Author's Note
I know everyone is in shock.That last chapter took many hours and tissues to write.I understand the hate mail and I hope you will forgive me. So you don't go on teary eyed with heavy hearts (and because it was already written) I had to put up the next chapter.
One note; I felt it important to portray Legolas differently in LMTF; one more congruent with what he was like in LOTR; a loyal, strong friend who would support someone to the end rather than abandon them just because his feelings were hurt.
Thank you, reviewers, for your comments.
AW
Gandalf looked up at the towering remains of Raven Hill from a position on the hill where he could see the three flags that fluttered over the new memorials, where swords impaled the blood soaked ice and rock. Later they would be marked by stone tablets, but not now when they were so fresh, the memory too recent.
They marked the places where the Sons of Durin fell.
"So much bloodshed…." Gandalf bemoaned, his head bent as he used his staff to walk along, his wrinkled, leathery face in a sad scowl, the pointed hat usually on his head in his hands.
"Did this turn out how you expected it to?" an airy, echoing voice spoke, as if surrounding him. Gandalf's eyes rose. It was Galadriel who graced his vision now, a happy change from all this stark sadness and death.
"I don't know what I was expecting. But it was not this." He lamented, walking up to her. "My lady… I thought you were resting." He said, with realization. "After all that transpired at Dol Guldor…"
"I had to come." She said, glancing up at Raven Hill's summit. Gandalf sighed, following her gaze.
"Thus ends the line of Durin, with the deaths of Thorin and his sister-sons." He said, with heaviness. "They have removed their bodies, but their blood still stains these stones." He sighed, looking back up at her "But…It is always a pleasure to see you, my Lady." He said.
"As it is for me, Mithrandir. But this time, it was not you I came to see." Galadriel said, quietly, her face set with seriousness. "I came to see someone…in great pain." She said. Galadriel looked towards the memorials.
"Great pain is felt by us all; with the fightingand deaths we have witnessed." He said, pursing his lips. She looked back at Gandalf.
"Not like this..." She said, softly, her ancient eyes searching the fields down the hill, to the tents where the where the bodies of the dwarves had been taken, a staging ground where they would be cleaned and dressed before their carriage into Erebor, and into the grand crypts of Erebor's royalty. Her eyes rested on a single small tent. "Over…there." she pointed. Gandalf looked to where the elegant finger indicated.
"That is the tent where the youngest dwarf, Kili was taken. The elf warrior, Tauriel, mourns by his side…" Gandalf said, his brows furrowing together. "It is the strangest thing…that such a close friendship developed between elf and dwarf, in so short a time." He explained. Galadriel looked towards the tent, a serene sadness on her face.
"It was more than that…" she said, starting to walk down the hill slowly, moving with the soundless elegance of an elf. Gandalf scratched his beard, confused, shaking his head. Gandalf donned his hat and hurried along behind her.
"I am afraid I do not follow you, My Lady." He started. "What do you mean?" Galadriel stopped and turned to him slowly.
"Their youth and willingness to see beyond their people's hate allowed something more to grow and bloom. Love. A very… special love." Galadriel said, as she looked back towards the tents. Gandalf blinked in disbelief.
"Love? Between a dwarf and an elf?" he stuttered, incredulous. "That is unheard of…"
"Yet quite possible." Galadriel said, continuing on her journey, slowly. Gandalf hurried along behind her.
"Well…I guess it could be so…but why did you have to come to her?" He inquired.
"An elf can wither away and die from a broken heart… Tauriel is young and may be unable to cope with this devastation." Galadriel confided. Gandalf's thick, bushy brows knit.
"How awful…I did not know it was even possible for that to…occur." Gandalf said, scratching his beard. She looked at Gandalf intently.
"I sensed her pain strong…from many miles away." She commented, a faraway look in her eye. "She has a gift she is not fully aware of as yet…a potent gift." Then she looked directly at him. Mithrandir…I must see her. She has the power of a mystic. Gandalf heard Galadriel say in his mind.
"Remarkable…" Gandalf said, the surprised look foreign on his usually all-knowing face. "This way." He motioned, rushing towards the tents. As they reached the small enclave of tents, a small figure came towards them.
Balin approached them looking exasperated, wringing his hands, looking sadly at the tent behind him. He held his hands up to stop them.
"We are ready to move with Thorin and Fili…We must take Kili soon." Balin said, with worry painted on his face. "There is much still left to do in the ceremony before the sun sets upon this day, and the sons of Durin must be commanded to their final resting place in Erebor." He said, shaking his head. "But…I haven't the heart to tear him away from her." Gandalf nodded and patted the distraught dwarf's shoulder.
"We will take care of it." He said, mouth pursed in sad acceptance.
Within the tent, the youngest Son of Durin was laid on a bolstered stretcher, in the center, raised just off the ground in respect. Every inch of him had been purified from the ork blood that had splattered and spilled. Kili had been tenderly cleaned, his wound wrapped and the royal vestments he would wear in his crypt placed on him, neatly, with exquisite care. His garments were rich blue and gold, the front neatly adorned with gilded metal, bright against his pale skin, yet the collar was unhooked at his neck, the vestment worn with little fussiness, much like Kili himself would have donned it. His hair was washed clean and dried, tossled loosely around his head, the dirt wiped from his cheeks. His eyes were closed, his handsome face set in a relaxed expression, lips closed. Next to him, where she had been since she had arisen, was Tauriel.
The Lady Galadriel walked silently behind Gandalf until their entry into the tent where Tauriel was holding vigil at Kili's side. Gandalf stopped short upon seeing her by the young dwarf. Galadriel walked slowly around Gandalf and gazed down at the fallen soldier as Gandalf glanced her way. Her head tilted in a curious manner and a look of subtle surprise fluttered over her beautiful features, before becoming pensive.
All is not as it seems, Mithrandir…I don't quite understand it… Her voice echoed in Gandalf's head. Gandalf's brow raised, and he wished to inquire further on what she meant, but he knew it was not the time…
Tauriel had not moved for hours. Others had come and gone into the little tent where she now was, but she barely saw them, remembering them as slow moving shadows that walked around, uttering sad words and condolences. She only vaguely remembered the image of King Thranduil walking through, but she remembered the heavy weight of his hand on her shoulder and his sigh as he passed her on his way out. It had been quiet for some time, so Tauriel was now sitting on bent legs, right alongside Kili, very close to her lover's body. Tauriel's heart ached with every breath as she looked over Kili, silent tears streaming steadily down her face, one hand wrapped tightly around his limp fingers. Her face was becoming as pale and as ashen as his with her grief. She heard the tent door pull aside. It was the wizard Gandalf approaching her…with…
"My Lady Galadriel…" Tauriel, said, shocked, leaning back on her haunches to rise, trying to maintain her composure. Galadriel put a delicate hand upon her shoulder.
"Tauriel of The Woodland realm." she said, in her breathy, ethereal tone. Tauriel sat back down and looked up at the beautiful Lady of Lorien. Galadriel looked at her intensely as she kneeled down before the saddened elf.
I know you can hear me, my child.
Galadriel said, but not with her voice. Tauriel blinked in surprise. The Lady of Lorien was speaking to her in her mind. Galadriel put her hand on Tauriel's head, her other hand resting on Kili's forehead gently. She closed her eyes and breathed. Then she opened them, and looked slowly between Kili and Tauriel.
You mourn a lost love.
Tauriel nodded, then struggled against tears, growing unable to hide it. Gandalf backed away slowly.
"How did…you know?" Tauriel said, in a small voice.
Your sorrow was easy to feel, my dear. Even across the miles to Lorien. Tauriel lowered her eyes to Kili again.
"They want to bury him now. But…how can they just imprison him in the dark?" Tauriel said, leaning over, shoulders hunching with pain. "He was…light and…life."
"It is their custom, as their spirits go in wait at the Halls of Madros. They do so for all their brave warriors." Galadriel remarked.
For those left behind, it will be difficult. Galadriel's voice echoed in Tauriel's head.
Tauriel looked over Kili, a sob escaping her as she pressed Kili's hand to her chest, her eyes wincing with anguish.
"It hurts. It hurts so much, even to breathe. I wish this pain would leave me…" she whispered through tears, rocking slowly. Galadriel tilted her head slightly.
"I can take it from you, child of the starlight." Galadriel said softly, stroking her hair, gazing upon her with gentle eyes. Tauriel looked up at her with surprise.
"You can?" Tauriel said, brows knitting, wiping her eyes. Galadriel took her hand and held it.
"Yes. But as the pain leaves, so will the memories." Galadriel said. Tauriel looked at Galadriel, wide eyed, and held her breath. "Every word, every touch, every moment you had together will cease to exist for you. And all the gifts he ever gave you…will vanish." Galadriel said, her eyes lowering. She pursed her lips. "Is that what you want?" Galatriel looked up to Tauriel's eyes sharply. Tauriel blinked her eyes, and shook her head slowly no, realization in her gaze. "Are your memories worth the pain you bear now?"
"Yes…yes…I…don't want to forget." Tauriel said, and then looked down at Kili, her eyes softening. "I don't want to forget anything…" She said, leaning over, stroking Kili's hair. "Not a single moment…" she whispered, a small smile forming on her saddened face.
Galadriel closed her eyes and breathed out as if relieved. Her eyes opened again, and a smile formed on her lips.
"Good. But now, my dear, you must say goodbye to him." Galadriel urged quietly, as she rose to standing. Tauriel looked up at her, swallowing hard.
"I don't know if I can …" Tauriel whispered, holding Kili's hand tighter.
His body you will leave here, yet he will always be with you, my dear. Every moment you had together was precious.
Galadriel's voice echoed in her mind, and then Tauriel sobbed suddenly, and nodded in agreement, her eyes closing as her head bowed.
"Yes…yes, they were." She said.
Tauriel looked down at Kili's perfectly peaceful expression, his high cheekbones, the sprigs of hair on his forehead, his long lashes, shadowed face, and his full lips as if to capture it forever in her gaze. Slowly, she bent over Kili and planted a soft, gentle, sweet kiss on his lips. At that moment, behind her closed lids, the visions of their time together flew quickly through her mind's eye, from the first gaze in Mirkwood to his last words on Raven Hill.
"Amralime…" Tauriel whispered "…le melin." She said, words of love in both their tongues, as she raised her lips from his.
Gandalf watched on, his heart aching, but his eyes caught a movement. He raised his gaze to look from whence it came. Galadriel's arms were above them, with her hands palm down, moving slowly in front of her, over the dwarf and elf. Gladriel's eyes were closed, her lips moving fast, as if uttering a silent incantation. A brightness, as if the sun was peeking above the horizon came from Kili and Tauriel. His brows knit. Galadriel's eyes and mouth opened slightly, as if surprised for a moment, but by the time Tauriel looked back up at her again, Galadriel's hands were clasped together before her, and a gentle, caring smile fell on her face.
"Love is the most powerful force in the world, child." Galadriel said, a bit breathless. "It can do the most amazing things…even heal broken hearts." Tauriel blinked a few times, and nodded.
"I hope so." Tauriel said, while giving Kili one last tender look and his hand one more squeeze. She placed his hand gently on his chest. He looked so peaceful at that moment that Tauriel had to remind herself that he was not just sleeping…
Galadriel looked at Gandalf with a cautioning, knowing expression. Tauriel rose slowly, leaving Kili alone, finally.
They all exited the tent, much to the relief of the dwarves waiting outside. The wizard, the elf queen and the warrior were guided by the dwarves to stand among a group of elves and Lakemen somberly in wait a short distance away. Balin motioned briefly to Tauriel, a subtle question on his face.
"Do you want to join us, in the procession into Erebor?" He asked, softly, just so she could hear. Tauriel gasped and shook her head slowly.
"No…I don't think I can…" She whispered back. It had taken every ounce of strength she had before to leave Kili. Balin pursed his lips and gave a respectful nod. He walked away, joining the procession.
Tauriel was greeted quietly by Legolas, who gave her a sad smile and stood beside her as they gazed on. A low dwarven drone, and funeral drums echoed off the rocks surrounding the plains before the Lonely mountain, marking the start of the funeral of the House of Durin.
The procession started underway, Dain leading from the front. The members of the company were among those who bore Thorin, Fili, and Kili from their tents, the parade with as much pageantry and honor as the Dwarven customs and this somber occasion allowed. King Thranduil and Bard followed immediately behind, in positions of honor as leaders in attendance. Thranduil held the sword Orchrist sheathed in gloved hands before him, a final token of honor to the deceased King Under the Mountain from the Elves. Bard gingerly and somberly carried the glowing heart of the mountain, the Arkenstone, to place in Thorin's grasp once his body was in its final resting place. They were followed by the remainder of Dain's battle tested force.
Legolas heard Tauriel gasp, and he placed a strong hand on her shoulder. Tauriel struggled to hold herself still and upright as she felt as if her very life would drain from her, as they carried Kili away. She held her breath the entire time the procession walked to Erebor, eventually releasing it when they disappeared into the dark halls.
Gandalf stood close behind Galadriel, looking on the somber scene with pursed lips, some distance away from Legolas and Tauriel. In his long existence, he had seen way too many of these such things, and it tired his soul to witness it yet again for these men he had grown to know and befriend. He just really wanted a good, long draught from his pipe. That would suit him just fine, he felt. Yet he could not help to wonder…
"So…what were you up to, back there, my lady?" He whispered, not too far from Galadriel's ear.
I did nothing; I was there as witness, just as you were…
"What of the light?" Gandalf asked.
Great forces are at work here that I do not understand; the very spirit of Middle Earth is unsettled, a tempest is brewing, and at the center, the darkness that has returned. The voices of the Valar are murmuring, but I cannot comprehend them. I don't know what this elf and the dwarf have to do with it, I only know that there is something afoot. Theirs was such a deep, powerful love such that even the gods took notice. We must have patience, my dear Mithrandir. Things will happen …only when and if they should. Galadriel's jeweled voice echoed in his head. Then and only then…will we understand.
Gandalf pursed his lips and grunted, disgruntled by this mystery.
Before leaving, Galadriel met briefly with Tauriel in private. Later that night, in the evening's shadows, they walked along one of the bridges leading from Dale.
"You have more strength in you than you realize, Tauriel." Galadriel said softly. Tauriel guffawed weakly and shook her head.
"You say that, yet I feel like I have no life left in me." Tauriel said slowly. "I barely feel as if I have the strength to breathe." She confessed, knitting her brows and looking towards Erebor. "It is as if I have been placed in that tomb myself; the day surrounds me, yet I cannot feel the sun. People speak, yet they sound distant, muffled. Even the very colors around are as if everything has faded." She gasped. "I cannot even fathom how to navigate the days before me."
"The wound is still fresh in your heart, my dear." Galadriel said. "Give it time." Tauriel crossed her arms and shook her head.
"But I am a warrior. Bitterness is some of what I do feel." She said darkly. "Those vile creatures have taken everything from me." She said, shaking her head. "First my parents, and now…" She closed her eyes. "Kili." She said, pursing her lips. "I worry it will consume me…"
Galadriel stopped and turned to face Tauriel. Tauriel turned slowly to face her. Her sad green eyes rose slowly to look at The Lady of Lorien.
You are a child of the light, my dear. And so you must remain. Love, in itself, is a priceless and pure gift, one that can never be taken from you. It will forever link you to him, in some way. Use the pleasant memories you have to soothe your wounded soul. And remember, you have made promises you must keep. Let that be the purpose that drives you to action, through these difficult times. Galadriel's voice echoed in Tauriel's mind. Tauriel wiped her eyes and clasped her hands.
"I will do as he bade me to…but, what then?" She asked. "I have so many questions, my lady, but I have not the wherewithal to ask them now - or listen to the answers."
"If I had the answers to give you, I would. But, my dear, in time, all your questions will be answered." Galadriel said. Tauriel put her hand to her head, and rubbed her forehead. She winced. Her head hurt. Everything hurt.
"When you are ready, after you are done fulfilling promises in Ered Luin, come visit me in Lorien, Tauriel. I will help you realize your potential." Tauriel nodded.
"I will." She said softly, as they resumed their slow walk, back to the city of Dale.
"And, there you will find a home, if you desire." Galadriel said to Tauriel. Tauriel managed a small smile and a nod.
"I thank you for all your kindnesses." Tauriel said. "And will seriously consider that request."
Sigrid walked around the encampment, hurriedly looking about. The tents were in various states of being broken down, the elves packing up with efficiency. She spied a tall blonde warrior, and looked on hopefully for a moment; he turned around. It was Legolas…
Sigrid approached him gingerly. He was talking to several other elves and pointing, obviously coordinating efforts. He noticed her and came towards her.
"Hello Sigrid." He said questioningly, as she looked around him, a little awkwardly. She knew that the prince knew her name in association with her father. A small smile played on his lips and he put his hands together before him. "Can I help you with something?"
"Hello, um, Prince Legolas," she started, fairly sure her cheeks were a bright pink hue at that time. She straightened up and sighed. It would do no good for her to act bashful now.
"Please, just Legolas…" he interrupted. She nodded. They had just been through so much during battle, there was no need for such formalities.
"I was just looking for Tauriel. Has she gone back to Mirkwood already?" She asked. Legolas' face became serious and sad. Sigrid became worried; did she do something wrong? She did see Tauriel after the battle, she knew she was alive…
"No, and she is not going back to Mirkwood anytime soon." He said, in a low voice. He turned towards a large outcropping in the middle of the field. "She wishes to go with the dwarves back to the Blue Mountains, to fulfill a promise, she says…" he said, wistfully.
"I just wanted to speak with her…" Sigrid said, pleading. Legolas looked back at Sigrid, a sad smile on his face.
"She is up on the top of those rocks. I am afraid she is not very talkative with me right now. You may have better luck." He said, flashing her a kind look and turning to rejoin the elves with their packing. Sigrid looked at Legolas as he walked away, feeling each step he took as if her heart had a string that was being pulled out…She could not lose any more friends.
"Legolas…" she said, feeling that she might as well speak her mind. He stopped and turned to face her. His light eyes and hair were lit up by the midday sun, his fine elven armor glistening…
"Yes?" he said, a small smile on his face when she did not speak for a few seconds…
"I…I was just wondering…if you will be coming back to Dale…sometime…soon…I mean, like in my lifetime." She stammered. He smirked. "You have friends here now." She said, clearly, insistently. Legolas walked back toward her slowly and stood close, before her.
"I know." He said. "I will be back to call on you and your family soon." he said, with a grin.
With that, Sigrid scrambled up the rocks, making sure to make enough noise so Tauriel would know she was approaching.
Tauriel was up on the highest ledge, her hair hanging loosely around her head, in her forest green captain's uniform. Tauriel turned to her, and Sigrid instantly felt badly. She was the image of mourning; her face stony and sad, her eyes hollowed. Her hands were in her lap; cradled within them was a small, oval stone.
"Hello, Tauriel. I hope I am not disturbing you." Sigrid said, gingerly. Tauriel acknowledged her with a glance and a small smile, and shook her head. Sigrid sat down in front and below her, and looked out on the white, snow covered plain before her. There was so much bloodshed there but a few days ago, yet the night snowfalls had covered it all, raining down like frozen tears from heaven, and with the bodies covered, the gentle hills were struggling to return to normalcy. Sigrid looked up at Tauriel.
"I am so sorry…about Kili…" she said, knowing full well why Tauriel was this way. Tauriel's sad eyes rose to hers. Tauriel looked over the plain to the ruins of the dwarf outpost where so many had died. She pointed vaguely in the direction of Raven Hill.
"He died over there…in my arms." Tauriel said, her voice thin and hollow and filled with such grief, it hurt Sigrid to hear it. "There was nothing I or anyone else could do." Sigrid slid closer.
"Did you tell him how you felt about him…before he…" Sigrid said, swallowing the words. Tauriel looked at her with surprise, as if to ask how she knew. "It was readily apparent to me how you felt about each other…" Sigrid revealed.
"Really?" Tauriel questioned. Sigrid nodded.
"Only because I was willing to see it." Sigrid said. Tauriel looked down, her thumb stroking the smooth stone in her palm.
"Well…yes. We did get to tell each other how we felt. And to say goodbye…" Tauriel said, softly. "At times, I feel I can still hear his voice, but is just a faint echo, one that I strain to hear." Tauriel sighed. Sigrid nodded and looked up at Raven Hill.
Sigrid could no longer hold herself together…all the sadness she had tucked away deep within her poured out and she began to sob uncontrollably. Tauriel looked over at the young woman, a bit surprised, but she approached her with a gentle touch on her shoulder.
"Sigrid?" Tauriel questioned…
"I am so sorry…I…didn't know…who else to turn to…who else…would understand…" Sigrid babbled before covering her eyes as a new wave of sadness made it difficult for her to breathe. Tauriel kneeled down and put her arms around her, and held the young woman, her eyes blinking, wondering.
"My dear…" Tauriel said, her brow knit. "Why do you weep so?" Sigrid eventually regained control, and sat back on her heels as Tauriel sat before her, waiting for her to speak. Sigrid wiped at her tears. She looked into Tauriel's eyes.
"I…I was there…at the bottom of the mountain when they brought him down…I…could not believe what they had done to him…oh, what they did to him…" Sigrid's voice strained and her face grimaced. Tauriel blinked, her brows kniting…"There were so many wounds…" Sigrid continued, struggling to speak. "He… he did not deserve it…he was kind…and brave…and so sweet…" she said, collapsing into Tauriel's arms with another bout of uncontrollable tears.
Tauriel held the sobbing young woman and searched her mind…her face bloomed with shock and understanding when she realized who she spoke of. It could not be Thorin…or Kili…their bodies had only one, fatal wound.
"Fili…" Tauriel gasped, as a sad, understanding expression wore onto her face. "You speak of Fili, don't you?" she asked, quietly. The head of the woman crying before her nodded against her shoulder. Tauriel gasped and held Sigrid tighter. Fili's body bore many, many wounds, as Tauriel recalled…she only hoped most of those were made after the kind, loyal brother ceased to breathe.
"Oh, my dear. Let your tears flow." Tauriel said, stroking her hair. As Sigrid cried, she spoke to her softly. "Where Fili is now, Sigrid, there is no more pain…no more darkness. Only light, and peace." She said. "And I am sure he knows you mourn for him. I know it." Tauriel whispered.
Tauriel held Sigrid close until she was able to pause a bit. Tauriel wiped at her tears and smoothed her hair, looking at her, in sad understanding. It felt good to be there for someone else in pain. Theirs was a sad sisterhood for the brothers who had fallen…
"I…could not talk to anyone…not Da, or Bain, or Tilda." Sigrid said. "I am so sorry to burden you…for you have your own loss…"
"Do not mention it further." Tauriel said, holding her hand.
Sigrid eventually told Tauriel everything. She told Tauriel about the a sweet warmth in her interactions with the golden haired young dwarf, ever since they met in Laketown, though she lamented that they were pitifully few, and she told her of that night when they kissed beneath the bridge. Sigrid recounted the shock she felt when finding out Fili was dead, and how she was devastated upon seeing him, torn and broken.
The two women sat as the breeze whistled about them, in silent understanding. As they sat together in communion, Sigrid thought how strange it was, that individuals from such different cultures, races, could care about each other when their peoples were on the verge of war. Only the most powerful things could bridge that divide. Being a young woman, Sigrid was prone to such fancy, but, she was also a realist, and fully aware of the trials and tribulations of life. Sigrid was fairly sure; however, for those two, the elf and the dwarf, that power was love.
Tauriel felt that the seeds of love had been planted in Sigrid, and was happy that she could be there for this young woman.
"What will you do now?" Sigrid asked, after a few quiet moments.
"I have a promise to keep; to return this to his mother, as he asked me to." She smiled sadly, as she held out the rune stone for Sigrid to see. "I think Kili just wanted me to meet her." She smirked, her fingers running over the stone, tenderly. Tauriel put the little stone away in a small, ornate satchel around her waist.
"Can…can I go with you?" Sigrid asked quickly. Tauriel looked back at her, a questioning gaze.
"You want to travel to a dwarf village, halfway across middle earth?" She asked, wondering.
"I… I just …I cannot stay here…" Sigrid said, shaking her head. "I am sorry, I should not have asked..." Sigrid said, quickly.
"No, please." Tauriel said, leaning closer. "Tell me why you want to go." She urged.
Sigrid looked up at her. She was still sorry for taking Tauriel away from her mourning, but then again, maybe that was a good thing…Sigrid took a deep breath.
"Ever since I first saw you, when you came to our house and slay the Orcs, and healed Kili, and escaped with him, I was absolutely in awe; the way you fought…it showed me how weak and vulnerable I was. How unprotected my family was." Sigrid sat up. "I never wanted to feel that scared, that weak again…but I don't know how to…be more like you…" she said softly. Tauriel sat up straight, her eyebrow lifting.
"So you want me to show you?"
"Yes!" Sigrid said, urgently.
"How to fight and use a bow?" She said, "Like an elf?" she continued.
"Yes!" She said hurriedly. "That is, if you wouldn't mind…or if you could…" she said. Tauriel looked at her thoughtfully. "I know I ask too much from you…and it is such a bad time…" Sigrid continued.
"I will think about it, Sigrid." Tauriel said, softly, nodding her head.
"That is all I ask…" Sigrid said, hugging her again, before descending the rock, leaving Tauriel alone again.
Tauriel looked over the grasslands, to the spires of Erebor, and the now open entrance. Then her eyes drifted up to Raven Hill where the dwarves fought and died, kinsman till the end. She missed Kili, but knew she had to find some way to continue on. It was his wish... She sighed, trying to fill the void wedged deep within her with something else other than the distinct, constant pain of loss. Tauriel pursed her lips.
To mentor a young woman may just be a good idea.
The days wore on and Dale and Erebor were well on their way towards normalcy. Dain was declared the new King Under the Mountain; as befitting a dwarf as any to take the reign from the house of Thrain and Thorin, a great leader in his own right now filling the seat of the King of Dwarves. He made quick work of cleaning and repairing the great city of Erebor, and repairing relations with the Elf King and the men of Dale, by doling out the gold, and the jewels requested as reparations to his new allies. The sickness of gold did not seem to be able to sink through Dain's thick hide.
But there were some dwarves not quite ready to be in Erebor without the leader of their company, his loss and the loss of his nephews leaving holes in their hearts. Their hearts only filled with sadness upon the thought of simply staying in the great mountain city. And, for others of the company, there were loved ones awaiting their return. And then there was the unenviable task of telling the last known survivor of the House of Durin, Dis, what had befallen her loved ones.
Dwalin, Balin, Bofur and Gloin all agreed to set out as soon as possible, back to Erid Luin, to inform Dis themselves of the devastating news before she caught word of it any other way. They would travel for some time with Gandalf and Bilbo. The hobbit was wallowing in homesickness with a heavy heart, yearning for Bag End fiercely now, his spirit tired and worn with all that had transpired. The loss of his friend, Thorin, had injured him deeply, but they did share a quiet moment of reconciliation before Thorin drew his last breath. It was Thorin's last request.
Reluctant at first, the dwarves finally agreed to have Tauriel and Sigrid join them. Tauriel confided in Dwalin, the most fervent against her, and told him of Kili's request and her promise to him. From that moment, the old warrior dwarf saw it as a matter of dwarrow pride and honor, to aid another in fulfilling the wishes of a fallen soldier, his beloved young kinsman. He became her most ardent supporter.
It took slightly more convincing and a world of promises and reassurances before Bard would agree to Sigrid going on her own personal quest away from home. He eventually agreed to her traveling only partway, to Rivendell, and from there, she promised she would return with a contingent of elves and supplies that Gandalf assured Bard that Lord Elrond would provide for her passage, with his intersession.
Thranduil and company planned on leaving Dale immediately, quietly, after the coronation of Dain, which was a muted affair, in light of the circumstances. Tauriel was staying with Bard and his family, and she only caught wind of it as she saw the elves marching away in the distance one morning. Tauriel gasped and ran up to the King's quarters in the shattered dome only to find it emptied. Tauriel gasped, her shoulders falling in disappointment. She so wanted to see them, the leaders of her people, her kin before she went on her own journey. She stared out over the quiet plain before Erebor with a new weight of disappointment adding to the sadness upon her. She walked away slowly, head held down.
"Tauriel." A stern, deep voice said, right behind her. She froze and turned around slowly. Her eyes rose to meet the grey gaze of the King of the Mirkwood, in all his glory before her. "I was looking for you." Tauriel sucked in a breath, struggling to hold herself together; but his eyes bore into her, but not with vengeance or anger. It was a look of understanding.
"My lord Thranduil." She said, breathlessly, a small smile on her face, with relief. They gazed at each other for a few moments. "I…thought you had already gone."
"Not before a word with you." He said. "I hear you will be traveling with some dwarves to the Blue Mountains…" Thranduil said, walking up to her slowy. Tauriel nodded urgently.
"Aye. That is true." She sighed.
"Why do you journey across Arda to a place you will not be welcome?" He asked, his voice low, his face set in wonder.
"I…have a promise to keep." She uttered quietly, her voice small and low.
Thranduil blinked and nodded. Again the quiet silence filled the air. Tauriel felt both comfort at being in her kings presence, and surprise at that he would actually stop and speak to an exile. He glanced at her and pursed his lips, walking to the edge of the stone balcony. Tauriel followed. She stared at her king as he looked up at the ruins of Raven Hill, a sad, forlorn look on his face. Tauriel sucked in a breath; she had never seen her king like this. He sighed and looked down, turning to her.
"Seeing you…with the dwarf, up there..." Thranduil said slowly, his voice filled with emotion, his brows furrowing as if in pain. "Reminded me…of terrible times … times I tried so hard to forget. Emotions…I thought were buried so deep as to never be resurrected." Tauriel gasped, holding back a sob, knees weak with disbelief at what she was hearing.
"I…I'm so sorry…" she started. Thranduil's grey eyes locked on to hers quickly.
"I want to thank you, Tauriel..." He said, cutting her off abruptly. Tauriel held her tongue. His face reverted to a peaceful expression. Tauriel could only nod, her voice failing her. "Just remember who you are…Tauriel of the Woodland Realm." Thranduil said. Tauriel blinked at him a few times as he gave the subtle, sweeping hand gesture that meant 'safe and sure travels.' Tauriel returned it with the gesture of acceptance and thanks. Thranduil waved back his vestments, walking past her on the way to the exit. Tauriel looked on as Thranduil strode away, her mouth dropping open in shock. But wait…
"My lord…" she said. Thranduil paused for a moment, at the top of the stairs, his head turned to her. "Please…tell Legolas…I said goodbye…" She continued.
"You may tell him yourself." He said, continuing on his way. Tauriel shook her head, wondering what he meant, and then she heard a few soft, distinctive steps. She steeled herself and turned around.
"Legolas…" she whispered. Legolas strolled over to her slowly, his eyes soft upon her, yet his face serious. Tauriel gasped, covering her mouth.
"You didn't think I would leave without saying goodbye, did you?" He said. Tauriel bit her lip, but she could not stop the tears from forming. She took in a deep, shaky breath.
"I…was hoping not…but…" she gasped, shaking her head. "I…I don't know if I can bear it…" He came up close to her and put his solid, heavy hand lightly on her shoulder.
"Bear what?" He asked, concern on his fair face.
"To lose you too…" She confessed. Legolas pulled her in and held her close, his arms surrounding her. Tauriel closed her eyes and held on to him tightly, letting her tears fall. She breathed him in; the scent of pine and earth and sun…
"You can never lose me, Tauriel." She heard him say. "I will be with you every time you climb the trees…" he added, with a slight laugh. Tauriel smiled, even through her tears. They separated, and she wiped them away.
"My spirit is so low, I fear I many never again enjoy the trees…" Tauriel lamented. Legolas looked at her with sadness in his eyes.
"You will, one day." He said, and then he looked down. "You know Kili would want you to." He added, a bit of hurt in his expression. Tauriel pursed her lips. Her chest hurt. She took hold of his hand and held it tightly.
"I will always remember everything you taught me." She said shakily, holding his hand. Legolas smiled and put his finger under her chin. She dared to look up, back into his sky blue eyes.
"Never forget…that I will always be your friend."
It was a cold, bright day when they set out on their trip to the Blue Mountains; four dwarves, an elf, a young woman, a hobbit, and a wizard; a tired and motley bunch. They rode in a long line, not too closely, the women alongside each other on horseback.
"So…what was it you saw in him?" Sigrid asked, turning to the quiet, red haired elf besides her. Tauriel smiled sadly, letting the slow cantor of the horse move her side to side a bit, as she thought further on the question.
"Oh…I don't know what it was exactly. But he caught my eye at first glance..." Tauriel said, images of Kili filling her head. "He seemed quite tall for a dwarf." Tauriel whispered softly, voice full of memory.
"Hmm. I have to agree with you on that…but was that all?" Sigrid asked.
"Well…he was also a bit reckless." Tauriel said, with a mild smirk.
"I thought it would be more than that…"Sigrid pursed her lips and rolled her eyes, in feigned disbelief. Tauriel smiled at the young woman's response. Tauriel turned around and gazed back at the stone spires of Dale, the square buttresses of Erebor, and finally upon the foggy, crumbling ruins of the fort at Raven Hill. She looked forward, the memories of their days together filling her mind.
"But, what I really love about Kili was…how he made me feel." Tauriel sighed. "Alive."