A/N So...yea....I am so sorry about the ridiculously long wait for the update...but as most of you may know it's the winding down of the semester so things are kind of hectic plus i have like Swan flu or something to boot. Swan Flu...not Swine...its not as bad but it still sucks. Lol...anyways...i hope you enjoy this...its a filler chapter that sets things up for the next one....i tried to add some humor....and some depth to one of the characters for later use...okay I'm rambling...go read...enjoy....

Medicate

BPoV

I snuck out of Jacobs's house quietly and prayed that he wouldn't hear my monster of a car start. The night before had been too weird, too much for me to take in all at once and I needed to just get home and think.

Jacob obviously had feelings for me. He had kissed me. And I didn't know what to do about it.

I stared straight ahead, pushing my engine has hard as it would go when Sam stepped out into the street. My breath hitched in my lungs and I swerved out of the way stopping just before my truck hit a tree. Sam ran over and yanked the door open pulling me out of the truck. I screamed but he clamped his hand over my mouth pushing me against the truck.

"Stop screaming. Do you want to wake up the whole neighborhood?" he asked with a wild look on his face.

"What do you want Sam?" I asked when he let me go.

"You know what I want."

"No I really don't. I really don't know what you are expecting me to tell you."

"About those filthy bloodsuckers you love so much in case they come back. It was different before…when they weren't attacking people. Now that they are we need to know what they can do."

"Sam…He didn't attack me. None of them have ever attacked me. I already told you this."

"Then who did they kill?"

"What do you mean?"

"We know that they killed one of their kind. We know that one of them came onto the Rez. Now tell me what the hell was going on!"

I stared into Sam's face for a moment. I could the anger coming off of him in waves. He crossed his arms and tapped his foot impatiently, waiting for me to respond but I didn't know what to tell secrets weren't mine to tell and no matter what...I would never betray them.

"Sam it doesn't matter anymore. Trust me. They aren't coming back. I haven't heard from any of them since they left." I turned and climbed back into my truck and reached for the door but Sam stepped in the way.

"You're keeping vital information from the people that are trying to protect you and that's stupid. Fuck Bella, you're like the feces that are produced when shame eats too much stupidity. Can't you think of anyone but yourself? There are people other than you that live around here that are in danger because of them. You know what they can do. Now tell me…or so help me God I'll beat it out of you. I have no problem with sacrificing one to save many."

He stepped closer to me and I could see the fire in his eye. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't move. I thought he would drag me out into the street right there and execute his threat but he didn't. He just stared back at me waiting. Waiting as I choked back my tears and tried to pretend that I wasn't frightened for my life.

"Sam, please believe me," I pleaded with him. "I stayed with the Cullens for a month. They wouldn't hurt anyone. Yes they are strong. Unbelievably strong but they are also gone. Unbelievably gone. Now thank you so fucking much for ripping open all the wounds I spent the last four months trying to close. If you don't mind I'm going to go home." I didn't give him the opportunity to respond. I started my car and drove away with the door swinging open. I drove all the way home shaking. I was angry and frightened. Sam scared the crap out of me.

So many questions were running through my mind. How had they known about what happened with James in the woods? Why on earth did they think they could fight them? I knew the only way I would be able to get answers would be to talk to Jacob but I was ready yet. I spent the rest of the day cleaning and trying to finish up my vacation homework. At dinner Charlie questioned me about the Pow Wow. I considered telling him what happened with Sam but it dawned on me that I couldn't. I had no explanation for his hostility and I wouldn't put it past Charlie to go down to Sam's house and stick his gun in his face to find out. By the time I went to bed I was tried and aggravated. I decided to try the remedy from the night before and snuck down to Charlie's liquor cabinet. I watched TV drowning myself in vodka and cranberry juice until I couldn't see straight then dragged me drunk ass to bed.

The next day I woke to a loud banging noise. I had the hangover from hell and it sounded as if a swat team was trying to get into my house. I rolled out of bed covering me ears-which didn't help- and ran down the stairs.

"Bella?" Jacob yelled walking into my kitchen. He whipped around when I stepped on the bottom stair and it squeaked. "Oh, there you are. You're front doors unlocked. Do you have any idea how unsafe that is? Anyone can just walk in here." As he said this Sam came strolling up behind him glaring at me.

"Yea I see that. What… What are you doing here Jacob?"

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay. You haven't returned any of my calls." Jacobs's eyes unlike Sam's, were soft. His face was so much the Jacob that I was used to that I found myself oddly at ease even though Sam looked like he wanted to jump over Jacob's shoulder and rip my head off.

"I'm fine Jacob." He glanced over his shoulder nodding towards the door and Sam slowly backed out the kitchen.

"Sam has something that he wants to ask you. I told him it would be better just call but you weren't answering you phone so… "

I held my hand up silencing him. "Is that why you came here Jacob? If it is then save it, because I don't know how else to express to you that I have nothing to tell you."

"That's why Sam came but not me. I came just to….to see you." I felt the rush of blood to my face and at the same time saliva rushed into my mouth. I made it to the kitchen sink just in time before pink Lo Mien noodles came flying out of my mouth.

"Ewwww Bella's that's disgusting!" Jacob said laughing from behind me holding my hair back.

"Sorry Jake…I…."

"Had too much to drink last night from the looks of it." He came closer and sniffed me. "And from the smell of it," he said laughingly as a pushed him away. He pulled a glass out of the cabinet from above our heads and filled it with water. I drank it slowly watching Sam rifling around my living room from the corner of my eye. Jacob was still talking though for the life of me I couldn't repeat what he said. I couldn't take my eyes off of Sam. What on earth could he be looking for in my damn living room?

Then I realized what he was doing….he wasn't looking with his eyes…he was looking with his…his nose.

"Hello, Bella…..I'm talking to you!" My attention snapped to Jacob who was clapping his hand in my face. "Did you hear anything I said at all?"

"Um….yes….no….Jake look I don't feel well obviously," I motioned to the sink, "Do you think we could do this later. Besides I don't really want to talk about any of this with Sam in the house. I'll call you when I'm ready to talk." I pushed him towards the front door and Sam came in line behind me. In an instant a sense of terror washed over me I froze for a moment before sliding from between them held the door open.

"Bella I…."

"I'll call you Jacob. I promise. Soon. Bye." I said slowly shutting the door in his face.

Sam was sniffing my furniture like a….like a dog. What the hell?

Needless to say I didn't call Jacob over the next few days. A few times I caught Sam driving past my house, staring menacingly as he passed, which only added to my stress. I didn't want to deal with Deputy Dawg, but that kept Jacob away as well. I noticed that since he kissed me…since I met Sam and the rest of their "pack" he didn't come around. I didn't think I would miss his presence but I did.

Wednesday morning came and it was time to go back to school. Both the alarm clock I had gotten for Christmas and Charlie were screaming for me to get up.

"I'm up Dad! Stop yelling!" I screamed down the stairs on my way to the bathroom.

My eyes were bloodshot and my face was all splotchy. I showered and dressed decent enough for civilization but it didn't help how I felt. I felt like another piece of me was missing and I didn't want to admit that it might have something to do with Jacob.

"Geez Bella, do you have to flu or something. You look terrible. Didn't you sleep last night?"

"I'm fine Dad, God, you sure do know how to make a girl feel pretty."

"Well Bella, these past two weeks I haven't seen you in anything but sweat pants."

"Why get dressed when I'm just sitting in the house?"

"Why sit in the house? Why don't you give Jacob a call?"

"What's it to you?"

"Watch it young lady! He came here almost every day to sit with you while you were being zombie girl. So don't act like he isn't a good friend."

"You're right Dad. I'm sorry. I just don't like his friends, that's all." I got up from the table picking up my bag and headed for the front door. "I'll call Jacob when I get home from school today. I promise."

Maybe.

The first day back to school was just like any other day, except that I had the strange feeling that everyone was watching me. For some reason I felt like everyone knew my big secret and they were all talking behind my back. In math I caught Lauren and Jessica staring at me and whispering. I tried to follow her gaze, and I'm sure it was just my imagination but it seemed like they were staring at the bite mark that Tanya had left with she bit me or my hair...one of the two. By the end of the day my nerves were shot, and I finally had to admit to myself that the silent comfort I had grown accustomed to would not be there.

I jogged across the lot towards my and almost slipped on ice when I saw Sam I leaning on his truck, parked a few spaces away from me.

I screamed when he started to come towards me. "Bella, you're gonna answers my questions now!" Even from a distance I could see his eyes were bulging out of his head!

"No Sam!" I yelled holding my hands up. I was hoping it would catch someone's attention but no one even looked my way.

Had I become that invisible?

"Bella!"

"You've been stalking me, terrorizing me for two weeks. Leave me alone!" I jumped into my car turning the key in the ignition. It started with a roar and when the noise quieted I heard Sam saying something about "red hair" before I drove away. I could here my tires squealing as I sped out of the parking lot.

I drove fast looking for a place to pull over so I could calm down. I ended up pulling over in the wood half way between my school and home. I pulled the flask out from my book bag and climbed out of my truck into the bed of it. The cold air felt good against my face as I let the Captain Morgan and ginger ale warm me from the inside out.

Before I knew it I was feeling rightly drunk and knew that I should get home before one of Charlie's deputies found me making snow angels by the side of the road. I chuckled to myself climbing out of the bed of the truck. I stumbled, almost falling and then missed the handle completely when I reached for it.

"Ha ha….I'm drunk." I laughed out loud, reaching for and missing the handle again.

"Okay Swan…getting it together. Lets just get home and we can sleep this off by the time Charlie comes in with his whipping stick." I concentrated intently on grabbing the handle and pulled the door open.

"Bella what the hell do you think you are doing?"

My body went cold and rigid as that beautiful and familiar voice rang loud in my ears. I stoop up slowly searching for him as my breath came out in short gasps…but there was no one. There was nothing. There was no sound but the wind.

"Maybe I really am crazy," I thought to myself and started to hoist myself into the truck. The wind blew soft and cold against my face. It felt like his touch. I shook my head trying to shake away the thought it, climbed into my truck, and started the car.

"Bella stop! You're drunk."

"No shit Sherlock." I put the gear into drive and just as I was about to ease my foot off the break I heard his voice again, this time a whisper in my ear raising the hair on the back of my neck.

"Bella don't. You could get into an accident. You could kill someone or worse yourself."

"Shut up!!!!!" I screamed back at well…myself. The low rumbling of my engine took on a new sound in my ears. It sounded like his growl. I threw the car pack into park and ripped the keys out of the ignition throwing the on the floor. I knew he…the voice….whatever it was…was right. I was in no shape to drive. I pulled out my cell and dialed the number of the only person I knew would answer and come no questions asked.

"Bella, I'm so glad you called. Where are you?"

"In the woods near my school. Jake I'm gonna be honest with you. I'm drunk and I really need you to come get me."

"Um sure Bella…ill be right there. Just sit tight okay." The line went silent and while I waited I ended up drifting off to sleep. I heard when the door opened and peered with one eye at Jake climbing in giving me that ear to ear smile he always gives.

"You could have waited with the heat on you know. Don't you know that's how hobo's freeze to death?" His infectious laughter filled the car and I find myself smiling. When Sam wasn't around Jacob was like a breath of fresh air.

"Thanks for coming Jacob. I didn't realize I was so drunk until…I started hearing things."

"Hearing things?"

"Never mind…you'll think I'm crazy."

"I already think you're crazy, Loca. But not just for drinking in the middle of the day." He raised his eyebrow knowingly at me but the smile on his face just made me want to laugh and I did.

"Sam came to my school today Jacob. Seriously he's freaking me out. He's been like stalking me or something."

"I know." He kept his eyes on the road as he drove but I could see that it didn't bother him one bit.

"He threatened me that morning I left your house. I'm afraid of him."

"Don't be."

"He looked serious Jacob, How could I not be."

"He was serious, but you don't have to be afraid of him. I wouldn't let him hurt you. He thinks you know something about the vampire that passed through here a few days ago. It was an unfamiliar sent…didn't smell like the Cullens and well Sam thought you might know something. Do you?."

"No…I don't. The Cullens told me sometimes they had others that came through to visit them…maybe she's looking for them. Or maybe she's a nomad. How the hell should I know?"

"Well I told him you wouldn't but I've been wrong before." He narrowed his eyes at me and for a second his face was grave when he looked at me before his bright smile took over his face again.

" You know just because I dated a vampire that doesn't make me an expert."

"Okay God. Calm down…you're an angry drunk I see. "

"Shush Jacob" I said punching him in the arm as we pulled into Fork's only diner's parking lot. Jacob got out of the car and got halfway through the lot before realizing I wasn't with him. It's not like I expected him to come and open the door for me…but still…wasn't that like chivalry 101? He stood there waiting for me so I climbed out BY DRUNKEN SELF and we walked into the diner.

"So you don't know anything about Red?" Jacob asked after we place our orders.

"Red?"

"The vamp chick that's been running around here. She was around for a few days, we managed to keep her from feeding off anyone in town."

"And just how pray tell?"

"The how doesn't really matter. Just know that we're stronger than those stupid blood suckers you were running around with."

"Jake…you can't really run with vampires….because…you know…they're fast."

"Ha ha Bella. "

The food came and we and talked like old times. We talked a little about my inability to sleep and the nightmares leading to a lecture about my drinking. I made a promise that I would stop drinking alone. It wasn't really hard to give up now that it was making me delusional, but I didn't tell him that. Now that I was awake…I realized when Jake wasn't being Captain Questionmuch I actually liked being around him. At some point during the meal his hand reached across the table to hold mine. It felt…good. He radiated warmth and friendliness.

Sam ended up calling him, cutting our visit short and as I drive home I had to listen to Jacob convince him that I didn't know anything about the vampire girl.

"So. No more drinking right. If you feel like you cant sleep and need to talk…just call me Bella. I'm always here for you…you know that right.?"

I nodded and he sighed, leaning in to kiss me. I turned my head quickly so his kiss landed on my cheek. I felt him laugh against me and the feel of his warm breath sent chills from down my spine to right between my legs where I honestly hadn't felt anything in months.

"See you later Bells."

Jacob up and I both got out of my truck and I watched him jog up the street before turning towards the front door.

Since I already ate I whipped up dinner for Charlie and went up to my room. My thoughts started to circle and I as showered I came to the realization that, although I knew I would never be happy again…that didn't mean I couldn't be okay. Being around Jacob made it seem like the sun was shining for me again.

I would take Jacob up on his offer to come out of my shell as long as I didn't have to be around Sam if for no other reason then well…Jacob had always been my friend….nothing had changed that. As I crawled into bed I felt better but no sooner than I fell asleep the sound of wolves howling shocked me awake. At first I was dreaming but after picking myself up off the floor I knew that I wasn't. The howling didn't sound like a normal wolf's howl. It was louder…deeper…and sounded way to close to my house.

I crept down the stairs quietly, being careful not to wake Charlie and went to the back door. Looking out into the darkness I saw nothing but the howling didn't stop. Something drove me to open the door and step out side into the cold January air. I stepped into the back yard peering deeper into the woods when I saw a flash of red fly through the trees.

I was sure it wasn't what I thought it was….but after all I had seen how I could ever be sure of anything ever again. I turned walking back into the house, closing and locking the door behind me. As if it would make a difference I checked all the locks on the windows and drew all the curtains on the first floor and then the second before crawling into bed. After a few hours of tossing and turning I finally fell asleep and before I knew it, it was morning.

A/N As a said a filler...on top of that it's proably a bunch of crap i know...but some of the details were important for future things...and i know it was a little long but im cramming as much into each chapter as possible....

Um...the next chapter is really important...I already have most of it planned out..im just getting my playlist together so hopefully i can get it done on top of all my work but if it takes a few days don't hate me...i have a state test and a college placement test coming up plus I'm moving...

As always I ask that you review...Even if its just to tell me what you thought of New Moon....I really liked it....just not the placement of the soundtrack...I only liked where they put like 3 of the songs...the rest just seemed to thrown in there....