Bass held Charlie firmly in his arms. The people that had gathered in the street next to the little alley were looking at him, looking at Charlie and he just wanted to scream at all of them to get the hell out of his way. The only thing he wanted was to get Charlie of the street right now and hold her close.
Pure rage and adrenaline was still pumping though his veins, his muscles were tense and his heartbeat still high. Rage for the fact that Neville had dared to hurt Charlie. Rage for having to watch her in front of his gun. Rage for the fact he was not able to keep her away from him. Rage for Charlie having to go through this again.
He watched Charlie, the weight of her body in his arms, her body against his chest. She had closed her eyes and was holding on to her belly. She was so pale and when she had collapsed his heart had almost stopped.
Neville was gone. It was over. He cursed at himself again for letting it happen. One of his arms was under her knee, the other held her body close to his chest. His jaws were locked, his eyes wide and dark blue. He had almost lost her. He had almost lost them both. He looked down at her. All he wanted to do was take her home, close the fucking door behind them and feel her warmth against his body,.
When he walked into his apartment, he felt how Charlie started to breathe more heavily, panic in her eyes. Her face and eyes filled with so much pain.
He walked straight to the couch and put her gently on it.
And then she started to cry, the tears clouding her blue eyes and sobs were raging through her body. tears were hitting his underarms when he held her face.
'Charlie, listen to me. It is over, you are safe. It is over.' Fuck, he wished he could take all of her pain and hurt away. Now. He could not stand the look of her on his couch, crying, broken, cold.
'I am sorry. I am so sorry.' She kept on whispering. She was rocking her body in front of him, her hands close to her belly in a protective way. She looked at her belly and kept on repeating those same words.
'Baby, stop. This is not your fault, please Charlie...' His voice was breaking while he desperately tried to reach her, 'Charlie, please look at me.'
She lifted her head, and her eyes finally found his. First, it looked like she was looking straight through him. But then, he could see it behind her tears. She came back to him. Charlie came back to him and it was like she slowly got out of the shock that had locked her inside of pain and tears and guilt.
'This is not your fault.' His eyes were gentle, his voice low and soft.
Charlie looked into his eyes and felt like the grip around her, was finally letting her go. She slowly reached out her hands for his in a slow and weak way, her hands shaking. She only had to move them a little bit, before Bass reached over her. He pulled her close, and lifted her in his arms. He joined her on the couch and wrapped his body all around her.
'I love you. I love you.' His voice was hoarse, tears in his words. He held onto her, rocked her slowly in his arms, 'You are safe now, I will never let anybody touch you again Charlie.'
She could her the rage behind those words.
'I'm sorry I wasn't there Charlie, just like I wasn't there the day that asshole shoved his gun in your face, I am so..' Charlie saw the harsh lines appear in his face, felt his body almost tremble beside her.
'Bass, stop. Don't.' Her voice was soft in the crook of his neck. She knew about his guilt, guilt about the day he had ended up in that conversation with her mom, instead of looking out for her. She also knew that if this man beside her, felt guilt, it consumed him from the inside. She knew he was sorry. He did not have to say it again.
'Just hold me Bass, please.' She grabbed his shirt and her warm breath was assuring in his neck. He placed a hand over hers, both of their hands covering her belly now.
'Anything I can do?' Miles asked, worry in his dark eyes. He had made sure that Neville was buried far away behind town walls, a nameless grave, unmarked. He would never Charlie or Bass where they had buried him. That chapter was now done. When all that mess was behind them, he had walked over to Bass' place as fast as he could.
He found the both of them in Bass' apartment. Her head was resting on the side of the couch, Bass was grabbing a glass of water for her in the kitchen.
Miles knew she had been crying, he knew his brother had been crying.
He watched Bass swallow with difficulty. And crap, that was never a good sign.
'I need Jo Keller to get over here now.' It was almost a desperate order.
'Wait Keller? The midwife?' Miles voices just raised in a dangerously way. He looked at Charlie, tears drying on her cheeks and he took a deep breath and tried not to yell when he spoke again. The girl didn't need a ranting uncle now.
'Is she...?' Miles asked with shock in his eyes, seeing the tears build up in his brothers eyes again.
Bass nodded at him, tears blurring his vision, his voice broken and low when he was able to form the answer into words.'She is pregnant man.'
Miles was standing across from Bass. He put his hands through his hair. He considered yelling at Bass for knocking up his niece. Putting a fist in his face. Yell some more.
But he had seen the way Charlie had moved his hands over her stomach when she stood in front of Neville, he had seen how much the idea of losing her and this new kid on the way had ripped apart Bass.
The pain written all over his damn face now, the way he took care of her. He knew Bass would give his damn life for Charlie. So he considered yelling but instead he looked at Bass.
Bass knew hell was about to break lose now Miles knew, he just didn't know how to take any more shit today.
But he watched Miles as he just took a step forward and slung his arm over Bass shoulder before he pulled him close far a fast embrace between brothers.
Then he stepped back. 'You stay with her, I will get Keller.' And with that, Miles was out of the door.
Miles returned with Jo soon after, the woman's energy calm. 'Well now Charlie,' she sat down next to her and Bass, 'I am going to check on you now okay? Can you take a deep breath for me?'
Jo checked on Charlie quickly, while Bass never left her side. He assured the both of them that everything looked fine, and Charlie was doing okay. What she needed now was a warm bath to get cleaned up, rest and sleep. She nodded briefly at Bass and Miles and promised to be back tomorrow and reassured them that they could always find her in her own practice if needed.
Bass felt how a shiver went through Charlie's body. he pressed a kiss against her temple. He saw the dirt of the alley on her skin and clothing. He needed her warm and out of these clothes.
'I am going to make that warm bath,' He said gently.
Charlie nodded at him, feeling more safe now that Jo had told her that she and the baby were doing fine. Feeling more safe now that Bass was close. Feeling more safe that Miles was around. Her body felt heavy and cold. Somehow, always either Miles or Bass was sitting close to her.
She did not how much time had passed but for the second time today, Bass picked her up from the couch and held her in his arms and against his chest.
'Let's get you in that tub, Charlie.' He said hoarsely.
He walked her over to the bathroom. The tub now filled with warm inviting water.
He put her on the edge of the tub, slowly removing her clothing, one piece at the time. His hands were gentle. He slowly let her glide into the water and never left her side. He softly caressed her hair before he moved his fingers over her cheek, and watched how Charlie finally relaxed, her eyes returned to the blue he loved so much.
When Charlie finally felt warm again, and the dirt was soaked from her skin and hair, Bass helped her get out of the bath again. She felt the fabric of the towel against her skin, and then Bass helped her into one of his shirts.
The shirt smelled like him and it reassured her. So tired, her eyes so heavy now. All the energy was draining from her body and her body felt heavy.
It was finally over.
She curled up deeper under a soft blanket, when she felt a large hand over her cheek. She opened her eyes and looked directly in Miles eyes.
'Hey kid, you get some sleep. Bass is here and so am I. I am going to sleep on the couch tonight.'
She saw the gentle expression in Miles eyes, and he pressed a warm kiss on her forehead.
Miles watched his niece, asleep and alive, curled up under heavy blankets. Her eyelashes on her cheeks. If he had lost her today...tears were cornering him at the thought. Anger at the thought that Tom Neville had gotten so damn close. It should have never happened. The last time it happened he had not been there for her. It still stung, knowing he had not been there and she had been there, on her own. He had yelled at Bass, he had yelled at Rachel for letting that happen when he had realised what happened that day.
She was asleep. He watched her for a moment while he gently touched her cheek. He covered her up one more time, adjusting the blankets, before he walked out of the room.
That night Charlie slept, with the knowledge that she was safe, that their child was safe and with Bass' arms around her, his body shielding her and her uncle close to them on the couch.
Neville was dead.
It was finally over.
Charlie took in a deep breath. She found herself in front of a familiar front door. She was waiting, now she had knocked on the door and there was not a way back anymore. Bass had left for work early that morning, and after tea and a slow breakfast Charlie had finally made a decision.
It had been four weeks since Neville had stood in front of her, death staring her right in the eyes. It had been four weeks since part of her nightmare had been over. She had always known Neville was out there, a dark invisible threat so close. But she had survived and she was doing fine. She was still here. She had nightmares again about Austin, about Jason. But since that night in that cold and dark bathroom, she knew she did not have to face them alone anymore.
Bass was there every time she had woken up, covered in sweat, silent tears and screams so close. He held her, rocked her in his arms and simply told her he was here.
Jo, the midwife, had checked up on her a couple of days later, and her body had protected the little baby inside of her. She was doing great, and that was something she and Bass were grateful for. They both knew they could have lost this new life on that day.
What they also were both grateful for, was the fact that Miles had not killed Bass for being the future father of her unborn child. He was his usual self, but Charlie noticed him being around just a little bit more. So now she had two guys watching over her like watch dogs.
And now, it was time for a conversation that Charlie had been pushing away for so long now. She realised that it was not only about her anymore. She had new life to protect and that meant that she had to do this. See if there was a way through. She didn't want this to end in another screaming match, she just wanted to talk. See if there was something left to repair.
Get it out of the way, so the stress and worrying about it would not hurt their unborn child anymore.
The moments before the door opened stretched out in front of her, when memories from so many moments came back to her. The good ones, the impossible ones. She had thought this through and when she had made a decision, she would stand behind that decision.
Bass had asked her not to go alone, and had mumbled something between his teeth and the mention of her name. But this was Charlie, and when she had an idea in her mind, there was no going back. Bass had realised that and had given in, knowing there was nothing to do to change her mind.
If this was important to Charlie, he would support her. But he swore, if the bitch did anything to hurt Charlie or his unborn child, he would hurt the hell out of her.
Charlie felt it deep within her, from the day Neville found her. It was a primal feeling of needing, wanting to protect. It was not only her right now anymore, not her and Bass. In the next couple of months her belly would grow, and so would their anticipation of wanting to meet this little child.
Charlie felt she at least had to try to reach some understanding, to see if there would be any kind of foundation to build on with the woman she had not talked with for weeks now.
She knew what she would do if she had to choose. She would choose Bass, she would choose for his love. She would choose her child. Their child.
Miles opened the door, and looked confused for a moment, before she could see the warmth in his dark eyes.
'Hey kid, good morning.'
'Hey,' Charlie greeted her uncle, 'Is my mom here?'
Miles nodded at her to get in.
When she walked into the kitchen, she felt Miles closely behind her. His tall presence behind her, grounded her, like he had done so many times before in so many difficult moments. In silence, he had been there for her, just like he was now.
Rachel was busy in the kitchen, when she turned around at the sound of her walking in. There was a genuine surprise on her face when her eyes met her daughter.
Miles looked at Rachel with something only Rachel got, a sharp and almost warning gaze that Charlie missed, before he silently walked out the kitchen, giving both woman room and time. He would stay around though.
So, here they were again, Charlie thought. When she had just returned with Bass to Willoughby this kitchen had been the place for so much frustration, old unspoken hurt and trying to get her mother to see where she was coming from. Echo's from their conversations from the past filled the room.
Rachel looked nervous, unsure what to do, when she leaned back into the kitchen counter.
'Hey Charlie,' her voice was unsteady when she spoke. Miles had been talking to her, had been trying to make Rachel understand that things between Charlie and Bass were real. That if she did not even tried to listen to what was important to Charlie, there was a good chance of losing her.
'Hey mom,' Charlie answered, when she took in Rachel. Her mother looked different today , the ice from her eyes was gone.
Charlie was not able to tell her mother right there how much she hoped they would still find a way. They had to, because if they didn't, Charlie would have to step back from her.
She had to, because there was still so much of her life left to live. She did not want to be caught in the past. Rachel did not know about the pregnancy, it was something Charlie did not want her mother to know right now.
Now she knew she was pregnant, she knew that extra stress could be dangerous to her and her baby. And that was something she could not afford. So she had come over here today, to try, to try and see if there could be understanding and some kind of way to be in each other's life.
'You want to sit down?' Rachel asked, when she was not able to keep the hope out of her voice that her daughter would say yes.
'No, I am fine mom, I won't stay long. I just hoped you could hear me out for a moment.'
'Sure,' Rachel nodded.
Charlie took in another breath before she started.
'Mom, I am aware of the fact that it is not easy for you to see me with Bass. I know what Bass did in that past. But just as you love Miles, and found a way to forgive him and share your life with him after everything that has happened before, I am building my life with Bass.'
Charlie's voice was firm, but she had crossed her arms protectively before her chest and her stomach when she had spoken those words.
'I love him.'
Rachel's eyes were filled with confusion and emotions, but she did stay in the kitchen, and she did listen to Charlie. Charlie saw her flinch a little bit when she told her mother about her love for Bass.
' The only thing I am asking for is a chance here, a chance for you to consider to accept and respect my choice. My choice for Bass. I know, believe me, I know, what happened in the past. I understand that things between the both of you will always be difficult. But I am asking you for a chance, to see if we can stay in each other's life.'
Rachel was silent, while she considered Charlie's words. Charlie saw her struggle. Her words had been clear. There was silence between mother and daughter, when they stood in front of each other in that kitchen.
Rachel felt each and every one of her daughters words, the certainty in them. She was stunned and was not able to form words. She had not expected Charlie here, and she had not expected her daughter to be so calm, to be so clear in her words.
'I will go now, I just hope you will think about it.?'
She waited for Rachel to nod at her, before she turned around and walked out of the small kitchen. Rachel had turned around and held the kitchen counter before her, her hands shaking.
Charlie closed the front door behind her and was fighting back tears that ambushed her all of a sudden.
Tears with that one hope, hope her mother would finally see her and hear her voice.
It was all she longed for, from the moment her moment had came back into her life in Philly. The absence of that, had caused her deep hurt her since being reunited with her mother.
She had tried to make her mother see that yes, this was about Bass, but it was about so much more.
It was about her mother seeing her for who she was. Accept her, hear her, love her.
She heard the door behind her, followed by the sound of boots on the porch steps. She turned around and Miles was standing right in front of her. He took her chin between his fingers, gently lifting her face towards his.
'You are an amazing kid, you know that right?' His voice was tender.
Charlie swallowed a lump and tears away, when she tried to fight against the tears. Miles pulled her close, her head resting against his chest, while his hand cupped the back of her head.
He told himself to get a damn grip, but when it came to Charlie he was like a puppy holding a kitten, like Bass would say so eloquently. He fought back his own tears. He knew how much Charlie still cared for Rachel, and he just hoped Rachel would finally see that she was losing Charlie if she did not even tried give this a chance.
He just wished he could get through to Rachel, make her understand that Charlie had been through enough. She had been through hell and back and was still standing here, asking her mother to be in her life, after all the crap that had happened.
'Want me to walk you home?' Miles already knew the answer, but he offered anyway.
'Nah, I am fine Miles,' she gave him her best smile through her tears, appreciating his concern, 'I just need some time.'
'All right kid, you know where to find me when you need me.'
Charlie nodded and then she slowly turned around and walked back towards the street. Miles would stand before the porch until she was out of sight.
And Charlie, she knew his was there, every step of the way home.
First of all, thank you for your very touching reviews for my Christmas story, That one Kiss. It was overwhelming to read them all! Thank you too for all the reviews for last chapter, I loved hearing from all of you. Your thoughts and reviews are always there in my head, when I start another chapter. I love hearing from you. Love from Love