Dorian found himself incredibly distracted. He and Elden were ending their evening in a common enough way, curled up side by side on the couch reading their own books. Or, that is, Dorian would be reading if he could get himself to concentrate instead of staring fixedly at the same spot on the same page for longer than he'd like to admit. He wasn't actually sure when it had happened or who had initiated, but quite suddenly he'd realized they were holding hands and now he could think of nothing else.
The hand in his was warm and soft, much too soft for a warrior's hands. They were always like that despite the years of labor he had performed. They blistered easily and callused slowly and were a constant frustration for Elden. Still, Dorian loved them. And he loved being able to hold them in his own, to feel them against his skin.
It was ridiculous, such a small simple gesture, and yet to Dorian it somehow meant everything. He wasn't used to this, he wasn't used to Elden's tenderness and little ways of showing affection, and it was so frustrating how these sorts of things could completely throw him. Not only because he hated being taken off guard, he'd worked hard for this level of composure, but also because he wanted to be able to reciprocate, although he never knew how.
If anyone deserved such affection, it was Elden. He always showed more patience and understanding than he had any right to. Dorian was used to being entertaining, to keeping the attention of whoever he was with, knowing that as soon as he had nothing left to interest his partner, they would leave. And yet, here was Elden, giving everything while demanding nothing. Dorian never wanted Elden to feel as he himself had in the past. He wanted nothing more than to return all of this, the gestures and the tenderness and, more than anything, simply how Elden made him feel.
Dorian had been so caught up in his own thoughts that he hadn't realized that Elden seemed to have stopped reading as well. Although, instead of sitting at a single page like Dorian was, he had taken to turning pages more quickly than he could read, as if he was nervously attempting to hide his distraction. It was adorable and Dorian couldn't help the small smile pulling at his lips.
He still hardly knew what he was doing but Elden had said that they could figure this out together. So Dorian decide to take a page out of his book, doing something he would expect Elden to do in such a situation. He readjusted on the couch so he was leaning against Elden's shoulder, feeling his warmth and giving his hand a little squeeze for good measure.
He felt Elden stiffen a little at the sudden contact, but it didn't take long for him to settle in. Slowly but surely, Dorian could feel him relax until he even eventually returned to reading properly. It was amusing to see him flip back to figure out where he had left off. Dorian couldn't help his smug smile at the success. Putting Elden at ease was definitely an ability he would be proud to master.
Dorian was still unsure. He was on shaky ground and didn't know what might happen next. Still, it was worth it. He knew it was every time Elden smiled at him, every time Dorian pulled him close and felt his heartbeat against his chest. Every time Elden wrapped his arms around him, feeling so warm and secure. They could figure this out together and, no matter how fleeting, he would treasure simple moments like this one forever.