The wardens had finally arrived back in town after their trip to the deep roads, and Nathaniel had been apprising his fellow warden on everything that had occurred with the Architect while underground. Carver was also present for the debriefing, listening in fascination at the news given by his superior. Anders was thankful the young Hawke would be returning to Fereldan with the rest of the wardens the next day. Though it was obvious he cared for his sister, the two still fought whenever they were in the same room for longer than five minutes and the constant bickering was starting to wear away at the patience of everyone in the house. When Nathaniel completed his report, Anders left The Noble's Respite, heading for the Amell estate while Carver planned to stay the night to drink and socialize with his fellow wardens.
Entering the house, he greeted Bodahn and Sandal as they took the opportunity with Hawke restricted to bed to clean the fireplaces in other rooms of the estate. It was a much needed, dirty job and Anders found himself chuckling at the young savant leaving sooty hand prints all over the white stone walls while his father clicked his tongue and tried unsuccessfully to admonish his much-loved son as he chuckled along with the mage.
"Pretty!" exclaimed the blonde dwarf, turning towards Anders looking for confirmation of his "artwork."
"I think it would be much better on some parchment," Bodahn managed to wheeze out from behind a dirty cloth tied to cover his nose and mouth, protecting him from the ash that always managed to get stirred up while cleaning the hearth.
His father's words prompted the young dwarf to rush to his enchantment chest and pull sheets of parchment from the interior. He quickly brought the thick paper back to his father's side and began placing his dirty hand prints on the blank vellum. Quickly placing several prints on the sheet, he then handed the paper to Anders.
"Pretty lady better?" Sandal inquired, concern shining from his pale blue eyes.
"She will be," Anders promised, taking the offered parchment.
"Gift for lady," the blonde dwarf stated motioning to the sheet in Anders' hands.
"I'll give it to her," the healer vowed, as the young dwarf returned to the pile of vellum on the floor.
Anders quickly headed towards the stairs, a spring in his step that had been missing since that fateful night almost a month prior. Their bedroom door was open, signalling Hawke's being awake and welcoming visitors. He entered their room and let his eyes feast upon her as she sat propped up by numerous pillows on the bed. She was alone but the healer could tell her last visitor was Varric considering she had her writing supplies and journal on the bed with her. He watched her as her brow was furrowed in concentration as her quill rapidly flew over the bound parchment of her journal, stopping only ocassionally to scratch at Demon's ears as the mabari sprawled on the bed next to her in the place Anders usually occupied. The dog raised his head to look at the mage hovering in the doorway but let out a soft, slightly angry huff before lowering his head and enjoying the feel of being near his master once again. During the course of Mari's convalescence, the blonde warden had sent him with Aveline to the barracks in the hopes the guardsmen would keep the mabari distracted enough while his master was in a coma. Demon was still holding a grudge against Anders, knowing he was the one who was behind his banishment from his master's side. Several moments passed before his fellow mage glanced up from her writings, finally feeling a presence in the room. Anders' heart skipped a beat as joy suffused her face when she finally noticed him, beckoning him to her side since she was under strict orders to remain in bed. After blotting the wet ink to make sure it was dry, his lover handed off her writing supplies so he could join her in the bed.
"How did it go?" she queried when he finally sat on the edge of the bed facing her.
"I think it went about as well as it could for them when they were down there," Anders answer, unable to give further detail because of warden secrets. Minutes passed without further conversation as Hawke studied the mage in front of her. Finally she reached out a skeletal hand and caressed Anders' jawline. His eyes closed slowly, reveling in her touch, a feeling he had solely missed while she was unconscious. When he finally gazed at her again, her eyes welled with concern, as she noticed the bags under his eyes, his gaunt features and the way his clothes now hung loosely off his frame.
"You didn't take care of yourself," she gently admonished, her hand dropping to grab one of his resting on the bed.
"You were more important," Anders admitted reluctantly, unable to meet her penetrating gaze so he instead watched their joined hands.
"Evidently," her musical laughter seemed muted and forced as she brought her other hand to his chin and forced his tawny gaze to meet her aquamarine. When he met her orbs, he saw a flash of anger that she managed to quickly hide behind concern. "You're important to me, you know. Did you honestly think I wouldn't notice how much you've changed?"
"Taking care of myself was the last thing on my mind," Anders anger began to mount at her lecture forcing him to rise from her side and move to the hearth. He stared into the flames, remembering how close he had been to actually losing her. "I almost lost you," he forced out quietly, his voice breaking slightly from the anguish he currently felt.
"I know," she breathed warily. "I didn't plan to put you through that kind of heartache."
"So why did you do it?"
"Because it was the right thing to do!" she exclaimed passionately before huffing at her inability to rise from the bed and make him face her. "She's my best friend, do you really think I would let them take Bela away and do Maker knows what to her? Fenris has told me some of the stories about the qunari, and they are not forgiving of transgressions. I would die to protect each and every one of you."
"And that's the problem!" Anders roared, turning in his rage to stare at the woman he loved with every fiber of his being as he ranted his frustration. "You put yourself in these dangerous situations and don't even think about those you would leave behind. You went into the deeps, against my better judgement I went with you, and your brother was tainted, which could have just as easily been you. You constantly put yourself in the templars sights, without regard for the fact that any one of them could have carted you off to the circle and the rest of us would probably die as well for protecting you. And now it's even worse, as the city's champion, if you don't do exactly as Meredith dictates she'll eagerly strip you of your title and kill you or worse make you tranquil. I-I couldn't live through that..."
"Anders," Marianna whispered after he trailed off, bitter anguish quickly replacing his spent anger and frustration. She motioned him to come closer and the healer collapsed on the bed, his arms wrapped around her waist and his head resting on her lap. Her small hand swiftly untied the leather thong keeping his hair bound and began running her deft fingers through his blonde locks trying to comfort him. Her hand stilled when there was a soft knock on the open door and the two mages looked up to see Orana hovering in the entryway.
"Is everything alright, Mistress?" the elf questioned softly, her face a slight pink at the sight of Anders lifting his head from Mari's lap.
"We're fine Orana," Hawke replied, a smile ghosting across her lips at the servant's obvious discomfort. "Just a little argument but thank you for your concern." At Marianna's reassurance, the elf turned to leave but was stopped by her next sentence.
"Orana, I'm not your master, you don't have to call me mistress," Hawke chided mildly. "I've told you to call me Mari, all my family does."
"If you insist, Mistr- Mari," a small smile appeared on the quiet elf's features as she ducked her head before departing the bedroom.
Anders' head returned to Hawke's lap after the handmaid left. "I'm sorry," she finally uttered quietly as she returned to stroking his golden locks.
"Me too," he murmured, his face still buried in her lap not daring to break their bubble of comfort and love by moving. A shiver ran through his body as he enjoyed the way she skillfully soothed his anguish by stroking his mane. Her actions managed to bring about vague memories of his mother doing much the same thing when he was decades younger in the Anderfels before he was dragged to the circle when he was known by another name entirely. A name he kept locked in his memory and would only share with the woman in front of him on the night of their wedding.
"I can try to change if it truly bother-" Hawke began before Anders sat up quickly and hushed her with a gentle finger to her full lips.
"No don't," Anders spoke looking serious as he removed his finger and stroked her gaunt cheek. "You risking your life for others is one of the things I love about you. Even though it frustrates me to see you risk your own safety time and again, I wouldn't have you change for all the sovereigns in Thedas. Just think about it, if you didn't risk your life for others we never would have met."
"True," her blue-green eyes sparkled with amusement. "You would have been taken down by crazy dwarves in the sewers."
"Exactly," Anders agreed before placing a gentle kiss to the center of her forehead. He moved to kiss both of her eyelids and enjoyed the way her breath caught under her tender affection. He paused gazing at her berry mouth, his thumb gently caressing the lower lip before her eagerness had her pulling Anders towards her seeking his lips in a searing, love-filled kiss. Heat flooded through the warden before settling in his groin at their shared fervor as the kiss continued. It had been too long since he had kissed her with such heat and he deeply regretted his next action as he broke the kiss.
"We can't love," he stated breathlessly, groaning when her desire filled eyes took on an edge of hurt. "Not yet anyway, you need to heal more before we can."
"Fine," Hawke grumbled leaning her forehead against her fellow mage's. The two regained their lost breath before Anders noticed her grin turn coquettish and he felt a thrill run through him despite the fact he knew whatever was on her mind was bound to drive him mad with desire. "We need a bath," she finally declared pulling back and flipping the covers from her atrophied legs.
"Fine, fine," the blonde mage sighed, not daring to protest against her request. "I'll have Bodahn and Orana prepare one."
When the promise appeased her, Anders left her with a goofy grin lighting up her face as she began the arduous process of moving her legs to hang over the edge of the bed while she waited for him to return. It didn't take Anders long to find Orana, as she was in the guest room Carver had been in the last month changing the bed linens in preparation for its future use. He relayed the need for a bath to be drawn before he returned to their room. He came to hover by her side when she insisted on standing without any assistance upon his return to her bedside.
The healer watched with growing trepidation as she somehow managed to push herself off the bed but due to her legs' weakness couldn't find her balance and began to topple forward. Anders caught her before she fell too far forward, knowing this would happen when she requested the chance of getting up without help. He quickly swept her up so he was cradling her in his arms. Even though he hadn't taken care of himself while the raven beauty was in her coma, he was still strong enough to pick up her wasted form with very little effort.
"Bad idea?" she giggled lightly, wrapping her arms around his neck.
"You think?" Anders bounced her to redistribute her weight causing her to squeak in surprise before he walked towards the bathroom.
Hawke managed to convince the Darktown healer to join her in the bath but was unable to get Anders to relieve both of their mounting tension. The blonde kept insisting she need more time to regain her strength before they could make love to each other again. Eventually the raven haired mage gave up and allowed her lover to take care of her before they returned to the bedroom and dinner was quickly brought up. After dinner, Marianna was able to convince Anders to carry her to the library for a change of scenery and a chance to get out of the bed. The evening was spent with Mari reading to her love while he sat behind her with his arms wrapped around on the chaise enjoying the sound of her voice.
A/N: So initially this was going to be a few little snip-its about Hawke's recovery after being knocked out for a month, but this first snip-it took on a life of it's own (which is a good thing, right? It means more story, right...right? Haha, we'll see.). So we'll save the sexy times for the next chapter.
On another note: I'm basing Hawke's trouble walking on my recent childbirth after getting an epidural for the pain (numb from the waist down man, only way to go). I imagine after not walking for a month and having slight atrophy in the legs would be much like the tingling that occurred after I got partial feeling back in my legs: knowing how my legs were supposed to move but being unable to truly complete the action.