Another week had passed since the Equinox Festival, or at least Korra thought it had been a week, she was used to the months of perpetual night but she had been avoiding counting the days because she knew it would soon be time to go back to the city. Not that she didn't want to go back, she did miss her life there, she was getting a little cabin fevered in parents' home and she did want some action, she was definitely not suited to such a rural domestic lifestyle, but at the same time she just hated the idea that she wouldn't able to be with Noatak at all hours of the day without having to hide.
"What's on your mind?" Noatak's voice broke through her lazy and slightly depressed thoughts.
They were lying naked together under the many covers of her bedding after another highly satisfying intimate replay of their night after the festival, or perhaps replay wasn't the accurate word since their actions seemed to always play out differently but always with equal gratification. They were spooned together with her back to his chest and his arms around her and Korra had been distracted tracing little patterns on the marred skin of his arm.
"Hm? Nothing." She tilted her head back to smile at him sleepily.
"Liar." Noatak's tone was kind and he leaned to kiss her lips softly.
"I just don't want this to end." Korra kissed back before relaxing into his chest again.
"I understand." Of course he did, he had been thinking the exact same thing.
"I know." Korra repressed the urge to sigh.
"Whatever happened to the Korra that only lived in the moment?" Noatak traced up her hip and waist, it wasn't a sensual touch in the least, just a tender caress.
"Good point." Korra grinned at him and luckily she was still basking in the afterglow of amazing sex so her mood was pacified quickly.
His hands still traced delicately up and down her skin but he remained silent. In the past week things had been more relaxed and easygoing; their nocturnal exploits relieved much of the tension of their accumulated worries and the comfortable routine they had fallen into continued after the festival; in fact, Korra seemed to actually be retaining some of the information her mother passed on to her and Noatak finally felt well enough at ease with Tonraq to have slightly more personal discussions with him without feeling that he might be risking too much information. Korra's dreams and bouts of sickness were still a severe problem but in past few days she didn't seem to be able to recall any nightmarish details and Pema's tea was still working wonders, although her supply was dwindling.
However, despite the contentment of the last few days and the way all their conversations had become light hearted, the truth was that they had both been ignoring the imminent time of departure and Noatak had the strange feeling that once they returned to the city, this life, this fraction of peace they had experienced in the South Pole, would become a distant dream and he didn't want that to happen.
"You're dying to do it, aren't you?" Korra snapped at him playfully after many long minutes of silent contemplation.
"Do what exactly, Korra?" He looked at her, not quite sure what she was referring to since there were several things that fit the category.
"Noatak, you're not petting my skin like that because I'm a cat." Despite the sarcasm she shot him a look that stated she had seen right through him. "You want to sense it, don't you?"
"I see you are becoming good at reading me. I'm not accustomed to that."
He really wasn't used to have anybody know him intimately enough to see through him and if it were any other person it would have been unnerving but with Korra it was a comforting thing. She was right, though, he really had wanted to use his cursed skills to sense the little life in her body, both out of some sort of addicted urge as well as a newly born protective instinct that kept making him want to follow every little change, but he had been reluctant to use bloodbending even to sense ever since he had confessed to Korra how he did it.
"You can, you know?" Korra turned her head again to look at him with earnest eyes.
"You're willing even though you know how I do it?" He gazed at her with curiosity.
"I was kinda pissed off at first, I know." Korra rolled her eyes a little, more at her own attitude than at his. "But, well, I know that ability is terrible and all but you're not doing any harm and…"
"And?" Now he really wanted to know what was on her mind that was actually making her excuse bloodbending.
"And it's reassuring. I feel useless sometimes because I can't use water-healing to sense like Katara does, I can't use any earthbending vibration techniques and even if I could it wouldn't be possible on myself and I can't use your skill either so I feel ignorant of what's happening in my own body." She paused to gather her thoughts and Noatak noticed she had begun avoiding the word bloodbending.
"So you feel reassured when I sense and tell you exactly what is going on. You feel a certain degree of protective instinct that makes you want to know what is happening if you can." It wasn't a question, Noatak was merely completing her speech with what he felt himself.
"How did you even know that?" Korra's brows were pinched in confusion.
"We share the same opinion on this matter, Korra." He kissed her brow to dispel the confused expression from her face.
"Oh." Understanding dawned on her. "Ok then, you can sense whenever you want just make sure that's all you do." There was a sharp tone of warning in her voice.
"Thank you, Korra, but there was really no need for the warning. I already swore I wouldn't do such a thing." Noatak traced up to her waist again as he looked at her thoughtfully. "A pity we didn't discuss this on the night of the Equinox…the full moon would have helped."
"Well we were a little busy at the time." Korra chuckled back to her original good mood.
"That we were." Noatak allowed his hand to glide unobtrusively over her flat abdomen now that he had her permission.
It was an odd sensation, not the blood-sensing but the sensation of openly being allowed to use the ability for a positive means in full complicity with Korra. It was odd but pleasant- for the first time in his life he didn't feel like that part of his heritage was dragging him down into darkness; he couldn't say he had never believed he was putting it to good use because back when he was Amon and spent days equalizing benders he had believed he was using his ability for a positive purpose, he had believed all those years of torture at his father's hands hadn't been for nothing and he had believed that his greatest talent hadn't been a curse but back then he was always met with resistance, pain, fear and all the negative feelings that were projected onto him by his victims and his own lies, not even the power it gave him could quite wash away the ugliness of it all. Whereas now there was no negative emotion, quite the contrary, it was all about awe, affection, protection and care, and that was as much a cathartic personal experience as all those weeks back in the cave had been.
Noatak was careful, very cautiously so, as he focused on the task at hand and Korra was quiet enough to let him concentrate, though he could feel her already rapid heartbeat jump hastily with anticipation.
"So? Any differences?" Korra's impatient voice was soft but demanding as she looked at his face rather than his hands on her body, trying to read his thoughts in his calm expression.
"Plenty." Noatak replied giving her some attention.
"Well? Tell me already." Korra had that determined and stubborn little frown he knew so well.
"Alright." He began to speak, once again, with the usually tone of a speech. "Firstly, it seems to have doubled in size."
"Already?" Korra interrupted, holding up her hands at a distance a little over three inches. "Like this?"
"Yes, more or less." Noatak nodded, not bothered by the interruption. "However, that is not the most unique change. The circulatory system leads me to believe the shape has become more complex and well defined. It also seems to be influencing your blood flow, rushing it even."
"What about a heartbeat?" That question had been burning in Korra's tongue since the very second he had laid his hand on her skin.
"Yes, that has become easy to sense." Noatak's voice seemed falter ever so slightly and dropped a notch in volume. "It's also moving. Not much, just miniscule spontaneous movements."
"…Oh." Korra was wrapped up in her on awe-induced silence that she didn't even notice his solemn reactions. The news had stunned her much more than she had expected it would simply because it was a very big change for so little time and the fact that her baby actually moved inside her was like an ice cold bucket of reality.
"Yes." Noatak agreed in a quiet voice. He was as stunned as her and wordless as well, the humble little heartbeat had been enough to choke him with emotion although he kept his face as an unreadable mask. It finally actually felt like he was sensing a real little human inside Korra and it caused him to experience the same world-shattering sense of reality that she was feeling.
At last Noatak removed his hand from her abdomen and simply wrapped both arms around Korra's body as they lay pressed together under the pile of blankets in comfortable silence, it was probably very late but they couldn't sleep and simply dwelled in their own thoughts sharing body heat and their quiet unchangeable support for each other.
"Do you ever think of how much we've change since the war?" Korra whispered with a seriousness that was rare for her personality.
"All the time, Korra." Noatak replied softly and kissed her neck- it felt like a thank you to her, as if the changes she was talking about had been a blessing she had given him rather than a complex gigantic web of painful memories, bittersweet revelations and blooming affections.
Instead of speaking further, Korra used firebending to extinguish the light of their oil lamp and she rolled to face him in the dark, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him with uncharacteristic softness.
~~~~~~.:oOo:.~~~~~~
The last leisurely day at the home of Korra's parents was one where Noatak and Korra were left wholly to their own devices, so they decided to do something that they had been postponing for quite some time.
They spent the morning with last minute preparations for their departure and when Noatak was fully satisfied by their plans he acquiesced to the Avatar's request and as a result after lunch they set out to an isolated plane in the tundra and faced each other under the stars, after Korra had lit a large fire since the sliver of waning moon was hardly enough to light their dark polar day.
"Are you sure you agree to this?" Korra asked him skeptically as she finished setting up the fire and turned to face him with her boots crunching in the snow.
"I should be the one to ask, Korra." Noatak's voice gave nothing away from under the dark mask. "I don't think it would be fair given your condition."
"That has nothing to do with it." Korra crossed her arms stubbornly. "I want this."
"Very well then." Noatak nodded quietly.
"No bloodbending though." Korra chided.
"Of course, Korra." He seemed offended by the suggestion, almost alarmed that she would consider it.
"And no chi-blocking." She added, ignoring, or perhaps oblivious of, his offended tone.
"In that case you cannot use any element other than water either." Noatak was standing in his usual straight stance, his hands clasped behind his back.
"Deal." Korra immediately took her own fighting stance.
Once upon a time, back in a teal encrusted cave, the Avatar had suggested something akin of a spar or practice between waterbenders and once upon a time, a man with a borrowed name had agreed to the suggestion. Now was time to realize the promise.
Noatak was not comfortable the idea at all. He did want to face Korra, the Avatar, the strongest, and the chance to test her and his own limits was incredibly tempting but now that she was pregnant he found himself very reluctant to go all out; he had even gone as far as suggest they reschedule the match indefinitely but Korra wouldn't have it. She wanted a semblance of her old life back, she had some demons to chase and she didn't know if they would ever again have some time alone in a more favorable spot for a waterbending battle, after all the entire landscape was their weapon in this isolated unseen place and the thought of testing her skills with the man who she had merely bested out of a fluke was sounding more and more appealing by the minute, she figured if she could defeat Noatak, she could handle anyone.
Korra cracked her knuckles and watched him but Noatak gave no intention moving. It was part of his personal style on a face-to-face match to never make the first move- waiting for the opponent was generally the best play, it allowed him to conserve energy and restrict the amount of useless moves simply by making minute adjustments to his stance when the blows came; without bloodbending it was more convenient to redirect an attack to use an enemy's strength against them rather than wasting a predictable move on an expert like Korra. It also helped that wearing the down the opponent's patience made them sloppy, and Noatak knew very well that the Avatar was anything but patient.
She began circling him slowly but he still had no intention of moving and it was pissing her off. Suddenly Korra lunged at him, fists raised as the snow around her feet swirled into water and wrapped around her hands just before she threw the first punch. Noatak dodged effortlessly by simply stepping out of the way forcing Korra to twist her body at the last minute for balance before she bent an enormous splash of water straight to the mask which he dodged as well, before raising his hands for the first time and rerouting the liquid straight at her.
She rolled out of the way of the redirected attack and manipulated more snow into double water whips, cracking them at Noatak from multiple directions to steal away the chance of dodging, but Noatak simple raised a barrier of ice to deflect the attacks.
"Is that really the best you can do, Avatar?" He prodded at her pride easily.
"I'm only just getting started." Korra's determined expression was back.
She took a stance and raised her arms but was too slow to bend and in moments he had knocked her down with a group of carefully aimed snowballs, of course if they had been ice spikes she might have gotten severely hurt but so far he saw no need to really step up that much.
"Hey! This isn't a game." Korra got up sputtering snow and growled in annoyance.
"It worked, did it not?" Noatak moved slowly closer to her. "You are too slow. I am unimpressed."
"I'm not slow, I didn't doge because you used damn snowballs! That's not a threat." Korra was circling him again, attempting to secretly bend the snow around him to immobilize him.
"It pushed you down, didn't it? What if I used spikes?" Noatak watched her carefully. "And by the way, trying to bend the snow under my feet is unlikely to work."
He jumped, moving away in time to avoid the sudden grappling tentacles of water from beneath him, but Korra was ready this time and as soon as he landed the ice around him tilted as Korra attacked, planting a round house kick to his chest to propel a jet of water onto his body.
Noatak wasn't able to avoid the kick itself but was able to back flip elegantly over the powerful jet of water and move out of the way of the next one as he skidded back.
"Better." He approved as he moves became faster and she began to correlate techniques rather than using one thing at the time. "But still not good enough, Snowflake."
"Shut up! I'm the Avatar, I'm the best!" Korra was riled and used multiple long distance punches to bend several projectile blobs of water in his direction. She had actually adapted the move from a firebending technique but it seemed to working in her favor and forcing Noatak to run and escape while attempting to deflect rapid balls of water in record time.
"Make me, Korra." Noatak didn't usually resort to such childish taunts but he had discovered that they were somewhat of a weakness of Korra's so he used it to his advantage as anger made her faster but less accurate.
"Why won't you just attack already?!" Korra yelled and grappled the air, bending a curving bar water before executing a sweep with her feet that froze said bar and hurdled it straight at him.
The frozen slab was far too long and wide to dodge so easily but her aim was off enough that he managed to avoid it by twisting back and low enough to move under it but there was barely time to get back up as Korra was already jumping over him, bending the snow beneath him to grab at his limbs. Noatak was forced to attack then, kicking and bending snow up to her body in nanoseconds, tilting her balance enough to that he could avoid her falling hammering punch as he bend the snow off his body and rolled out of the way. Perhaps an angry Korra, even a sloppy one, might be a little too dangerous to handle.
As her punch landed on the ground rather than on target Korra used the position to move her legs, kicking a wave of water into his body and back flipping to avoid exposing her back, but Noatak was faster and dodged again, predicting her move and her landing so that he could position himself behind her and pin her arms back with ice manacles.
The surprise restraint caught Korra off guard but she yelled belligerently and broke free with sheer brute force. She then attacked with violent frustration using a set of rapid flicks and waves of her arms to hail icicles over his body, forcing Noatak to deflect with a water shield but holding the shield left him exposed enough for direct contact attacks and Korra took full advantage of the opening to go for his gut.
It wasn't as successful as she had expected since Noatak bent the shield at the last possible second to wrap it around her and fling her out of the way before her attack could inflict its full damage.
"It would have been smarter to use a direct move to the back or kidneys, Avatar." Noatak seemed very entertained but she had him slightly winded from the gut blow.
"That's dishonorable fighting." Korra replied as she bent ice slabs and flung him towards him in a move she had stolen from earthbending.
"No, it's intelligent fighting." Noatak grabbed the slabs and redirected them in her direction, giving him time to move out of the way.
He highlighted his point by bending a massive wave of snow behind her; it crashed right onto Korra before she had time to decide which way to run. Seconds later she was erupting from the snow in a column of water and lunging for him again with water blades that Noatak avoid with amazing skill before taking advantage of her proximity to grab her hand and pull her off the water column in an attempt to immobilize her on the ground with her arm twisted behind her back.
Korra wouldn't go down that easily though and used a simply sweep to his knees to make him loose balance and loosen his grip enough that she escaped. They soon stood again, both slightly winded and looking for an opening.
Noatak had to admit that after so long depending on bloodbending to deflect attacks and subdue opponents, it was hard to defeat Korra just with waterbending; he could easily dodge her, tire her down and even match her strength but in order to actually win he needed something more, he needed strategy and opportunity; someone as impulsive and brutal as Korra should have been wide open and yet she was skilled and left very little openings even when her moves were predictable.
On Korra's end, she found that defeating Noatak was much harder than she had first expected. She had slipped into a false sense of security by assuming bloodbending was his best ability and she assumed that if he was anything like Tarrlok then she could take whatever he could dish out but now that she was faced with his level of waterbending expertise, Korra discovered that she was more than just evenly matched, she was in danger of tiring herself out before she even landed a conclusive blow.
They stared at each other, both strung with tension. Korra was panting slightly and hiding a aching shoulder while Noatak was attempting to mask a slash to his thigh and the pain in his bruised chest. The Avatar was not holding back but she obviously had drawbacks in her condition, on the other hand Noatak was attempting to win but was holding back out of concern for her safety and that hindered what could have otherwise been a very quick battle.
At last Korra moved. She spun, bending as much snow into water as she could manage until they were surrounded by a tsunami of liquid danger, walled so high that just holding it up was a massive strain but Korra snickered despite the sweat on her brow.
"Are you insane?" Noatak's voice held more worry over the effort she was making than over the precipitous wave that threatened to swallow them whole.
Rather than replying, Korra crashed the powerful unrestrained force of the water right onto them and lunged to him, both of them using bending to protect what little air they could around their bodies as they were swept away by the uncontrollable stream while aiming subaquatic blows at each other at high speed and with so much power that whenever their blows met there was a crash louder than thunder and gigantic splashes of icy water became frozen spikes that were used as leverage so they could rise from under the water and continue the charge.
By the time the tidal wave Korra had invoked was washed away, there was a monumentally huge and complex growth of ice spikes and splashes marring the landscape almost like an otherworldly piece of giant crafted art and by the sheer size of the thing it might not melt away for long, long time in the temperatures of the South Pole.
They were both soaked and openly panting as they moved away from the strange structure they had accidentally conjured up. Korra was exhausted but still looking for an opening to get him and she ignored the strange mass of ice they had made although it was taller than the statue at Avatar Aang Memorial, wide enough to fill half of Air Temple Island and was glittering with reflected light from the stars making it incredibly eye-catching. Noatak glanced at it and was glad for the mask that hid his shock, he knew full well that the 'construction' had mostly been Korra's work as he had been mainly deflecting her power and was nowhere near good enough to bend something that massive, it awed him to see the level of the Avatar's waterbending power though by pride he wasn't going to reveal how much it shocked him any time soon.
Korra lunged at him one last time trying to catch him from above with hail of snowballs while she bent spikes from beneath him but she was slowing and predictable which allowed Noatak to deflect the balls onto her and use a spike as a foothold to gracefully move away as Korra landed roughly on the snow to his left.
Noatak then decided to end the fight and attempted to disable her again by bending the snow beneath her much more deeply than she had so far tried on him- it caused Korra to sink waist deep into the snow in less than a second before he bent an intricate ice cage all around her, so tightly that she could not move to bend.
Korra struggled and tried to bend the cage away with what little room she had but Noatak was focused on keeping the structure solidly in place so she tried breaking it with brute force, but still didn't have enough room to gain momentum so she was effectively trapped. Luckily the water half her body was immersed in in wasn't freezing since she could use firebending to keep it warm without breaking any of the agreed rules.
"I think this is my win?" Noatak crouched down to her level.
"It's not a win! You have me trapped but in a real fight you wouldn't be able to do anything further to actually beat me!" Korra sulked with her arms crossed.
"Perhaps, but I could wear you out in there or use water blades or ice spikes while you are immobilized." Noatak was trying to be logical but it was all a lie- the amount of focus it took to keep her from destroying the cage made bending any other attack into it impossible and there was no way he could wear her down since the skill required to keep up the trap for any lengthy period of time would wear him down as well.
"Fine. I surrender!" Korra was annoyed and tried to throw her arms in the air with exasperation but had no room to do so.
"Good." Noatak melted away the cage and helped her out of the sinkhole before taking the initiative to bend all the water out of her clothing. Since she was grumbling with annoyance he decided to ease her. "Take comfort in knowing that in a real fight I would be no match for you with all the other elements at your disposal."
"Yeah right, until you wiped out the paralyzing bloodbending." Korra still had a deep sulky frown.
"I will never use such an ability on you, Korra, I swore that already, remember? Hence why I'd be no match for you." Noatak was completely earnest. He couldn't promise never to bloodbend again but he could swear on his life he would never use it against her.
"What about chi-blocking?" Korra seemed slightly mollified but still frustrated as they began walking away from the mushy sodden battlefield.
"Maybe I could use it to win but it would require a very good sense of timing." Noatak shrugged lightly and bent the ice off his own clothing too since the water was already frozen solid in sub-zero temperatures of the perpetual night.
"I'll get you next time." Korra poked at his chest with stubborn resilience but her angry mood was quickly changing into something more positive.
"I'll be waiting." Noatak had no doubt she fully intended to make do on that promise.
She surprised him by suddenly pushing him onto the snow on his back as she plopped herself down next to him in a similar position, looking up at the star dusted sky with freckles of light mirrored in her eyes. The huge fire she had lit was far away from them and fading into the darkness as the huge structure resultant from their duel cast reflected beams of starlight onto the landscape. Korra's gloved hand found his and wrapped around it tightly.
Noatak looked at her from behind the mask. He could feel the freezing cold of the snow seeping into his clothing as they lay there but he didn't want to move and even squeezed her hand in return, more out of instinct than anything else as he admired a still slightly breathless Korra with her dark hair all over the snow as she stared up at the starry sky.
"Let's do this again someday." Korra broke the silence and turned her head to face him with a grin. "Let's come back here next year and do this again."
"That sounds like an appealing proposition." Noatak nodded behind the mask.
"Promise?" Korra seemed eager like a kid again.
"Yes. In a year, on this same spot, let us raise an even more monumental monolith and see who has the upper hand." He beckoned towards the massive and strangely beautiful thing that they had accidentally created in mock violence.
"I'll remember that." She warned with a happy smile.
"I know." Noatak stood and offered her a hand.
Korra took it and allowed him to help her up as she stretched lazily. They were both cold and somewhat sore but they were in high spirits and not even the reality that they had to leave the following day was enough to ruin the moment.
"Let's go back." Korra pointed in the direction of the little village where her parents lived.
"Yes." Noatak agreed but surveyed her carefully. "Are you alright?" He could see that she seemed fine but he still worried after the strenuous physical exertion.
"I'm fine, Noatak. Just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean I'm any less tough." Korra laughed with every ounce of rebellion in her body.
"That much you have made abundantly obvious." He rolled his eyes, glad that she probably couldn't see the expression due to the mask and the darkness of the moonlit day.
Suddenly Korra smashed a snowball into his mask, causing mushy ice to slide in through the eye holes and forcing him to remove it in order to wipe away the slush. She was still laughing but surprised him further by leaning close and planting a kiss on his unmasked lips.
"Race you back." With that she took off running, hurdling snowballs on the way merely to provoke him.
"Cheater." He called out after her with amusement but slid the mask into place and began running.
He felt like the teenager he had never been allowed to be and, once again, it was all because her. As he redirected her snowballs back and caught up to her speed, he decided that at least for that moment it was ok to be this way, it was alright to be open and young and carefree so long as it was for Korra. After they returned he would be have to be himself again but for these last few hours he would just be the Noatak that could play freely with her.
Their race ended in a deliberate draw.
~~~~~~.:oOo:.~~~~~~
(Author's Note: My friend asked me if there was anything supporting my idea that Noatak's mom was of Yagoda's family. My answer- yes, I do suspect that Yakone's wife was related to Yagoda. Why? Physical similarities, same hairstyle, there was a northern tribe girl with a similar face and hair in Yagoda's healing class in A:TLA, etc. It just feel it's too much resemblance to be coincidence.
Also, the fact that Noatak is useless at healing is something I took from the name of his ability (死手 in the art of 點脈) which roughly means "the death hand" and refers to a person who is skilled in killing but not curing.)