offered her his fist to bump, which she reluctantly did. "Let's do this."

Five minutes later…

"Well, that could have gone better," said Sarah. A Buymorian revolution, for God's sake. She'd stopped revolutions with a fork, in the past. Somehow she sensed that that wouldn't work here.

"Yeah," said Morgan. "But look at the bright side, at least they're all facing the wrong way."

"True," said Sarah. A small mercy. "Wait. The wrong way for what?"

"For me to gear up, of course," said Morgan.

"What about me?"

Morgan just gestured at the whole long length of her. "They'll ignore me, they're used to it," he said. "Wait here." He slipped around the corner into the store itself.

Sarah took her phone out, trying to call her team. Still no connection, but her emergency beacon should be able to punch through anything, so she pressed it, knowing Chuck would understand. She heard Morgan coming up behind her, trying to be stealthy.

"Here," he said, and she jumped, like a yogurt-seller would. "Some Mace. Emmet had a stockpile. And a walkie-talkie, don't lose that. I'm not sure how much of the rest of this stuff you can use."

Looking at the collection of kitchenware and other assorted junk he'd draped himself with, she couldn't help but agree. Chuck made better weapons out of hairspray. "Maybe we should rethink this."

"I'd love to," said Morgan. "I'd love to let someone else do this, but Big Mike is leading his own revolution and Chuck's not here. So all I can do is ask myself, what would Chuck do, and try to do that."

Sarah smiled. "You could have worse role models." She held out a fist, and he bumped it. "Let's do this."

Five minutes later…

Morgan and Sarah sat back to back on the floor of the dojo in Castle, hands cuffed uncomfortably behind them. "Well, that could have gone better," said Morgan.

Sarah didn't agree. They were inside, after all, which she couldn't have done on her own, even if she'd wanted to give the game away to her partner, which she didn't. "You did great," she said, glad that the head bad guy was stropping his razor in front of her and not Morgan.

"You're all alone, agent," said the leader. "We've got your whole base locked down."

"Who's an agent?" asked Morgan. "He thinks we're spies."

"That's ridiculous," said Sarah, sounding afraid. "We work retail. I sell yogurt."

"Exactly right," said Morgan. "So you can just let us go and keep doing whatever it is you're doing. We really won't wow that's a sharp-looking razor."

Leader knelt down in front of Sarah, razor in hand. "We've scanned the entire base, looking for what we want, but we haven't found it." He waved the razor casually. "I really hope you know where it is, otherwise this could get…unpleasant."

"What's unpleasant is your breath," said Sarah. "I've got a guacamole and Greek feta combo at the store, should clear that right up."

"Now I know that you're an agent," said leader, with a smarmy grin. "Only someone who'd been through the CIA's torture school could come up with something so heinous. Thanks for the idea." He stood up, and moved around to kneel in front of Morgan, brandishing his razor. "Clearly, no amount of damage I could inflict with this little tool will break that kind of spirit, so I'll just have to torture you instead."

"Why me?" said Morgan, staring cross-eyed at the approaching blade.

"Because you made the mistake of telling me that you were the best friend of Charles–"

"He's not Chuck's best friend," snapped Sarah. "I am."

"Don't listen to her," said Morgan quickly. "I'm the one you want to torture, not her."

Sarah dug an elbow into his back. "Morgan, what are you doing?"

Morgan ignored her. "I've known Chuck my entire life. He's my best friend, my brother, since we were 6 years old," he said. Then he gulped. "And I'm protecting his heart, because that's what best friends do."

"That's what I'm trying to do," said Sarah.

Leader pressed his blade against Morgan's face. "Then you'd better start talking, agent."

"We're best friends, not spies," said Morgan.

"Then I don't need either one of you," said Leader. "But since you've known him the longest, Mr. Grimes, you'll go first."

Morgan felt Sarah take a deep breath, and say, "I am–"

"Shut up Sarah," he yelled. "I am–"

"–a member…of a joint NSA-CIA black ops team, stationed here in Burbank–"

"Okay, I'm not one of those," said Morgan, as the blade lifted away from his face.

"I have a level 6 clearance, and my code name…is Sarah Walker." Sarah cleared her throat. "I'm sorry, Morgan, but I'm a spy."

In the Orange Orange…

"Anything?" said Shaw, coming out of the freezer unit.

"No," said Chuck, typing on the register's keyboard. "They've locked us out, overridden our security access. I'm trying to hack my way in, while Casey goes to the source."

In Castle…

"You're a spy?" said Morgan, in a small voice.

"To quote our mutual friend," said Sarah, "Don't freak out."

"You two can kiss and make up later," said Leader. "After you give me what I came for and before I kill you both, quickly and cleanly."

"It would help if you told me what it was you wanted," said Sarah. "It-it-it-it, just tell me what it is."

Leader left Morgan and came back around to Sarah. "Sydney Prince's phone. It was listed as recovered, but our moles in the CIA haven't found it. All of her data, her marks, her leverage. It has to be here, and I want it."

Sarah remembered the phone they had, the one that Shaw had handed over. "It was broken," she said, "Useless. We sent it in for hardware analysis and disposal."

"We have that one," said Leader, waving it away with his razor. "It wasn't hers."

Sarah's face didn't change. "Sorry. Can't help you."

Leader raised his razor. "That's makes two of us."

An underling came into the room. "We have visitors. Casey and Carmichael."

Morgan perked up. "Casey's a spy too?"

Leader smiled, folding his knife. "Well, it looks like we'll have to save the torture for later, after I've taken care of your friends. Your best friends."

"Casey's not my friend," said Morgan.

"Morgan–" said Sarah.

Leader clamped a hand over her mouth. "I'm not talking about Casey," he said, past her and through her, for Morgan's delectation. "I'm talking about Carmichael. Charles Carmichael, or as you know him, Charles Irving Bartowski." He released his hold on Sarah's face. "You never told him that part, did you? Have fun catching up." He walked away, leaving them to stew.

"Morgan?" said Sarah.

"Chuck's a spy?" said Morgan.

"Yes, Chuck's a spy," said Sarah sadly. "He didn't want to be, didn't ask to be. Didn't want to lie to you, or to Ellie, but he had to, to protect–"

"You're a spy too?"

"Yes."

"Were you ever his friend?"

She gusted out a laugh. "The situation we're in, and that's what you care about?"

"Why not?" he said. "Everything else makes perfect sense. The lying, the vanishing into thin air–hey, you guys must have an entrance in HT, don't you?"

"You're taking this well."

"Are you kidding, I thought I was losing him. This is the best news ever, well, except for you two. Were you ever really together with Chuck?"

"Not in the beginning," said Sarah. "I was sent here to investigate a theft of CIA property, and it looked like Chuck was involved."

"He wasn't," said Morgan, with utter certainty.

"No, he wasn't, but he got it, and he couldn't give it back, so he had to come work with us. Since then, I have been, at various times, his handler, his protector, his supervisor, his partner, and the guardian of his heart." Sarah paused for a moment. "But I'm not his best friend. That's you and always has been."

"So who's Sam?" No answer. "Come on, we're probably gonna die, this is no time for secrets."

"It's not a secret," said Sarah. "Not anymore." Chuck knows all about her. "I am Sam…"

In the Buy More break room…

Casey put his fingers on the sensor, but of course the lock didn't disengage. He got out his code-breaker, the same one he used at the hotel. The security in Castle was higher grade, but the principle was the same.

The door opened, faster than usual with two goons on the inside pushing it. He hit the table, dropping his device, but he had no time to look for it. They were here to kill him, there could be no other reason, but they weren't good fighters. Still, two on one was hard to beat. He threw himself against the lockers repeatedly, trying to dislodge the one on his back while the one in front took advantage. Doors popped open and small objects fell underfoot. A bottle fell and broke, releasing a foul chemical stench, ether or chloroform. Casey kicked the front guy in the nuts and he fell, and Casey stepped on his head to hold him down in the puddle until he passed out. One on one the second guy had no chance.

Casey reeled away from the puddle, head spinning, and his foot kicked a small package. He picked it up and threw it back in his locker. He tried the door again but it was closed, his device stepped on and the room full of fumes. He left the goons where they were and headed back to the Double O, defeated by Jeff.

In the Double O…

"We have to use the self-destruct," said Shaw. "All my intelligence on the Ring is down there."

"So is Sarah," said Chuck, still typing.

"We don't know that."

"The only reason she's not here is because she's there," said Chuck. "She knows her duty."

"Her duty includes being ready to die for the greater good," said Shaw.

"That's true, but if they already transmitted your intel, it's too late," said Chuck. "If they haven't I can stop them easily. Either way the greater good is not served by destroying an entire CIA base and the shopping center above it."

Down in Castle…

"…And there you have it," said Sarah. "The story of my life."

"It doesn't sound like much of a life," said Morgan sadly. "Just a…bunch of petty adventures held together by string. That must be where Chuck comes in."

"That obvious, huh?"

"You do sort of light up when he comes into the room," said Morgan.

Leader came into the room. "Kill them, dump the bodies."

Morgan felt Sarah clasp his hands. "So long Sarah," he said. "Good knowing you." Wait, she left something…

"Don't worry, Morgan," said Sarah, as they pulled her to her feet. "I should have known you cretins weren't real agents."

"And how is that?"

"Because you didn't search me for a key, idiot." Sarah punched him in the face, and he went down.

Morgan fell to one side as the goons pushed him out of their way, and kept rolling. Lodged against the wall he fumbled with the key Sarah had shoved into his hand. When he got a hand free he reached for a weapon, a wooden staff or something, but only managed to knock it sideways. A goon stepped on it and skidded forward into a vicious kick, and that was one down.

Morgan slammed his hand down on the end of the staff and it popped up into the air, where Sarah caught it. "Thanks, Morgan," she said, fending off an attack by the remaining bad guy. She planted the bo and launched herself at him, double-kicking him into the wall, and that was two down.

Something slashed at the staff and Sarah fell into a crouch. Leader had recovered, and he held a katana. Sarah readied herself for his attack, watching for the beginning of his swing. There! She swung the staff as he came in…

…and stopped, his foot not moving. He looked down. Morgan, lying next to him, waved, and that was the last thing he saw.

Sarah looked at her fallen target, his foot cuffed to a display table. She poked him with her staff, but he didn't move. She smiled at Morgan. "That'll teach him to mess with a best friend."

In the Double-O…

Casey stumbled in. "They gassed me."

The register beeped under Chuck's hands, and he looked down at the screen as it turned from red to green. "Jericho!"

Casey reacted on instinct, and fell to the floor. Chuck, Shaw, and Jones had their guns drawn and ready as the freezer door hissed open. Something moved in the fog, something short, and they aimed a little lower.

Morgan stepped out of the shadows. "Hey Chuck." Sarah stepped out after him. "Sorry. Agent Carmichael. About time."

A/N2 Yes, Squirrel Girl defeated Thanos, and I alone among mortals, know how that momentous event occurred. I hope you'll drop me a line and tell me what you think of this rewrite so far.