39
"IANTO!" the voice was loud and full of anger, making Kev look up with surprise as Jack stomped into the room, "What the hell are you doing?"
"Eating soup, I believe Sir" Ianto answered without looking up from the dinner roll he was buttering.
"I was looking everywhere, then they say he's up and you've gone walkies with him!" Jack raged, his arms flapping about, the Kev felt his anger flare as he recognised the Captain.
"Excuse me Captain Harkness" He rose to tower over the man with his Hawaiian physique making him bearlike, "Did you just refer to me as a dog?"
Jack blinked and looked at Kev like he had only just noticed him there, the grimace one of annoyance not fear, "Back off, I'm taking to my bloody husband."
Ianto rose and dabbed politely at his mouth with a napkin, looking absurdly proper as Jack seethed like a three year old about to hold its breath until it got its way.
"Cariad, this is Kev Momoa. He is Hawaiian and was a green beret. You've met I believe, given his instant dislike for you" Ianto waved a hand at the tower of muscle bristling over Jack, "gorgeous isn't he."
Jack did seem to stop breathing as his eyes widened, as did his mouth and then he blinked. "Momoa. You were there at the Queen's bash at Balmoral that time! You beat me at chess!"
Kev grunted in reply and Jack frowned as he tried to work out why he didn't like him, then his face cleared and he snorted as he pointed at Ianto, "He's protecting you? That's rich. Wait. You think I called you a dog? I wasn't calling anyone a…shit. That was rude. Baby, I'm sorry that was a shitty term to use. Sorry love."
Ianto seemed to soften as he accepted the apology and Kev stepped back to show he was not going to pursue it either.
"Jack was referring to me as the dog and it was unintentional" Ianto turned to Kev, "You see, my husband is a hot head."
"Oi! I'm right here!" Jack growled, then to Kev's surprise he smiled warmly at Ianto, "I love you so much, that foot spa you brought back is sooooo nice. Can we look for the lavender oils today?"
Kev blinked at the sudden change in personality and syrupy sweetness then turned to see Ianto smiling back as he nodded, "Whatever you want Cariad, you know I love lavender in our bedding too."
"Oooo, yeah" Jack gushed, "Wash it with it in the water, yummy!"
Ianto sighed and shook his head as Nainny appeared and raced over to ask Jack if he was OK, did he want food, was he feeling OK?
Kev was surprised at the level of attentiveness, then as Jack spoke his hands moved to rub his belly, the little …rounded…Kev blinked as he recalled a conversation they had while playing that chess game about children and the rain.
"Are you pregnant?" he blurted out and Jack swung to look at him with shock, "Only, that time we played chess and I asked if you had kids, you sort of shuddered and said something about the rain and birth control. You were pretty baked, had drunk over half a bottle of her finest scotch but you seemed so…believable. You…oh wow. Just…wow."
Kev took a chair as he stared into space. Processing as Jack grimaced and sat too, still rubbing his belly.
"I remember you" Jack finally said, "I propositioned you, you laughed and said I wasn't your type. I asked what your type was and you said…you said…free."
"I knew what Torchwood was to you, and you to them" Kev nodded, "I knew you were as much a piece of property as a figurehead. Don't get me wrong, I like flesh regardless of gender but…you seemed too…distant to everyone like you were watching us through Perspex glass. Ya know?"
"After Lisa" Ianto said softly "That's the weekend you went up to brief her on what happened in the Barrens wasn't it. You came back more yourself."
"Yeah" Jack sighed, "Lizzie always knew how to kick me up the arse and push me forward. Loved Balmoral too, so much nicer than the London pad."
"The Palace" Ianto said dryly.
"Shit" Kev said softly, "The Palace. Yeah. My usual haunt. I was one of the security for the vaults."
"Vaults?" Martha had arrived and sat with a baby on her knee that reached for Ianto with big eyes until he took it and cuddled it to him like a teddy bear.
"Yeah, the huge bunker under the palace. God. It was built after the blitz. Bomb proof, atmospherically controlled and it had this…technology that we were told was none of our business but I do remember one of the engineers saying something about them not being able to get it to the degree Doctor Sato had it at, but the bubble would hold as long at the was sunlight to repower the batteries or something."
Jack blinked as Ianto started to laugh. "A time bubble, you're saying there is a Doomsday Bunker under Buckingham Palace with a Time Bubble keeping it and everything inside pristine as the day it was activated!"
"Yeah, apparently this Doctor Sato was a bloody genius" Kev snorted as Tosh and Owen entered.
"Thank you" Tosh said as she reached for a bun, "I do have an IQ of over 180"
Now it was Kev's turn to blink.
"Corporal Momoa, meet Doctor Sato." Ianto said with glee.
Tosh looked over her glasses rims at him and smiled softly.
Kev wondered how deep down the rabbit hole they were going with this mad hatter's tea party.