38
Bella's eyes filled up with tears as she stood there staring into the dark eyes on her father's face. He was looking at her, right at her. For three years, she'd wanted this, waited for this, prayed for this, and now that he was, Bella wasn't sure what to do. Pulling her hand out of his hand, she shifted her body back toward him and brought her hands up to his face, watching as Charlie's eyes closed and he leaned into her touch.
The dam inside of her broke, causing her tears to cascade down her cheeks as her knees buckled and she once again found herself kneeling next to her father. Her lips parted and she tried to call out to him, but once again, nothing but silence could be heard. Frantically, Bella looked over at Esme, who seemed to have frozen as she watched their father come to life right in front of her.
Bella reached for Esme with one hand, snapping her fingers to get her attention. Esme rushed over to Bella and Charlie, wrapping her arm around Bella's waist and bringing her hand up to Charlie's face. He shifted his eyes from Bella to Esme and back.
"Daddy," Esme wept. "Oh, Daddy."
"Charlie!" Renee yelled from the hallway, and Bella looked in horror at the doorway, afraid of what her mother would do if she saw her kneeling in front of her father again.
However, when Bella attempted to stand up, Charlie reached out and grabbed her hand, pulling her back down. She turned back to him, finding tears in his eyes, just like they were in hers. Bella's mouth opened, and she desperately wanted to say something to him, beg him to say something to her, but they both simply stared at one another.
"Renee, stop!" Kate called out, and everyone turned to the doorway just in time to see Renee rush into the room. Her eyes were wide and wild, filled with rage and anger. She growled as she leapt toward Bella and Esme, who had wrapped her arms around Bella and pulled her back against the wall in front of Charlie's chair.
"Stupid, fucking little whore!" Renee screamed, fighting against Kate and Carlisle, who had moved so that he was between all of them. They wrestled her down to the floor, both them struggling to keep Renee from hitting them, from scratching and clawing at them.
"We need help in here!" Carlisle yelled, holding Renee's arms against the floor while Kate pressed the call button for the nurses' desk. A minute later, two orderlies and three nurses, plus a doctor came rushing into the room.
"Leave me alone, cocksuckers!" Renee screeched. "That little whore keeps giving him her pussy. I'll teach that bitch whose pussy Charlie wants. He's mine! All mine!"
The nurses and orderlies held Renee down while the doctor gave her a sedative. Renee continued to scream and curse, calling Bella the most horrid names she'd ever heard for a few minutes before her voice began to slur and she drifted to sleep.
"Get her back to her room," Carlisle ordered, standing up. "Strap her down, and call Dr. Gerandy. Her violent behavior is escalating. I want a full battery of tests ran on her as soon as possible."
"Yes, Doctor Cullen," Kate said as the orderlies lifted Renee off the floor and laid her on the gurney they'd brought with them. Once they were gone, Carlisle turned back to Bella, Esme, and Charlie.
Esme had Bella wrapped in her arms, one hand on the back of her head while the other was on her cheek, trying to keep her from getting hurt. It was the same way her sister would hold her when shew as a little girl and watching a scary movie because she had convinced her parents she was old enough to watch with Emmett and Esme, even though she wasn't. Even though she had nightmares for a month. It was the same way they'd held her the night Charlie and Renee fell from the fire escape, and Bella learned she had cancer.
"You two okay?" Carlisle asked, walking around the bed and squatting next to Charlie, but his eyes were locked on Esme.
"Yes . . . no." She laughed. "I don't know." Leaning back, Esme looked down at Bella. "Butterbean, you okay?"
Bella shook her head, because she wasn't okay, and it wasn't just because of her mother, either. She turned and looked up at Charlie, who was still watching her. She pulled herself out of Esme's embrace and onto her knees, placing her hands on the side of Charlie's face again.
"Daddy," Esme said, kneeling next to Bella. Charlie shifted his eyes to her. "Daddy, can you hear me? Nod if you can hear me."
Slowly, almost to the point of being painful, Charlie's head tilted down and then moved back upward.
"Oh, Daddy," Esme cried, leaning up and giving him a hug. His right arm wrapped around her, while his left laid motionless.
"Esme," Carlisle murmured, causing her to look back at him. "Can I . . ." He trailed off as he gestured toward Charlie.
"Oh, yes, of course," she murmured, scooting backward. Once again, Bella attempted to stand up, only to have Charlie grab her arm and keep her next to him. Esme reached around Bella, covering their father's hand with hers. "Daddy, it's okay. This is Carlisle, he's your doctor. We're gonna be right here."
Charlie's eyes shifted from Esme to Bella, over to Carlisle, who had dropped to his knees next to him. He released Bella's arm, but she didn't move.
"Butterbean, come on," Esme whispered, trying to help Bella to her feet, but she shook her head. "Butterbean," she said again.
However, Bella turned and looked at her as she brought her hands up and signed, "I am not leaving him. Call Emmett. Call Rose and Jasper and Alice. They need to be here, but I am not leaving him."
Esme nodded. "Okay, okay. Just be careful with your port. Please?"
This time Bella nodded, and turned back to Charlie, who was watching her with wide eyes. She tried to smile as she reached over and placed her hand on his cheek.
While Esme pulled out her cell phone and stepped out into the hallway to call Emmett, Bella noticed the way Edward stood next to the door, like he wasn't sure whether he should stay or go, or what. He looked at her, giving her a soft smile before pushing off the door frame and walking around the bed, sitting on the edge. His hand came up to his chest, and Bella worried about how much stress he was putting on himself.
"Charlie," Carlisle said, drawing Bella's father attention to him. He pulled out a pen light and held his finger up in front of his face. "Look directly at my finger."
While Carlisle examined Charlie's vision, having him follow his finger as he moved it from side to side and then up and down, Bella knelt next to him, keeping her hand on his face, his shoulder, his arm, any part of him that she could touch. Three years. Three long years of waiting and hoping, praying and wishing, but never having her father look at her, not really. Now, all she wanted was to touch him.
Well, that wasn't all she wanted. She wanted to tell him that she loved him, that she'd missed him. She wanted to tell him about Edward, about her cancer, about how scared and lost she'd felt for three years. But she couldn't. The words were locked inside of her.
"Okay, Charlie, can you say your name?" Carlisle asked.
Charlie's lips parted. "Ch . . . cha . . ." Huffing, he shook his head.
"It's okay. It's been awhile," Carlisle murmured, placing his hand on his Bella's shoulder. "Do you know her? Can you tell me her name?"
Charlie's eyes flittered to her and his lips quivered. "But . . . butter . . . butterbean."
Tears flooded Bella's eyes and spilled down her face as she leaned her head on his knee. In an instant, Charlie's hand was on the back of her head, but then he gasped and pulled his hand back. When she leaned up, she saw strains of her hair wrapped in his hand. His eyes were wide and full of fear. She leaned up and placed her hands on his face while looking at Carlisle or Edward to say something, to make him understand.
"I want to run a few test, okay?" Carlisle asked. Charlie's head bobbed up and down, his eyes still locked on the hair in his hand. "She's sick, Charlie."
He shifted his attention to Carlisle. "Bella, I mean. She's sick. She has cancer."
Charlie's face crumbled and he began to shake his head. "No . . . No . . . No!"
As he writhed in his seat, Bella fell backward, hitting her head against the wall. In a heartbeat, Edward was by her side, on his knees with his arms wrapped around her. "It's okay, baby, it's okay."
"Esme!" Carlisle yelled, and a moment later, Esme was back into the room, her phone still perched against her ear. "Get Kate!"
"Okay," she murmured, her eyes never leaving their father, who was in hysterics. Carlisle had grabbed both his arms and was holding him down, and he had moved so that he was directly in front of him. A moment later, Kate came rushing back into Charlie's room.
"Get Bella and Edward out of there," Carlisle ordered. Bella began to shake her head, but Carlisle said, "I've got him. I promise. I just need you to wait outside. Please, Bella."
Though she didn't want to leave the room, leave her father, she allowed Kate to help her to her feet. Once Edward was standing, he wrapped his arm around her waist and led out of the room. Esme was leaning against the wall, one hand covering her mouth while the other was pressed against her chest. Bella reached out and placed her hand on her sister's shoulders, causing the woman to look over at her.
"Oh, Butterbean," she wailed, drawing her into her embrace. "Can you believe it?"
Bella shook her head because she couldn't believe it. After three years, her father was . . . lucid? Was that the correct term? Was he back to normal, back to being the same Charlie Swan who he had been the second before the fire escape detached from the hotel and plummeted to the ground? Bella knew no matter what Charlie would never be the same. Like she'd never be the same Bella, the same girl she was.
"Butterbean," Esme murmured, and Bella leaned back, looking up at her. "Are you okay?"
She shook her head and brought her hands up in front of her. "No, I am not okay. He's back. I don't know how to feel."
"Yeah, me either," she said, shifting her eyes to Edward. "You need to sit down."
"I'm fine," he lied. Bella knew it, Esme knew it. Hell, even Edward knew it.
"None of us are fine, Edward," Esme quipped, before walking down to the nurses' station. She came back with two rolling chairs and pushed them against the wall outside of Charlie's room. "Both of you sit."
Bella glared at Esme but sat down, feeling the weariness from a long, tiring day. Just an hour ago she had been laying on a table having beams of radiation shot at her throat, and now, her father had come back to her. Bella shifted her eyes back to Esme, and signed, "Phil?"
"I called his office," she murmured. "He was with a patient, so I left a message for him to call me."
Bella nodded and looked over at Edward, who had his head back against the wall. His eyes were closed, but she could tell he wasn't asleep. Reaching over, she wrapped her fingers around his. Edward smiled and lobbed his head to the side, looking right at her.
"Hey," he whispered. She returned his smile and shifted in her chair so that she was facing him. He did the same, placing his hands on her hips. "Big day, huh?"
Bella sighed, nodding.
"You told me about them, but I didn't understand. Not until I saw them. Watching you lying your head on his knee . . . I just . . . I never got it. How much it hurt for you to lose them. My parents are dead, but yours . . . yours were right there, but at the same time, they were not there."
Bella bit her lip and nodded.
The sound of the elevator opening drew their attention down the hallway, and Bella watched as Emmett, Rose, Jasper, and Alice rushed off. Emmett's eyes met hers, and she saw the mixture of fear and hope on his face.
"What the hell is going on?" he demanded, rushing down to them. "Dad's coherent?"
"So it seems," Esme murmured, and then proceeded to tell him, Rose, Jasper, and Alice everything that had happened since they'd stopped by to visit their parents, including Renee's outburst. Edward kept his fingers wrapped around hers, and she knew he was trying to keep her together, to keep her from falling apart. But how could she not? Her father had defeated the odds and had come back to them? Was this a sign? Was this God's way of trying to tell her that she, too, would be a survivor? What were the odds that she'd be able to beat cancer and that Charlie would stay with her? That Renee would become her mother again, that Bella would get everything she ever wanted?
"This is . . ." Emmett shook his head and looked over at Bella. "Butterbean, you okay?"
She cocked an eyebrow at him, causing him to smile.
"Stupid question."
She nodded because it was more than stupid. Nothing in Bella's life was okay, nothing but the man holding her hands, and even if he wasn't okay. Carlisle and Kate walked out of Charlie's room, and Kate said, "Yes, Doctor," before hustling down the hallway to the nurses' desk. Bella watched as she picked up the phone and started to make a phone call.
"Is he okay?" Esme asked, drawing Bella's attention away from Kate.
"He's asleep. He was very agitated, so we had to sedate him," Carlisle explained, dragging his hand through his hair.
"When he wakes up, will he be . . . coherent again?" Emmett asked, and Bella could hear the longing in his words.
"I don't know," Carlisle admitted. "I'm going to run some tests, see if anything has changed since his last round of tests. There were no indications of what caused him to be in a catatonic state. I just . . . I don't know. I'm sorry."
"It's okay," Esme murmured, wrapping her arms around him and laying her head on his chest.
Bella stood up and walked over to the doorway, leaning against the frame and watched her father sleeping in his bed. Edward placed one hand on her hip, and a moment later, she felt his lips on the top of her head.
"Butterbean, you should go home," Emmett said, causing everyone to look at him. He was staring at Bella. "You need to rest."
But Bella shook her head and looked back at Charlie.
"Butterbean," Emmett began.
"No," she signed, her hands flying up in front of her. "I have to be here. He needs me here."
"Butterbean," he started again, but clamped his lips together when Edward slammed a hand on the wall.
"She said she's staying," he snarled, looking over at him. "She needs to be here. She needs to be here with him, so just . . . stop and let her."
Bella turned and faced him, placing her hand on his chest. The last thing she needed was for him to hurt because he was defending her. Edward blew out a heavy breath and looked down at her. "I'm okay."
Nodding, Bella turned back to her brother and signed, "I know you don't understand, that you're scared that I can't handle it if he wakes up and isn't lucid again. But I can't leave here without knowing if he's really back or if it was just a fluke. Please, just . . . just don't make this an issue, Emmett. Please?"
"Okay, okay," he said, putting his hands up. "But you need to sit. You're feeling okay right now because you're pumped with adrenalin, the excitement of what if might happen, but you need to rest. So sit your ass down, or I'm calling Phil and having him admit you."
Bella rolled her eyes, but signed, "Fine. Whatever. You're a bully."
"I call it being your brother." Emmett smirked as he grabbed the chair she'd been sitting in and pushed it toward her. "Now sit."
Knowing Emmett wasn't going to stop nagging, she grabbed the chair and pulled it into her father's room, right up next to his bed. As she sat down, she wrapped her fingers around his, and hoped like hell that when he woke up, he wouldn't be lost again. She needed her father.
Thank you for all the reviews. Now, I don't know about you all, but Charlie's breaking my heart here. Will he be coherent when he wakes up?