Maybe Tomorrow - Stereophonics
Shepard was lying on her back, gazing at the stars passing by at faster-than-light speed above her as Garrus slept restlessly beside her. He was muttering and constantly rolling around, making her wonder if he was being haunted by similar nightmares to her own.
No rest was allowed for her. They were en route to the Citadel to drop off the vast majority of her squad before she headed to face Earth and the Alliance.
She rolled onto her side to face Garrus. Although it had only been a week since their attack on the Collector base, each day with her turian had been marvelous. They would spend time with their crew - and friends - with whom they had developed an unbreakable bond after the suicide mission. They would lie in bed together for hours, learning more about each other and their bodies. He learned about her hair, her fingers, and her skin; she learned about his cowl, his spurs, and his mandibles. Although they weren't born of the same species, they fit together like they were built for each other; she was the misfit Torx screw who had been waiting for him, the Torx screwdriver, her whole life. Uncertainty clouded her future, but of one thing she was absolutely certain: although the forces that be wanted them apart, she would do everything in her power to bring them back together again.
Impatience took over and she rose surreptitiously from the bed, rubbing her eyes and running her fingers through her unusually clean hair from a week long absence of combat. Garrus had become fascinated by her hair and the millions of individual strands: they had even spent an evening where she taught him how she washed it, brushed it, braided it, and pulled it into a bun. He loved every moment.
She wasn't surprised when her feet carried her first to her closet, then to the fridge in the mess, then down to the cargo bay. She perched on a crate and ate what may have once been ginger chicken and white race, but had now become something closer to a mushy paste.
As she ate, her eyes never left the three long, rectangular crates beside her. Two were destined for Earth with her: the first held the body of Jack, the second only held the possessions of Jacob. Although they were unable to recover Jacob's body, she needed to be sure he was honoured properly. The third was destined for the Citadel.
In spite of the fact that Tali had begged Shepard to allow her to take Legion's body back to the flotilla ("The technology will be invaluable for the quarians!"), Shepard flat out refused to dishonour her friend's body by declining to send him to his people. It had taken her days of work, but she managed to get in contact with a geth stationed alone in the Horsehead Nebula. She was having Legion shipped to him from the Citadel so the geth could arrange to have him returned to his people on Rannoch.
Leaving her plate on the crate, she stood and approached the treadmill, craving a release for the excess energy building up within her.
While her mind exited the present to travel through the past, her feet carried her for miles without leaving the ship.
Garrus awoke suddenly, feeling disappointed at the realization that he was alone not only in the bed, but also in the quarters. He dressed quickly and made his way down to the mess, knowing that there was a good chance Zoey was either there or in the cargo bay.
When the mess proved to only have Miranda and Samara in it, Miranda listening attentively to a tale of Samara apprehending a rogue salarian STG operative, he quickly grabbed a dextro nutrient bar and made his way back to the elevator.
"Garrus," Thane muttered as the turian stepped into place beside him.
"Thane. Looking forward to finally spending some time away from this ship?"
The drell's gaze turned away. "Not exactly. I'm becoming fond of the friends that have been developed here. But alas, life must continuously guide us to new places."
"Sometimes we like the familiar more than the new."
"The Normandy was new once too, to all of us."
Silence filled the small elevator. "Are you going to travel with Kasumi?"
"If she wants. But I wish to spend some time with my son, and she is a free spirit and may choose her own path." He ran his hand over his chin. "It is unfortunate that you do not have an option."
Garrus's blue eyes rose to the ceiling. "It's time for me to go home."
The elevator doors opened, and Thane stepped out in engineering. He called over his shoulder before the doors closed, "This isn't home?"
I suppose it is.
When the elevator reached the level of the cargo bay, Garrus exited and his eyes immediately rested on the jogging form of Zoey Shepard. In an exposed moment, he found that she was moving her lips as if speaking silently.
He approached the treadmill and leaned on a crate just out of her direct vision. "Practicing your speeches?"
She held up her forefinger while slowing to a walk before pulling her small headphones out of her ears. "What?"
"You were moving your lips without speaking. So I asked if you were practicing your speeches."
"Lip synching." She took a sip of her water. "It's probably very silly to you, but it's like silently singing. Same benefits of belting out your favourite tune without the embarrassment."
He nodded solemnly. "So, today's the day."
"Don't remind me," she muttered under her breath. "Leaving my ship and my crew to face a trial before imbeciles? Not my idea of a fun time." She further slowed her pace and wiped her face with a towel. "I... I'm happy that you get to go back to Palaven. You can be with your family again."
His posture slouched. "I'm happy to see my mother and sister. My dad and I... we'll need a bit of work, but I'm hoping that the imminent threat of doom will speed up the pace on that a bit."
"If only the threat of doom could get things moving on my end." She laughed mirthlessly.
Garrus swallowed. "If there's anything I can do... anything at all..."
Her walking stopped and she stepped off the machine so she could stand before him. Affectionately, she wrapped her hands around his cowl and pulled him in for a kiss. "It's time for both of us to do our duties. You're an angel, Garrus, and you've done more for me than I could ever ask for. Just promise me that you'll take care of yourself."
"I will." They kissed again. "I have something for you. Mind coming upstairs with me?"
"Only if we're staying there until we dock."
"I want you to hear me out before I give this to you."
Shepard leaned back on the bed, her legs crossed with her foot on top bouncing eagerly. "Go on, Vakarian, do you really want to keep your CO waiting?"
"You have one of the best shots with a pistol that I've ever seen. It's clear you have the natural eye for a great shot, but I feel like it's wasted on guns that are too small. You need something big, something with a backbone. Something like this."
He pulled his Mantis out of the holster on his back and laid it tenderly on her lap. She gazed at it, her brow furrowed.
"I don't know how long you'll be on Earth," he continued, "but hopefully they'll give you some time on the shooting range. A sniper seems daunting at first, but I know that with your strength and your shot you'll be a natural. Also, I've modified it to increase your accuracy and to increase your perception when you first look down the scope so it'll make it a bit easier to get started."
She surprised him by throwing her head back and laughing loudly. "Well, I guess its good I got you this then." She reached into her footlocker and pulled out a Viper rifle, placing it into his empty talons. "I thought it was time for an upgrade for you." He joined her laughing and holstered it before pulling her in for a tight hug.
"Thank you," he whispered into her ear, planting kisses along the side of her face. "Thank you."
Shepard tentatively knocked on the door to Miranda's office.
"Come in, Commander."
She took in a deep breath of apprehension before stepping into her XO's familiar office. It was clear that Miranda had been packing; the room was now bare, leaving only a few boxes of unnecessary objects near the door and a duffel bag filled with her prized possessions was perched on her desk. Miranda rounded the corner with the last box in her arms and dropped it beside the others before brushing her hands off.
"That's everything then," Miranda said with a long sigh. "Those boxes are all the things I won't need any more, so you can distribute everything around the ship. I'm sure Garrus will be interested in the tech." She nervously picked at a split end while gazing longingly at the majority of her possessions. "Running away from Cerberus means really downsizing."
"Listen Miranda, I wanted to apologize-"
"No, Shepard, I'm the one who owes you an apology. That was a really tough call you had to make and it was wrong of me to antagonize you over it."
"I wonder to myself, over and over again, if I had listened to you if it would have saved their lives."
"We both watched those innocent people get melted into a paste. That would have been our crew if we hadn't acted. I know that Jack, Jacob, and Legion would have been proud to give their lives to save others." She looked uncomfortable, like there was something she wanted to say but she hadn't yet mustered up the courage.
"Something on your mind?" Zoey prompted.
In a voice barely above a whisper she responded, "Just words that were left unsaid."
They lapsed into silence, Miranda clearly not wanting to elaborate further. She finally broke the tension and said, "Thank you for being such a good friend, Shepard. It means a lot to me." Zoey pulled her in for a hug and said, "Keep in touch when you can."
Zoey made her exit, pondering whether the words left unsaid were meant for Jack or Jacob.
Their time had come and gone, their departing words had been exchanged, and they stood in silence on the docks with their foreheads touching and their eyes closed.
Although they had both insisted that they were doing what they had to, they knew that they would find each other as soon as they could. For Shepard, the knowledge that such an important goal was lying before her would be enough to get her through many hard nights during incarceration.
Garrus's stomach was tied into knots. Here he was, with the woman of his dreams, having to part because of more political bullshit. How poetic.
Knowing that if he didn't leave soon he would never have the will, he held the sides of her face and pulled her in for a long kiss before they whispered 'goodbye' in each others' ears. Their hands lingering together briefly, he turned to make his way through the docking bay with the Normandy still in his peripheral vision.
Did he love Zoey Shepard? The aching in his heart at their departure told him that he did. But their time together had been so short that now was not the time to know. But the time for falling deeply in love and creating a life together was still before them.
They just had to get through one small obstacle: the Reapers.
Emotionally exhausted from bidding goodbye to all her non-human crew members (as well as Kasumi, who insisted that she had an employer on the Citadel although everyone knew that it was really Thane), Shepard slinked down into the cargo bay with a copy of George Orwell's Animal Farm tucked under her arm. An unusual plan had struck her involving the dystopian classic.
She pulled a chair up next to the two remaining coffins with a water bottle at her feet and began to dictate the novel to her fallen human crew members. It was cathartic for her: it was the last time she would spend with the two people, and it seemed to be an appropriate way to spend it.
The Collector Base had changed her, she was heavily aware of it. Perhaps it was watching Legion fall defenselessly after opening the door for everyone else, or perhaps it was watching Jacob's lifeless form fly into the abyss. The memories haunted her every moment, both waking and sleeping, and she was painfully reminded of the difficulties of maintaining a position of command.
Life can as quickly take away as it can give. She would have to use her pain to grow and learn as a commander, so she could come out stronger on the next side.
And as the pigs stood at the dinner table, the Normandy docked at Vancouver.
A/N: Wow, we've finished part one!
There aren't enough thank yous in the world for my readers. It's a roller coaster going from a little idea in the farthest corner of your mind to fleshing everything out on paper, and I wouldn't be able to do it without your support.
But our journey together is not yet over: part two will be started on Monday, carrying us through the events of Mass Effect 3 in my little world. Prepare for a lot of laughs and a lot of tears. I will be keeping it in this same story, however there is a clear divide between parts one and two.
If any of my readers have any questions, please review and I will be more than happy to answer them. You are the fuel to my fire.
I would also like to throw another thank you out to Bioware, without their wonderful series I would never have the opportunity to have this story absorb my mind.
I'll see everyone on Monday!