AN: Thanks for the support! You guys rock! Mother-son fluff in the past! But sadly also some angst (this family needs some serious help!)...but of course also lots of silliness...A yet another long chapter that has been divided into three...
The OT trio (Leia, Luke and Han) just doesn't seem to be able to agree on what is the best way to deal with Ben, so poor Ben is being torn apart...
Chapter thirty eight - Darkside sickness of the past
Ben, who was burning hot because of his fever, still clung as tightly to his mother's chest as if she were an oasis in a desert and he would die of thirst, the minute he let go of her. A thing he hadn't done since she was breastfeeding him...
The kriff! That's creepy!
KR (goes and fixes it)
...since he was a small child and needed her mothering desperately.
You can fix the...story...erm memory?
KR: It seems to be one of my awesome (new) powers. ;)
Can you always do this...?
KR: Nah... o:)
Somehow, I don't believe that...
KR: Not my problem what you believe in...
Thankfully his mother didn't mind his babyish behavior, who held just as tightly onto him, with one hand while she unpacked from a huge and heavy bag she had brought with her. Sunlight streamed through the window, which made Ben feel even warmer, but as he felt warm inside of his heart, his didn't mind that much.
"What? When did you have time to pack his things? I thought you came straight here." asked Luke, when he returned from whatever he had been doing probably taking care of his school in some way, as his sister kept endlessly unpacking and put everything on Ben's night stand.
"It's my emergency Ben-bag. I always keep it with me," said Leia, as she arranged everything she deemed necessary for him to get better. A thermometer, medicine, a water bottle, a warm blanket...
"What's that...?" Ben hadn't heard about a bag like that and his mother lifted his arm to put the thermometer under it to take his temperature, before going back to unpacking.
"Oh...should I get one as well?" asked Luke, as if he was expecting them to be sold in regular stores.
"No, he staying with you," said Leia firmly and finally answered Ben's question, while rummaged through the Ben-bag with her Ben-less hand. "It has enough of your clothes, toys...ah, this will be perfect while you are is sick..."
KR: Isn't that the bag your father said your mom kept in the resistance base? The one with the photo albums, your clothes, toys...
That one was real...?
KR: You were in doubt...?
I didn't remember ever seeing it...
KR: It's right there, in your memory!
Well, I forgot...sheesh...I mean...I forgot this ever happened...if it did...
KR: One day, you will forget your own name...
That's sounds ominous...
KR: It is...I mean you even forgot Rey's name...
I did not! Oh...wait...why? How?
KR: No idea...or do I...?
You know...you can be more confusing than Yoda sometimes.
KR: Confusing...? Yoda was not confusing...if you think that, then you are even more stupid and more simple than I thought!
Sigh...I didn't mean it literally...just the way he...talked...you know kind...of backwards...
KR: Oh...that makes sense...sorry...I will be clearer from now on...
Really?
KR: Nah, that's no fun...
(Ben growls)
"Mom, I'm too old for this," whined Ben when she pulled up the ewok onesie and his teddy bear, Wicket.
Eeeh...the ewok onesie again! Where did that thing even come from?! I thought it was only nightmare..I mean in that fluffy dream...is this a nightmare...I mean a fluffy dream...?
KR: No...this happened...
I burned that thing! I swear!
KR: Clearly, she has a extra one.
Why?
KR: Because you look so cute in it!
I DO NOT!
"Not when you are sick." Leia removed the thermometer after it beeped and frowned at the reading. "There is no reason for you to pretend to be a big boy, while mommy is here." Swift as lightning his mother put the thermometer back in the bag, Wicket on his bed and pulled his sweaty night robe off him, to dress him in the onesie.
"Okay...thanks mommy...and thanks...for being here..." he mumbled through the fabric as she pulled it gently over his head and helped him dress in the onsie, by standing him up and dragging him through it, like he couldn't dress himself.
"Anytime, sweetie." His mother put him under the comforter and arranged the Rey-pillow he had been using as a plushie under his head to make him more comfortable, which made him gasp in shock over the treatment of Rey, but she didn't notice anything or at least didn't comment on his strange reaction for using pillow as a pillow.
"This will keep you nice and toasty..." She pulled the ewok hood up and put Wicked into his arms. "...and that same time cool you down, so you won't overheat. Have you been drinking enough water?" Leia rested her hand on his head to take his temperature, like she hadn't trusted the medical one enough.
"A lots of blue milk," he murmured, as he tried to get his Rey-pillow again in his arms, instead of under his head.
"Hmm...that's a bit too sugary. Drink water..." Leia handed him a water bottle from the night stand and he obeyed her immediately and gulped it down. Then she turned to Luke, all business-like, who finally got a job to do, when she was in her full mom-mode, instead of just standing there like a statute. "Can you hand me the medical bag. I want to check out that sleeping pill, you told me you gave him."
Luke nodded and went to fetch the bag at once, which was in one corner of the room.
"He also gave me stink fish oil...maybe that made me sick," said Ben accusingly and hope that was the case, so he would never ever had to taste that thing again.
Before Luke had a chance to protest that ludicrous accusation, Leia shook her head. "It shouldn't. It's healthy for you."
"But I threw up after it," whined Ben, that nothing ever went his way and reached for the Rey-pillow, to replace Wicket for her, as his plushie.
"Hmm...then you must have been sick before," Leia commented as Luke handed her the sleeping pill bottle and she began to read of it, at the same time she talked to her son, since she always had to multitask, like she was moving at lightspeed.
"Don't worry, I'm not going to give you any fish oil, but a very delicious cold medicine..." Her eyes widened in shock over one particular line on it and she shook the bottle in rage, like she was thinking about throwing it at Luke. "That sleeping pill is way too strong for him. It can knock out a wookie!"
"But it didn't work for him...until extremely late..." said Luke and removed the bottle for her trembling hand and put it back in the medial bag, before she could follow her son's example of throwing his things in anger or breaking them.
"It could've have had the opposite effect..." His mother stopped when she saw how Ben was suddenly clutching the pillow and using Wicket, the teddy bear, as a pillow and set about to remedy that reverse image, to Ben's frustration who wanted to have some control over his life, no matter how wrong his mother felt it looked.
"In fact maybe that's why he went nuts." Leia wrestled the pillow from Ben's grasp and put it back under his head and the teddy bear back in his arm. "Never ever use this pill again, it's too dangerous for children...and don't use it in general..." She lectured Luke, who nodded to every of her demands, like she ruled the galaxy.
"So I'm not in trouble...?" said Ben, as he eyed the Rey-pillow under his head, that had no business being there, despite being a fluffy pillow meant for exactly that position.
"Not at the moment..." growled his mother, as she saw how he reached back for the pillow, despite her earlier correcting of his upside down life.
Yikes!
KR: Yikes!
"I promise I will never use it...and I'm sorry. How long to do you plan on staying here?" said Luke, like he was both afraid of his whirlwind of sister that took control of everything in his life and yet at the same time, was happy that he had someone he could count on to take control, when everything was out of the hyperspace lanes, especially her son.
"Until my son is well again," said Leia, who gave up on making Ben putting the Rey-pillow back under his head, where it belonged and instead, she picked up an extra pillow from her Ben-bag. Put that under his head and Wicked beside the Rey-pillow in his arms. "Sleep, son." She stroked his hair, that was visible under his ewok hoodie and kissed his forehead.
Then I never want to be well again...
"You still haven't reached Han?" whispered Leia in the dark, when she thought Ben had finally gone to sleep, clutching both Wicket and Rey under the comforter.
"No, for some reason I can't get through to him...I hope nothing has happened..." whispered Luke.
"How come you got his number all of a sudden?" asked Ben and opened his eyes with great intensity, as if it was question he had to know the answer to, then all would fall into place. Even though his eyes were misty from fever, he didn't tone down his stare in the least. The room was dimly lit, after the curtains had been drawn but small light escaped underneath them.
"What do you mean? I just redialed," said Luke surprised by his over reaction, where he held the holo-viewer in his hand and he stood on a standby, like he was expecting to be able to run out the door at moments notice. Maybe to get Han or be able to flee, if his sister would get mad at him for some reason, but the latter one was very likely.
"Ben, sweetie, you have to rest to get better. Let us take care of it," said his mom sweetly, where she sat in chair by his bedside and patted his paw-like hand because of the onesie, to let him know that she was still there.
"Oh..." Then Ben shot up sharply and got dizzy from the sudden movement, but he had to know this, so he asked despite his stinging headache. "Wait...he didn't call through the holo viewer..." He pointed with his paw at the holo-viewer in Luke's hand. "But the com-link..." He pointed at the duffel bag at the bottom of his bed, though he didn't know if the com-link was still there, after Luke had found it. "Come to think of it...how did he know he could call that one...? Did he have your number..?" He looked at Luke, who seemed to have been caught in bright lights, as he started to sweat under Ben's interrogation.
Mini me has point.
KR: Hmm...at least he's way more observant than you. You didn't notice that detail...
You are right...I have...to pay more attention...
KR: Like I told you from the start...
"Stop overthinking everything. You will get a headache. You probably have a headache because you think to hard," said Luke and chuckled at his own joke, but couldn't meet his nephew's hard, but fleeting gaze.
"I want answers," he said firmly despite everything spinning in front of his eyes. He needed to find a steady point, something to hold onto, in his ever changing world.
"No, your uncle is right. Lay back, down," said his mother, who noticed his weak condition despite him acting tough and pushed him gently down. "We will find a way to contact your dad, don't worry. Close your eyes and relax." She rubbed her hand over his paw-like knuckle.
"You don't need to...call him...please don't bother him," said Ben, who closed his eyes as he thought back to their last call and how he had all this time tried to reach him because of some foolish hope, just to be disappointed. He didn't want to go through that again. He didn't want to establish connection, only to lose it.
"You are not a bother," said Luke, as he tried to ring again, by clicking in the numbers.
"You are never a bother." Leia said and Ben could, tell through the force, how his mother glared at the com-link, when it didn't even go to voicemail and didn't even have a dial. "He better not have turned of the com-link or I will kill him."
"Mom, don't kill dad," pleaded Ben and opened his eyes to look at his mom, like she meant it literally and Leia turned to him with a reassuring smile.
"Okay, sweetie, I won't," She knit her brows in anger, like a darksider. "But he will certainly get an earful."
"Mom?"
Leia's anger disappeared instantly as she went into mom-mode. "What sweetie? Try to rest."
"Master..." He corrected himself, when thinking to his earlier conversation with his uncle about the use of the master title. "Uncle said no one could ever come to this super secret place...that you would need a map and he had some kind of shield on it to prevent people from ever landing here."
"I don't understand, what are you asking?" Leia looked at Luke, who seemed to be as clueless as her, or at least pretended to be.
"How come you could get here?" said Ben, like he was trying to solve a mystery.
"No, I said your father couldn't. Do you really think I would ban your mom from doing that...? Or well I...tried..." Luke bit his lip and his sister glared at him for that attempt.
"Ban...?" Without removing his head from the pillow, Ben looked between the secretive siblings, hoping for an answer.
"She's not going to take you away from your important training, she knows better..she knows what is at stake," said Luke and Leia nodded with a serious expression. "Of course I do."
"What's at stake?" asked Ben and his mother patted his hood and said in her sweet voice, like he was a much smaller child. "Don't worry your little head about it, sweetie, just focus on getting better."
"How did you get here...? How did you find this place?" asked Ben, who had not given up on solving this mystery, though the problem was he didn't even know what he was trying to solve in the first place.
"Your uncle told me where here is and I flew here. Simple as that. Now rest. Don't worry, I will stay here until you get better," she kissed his head, like that would help his cold and that mystery that was eating him alive for some reason, go away.
He grasped her hand with his paw. "I don't want you to leave...ever."
KR: So much for never going to talk to my parents again...
Well if she came...and called...
KR: You clearly don't know what is real anymore...
Well, this can't be real...this is...a dream...memory...it must be...it's way too nice...expect that strange mystery I'm trying to solve...
KR: So from your point of view...everything that is nice...must be a dream...?
Yeah...
KR: That's...so sad...
You are feeling sorry for me...?
KR: Well...I don't know...or maybe you are just so stupid that you didn't realize how great your childhood was...
HEY! That's...not true! And you know...Snoke...he kind of messed up things for me...
KR: True.
And I didn't want to be in that stupid academy...but save Rey...plus I wanted to be a smuggler...still do...I think...with Rey...
KR: A stupid...smuggler...
Or a scavenger with Rey...
KR:...
With lightsabers.
KR: A tiny bit better...
"I don't want to either...but you are safe with your uncle...as long as he follows this schedule hundred percent. Our son will never get sick again on your watch," her mommy voice had changed into her business one and she handed a binder to Luke, that somehow had fit into her Ben-bag.
Luke oofed as he accepted the binder. "Yes, I'm sorry. I will be more careful..."
"And if you ever try to kill him again. I will kill you..." Her eyes got hooded over and Ben's swore, that the room started shaking a bit.
She cares...?
KR: Ahaha, it was fun enough to see my Leia threaten stupid Luke through the com-link, but doing it in person. Kriffing awesome!
So evil...but I agree, it is funny! Poor Luke...though...
"It won't happen again. I swear." Luke backed away from her in fright and started reading through the binder.
"You know, if I wasn't so worried about an outside threat to his life, I would take him right here and now," threatened Leia, as he she clasped her son's paw-like hand tightly.
Take me away...? She wanted to do that...? Then why didn't she?
KR: You know why...
"I know..." said Luke solemnly and sat on his bed, opposite them, to be more comfortable, as he continued reading or pretending to do, to avoid his sister's anger.
"What threat...?" asked Ben, annoyed to be left out of this serious conversation about his future.
ESS. EN. O. KAY. E.
KR: Why did you spell it...? Are you a cheerleader...?
ARR E YPSILION!
KR: Now for her...?
Always for her...not for him...or you...or anyone else...just her...
KR: VII A DEE ARR ERR!
"The same applies to you. You will take care of yourself. No more skipping meals, no more late bedtimes and no more going outside while underdressed. No more criminal activities...and no more darkside." said Leia in her full mommy mode to him, without answering his question. Maybe because she didn't really know the answer.
"Yes, mom. I promise..." said Ben and was rewarded with a pat on the head.
"Why were you sneaking outside in the rain...the other day?" She looked at Luke on the other bed, as she tried to puzzle the story together and he just nodded to show, that it was somewhat accurate, as he kept on reading through the binder about how to take care of Ben.
Ben sighed when he admitted the truth to everything, that led to his biggest tantrum and mumbled. "I wanted dad's number."
"Why?" asked his mom and it was hard to tell from her tone, whether she was surprised or not.
"I thought...dad came here..." said Ben and choked up, as he thought of the nice memory not being real and how it hurt too much. Because if it had been true, then it meant that his father had long forgiven him and they could have a fresh start. That Ben had forgiven him as well for his mistake and everything was well again.
"Your father?" Leia lifted her brows questionably, like that scenario could never happen.
"Yes...to bring him home..." said Ben and hang to the small hope that it did in fact happen, hoping to hear it from the one person that said hope was always there, no matter the darkness.
"No, he didn't." said Leia, who for once took all hope away from him.
"He didn't?" asked Ben, surprised that his hopeful mother had taken away his hope like that, but also because if she said it, then it should mean that it was true. That there shouldn't be any shadow of a doubt in his heart longer, but the problem was that meant his heart would be covered in darkness.
"He can't come here," said his mother firmly, which should've cemented the truth even further into Ben's mind. Like her words were some kind of law of the universe.
"I told you it was just a dream," said Luke, without looking up from his reading, who didn't hold the same power as his sister, but close to it.
"A dream...?" Ben still didn't believe it, not even though the truth-holder, his mom had said it. There was something that kept making him believe in it, but he wasn't sure what it was exactly. Hope? How long could he hope? Hope for what, exactly? His dad to come and give him a new life, that he wanted.
"Your father is not allowed here," said his mother, who kept on destroying his hopeful world he kept on trying to rebuild.
"Why not?" said Ben, who felt that mighty unfair, even though he was angry at his father for leaving him, he still wanted to see him and know the truth or at least just talk to him. Try to make things better.
"It's his fault you are here," said his mother in bitter voice, the voice she usually reserved for when the senators were driving her crazy with their stupidity.
"Dad's fault...?"
"His words," she said darkly, like it was some great sin. That words were worse than physical abuse, somehow. Which made sense, since she worked with words in the senate. Words that could become laws that could rebuild or destroy lives of millions or even billions in seconds.
"Oh..." Ben stared ahead. Of course. The ones, who had nearly plumbed him straight to the darkside. The ones, that made him question everything he thought he knew about his relationship with his father.
Since mom said dad never came, that must means that it's...hundred percent true...
KR: Yeah...because she never, ever lied to you...
The Vader, being my grandad thing was an exception. Why would she lie about this?
KR: I don't know...to protect you...
From what?
KR: How should I know what that rebelscum/my naughty daughter thinks...
Okay, now you went too far!
KR: What..are you going to do...beat me inside your own head...? We already tried that remember...?
Erm...I can annoy you...
KR: And you do such spectacular job at that...you should be the employe of the month...
Luke closed the binder with dramatic thud, like someone who was tired of waiting in a waiting room. He put the binder on a nightstand, most likely unfinished since he was a slow reader.
"Ben, get some sleep. I'm going to check out your uncle's office," his mother patted his paw-like hand and joined his uncle at the door.
"Why...?" Ben's anxiety skyrocketed. He thought they were long over that. He sat up and grabbed both Wicket and Rey in a death grip, like they could somehow help him with that.
"I'm going to estimate the damage to see how we can fix it and how much it will cost and how long it will take to rebuild it...I will be right back..." she smiled at him, but there was deep sadness in her eyes.
"Didn't you see enough through the hologram...?" pleaded Ben, like otherwise she would return with some big bill, he could only pay by selling his soul to the darkness.
"No, I saw very little. It's better to inspect in person," she said and Luke nodded, eager to get on with the rebuilding.
She came to do that...? Not to check up on me?
KR: Of course she did...of course she didn't...
"But...you are going to be so mad at me..." Ben sat up on his knees on the bed, with his paw-like hands, clasped together in a prayer. Wicket and Rey sat on his side, like they were judging him for his darkside, no matter the ridicules cute outfit he now wore.
"No, sweetie, it's over and done with, just focus on resting, son," said his mother.
"Your mom is right, you are sick and need to rest," said his uncle.
"But...you...will...leave me again..." A tear ran down Ben's cheek, as she spoke out the truth.
KR: She will anyway...
She didn't mean to stay...she never did...
Leia walked over to him and embraced him. "Sweetie, no matter what I will witness in that room, I came here, first and foremost, to make sure you would get better. Nothing will change that. You are my top priority," she mumbled into his hood.
Since when...?
KR: Since then...
"You promise...?" said Ben and looked up into her eyes, as if he was searching for the any tales of lie.
"I promise," she smiled at him, like someone who would never tell a lie.
KR: Hrmp.
I mean...she is politician...
"Can I come with you...I don't want to be left alone..." Ben looked around the small room and even though it was very comfy and hot because of the sunlight that streamed in, he felt cold in it, except for the small warmth from the Rey-pillow and even some from Wicket and being in that stupid ewok onsie. His fever didn't help to warm him up, as the cold was in his heart.
Leia glanced at Luke, who nodded, as he knew better than to leave his nephew alone unattended.
"As long as you promise, that you will go straight to bed when we return," said his mother sternly, as she always had to make a counter offer.
Ben smiled and put his paw-like hand on his chest. "I promise."
"Okay, sweetie. We won't be long," she put out his hand so he could take it with his paw.
"Wait..." Ben jumped back in bed and Leia and Luke regarded him with an identical surprised look on their twin faces.
"Wait for me. Things will be different when I return. I promise," Ben said to the Rey-pillow, that was soaked with his sweat and kissed the forehead part of the picture. It was a little smeared, since the ink wasn't water-proved so it left a little black spots on his cheeks.
Leia looked at Luke for answers what was going on with her son and that pillow, who only shook his head and muttered: "I will explain later."
KR: It's a pillow!
I didn't know Rey back then...I mean in person...what happened to that pillow? And doesn't look so good anymore...why did I use ink on it?
KR: I have no idea...but I think Rey might be a bit freaked out if she knew about it...a mean you having a pillow...with a picture of her...
Shit, you are right...
KR: And you left the Rey-pillow all alone in bed!
It's a pillow!
The absence of sound was deafening in the demolished office. Ben could hear his heartbeat thunder loud in his ear, along with the low wishing of the wind that easily got through the many big crack along the walls. Unlike the rest of the academy that was untouched, the office was utterly destroyed. Seemingly by a weapon. No human could do all this.
It was way worse than Ben remembered and in dread he looked up at his mother, by his side who held his paw-like hand in comfort, but now gasped and exclaimed as she took in the destruction in person:"What in the name of Alderaan...?"
It certainly looked like, when Alderaan had been destroyed. Ben gulped in fright. That was not something he wanted his mother to compare his tantrum to or any mass destruction, for that matter.
"What happened?" His mother turned to him with such a piercing gaze, he was surprised that she didn't bore hole through him or the cracked floor didn't fall completely under him and swallow him whole.
"I don't know..." he replied honestly, as he didn't remember the destruction itself and he wasn't sure, if his mom thought it a legitimate reason to trash his uncle's office to go and save some girl, Rey, he had dreamed about and had an unbelievable connection with, without even have ever met in real life.
He didn't get further in his thinking as his mother suddenly reached down for him, so he stiffened in fear, but she only picked him up and held him close to her chest, like he was her teddy bear, which fitted his outfit.
"Well make sure, it doesn't happen again," Leia scolded, like he has just forgotten to do his homework instead of acting like a human weapon and destroying everything in sight.
"We will make sure of it," said his uncle, who had been salvaging what was left of his precious Jedi relics and put a hand on his head, like that would help to keep Kylo inside of it.
"Do you think...I am monster...?" asked Ben, as if he wasn't sure himself about that answer, when he looked at the destruction he had caused and he didn't even remember in detail about.
Luke and Leia exchanged glances and shook their heads in firm negative and his mother added. "No, whoever did this...or made you do it...is one."
"Kylo..." said Ben, as if that was the answer to all the trouble he had caused.
KR: HEY! Oh...wait that is true. I did most of it...and it was fun! Smashing Jedi stuff!
"Then you have to get rid of this Kylo," said his mother firmly and Luke nodded, like they could just kick Kylo out, for being a awful hotel guest that had thrashed everything in his room.
"Yes, mom," said Ben sincerely, since it was easy to promise everything, even the impossible when she was right by his side.
"Good boy." She kissed his hood. "Let's get you back to bed."
KR: Hang on, what about the supreme leader...? Since when am I the bad guy...? Not that I want to get rid of him...yet...
Yet...? But, you do have a point...but I don't think I even knew about him...back then...or they did...
KR: As usual you know nothing...
I think after this memory trip, I know...something...
KR: Depends on whether you believe it...or not...
Believe...? I thought this was real...
KR: Yes, but you only believe in things...that suit you...
You have it the other way around!
KR: Do I?
YES!
"You are not going on that trip until he's healthy again."
Ben woke up the moment the sibling's discussion turned to him. Their were back in the bedroom, but he had been put straight to bed as soon as they returned from cataloguing the destroyed office and he had nearly fell asleep, as they kept ramping up more and more numbers to fix it. Very high and scary numbers. He was lucky if he would ever get an allowance again. He had Rey close to his chest, while Wicket was disregarded at the foot of the bed. He had no business being with his Rey and that teddy bear better not have done anything funny with her, while he was away.
"Of course," agreed Luke in low voice, so he wouldn't wake up Ben since he didn't know he was already awake.
"What trip? Am I going home...?" mumbled Ben hopeful, like in his sleep, without opening his eyes.
"No, sweetie...not yet," replied his mom. "Go back to sleep."
"But I'm sick," whined Ben, who suddenly couldn't even open his eyes. They felt like they were stuck together with little sandy grains.
"Which is why there is no reason for you to travel. You are safe here with us," said his mom firmly and patted his hand, indicating she was right by his bedside. "Sleep, honey."
"Then what trip are you talking about...?" asked Ben feverishly and was annoyed that once again his questions went unanswered about his fate.
"I was thinking, we, that is you and I, can go on a trip together to find more Jedi artefacts and the first temple. How does that kind of adventure sound?" replied Luke, like was planning the most excited vacation for them.
Ben shot up and opened up his eyes wide. "What...just us...? Wouldn't we kill each other...?" He rubbed at his sore eyes with his soft paw knuckles thanks to the onesie, to keep them open.
"Ben, don't joke like that..." his mother pinched his ear lightly in warning.
"Sorry mom." He rubbed his sore earlobe with one paw while the other tried to open his eyes, which for some reason only seemed to get darker.
Leia handed him a washcloth to help with his eyes. To Ben's surprise his paws were all black and he looked at the Rey pillow and saw how the picture of her was all smeared up. He gasped and stared at Luke, like it his was his fault, that Rey was nowhere to be found instead of him being unwise to use ink that could be solvable with water. But it was kind of true for the real Rey, since his uncle hadn't allowed him to go and get her or have someone do it.
Luke shook his head, like that uncle-nephew fight to the death, wasn't even a possibility for him. "No, no, it will be like a holiday. You really need a change of scenery...and I need a new collection..." He glanced sadly at the the ruined relics he had arranged on his bed, to take a better look of.
"I'm sorry.." Ben hung his head and went under the comforter with smeared Rey, since he was so exhausted because of his fever and couldn't keep awake or redraw her. At least he could meet her in...his dreams...
"I guess you were so hot tempered because of your rising fever," said Luke and shrugged, like it was no big deal.
"It probably didn't help. Still no excuse," scolded his mother, who would never excuse his actions in any way, even if they weren't his own. She allowed him to keep the dirty pillow for now since he was so attached to it and planned on washing it, when he had gone to sleep.
"I'm sorry...but we have to get Rey," mumbled Ben and hugged the ruined pillow tightly with his black paws like hands.
"Rey? What's that?" Leia looked at Luke for answers, even though Ben was literally hugging it, who instead said to Ben. "Don't worry about that. I'm sorry, I failed to see how you were really feeling. It won't happen again."
"What about all the other students...are you just going to leave them here...on their own?" pointed Ben out, thinking to the little knights of Ren, the once that were always making trouble.
"I trust them not to burn down the academy or the temple," said Luke with conviction and Leia nodded, though she didn't know the knights and what they were capable of.
"I don't..." muttered Ben.
I don't.
KR: I don't...
"They can either be here and get their distance learning from me through a hologram or they can go home and get it back home, while they wait for our return, their choice. Artoo will keep watch over those who stay behind. Our search for more Jedi knowledge will benefit them in the long run as well. I thought you wanted someone to pay attention just to you..." said Luke with tiny whine in this tone, that Ben was jumping up and down of joy because of his new brilliant plan, for them to hang out together.
"My family..." said Ben and his mother frowned at him for suggesting otherwise. "He is your family."
"And master," pointed Luke out.
"He's not my father," barked Ben.
"Yes, he is," said his mother and Ben's world came crashing down and his heart hammered in his chest, like it was trying to escape from it.
He sat up, shellshocked with the non exist Rey and said breathlessly: "What?"
"What...?" Luke was stunned, like he was expecting his sister to whip out a DNA test to prove her words.
WHAAAT?!
KR Ahahahaha!
"I mean you should obey him like he were your father," said Leia, when both Ben and Luke stared at her, like she had turned into Jabba the Hut and was singing Jedi Rock.
Don't scare me like that mom!
KR: You don't need much...
"Mom..." whined Ben that his mother had nearly given him a heart attack, while Luke looked disappointed for some reason.
"But, he hardly listens to his real father...and I'm his master..." whined Luke, when she had taken the possibility of a fatherhood away from him.
He wants to be my father...?
KR: He wants kids...you are the closest he has to one. Unless Rey, is his of course...or...you are in fact his, but he can't say it.
? That's...stupid...
KR: Is it...?
"You are giving me away?" Ben looked sharply at his mom and gulped in deep breaths and his mom, rubbed his back when she saw him start to descend into a familiar panic attack.
"No, of course not. You have two dads now, he will take care of you in the place of your father, who doesn't even call back when you are sick..." muttered Leia and glowered at the holo viewer, that Ben noticed first now was on the nightstand.
"I thought unca Wanwo was my other dad," said Ben, as he made a new list of his dad-list. A list where his own father was still unranked.
"Him too...but while with Luke, Luke's in charge," said his mom and his uncle, nodded happy to at least have that power over Ben.
"Don't be so hard on Han. I bet he has a real good reason..." said Luke to defend the honour of his old friend, who messed up occasionally but was in no way a bad man...or a father.
"There is no excuse for this...neglect..." said Leia dramatically, like Ben was on his deathbed and Han was off somewhere gambling and drinking all of their credits away, instead of working hard for the family.
"What if something happened to him?" pointed Luke out and Leia drew in a shuddered breath at that awful possibility, that didn't even seem to have occurred to her before.
"Not my Han!"
Ben stared ahead, afraid of the endless possibilities of death traps his stupid dad could get into with his foolhardiness. Never tell me the odds, indeed. He looked sadly at the pillow that was all dark to match his paw-like hands and the black spot on his cheeks.
"Don't worry. If something happened...we..." Luke patted his sister's shoulder to comfort her, but she was over her panic in minutes and with a steely look she said: "We will help him...however if I find out nothing did..." and she clenched her fist around the holoviewer, like it was Han.
KR: Your mom is scary.
She's not scary! She just..okay she can be a bit scary...sometimes...
KR: She has that from me...
I thought Vader was way more scary...
KR: Hrmph, if I had turned dark back in my time...I mean if I had been forcesensetive, he would have been groveling for me...I would have kicked his ass in a lightsaber duel...and then we would have made out...but, not on Mustafar that's dangerous!
You would have wanted that? To be the dominant one...?
KR: We could have switched...roles...balance...you know...
You kriffing worship Vader, so somehow I don't see that happening...
KR: And you worship Rey.
Well...yeah...your point being...?
KR: Rey = Vader
!
"So what do you say about that trip? We might perhaps...look for this Rey..." said Luke with a tempting voice, like he was offering him the deal of lifetime, but since when was Ben ever asked for anything. Everyone thought they could control his life, so he viewed that offer skeptically.
"What is this...Rey...?" Leia frowned at both nephew and uncle, like it was some cheap offer or a trick or was annoyed, that they were going on treasure hunt, but it was boys only so she wasn't invited.
"She is..." began Ben, but his mom cut him off, surprise evident in her voice. "She is a person...? A girl...?"
Ben nodded. "Yeah, my Rey. Does this mean we are going to Jakku?" He looked expectantly at his uncle, like it was the greatest place in the galaxy, only for the sake that Rey lived there.
"Perhaps..." said Luke in a mysterious voice as he looked over his ruined Jedi relics on his bed, like he was thinking about whether or not he could find something as precious as those on that planet. When Ben knew in fact the most precious person was to be found on that spot, out in the nowhere. A diamond in the junkyard.
"I guess it could be...fun...to go an travel, but is it safe...? I mean, I thought I was stuck here because I was in some kind of a danger...? Rey...I want Rey...but..." said Ben and dropped the pillow to grab his head with his paw-like black hands, because of an oncoming headache. His dirty hands smeared ink onto his ewok hood, making it black.
KR: I thought you wanted to go and look for Rey.
Yes, but not with stupid uncle but dad...and I don't believe him...and my mind is messed up because of my fever...
KR: That's nothing new...
And maybe even...Snoke...
KR: He was definitely doing something back then...
Stupid Snoke, stupid Luke, stupid dad...
"You are lying...we are not going to look for Rey...you think she is dangerous..." growled Ben and grabbed back on the black pillow, angry that his uncle had tried to trick him like that.
Luke only shrugged and showed no remorse for bringing his hope up like that and picked out a nearly whole relic and pocketed it.
"Who is...this Rey...?" His mom, who had enough of him dirty himself with that black pillow, took it away despite his protest, cleaned his paws with a washcloth and used others to clean his face and hood throughly. She changed his comforter and pillow and threw the dark Rey-pillow onto the floor, like it was nothing. Ben gasped and tried to reach after it, but she held him back and changed him out of the dirty ewok-onsie into normal black pyjamas, which for Ben was a small victory. But he didn't like to sacrifice Rey for his chance to go back to his normal life.
"I will explain everything later about this Rey." said Luke to Leia. "If you behave...we will in fact go and look for her," said his uncle to Ben and hoped that bargain had worked.
"What...really?" Ben looked up from where he had stared at the pillow like it was in mortal danger, on the cold floor.
Luke nodded. "And don't worry, I will protect you out there...that of course, means that you have to obey me in everything. No wandering off on your own. You will follow my path. I'm not losing you...I'm not losing anyone ever again..." he muttered it like a prayer.
"Of course..." said Ben, who knew Luke had lost a lot over the years and looked back at the pillow, pondering over whether to use the force to get it back of the ground and how to do it without his mom finding out.
"I mean it Ben, you will stay at my side at all times...right Leia?" Luke looked at this sister for help.
"Yes," she dove into the Ben-bag. "Or he will put this on you."
What the!
KR: You sure need this...
DO NOT!
"Harness?! Mom!" shouted Ben appalled when she held up a red leash in front of him.
"We are not losing you," said Leia.
"I'm not a toddler," countered Ben.
"Yes a harness...great idea." Luke took the harness from his sister's hand. "Just like when you did wander off in our vacations...especially close to monsters..." He shivered while thinking of all the times he had come close to one, darkside or not.
"Please don't remind me...no monsters." Leia looked sick to the stomach as well and hugged her son closely and glared at imaginary monsters.
"I only did that because you were not paying any attention to me...you and dad were too busy flirting with each other...or fighting...while uncle was blabbering about some old tales of the past, which all of you thought I was listening to..." said Ben, who wasn't as afraid of monster as the siblings. He had to life with one...in his head.
"Ben, that's no excuse," scolded his mother, that he had made such light of their trauma.
"Sorry..." said Ben, though he wasn't really sorry.
"So you will listen to me this time...or..." threatened Luke and shook the harness, like warning bells.
"I promise I will do that. I'm not a toddler anymore. Please don't do that. Please..." pleaded Ben, who thought he wouldn't survive the mortification of being put into one at his age, even though he had already been forced to wear an ewok onesie, but at least it wasn't out in the public. Plus, he was back in his normal pyjamas.
"As long as you keep your promise..." said Luke firmly and put the harness into his pocket.
"I will," said Ben, even though he knew there was no way for him no to try to sneak away and find Rey.
"Try reaching Han again." Leia handed the holoviewer to Luke, which hadn't broken despite her tight grip on it.
"But isn't he banned from coming here...?" Ben looked between the siblings, like they were hiding something from him.
"He won't try to take you away while your mother is here," said Luke as he tried once again to ring his father.
"Take me away...why would he do that...?" Ben looked at his mom.
"You know why. He doesn't want you to be a Jedi," answered his uncle, before his mom could.
"I don't want to be a Jedi," said Ben snidely.
"To bad we don't really have a choice. Your future is shrouded in darkness and we must fight it...together," said Luke dramatically and put the holovier into his pocket, when there was still no reaching Han.
"That sucks..." said Ben and crossed his arms with a frown.
"I know sweetie, I know," Leia stroke his hair that was now flowing freely with no hood, like that would make anything better.
"We will do the best we can," said Luke and his mom nodded and tried to snuggle Wicket into Ben's folded arms, like he could help him with his training against the darkside.
Ben pushed the plushie away. "I don't need Wicket...I have another...erm...it was a person..." He picked up the ruined pillowcase with an apologetic smile. "A she.."
Leia looked for words to not insult Ben's new friend. "She is...pretty. Is she your girlfriend...?" She asked like he was in a pretend game and she was only playing along.
"Rey," replied Ben with all the passion he could muster in his soul.
His mom's brown eyes widened as she took in that new information and she smiled, as she finally got the answer to most of her questions. "Oh, so this is...?"
"Vader," finished Luke darkly and you could have heard a tiny pin drop in the room, until Leia levelled her son with a such a dark look that all the Sith Lords in history, would have turned instantly to the light.
Lukeeeee!
KR: Now we are getting to good stuff...
Stupid Luke! Why must you ruin everything Rey-related?!
KR: Vader, Vader, VADER!
Next up: Darkside family of the past...