title taken from: "Stupid" by Brendan McLean

not so happy about this one... though as i'm currently on Easter Holidays, I'll hopefully have more time to write the next few chapters.

oh, and to the Guest who pointed out the mistake in the last chapter - thank you! its all fixed now :))

The crisp, early February air gave Pam's skin a pleasant tingle as she walked across the grass from her building to the cafeteria. This day was set to be a good day - her usual History class had been cancelled practically last-minute by Mr. Scott, which meant that she had almost the entire day to herself until her next class at 4. She was planning to pick up something from the cafeteria as a sort of brunch, before retiring to her dorm room for a while to call her mom or study.

The entrance to the main building was in sight. Distantly, she heard the sound of someone running across the crunchy grass. Figuring it was a morning jogger or something, she ignored it, and simply ploughed on.

However, the runner got closer, the heavy footsteps louder, and finally, Pam gave in.

As soon as she turned, however, she regretted it.

"Oh, hey! Pam, right? Pam Beesly?"

Ah, shoot.

"Hi," she replied, awkwardly.

Karen Filipelli jogged closer. She definitely planned this. "I was hoping to see you, today, actually."

"Well, we do have class at quarter to 5…"

"I know, I know." Karen laughed, ignoring her companion's awkwardness. "I just wanted to speak to you before class."

"Oh."

"Yeah, um." The two fell into step. Apparently Karen was going the same way. They stomped in silence for a terrible, prolonged moment, until the other girl managed to find her words once more. "So, like, you and Jim used to be friends, right?"

It was the used to part that really stung. Was that the way he described their old relationship? After his forced discussion the previous week, chasing her down the hallway, she assumed he still wanted to be… Well. Friends.

She made herself do a stiff little nod. "Sure."

"I mean, what am I saying, right? You're still friends." Karen laughed, seemingly picking up on Pam's aversion to her phrasing.

"I guess."

"Anyway," she continued. At least the building was growing ever closer. Once there, perhaps Pam could make an excuse that she had class or something. This conversation didn't appear to be leading to anything good. "I was wondering if you could… Give me some advice."

"Advice?" Pam slowed her steps, turning to face her companion for the first time since Karen joined her. "What do you mean?"

"Like, on how to deal with him."

"Is everything - alright, between you two? I don't mean to pry, but-"

"No, no, it's okay. You're not prying, I mean. We're-" Karen cut herself off with a sigh. "I just feel like… Like I'm more invested in our whole thing than he is. I'm always the one making the first move, right, and I just - he isn't - ugh."

Unsure of what to say, Pam merely nodded. What Karen was telling her was certainly interesting. It wasn't as though she was expecting this to happen - really, she wasn't - but in hindsight it did seem sort of inevitable that they would run into problems at some point or another.

Shamefully tamping down her inner smugness, she tried to school her expression into something more sympathetic. "I'm sure you guys will be fine. He's probably just going through a weird phase."

Karen made a noncommittal, disbelieving sort of noise.

They were so close to the building. Just another minute or so of the other girl's company, then she could make her excuses and leave.

To her pleasant surprise, the two walked practically in silence the rest of the way. Karen seemingly had nothing else to say on the matter, but apparently still wished for Pam's company. Perhaps it was a solidarity kind of thing. Having never experienced anything like this in a relationship before, Pam could only guess.

Except, had she? She remembered how, in the beginning of their relationship, she was almost constantly plagued by a certain fear to do with Roy. How he felt about her, what he saw in her; what made him, the somewhat-jock with a steadily rising number of friends, wish to spend time with her. At the start, she always held off a little on him. She never wanted to scare him away, and so to avoid causing any conflict, she would silence herself and sacrifice her own thoughts and opinions to placate his potential own.

God. If what Karen was currently feeling was just a fraction of what Pam had felt all those years ago, perhaps she should offer some assistance. (Even if the thought of contributing, even in some small way, to the other girl's relationship to her former friend was enough to give her a strange, almost empty feeling in her stomach.)

So when they reached the doors of the building, Pam scrapped the half-hearted apology/excuse combo on her lips and asked, instead: "Do you want to come to the cafeteria with me? We can talk properly there, if you want."

Relief flooded Karen's face, though she tried to remain polite. "Are you sure it's not too much trouble?"

"Not at all," Pam replied. Upon realising how still her voice sounded, she tried again. "I mean, I' be happy to give you some advice."

"Thanks." The two crossed the small entrance hall, entering the cafeteria on the left.

Inside, it wasn't particularly busy. Most people at this time of day had already eaten breakfast and were in class, so the few stragglers that were in the room mostly kept to themselves, utilising the place to study or chat with their friends over coffee.

Which, apparently, was exactly what Pam was about to do.

Karen chose a booth-like table, far enough away from the other occupiers that no one would be able to hear their talk. Pam sat down opposite her, and tried to figure out what to do with her hands.

"So, what did you want to…?"

"Oh! Um," Karen began, setting her phone face down on the table. Perhaps, Pam mused, because she was expecting him to text her. "I just… Like, we started dating over Christmas break, right?"

Christmas break?!

A new surge of indignation flooded Pam. Christmas break. She spent so much time, then, going over what happened on their last night of school in her head, thinking of every little option she could have said or done, feeling absolutely awful for him, wanting to apologise… And all the while, he was dating another girl.

"Um. Yeah. Sure." She muttered in reply, not really remembering what Karen was trying to talk about.

"It's been, well, nice… I mean, at first I thought he just wanted tot make things slow, y'know, 'cause it's a new relationship, but now…" She broke off with a sigh. "I mean, I like him and stuff, but I just don't know how he feels about me."

"Uh-huh." Pam nodded.

It wasn't that she didn't feel bad for Karen, but…

But?

Was there really any sentiment to follow that up?

After all, had Karen ever (intentionally) acted anything but civil to her?

With a jolt, Pam realised that, ever since the beginning of the semester, she had just been acting very… Cold, to Karen. Did she really have any excuse for that?

Blissfully ignorant of her companion's thoughts, Karen continued on, mentioning the few relevant facts about her relationship.

"…And I just want advice. Like, what should I do? He's not putting any effort in, but I don't wanna break up, but I want him to know how I feel, but… Ugh!" She slumped down on the table, resting her head (perhaps uncomfortably) on the linoleum surface.

"I think…" Pam began, as her thoughts began to calm down. "I think you need to talk to him. Like, really talk to him. He needs to know how you feel." When Karen didn't look up, she added, hastily: "I mean, I know I've not been much help, but i just-"

"No, no, you're right." Karen finally said, lifting her head from the table. "You're right. And… Thank you." She shot the other girl a grateful smile. "I'll try to find him when he's out of class."

"You're welcome."

"Seriously, it's great to have a friend who I can just… Talk about all this stuff to." Karen admitted. "I mean, most of my closer friends here are dudes."

"Really?" Pam asked, intrigued. When they were in class together, she always seemed to be talking to the other women.

Karen nodded emphatically, before looking around. After shooting a somewhat apologetic glance to her companion, she said: "I guess I should probably get going, now." She checked her watch. "I think… He's almost out of Spanish."

Discreetly, Pam checked the time on her phone, making sure to keep it in her lap under the table where Karen couldn't see. She was right - it was almost the end of his class.

(It sort of weirded her out how well she still knew his timetable, even after having had no reason to for the past few months.)

"I guess I'll - see you around, then?"

"Yeah, 'course! I'll see you in class." Karen gave her a thousand-watt smile and, almost impulsively, reached out to hug her. "And, thanks, you know. For everything."

"You're welcome." Pam replied, awkwardly patting her new friend's back.

When she was apparently satisfied, Karen took off to the opposite exit of the cafeteria.

Pam watched until she had turned the corner, then gathered up her things and left through the other door.