New chapter! YESSS! I don't have much to say except, please enjoy the chapter! ^_^
That small kiss on his temple, brief and simple as it was, was what got Severus through the next couple days of brewing the Wolfsbane Potion. There was something about it that just made it easier to fall asleep that night, and it had a lasting effect of keeping him calmer than he would have been without it. Vesperra should do that more often, he had thought. And he was sure she had intended for it to keep him calm as it did, which made it even better. Kisses did, after all, have healing powers. But was it the kiss itself or the intent behind it…?
As the second day of creating the Wolfsbane Potion was the most demanding, there was no time to speak to Vesperra, even though it was a Saturday. When he could spare a stray thought, he wondered how she was spending her time if she had an entire day of nothing to do but read. Of course, most of his days of staying at Hogwarts over the holidays while Lily visited her family as well as the time after her death until he met Vesperra had been that way, and her life had likely been the same before she started attending Hogwarts, but they had been spoiled with each other. It wouldn't be as easy to return to that life, even for a couple days. At least she would have plenty to do on Halloween….
But part of him, a very selfish part of him, wished that she could stay at Hogwarts with him rather than go to Hogsmeade, because he was plagued with particularly painful memories on Halloween. It was the anniversary of Lily's death, and he would never forget that. Lily was in Severus's thoughts everyday, whether he was consciously thinking of her or if she was roaming the back of his mind, as she did whenever he looked at Potter—especially at his eyes, that were the exact shape and color as hers… However, the thoughts brought him so much pain that he never purposely thought of her when he wasn't completely alone. When such thoughts were forced into his mind, he hid them. He didn't show feelings, and he didn't show his pain. That was what Occlumency was for.
When he was with Vesperra, though, Severus was almost always reminded of all the things that he loved about Lily. At those times, his mind was steered away from her death and he embraced the pain of remembering her, because he couldn't look past how much Vesperra was like her and at the same time so much like him. Vesperra always calmed him down and eased any pain, emotional or physical, just by being there. Her presence would have made most of it—the guilt, the pain, the horrible feeling of loss and emptiness—easier to deal with.
It was ironic that he had to spend the day marking the death of the woman he loved finishing a potion for a man that he hated. Wanting more than usual to redeem himself for Lily, he was feeling extra protective over Potter, but there was really nothing to do. The boy was alone inside the castle, and not out in Hogsmeade with the rest of the school, so he was in no danger. So Severus simply got on with the Wolfsbane Potion, mourning Lily all the while, though not very much more than he usually did. He almost never wallowed in sad memories—he endured them. He kept his true feelings bottled deep inside (though not as much when he was alone with Vesperra), and didn't let them affect his work.
However, he realized in the middle of the morning on Halloween that, by brewing the potion, he was making sure Lupin wouldn't attack anyone on the upcoming full moon, and therefore he was protecting Potter, in a way. That gave him more of a feeling of purpose, and he felt like he was slightly more worthy of Lily's forgiveness for indirectly killing her. It was still with a stiff composure and a stony expression, however, that he added the last touches to the Wolfsbane Potion, wishing as always that this day no longer existed, that it could simply be erased from the calendar so he would never have to experience it again.
But he was a grown man, and had aged far beyond his physical self, so he shouldn't dwell on such unrealistic thoughts. Those wishes were impossible, but he couldn't help but have them, nor could he help but wish, however selfish it was, that Vesperra was there with him. And yet, even that was a stupid thing to wish, because even if she had insisted on staying, he wouldn't have let her. He would have ignored his selfish desires and told her to go have fun in Hogsmeade. At least he knew she was relatively happy right now… That softened his mood a bit.
The morning had passed by neither slowly nor quickly as Severus added the very last of the ingredients to the Wolfsbane Potion and let it simmer at certain intervals, and he ended up finishing sooner than he expected. He didn't know whether he found that to be a good or a bad thing, because it meant both that it would be another month before he had to brew it again, and that there would be the entire rest of the day until after the feast that he had to spend without Vesperra and without a distraction from that fact.
Severus could have called Lupin through the Floo network and had him come get the potion himself, but he wanted to be as busy as possible to keep his mind off of other things. Actually walking to Lupin's office and back would kill a good fifteen minutes or so if he didn't walk so fast. And of course, he couldn't walk very fast with a goblet in his hands without fear of spilling it.
Ladling the proper dosage into a goblet, Severus promptly carried the faintly smoking potion out of the dungeons and to the second floor, seeing no one but a few of the Hogwarts ghosts (thankfully not Peeves, who didn't always listen to him despite the fact that he was a teacher) and hearing nothing but the chatter of the wall portraits on the way. The corridors were peacefully empty, which was one of the things he always liked about Hogsmeade weekends, except it had been several years since there was a Hogsmeade visit on Halloween. But it was hardly less enjoyable.
When Severus was merely feet away from the Defense Against the Dark Arts office door, he could hear muffled voices from inside, likely because his years of spying had made his ears well-trained to pick up on small noises. He didn't think much of it, though, since he automatically assumed Lupin would be speaking to another member of the staff, possibly through his fireplace, and the rest of the staff knew all about his disease. So he knocked.
"Come in," called Lupin's voice.
Severus opened the door at once, and walked in. Barely a second later, he saw who was sitting in the chair in front of Lupin's desk out of his peripheral vision, and it wasn't a teacher or any other member of the staff. It was Potter, looking as though he had expected Severus to be the person at the door as little as he had expected Potter to be the other person in the room. Behind his glasses, the boy's eyes were widened mildly in controlled fear, but Severus's confusion was too great to be satisfied that his presence had that effect. He had stopped in his tracks at the sight of the boy, his eyes narrowing as his penetrating gaze fixed on Potter.
"Ah, Severus," said Lupin. Severus looked back at him to see that the man was smiling, as he normally did. It annoyed him. "Thanks very much. Could you leave it here on the desk for me?"
Slowly, he stepped forward and set down the goblet of Wolfsbane Potion, even more annoyed that Lupin was acting as though nothing was out of the ordinary, and wanting to know why the hell Potter was in there. He wasn't going to ask that directly, but instead moved his eyes between the two of them, quickly gathering something he hated to think—that Potter and Lupin were friends. Surely the kid wasn't in here for any sort of lecture or punishment, which Severus knew because of the cup of tea in front of him. As good-natured as Lupin was, he wouldn't offer tea to someone he was punishing.
Apparently noticing Severus's confusion, Lupin said, "I was just showing Harry my grindylow." He pointed to the corner of the room, but Severus didn't care about the grindylow, and didn't even glance at it.
"Fascinating," he said with a bit of a sneer, looking directly at Lupin and no longer at Potter. "You should drink that directly, Lupin." It was at this that Severus became almost glad that Potter was in here, because the boy would see him giving Lupin his potion, and if he wasn't as much of an idiot generally as he was in Potions, he would understand that Lupin had a disease. Severus couldn't tell anyone directly, but he wasn't forbidden from encouraging any of the students to find out for themselves that Lupin was a werewolf….
"Yes, yes, I will," said Lupin.
"I made an entire cauldronful, if you need more," continued Severus, figuring that his wording should have made it obvious to Potter that this was some sort of medicine.
"I should probably take some again tomorrow. Thanks very much, Severus."
"Not at all," Severus said with forced politeness, mostly because Potter was in there. He wanted almost nothing less than for him to know anything of his past, which meant he couldn't have Potter wondering whether there was any personal, one-sided animosity between him and Lupin. There was still, however, a glint of loathing in his eyes for the both of them as he backed out of the room, stone-faced, until he closed the door and swept back down the corridors.
What made him angry in a way that no one else would understand was that Potter and Lupin had clearly taken a liking to each other. Severus still didn't trust the werewolf, and never would, but Potter apparently did. There were two feasible reasons as to why Lupin would like to be on friendly terms with Potter; either because Potter was the son of the man who was once friends with Lupin (especially with the fact that he looked almost exactly like his father), or because Lupin was still friends with Sirius Black, had somehow had a part in that murderer's escape, and wanted to get Potter to trust him so he could hand him over to Black when he had the chance. Severus found the second possibility much more likely.
And why Potter liked Lupin wasn't a difficult thing to guess—Potter responded to attention, and clearly Lupin had given him some. From what Vesperra had told him and what he had seen and heard around the castle, Severus knew that Lupin was now most of the students' favorite teacher. What reason could Lupin have given anyone but him and Vesperra not to trust him?
This was part of what made Severus both angry and worried—they all trusted Lupin. He couldn't have the majority of the students but Vesperra having no idea that Lupin had any traits or otherwise that would make him untrustworthy. Especially not Potter, who was in the most danger if Severus was correct in thinking that Lupin was not looking out for the boy's best interest. And he wasn't only angry about no one else distrusting the man, but also in the very fact that Potter trusted him. It made Severus's job even more difficult, and it was extremely frustrating that Potter always trusted the wrong people.
Despite all of this sudden anger and frustration, the fact that it was Lily's deathday was not driven from Severus's mind, and, if anything, it only strengthened his anger. He was protecting Potter for Lily and only for her, and on the anniversary of her death he comes across Potter in the office of a man he doesn't trust—a werewolf and the former (possibly still) friend of the murderer that had escaped Azkaban and wanted to kill him. How horribly convenient.
Every step Severus took away from that office felt like a hand clutching harder and harder on his heart, since he was leaving Potter alone with Lupin, but he knew he couldn't stay. But then, as he turned a corner, he heard the clicking of a door opening and closing echoing throughout the corridors, and knew it must have been Potter leaving. Figuring that Lupin wouldn't have dared harm the boy while he was nearby, Severus continued down to his dungeon office.
He immediately sat down on his couch, seething, and gripped the arm of the couch very hard, half-expecting a small hand to take his other hand, which lay to the left of him. Severus was now so used to that whenever he sat at this couch that he was nearly surprised when he didn't feel anything. His eyebrows knitting together and the lines of his face deepening, he glanced down at his empty hand, and then at the empty spot on the couch that Vesperra often inhabited. Now, more than ever, he wanted her to be sitting next to him. Even though he wouldn't have been able to tell her exactly why he was angry about Potter or about it being Lily's birthday, it would have at least been some comfort to have her there. Without Vesperra's hand to hold, he clutched at his couch cushion and scowled, starting to become irrationally angry at her for leaving.
No… No, that's selfish, I can't be angry at her—she had no idea that I'd end up needing her so badly… and neither did I. How could I be angry with her at all? I wouldn't—I couldn't—have even asked her to stay and not go to Hogsmeade, I wouldn't expect her to want to, just for me… Dammit, why am I so bloody selfish?
Severus couldn't push away the desire for Vesperra to have not gone to Hogsmeade, and he hated himself for it. But he needed something to calm him down, and in a way that only Vesperra could do. For the moment, he could take a Calming Draught, but Vesperra could do what a potion couldn't, and that was make him genuinely content, and not the sort of content feeling that came from a potion or spell affecting certain glands in his brain and his heart rate. Just like love potions—even Amortentia, the strongest of them, could not create genuine love. As happiness and calm were just as real as love, they followed similar principles.
Settling for the artificial source of calm (not that he had any choice), Severus took a Calming Draught and decided that, for Lily's sake, he'd patrol the corridors. Whether or not it had more than a sliver of a possibility of making a difference in Potter's safety, it just felt like the thing to do. Besides, it would keep him occupied, and he was far from being in the mood to read or brew potions, even in his somewhat calmer state.
I hope Vesperra's having a better time than I am, thought Severus as he swept out of his office and back out to the corridors.
Vesperra knew that her pocketful of Sickles and Knuts (and there might have been a couple Galleons left) must have been considerably lighter than the majority of the other students'. She could have easily depleted her only money even if she was only mild in spending, and that would have left her with nothing for the next Hogsmeade trips… but luckily, she wasn't at all used to buying things very often, so she knew it wouldn't be difficult to restrain herself.
However, she couldn't help but think of the future, when the money she had was gone…. There was no way to make it last from now until she left Hogwarts. Perhaps her mother would find a new job and wouldn't be reluctant to let Vesperra have some to spend on herself. Expecting her mum to be anything but cold to her after what Severus had done would be stupid, though, so she didn't get her hopes up. Well, there was always Severus, and he would indefinitely lend her money if she asked for it…. But she was not going to ask for it. Vesperra couldn't bring herself to ask for any sort of help even if she wanted it—she hadn't even gone to him when she was sick last year, so how could she go to him for something as simple as money?
Her mind returning to the present and deciding to cross that bridge when she came to it, Vesperra now only had to make the choice of where to visit first. Rather than going straight down High Street and visiting the shops in sequential order, she figured it would be best to visit the ones that were the least crowded first, and all the while making sure she was never in the same place as Malfoy. Vesperra didn't necessarily think he'd do anything worse than incessant taunts if he saw her again, but she'd rather avoid that altogether. She didn't his stupid, white-blonde, pointed face showing up and ruining her day even further.
It was difficult to be in an even somewhat bad mood, however, with the chilly wind wafting the various smells from the Hogsmeade shops and the surrounding scenery straight to Vesperra's nose, filling her up with a similar sensation to what the butterbeer did.
She walked past a few shops without bothering to even step inside them for a moment, which were mainly the smaller shops or the ones that only sold things that Vesperra knew she wouldn't even consider purchasing. There was Potage's Cauldron Shop, which she did slow down upon walking past to glance at what was beyond the display windows, but didn't stop completely, since it wasn't as if she would have any brewing to do outside Potions class. As long as she didn't pull some stupid mistake with horribly wrong measurements of ingredients like Longbottom often did, her school cauldron that she had bought in Diagon Alley when she was eleven wouldn't melt and be rendered useless. There was really no need for a larger, more durable cauldron, and especially not one that was solid gold, or one that was big enough for Severus to sit in.
The others that she had passed right by were even less of interest than the cauldron shop. Dogweed and Deathcap was a Herbology store, and many writhing, tentacle-like ferns were visible from outside the display window, as well as bulbous, brightly-colored flowers with poisonous-looking spikes around the petals that Vesperra had not yet seen in the Hogwarts greenhouses. But she hardly paid those any attention, because as well as she did in Herbology, that was simply out of her determination to make sure she did well in everything and not out of any particular fondness for the subject. She really only cared about the properties of certain herbs and plants, as many of them were used in potions, rather than tending to them herself while they were alive.
And Sprintwitches, of course, didn't catch Vesperra's fancy, however much attention it drew with the bright colors of the shop. It was a sporting goods store, mainly focusing on Quidditch, and she hardly cared about Quidditch at all. The most she would do was sit through a game of it, and only if it involved the possibility of Slytherin winning or Gryffindor losing—but she would never play it. Even if she did have any skill, she wouldn't subject herself to possible humiliation. It had been forever since Slytherin even had a girl on their Quidditch team.
The Magic Neep seemed to be mainly for the locals, as it was a greengrocer's, so it was pretty much useless to even glance in its direction. Vesperra wouldn't be getting any food while in Hogsmeade, not while Hogwarts House Elves provided more food than she could ask for, and probably some of the best in the world… well, except sweets. But Honeydukes was definitely the last to visit on her list, as it was indefinitely the most crowded, even more so than the Three Broomsticks.
But the first place she entered was the Hogsmeade Post Office, a tall building with mullioned windows that resembled the Hogwarts Owlery, but it was much, much larger, and definitely more organized. Inside, the floors were clean for the most part, not littered with the skeletons of dead mice and voles or owl droppings or straw. From a table jutting out of the wall all around to ceiling on the entire wall except for the two doors were lined with nesting hole-like boxes with owls either sleeping or staring at the customers with large, round eyes.
There wasn't anyone Vesperra had that she could write to even if she wanted to, but it was interesting to have a look around nevertheless. As she paced slowly around the Post Office, craning her neck to look up at the owls on the walls, she unconsciously let her previously hardened face grow soft with mild interest so that she wouldn't have appeared to be an unpleasant person at all if it weren't for her naturally off-putting nose and greasy hair.
What was particularly interesting to her was the way the post owls were set—from left to right, they ranged in size, gradually going from tiny pygmies to great horned owls, and each were color-coded depending on how far and how fast they could travel. The largest and most expensive of them were guaranteed to take no longer than a weeklong trip to Spain and back, and the smallest, which were like fluffy little tennis balls, twittering madly and bouncing off the edges of their cages, were only for local deliveries.
Even if Vesperra couldn't actually use any of these herself, she appreciated the preciseness of the Post Office and the fact that every detail was accounted for. And there were plenty of school owls she could use if the need ever arose, but it was simply the stark beauty of Hogsmeade so exemplified in here that she liked so much—it was an entirely magical village, where there were witches and wizards that sent their letters by the use of birds whose intelligence was only shown when they were in contact with magical people, rather than a slit in a metal box outside or a slit in the doorway like Muggles did. Just having an owl of her own would make her feel so much more connected with the Wizarding world aside from Severus during the summer….
But there really was no reason for her to have one, and her father would throw a fit. Vesperra wouldn't have to go back home for nearly another year, anyway, so she shouldn't have even been thinking of that.
"Having trouble figuring out which owl would get the distance you need?"
Her idle thoughts were interrupted by a kindly voice behind her; Vesperra spun around on her heel, which was satisfyingly easy on the smooth floors, and she came face to face with one of the Post Office wizards, who wore collared robes and a roguish smile that reminded her too much of Gilderoy Lockhart. He must have noticed her walking around particularly slowly….
She couldn't stop the cold side of her (which was a rather big side) from sneering almost automatically at the man's Lockhart-isms and saying before he could continue, "No, I won't be sending any letters. I'm just looking around." That had come out a bit more snappishly than she intended, and the wizard's smile became one of only strained politeness as he walked away.
At that, Vesperra decided that she'd gotten a good look at pretty much all of the owls and resigned to the fact that she'll have moved out (and possibly in with Severus?) before she got her own owl. Sweeping her gaze once more over the hooting lot of them, she returned to the cold, outside streets. She hadn't realized it while browsing in the Post Office, but now she smelled quite a bit like owl treats. Perhaps she had spent too much time in there.
Hoping to God that neither Malfoy nor Pansy or any of the other Slytherin girls happened upon her and commented on how she now smelled (it wouldn't be unlikely with her luck), she set back out, roaming High Street and the side streets and checking behind her every minute or so.
Vesperra passed Dominic Maestro's, the Hogsmeade music shop, without a second thought, as she had never found much interest in music, partially owing to the fact that she was never introduced to it. If her mother had ever owned a Wizarding Wireless radio, she had never brought it out, or at least never in front of Vesperra. And her father didn't often listen to even Muggle music, so the only thing that she had ever listened to was the occasional commercial jingle from her father's television—and, of course, the school song that Dumbledore had had everyone sing just before bed at the end of her first start-of-term feast at Hogwarts. But she obviously hadn't joined in, and she could hardly consider that music—with everyone singing at a different tune, and the majority of them being unable to sing without risking causing others' eardrums to bleed…
The shop right across the street from Maestro's was Tomes and Scrolls, which, Vesperra was pleased to see, was relatively empty. It was unsurprising in almost a bad way, as it was a bookshop and the fact that less people enjoyed reading (or even knew how to read, if you were referring to people like Crabbe and Goyle) had her disappointed and annoyed with society in general. Then again, it put her at the top of the levels of intelligence, so she couldn't really mind.
When she stepped inside, she did recognize some other Hogwarts students perusing the shelves; most of them were Ravenclaws, except for two near the corner, who were standing with their backs to her and were whispering harshly among themselves. Though she had come in here specifically for the quiet, Vesperra was suddenly wishing they'd speak louder so she could hear what they were saying. Quickly, she made as casual a beeline as possible towards the stretch of shelf-lined wall that was to the left of them, and pretended to be checking the titles on the bindings while she mentally stretched her ears to the spot next to her.
"—we even have to be in here, Hermione? When are you going to realize that you're probably the only person in Hogwarts that reads for fun?" Ron Weasley was saying, who Vesperra had easily recognized by the back of his head, which was covered in vibrantly red hair. It was more easily recognizable, however, because of the head of bushy brown hair right next to him.
"I am not the only one, Ron," whispered Granger without looking at him. "There's plenty of other people in here—"
"Yeah, well, that's because they're nutters, all right? Harry's not going to want a book—I say we leave and head straight to Zonko's—"
"Why waste money junk from Zonko's?" Granger pulled out a few books and flipped through the pages, apparently comparing them. "You know, I think Harry'd like one of these books on Astronomy—you could, too, and that way, even when you're both too lazy to go to the library, you won't need me to write your essays for Professor Sinistra for you." She closed the book as-a-matter-of-factly with a cock of her head. Vesperra couldn't see her face, but she was sure the girl was raising her eyebrows at her ginger friend.
Weasley gave an exasperated sigh, as though this sort of thing happened often. "Hermione, those books are too advanced, only you could ever understand them…. And who said we were lazy?" There was a pause in which Vesperra figured Granger must have arched an eyebrow and frowned. "Alright, I'm a bit lazy, but you know I haven't got that much money, so I'm not going to spend half of what's left on that—"
"Well, maybe if you hadn't bought extra rounds of butterbeer just so you could spend more time at the Three Broomsticks mentally undressing Madam Rosmerta, Ron…" said Granger, the jealousy obvious in her voice. The back of Weasley's neck and his ears turned the same color as his hair.
"Whatever," said Weasley. "But if you're going to get him a book at all, why don't you at least get him a Quidditch book or something that he'd actually like? Actually—no, I forgot, I already did that last Christmas…."
"You don't know he wouldn't like it," snapped Granger. "I think he'd be glad if I made it easier for him to do his homework—and you don't have to buy anything, Ron, you can just share with him—"
"Hermione, you may be smart when it comes to books, but you've got a lot else to learn… like how not everyone cares as much about homework as you do! Harry and I are perfectly fine just letting you look over our essays and correcting them!"
At this point Vesperra stopped listening, deciding that it could only go downhill from here and that nothing in the rest of Granger and Weasley's conversation would hint to her why the missing person to their usual trio—Potter—couldn't go to Hogsmeade. Merlin, they bicker like a married couple… thought Vesperra, annoyed, as she closed the book she had taken to pretending to read to hide that she'd been eavesdropping. To get away from the ginger and the know-it-all, she stepped away and started running her fingers along the spines of other books.
Tomes and Scrolls was somewhat unlike the Hogwarts library, mostly in that it wasn't anywhere near as high-ceilinged, and there was no vulture-like woman prowling the aisles of shelves and breathing down the necks of anyone who dared touch the books. It was also different in that the majority of the books were relatively new, rather than hundreds of years old with faded binding like half the books in Hogwarts. Not much in there was quite as new as the books in Flourish and Blotts, nor were the covers as brightly colored, but the older books at least looked refurbished and restored.
However, the books were mainly history and spellbooks, as Vesperra didn't see many novels. That didn't make them any less desirable, though (at least not to her). She was glued to an old Potions tome for several minutes before being distracted by the loud whisper of "Fine, then, I won't get it, and we can go get some pranks from Zonko's that are less fun than they're worth!" and Granger marching purposely out of the shop, followed by a disgruntled Ron Weasley that looked desperate to apologize for whatever he had said.
After the shop door swung a few times back and forth on its arc and finally closed with a loud click, Vesperra sighed and shut the book she was holding, knowing that she was likely as financially impaired as Weasley if not worse, and that she wasn't going to buy anything as much as she'd like to. But then, she wondered why she had even come in here, because any sort of books she wanted could easily be accessed through the Room of Requirement; and once again, it was the same general reason as it was for the Post Office—the stark beauty of Hogsmeade. The Room of Requirement was extremely useful, but it could be visited everyday opposed to about three times a year.
Judging by the light outside, the sun had already begun descending from its high peak, which meant that Vesperra's time to go everywhere in Hogsmeade that she wanted to was half up, and there were still plenty of places to go. So she slid the tome back onto its wooden shelf, followed in the distant wake of Weasley and Granger towards the door, and pushed it open without stopping.
As soon as she stepped outside, she stopped, for she saw Malfoy's profile across the street, walking with Pansy Parkinson clinging onto the elbow that wasn't bandaged. Rather than immediately ducking down, as she'd have liked to despite how stupid of an idea that was, she simply turned away from them and walked slowly in the opposite direction so they wouldn't be likely to notice her. When she turned back around twenty seconds later, Pansy was pointing to the window display in Gladrags, which featured a set of bright pink, excessively layered and frilly robes and laughing so hard that she was shaking. Malfoy gave her sort of an annoyed smile and pulled her into Zonko's. Merlin, that couldn't be good…
But wait, Vesperra thought, Malfoy's sense of humor must be far sicker than the harmless pranks in Zonko's…. If he wanted to use anything on me, it wouldn't be anything he got in there. That wasn't necessarily a comforting thought, but at least they were inside the other shop and no longer had a chance of seeing her. Even if they did, they weren't going to run straight out of Zonko's and start tailing her; clearly, they were on some sort of date. Or rather, Pansy had probably found him and decided that they should spend the rest of the visit together and Malfoy obliged to any sort of attention, from a girl or otherwise.
Vesperra walked back again past the Post Office, mostly convinced that she was safe for the moment, and decided to check out some of the other side streets, whose shops weren't likely to be as crowded. She passed Zonko's with slight trepidation, since Malfoy was in there, and rounded the corner to the left of Gladrags, which she was definitely not entering anytime soon. It was a shop entirely of clothes, and most prominently very eccentric ones. As Vesperra wasn't one to care about her own appearance or what she was wearing as long as she wasn't walking around starkers, she had no use for anything in there. Her school robes and few sets of shirts were enough.
Jutting out on the corner where High Street and Elm Road met was Scrivenshaft's, a small, time-worn shop that apparently sold all sorts of quills. Interested and glad to see that this shop was mostly empty, Vesperra stepped inside. Weasley and Granger weren't here this time, so there wasn't any hissing or whispering to punctuate the silence, but instead the occasional scratching of quills on parchment to test them out, a sound that Vesperra liked.
This was another one of those places where she knew she wasn't going to buy anything, since she already had quills and none of them had broken and she didn't want to waste money, and because she didn't think she'd have any use for the ones with special properties, but she simply wanted to have a look around at them.
There were quills of all sizes and all different types of feathers—Raven, Eagle, Emu, several tropical birds… even Peacock, and those were among the most expensive. Some had differently styled tips that were better suited to different types of writing, and some were different sizes depending on the size of the person using them. It was definitely a much wider selection than Scribbulus's, the stationary shop in Diagon Alley.
Almost disappointed that there hadn't been anything in particular that she'd have liked to buy there, she set off for the rest of the small side street to see what there was. Unfortunately, the only other two shops on that street were a hairdressing salon (Vesperra was sure Pansy would have shouted across the street that she ought to go in there if the girl had had the chance) and, next to that, possibly the worst place in Hogsmeade.
Vesperra stopped, aghast at the small tea shop called Madam Puddifoot's. It was a tackily decorated place with lace-like edges on the outside signs… and pink. So much pink. The windows were steamed up, but at a relatively close distance, she had a mercilessly clear view of the obviously happy couples sitting inside, either smiling like idiots at each other or snogging. Have some bloody decency, dammit, she thought disgustedly, turning away from the radiating happiness and love of Madam Puddifoot's. And don't snog in public.
Part of her simply wanted to get away from the awful sight, and the other part was looking out for her well-being, and wanted to get as far away from that place as possible before Malfoy and Pansy found her near it. And there was also the fact that the shadows of the buildings and street signs were dipping further and further to the right, meaning that she'd do best to hurry up and visit the main spots of interest before the majority of her fellow students started heading back to Hogwarts, and save the few smaller ones she hadn't yet been to for the next trip.
Walking more quickly than she had been, Vesperra passed the intersection to the side street that held the Hog's Head and went directly to the end of High Street, where Dervish and Banges, one of the largest shops, resided. Inside were a multitude of magical instruments, many of them metal, and either buzzing, flying in circles by themselves, or puffing up smoke. It reminded her somewhat of Dumbledore's office.
It was difficult not to stay too long and examine everything in there, and she might have bought a Sneakoscope if they all hadn't started spinning when she walked near the display table. The shop owner assured her that they weren't defective, and that it must have been that she had done something untrustworthy very recently, but she knew that if she owned one, it would be spinning all the time, for she was a generally secretive and untrustworthy person. Ironically, the only person that mattered to her was the only person that could trust her, and otherwise, no one would even think about trusting her with a secret—not for fear that she would tell it, but that she would use it against them. Then again, Theodore Nott had trusted her with not telling anyone about the things he supposedly saw pulling the carriages…. But that was one thing. That didn't really matter.
When Vesperra had moved away from the Sneakoscopes and the blasted things stopped spinning, she only took a minute to look at a set of complicated watches with many sets of hands and layers of moons that were very similar to the one she noticed Dumbledore wore before heading out again, now even more anxious to spend her dwindling time wisely.
Luckily, she realized, out of the high points of High Street there were only two shops left, and one of them she could completely ignore; as popular as Zonko's was, it wasn't her kind of place. Stupid pranks weren't amusing to her, nor were any of the other things like fireworks (she still remembered the one that Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan had used to destroy her book in her first year, and the one that Potter had presumably used to disrupt Potions class and splash Swelling Solution everywhere in her second).
No, her sense of humor was one that most people would call rather sick, and if she wished ill upon anyone, she knew much more effective ways to hurt them than with pranks. None of the childish toys that she knew were in Zonko's (only from once glancing at the extensive list of banned products tacked onto Filch's office door) would be of any use to her, and so she went straight to Honeydukes, feeling that she had successfully implemented the famous quote and saved the best for last. Well, the best in most students' opinions, at least.
Waiting until now to go inside Honeydukes hadn't made much of a difference as to how packed with children and adults alike it was, but Vesperra was sure there were slightly less people than before. Purposely looking around at the walls and aisles of candy, she avoided looking at any of the people in case anyone that knew her was in here, since 'knowing' her was almost always interchangeable with 'hating' her. Although, most people wouldn't have many dark things on their minds while in a place like this, not even Malfoy.
With each of the walls surrounding her having candies hanging all over them, many of which were brightly colored, Vesperra felt out of place. The atmosphere in there was so cheerful, so unlike her, and yet she didn't even think of stepping out…. And the reason for that was simple—what child didn't enjoy sweets? Especially her, who had grown up deprived of the magical world despite having a pureblood mother, and hardly ever getting any sweets, Muggle or otherwise…. Meals at Hogwarts, where the golden platters kept refilling with food until they were full, and Chocolate Frogs from the Hogwarts Express were all she had ever had as far as magical food went.
So she walked along the aisles, looking a great deal less enthusiastic than most of the other students in here, who were gamboling about and pressing their faces to the enormous glass jars of Exploding bonbons, smiling widely as they gathered all the sweets they could carry without a second thought as to how much it would cost them—Vesperra was, admittedly, a bit more eager than she let on. She was definitely not smiling, but she wasn't quite scowling, either, and her lips even twitched into a near smirk at some of the things she came across.
Along one wall were shelves upon shelves of nougat and toffees and large, pink squares of coconut ice that looked rather like granite, and at first Vesperra was tempted to buy one of everything without even having properly looked at everything else (except the coconut, she hated coconut), but then she moved her gaze to just below eye level, and saw that the three lowest shelves were stacked with hundreds of different kinds of chocolate. If it weren't for the first year that had bumped into her just then, she might have forgotten that she was surrounded by people.
Vesperra had so far kept herself from spending any money besides the two Sickles on that butterbeer, and she felt that she deserved to spend a little more money on herself. A manic gleam appeared in her eye as she grabbed a Honeydukes bag from where they were hanging so harshly that she nearly ripped it, and made the difficult decision of which of the hundreds of types of chocolate to buy. Firstly, she narrowed it down to anything that didn't have nuts, peanut butter, coconut, or a fruity flavor, then indulged on most of the free samples, and then tried to choose from there.
Several stacked boxes near the left edge of the rows caught her attention, which were pinstriped with green and brown, and the shiny gold lettering gleamed as much as the manic glint she had: Chocolate Cauldrons—and under that, with mild dosage of Firewhiskey. The golden letters didn't have to gleam at her twice—she grabbed a box and stuffed it into her bag, and continued looking.
With difficulty, she detached herself from the chocolate after having also chosen a block of treacle fudge, and moved along. Vesperra had apparently been so immersed in the chocolate that she was almost surprised to see once again that there was more to the shop.
An entire wall was devoted to "Special Effects" sweets, which Vesperra was more interested in just knowing what they did than actually buying or eating them. Some of them, actually, seemed rather stupid to her…. Droobles Best Blowing Gum, according to the jar that held it, could create several blue, large, thick bubbles, that wouldn't pop for days, even with the administering of sharp objects. The only benefit Vesperra could see in that was blowing some near Pansy Parkinson and watching the girl's reaction as it got stuck in her hair.
Peppermint toads didn't seem so bad until she realized that they were not essentially the same thing as Chocolate Frogs as she thought they might have been, and that they would actually feel as though they would hop around in your stomach. The thought of it made Vesperra feel slightly sick, and she could only imagine how unpleasant that would feel.
There were Ice Mice, which would cause your teeth to chatter and squeak, and Vesperra left those alone for the reason they were merely ice-flavored, and also that she always hated it when it was so cold that her teeth chattered. Once again, she wondered why anyone would buy a candy that had such an unpleasant feeling. Pepper Imps, the polar opposite of those, didn't seem too bad, though…. They'd be terribly spicy, but being able to breathe fire for a limited amount of time sounded cool when she thought about it. However, Vesperra didn't end up buying any of those or any of the other "Special Effects" sweets, finding that they crossed the line of childishness and that it would be extremely odd for anyone to see her eating something like that, anyway.
Her eyes flashed maliciously at a jar of Acid Pops as she continued to walk around, wondering if she could manage to give one of those to Malfoy without him realizing what it was. But he'd have likely already been in here, so he would have already seen them…. How could anyone possibly eat one of those voluntarily, though, when it would probably burn a hole right through your tongue?
Many jars and shelves later, in which she had chosen a few harmless sweets from, she came to the farthest corner in the shop, where a sign hung from the ceiling: Unusual Tastes. It was more than likely the emptiest part of the shop, and Vesperra could see why; There weren't many shelves, but instead a table smaller than all the others in Honeydukes, which had trays and jars of things like Cockroach Clusters, some candy bars that seemed to be fish-flavored, and Blood-flavored lollipops. She vaguely wondered why the barrel of Every Flavor Beans wasn't over here, and picked up the tray of the dark red Blood Pops.
None of the other unusual sweets were at all desirable, but she found herself strangely interested in those. During her childhood of often getting cut and developing a habit of licking it rather than doing anything else to stop the blood flow or make it stop hurting, she had learned that blood really didn't taste that bad.
So, knowing full well that if she was seen buying any of these (especially by Thomas or Finnigan) it would only encourage and worsen the jokes about her being a vampire, she grabbed five and dropped them into her bag, which was considerably less full than most of the others' in there, even though they weren't even done filling up their bags yet. Vesperra ignored the sudden, tiny wish that she wasn't so poor, and made to purchase her sweets.
After giving the middle-aged Mrs. Flume five Sickles and one Knut, she reluctantly left Honeydukes and started back down High Street, following in the wake of many other students who all looked as though they had the time of their lives but were dispirited for the moment at having to leave. From shops all around, students were coming out, some alone, some linking arms with a couple of friends, and some holding hands with their boyfriends or girlfriends the same way Vesperra always held Severus's hand, and either frowning down at their watch or looking up at the sliver of gold between the clouds in the sky. There was a general air—and she was sure everyone else could feel it too—of the day being over and the fun ending.
The fun hadn't necessarily ended, though, because, along High Street, Vesperra could see and hear other students catching up with their friends, laden with bulging Honeydukes and Zonko's bags or else carrying their half-drunk bottles of butterbeer from the Three Broomsticks (she highly doubted anyone else would have gone to the Hog's Head), and laughing. Amongst the enthusiastic, and yet worn-out chatter of those that had left the stone streets and were now strolling once again on the trail back to Hogwarts were a few clear sentences that Vesperra could pick out:
"Did you see Salma Fawcett running out from Madam Puddifoot's today? I think Roger Davies broke up with her—Wait a second, that means he's free…"
"Damn, I spent too much time in the Three Broomsticks… I didn't even get to visit the Shrieking Shack!"
"Hey—check out what I got from Zonko's—reckon I'll be able to set off some dungbombs in Filch's office and blame it on Peeves?"
Apparently, Vesperra hadn't been the only one of the crowd that had heard that person, because nearby a voice that sounded like one of the Weasley twin's said, "Amateur…"
As the whole of Hogwarts meandered down the trail (assuming no one had been left behind), Vesperra felt strangely lighthearted. It wasn't that she was unfamiliar with the sense of having fun—she had been introduced to that when she first started actually spending time with Severus… but it felt strange to think that it was possible for her to have fun without Severus—and not sardonic fun, either. Vesperra almost felt as though she was betraying him in a way, like she wasn't supposed to be genuinely happy unless it was because of him. And something—she didn't know what, but something in her made her not want to have fun that wasn't because of Severus.
Was it that she was just too used to being generally annoyed and angry anytime she wasn't with him, and didn't like the sudden change? Or was it because part of her twisted idea of love, which she'd only recently realized she felt towards him, included the fact that you weren't allowed to enjoy anything but the person you loved? Or, possibly… could it have been because one of the things she loved about Severus was that he was the only thing that could make her smile, calm her down after she'd been angry all day, or cause warmth to blossom in her chest and make her feel as happy as all the normal people were, and she thought that, if anything else could ease her usually permanent scowl, she didn't love him enough?
No—of course I love him enough, Vesperra reasoned with herself, only vaguely paying attention to where she was walking. I love him more than enough…. And—and this can't be genuine happiness—it's not the way Severus makes me feel at all… No, it's just a bit of fun, wasn't it? I don't think I even smiled the whole time… besides, I enjoyed myself in Knockturn Alley too, and Severus couldn't have come here, anyway…. And it's not like a person made me happy, it was just Hogsmeade… just shops…
Figuring that she had merely had an irrational thought that didn't deserve to be dealt with anymore, Vesperra stopped thinking about that and sighed inwardly. The sun seemed to be sinking beyond the mountains at the same rate she was walking, so it would make perfect timing and leave the grounds dark just as the last of the students made it back through the oak doors. It was actually quite nice, walking down the wide dirt trail in the late afternoon, the sun not necessarily shining, but sending a misty look out over the distant grounds so that it seemed calmer than ever. If there was a possibility that they could be alone and unspotted, she'd have liked to walk with Severus out her at this time. But the Hogwarts gates were in the distance, and Vesperra could see two dark figures hovering above it….
During the time before she'd have to pass the dementors again, she rummaged in her bag of sweets so she could eat and have that to keep her mind off of them. She was compelled to try a Blood Pop first, since it was the only thing in there that she wasn't yet sure she'd like. Fishing one out while holding the bag in one hand, Vesperra ripped off the clear wrapping around the edible part with her teeth and, once she had the bag lifted up to be held momentarily in between her upper arm and chest, she pulled it out of her teeth and tossed it back in the bag, not wanting to leave rubbish on the trail.
Haphazardly, she shoved the whole thing into her mouth rather than taking a tentative lick first, and it was a few seconds before she had tasted it properly and decided that she liked it. It was accurate in its taste, having the metallic, salty taste that blood had…. In a large quantity, which was mostly unlike licking a small cut, it had the same tingle when it was on your tongue and either felt thickly unpleasant or unconventionally satisfying going down your throat over and over again, depending on who you were. It was also quite different in that it was more or less blood in the form of a lollipop, rather than a straight liquid…. Although, she wasn't sure whether it was actual blood, or of whether or not it would congeal if left out for a while….
That lasted her some ways past the Dementors (at which she had done the same thing as before), and by the time it was simply a white stick with a bit of red left on it, she was sure that the entire inside of her mouth was dark red, and it would have looked to anyone as though she really was a vampire and had just had a nice feast. She wiped her mouth on the sleeve of her robes in case there was any blood (or whatever it was) dripping down, and didn't eat any of the rest of her candy, since there would be the Halloween feast later and it would have plenty of puddings at the end.
Malfoy, luckily, didn't bother her on the way back (nor did anyone else), and it wasn't until after Vesperra had gone down to her dorm to drop off her bag of sweets and returned to the Great Hall for the feast that the taunting she was used to resumed—and even then, it wasn't as horrible as usual. Comments about her were made in between mouthfuls of food and the talk of everyone else's time in Hogsmeade, and they were all things like, "Disappointed you couldn't find a good present for Snape, Grease-perra?" and "I expect your mood killed most of the flowers on the sidewalk…" and the indirect mutterings of "Is it me, or is her mouth really red?"
The decorations were as usual, with the hundreds of live bats swooping sometimes very low over the House tables and the candle-filled pumpkins emitting an orange glow as they hovered in the Great Hall, and there were also many flaming orange streamers, which were swimming lazily through the air, almost slithering…. There was the general air of eeriness mingled with cheerfulness in the way that it was supposed to be on Halloween, and Vesperra found herself less annoyed at that than usual.
The food was too delicious to eat less than at least two helpings of, and a lot of the insults and taunts from Malfoy and the others came across thickly due to their mouths still being full of food. Once or twice Vesperra chanced a glance up at the Staff Table, where Severus was eating without looking up, his face looking quite distant except for when his eyes seemed to flicker down the table towards Lupin. She wondered what he had done while she was in Hogsmeade, and whether or not he was angry about something. If he was, it was likely because of Lupin or Potter, she figured…. Well, she supposed she'd find out after the feast. But she couldn't help but continue to feel bad that he couldn't have had near as good a time as her.
Before the feast ended, most of the Hogwarts ghosts participated in some formation gliding through the walls and floors for an entertainment. Vesperra wasn't very entertained, however, mostly because the Bloody Baron flew directly through her from the floor up, and having a ghost fly through you is never a good sensation. Especially not when it's prolonged.
Nevertheless, when Vesperra left the Great Hall with the rest of the Slytherins in the direction of the dungeons after the feast, while Malfoy yelled "The dementors send their love, Potter!" towards the Gryffindor table, she felt that this had been by far the best Halloween she'd had yet.
Potter was still alive when the feast began, but Severus wasn't any less suspicious of Lupin. Perhaps he was merely in a sulky and distrustful mood from not having seen Vesperra since breakfast, but he enjoyed the feast even less than he had the rest of the years that he'd taught at Hogwarts. Of course, that wasn't counting the things that had happened both of the last two Halloweens that had begun Severus and Vesperra's stress for those two years.
His eyes flicked repeatedly to Lupin, who seemed rather cheerful and was having an animated conversation with Flitwick, as he ate, and he wondered if there was a reason the man was so happy…. And a few times, Severus looked at Vesperra, who appeared slightly less annoyed than usual. He assumed she must have had a good time in Hogsmeade, then. A tiny part of him wondered whether she had ignored what he had said a few days before and had actually gone and bought him something. He hoped she hadn't.
When the feast finally ended, Severus was relieved. Dumbledore left the staffroom directly afterwards, as he often did, for a Headmaster's duties were never done. Hardly a minute later, Severus, McGonagall, and Lupin seemed to have thought the same thing at the same time, because they all left in succession out of the staffroom door. McGonagall and Lupin made to go in the direction of the stairs, and Severus to the dungeons, but one of the gargoyles that stood outside the entrance stopped them.
"Oi—you three—Dumbledore went marching up to Gryffindor tower. A portrait told him that the Fat Lady's portrait has been nearly destroyed. He'll want you up there with him…"
The gargoyle's words were lost into the distance as the three teachers headed directly to the staircases without hesitation. They were walking so fast that they were almost running, trying to catch up with Dumbledore, who couldn't have been too far ahead of them….
So… the Fat Lady's portrait was nearly destroyed… Of course it had been too good to be true. This was not going to be a perfectly normal Halloween, no…. Severus momentarily forgot his hatred for the man walking next to him as he strained his mind to think of what could possibly have happened, because something bad had to have happened…. And with his luck, it'll have had something to do with Potter.
His stomach writhed with anxiety and his heart couldn't decide whether to pound very hard or not to pound at all, though Severus was trying to keep it under control until he actually made it there and found out what happened.
After a few minutes, they were in the corridor whose end was the entrance to Gryffindor Tower, with Dumbledore a ways ahead of them and heading towards the large crowd of students standing, confused, in front of it. Gryffindors squeezed together or moved aside to let Dumbledore through, and Severus, McGonagall, and Lupin hurried towards him and inside the gap made by the students so they could see it as well.
Out of breath, Severus stared at the portrait, which was now void of the Fat Lady and looked as though it had been slashed by a knife or sword. The floor in front of it was littered with strips and chunks of the canvas. This brought him a great deal of concern completely separate from his animosity towards Gryffindor house—none of the Hogwarts paintings had ever been purposely destroyed, as far as written history told them. Who could have wanted to get into the Gryffindor Common Room that badly?
Dumbledore turned around, looking very grave, and said immediately, "We need to find her. Professor McGonagall, please go to Mr. Filch at once and tell him to search every painting in the world for the Fat Lady."
Her lips as tight as they could go, McGonagall gave a small nod and started to turn around; she stopped, however, at the sound of the cackling voice of the school poltergeist, Peeves, who everyone looked up at when he spoke.
"You'll be lucky!" he laughed, looking delighted as he bobbed above the crowd of Gryffindors.
"What do you mean, Peeves?" said Dumbledore calmly, his grave expression now with a hint of confusion. Peeves's grin faded a little, likely out of respect for Dumbledore, and he rounded up to hover in a normal standing position.
"Ashamed, Your Headship, sir," said Peeves, now using an oily voice. "Don't want to be seen. She's a horrible mess. Saw her running through the landscape up on the fourth floor, sir, dodging between the trees. Crying something dreadful…. Poor thing," he finished happily.
The entire corridor was utterly silent except for Dumbledore saying quietly, "Did she say who did it?"
"Oh yes, Professorhead. He got very angry when she wouldn't let him in, you see." Severus's heart dropped at that instant, as he suddenly expected the worst and felt sure it was about to be confirmed, and Peeves flipped over and grinned at Dumbledore from between his own legs. "Nasty temper he's got, that Sirius Black."
Several students gasped, suddenly wide-eyed; others stayed silent, the color leaving their faces. McGonagall took this as even more of a reason to get to Filch as soon as possible and left, but Severus did not turn around to see her expression. Instead, he had glanced at Potter, who wasn't difficult to spot in the crowd, since he was up front near the ruined portrait.
For the first time, Severus felt no anger towards the boy, for he had done nothing to put himself in danger this time. The fact that Sirius Black, who wanted to kill him, had somehow gotten into the castle, was not caused at all by Potter being reckless or stupid. Severus was feeling a torrent of things, and at that second, mixed along with the confusion and the monumental hatred for Black was relief that Potter was alive. Sirius Black had been in the castle… or was still in the castle… and if he had come any other day, he might have made it to Potter and killed him….
As expected, Dumbledore took immediate action, and Severus was ready to take the old man's instructions.
"Professor Lupin," he said calmly yet urgently, "please escort the Gryffindors back to the Great Hall, and wait there until I return." He turned to Severus as Lupin, looking even sicker than he had been before taking the Wolfsbane Potion, heeded instructions and made sure that every Gryffindor knew to follow him. "Severus, go down to the dungeons and bring the Slytherins up to the Great Hall. I will alert the other Heads and the rest of the staff."
Giving a sharp nod, Severus strode out of the corridor with Dumbledore, and the two went their separate ways when they came to the end. Severus took his wand out for his own safety, and was getting progressively angrier and more confused as he walked very briskly down to the dungeons. It just didn't make any sense… and yet, he felt he shouldn't have been surprised. Of course this sort of thing had to happen today, on Lily's deathday…. The one day that Severus felt more compelled to protect Potter than any other day was the one where the boy's life was really put in danger. And this was much worse than the troll or the Chamber—there was a murderer in the castle, the same murderer that had betrayed Lily to Voldemort and gotten her killed…
Suddenly, an insane desire burned within him, fueled by loathing both for Black and for himself. He wanted so very badly to do all that he could to make sure that Lily had not died in vain, to get revenge on that bastard, to give the worst of all punishments to the man that had made both his life as a child and as an adult pure hell… Severus, mad as it might be, hoped Black would find him. That would make it a hell of a lot easier to kill him.
But he did not find the man in a span of two and a half minutes, and it was with difficultly forced calm that he gave the blank stretch of stone wall the password and entered the Slytherin Common Room. It felt horribly similar to what he had felt last year, when Ginny Weasley had been taken down into the Chamber of Secrets and he had had to tell all the Slytherins to go pack their things. At least this time, Hogwarts wasn't going to be closed.
The few students that were still in the very nearly empty Common Room were clearly surprised when Severus walked in, and all stared at him.
"Professor Snape—"
"Rouse everyone that's in their dormitories, you four," he told them. "I need to escort all of you back to the Great Hall.
No less expected, they seemed extremely confused, and the seventh year boy who had spoken to him first said, "W—?"
"Sirius Black has broken into the castle," he snapped. Seeing the word forming on the boy's lips, he said impatiently, "Don't ask me how, just hurry and wake everyone up!"
They hastened to obey him then, but they weren't any less confused. Feeling like every second he stood there was a second wasted that could be used searching for Black despite knowing that he had to ensure the students' safety first, Severus waited for the Common Room to fill with every last Slytherin.
As tired as Vesperra was, she willed herself to stay awake so that Severus could talk to her when he got back to his own room. All was calm until the door to her dorm suddenly opened, and both Vesperra and Millicent threw back their bed hangings.
"Hurry up," said the girl who had opened the door urgently, "and get to the Common Room. Professor Snape wants us there." She then ran out, leaving the door open, presumably to do the same to all the other girl's dormitories.
Millicent's mouth hung open for a moment, and she gave Vesperra a look of confusion, probably expecting her to look back. Vesperra, however, did not wait a single moment, and scrambled to get off her bed and down the stone corridor that led to the Common Room. If Severus was here, then something bad must have happened….
The corridor was, for the first time Vesperra had seen it, very crowded. Girls were in their nightgowns, pushing past each other, all looking just as confused as she was. Voices were jumbled together, all trying to figure out what was going on.
"Why are we—?"
"What's Professor Snape—?"
"—got to go back to the Great Hall—"
"—Sirius Black!"
At the various whispers and frightened mutterings of 'Sirius Black,' Vesperra's face hardened. She was suddenly very angry and scared amidst the confusion, and she couldn't even imagine what Severus would be feeling at the moment. She almost didn't want to know.
When everyone was in the Common Room, Severus didn't hesitate. "Is anyone still in their dorm?"
"No," said two people at once, both of whom had been in the Common Room when he first arrived. "We got everyone out, sir."
"Good. Then follow me, I've got to take you all to the Great Hall," said Severus. His eyes swept the crowd quickly for Vesperra, who was looking straight at him, paler than usual. Regretting that he didn't have a chance to speak to her, he turned around and threw the door open, leaving to the dungeons once more. He occasionally looked back to make sure everyone was staying close together, and to catch a glimpse of Vesperra's face. Almost more than anything, he was worried for her safety at the moment; Potter's safety only broke the tie because he was in much more danger of being murdered.
"Is it true that Sirius Black's in the castle?" said Malfoy, who was near the front of the group of Slytherins. There was a nervous murmur of assent, though everyone already seemed sure of the answer.
"Yes," growled Severus. "And before you ask, no one yet knows how."
They passed through the Entrance Hall and into the Great Hall, where the Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs, and some of the teachers including Dumbledore were already waiting. The Ravenclaws joined them a minute later, led by Professor Flitwick.
Severus left the students to go to Dumbledore, who was delegating different parts of the castle to be searched to different members of the staff. He watched the back of Lupin's head as the man left the Great Hall, now with a much better reason to be suspicious of him than he had been earlier that day.
After being given the job of being second-in-command as far as the search went, Severus left with Professor Sprout to search the castle.
Vesperra watched Severus leave, half-hoping that he'd find Black himself, since she knew how much that meant to him, and the other half hoping that another teacher would do it, because she was afraid for him. And she was afraid for herself. But mostly, she was angry at herself for thinking that nothing was going to go wrong this Halloween, and dreading what was to come if Black wasn't caught tonight….
Soon after Severus was gone, Dumbledore walked to the end of the hall and coughed significantly. "The teachers and I need to conduct a thorough search of the castle," he said to everyone. "I'm afraid that, for your safety, you will have to spend the night here. I want the prefects to stand guard over the entrances to the hall and I am leaving the Head Boy and Girl in charge. Any disturbance should be reported to me immediately," he added to Percy Weasley, the Head Boy. "Send word with one of the ghosts."
Professors McGonagall and Flitwick finished closing all the doors into the Great Hall but for one, and Dumbledore started towards the one that was open, but paused. "Oh yes," he said, "you'll be needing…"
He waved his wand and the four House tables flew to stand themselves against the walls, and when he waved it again, the floor was covered with about three hundred squashy purple sleeping bags.
"Sleep well," said Dumbledore, leaving and closing the door behind him.
The hall immediately began to buzz excitedly, completely unlike the dread that Vesperra figured everyone would be feeling. She grabbed a sleeping bag and dragged it well away from the rest of the Slytherins to a spot that was mostly empty for a five-foot radius at the moment, then climbed into it, still fully dressed except for her shoes, which she had kicked off in her dorm, and her House tie, which she had loosened and taken off as well. It seemed that she was one of the only non-Gryffindors that wasn't in pajamas.
Not tired in the least, Vesperra laid on her stomach and rested her chin in her folded arms. From those around her, she could hear the story of what had happened going around. Apparently, Black had tried to get into Gryffindor Tower, but without the password, the Fat Lady wouldn't let him in. He had slashed her painting and she was now hiding, as was Black.
He must have thought he could find Potter in there, thought Vesperra. Severus hadn't directly told her that Black was after Potter, but he might as well have. If Black had served Voldemort secretly, and had lost everything when Voldemort tried to kill Potter as a baby, there was no doubt he wanted to kill Potter now. Why else would he have tried to get into Gryffindor Tower, anyway? Dammit, why couldn't he have come another night? Then he could have killed Potter and been done with it…
But she immediately revoked that thought, because then Black would start seeking out his master and try to return him to power, and that was the last thing Vesperra wanted.
"Everyone into their sleeping bags!" shouted Head Boy Weasley over the conversations. "Come on, now, no more talking! Lights out in ten minutes!"
Vesperra didn't necessarily mind the whispering around her, because it wasn't as though she'd be able to fall asleep anytime soon. At least it gave her a chance to hear other people's theories as to how Black got in, and it kept her mind busy. None of them, though, had any plausible theories. She knew that all sorts of enchantments protected Hogwarts, and then there were the dementors… Someone had to have helped him. And Vesperra was sure she suspected the same person Severus did—the werewolf who was friends with that murderer as a child.
"The lights are going out now!" Weasley shouted. "I want everyone in their sleeping bags and no more talking!"
All at once, the candles went out, and the Great Hall was almost completely dark except for the light from the ghosts, who were drifting about, talking to prefects, and the starlight from the enchanted ceiling. Whispering still filled the hall, but people stopped whenever Weasley walked by and pretended to be asleep. Everyone else was clearly just as likely to fall asleep as Vesperra.
Once every hour, a teacher would walk in to check that everything was quiet. As much as Vesperra liked rules and order, she thought it was rather stupid that they should be kept from talking when no one was going to fall asleep anytime soon, anyway. But she liked it quiet like this, so she wasn't complaining.
Her dread kept her up for what felt like the longest time, simply staring up at the ceiling or laying on her side and listening to others whisper. Around three in the morning, when many students had finally fallen asleep, Dumbledore walked in and crossed the room to get to Weasley. Vesperra couldn't hear what he was saying to the Head Boy, since they were all the way across the hall, but she watched anyway. Minutes later, another one of the Hall doors opened, and—her heart did a tiny leap—it was Severus.
The search was fruitless. Severus did all that he could, checking even the Room of Requirement (in case Black knew about it) and the secret passageway in the dungeons. It was three in the morning before he returned to the Great Hall, angry that he had missed his chance, yet resigned to the fact that Black was no longer in the castle.
When he pushed open the door to the Great Hall and walked in, Dumbledore was in there, and speaking to Percy Weasley. Severus's footsteps echoed through the silent hall as he walked over to them.
"Headmaster?" said Severus as Dumbledore turned his grave face to him. "The whole of the third floor has been searched. He's not there. And Filch has done the dungeons; nothing there either."
"What about the Astronomy Tower?" said Dumbledore. "Professor Trelawney's room? The Owlery?"
"All searched…"
"Very well, Severus. I didn't really expect Black to linger."
"Have you any theory as to how he got in, Professor?" asked Severus evenly, hoping both to see what Dumbledore's mind could come up with that his hadn't, and to make him see that he made a horrible mistake hiring Lupin.
"Many, Severus, each of them unlikely as the next," Dumbledore replied, appearing to have guessed what was on Severus's mind and to be avoiding it. Weasley was staring at them with rapt attention so that Severus was even more annoyed.
His expression one of controlled anger, Severus continued quietly, "You remember the conversation we had, Headmaster, just before—ah—the start of term?" He would have spoken more plainly, directly telling the old man that he needed to believe his suspicions, but Weasley was only feet away. So he barely opened his lips and inched away from him and closer to Dumbledore, hoping to block Weasley out of it and that the boy would get the hint.
"I do, Severus," said Dumbledore with clear warning in his voice. His eyes weren't twinkling now, but were hard-set.
"It seems—almost impossible—that Black could have entered the school without inside help. I did express my concerns when you appointed—"
"I do not believe a single person inside this castle would have helped Black enter it," said Dumbledore with an end-of-discussion tone. Severus didn't reply or even open his mouth again, but he was raging against Dumbledore in his mind. "I must go down to the dementors," he continued. "I said I would inform them when our search was complete."
"Didn't they want to help, sir?" said Weasley.
"Oh yes," said Dumbledore with a colder voice than Severus had ever heard him use. "But I'm afraid no dementor will cross the threshold of this castle while I am headmaster."
Without another word, Dumbledore left the Great Hall quickly and quietly. Severus stared at him with deep resentment (his expression was nothing compared to what he was feeling, though) as he did. How could the man be so foolish? He trusted too easily… Why couldn't he spare a second thought for the possibility that Lupin might not be the man Dumbledore thought he was? He was a werewolf, after all….
Vesperra didn't hear what Severus had said to Dumbledore, but from where she was laying, she could see his profile, which was quite angry. He turned abruptly and his robes billowed out behind him as he walked towards the exit that would lead to the shortest way to the dungeons; to do so, he had to pass right by her, and she seized her chance.
As he neared the door on his way out, Severus suddenly felt something tugging on the hem of his robes and looked down in alarm. He was relieved to see that it was Vesperra, who was laying on her side, but at the same time trying to look up at him. For a moment, he thought she must be mad for trying to talk to him here and now, but one glance around told him that everyone around her was apparently asleep, and no Slytherins were near.
Letting go of his robes as he looked down, Vesperra mouthed, breathing the words very slightly, "Did you find him?"
Severus shook his head, frowning. He inconspicuously—in case anyone was still awake and looking—patted his ribcage, where Vesperra knew he kept his journal in his robes, and mouthed, "Tell you tomorrow. Go to sleep."
"Night," she mouthed, wishing she could talk to him more right now.
"Night." He resisted the urge to bend down and kiss her forehead or caress her face briefly as he'd have done if the circumstances were different, and continued out the doors.
Once the door creaked shut and Severus was no longer in sight, Vesperra relaxed and found a comfortable position to lie in. She rested her head in her arms and, mentally exhausted, actually tried to fall asleep.
I've been waiting a long time to write this chapter... There's so much Snape in Prisoner of Azkaban that a lot of the chapters in Book 3 will be based on canon events. And... I might have gotten carried away with Vesperra's time in Hogsmeade. But whatever. I want to go to Honeydukes so freaking bad... Oh, and I hope no one found the Blood Pop thing too creepy.
I suppose you guys will have a lot of things to say, and a lot of things to theorize about... so PLEASE review! And draw fan art if you want too... because that would be awesome!