Chapter 37

Gwen and Heather

A/N: Hello everyone, Izzy Parker here. Ziggie is… um… sick. Yeah, he's sick this week, so I'm taking his place.

*cue gagged squeals from the corner of the room*

Yeah, so anyways, I'll be narrating this chapter. And it's gonna be so much fun, there's gonna be so much eventful stuff going on, some of which might be involving Lindsay. See, I'm really good at foreshadowing, right? Fuck it, let's start the story.

Time: 31 March 2008

Trent woke up that morning, with sweat covering his body… his muscular… sweaty… FOCUS IZZY!

"What seems to be the problem?" Leanne asked.

"I just had a horrible nightmare!" Trent yelled, forgetting once again that he was technically talking to himself.

"Well… y'know, I would say that you're getting a little old for nightmares… but then I realized you're never too old for nightmares." Leanne said.

"Wow… that was creepy, yet strangely profound," Trent replied.

"So… what was this so-called 'horrible nightmare'?"

"Well, I dreamed I was stuck on an island as part of some kind of contest… for like 100 grand or something."

"Well, that's not so bad."

"And I had no personality, and was secretly kinda crazy, and had an obsession with the number 11… no wait, it was 9."

"So which one was it, 9 or 11," Leanne said, and then chuckled, "And are you planning on blowing up any buildings with that information?"

"Leanne… that wasn't funny." Trent said.

"Why, does that offend you?"

"No… it was just a bad joke."

Leanne pouted… well actually, no one really knew for sure if she'd pouted because she only existed in Trent's subconscious which is kind of weird if you think about it and I'm not sure it's technically possible… but that's beside the point.

"So, what else was in this awful dream of yours?"

"Well, I basically spent the entire time trying to get Gwen to like me, and she wouldn't, and then when she finally did, I went fucking psycho."

"Uh-huh," Leanne said, "Anything else?"

"Oh yeah, and Owen Foster was there… and he was actually significant."

"Wow," Leanne said, "That is awful… and I'm not even being sarcastic, seriously that sucks. How do you even deal with that stupid, gelatinous ball of lard?

"I dunno," Trent said, "Now I'm going back to sleep, please leave me alone."

And yeah, that's basically how it went. Of course, Owen's not a stupid gelatinous ball of lard, in fact, he's quite intelligent and while he's definitely overweight he's a super nice guy who always has a positive outlook on life and in fact he's kinda cute in a fat sort of way and… this rant has absolutely nothing to do with the plot, does it?

Later that day

So Lindsay, after discovering her sister in a porn video which she feverishly masturbated to (real smooth Lindsay; serves you right for dumping me,) decided to call her sister to figure out what the fuck was up. However, Karen no longer lived on this hemisphere, and therefore, Lindsay had no way of being able to contact her older sister (once again, serves you right you stupid slut.)

So, Lindsay did the best thing she, with her tiny little brain, could think of doing; going onto her Facebook private messages and sending one herself. It read: "Karen, we need to talk. Call me at ###-###-#### ASAP." (And no, I'm not going to reveal her phone number to the general public. I may hate the stupid cunt, but I'm not that vindictive.)

Sure enough a few hours later, Karen managed to call her.

"Hello?" Karen said.

"Yeah, hi," Lindsay said, "Anyways, I have something to talk to you about."

"Uh-huh…" Karen said.

"Well… yesterday I was online… viewing pornography."

"Were you now?" Karen said.

"And I kinda found you in a video," Lindsay said.

Karen said nothing.

"Hello? Are you still there?"

"Um… well… um… the number you reached is not in service. Please leave a message at the tone. When you're finished, hang up, or press # for more options. BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE- [inhale] EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!"

Lindsay hung up, obviously frustrated by her sister's complete lack of an answer. However, she called back, determined to find what was up.

"Karen, I'm not joking here. You can tell me what's going on here."

"Why should I?" Karen asked, "In case you haven't noticed, Lindsay, I'm an adult. I can make decisions for myself, thank you very much."

"I know. I'm just worried about you."

"Why? We were never that close when we were kids."

"Yeah, but we're still sisters."

"If you want to know so bad, fine," Karen said, "Sam left me and I needed an easy way to make money, so there. Happy?"

"Well… where are you living now?"

"Well… I'm in Germany at the moment."

"Well, that's kinda cool," Lindsay said, "I'm planning a trip to Europe with a couple of my friends this summer, so maybe I'll see you there."

"Yeah, well… let's hope not," Karen said, before hanging up quickly. Lindsay tried calling her back, but it went to voicemail. After that, she figured it probably wasn't worth trying anymore, so she lit a smoke and went over to Courtney's house.

When she arrived at Courtney's; however, the first thing that happened was she got punched, right in the eye.

"Ow…" Lindsay yelled, "What the fuck, Courtney?"

"April Fools!" Courtney shouted.

"That's your April Fool's joke?" Lindsay complained, "Now I'm gonna have a shiner for the next few weeks, all thanks to you… bitch."

"Well… that was kind of the point."

"I'm pretty sure the point of April Fool's is pranks," Lindsay said, "Not pain."

"Well yeah… but rule of funny trumps all."

Lindsay sighed, "Oh well… I'm gonna go see what Duncan's up too."

"Um… Duncan's in the police station right now."

"Really?"

"Yeah… he and Trent decided that for April Fool's day, they would fake a robbery of the local Hy-Vee… suffice to say it didn't go over very well with the cops."

"Oh…" Lindsay said, "Well, in that case, I think I'll call Gwen."

"Why are you trying to avoid me?" Courtney asked.

"I just wanna talk to some other people. Is that so bad?"

Courtney shrugged her shoulders and went to watch TV.

Lindsay quickly picked up her cell phone and called Gwen, who promptly picked up her own phone.

"Hey Linds," Gwen said, "What's good?"

"Meh… nothing really. Just wanted to see what you're doing for April Fools."

"Um… I'm not really doing anything. Just hanging around my house and- OH GOD DAMN IT!"

"What's the problem?" Lindsay asked.

"I just stepped in a rat trap… fuck that hurt. FUCK YOU HEATHER!"

Lindsay heard a distant voice say, "Actually that was me."

"Oh… FUCK YOU MEGAN!" Gwen yelled.

"God, I hate her sometimes," Gwen said, "Anyways, I gotta get going, so… bye."

Lindsay hung up the phone. I wonder where she's gotta go, Lindsay thought, but eventually just went to go watch TV with Courtney.

Time: 6 April 2008

"You know, we don't do this nearly often enough," Lindsay said.

"I know," Duncan said, "But I've been too busy with, y'know; school, work, Courtney… all the usual stuff."

"Courtney's a burden?" Lindsay asked.

"Don't get me wrong, I love her… but she can wear you down after a little while."

"Oh trust me, I know that," Lindsay said, "But this is pretty cool, just the two of us, all alone."

"Yeah… just smoking that bong and staring at the night sky." Duncan answered with a smile.

Wait a minute… I thought they were having sex… oh wait, I guess that was the joke. It actually wasn't very funny; in fact, the entire joke was kind of…

*cue punch in the face*

"Hey, give me my narration job back."

"But… it's mine now."

"No, you're a terrible narrator. It's my job."

"Fine… but only if you put me on the Europe Trip."

"We have a deal."

*return to story*

Hi everyone, it's me, Ziggie. Anyways yeah… the entire joke of that last scene was basically to lead you to the conclusion that Duncan and Lindsay are having an affair, while in actuality they are merely engaging in the use of illegal (yet basically harmless) drugs. Let's move on to something more significant.

Time: 9 April 2008

Courtney was over at Gwen's house, a place she hadn't been in a while. It wasn't that they weren't friends; it was just that both of them generally had their own people that they hung out with.

"So, what should we do?" Courtney asked, "I mean, I don't exactly want to get drunk tonight, considering we have school tomorrow, and we both have boyfriends…"

"Courtney, is that all you ever think about?" Gwen asked, "Booze and sex."

"Well no… I think about school sometimes too. But that's not exactly very useful right now either."

"I guess we could just check to see what's on TV," Gwen said.

"Sure, why not. Is Heather around here?"

"I think she's here somewhere."

Suddenly, Gwen and Courtney heard the footsteps of someone walking into the living room. Courtney heard the footsteps, and expecting to see Heather, turned around. Instead she saw what appeared to be a handsome teenager, with long brown hair and a cute smile. Courtney wasn't quite sure who this was for a while, as she never remembered seeing anyone who looked like this before, but then it hit her.

"Is that… Rudy?" She asked.

"Yeah, he's really grown up over the past few months, hasn't he?"

"He's fucking hot," Courtney said quietly.

"Careful Courtney, he's my brother," Gwen said.

"And I'm also currently in a relationship," Rudy added, his voice considerably deeper than Courtney remembered it, "And so are you, if I remember correctly."

"Rudy… can I talk to you for a minute?" Gwen asked, "In private."

"Um… sure."

Gwen pulled Rudy away from the living room and into a separate room inside the house.

"Rudy… when a girl tells you that you're hot, you don't lecture her about it," Gwen said.

"Well, why not," Rudy said.

"Because you could've just said thanks."

"Well, I was trying to make sure there was not going to be any cheating," Rudy said, "Which is something I care about, unlike you."

"What do you mean?" Gwen asked.

"Well, just be happy I haven't told Geoff about you and Heather," Gwen said.

"Wait… how did you find out?"

"Could you two make it any less obvious. I mean, you're constantly ogling each other, and whispering seductively to each other… plus I live here, so I always get to hear you two screaming from the basement."

"Y'know, Courtney's in the next room," Gwen said.

"Sorry," Rudy said briefly, before lowering the volume of his voice and continuing, "So no, I'm not gonna tell Geoff, but… if you want to keep it a secret, you should make it a little less obvious. Now I have to meet a friend, so I gotta go. Tell Courtney I said bye."

And so Rudy left. He quickly went over to the local Krispy Kreme, where he met up with a girl he agreed to meet earlier.

"Hi Rudy!" She yelled enthusiastically, ran up and hugged him.

"Hey Tanya," Rudy said back, much more calmly, but still with an obvious happiness in his voice.

Time: 13 April 2008

"Oh please, please let me come on this trip," Ashley begged Lindsay.

"Ashley, you've been begging me for the past 45 minutes. I already told you, I've invited enough people as is. I can't just add another person just because you really want to.

Lindsay went over to the Morrow house and Ashley followed behind her, much to Lindsay's dismay. There she met up with Rudy, who also argued to allow Ashley on the trip.

"Rudy," Lindsay said, "The only reason you're coming is because Ace basically forced me to take you. I'm not going to bring Ashley when I already have 17 people coming."

"Actually Lindsay," Heather interrupted, "There's 18 people going."

"18?"

"Well, Gwen and I might have invited Izzy."

Lindsay glared at her, "And why the hell would you invite Izzy? You know how our relationship ended."

Heather sighed, "Listen, she's cool, she's fun, she's hot, and she'll make the trip totally awesome; I know you two have a little bit of bad blood, but you gotta get over it at some point."

Lindsay sighed, "Fine… I give up; she can come… Ashley can come too. But this trip better be the greatest fucking thing ever if I'm gonna pay for 19 plane tickets."

Time: 16 April 2008

"OH GOD! OH GOD DON'T STOP!"

Rudy heard that coming from Ace's room. He instantly knew it must be her, and he also instantly knew she was having sex, bust he was still worried about her for some reason. Obviously he was long past the age where he didn't know exactly what Ace was up to, as a matter of fact, Rudy wasn't a virgin himself, but something just felt wrong. So he quietly tip-toed his way over to Ace's bedroom, and opened the door just enough to see what was happening.

It turned out Ace was completely fine, and his hunch that she was in trouble was wrong… kind of. Rudy got to see a good look at the man's face, and saw that it was none other than Micah Lee. Rudy didn't know Micah too well, but he did know that he was the guy who tried to take Rudy's sisters away (at this point in time, Heather was basically like a sister to him) and was also the guy who may or may not have killed Todd. Either way, definitely not a trustworthy person and Ace knew that.

What the hell is she doing? Rudy wondered, didn't she use to hate this dude?

Rudy quickly closed the door and went back to his room. He'd seen all that he really needed to see that night, and besides, he didn't want to accidentally get caught in a place that was making him sick being there in the first place.

Time: 17 April 2008

The next day, Rudy explained to Heather and Gwen about what he saw the previous night. Gwen mentioned that it was a little bit strange that he was spying on Ace, but the issue was quickly dropped after that. Both girls believed him, but they both wondered what exactly they could do about it.

"Well… you could kill him, just like you did to Gary and Shawn," Rudy suggested.

"Rudy, that's my father we're talking about," Heather said.

"And even if he wasn't," Gwen added, "We can't just go around killing people. Gary and Shawn were absolute monsters who had kidnapped Bridgette and taken numerous lives, Micah's just an asshole."

"But he killed Todd," Rudy said.

"There's no evidence it was him," Heather answered matter-of-factly.

"You know, I could be mistaken," the three of them heard a voice from upstairs, "But I would've sworn you were talking about me."

Micah began walking down the stairs and parked himself right in front of the three teenagers.

"What are you planning, Micah?" Heather asked.

"Planning? Who do you think I am, David Xanatos?"

Heather sighed in annoyance, "What are you doing with Ace?"

"For the record, Heather, I don't have to tell you anything that isn't your business in the first place."

At that moment, Ace then walked down the stairs, following her new boyfriend.

"Well, allow me to explain," She started, "Micah and I met up some time, and after talking a bit, I figured out that he wasn't such a bad guy after all. And then we just kinda… went from there."

"How long have you two been dating?" Gwen asked.

"Just a few weeks," Ace said, "But I think we might have a future together. I'm still a little bit sad about Todd, but it's about time I moved on with my life, besides, I need a man around to help me take care of my baby."

Ace then left, going back upstairs, leaving Micah smirking at the teenagers.

"You see girls; maybe we actually do care about each other."

"I don't buy it," Gwen said.

"You can buy or not buy whatever you want, but that doesn't change the fact that you should probably get used to me, because chances are, you'll be seeing me a lot in the foreseeable future."

Gwen and Rudy turned around and left. Heather was about to follow them, before turning back at the last second and telling her dad, "You know what, no, you aren't Xanatos. Xanatos actually gives a shit about his girl."

"WHY YOU LITTLE-" Micah was about to go on a tirade, before he caught himself at the last minute, and continued, "It would be very unwise of you to snark me like that."

Time: 24 April 2008

Rudy met up again with Tanya, this time at the movie theatre. Tanya; however, had a few questions to ask her new friend.

"Rudy, we've been hanging out for a little while now," she said.

"Uh-huh," Rudy answered.

"And you can say we're good friends, right?"

"Of course," Rudy said, "What's your point?"

"Well… I kinda… I think I like you."

"Yeah, well… I like you too, Tanya."

"No I mean… like you like you."

"Well… I kinda like you too," Rudy said with a smile, "But unfortunately, I'm already dating Ashley, so…"

Tanya interrupted his train of thought by giving him a brief kiss on the cheek, "Just consider?"

Rudy let out a meek smile, "Well… okay I guess."

After Tanya left, Rudy sat outside on the bench, calling himself stupid for playing that whole situation so poorly, and for jeopardizing his relationship with Ashley.

Time: 28 April 2008

Geoff was having a party over at his house, nothing new there. Gwen obviously showed up, bringing both Lindsay and Heather along with her, but for the most part, spent time with Geoff.

"Look at them over there," Heather told Lindsay, referring to Gwen and Geoff smooching in the corner, "All happy and annoying and whatnot." She continued, angrily sipping her beer (is it possible to angrily sip beer? Well if it is, she was doing it.)

"Uh-huh…" Lindsay responded.

"I mean, the way they're all touchy and whatnot… it's just fucking weird."

"You sound jealous as hell," Lindsay responded.

"I'm not jealous," Heather said.

"You sure?" Lindsay asked, "Because you sound really jealous of Geoff."

"Of Geoff?"

"C'mon, let's get real here. You and Gwen are FWB's, and you spend so much time together that you're basically a couple, except undisclosed. Why don't you just tell Gwen how you feel, I'm 100% certain she feels the same way."

Heather nervously looked at her drink, "Maybe, but not today. It's just not a good time."

"Suit yourself," Lindsay said, and began to drink some more.

Lindsay's eyes began to wander, when she saw a super sexy black-haired girl walking towards her. She was wearing incredibly skimpy clothes, with a super short skirt and thigh high leather boots, and was wearing just enough makeup to look sexy without looking scary. She also had her hair down, and while that made it a little bit wild, it looked incredibly good on this girl. It took Lindsay a second to register who this individual was, just because she'd gone under such a dramatic change, but then it clicked.

"Eva?" Lindsay asked, "Is that you?"

"Well of course it's me," Eva said.

"You look… absolutely fucking beautiful," Lindsay said, at first trying to come up with a more suitable expression.

"Are you saying I looked ugly before?" Eva teased.

"Well… no… um…" the blonde girl was having a little bit of difficulty thinking of what to say. Fortunately for her, Eva sat down on her lap and kissed her. The two of them than looked up to see Courtney staring at them, half-drooling.

"Could you… um… marry me?" Courtney asked.

Eva laughed, "Courtney, you're high. Or drunk; sometimes it's a little hard to tell the difference."

Heather was still sitting next to Lindsay, laughing her fucking ass off.

"So, where's Sarah?" Lindsay asked Eva.

"She couldn't make it," Eva said, "She's having parental issues."

"Oh…" Lindsay said, "I really hate her dad."

"So do I," Eva said.

Before Lindsay could add anything else, she was approached by Ezekiel, who looked drunk out of his mind. When and how Ezekiel got to the party in the first place, Lindsay had no idea, as she didn't remember him leaving the house, but I suppose that was beside the point.

"Lindsay," Ezekiel said, "You have to come with me, I need to talk to you," he continued in a very hazy melodic voice, a voice that made him sound not like he was giving an order but more like he was stargazing.

"What's the problem?" Lindsay asked.

"Well… I was thinking I should tell you that… well, y'know Ernest?"

"Yes, I know Ernest." Lindsay said.

"Well… he secretly has a crush on you. And he's been jerking off to pics of you."

Lindsay sighed, "Does every creepy adult have to have a crush on me. God, I feel like a real life Mary Sue sometimes."

"Mary Sue?"

"Nevermind. Is that it?"

"Oh yeah, and Mary's a vampire."

"Really?"

"No," Ezekiel started laughing hysterically, "I'm just fucking with you."

He kept laughing for a long time, and this soon became accompanied with rolling around on the ground.

"Um… I think Zeke's turned into a hyena," Lindsay said, but of course, no one was listening to her joke.

After the party was over, Lindsay and Ezekiel were going home, and Eva decided to tag along with them. Walking back to Eva's place (which was relatively close,) they saw none other than Julius Smiley, tied up to a stop sign.

"Officer," Lindsay sneered.

Smiley growled at them.

"Y'know, I really wish I'd seen what happened," Eva said, "I bet it was pretty awesome."

"Trust me Eva, everyone wishes they'd seen what happened," Lindsay said.

"And it definitely was awesome!"

They looked around to see Izzy come up from behind the stop sign (how and why she was hiding there will never be explained, nor should it,) and boldly announce that she got in an epic battle which 'raged on for a long time,' with the police officer, and ended up with her emerging victorious and him tied to the stop sign.

"Y'know, there are a lot of people out there who probably wished they had been there for the action," Ezekiel said.

"I… just kinda said that," Lindsay announced, "Oh, and by the way Izzy, you do realize you're probably going to end up getting arrested for this?"

Izzy thought for a moment, sighed and said, "Shit."

Time: 30 April 2008

Rudy and Ashley were out on a date. Ashley then decided it would be a wonderful time to bring up Tanya.

"Y'know Rudy, I've seen you hanging out with this other girl a lot."

"Um… do you mean Tanya?" Rudy asked.

"Yeah that's her name."

"Well, don't worry about her. She's just a friend of mine, honestly."

"Um… sure," Ashley said, "Listen, do you think it's possible you two could, um… stop being friends."

Rudy paused for a second, "What." He said flatly.

"Well, it's nothing personal, I'm just a little bit uncomfortable with how close you two are getting."

Rudy stared at her for a second, "Are you honestly telling me I'm not allowed to have female friends?"

"Well… no… listen, it's taking a lot of guts for me just to come and say this, could you try being a little more, I don't know, respectful?"

"Respectful?" Rudy asked, visibly pissed, "Listen, you can't just tell me who I can and can't hang out with."

"Well, I am your girlfriend," Ashley said.

"But not my owner," Rudy said, storming off angrily, and once again, ruining the night (although to be fair, it's hard to blame him entirely… or at all, really.)

Time: 4 May 2008

"So… where are we going again?" Bridgette asked.

"We're going to Don's," Lindsay said, "You know, that bar that Heather, Gwen and I go to a lot?"

"We… kinda just explained that," Courtney said.

"Well… I wasn't paying attention. I was busy."

"Doing what?" Lindsay asked.

"Editing my fanfic," Bridgette, "Wanna see?"

"Um… okay."

Bridgette pulled her laptop out of the bag she was carrying around.

"How are you going to get Wi-Fi in the truck?"

"I already had the fic open when we left."

Lindsay took the laptop from Bridgette and began reading where she left off.

"Okay, so Mary Sue, I mean Bridget, breaks up with Draco and is now going out with Seamus… fair enough… and Draco is now going out with Harry," Lindsay stopped for a minute, glared at Bridgette, then continued, "Alright fine. And let's see… Ron is going out with Neville…" Lindsay then stopped again.

"Is something wrong?" Bridgette asked.

"How dare you…" Lindsay said.

"What?"

"RON WEASLEY IS NOT GAY!" Lindsay yelled.

"Shut up back there," Duncan complained, "I'm trying to focus on driving the damn car."

"Well you're not doing a very good job," Courtney said.

"Bridgette, that's even worse," Lindsay said, "You can't just make a whole bunch of characters gay, despite the fact that they showed no interest in each other in the actual canon."

"Well, why not?" Bridgette said, "I mean, don't you ship Kim and Shego together?"

"Well, yeah, but…"

"And Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn; and Raven and Starfire; and Toph and Katara; hell, you even told me once that you ship Demona and Elisa together, cuz, y'know, it's not like they're trying to kill each other or anything. So, Lindsay, please explain to me how that's different?"

"Ooh, good luck getting out of this one, blondie," Courtney said.

"Because lesbians," Lindsay replied.

"Works for me," Courtney answered, leaving Bridgette pouting.

"Hey," Duncan complained, "I'd like to wait until I after get shitfaced before I get in a car crash."

"Then don't crash," Courtney replied.

"Well it's a little difficult to focus when you three are yelling about being fangirls back there. We get it; Bridgette's a yaoi fangirl, Lindsay's a yuri fangirl, and Courtney is… something. Now, can we please end this conversation, because I am literally now dumber for having heard it."

"How can you use 'lesbians' as a justification for your blatant homophobia," Bridgette complained, completely ignoring what Duncan just said.

"Go spend the night with 5 girls, he said," Duncan mumbled to himself, "They won't annoy the ever loving fuck out of you, he said."

(A/N: He=Geoff)

"Well, why don't you ask Gwen and Heather whether or not 'lesbians' is a justification," Lindsay said.

Gwen and Heather were in the backseat of the truck (for the record, Lindsay and Bridgette were in the middle, and obviously Duncan and Courtney were up front.) Bridgette turned around, about to ask the two girls, when instead saw them in a 69 position, completely naked, eating each other out.

"Am… am I seeing this right?" Bridgette asked.

"As a matter of fact, you are," Lindsay said, "The two of them have been friends with benefits since last summer."

Bridgette kept staring, "You know, I usually consider myself a heterosexual female, but I gotta admit; that's fucking hot."

"Indeed it is," Lindsay said, with a smug air of superiority around her, "But going back to your story, your entire premise is flawed, right from the start. I mean, your story begins with: OK, so you know that time early in your life, when you're like 1 year old, and you feel like everything in the world is right. When things are perfect, and you feel like nothing could ever go wrong. Even if we ignore the grammatical errors, what kind of brainless dumbass starts a story like that anyways?"

"Hey, I like that beginning," Courtney said, "It's catchy, and it sets the tone for what has the potential to be a decent and well-written, if not fantastic, story overall."

"And I would like it if everyone stopped talking about fucking Fanfiction," Duncan said, "But that's not going to happen, is it?"

"You do realize no one cares, right Duncan?" Bridgette asked.

"You do realize no one cares about you, right Bridgette?" Duncan countered.

"That was an awful comeback," Lindsay said, "You should feel ashamed."

Duncan sighed, "And this is what you get for being the only guy in the group."

"If that makes you uncomfortable, you should talk to your local plastic surgeon about it," Courtney said, and Lindsay and Bridgette started giggling.

"You know Courtney, as my girlfriend, you should be standing up for me."

"I know, but making fun of you is just too much fun."

"I know what you mean," Lindsay said, "I make fun of Eva all the time."

"Yeah, 'cuz if anyone else made fun of Eva; she'd smack the living fuck out of them." Bridgette replied.

"Good point," Lindsay said.

Duncan was about to reply, when he then pulled into the parking lot of the bar, "Well look at that, we're here. Gwen; Heather; are you two finished back there?"

"Just… wait one moment," Heather called out.

The two eventually got out of the car, and headed towards the bar. The bartender recognized 5 of them, and considering how Bridgette was a friend of theirs, let them all in (as per usual, breasts have something to do with it.) They then noticed that the bartender working there was, not too surprisingly, the same one from the last time the girls showed up here.

"Oh look," Lindsay said, "It's Tara the racist bartender again."

They walked up and sat in their usual spots, which was relatively near the bartender but not the actual counter.

"Hi Tara," Lindsay said.

"Oh, hey Lindsay," Tara replied.

"What's good?"

"Not much," Tara said, "I think the stupid Jews are trying to get me fired."

Lindsay shrugged and went over to where the other five were sitting. They ordered drinks and eventually went on with their night, most of which was spent making jokes at Bridgette and/or Duncan's expense and making "take a drink every time X happens" games. At about 10:30 pm that evening, at the point when everyone was considerably drunk, Gwen met a familiar face, who sat down with the sextet.

"Hey Gwen," she said, "How's life' it's been a while, hasn't it?"

"I know," Gwen said, "But then again, we weren't really planning on turning out hookups into a regular thing, were we Ellen?"

Ellen sat on Gwen's lap, with her legs stretched across in a way that she accidentally kicked Bridgette a few times.

"Ow…" Bridgette said, "That kinda hurts you know."

"Sorry…" Ellen said, giggling lightly.

"What's so funny?"

"How adorable you are."

Bridgette really wasn't quite sure whether to be angry or flattered. Thankfully for her, Heather managed to strike up a conversation to keep her mind off of the dilemma.

"So… where are your friends from last time?" Heather asked.

"You mean Kris and Cassie?" Ellen asked, "They're outside waiting, and Andrea [a new member of the group] is there too. I just came in for a drink, but instead, I found something better," she continued, kissing Gwen on the cheek after she finished.

"So Gwen," she asked, "Which girl is Heather?"

"The Asian one," Gwen said, deciding to forgo the traditional custom of not referring to someone's race when introducing who they are. Big mistake.

"Asian! Where!" They heard Tara yell from the bar. She then reached down and looked like she was grabbing some kind of gun.

"It's okay, Tara," Lindsay said, "Don't worry about it."

"Jesus Christ, how has she not gotten fired?" Heather asked.

"Your guess is as good as mine," Gwen replied.

"She wasn't nearly this bad the last time I was here," Duncan said, "I wonder what her deal is."

"Paging Ned Flanders," Bridgette added.

"What?"

"Nevermind."

"Anyways, Heather," Ellen said, "I heard about you and Gwen. Personally, I think the two of you would make a really great couple."

"Um… we're just friends… with benefits…" Heather answered awkwardly, "Really awesome benefits, but still… and how did you even know about us?"

"Skype," Gwen said, "Ellen and I had been talking a lot on Skype since our last, ahem, encounter."

"I heard about Geoff too," Ellen said, "How's he treating you?"

"He's OK, I guess…" Gwen said.

"That's wonderful. Anyways, the girls and I are going back to Cassie's place," Ellen moved off of Gwen's chair and wrapped her arms around both Gwen and Heather, "Why don't the two of you come with us?"

"No way!" Courtney finally spoke up, "We came here as a group of 6 and I'm not going to let a third of the group leave like that."

"Really Courtney?" Heather asked, "Because you were cool with it last time. Besides, last time I checked, you're not Gwen's or my mother, so just let us do what we're gonna do, and back the fuck off."

"I'm not the mom, I'm the leader," Courtney said, "And I say we can't just have part of our group ditch us."

"The leader?" Heather asked, "This isn't a gang Courtney, we're just a bunch of girls hanging out together."

"What is it with girls and always feeling the need to have an alpha bitch?" Duncan asked.

"I know, right?" Ellen said.

"Anyways Courtney," Duncan said, "Just let them go. We've been here for at least 2 hours anyways, them leaving now isn't going to hurt anyone."

"You know what, fine," Courtney said, "But only because Duncan's cool with it."

"YAY!" Ellen yelled, and put her arm around the two FWBs as they walked out of the bar. However, just as they were about to leave, Ellen turned around and asked, "Can the blondie come with us too?"

"Which blondie?" Courtney asked.

"The one who's eyebrows match her hair." Ellen said. She ran over to where Bridgette was sitting, and asked, "Can you please come with us, please?" basically as if she were a little kid, except with the sexual undertones.

"Um… sure, why not?" Bridgette said. Ellen squealed and dragged her, along with Heather and Gwen, to the bikes, where they, along with Ellen's biker gang, took off and rode away from the bar. Courtney growled, but said nothing, realizing it was a hopeless case.

"My eyebrows match my hair," Lindsay complained.

"Actually, no they don't." Courtney replied.

"Yeah they do… okay, maybe they're a little darker but they're definitely both blonde."

"Hate to break it to you Lindsay but your eyebrows are fucking black… or at the very least dark brown, certainly not blonde."

"Yes they are," Lindsay replied, with a slight panic in her voice.

"No they aren't," Courtney said.

"I'll be the judge of this one," Duncan replied, "They definitely aren't."

"Aw…" Lindsay said.

"Seriously, how did you not notice this?" Duncan asked.

"I did. I was just hoping nobody else would notice."

"Everyone notices. And nobody cares."

"Well I know that." Lindsay said, "I'm not that shallow."

"I don't think your shallow at all," Duncan said.

"Thanks," Lindsay said with a smile. Courtney gave Duncan a really strange look, as if she thought he had momentarily been replaced with an android from Neptune who was secretly in league with Cthulu and was coming to destroy humanity but first wanted a nice cold glass of human booze… yes, it was honestly that strange.

"I know your kinda tipsy," Courtney said, "But that still doesn't explain you actually being genuinely nice."

"I'm not such a bad guy, y'know," Duncan said.

At that moment, Tara ran up to the trio, and apparently had something important to say.

"Hey girls," Tara said, "My car kinda got towed, do you think you guys could drive me home."

"Of course you can," Lindsay said.

"Wait what?"

"I said of course you can," Lindsay said, growling at Courtney.

"Alright, fine," Courtney said, "I guess I just can't win anything today."

When the trio finally left the bar, they looked in the parking lot and saw…

"Where's the car?" Duncan asked frantically, "WHERE'S THE FUCKING CAR!"

"Duncan, calm down," Lindsay said, "I'm sure we'll-"

"Sorry girls," they heard Tara yell, and then saw Duncan's car pull up in front of them, "I decided to take it for a test spin."

Duncan checked his pockets immediately after that, "How did you get my car keys?" He asked.

"Magic," Tara replied, "Now c'mon girls, I gotta get home."

"Okay, why do you keep doing that?" Duncan asked.

"Doing what?"

"Calling the three of us as 'girls.' I may not be an expert on anatomy, but I'm pretty sure I'm a guy. And thinking back on it, I'm pretty sure Ellen did it once too. God, what is with you people, I'm a motherfucking dude!"

"Could've fooled me," Tara said.

"You want me to prove it then?" Duncan asked.

"Go right ahead."

Duncan then immediately dropped his pants, because apparently showing his penis is necessary to prove his gender.

"Wow…" Tara said, "So that's why people call you Big Duncan."

"No one ever calls me that," Duncan replied.

"Well now I do. You are now Big Duncan, y'know, because you have a really big dick… so, what do you say we go back to my place and…"

"I already got a girlfriend, sorry," Duncan said, "So it's not happening, unless…"

"Nope," Courtney replied, knowing what he was going to say in advance.

"She's your girlfriend?" Tara asked.

"Yes," Duncan replied.

"I see…" Tara said, before adding 'niggerfucker' under her breath.

"Just be happy we're driving you're sorry ass home," Courtney said.

"I'll be taking my car keys back, thank you," Duncan said, pulling up his pants as he climbed into the driver's seat, with Courtney in the shotgun, leaving Tara and Lindsay in the back. Courtney then quickly kissed Duncan on the cheek, most likely as a combined way of her showing affection and pissing Tara off at the same time.

"Aw, you two make such a sweet couple." A mysterious, female voice said. They looked around and saw no one, until Duncan saw a twenty-something girl leaning up against Duncan's window.

"Um… and you are?" Duncan asked.

"Name's Cindy Chandler," she said, "Just a casual observer."

"Right…" Duncan said, and drove off, leaving Cindy standing there, looking at the van with a glazed look in her eyes.

At Cassie's House

Gwen was sitting on the balcony, merely observing the night. It's not that she didn't enjoy that particular night, or that she hated her life in total (although considering what she's been through, she'd have more than ample reason to do so,) but it was just… something didn't feel right at this very moment. She sat there, pondering to try and figure out what exactly was causing her problems, when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Hi," Heather said, "Mind if I sit here with you?"

"Sure," Gwen said, "I got nothing better to do."

Ah, Heather. For a long time, Gwen had been wondering whether or not she thought of this girl as a close friend and a fuck buddy, or if there really was something more between them. At this point, it had been mostly decided for her, she wasn't sure if she was in love with Heather or anything, but there was definitely something there. Now all that was needed was for Gwen to ask her out… which she had continuously chickened out from. She knew Heather was bisexual, like her (obviously), and she was also pretty sure Heather had some kind of feelings for her, but the question was whether or not Heather was comfortably with a relationship upgrade.

"Star gazing?" Heather asked, interrupting Gwen's train of thought.

"Yeah," Gwen said.

"So… how did you feel about tonight?"

"It was alright, I guess. It was kinda fun, but…"

"But… what?"

"To be honest, I'm starting to think sex is meaningless without love."

"Oh…" Heather said. She knew that for her, this was either really good or really bad.

"Listen Heather, there's something you should probably know," Gwen said.

Well, this is interesting, Heather thought, I hope she's going where I think she's going. Despite this, she decided to let Gwen speak.

"I… I like you. Well, you know that, but I mean I really like you. Um… what I'm trying to say is that…"

Heather cut Gwen off in the middle off her sentence with a kiss. She knew exactly where Gwen was going, and there was nothing at this point that Heather could say that could convey how she felt better than a kiss.

"So…" Gwen started.

"Yeah…" Heather said.

The two cuddled in each other's arms, and watched the stars go by together. This time, Gwen managed to finish what she was starting to say earlier.

"So… are we official now?"

"Well, of course," Heather said, "Isn't that what the last 5 minutes were essentially about."

"Just making sure," Gwen said, "To be honest though, I'm a little worried."

"About what?"

"Well, if we're going to go public… we are going public, right?"

"If you want to," Heather said.

Gwen thought for a moment, and then said, "Y'know what, yeah, I'm pretty nervous to see the reaction from certain people at our school, but if we're not going to be open about our relationship, than it's really no different than what we had before. So yeah, we have to go public. But I'm still really fucking nervous about… well, some people in our school are really judgemental."

"I know," Heather said, "And we can deal with them later. But for now, as long as we have each other… that's enough for me."

The girls smiled and their lips met in another kiss, which was interrupted by a familiar voice.

"Excuse me," she said, and they turned around to see Ellen standing behind them.

"So… you two are finally a couple?"

"Yup," Gwen said.

"HOORAY!" Ellen shouted, momentarily forgetting that there were 4 people sleeping in this house, "You two are going to be the best couple ever!" She shrieked. She then took a look at her cell phone, "Well, it's midnight now." She said.

Heather then punched Gwen in the arm.

"Ow, what was that for?" She asked.

"Happy Sweet 16," Heather said.

Gwen facepalmed so hard her hand nearly went through her forehead, "Somehow I forgot my own birthday… wow; I'm an idiot."

Heather kissed Gwen once again, "Hey, we all do pretty dumbass things sometimes." She said, "But once again, as long as we have each other right now, it really doesn't matter."

"Aw…" Ellen said, adding a smile at the end, "So… how are you gonna break the news to Geoff?"

A/N: Alright everyone, that's Chapter 37 for you. I apologize for taking so long, but I've been really stressed this past month. I promise the waiting time for Chapter 38 will be shorter, but in the meantime, I have a few things I should probably announce.

1. If you're going to post suggestions, please stop posting them in the reviews section. Please instead send me a PM. I have no problems with suggestions, and I love communicating with my (very small) audience, but it's entirely possibly I'll take your suggestion, or I already had an idea that was similar or identical to that, and I don't want the potential plot twist spoiled for everyone. Any other kind of reviews are, as always, appreciated.

2. "Cheer up Emo Girl" now has a TV Tropes page. For those of you who don't know what TV tropes is, it's an awesome website and… well, go check it out for yourself. But seriously, go to this fanfics TV Tropes page, edit it, fix it, stick your dick inside it, whatever you want to do. I'm just letting you know it exists, especially if there are any of you guys who are tropers.

3. Izzy can break the fourth wall (as well as tear it down, resurface on the other side, than go back in the story.) It's because she's Izzy… just go with it.

Also, for anyone who was wondering, Ellen's personality was very loosely based on Pinkie Pie from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic… well, if Pinkie Pie was a hormonally charged lesbian biker. The more you know, I suppose.