OK, EVERYONE! WE'RE CLOSER TO THE END.
I'M THINKING FIVE MORE CHAPTERS AT MOST.
HERE'S THE NEXT CHAPTER.
PLEASE LET ME KNOW YOUR THOUGHTS AND ENJOY!! :-)
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CHAPTER 39: Please read and comment.
After Sophie left the NICU area, Chase remained on the bench just outside the NICU room where his seven- week old patient was being treated for bronchiolitis.
He finally wiped the stray tear off his cheek roughly with his fingertips and forced himself off the bench, a surge of pain shooting up his ankle as he did so.
Cursing silently to himself, he limped back into the NICU ward, where the young mother of the newborn was hovering over her child, who was still in her bassinette.
Chase glanced at the monitor, noticing that the baby's vitals were normal and then made the appropriate notation in her chart.
"Fever's down," Chase commented as he wrote.
"I'm the worst mother in the world," the young mother stated flatly.
Chase raised his eyebrows as the woman, who looked incredibly tired and defeated.
"I doubt that," he said in a somewhat reassuring voice, looking back at the chart.
"I didn't even think to take her temperature," she said with a disgusted laugh.
Chase tsked. "She's only seven weeks old. Give yourself a break. You're kinda new at this."
The woman exhaled and nodded, saying nothing else for a moment.
"…I didn't think it was gonna be like this," she finally said.
Chase looked up once more, remaining quiet.
"She was an accident," the mother admitted. "I never wanted to get pregnant."
Thinking of Sophie, Chase felt his stomach turn.
"And when my parents found out, they kicked me out of the house," she added.
"… What about your… the baby's father?" Chase asked delicately.
"He split before she was born," she said with a shrug in a resigned tone.
"Can you imagine your entire life changing because of one stupid mistake?" she asked him.
At that moment, Chase realized that he had no idea what had happened to Sophie after her miscarriage. If she was alone or scared or if anyone had helped her get through it.
"…Yes," he replied softly.
"Dr. Chase?" a familiar female voice said from behind him.
Chase looked up and saw Cuddy standing in the doorway of the NICU.
"Do you have a minute?" she asked him.
"Excuse me," Chase said politely to the mother, who nodded in response.
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A few moments later, Chase and Cuddy were sitting on a couch in one of the doctor's lounges down the hall from the NICU.
"How's the patient?" Cuddy asked.
"Better. The fever's already down and she's breathing better. She can probably go home in a day or two," he replied.
"How about the mom?" she asked.
Chase sighed. "Still beating herself up."
"…Yeah, well…" Cuddy trailed off with a slight chuckle, looking down at her lap.
Chase gave her a sympathetic smile, knowing she was blaming herself inside for losing the baby.
"I'm sorry I haven't been by to see you," he said sincerely.
"It's ok. You've been busy," she told him.
Chase nodded, still smiling at her.
But the smile didn't reach his eyes.
"It's ok to ask me how I am, you know," she told him in a joking manner.
Chase couldn't help but laugh at that.
"How are you?" he asked.
"Busy. I've been planning the bowling night fundraiser," she replied, her face brightening a bit.
"Yeah, I saw that," he commented.
"So are you gonna sign up for a team? I hear you're quite the bowler," she coaxed him.
"…I don't think so," he said with a modest smile.
"Why not?" she asked in disappointment.
"Don't think you're allowed to use a cane while you bowl," he said in self deprecation as he lifted up his cane for emphasis.
"House doesn't use his cane while he bowls," she pointed out, a smile tugging at her lips.
Chase chuckled slightly. "Yeah, well, we can't all be as great as House."
This time, it was Cuddy's turn to give Chase a sympathetic smile of her own. She placed her hand on his arm affectionately.
"Sophie misses you," Cuddy confessed.
For some reason, this comment irked him.
"Is that why you're down here? To try to get Sophie and I back together?" he asked with a slight edge to his voice.
"I just wanted to tell you that she misses you," she repeated.
"Yeah? Well I miss her too," Chase stated angrily.
Cuddy kept her eyes fixated on him as his jaw hardened, knowing that he was about to crack.
"Everything reminds me of her. Most of her stuff is still in the condo and I don't want her to come get it because it means that she's really gone. Do you know that I still haven't changed the pillowcases since she's moved out because they smell like her?!" he ranted, gesticulating his arms as he spoke.
"Then why aren't you running after her and begging her to come back?" she demanded.
"Because she LIED to me," he stated, his voice full of hurt.
"Because she didn't think that you'd still feel the same way about her if you knew the truth," Cuddy told him firmly.
Chase's eyes were blazing, his gaze locked on hers.
Having nothing else to say, he finally looked away from her and down at the floor.
"Did she tell you that she went to see Dr. Sobol a few days ago?" Cuddy asked him.
At this, Chase looked up in shock.
He knew that Sobol was Cuddy's OB/ Gyn and that Sophie would have only gone to him if there was a problem.
"No," Chase said, shaking his head, worried. "Is she ok?"
"She wanted to know what her chances were of restoring her fertility if she had the adhesions surgically removed," Cuddy told him.
Chase's felt a lump form in his throat.
"…What did he say?" Chase asked, his lips parted, still stunned at what she had just told him.
"He said… there was no chance," she replied in an apologetic, raspy tone.
Chase felt a horrible feeling surge through his chest.
His entire body sank as he absorbed the news, staring at the floor once more, wishing he could just sink right into it.
"She told me that if he had said 'slim' instead of 'none,' that she would've done it in a heartbeat," she added.
Chase's mouth turned down, the ache in his chest intensifying.
"…For me?" he whispered sadly.
"Yeah."
Just then Chase's cell phone rang in the back pocket of his scrubs.
"I'll see you later," Cuddy said, as she got up off the couch.
Chase nodded and opened his phone, not bothering to look at the Caller ID.
"Dr. Chase," Chase muttered into the phone.
"Dr. Chase, this is Dr. Kenneth Eng. How are you?" a friendly male voice said on the other end.
It took a moment for Chase to realize that the man on the other end was the surgeon who had operated on his ankle months ago at NYU hospital.
"I'm… fine. It's… nice to hear from you," Chase managed to say after a moment, surprised to hear from the doctor.
"What's your schedule look like this week?" Eng asked.
"… Not too bad. Why?" Chase asked, confused.
"We're running a Clinical trial that I think you'd be interested in," Eng replied.
"… You… need a doctor from another hospital to help you run a Clinical trial?" Chase asked in bewilderment.
Eng chuckled. "Not a doctor. A PATIENT," he clarified.
Chase furrowed his brow, still confused.
"How does tomorrow afternoon sound?" Eng asked.
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THE NEXT DAY:
At around four pm the next day, Chase was sitting across from Dr. Eng at his large mahogany desk, reading over the packet that described the specifics of the Clinical trial that Eng had told him about over the phone the day before.
"It's LLLT, or Low Level Laser Therapy. It's similar to laser acupuncture. Basically, we'd use a 'cold laser' with a wavelength between 600 and 1000 nanometers on your ankle. There'd be no sensation or burning on your skin," Eng began.
Chase nodded, still skimming through the papers in front of him.
"The theory is that the laser can penetrate deeply into the tissues to relieve pain. We've seen excellent results in Phase I testing," Eng continued.
"How often would I have to receive treatment?" Chase asked.
"We'd have to base that on the degree of success after your first treatment. In Phase I, some of our patients have been pain free for a month before they needed additional treatment. Others have made it four months without pain," Eng replied.
"What are the side effects?" Chase inquired.
"So far, we haven't seen any adverse reactions to the treatments."
"What's the success rate?"
"Sixty- eight percent," Eng stated.
At this, Chase looked up, his eyebrows raised in surprise.
"Wow," he said, truly impressed.
"Yep," Eng agreed.
"But… if it didn't work…" Chase began tentatively.
"If it didn't work, you'd be no worse off than you are now," Eng interrupted.
"But if it did work… I'd be pain free for an extended period of time," Chase said carefully.
"Yes," Eng agreed.
"And… if I kept returning for treatments…" Chase began.
"Assuming they continued to work, you could possibly be pain free for the rest of your life," Eng said, nodding his head.
Chase stared across the desk at Eng, letting all of the information he'd just received sink in.
Eng stared at him from across the desk, patiently waiting for his response.
"…I have to think about this," Chase finally said.
"Of course," Eng replied.
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Later that same night, Sophie, House and Wilson were at Wilson's apartment.
While Wilson was cleaning up the dishes from dinner, House and Sophie were playing Texas Hold 'Em in the dining room for chips.
Sophie sat across from House at Wilson's dining room table, her arms folded across her chest as House dealt the flop, the first three community cards.
"Check," Sophie stated, not even bothering to check her hole cards for a second time.
House turned down his lower lip, slightly surprised that she didn't bet.
"Fifty," he said, tossing five chips into the middle of the table with a shrug.
Sophie half- heartedly threw in five chips to match his bet, saying nothing.
House then dealt the next card, watching her intently, waiting for her to make her move.
She glanced at the cards and then back up at him.
"Check," she repeated without emotion, her arms still folded across her chest.
House arched his eyebrow.
He then quickly counted out some chips and pushed them into the middle of the pot.
"I raise five hundred," he challenged.
She silently counted out five hundred dollars worth of chips and pushed them into the pot, her facial expression not changing in the least.
"Either you're check raising me to force me to go All In and you've got a monster in the hole, or you're bluffing and you've got rags," House declared knowingly.
"Are you trying to break your record for the most amount of poker terms you can use in one sentence?" she asked him in irritation.
"My personal best is eight," he snarked.
Sophie exhaled loudly. "Just deal the next card."
"No," he stated.
"Why not?" she asked.
"Because it's NEITHER," he replied. "You don't give a crap about this game,"
"It's not like we're playing for real money—" she began.
"You NEVER play for money," House pointed out.
By now, Wilson had drifted out of the kitchen and was standing in the doorway, listening to House and Sophie's conversation.
"Well maybe I'm just not in the mood to play," she said with a shrug.
"You're a poker addict. You're ALWAYS in the mood to play," House said.
At this, Sophie looked down at the table and started absentmindedly shuffling a few of her chips between her fingers, a trick she'd mastered over the years.
"…Chase said I don't have the right to care about him because I broke off the engagement," she mumbled.
"He's right," House said.
Sophie looked up in shock.
"You AGREE with him?!" she exclaimed.
"He trusted you. And you broke that trust by lying to him," House replied simply.
"If I had told him the truth, he would've left me in Boston and never looked back!" she said.
"Which means YOU never would've moved in with him, gotten engaged and had your heart broken," he pointed out.
"So you're telling me it's better not to take a risk?! To just play it safe your whole life?!" she demanded, her eyes locking with his, becoming more agitated as she spoke.
Upon hearing this, House looked away and suddenly became incredibly interested in the game again.
He dealt the next card, refusing to answer her.
And a curt laugh escaped Sophie's lips.
"This isn't about me. It's about YOU," Sophie stated, almost menacingly.
Wilson was watching the two of them, completely fascinated.
"You and Cuddy took a RISK by getting pregnant. And now that she lost the baby, YOU'RE feeling more hurt than you've ever felt in your entire life and you HATE it," Sophie said, the emotions pouring out in her voice.
"I'm sorry I'm not a masochist like Chase," House snarked.
"No, you're just full of SHIT," Sophie spat out.
At this, both House and Wilson's eyebrows popped up.
"You take risks on patients every single day. But when it comes to yourself, you're PETRIFIED to make a move," Sophie told him.
"If I was petrified, I never would've gotten together with Cuddy," House shot back.
"And you haven't had a real conversation with her about the miscarriage since it happened!" Sophie exclaimed.
"That's because she's been too busy with this stupid fundraiser—" House began defensively.
"BECAUSE YOU THINK IT'S YOUR FAULT THAT SHE LOST THE BABY!" Sophie yelled out.
House felt his breath catch in his throat.
He was too stunned to speak.
Wilson's jaw dropped, just as stunned.
"House…" Wilson began.
Just then, the doorbell rang.
None of them moved a muscle.
"I'll get it," Sophie whispered, her eyes still fixated on House for a moment before she walked away.
"House… is she right?" Wilson asked him once Sophie went to get the door.
House looked up from the cards and up at Wilson, with deep sadness in his eyes.
But he didn't respond.
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Sophie could feel her emotions churning within her, still reeling from the heated conversation she'd just had with House about Cuddy and Chase.
She opened the door forcefully without bothering to ask who it is.
But when she saw Chase on the other side of the door, she gasped.
"Is there somewhere we can talk?" Chase asked her.
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A few moments later, Chase and Sophie were sitting outside on the front step of Wilson's apartment building in the warm June night air.
She listened quietly and intently as Chase told her all of the details of the Clinical trial that Dr. Eng had invited him to participate in.
When he finished, he kept his gaze on her, waiting for her response.
It took her a moment to formulate a response.
"…Robbie, that's… AMAZING! When do you start?" she finally asked him, her eyes wide.
"I'm not doing it," he stated quietly.
Her mouth gaped open in shock as she felt a horrible sensation go through her chest.
"Are you CRAZY?!" she blurted out.
He looked down at the ground in silence, a lock of hair falling in his eyes.
She stared at him, still thinking he was completely insane.
"This is a chance for you to get your life back! You can do everything you used to do! You can get rid of the drugs, the cane, you can even go snowboarding again if you wanted to! Why would you ever even THINK of not doing this?!" she demanded of him.
He looked up from the ground, his eyes shimmering with tears.
"Because there's no reason to get my life back if I can't share that life with you," he replied, his voice choking up as he spoke.
At this, her breath caught.
She stared back at him, her chest rising and falling with shallow breaths as a sensation unlike any other she had ever felt penetrated through her.
"… Robbie…" was all she could manage to say.
"I'm not trying to manipulate you or make you feel guilty…" he began, his voice quavering, taking her hand in his.
Her heart hammered in her chest as he looked deeply into her eyes.
"I'm just… trying to show you—" he said.
"That you love me more than anything," she finished for him, barely able to get the words out.
"Yes," he nodded vigorously.
Her lower lip quivered as he placed both hands on her cheeks and leaned forward, pressing his forehead against hers, closing his eyes.
"…Please come back to me," he begged softly, the tears finally escaping.
"…I don't want to be in pain anymore," he cried.
She nodded against his forehead, feeling her own cheeks becoming wet.
She then reached up to touch his face as she brushed her lips against his.
He passionately kissed her back, completely ignoring the people walking by on the street and the fact that Wilson was standing in the doorway with a grin on his face.
TBC…