-=Epilogue: Truth=-
Nobody was real.
Then again, that means nobody died. Nobody actually lost their life.
...
Except me.
Or at least, who I thought I was.
Who am I now?
Who are my friends, my family?
I don't even know what job I have here. Am I a physicist? If so, why was I involved in a simulation greenlit by the military and funded by friends of the Administrator?
What is truth, and what was part of the lie that was spun into an intricate web of binary code and psychological stimulations that so easily deceived me?
...
The Combine deceived me. But they were deceit incarnate, along with everything else I thought was the truth for the past however many years.
No, the real deceivers were my colleagues and their project.
And they weren't even the bad guys. They were just doing their job like half the people on Earth are.
Had I volunteered to be deceived?
What type of person was the Gordon Freeman that had volunteered?
And will I be around long enough to find out?
...
Probably not.
How ironic, I had desired the grave for so long. Had I died, would the simulation have ended?
Why didn't it end the first time I died?
Had my death and resurrection been part of the simulation?
Of course it had.
That was just another one of those tests, to see how I resolved the conflict of fighting for what was right or backing down when there was a much better option that would result in dire consequences for others.
Well then.
I wonder how well this whole simulation thing will go down with the media when they catch wind of the test subject's body being found, hanging from the roof?
Surprised?
Shocked?
Pissed?
I have to admit, the end of this story changed SO MANY TIMES, all of them quite different from each other. One had the end in the Palace of Nations back a few chapters, another had Gordon killing himself after realising that universal euthanasia truly was the kindest way to deal with the universe, another still had the Combine Empire still intact and a huge epic happy ending where the evacuation fleet arrived and Gordon went down in history as the man who saved the universe (effectively).
And then, there was the one I thought I would do up until very recently, where the Advisors complied with Gordon's ultimatum and they all lived happily ever after. Until Gordon killed himself and went onto that better place with Alyx and everyone else.
This twist came out of nowhere.
Perhaps you'd have preferred that last ending over this. But hey, sorry if that's the case. Besides, if you have a look at one of the earliest chapters, the Swedish general says something about fixing everything up on Earth before the evacuation fleet arrived (i.e restoring Combine jurisdiction). That was an error I never fixed, and it turned out to work in the end.
Well, hey, I hope you don't want to cut my head off for this ending. I know it's rather anticlimactic and depressing, but I guess that's the whole point.
Thanks to everyone who stuck with this fic, and for all your kind words. It's great getting such a good response and I really hope this didn't completely ruin it for you. I could have ended it differently, but this one, I think, has the most impact, even if it doesn't leave you feeling as satisfied as you might with Gordon having a big old party at the end.
Thanks for reading... there might be more from me in the future.