A/N Hiiii! With school being a pain in the ass and exams just around the corner (plus all the hoework, yes that typo was intentional) it's a miracle I even had time to write this, haha. High school's a right bitch. So anyway, this is a bit different from the usual I write for this collection, but it was a request, and I found it funny. XD

Title: Dad's Secret

Rating: T

Warnings: swearing, revealing pictures haha

Requested by: No.1DigiBakuFan (I changed it around a bit, but don't I always! *grin*)

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Trisha sighed, slumping against the wall of her bedroom. She was bored.

Ever since this morning at nine when she woke up, she'd been cooped up in here playing with her dolls. While she usually loved doing that, today she was in one of those moods.

Trisha Mustang was fourteen, and at fourteen she was sure she wasn't supposed to play with dolls anymore. Nowadays she only played with Nina, her little sister, and she actually enjoyed it. However, she was way too embarrassed to admit to her friends she play with dolls.

At her age she should be doing something more grown-up, yet her mum and dad thought she should do whatever made her feel happy, not what everyone her age was doing.

She emitted another sigh, her blonde hair falling in her face as she crossed her arms.

Sometimes she thought her mum and dad were way too innocent for their age. She knew that wasn't the case, of course, since Dad had an obnoxious habit of telling the story of how Mum was the famous Fullmetal Alchemist until her ears bled and Mum threw something at him to shut him up, but they just didn't understand her.

Girls her age wanted to dress nicely and start using make up, and she had been told thousands of times that she was wasting her looks by not taking advantage of them.

Trisha had been blessed with her mum's fast metabolism, so while she didn't have much bust yet (Mum had reassured her that she had been the same), she had the skinny legs and the flat stomach teenage girls dreamed of.

Tina, her best friend, had told her once how easy it would be for her to attract the cute guys if she tried a little. She'd said her golden eyes would cast a spell on them.

She had opened up to Mum about it, but had come to the quick realisation that Mum didn't get it. She never wore make up and for some reason always dressed in boy-ish clothes (Dad's most of the time). Mum and makeup were not to be mixed; the only thing you could truly talk about with her was alchemy. But Trisha didn't want to talk about alchemy.

Upon expressing her feelings about the male species, Mum had, quite boldly, told her she'd find someone who loved her for how annoying she was, not her face.

Mum didn't get it.

Dad had said something along those lines as well, but after a few minutes started telling her how when she was born she had a darker shade of hair and he and Mum thought she'd look like her grandmother, Trisha Elric, hence her name, but she proved them wrong afterwards, and Trisha just up and left. Dad tended to do that, he went off on a tangent.

It was after those conversations that she realised that Mum and Dad were too innocent in the relationship part of life. They had probably gotten married and had kids, and that was that. It kind of disappointed her, really, that they wouldn't explore their relationship more. She would definitely do so in the future. She wasn't going to be like Mum, probably losing her virginity after marriage – who did that nowadays? Her parents were so old-style.

Standing up from her slumped position against the wall, she stretched, wincing, before deciding to head downstairs. She supposed she had to find something else to entertain her, since dolls were not her thing anymore.

As she walked down the stairs, Mum caught a glimpse of her and smiled.

"You hungry?" she asked, her hands drying a plate with a towel.

She and Dad always argued about the dishes, so they'd come to an agreement that they'd take turns.

Trisha rubbed her stomach and shrugged. "Not really, I'm just bored."

Her mum hummed, her eyes narrowing as she thought. After a few seconds she grunted, waving. "Go find your father."

Trisha shook her head, her feet automatically taking her to Dad's study. She knocked, opening the door when there was no response.

There was no one in.

She frowned, wondering where Dad was. Now that she thought about it, he was probably still sleeping. Last night he had been called late at night to work; he and Mum hadn't told her why, but she had eavesdropped and heard something about a crime scene. Well, her dad was in the military.

Curiosity made her bite her lip. For some reason they weren't allowed alone in Dad's office. Yet here she was, standing alone in the middle of the room, the door closed behind her.

Her wide eyes swept the room, going over the large bookshelves of alchemy books Mum called her babies, and resting on the large desk. Dad often sat there, doing paperwork he hadn't managed to finish at work. He always had a scowl on his face.

Trisha walked over to the mahogany desk, cautiously touching it as though it would bite.

Dad had some paperwork sprawled all over it but, even if she tried, she couldn't understand what it said, neither could she discern Dad's quick handwriting.

Quickly getting bored, her eyes rested on the several draws by her feet. She had never looked in there and, as far as she knew, Dad didn't use them much either.

Curiosity got the best of her and she popped one open. Military files and dossiers which, upon further inspection, were also full of military files. She went through all of them, but what made her burn with curiosity was the last one, which was empty save for a white envelope. There was no military stamp on it, nor was there any writing to indicate what it was.

Doubt settled in her chest. What if this was somehow connected to the crime scene Dad had gotten up at two in the morning for? What if there were gruesome images in there? She never wanted to see those.

The expression 'curiosity killed the cat' ran through her mind as she opened it, the pictures flowing out onto the desk.

It was not what she expected.

Mum's golden eyes stared back at her in all of the pictures, but the way they were staring made her feel like prey. Her eyes were narrowed, the golden darker than what it usually was. Trisha's eyes went downwards, and her face became hot.

That was the most womanly outfit she had ever seen her mum in.

The black dress hugged her skinny figure perfectly, the red high heels being something different for Trisha. Mum never wore high heels. The garment was short, way too short – honestly, it was something like what her friends wore to the school dances. She looked really young in that picture.

Mum was wearing the same dress in every picture, but as she flipped through the images, Trisha could've sworn her position became more provocative.

Her face on fire, it only just dawned on her that this woman was her supposedly innocent mum.

"What the hell!?" she screeched, throwing the pictures on the desk.

Mum wasn't supposed to dress like that, she wasn't supposed to look so – so slutty.

And why the hell did Dad have those in his draw!?

The door banged open, Maes and Nina stumbling in.

Maes was her twin, so he wasn't too young, but the sight of Nina coming closer made her big sister instincts kick in. There was no way she would allow her little sister's innocence to be destroyed.

Almost subconsciously, her body flew on the desk to cover the pictures, just as Maes and Nina came up to her, their eyes wide.

"What the hell, Trisha!" Maes yelled, his golden eyes wide and panicked.

Nina looked ready to burst into tears, her dark blue eyes tearing up and her chubby hands holding her teddy bear tightly. "Wha's wrong, big sister?"

Before Trisha could respond, Maes' eyes rested on the desk, and they widened considerably. Trisha blanched when she saw a photo of Mum sitting on this very desk, her legs spread and her hand 'shyly' pulling down the dress. She was biting her lip and all.

Trisha's eyes burned and she looked away, her arm awkwardly moving to cover that one as well.

"Get Nina out of here," she croaked, her chest being flat on the desk and hindering her breathing. Maes understood, nodding. Gently grabbing Nina's hand, he flashed his big brother smile.

As soon as they were out Trisha gathered the pictures and stuffed them in the envelope, slumping down on the floor. She only had a moment to calm her heart, however, because the door flew open again, banging against the wall, and she jumped a mile.

Her mum and dad stared around wildly, and Trisha winced. Dad's hair was sticking up at odd angles, so she guessed her screech had woke him up, or maybe Mum had.

Just looking at Mum was making her embarrassment return tenfold.

Their eyes rested on Trisha and her mum ran towards her, enveloping her in a bone-crushing hug. When she pulled back, her eyes were fierce. "Are you all right?"

"Y-Yes," Trisha stuttered, the envelope crushed in her arms.

"We thought someone had broken in," Dad said, walking closer. Now that the shock had diminished he looked weary, but Trisha saw nervousness on his face as well. "Why were you in here?"

Shame and embarrassment enveloped her, and Trisha's eyes pricked with tears. She shouldn't have let her curiosity get the best of her. She should've just left when she saw her dad wasn't in. "I-I wanted to find you, Dad." She sniffled.

From behind her parents, she spotted Maes poking his head in. She ignored him.

Her dad had just been about to open his mouth, most likely to point out the obvious – he wasn't here so why did she stay – when she threw the envelope at him, yelling, "Things like that shouldn't be left around, Dad, ew!" She hoped it was enough to postpone the lecture, and possibly the grounding.

Her parents stared wide-eyed at her, and she gulped when her dad blanched once he saw the envelope. If he knew what it was just by looking at it, then he definitely looked through those pictures a lot.

She really didn't need to know that.

Before Dad could lean down to grab the envelope from his feet, Mum snatched it so fast Trisha didn't thought it possible.

"E-Ed," Dad croaked, panic in his voice. He made a move to snatch it back, but Mum held it out of reach.

Dad's reaction was enough to let Trisha know her mum wasn't aware he had those pictures. It was a small comfort.

Mum blanched once she laid eyes on them, probably mortified that her child had seen them.

"What the fuck, Roy!?" she yelled, making Trisha wince. At least the spotlight was off her.

Her dad's cheeks became red, just as Mum went on, "I thought you'd thrown them away!"

Trisha blushed.

"For you I had," Dad muttered, giving Trisha a quick glare.

Mum yelled something back and showed him one of the pictures, babbling about how Trisha had seen that and 'what the hell, bastard', and she noticed her dad's eyes going over it, his expression changing. It was weird, and she was getting really uncomfortable.

When her dad leaned closer to her mum, an arm around her waist and whispered, "Do you still have that dress?" Trisha decided it was time to leave.

She inched towards the door, her face on fire as she saw her mum's eyes become hooded, the bright golden turning into that molten gold it was in the pictures.

"You're such a pervert," Trisha heard her purr, and practically ran the rest of the way out the office.

Focusing on her breathing, she fell on the couch and tried to calm her rapidly beating heart, barely noticing when Maes sat next to her. He patted her back and she jumped, surprised.

"You thought they were innocent saints, didn't you?" he mumbled, glancing at her.

Trisha cringed, nodding. Apparently though, that wasn't the case.

Maes snorted. "Mum's so horny, man, it's unreal."

Trisha spluttered, her face becoming red once again as she stared at her brother incredulously. "What?"

Her brother raised an eyebrow, sighing, his cheeks becoming red as well. "I guess you wouldn't know; you're not the one whose bedroom is next to theirs..."

"Oh my God!" Trisha exclaimed, her hands flying to her cheeks. "Don't tell me you can..."

"Why'd you think I bought those earplugs? Mum's so fucking horny it's unreal. I can't sleep with the noises she makes every night."

Trisha stared on, practically feeling her innocence crumbling as the seconds passed.

"Either Dad's really good, or Mum just likes it that much. I caught them making out once in the kitchen, they were so absorbed in each other they didn't even notice me making a whole sandwich. Mum makes some weird noises though, fucking hell."

"Maes, stop!" Trisha screeched, scrunching her eyes shut.

Maes laughed, and Trisha shot up from her seat on the couch and stomped towards the stairs, her face on fire.

"I'm going to play with my dolls!"

A/N I swear to God, I've got soooo many head-canons that have to do with their kids. It's according to my mood as well. Sometimes I want them to have twins, other times I want them to have one kid, and other times I want them to have a million. It's just...weird...