Juti's POV

Erik was noticeably much kinder to me after the slap I received from him, and he was seemingly worried about my mental and physical state, very much so. I, to be honest, was a bit of angry about the slap, but I also could understand why I got it. Though, I agreed with Erik: he should not always react with aggression if he is hurt. Though I knew how Erik was, and so I wasn't at all surprised about it happened, and for some reason, I still did not think I wished to leave him now. This was partly my fault, unlike the wine bottle issue which I still considered to be unrighteous, and was way more hurt about that back then.

Maybe I was blinded by love, and the fact I wanted to understand Erik's past and actions, and I maybe always wished to search for excuses not to be angry with him, but I thought Erik was really trying to be better, unlike his actions in Leroux. If everything was true as it was written, which thing Erik did never for a hundred percent comfirm to me if asked, but he once stated "most of what I know from that story is close to reality" and knowing Erik did not really like to admit his sins and faults as they were, I think, it was just as how Leroux wrote it indeed, then Erik really changed a lot in the past months. He was more likely to admit he did something wrong and apologize for it, he really was trying not to lose his patience which was sometimes hard with me I know, and he understood that love wasn't about controlling what others do. If we see this all compared to the slap, I do believe we are on the right path and he developed much mentally. I believed in him, and knew he will be able to turn to a much better person, as he really wanted to, and I was willing to help him with that. To be honest I thought it will be a much harder thing to do, yet maybe we were to share some more hard moments, but I knew if we really wanted, we could fight to reach our goal.

Erik, now to gain my forgiveness completely, was showing, I do believe, honest signs of remorse, and tried to make up for his earlier actions. Erik was strange in this aspect, as he at first just took care of my wound and looked like he was still hurt or a bit of angry at least, and I felt he agreed a bit with me about I deserved the slap, but after some hours passed, especially whenever he looked at my face, he made a guilty face and he had to wipe his eyes from tears. To be honest, I did not comfort him too much about it. It was a good sign he seemed to feel guilt about a wrong action he had done, and I did not wish to make him believe it was okay by comforting him. Erik's main flaw was exactly the worked lack of empathy and thinking he could do anything he wanted to others if his mood or interests were in need of it. I was sure he wasn't completely lacking compassion, it was just hard for him to show it after a life he was going through, and I knew it was crucial to his survival earlier, and I did not have illusions about Erik will turn to a cinnamon roll if I love him for years. I only hoped he will be able to learn the differences between right and wrong and know what not to do, and be a bit less anti social in general, yet I knew he will always be grumpy and will most likely hate most of the people. But at least if he won't murder or beat up anyone who makes him upset or jealous, that would be a great enough achievement.

After some hours passed, Erik now seemed to understand what he did, and asked me to forgive him, many times, on his knees and kissed my hands. That was how it started. Then he tried in every possible ways to get me into a better mood, showing card and more magic tricks to me, reading to me, playing my favorite classical pieces on the piano, and treating me in general like a princess. To tell the truth, I liked it, but I did not want him to think all he had to do after some possible physical or mental abuse was just to be kinder to me, and all is forgotten. I wanted him to see and understand he can't make everything heal just by kind words after the problem already happened. Erik wasn't a stupid person and understood the reason behind my unusual silence.

- Are you afraid Erik was going to hurt you again? – He walked close to the sofa I was sitting on, hiding his hands behind his back, and he was nervously sweeping the tip of his shoe against the carpet, like a child who was going to be punished by Mother.

- Not now. – I replied. – Well, Erik, I know… that I hurt you as well and… well I know why you slapped me and I understand and will try my best not to make you so angry, but… but… you know what I want to say?

- However angry Erik is he shall not hit Juti. You are absolutely right. Erik does not want to hit Juti. He only lost his mind… and… he did not want to hit her.

- I know Erik, but you shall find a way not to lose your mind so much. You know… you have your common sense, right?

- Right. – He nodded. – I hope so at least. One can never be sure with Erik.

- Anyway, this is what makes a person different from an animal, isn't it? Animals often act out of instinct. You can think.

- True, yet Erik thinks animals are many times better than the species calling themselves as "human beings". Yet I see your point and agree that a gentleman shall never lose his patience against a woman he loves.

- I would word it rather he shall not lose his patience against anyone.

- You… ask too much in that aspect. Erik only promises he will never ever again hurt Juti in any possible way, he will make sure he won't raise a finger against you, no matter what shall happen, he shall not hit you, my dear, ever. Do you believe him?

- I hope you make up to your promises now. – I pointed at him. – You said promises were for fools, did you not?

- I did say that, though I don't… wholeheartedly agree with this statement any longer. At least not in the meaning of keeping my promises I make to you. To you, I shall keep all the promises I make.

- Only me?

- Only you. – He nodded, and his eyes reflected strictness. – Erik is not going to obey anyone else but you. He is similar to a wild horse. He is hard to tame and obeys only the person he trusts.

- It is good enough. – I nodded, knowing it is more than Erik had ever admitted or considered to at least try. – Then… you don't need to promise it any more today or any day. Just you need to remember and keep it. Deal? – I reached out for a handshake which he accepted.

- Deal. – He accepted my handshake with a nod.

Good enough start. I hope we will be able to go further, as Erik developed much in these months.

The next day in the morning he asked me to dress for a walk, then gently took my arm when I got done with dressing up, and said we were going to see someone, as he wished to introduce me to him. He calmed me he was a good friend of his for more than 20 years and that I shall not be afraid of him as he is a very kind man and is very good in his occupation. I did not know who it might be, I only knew about the Daroga as Erik's friend, but as Erik was clearly stating he wished to introduce me to him, he must be someon completely new. We had to go by coach for some time, and when we stopped I saw only a house similar to the other ones in Paris, it reminded me of the house at the Rue de Rivoli, but we weren't going to that direction. It wasn't either too far or too near.

We walked some more in the street and when Erik turned to open a door for me I noticed a medium sized board on the wall which said:

Docteur Bonsanté, Alain

As I knew that lawyers were addressed as "maître" in Fench, either in talking or written, and did not have to be confused with doctors, as in Hungary, where both a doctor and lawyer could be called as "Dr.", I already knew we arrived to a medical doctor's office. I did not know why though. As we stepped into the smaller apartment's hall which was the waiting room of a doctor's office, Erik reassuringly nodded at me to just go further inside.

- Why are we here? – I asked.

- I wish him to take a look at you. – He said penitently.

- Why? You are a doctor. You already did.

- I would feel more comfortable if another doctor says you were all right. – He sighed. – I want to be sure.

- Just to make sure?

- Yes, it would make me feel better. Anyway I wanted to introduce you to him already.

The door to the treatment room opened and a man peeked outside to see if someone was there.

- Good morning, Doctor. – Erik greeted him with a nod.

- Oh, is that you? – The man asked, seemingly with a hint of annoyance. – Finally you changed your mind and allow me to take a look at you?

- I am fine. – Erik waved dismissingly in the air.

- You had lost weight and you don't look that well. – The doctor stated. – I already told you yesterday.

- And I already answered it is just because I had a case of an indigestion. – Erik snorted with impatience. – Look at her instead, please, she is the girl I was talking to you about yesterday.

Erik and the doctor, of course, were talking in French and it was strange the doctor consequently addressed Erik as "tu", but Erik, even in this short time period yet, kept changing between "tu" and "vous", but it was his habit anyways, he did it to the Daroga as well. Anyone but me as I noticed, he stuck with "tu" with me. It was also strange that Erik had spoken to the doctor about me. What did he say?

- Good morning, Mademoiselle! – The doctor greeted me with delight, only noticing me at that time as I was standing halfway behind Erik's back. – Doctor Alain Bonsanté, at your service. Come closer please I don't bite. – He smiled.

I smiled and greeted him too, and introduced myself while being led into his office. Erik followed me to give me strength emotionally, as I thought. The doctor was a middle aged man, presumably kind of the same age as Erik was, he was shorter than Erik, but an average male height, a bit of overweight, especially on the stomach, had a darker complexion, black wavy hair, balding at the top of his head, he wore glasses which had fingerprints on them from a lot of adjustments, and his white shirt was badly in need of ironing. He gave the impression of being a nice man who did not think too much about his appearance though. He did not wear a tie which was nearly unimaginable among males of the time period. His gestures were elegant, and it made a funny contrast with his untidy appearance. Another funny thing was his name meant "Good health" in French. Just the perfect name for a doctor, I daresay. Nome nest omen as Latin says. All in all he had a pleasant impression on me, I felt I was safe with him.

- How are we doing today, Mademoiselle? – He smiled, leaning closer to me, examining me with routine.

- I am… well, thank you. – I said, after a bit of thinking. – Erik is worried aout this smaller injury. – I pointed at the area under my nose. – This is why he wished you to look at me.

- And how did you receive that said injury? – He asked with a sudden suspicion, turning to Erik.

- I fell. – I replied quickly. – I fell against the piano.

- And how did that happen? – The doctor turned back to me with a sigh. – It is hard to imagine such a scenario.

- I tripped. – I said.

- No. – Erik corrected. – I slapped her and she fell. Tell the truth.

I gasped. How come Erik told the truth? I wished to protect him from all of this.

- I could have sworn. – Bonsanté replied. – Were you strong enough to hit a woman? Aren't you ashamed of yourself, you old drunkard?

- I wasn't drunk this time, yet I am really ashamed of myself. – He replied softly, his voice breaking from nearly crying.

- Don't cry. – Bonsanté warned strictly. – It is not you to be pitied here this time. Be a man and face the consequences of your actions.

- This is why I am here. Tell me please how is she…?

With a sigh, Bonsanté turned back to me and examined the injury. He asked me to open my mouth, and he checked my nose. After some minutes, he kindly informed me we were done, and asked me if I felt good any other way. As I said yes, he turned to Erik and coldly informed him about my howabouts.

- Her nose is a bit swollen, but not broken. She lost a tooth and her lip has a smaller wound. Did you take care of it?

- Yes. – He nodded.

- At least you are a quite good doctor, just a bad person. Calming to know.

- I know. – He sighed deeply.

I did not object- I understood that Erik took me there exactly for this reason – to receive a lesson by getting humiliated about an act of his by someone else than the Daroga. He did not take the Persian's insults seriously any more, as they were simply too common for him already. He wished someone to inform him about what he did was terribly wrong. After some pause Erik inquired:

- Did I think right it does not need to be sewn?

- No. It will heal. To your luck.

- Will it leave a mark…? – He asked with his voice trembling yet again.

- Not likely. Maybe some smaller one you only notice when looking closely. – Bonsanté said with routine. – Why? – He changed his tone to an accusing one again. – Will you not like her with a face like that, hm?

- I will love her no matter what. – Erik replied brokenly.

- Oh! So that is how you act towards someone you LOVE? What do you do to someone you hate then?

- I would rather not tell. – Erik replied darkly.

- I can imagine. – The doctor snorted. – Do not drink yourself under the table again. You had problems with it before, remember? We both know how you can be after a few extra glasses.

- She does know as well. – Erik informed softly.

- Oh, so you already introduced yourself?

- I did. But I swear to God and to all that matters in the eyes of everyone that it was the very last time Erik had done something like this to her. – He repeated his promise in front of the doctor.

- I would recommend you so, because one more time you bring her to my office like this, or in a worse condition, and I swear I make sure you will get jailed for a few days for hurting a lady. – The doctor barked.

- I understand and shall deserve it.

- Good. You seem to grow a brain finally?

- Trying to. – Erik nodded.

- Good. Now, go away and do not dare to hit her one more time. And you, Mademoiselle, please don't be afraid and feel free to contact me anytime you need a doctor's services and assistance. In any case.

I thanked him with a smile, said goodbye and walked outside to the waiting room to find Erik sitting on the sofa there. He was looking at his shoes brokenly, with tears forming in his eyes. He buried his forehead in his open right palm, and closed and opened his eyes repeatedly. When he noticed I was there, he silently and rather ceremoniously stood up, took my arm and led me to the street outside. We were slowly and quietly walking on the street, in the light nearly springlike weather of late February. People were walking around us, some alone, some of them were couples or whole families, taking the hand of small children. Erik was watching couples and families with a strange yearning glance for a second, then he always turned his sight away from them, but looking at me finally made him smile.

- Erik… - I started.

- Yes? – He was still speaking softly, and looked at me anxiously.

- Thank you for taking me to a doctor.

- It is… the least. – He replied. – You know, I only want you to know… if whenever you would feel you did not wish to be with Erik any more… or if you… felt unsafe with him… I wish you to know you are not alone and helpless in Paris. There will always be people to help you. The Daroga is one of them, and whenever you need a doctor but you don't feel comfortable discussing your problem with Erik… he is my doctor for more than 20 years, and is a very good and conscientious doctor. You see Erik is not the type of person who runs to the doctor with every cases of a cold, but if he has some serious illness he cannot cure himself out of, he will see this doctor. He saved him from death and many dangerous illnesses before… so he will cure you as well, no matter what.

- Oh so you have a doctor as well.

- Yes.

- At least I do know now who to alert if you happen to be sick.

- Oh do not bother with that, please. – He shook his head. – I visit him by myself if I feel the need of it.

- Erik, may I ask then… something?

- Yes, Erik shall answer.

- Why did you not take me to him when you found me in the cellars then?

Silence. Erik shuddered just like a chill ran down his spine suddenly, and remained silent for a good two minutes. Finally he responded though.

- For more reasons. I did not wish anyone to know about your existence back then as it would have only caused me trouble. Secondly, I thought myself as a good enough doctor to take care of you alone, without the help of anyone else. I have to admit, at first nursing you back to health wasn't at all about you. It was about me. After Christine left, I wanted to die, you know before I died I wished to prove myself I was capable of doing something good, but I did not really care about you. I was experimenting, and emotions weren't taking a role in the play back then. In my youth I have studied human anatomy and curing only for making people suffer and to know how to kill. You were among the very few examples I wished to help.

- I see. – I nodded. His words hurt me in a way, yet I felt it back then as well that he did not help me out of love, for sure. And at least he was finally honest.

- If you despise me for this confession you have every right to do so.

- I don't despise someone finally being honest with me. – I smiled.

- Oh. Then…?

- I thank you for telling the truth. And also, I would like to assure you I won't be angry if you tell me the truth. You may tell me anything.

- So you will be a second conscience to Erik…?

- If you need one, I am right here.

- Oh… thank you… it is more than I could ask for. And… that you still are here with me… despite everything… is just a bigger gift, a much bigger one than I do deserve. But I shall show you I am worthy of your love and kindness. – He kissed my hand, gently and looked into my eyes with endless adoration.

- Erik, dear, speaking of gifts… - I wished to change the subject to a lighter note. – As you don't seem to like surprises, I would like to ask you to tell me what to buy for your Birthday.

- Buy? Do you happen to own money? – He laughed out, knowing I usually did not have money.

- I found five francs on the street! – I spat it out proudly. - And I have 4 francs 45 centimes from a shopping you said I could keep the change.

- Aha! Well, I'd suggest you to spend it on something you want then.

- But What about your Birthday?

- Oh we have plenty of time to figure it out yet. – He chuckled.

- Not really. Your Birthday is in 5 or 6 days from today. Depends when you would like to have it. On 28th or 1st March?

- And which of those dates are Erik's actual Birthday, my dear, hm?

- Actually none of them, but…

- Exactly. As you know, my sweet little girl, our planet goes around the Sun and it circles it in a time period which we call one year. That equals in 365 days and 6 hours in total. Once in every four years, to fix the error with the extra 6 hours, which, in a four years time creates an extra day, we get a twenty- ninth of February, on which day, among others, Erik had the misfortune to come to this world. Which date, because of its rarity, isn't happening this year. You exactly have two years and six days from today to decide about my so called Birthday celebration.

- Erik you have a Birthday in every year. You age.

- Sadly. But we are not celebrating a nonexistant day. Blame the Sun or the calendar or whatever you wish to blame for it.

- Erik, it is a round anniversary, which are to be held.

- Who said that?

- Usually people celebrate 5 and 10 year Birthdays even if they don't celebrate in every year. You are turning 50.

- Thank you for reminding Erik of his age, especially the age compared to yours. This sure adds to the urge of celebration.

- Oh come on… do you not want to have Birthday finally? I bet no one celebrated it normally for you.

- And what shall I celebrate on that day, huh? – He snapped, but he did not want to make a scene on the street.

- The day of your birth, of course. – I stated matter- of factly.

- Remembering the day I was born is nothing I should think of with happiness, you see. What should I be happy for? Killing my father? Having my mother deliver both a stillborn totally healthy twin and me, the monster? Turning older by another year? Getting a year closer to death…? Oh which would sound nice, actually…

- What are you saying…? – I gasped. No I wasn't shocked about his usual sarcasm and wish to die, but his sentence about him killing his father was just unbelievable.

- Erik most likely killed his father. His heart could not bear the sight. – He shrugged. – And mother informed me I had a twin sister. She was very beautiful and very dead. Erik was thought to be dead as well, as he did not cry out. Mother, when she saw Erik's face… had accidentally kicked him off of the bed by the reflex of shock. Hitting the ground made him cry finally, giving a proof of his miserable existence to Mother and the rest of the world. Mother had to arrange two funerals at the day of my birth, and a baptismal. She hoped I was going to follow my dead relatives soon, and did not wish me to leave the world without the first sacrament. Yet she blamed me she could not give this thing to… Suzanne in her life.

- Oh Erik… I did not know…

- Now you do. – He nodded slowly.

- But… sorry for still fussing about it, but… as you linked so many negative feelings and thoughts with your Birthday… would it not be the time finally to link some positive thoughts with it by celebrating it like everyone else? – I offered hesitantly.

- I did not yet examine the matter from this point of view, for sure. You have a reason to say so, I have to admit. – He scratched his wig behind his ear absently.

- Besides, you celebrated my Birthday which makes no sense then if we don't celebrate yours.

- Your Birthday can be and will be celebrated in every year. I was happy I was finally able to celebrate it for someone I love. – He stated. – But… well… you are… you can be right. And as I know you, it would make you feel bad if you could not have a Birthday celebration for Erik. Am I right?

- Yes you are. – I smiled.

- Well, then I will have a suggestion. Buy me nothing. I don't wish to receive any material gifts, I have never received them, and I have everything I need. But… Erik asks you to spend a day similar with him as I did with your Birthday. That means you grant Erik's wishes.

- Oh deal. – I nodded with a grin.

- You don't have to be afraid. – Erik stated cautiously. – Erik shall not ask anything… indecent. And you can say no anytime…

- Erik, I am sure you can't ask a thing I could refuse. Unless if it is something illegal.

- Oh, they aren't. I am not… forcing you to get in trouble.

- Then I am sure I grant every wishes of yours. – I hugged his upper arm which made him sigh with relief and delight.

We walked home in a noticeably better mood. It was a longer walk, and we could have gotten a carriage to take us home- but it was so great to walk with him in this nice weather, finally both of us getting relaxed. I was excited for his Birthday coming in my mind, and was curious about his requests for that day.