Chapter 38

"What did I do?" Alexis yelled, Sam shrank back. Sam told her she was alright, that Alexis hadn't meant too…but Alexis' pale sweaty face turned green and she ran to her bathroom to be sick.

"Sam, go down stairs and put some ice on that." Alice instructed.

Sam didn't argue, she wanted to escape Alexis' cries.

She scooped a few ice cubes into a plastic bag and covered the bag with a towel. She'd been down this road before. Control the swelling quickly so no one asks questions. She shook herself. It wasn't the same. Once she had her arm wrapped, she started to set the table. It was slow going, since she could only use one hand, but it gave her something to focus on.

She was finishing when Alice appeared at the bottom of the stairs. "Thank you for setting the table…but we'll need one more place, Dr. Collins is coming for dinner."

"He…he can't…he'll see my wrist…"

Alice put a hand on Sam's shoulder. "I already told him about it Sam…"

Sam began to tremble… "He'll take me away Alice!"

"No…Sam, I promise he won't." Alice smiled. "Alexis needs his help. Something is upsetting her a great deal. Dr. Collins will probably look at your wrist, but he knows she wasn't trying to hurt you."

"Does Alexis know he's coming?"

Alice nodded. "Yes, I told her."

"Is she mad…"

"I think, I think she's more relieved than angry." Alice answered slowly. "Will you please set one more place, and then get back to your homework."

"I'll get it." Sam called after the doorbell sounded. She looked through the peephole to make sure it was Kevin and opened the door.

"Hello Sam."

"Hi, Alexis is still up stairs, and Alice is finishing dinner."

"Great, that will give us a chance to catch up."

Oh great, Sam thought, she should have guessed he'd turn this into a session.

"Can I take a look at your wrist?"

"It was an accident!"

Kevin smiled. "I realize that Sam, but I'd still like to take a look."

Sam slid the towel and ice away and held out her arm.

"Hmm, you'll have a bruise for a couple of days, but I don't think amputation is necessary."

Sam blinked.

"It was a joke Sam."

She nodded…she'd known it was a joke…she just hadn't expected one.

"Can you tell me what happened?"

"She was having a nightmare, I tried to wake her up by shaking her, and she opened her eyes, but she didn't really wake up at all. I told her it hurt, but I don't think she heard me."

"You're probably right about her still being asleep. Were you scared?"

She nodded quickly. "Alice came…and she calmed her down, but … she looked so funny and her voice was different."

Kevin shifted in his seat. "So, I haven't seen you in a while…I take it school's going well."

They were done discussing Alexis. Sam understood and was grateful. "It was weird at first. I'm really behind in a couple of things, but Alice and Alexis are helping me."

"Good…how are things at home…other than today?"

"Well, I'm kinda grounded. Just from tv I think."

Kevin did his annoying little chuckle. "Oh, really. How did that come about?"

Sam rolled her eyes. Sometimes she really liked Kevin, and sometimes she really hated him.

"Dinner's served." Sam jumped up and showed Kevin his place. She took her own and automatically started serving herself. She'd forgotten her wrist briefly, but remembered as she lost her grip on the spoon. She looked up and saw Alexis' stricken face. Sam smiled. Alexis was dressed in jeans and a sweater with her hair piled on top of her head. She looked like Alexis again.

Dinner was a little awkward. Sam rambled on and on in an attempt to fill the silence. She talked about stupid stuff at school and well stupid stuff at school…there wasn't much else to talk about without upsetting someone. But she managed to do that anyway.

She asked about Emily. Kevin said she seemed 'better' whatever that meant. But Sam couldn't let it drop at that…she had to know what they were saying at school wasn't true. "She didn't kill Matt did she?"

"Sam!" Alexis yelled. She was disgusted with her. Sam wanted to crawl into a ball and die, but instead she made it worse. "He was her pusher."

Alexis was horrified. Sam couldn't look at her. She tried to explain…but she finally asked Alice if she could leave…and flew from the table when Alice agreed. She ran to her room and flung herself onto her bed.

Sam was curled on her bed reading A Tree Grows in Brooklyn. Francie's mother was giving birth and wanted Francie to stay close.

"Sam? May I come in?" Alexis called through her door.

Sam set the book down. Part of her wanted to say no. What if Alexis was still angry about what she'd said about Emily and Matt. She went to the door, opened it a crack and looked out. Alexis didn't look angry. She mostly looked tired.

"Hi…"

"Would it be alright if I came in for a few minutes?"

"I'm reading. For my book report."

"I won't stay long. I brought your dessert."

"Oh…I forgot." Sam said lamely. She stepped aside and allowed Alexis entry. Alexis set the ice cream on Sam's desk, then perched herself on the edge of the bed.

"Are you enjoying the book?"

"Yeah, it's good. Her dad…sorta reminds me of mine a little…but he's nicer."

Alexis blushed, but said nothing. Sam played with her ice cream. She didn't really want it anymore.

"I'm sorry." They said at the same time.

"Sam, you have nothing to be sorry about, I'm the one that hurt you."

Sam shifted uncomfortably. "I'm sorry about dinner…"

"Dinner?"

"What I said about Emily and Matt…it upset you again."

Alexis knelt down in front of Sam. "You didn't do or say anything wrong. The situation upsets me…not you."

"Is Kevin…is he gone?"

"He left a little bit ago…he gave me something to help me sleep."

"So you won't have anymore nightmares?"

"Hopefully not." Alexis returned to the bed. "I won't be able to take you to school in the morning, but I'll pick you up and we'll go out to dinner, just you and me okay?"

"You don't have too."

"I want to, and it's Friday." Alexis said as if that explained everything.

"Alexis…did something happen to your mom?" Sam regretted it as soon as she asked. Alexis sat motionless for a minute.

"I don't know, Sam, I don't remember her. I was told she and my father died in a car accident."

"But they didn't."

Alexis covered her mouth, tears in her eyes. "It's late, lights out in 30 minutes." She kissed the top of Sam's head and left the room quickly.

It took a while for Sam to get back into her book, but when she did, she got a little lost in it. When she finally looked at her clock, she realized she'd read an hour passed lights out. She put the book down and changed into her pjs, brushed her teeth and took her dessert bowl down to the kitchen.

Upstairs again Sam stared at Alexis' door. She knew she had to be asleep, or she would have caught Sam reading ages ago. She walked to the door and pushed it open. Alexis was dead to the world, peaceful. Sam found herself on the edge of Alexis' bed. She leaned over and brushed Alexis' hair back. Alexis didn't respond, except to roll slightly toward Sam.

Sam stood for several minutes, finally deciding that even though Alexis seemed okay, she shouldn't be alone. Sam slid under the covers, trying hard not to disrupt Alexis. She watched her closely, before her own eyes started to close against her will.

"I love you." It was barely audible, but Sam knew the sentiment true, even if she hadn't meant to say it aloud.