thank you to all my reviewers! the feedback and reviews are always appreciated because i love hearing what you guys have to say about anything i wrote about since it helps me as a writer. i'm doing my best to update, and i know it can be incredibly frustrating, so let me just say to all of you who have been sticking by my story, it seriously blows me away, and thank you soooo much! so, here's ch. 36, and find out if it's a happier ending than the last chapter, or if i still chose to go with the sad route...
enjoy =]
Chapter Thirty-Six: Simply Understanding
Finnick POV
Another heave makes my stomach lurch, and I grip the side of the toilet as I throw up again. It's mostly yellow liquid since I've thrown up everything in me except my stomach acids, but even that's starting to empty from my body. A groan escapes my lips echoing into the bowl. It feels like death. Drinking to the point of pretty much self-poisoning. My insides are in excruciating pain, and you can literally feel the poison coursing through your entire body. I don't know how else to explain it. Except that in moments like these, a part of you wishes you were dead so that the agony would stop.
I dry heave for a bit, hoping I'll throw up even more because it brings a temporary relief, but nothing else comes out. Exhausted and a bit shaky, I slump to the floor and lean against the wall. It's too bright in here making my head and eyes hurt, but I don't have the energy to get up and turn the lights off. The bitter taste in my mouth makes my stomach lurch, but it's not strong enough to bring me to the toilet again. I really hate these moments where you know you'll be sick for the next several hours. I'd drink water, but I need to wait at least several minutes since I just drank half a cup and threw it up minutes later. Nothing will stay down, but I need to try and hydrate until I can keep the water down.
The hotel room door opens, closing with too loud of a shut, and I wince. Loud clicking crosses the marble floor, stopping when Cashmere leans against the doorframe. She's looking down at me, literally. "Pathetic." She says flatly—so she's probably looking down at me figuratively too.
"Go away." I mumble/slur.
"I knew you didn't look well." Cashmere comments ignoring me.
She bends down, sending the scent of her perfume into my nostrils, which makes me gag and lean forward for the toilet. There's no dignified way to have alcohol poisoning, so my loud wrenching fills the bathroom as my body shakes. I'm spitting up whatever I can when her hand is suddenly rubbing my back. I can't help but turn my head and look at her in questioning.
"What? I can be nice!" Cashmere snaps annoyed.
Before I can roll my eyes, the dry heaves overcome me, and I basically lean my head into the bowl as if this will somehow help more than if my head was further away. Finally this torture stops a few minutes later, and I just put my arms onto the seat and lean against the toilet. For now, this white porcelain inanimate object is my best friend. My only best friend actually. A fake friend. Literally fake. How sad am I?
Cashmere takes a seat next to me, her legs bent and out to the side since she's wearing a tight dark blue dress. Blonde curls flow over her shoulders spilling down the front and back. Tonight, or early this morning, she's wearing minimal makeup. Only a hint of light pink eye shadow, a thin line of eyeliner, and mascara. Her faint pink lips glisten in the light with a thin sheen of gloss. Light blue eyes focused on me.
I sigh and rest my head on my left arm. "You look nice."
This throws Cashmere off. She purses her lips, accessing if I'm being sarcastic. After a moment, she concludes I'm not. "Thanks." A faint smile. "You look terrible."
I weakly laugh. "I've heard that before."
"Well it's true." Cashmere says not unkindly.
"I'm sure it is." I sigh feeling my stomach churn.
She runs a hand over the fabric of her dress. "Normally you have a lot more self-control when drinking. What's going on?"
I swallow a little bit of bile which has risen up. "Why do you care?"
Cashmere faintly smiles. "I don't know if I do. But we're victors. Plus, it's a bit unnerving to watch you unravel. If you're not doing well, what does that say for the rest of us? You've always been the most composed."
"I don't know about that." I bitterly laugh. "I just hid it well."
"Exactly." She says.
My head throbs when I lift it to prop myself upright. The room isn't spinning, but it seems to be slightly shifting. Is this the life I want? Becoming a drunk like Haymitch and screwing countless girls. I really hate myself—more than I ever have in the past. The disgust and loathing I have is absolutely unbearable. Each day is a struggle, but the only way for me to get through it is by being drunk. And when I'm drunk, I want the comfort of another person. So I sleep with the girls. Here. In Four. I'm a whore.
I run a hand through my tangled hair. "I loss the girl I love." I tell Cashmere. "Nothing seems to matter."
Sadness shows in her eyes. "What happened?"
"I'm not good for her." I reply.
"She's alive?"
"Of course."
Cashmere leans forward and smacks me in the back of the head. "You made it sound like the Capitol killed her. If she's alive, win her back! It's very simple Finnick."
My head is throbbing and I want to strangle Cashmere for sending these new waves of pain throughout my brain. She's a victor, so she can handle herself. But I restrain myself from doing so. "It's not that simple Cashmere." I sneer. "Non-victors aren't allowed to know that we prostitute, so her sister doesn't understand why I sleep around. And Annie can't abandon her sister."
"Annie?" Cashmere quickly asks. Her eyes look upwards to the side, then back at me. "Your tribute who won?"
Right, only Haymitch and Kenin know I love Annie. Uncomfortably I clear my throat. "Don't say anything."
Cashmere laughs in disbelief. "That's the girl you love? The crazy girl who began talking to herself."
"Don't," I breathe very harshly, "call her crazy. She's not. We're all disturbed. Why can't she be more so than others?"
"I'm not saying she can't Finnick." Cashmere says irritably. "But c'mon. It's a bit strange she would talk to herself so publicly. And her breakdowns, I get it, but most of us do that in private."
"She's different. That's all." I defend.
Cashmere shrugs. "I'm not trying to say anything bad. It's just unexpected that she would be the girl you love."
I breathe in. "I love her. And we can't be together. End of story."
Cashmere studies my face. "Why did she volunteer? Does she know you love her?"
"That's why she volunteered. It destroyed her when she saw the screens of my Capitol stays." I rest my hands on my abdomen. "Annie understands now, but Kenin's sister doesn't."
"You're dating his sister?" Cashmere asks incredulously. "Didn't he say you were technically dating his sister? What does that even mean?"
This is a mess. Despite my drunken state, I try to explain it as best I can. "Annie is like family to the Denfezes, Kenin's family. So I was technically dating his sister. Yurol, Kenin's other sister, her boyfriend told them about the screens because Annie and Yurol didn't watch the screens. So when Annie saw me with other girls, it destroyed her. She volunteered, and we got back together because she knew the truth then. But Joln, her ex-boyfriend who volunteered to be with her, got beheaded, and then she lost it. We got back together, but Yurol who doesn't know about the prostitution, was going to leave Annie since Yurol couldn't understand why Annie would want to stay with me when it seems like I'm always cheating on her. Which I am, or was, whatever. So, Annie chose Yurol, and we're not together because Yurol can never know the truth."
The wide-eyed expression on Cashmere's face tells me I may have lost her somewhere along the way of explaining what's happened between Annie and I. Now that I've said it aloud, it does seem rather complex. Finally Cashmere relaxes her face. "It's all mixed up. Everyone involved. This person and that person, but you know what Finnick, the only people who should be involved are you and Annie."
"You don't understand. She can't abandon her family like that." I tell Cashmere.
"No." She snaps. "Yurol, her sister, or whoever, shouldn't be making decisions like this for Annie. She's the one who'd be abandoning Annie since she would leave if Annie stayed with you. That sounds like abandonment to me." Cashmere raises her hand, and emphatically points. "What you and Kenin need to do, is not tell Yurol the truth, but convince her that there are things she can't know for her own safety about how things are done in the Capitol. Which is why you sleep around, but you really do love Annie. And I mean convince her that you really love Annie. And Annie, she knows the truth, so she can agree with you guys that things are different here, so you have to sleep around. Say that it's how you get sponsors, it's how you got people to help Annie, and you can't just throw away another person's life. Not when you knew there was something you could have done about it. So that's why you sleep around. Tell her that. If Kenin and Annie agree with you, Yurol should be more understanding. If she's not, then she's stupid."
Now my eyes are opened wide. I've never heard Cashmere speak so strongly on my behalf. "Why are you trying to help me?"
"I don't know Finnick." Cashmere says with exasperation. "I guess I'm a sucker for people in love. With what we've been through, it's the only thing we have going for us."
I lower my head. "I slept with someone back in Four again. I'm sure they've heard."
A painful smack to my head is Cashmere's response. "Then stop sleeping around and beg for forgiveness! If Annie was with you despite your reputation, I'm sure she'll understand your whorish attitude. It's how we know how to cope. We shouldn't be judged for that."
"Stop smacking my head." I growl when she finishes. Cashmere rolls her eyes, and then I kindly say. "But thanks." She looks back at me. "Why didn't I know what to do?"
"Because you're a guy." Cashmere responds as if this is an obvious answer. "You're clueless." She laughs. "But I'm also an outside party. I have an unbiased perspective. With Gloss, it's not so easy to know what to do when we fight."
"Do you guys fight often?"
She shakes her head. "Not really. It's more of we're angry at the world and take it out on each other. We bicker more than anything. But it does for really good make-up-sex."
We begin laughing. I'm not sure who's more surprised she said that. Cashmere and I have never really been on good terms. But I guess that's starting to change. She came to my room to check on me, and ended up trying to help. Maybe she cares more than she let's on. And honestly, a part of me is starting to care too. Like she said, we're victors. We understand parts of each other's pain.
Cashmere shakes her head, and runs a hand along the bathroom floor tile. It's later into the night or morning, but she's here. Very quietly I ask. "Is Gloss with a client?"
The laughter dies, and I see the sadness. "Yes, he is. I know I do the same thing, but it kills me to know he's with another person. Guy or girl, I don't know. I don't ask. Our love life doesn't include them. So we don't talk about it."
"I'm sorry. I don't know how that feels." I say.
"How does Annie feel about your prostitution?" Cashmere curiously asks.
"Honestly, I think it bothered her, but not as much as it should have. She knows, or knew I love her, so she clung to that. Everything else is what comes with being a victor, and she understood what that meant. I mean, she understood there was a lot of baggage."
Cashmere thinks this over while stretching her legs and back. I'll admit, it is arousing except my body doesn't respond that way to anyone else now. She tilts her neck from side to side with faint cracks. "Maybe Gloss and I have something to learn from Annie. We know we love each other, we're both victors, and the prostitution doesn't mean anything to us. The people we sleep with don't matter, it's like you said, it's part of our baggage. We should let that part go. Not dwell on it. Know it, but not think much of it."
"I'm sure it isn't easy." I softly say.
"It isn't." Cashmere agrees. "But the Capitol people aren't worth our concern either."
"No." I respond. "No they're not."
I'm exhausted from all this talk. After continuously throwing up, even talking takes a lot of exertion. I rest against the toilet, and lean over again as I dry heave and spit out whatever I can. Cashmere gives a loud sigh before leaning forward to rub my back.
"Get up!" Someone roughly tells me while pulling the pillow out from beneath my head.
I'm staring at Kenin who has my pillow in his hand. A bit unsteadily, I sit up, wincing as my head throbs. "What's your problem?" I snap.
"Nothing." He snaps back. "It's past noon. We're leaving in an hour."
I snatch the pillow from his hand, and position it beneath my head again. "Then wake me up when we're actually leaving."
My eyes are closed when the pillow is abruptly yanked out from beneath, and my head falls to the couch cushion. This time Kenin is glaring at me. He holds my stare before throwing the pillow at my face. "I thought you loved Annie!"
The pillow hits the floor as I sit up and grip the cushions. "I do!"
"Then why are you sleeping around here for fun?" Kenin accuses in a loud voice.
I'm breathing heavily since I'm still hungover, my sleep has been interrupted, and because I hate myself. Kenin's party was only a few days ago, so there was no time for him to know I slept with someone else in Four if he didn't know when we came to the Capitol. So of course my newfound decision to sleep around here has come as a shock to him. He can tell the difference between my clients, stirring up the media, and being a whore.
Very softly, I answer. "I slept with someone after your party."
"What?" Kenin quietly breathes. He takes a seat on the table in front of me.
"I was so drunk, and at the time it seemed like a good idea. After, it was already done." I put my head in my hands. "They'll eventually hear about it, and it didn't seem like it would matter anymore. So yeah, I've been sleeping around here too."
There's a loud exasperated sigh. "Finnick…"
I raise my head. "Look, I know. It's bad. I've really screwed things up."
"Why do things keep getting more complicated?" Kenin asks aloud—not really to anyone in particular. "You and Annie are perfect together."
A bitter laugh escapes my lips. "Perfect? I don't think so. Everything I've done keeps screwing up her life. Before me, was her life this hard?" Kenin doesn't say anything, and I give another bitter laugh. "I thought so."
Kenin chews on his pinky nail for a few seconds. Then he looks up at me. "Her life has always been hard Finnick. Did things get a bit crazy when you two became involved? Sure. Maybe more so than most, but you both have very different circumstances compared to the regular person also. What you should be asking yourself is: Did you make Annie the happiest she's ever been in her life? Definitely."
"I've also made her the saddest she's ever been."
Before I can react, Kenin has reached out and smacked the side of my head. "That's only because of the mandatory secrecy. I'm talking about when it's only you two and nobody else is involved. The way you treat her, it's good for her."
With feigned disdain, I rub the side of my head. "You and Cashmere need to learn proper manners. It's not okay to go around smacking people." Kenin simply grins, and now I smile. "And thanks. I'll try to remember that. Do you think there's any way we could talk to Yurol and convince her to back off about me being with Annie? I talked to Cashmere about me telling Yurol it's how I get my tributes the sponsors they need, but I can't say if that will be enough."
A hint of mischief is in Kenin's eyes. "Well, I'm sure between the two of us we can figure something out."
Annie POV
When you're in so much pain that it feels impossible to do anything with your life—it's the worse feeling in the world. I've felt this debilitating pain when I saw Finnick on the screens with that girl, and every moment which followed from then. But now this is a different pain. I mean, how many ways can a person hurt with the same level of severity? You would think the pain wouldn't have so many endless forms.
I'm supposed to be out in the front, and I can feel Lance and Binsen watching me although my back is turned to them, but I just need a second to gather myself. Just a second… My hands grip the metal sink as I lower my head and inhale slowly. It's my first day back at the Shack because I can't stand to be cooped up in the house any longer. It's become unbearable. All of it has. I know Yurol and Joa are trying to be here for me. But a part of them doesn't understand and it makes me feel just so incredibly alone. There is no one for me to turn to. Nobody who can understand this utter defeat.
I breathe in again and straighten myself. It's time I went to the front. When I turn around, Lance and Binsen are focused on their work—scaling fish, boiling mussels, stirring a pot—but I know they're doing everything to look anywhere but here. I don't even bother to smile because they have too much respect to look up at me and see the great sadness which must be on my face. I'm grateful for this feigned ignorance.
In the front, a few tables are filled. One couple, and a group of girls. The girls are talking and as I approach, I catch their conversation.
"—definitely available again. He slept with my friend's friend."
"Really?" A brunette asks.
"Yeah, during Kenin's party, Finnick left with her. My friend said that her friend said that they slept together. So that means he's back on the market. Why are you looking at me like that?"
Her friend's eyes flicker to me, and the speaker turns around to look at me. All of the girls are staring, and I can see the shock in their eyes. Because what is the girl who went crazy doing here? How did I, the crazy girl, ever manage to land Finnick for a prolonged period of time when he has the habitual tendency to leave? Am I really that surprised he wasn't faithful to me the entire time because how could I have not seen what was going on in the screens? Did I really think I was so special just because Finnick stayed with me rather than leaving immediately afterwards?
One of the girls finally breaks the silence and remarks. "Well, it was going to happen sooner or later."
I'm walking out of the Shack before any of them can say something else. Because I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear how I'm the crazy girl and feel their whispers behind my ears. I don't want to hear any comments about Finnick from girls who don't know him like how I do. I don't want to hear how he slept around because nobody forced his hand this time. He did it out of absolute free will. And I understand it's how he copes. He loves me, yes, and it's how he deals with our situation. But it doesn't mean I want to hear it.
Though my eyes don't wander from looking straight ahead as I walk the road towards the beach, I see the glances from the people around me. Their covered whispers and wide eyes. It's one of the rare times people have seen me outside ever since I returned to Four in a state of madness. There goes the girl who volunteered because she believed Finnick was faithful. There goes the girl whose ex-boyfriend volunteered to be with her and he got beheaded. There goes the girl who began talking to herself while she hid in a tree. There goes the girl who nearly let herself starve to death. There goes the girl. There goes the girl. There goes the girl. Isn't it just sad? Isn't she so pathetic? I feel awful for her. Poor thing, it must be so hard.
I hate their pity.
I'm not as strong as the other victors so I don't hide the crazy as well as they do. But for what I've been through, shouldn't I be allowed to be crazy? Shouldn't I be allowed to be a little different without being called crazy? And even if I am crazy, it's only because I'm weaker. Aren't I allowed to be weak? My soul simply cannot handle a lot of stress. That's all there is to it. But they don't give me this courtesy.
The sandy gravel drags beneath my feet, and gust of salty air blows the hair from my face. It's bright so I have to squint a bit, but I know where I'm heading. I can almost see every track I've ever made along the way to this route. The occasional flowers that sprout along the strips of grass. All the unmoving rocks which have remained in the same place for countless years. It all looks the same, but with the effects of time the slight changes are here, only not evident.
From the edge of the cliff where I take a seat, I see all the boats. Same boats, different locations. Same ocean, different waves. I don't want to be here anymore. Maybe if I were somewhere else, I'd have a chance at starting a new life without Finnick. But here, it's impossible. Everything reminds me of him, and how can you escape that sort of influence? If you stay in the same place, starting over is nearly impossible. To change, you need at least some kind of change to happen. I think so.
A young woman, with black hair and sad green eyes, takes a seat next to me. "What happened in the Shack?"
"I found out Finnick slept with somebody after Kenin's party." I reply as I stare out at the ocean's horizon.
"That surprises you?" Yurol asks as gently as she can.
I take her hand in mine and give it a squeeze. "Yurol, humor me and think about it. When was the last time you heard about Finnick sleeping with another girl in Four when he and I became involved?"
She turns to me. "Why are you asking this?"
"Just think about it, Yurol. Please." I say.
Yurol sighs and stares at the horizon. I can feel her thoroughly sorting through her memories for any indications that Finnick slept around in Four when we were together. Finally she responds. "Honestly, I can't. It was all before you and him."
I nod. "Exactly. It was only in the Capitol."
She shakes her head. "I know you love him, but the rules don't just change to make it okay that he cheats on you there."
"But they do." I softly whisper. "I'm not trying to fight, but you even asked me yourself about what's changed since the first time I saw Finnick on the screens with that girl until now. Isn't it possible that after being reaped I learned some things which caused me to change my mind? Isn't it possible that there are different rules there than here?"
"Like what?" Yurol asks desperately trying to understand. "What can possibly make being unfaithful, okay?"
It's a great risk, but I'm so tired of not having Finnick with me when we should be together. In the thin layer of sand and rocks, I write.
Capitol ears here. F = prostitute.
Yurol's eyes widen, and I raise a finger to my lips. I point to her, then make a slitting action across my throat, and raise a finger to my lips again.
Very casually I say. "For my sake, can't you just trust that Finnick and I love each other and there has to be a very good reason why I would stay with him when he sleeps around only in the Capitol."
The expression on Yurol's face tells me that she's trying to keep her voice steady. "Maybe. But why did he sleep around here now?"
"Because, it's how most of the victors deal with their pain. Finnick slept around before we got together, he's doing it again now. It doesn't mean he doesn't love me. It just means that he's lonely." I tell her. Hopefully this will be good enough reason for her.
Yurol silently sheds a tear. "I love you, you know? I'm only trying to look out for you. It's all I've been trying to do. If you really believe he loves you, I'll trust you."
"Thank you." I whisper and my heart feels a little bit lighter. Maybe I could have tried to tell her this entire time. But I feel like all the other times would have been the wrong time. Emotions were too high and there was too much going on. Now was the right time. I only hope Finnick will want to be with me.
With a shaky finger, Yurol wipes out the F and replaces it with a K. Her eyebrows rise as the question. I see the fear and dread in her eyes as she waits for my answer. And she begins to silently cry harder as I give a small nod. I hold Yurol in my arms as we stare out to the horizon and let the tears fall.
I'm waiting on Finnick's porch because he and Kenin will be back any minute. There is something I want to know, and I think I know Finnick well enough to predict how he will respond, but I have to be sure. Maybe it's an unrealistic expectation, but we're both victors so there's no longer any need for secrecy. And what I want to know doesn't require that I be a victor.
Two figures enter the neighborhood and I immediately turn my head in their direction. By their gait, I instantly know it's my beautiful boy and Kenin. They're talking to each other, occasionally laughing. It's good to see Finnick smiling. I'm glad Kenin's been his friend through this entire ordeal. Finnick is saying something, and he glances in my direction, then back at Kenin, and then his head almost snaps to his porch. He stops walking, and stares at me. Kenin follows his gaze, and I see the quizzical expression form in his eyebrows.
At Kenin's urging, Finnick slowly begins to walk again, and then he begins to jog. In moments, he's running up to his porch stairs and is standing before me on the ground while I stand on the second porch stair. "Annie, is everything alright? What are you doing here?"
I look over my beautiful boy. The unruly bronze hair, golden skin, thick muscles, black shirt, dark brown pants, piercing sea green eyes, full lips. His chest falls and rises as he waits for me to say something. Always waiting. So patiently. Never rushing me in any way. We're about the same height since I'm on the second stair. I see the tendons in his neck, and I tentavily reach out to trace them.
My fingers spread apart as I move my hands downwards; my thumbs are resting on Finnick's clavicles while my other fingers wrap around the inner area of his shoulders. Very quietly, I say. "I love you."
The shock on Finnick's face fills me with confidence because it tells me I still have this effect on him. Before he can say anything, I lean forward and softly press my lips to his. His body instantly tenses, and I don't move so I can give Finnick time to comprehend what I am doing. It takes but a few seconds until his arms are around my body pulling me closer. My hands move to his hair, and I let our lips flow in a synchronized rhythm that we both know so well. The soft flesh of my lips are extremely sensitive allowing me to feel the deepness of our kiss. The tenderness and passion. The ache and the healing. It's been too long since we've both had a kiss like this.
Desperately, Finnick holds onto the kiss before pulling away and putting his forehead to mine. He whispers in a tormented voice. "This isn't right. What about Yurol?"
I stroke his jaw with my thumb. "I talked to her. Convinced her things are different in the Capitol. She's backing off." Silently I mouth, prostitution, so he knows I actually told Yurol the truth.
Finnick's jaw tightens as he fights an internal debate. His mouth wins. "I've been sleeping around."
"I know." I softly reply.
He shakes his forehead, rolling it across mine. "You don't understand. Not just in the Capitol. But in Four. During Kenin's party, I left with a girl and we had sex." Finnick lets out a sigh, and he pulls his head back. There's tears in his eyes. "I'm so sorry Annie. It's not an excuse, but I was so drunk, and it shouldn't have happened, but I did it. And then I did it more in the Capitol. You deserve to know this. I am so sorry."
I take Finnick's sad face in my hands. "Finnick, I know about the girl in Four. And if you slept with more people in the Capitol, so what? I'm not saying I'm happy, but I get it. I understand you. Whatever helps you cope, right? It helped you cope, but now you know I'm here. We're here. So, so what?"
Finnick bites his lower lip, and presses his forehead to mine. "I love you so much."
"I love you too." I whisper back.
Finnick's hand grips mine squeezing it with such intensity that my hand begins to ache. But I don't care, he's mine, we're together, that's all I care about. My back arches as my wrapped legs pull Finnick in, and an unsuppressed moan flows from my vocal chords. Several shorter cries follow, and I grip Finnick's slippery hand. His slick biceps shine in the sunlight, and I can see the beads of sweat clinging to Finnick's skin. His bronze hair is slightly darker and damp, and he strokes my cheek with his other hand.
I can feel the sweat between our touching chests, and Finnick's heart is racing. Mines must be too because I can feel it pounding against my ribcage. He's being very gentle and careful to shift most of his weight onto the bed since my body frame is still rather frail. Honestly, it kind of hurts because my body is still recovering from the malnutrition, and my bones are digging into Finnick, but the pleasure overwhelms the pain. The pain is tolerable, and the pleasure is desirable. But I'm glad he's taken into consideration my physical health.
My wrist gives a soft pop, and Finnick instantly raises his head to look at our entwined hands. He releases our hands, and presses his into the bed. I raise my freed hand to Finnick's face. "I'm fine Finnick." I heavily breathe. "Better even. Don't worry."
His sea green eyes never leave my face. "Are you sure?"
"I'm sure." I whisper.
Finnick puts his forearm on the bed and lowers his body. My eyes close as he presses his lips to mine, and I let the feel consume me. He's everywhere. Around me, in me, deep in my muscles, all the way down to my toes and all the way up to my fingertips. My head is flooded with euphoria and I feel like I'm floating in the air without the laws of gravity. It's out of this world. Lost so deep in this state of mind, I don't know where or how to come down.
The intensity increases and Finnick presses his face to my chest as he lets out a loud groan, and I hold my hands to the back of his neck. We both finish at the same time, and hold onto to each other as our hearts beat so quickly it's near impossible to catch our breath. I'm inhaling a lungful of air, one after the other, while Finnick's breathing hisses between his clenched teeth. I stroke my fingers along his back, and I feel his fingers at the base of my throat.
Eventually our breathing slows, and I lie on the bed with Finnick on top of me. Every inch of me aches, in a good way, and I feel myself slowly coming down from the gravity-free zone. Finnick kisses my throat, and rolls onto his right side to relieve his weight, so I roll onto my side to look at him. He holds me close, his left arm around my side.
Finnick leans up to kiss my forehead. "I can't believe you're here."
I just smile because I know there's more he wants to say.
He pushes my damp hair to the side of my face. "This has to be it. We're finally together again. I'll never do anything to separate us."
"I hope not." I whisper. "I always want to be with you."
"I love you Annie Cresta." Finnick adamantly says. "I'm never leaving you."
A part of me wants to whisper, Never say never. But that's just bad luck, isn't it? Or is it the: saying never part? It doesn't matter because for now, I'm here with Finnick Odair. "I'll never leave you Finnick. Never again. I love you."
I gently kiss him on the lips, and I run my fingers along his back. Finnick kisses me, letting his hands wander over my body. When his hands press against my hipbone, I slightly wince since the adrenaline has worn off. He pulls back and looks me in the eye. "Are you hurt?"
"It's fine." I tell him. "I just need to gain more weight."
Finnick grins and kisses my nose. "Then let's get started on that." He sits up, and pulls me upright too. "I'm famished, are you?"
I grin and roll my eyes. "Way to kill the moment."
He gives a hearty laugh and wraps his arms around me. "You know you love me anyways." Finnick presses his face into my neck causing us to fall back onto the bed. I'm laughing as Finnick plants kisses all over my face and upper torso. "We should really eat, or we never will. I'll just stay in bed with you all day."
"That doesn't sound so bad." I giddily comment.
"It doesn't." Finnick breathes into my throat. And then he's sitting upright again, pulling me with him. "But after we eat. After all, I am somewhat of a chef myself."
"Fine." I surrender. "Let's cook and eat."
I get off the bed, and begin walking out the door when Finnick calls. "Annie."
I turn around. "Yeah?"
He holds up my shirt and pants. "Don't you want your clothes?"
"Nope." I simply say and turn to walk down the stairs, but not before seeing the semi-shocked expression on Finnick's face. I hear him get off the bed, and run down the stairs until his arms are around me, and he forces me to walk in an awkward position as he puts his weight behind me.
Finnick kisses my shoulder, and let's me go since I'm somewhat stumbling. He takes my hand as we walk into the kitchen. "I've never walked around naked with someone so blatantly before."
I kiss his triceps. "It's nice."
"Yes it is." He grins opening the fridge door. "We should do this more often."
"Having sex?" I ask.
"Making love." Finnick corrects with a smile. "And yes, that too. But I was actually talking about cooking naked." He raises an eyebrow. "You're rather aggressive aren't you?"
His comment makes me blush. "I am not."
Finnick leans down and kisses me. "I'm teasing. Either way, I love you."
I blink and put my hands to his chest. "I love you too."
We stare into each other's eyes, and I can feel Finnick's heartbeat increase. Finally he groans and kisses me cheek. "Stop trying to seduce me, I'm serious about cooking us some food so we can eat."
"Fine." I say with feigned exasperation. "Cook us some food."
I know a part of Finnick wants me to know he's not only interested in sex or making love—his history will always have some underlying insecurity about me believing he loves me—but a part of him is also worried about the substantial amount of weight I've loss, and haven't quite begun to put back on. I mean, I've been eating, I just haven't been hungry since I got better. But things are different now. I should have more of an appetite.
Finnick takes out some fish, mussels, seaweed, shrimp, crab, squid, vegetables, and a bunch of other things. He sets them on the island counter, and grabs a pan from beneath the sink. "I will be making a sautéed seafood dish. Not much fat so it'll be easy on your stomach, but enough food to start plumping you up."
"You make it sound so attractive." I laugh.
He sets the pan on the warming stove and comes back over to me. "You're beautiful. I'm concerned about your health."
I run my fingers across his hard abdomen. "I know. And I appreciate it."
Finnick just smiles and kisses the side of my head. "You're always beautiful. And I love kissing you everywhere."
"Why Finnick," I tease as he opens up containers and unwraps some of the food, "you're quite the flirt."
"Only to you." He winks and tosses some vegetables into the pan.
Finnick grabs a bottle of dark brown sauce, and pours it into the pan temporarily muting the sizzling noise. He puts in the fish, mussels, squid, and whatever else. Soon the sizzling noise returns, and I watch the smoke begin to rise from the pan. Overhead, Finnick pushes a button and the stove fan comes on clearing some of the smoke. The smell is incredible, and my mouth begins to salivate. I can almost taste the different flavors within the dish he's creating. Then suddenly, Finnick jumps back slightly knocking the pan to the side.
He jumps back again, and grabs a tiny dishrag. "Maybe cooking naked isn't the smartest idea."
I begin to laugh because I understand what we didn't think through. He has very little protection from the sizzling splatters. I walk over to Finnick's side and see that he's covering his groin with the tiny rag. "Nice. Covering the most important part of your body?"
"It is important." Finnick playfully defends. "You'll agree if I can't use it."
I whack his arm and laugh. "You would say something like that."
"Yes I would." He grins back. Then he winces and jerks his arm back. "This was a terrible idea."
"It was your idea." I tell him.
There's a small pop and Finnick rubs his chest letting the rag fall since he stirring the food with his other hand. "Can you do me a favor and get me a towel or something? I'm not too keen on getting scalded to death."
I pick up the rag and hold it over his groin. "Gotta protect the area I like." I tease. Finnick smiles, and holds the rag up again. I back away to look in his downstairs closet. "I'll get you a towel."
"Thanks." He says.
"Of course."
I exit the kitchen and head towards Finnick's closet beneath the stairs. Inside are several blankets, but no towels. The towels are probably upstairs in his bathroom closet. I grab a thick blanket and close the door. The fabric feels nice against my bare skin. I let it drag against the floor as I walk the few feet between me and the kitchen. Right now, I'm the happiest I've been in awhile. Since my games.
Annie. A voice whispers from upstairs.
I drop the blanket in front of the kitchen. Finnick is focused on stirring the pan so it couldn't have been him. Then who was it? I look at the blanket lying on the floor, and see the several folds of fabric. I'm frozen and can't say anything. The white marble with colorful swirls in it are beneath the blanket. The blanket is a dark blue with no embroidery. I am standing in Finnick's house. The house he won from his game. I won a house from my game.
Annie.
Immediately I turn on my heels and bolt up the stairs. I look in the bathroom but no one is in there. Who is here?
It's me Annie.
I cut off his head and hid it somewhere. A girly voice laughs. You'll never find it because it washed away in the flood when I threw it at you.
The voices are coming from Finnick's room! I run into his room and throw the door open. It's empty. His sheets are ruffled just the way we left them. Pillows on the floor. Sunlight flooding through the window. Nothing on his dresser. My naked almost skeleton of a body reflected in the mirror. They were in here, I know it.
So this is how you survived? A guy's voice snarls. You screwed your way into survival. I should have been victor. If Finnick hadn't gotten them to flood the arena, I wouldn't have drowned and I would have won! Did you forget how he tried to drown you? He tried to kill you!
"No." I whisper. "No, he loves me. He knew I wouldn't let myself drown. Finnick wouldn't try to kill me."
Oh but he did. A girl's voice cackles like fire. How could he have been sure you wouldn't drown? He wanted you to die!
Emerald's voice begins to sing a terrible taunt.
Where did his head go?
This you will never know
Let me tell you a secret
Only if you promise to keep it
It's locked away
That is where it will stay
Hidden from sight
Find it if you might
Is it in the drawer?
Or behind the door?
I cut of his head
Hid it beneath the bed
I drop to all fours and look beneath the bed, but there's nothing there. I scramble to the door and close it, but there's nothing there either. There's only one other place to look that the song told me, so I begin to rapidly look through Finnick's drawers. Shirts. Pants. Boxers. Socks. More shirts! Pants! Shirts again! Where is Joln's head!
Finnick POV
There's a scuffling noise in my room, and what I think is the sound of drawers rapidly opening and closing. Annie had been awhile in getting me a towel, and when I saw the blanket on the floor, I immediately knew something was wrong. I'd stopped what I was doing, ran up the stairs, and am now opening the door to my bedroom. Annie jumps in terror when I step into the room, and there's a beyond frightened look screaming in her eyes.
"It's in here somewhere!" She nearly screams. "I know it is!" Annie yanks open another drawer holding my ties, and slams it shut. She opens the bottom drawer beneath, and finds a few of my most valuable pocessions. Right before she slams the drawer shut, Annie looks in it again, and stops moving. "It has to be in here. But this is the last drawer. And, and, what is all this?"
Very calmly, I walk over to Annie and crouch down, putting an arm around her shaking body. "These are the few personal things I have." I gently put my hand beneath her chin, and force her to look at me. "What are you looking for?"
She begins to sob, crumpling to the floor, not bothering to sit upright. "Joln's head. They told me it was in here. Why am I hearing these voices Finnick?" I take a seat, and run my hand over her side feeling each rib beneath—my attempt to soothe her. Annie reaches up, and grips my hand. Her voice is barely a whisper. "Did you try to kill me? That's what they said. And I told them you loved me, but they're confusing me."
"No." I fiercely whisper. "I would never have told them to flood the arena if I didn't think you could win. I do love you Annie."
"I knew it." She whispers back staring at my opened drawer. "They were wrong. Everyone was."
I lie down next to her, and put my face in front of hers. "Annie, look at me." Her eyes flicker to mine. "They're not real. It's in your head. It happens to all of us. But this is real. Us. Not them."
Annie begins to furiously nod as tears drip sideways off the bridge of her nose. "Okay. Okay." She touches my face with her hand. "You're real. They're not. You love me. And I love you."
"Yes." I softly say.
Her eyes close as more tears spill from her shut eyes, and all I can do is lie next to Annie with my arms around her. She breathes in with that wet congested sound, and gently exhales from her lips. Little by little the shaking stops, but her eyes open in terror when a loud beeping begins to echo throughout my house. I put my hand to her face. "It's only the alarm. I need to get the food off the stove. I'll be right back. Okay? You're safe, I promise."
Annie frantically searches my face, and then nods in belief. I lean over and kiss her cheek. This seems to calm her, but she doesn't respond or move. I get to my feet, and pull my sheet off the bed to drape it over her body. There's a pillow next to Annie's head, so I pull it her way, and she lifts her head onto it. Then I'm out of the room, running down the stairs and into my kitchen. It's extremely smoky in here, so I open the windows and dump the pan in the sink. For a moment the smoke is amplified by the water I turn on, but as I wave around the blanket the smoke slowly dissipates out the window. Finally my fire alarm goes off, and I rush back up the stairs.
I find Annie sitting upright, the bed sheet wrapped around her shoulders. She's leaning over my drawer and looking at the contents inside. It's not that I mind her looking, everything I have is hers, but I feel a pang of something because I feel extremely vulnerable. There isn't much inside: an old, dried teabag; broken shards of glass and a small boat mast; a black journal; and a piece of rope. Trash to any other person, but remnants of what's been important in my life.
Only when I take a seat next to Annie, does she turn to me. "What is this?"
"My pocessions." I reply.
"I know, you said that." Annie says turning back to the drawer. "But what are they?"
I put a hand on her thigh and look inside too. The tea bag is yellow and well aged. The broken shards of glass are pushed to the corner with the boat mast lying on top. The journal is in the bottom left corner, no longer collecting dust. And the rope is lying next to the tea bag in the center. I see these things nearly every day, but their importance is still as strong as ever.
I kiss Annie's shoulder through the sheet before explaining. "When I crawled to Mags' home after being driven mad from the voices, she made me a cup of tea. She sat with me all night, and I remember gripping the cup as if it was some kind of lifesaver. It was the only thing I had to hold onto. It was the first thing anyone had made for me. So I took the bag and kept it."
Annie smiles, and points to the rope. "And that?"
A bit uncomfortably I clear my throat. "Let me start off and say, I know it's a bit morbid. It's the rope Kenin used to trick Sally into taking the wrong bag. And I know it caused a person's death, my own girl tribute, but Kenin kept it. He pretended that it was his token from home, and it helped him win. After everything it did for him, he couldn't part with it. But eventually it became too much, all the memories, and knowing that it's how he was able to kill Sally. So he gave it to me. He told me, he couldn't throw it away, so he wanted me to have it and I could decide what to do with it. I'm only keeping it because it's an object that Kenin gave to me."
"I understand." Annie softly comments and she kisses my bare shoulder. "What's the journal?"
"It's the only thing I had before the community homes. Which means it came from my actual home. I have nothing else from that life." I say.
Annie looks at the broken glass and small mast, then looks at it again. Her voice hitches. "Is that?"
I nod. "It is."
"How did you get it?" She breathes.
"Remember, I had Yurol give me the broken shards she got from my back." I tell Annie. "I tried to look for the rest, but somebody had swept it up and I couldn't find where they disposed of it. I think I found the mast, at least it was where the glass bottle broke. So I'm assuming it is the boat's mast. I'm not really sure though, to be honest."
Annie turns to me with a forming smile. "I can't believe you kept the broken pieces."
I smile and kiss her forehead. "It's not the whole bottle or boat, but it's parts of it. And for me, that's better than nothing. It's the first real gift I ever received. I couldn't let it go so easily."
She smiles and briefly presses her lips to mine. "I'm touched you kept it after all this time."
"I had to. You're the only girl I've ever loved." I tell her.
The sheet falls from Annie's shoulders as she gets to her feet, bends down to kiss me one more time, and then helps me up. She looks at our reflection in the mirror, and I do too. Next to me, Annie's body looks painfully skinny. Faint bruises are appearing on my skin from where her bones dug into me. Her hands trace the bruises and she laughs. "Who would have thought I'd be the one to give you bruises?"
I laugh and continue looking at our reflection. "We'll work on changing that."
Her head turns, so I look back down at her. Annie presses her hands to my chest. "I ruined our food, didn't I?"
I shrug. "Don't worry. We can go out to eat. If you want."
Very innocently, but so damn seductively, Annie kisses my right pectoral. "We can eat out. It'll be nice to walk around. I've been inside homes for too long anyways."
"Then we should put some clothes on. As much as I would love to walk around naked with you, I think that's best done in the privacy of my home." I tell her.
"Too bad." Annie mutters with a smile.
She kisses my chest again, which obviously doesn't help me control my body, so then Annie eyes me suggestively when there's a slight amount of activity. I shake my head. "This, right here, is your fault. But, I am still intent on getting some food into our system."
Annie just laughs and begins pulling on her underwear. "I know, I think I need some food before any other strenuous exercise. I'm rather famished myself now." As if on cue, her stomach begins to growl, and she bursts out laughing. "See?"
I grin and pull on my boxers. "We definitely need to eat."
She pulls on some flowy pants and tightens the string, and pulls on her shirt with no bra. I can't help but raise an eyebrow. Annie blushes. "What? You didn't realize I wasn't wearing a bra before?"
"Well now that I think about it. I know you didn't before bed, but I didn't realize it was a daily thing now." I admit.
"C'mon Finnick." Annie says. "I'm still as flat as a wall. There's hardly anything there."
I pull my shirt over my head, and pull her close to me. "You're still beautiful. And I love you the way you are."
"Yet you're trying to make me gain weight?" She teases, and before I can protest, Annie simply kisses me. "I'm kidding. I know it's a health issue. The bonus is I'll have more breasts when I gain weight. Hopefully."
"Honestly," I tell her, "if they came back or not, it wouldn't matter to me."
Annie smiles. "Almost corny because it's so sweet, but it's still sweet nevertheless."
I laugh and put an arm around her so we can begin walking out of my room and down the stairs. "I'm glad you think so."
Annie POV
Braless, and with Finnick by my side, I walk down his front porch and onto the road. We're passing Kenin's house when the front door opens and Yurol steps out. For a moment, it seems like she's going to turn back and go inside as if that'll erase the fact we've seen her, but then she decides against it and closes the door behind her. We've stopped in front of the porch, and Yurol walks down.
She's not looking at us, but she finally raises her eyes. "Are you guys heading out?"
"Yeah." I say. "I made Finnick burn our lunch."
"I know. I was drinking some water when I saw him waving around a blanket while in the nude." Yurol almost playfully comments.
Finnick coughs and tightens his grip around me. I laugh. "We should probably close the windows or something."
"Probably." Yurol says.
"We probably won't." I honestly reply.
Yurol laughs and just shakes her head. "If I see you two in the window, I'll look away then."
I grin. "Good choice."
She does everything but look at Finnick, and the following silence becomes a bit awkward. Finally Yurol asks. "Can I walk with you guys? I'm going to the market to get food."
And as usual, I'm reminded of why I love Finnick because he responds. "Of course. Maybe it would be a good idea if we all get food from there. Have you eaten yet?"
"No." Yurol shakes her head. "I haven't."
"Alright then, let's head that way." Finnick cheerfully says breaking the tension.
"Finnick," Yurol interjects, "I'm trusting Annie that things are different in the Capitol. So as long as she's happy, that's all I care about." Silently she mouths—with a great amount of guilt and shame in her eyes: I am so sorry.
She audibly said what we've been saying aloud, that things are different and she believes me, but now Yurol is telling Finnick she knows the truth about his prostitution. And he knows I told her about it. I feel Finnick slightly tense in surprise at Yurol's sincere apology, and he holds her gaze. He nods in acceptance, and then says aloud. "That's all I've always cared about too."
Yurol faintly smiles and nods. "I understand." She inhales. "Should we get going?"
My stomach growls. "I think so."
We all begin to laugh and head out of the Victors' Village. I've gotten so used to the stares from people that I hardly notice it while I talk with Yurol. "Have you seen Cameron since you guys broke up?"
"No." She softly replies. "It's been almost three months."
"You didn't really break up with him because he told us about the screens, did you?" I ask.
Yurol shakes her head. "I lied."
I take her hand. "Why?"
"Because if you'd died in your game, I don't know what I would have done. Of course I would have lived for Kenin and Joa, but I couldn't do it for anyone else. Not even for him. I wouldn't be able to deal with having him there while I mourned." Yurol tells me. "And if you won, which you did, I wanted to be there for you every moment. Considering what you were going through, and were going to go through, I knew you would need someone there. I couldn't have him in my life either way. So on the second day of your game, I lied to him, and he left."
"I'm so sorry Yurol." I softly say.
She shakes her head and fiercely holds my gaze. "You don't get to be sorry. It was my decision, and I stand by it. You're my sister, I would do anything for you."
I sigh and look at the surrounding shops. "I've been so selfish."
"No, you were staying away from Finnick because you thought I'd leave you. You were doing anything for me too. Even if it meant not being with him." Yurol replies. "It's not something easily done."
Finnick tenses and I know he hasn't thought about the fact that I chose Yurol over him until now. He understands it, but not entirely. When we're alone, I'll bring this up. I look at the window of a fabric store and see beautiful drapes hanging in the windows. Next to the fabric store, is the Sweet Shop, and grimy handprints and smudges spot the window from where little kids have pressed their hands and faces into the glass. These shops line a gravel road—the main path in town. It feels like I've walked this way so few times compared to my previous daily routines.
I squeeze Finnick's hand and tell Yurol. "You should talk to Cameron. Tell him the truth."
She shrugs. "I'm not sure if it would do any good. We're over."
Unexpectedly, Finnick speaks up. "So were we, but you know, the truth is a powerful thing. Annie lied to me and told me she blamed me for uh," he stumbles on his words and looks at me because I know what he's going to say, and I give him a nod to continue, "for what happened to Joln. But it was because she didn't want me to help her while she got better. Not a good excuse because I always wanted to be there for her," Finnick teases and kisses the side of my head, "but I understood her reason. Cameron loved you, you should at least give him the chance to understand."
Yurol just raises her eyebrows and smiles. "When did you become so smart at relationships?"
"Ah, there's the venom again." Finnick jokes. "I love being insulted. But to answer your question, you can thank Annie. She makes me a better person."
"Corny." Yurol sarcastically says with a smirk.
"Right?" I laugh. "I was just thinking the same thing."
We burst out laughing and Finnick pretends to pout. "Fine, whatever. I won't help anymore, see if I care." This makes us laugh harder and eventually Finnick surrenders and joins in. "I'll never catch a break with either of you."
Yurol agrees with Finnick for once. "You're absolutely right."
We arrive at the market shortly later, and right when we get there Finnick takes off. "I need to check on something…"
He disappears in the crowd of people, and Yurol turns to me. "Why did that sound like a horribly disguised lie?"
I move to the side and stand next to a stall selling dried starfish. "Because he didn't try to hide it. Finnick probably has something he doesn't want to show us until later."
"I trust him." Yurol says looking over an orange starfish. She looks at the vendor and blatantly says. "These are disgusting."
The vendor shoots us death stares so we move away and wander around. I stop at a stall selling pieces of sea glass. There's an assortment of colors, good for making jewelry or art projects. I turn a smooth, pink shard over in my hands. "Are you going to talk to Cameron? I think you should."
Yurol is at the next stall with paper-sea-animal lights laid out on the typical wooden planks which are placed on top of a huge wooden box. She runs a finger over a seahorse light. "I broke his heart Annie. He was so patient, and afraid that if we made love, he wouldn't be able to stand the thought of losing me. And he did. I pushed him away."
"Wait, you guys had sex?" I whisper. But I see the vendor of the lights listening, and I can't help but remark. "Pervert." He shrugs and we move away once again. Now we're standing next to decorated seashells. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"Annie," Yurol sadly smiles, "this was after the Victory Tour when you saw Finnick on the screens. How could I have told you? I know you love me, but I think it would have only made you sadder. You were barely talking to anyone, it didn't feel right to tell you that."
"I didn't even think about you." I softly say. "I am so sorry."
In her very sisterly voice, Yurol shakes her head. "You've had a lot going on. You were dealing with things the best you could, I understand. Stop apologizing, it just makes me feel worse. I was so adamant about you not being with Finnick, I didn't even stop to consider your happiness."
I shrug and look around. "There's a lot going on everywhere."
"Yes there is." Yurol agrees. The market is rather busy, and several people glance our way since I'm the crazy girl who might possibly lose it at any moment. Even the various vendors steal glances at me. From behind the hanging dried fish strips, around glass vases perched on the planks, through the beautiful fabrics. There's a snort of disgust from Yurol. "How do you stand it? All their stares, I should call them out."
"Please don't. Then they'll think I'm the crazy girl with the crazy best friend." I laugh.
Yurol somewhat gapes at me. "Annie! How can you talk like that?"
I just wave my hand dismissively. "They're all thinking it. I don't care. Everyone I love is in my life, I'm happy."
A bit agitatedly, Yurol takes my hand and leads me away. "I want to go somewhere else where people aren't so rude." We're walking past a glass tank filled with beautiful fish and colorful coral, when somebody walks into us. Annoyed, Yurol snaps. "Watch it."
"You watch it." An attractive blonde with bright blue eye spats. Then she looks at me. "Hey, you're Annie. The victor."
I turn to the tank and watch the fish swim. "I am." A blue fish with a black mark encircling a blue circle and a yellow tail, swims along the surface and then down to some white coral. A baby parrotfish is chewing on purple coral causing bits of it to break off and join the sand beneath.
The blonde's faint reflection in the glass begins to speak again. "I feel like I should tell you now since you'll probably hear about it, and I'm sure Finnick will come back for more, but we're kind of together now."
"What?" I hear Yurol scoff in disbelief. Which is a good sign because Yurol hasn't assumed Finnick is a lying cheater.
"Are you a part of this conversation?" The blonde snaps.
"Well I am her sister." Yurol retorts.
I turn around and shake my head. "It's fine Yurol." I give my attention to the blonde. "You were saying."
The blonde clears her throat and tears her hateful glare from Yurol. "All I'm saying is that Finnick was with me the night of Kenin's party, so we're like, together now."
"Did Finnick actually say that?" I ask in an almost bored voice.
"No, but he doesn't have to. I just wanted to extend the common courtesy of letting you know so you don't hear about it from other people." The blonde says as if this is actually what she's trying to do.
"Well thanks so much." I reply with obviously fake sincerity. "But until Finnick actually says that, I can't believe you because he's with me."
A loud smirk is the blonde's response. "Wow, you really are delusional aren't you?"
Before any of us see it coming, Yurol's fist is suddenly plummeting into the blonde's face with an incredibly loud smack! I feel my mouth drop, and the sudden following silence in the area around us just screams. People are gaping, as I am, staring at Yurol in shock. She's always been known to be nice and timid, sometimes a bit too blunt, but pretty much harmless by nature. Not many people have seen how many times she's slapped Finnick, well except when she did it after my return home, but that's besides the point. I think I'm still in shock at what just happened. Basically, this violent nature from Yurol is a shock to everyone.
The blonde is on the ground sobbing and several of her friends come over and crouch down to help her, so we immediately decide this is the time to leave. Peacekeepers tend to not care about what goes on between Four citizens, but we're not about to start a showdown in the middle of the market. I'm in no condition to fight, and Yurol, well, after what happened, I can't speak for her. Anyways, we need to leave.
Yurol and I turn around only to see Finnick staring at Yurol in shock, with an even more surprised Cameron at his side. Now Yurol's mouth drops, and I grab her arm so we can seriously get out of here. We rush past the people staring at us, and push through the crowd with Finnick and Cameron following behind. As we get further away from the scene, the noisier it gets since the people here are unaware of what just happened. We take some turns around stalls selling food, and stop in front of a noodle stall.
I can feel Yurol slightly shaking from the adrenaline which has to be coursing through her veins, and Finnick is the first to speak. "What was that about?"
Yurol gives a nervous laugh. "You're asking us?" She laughs again on the verge of possible hysteria. "You didn't recognize her?"
"No, why would I?" Finnick asks.
"She's the girl you slept with at Kenin's party." I tell him.
"Oh." He softly replies.
Yurol steadies herself on a stall, and breathes in deeply. "Oh is right. That girl was under the impression you two were together."
I suppress a smile as Finnick rolls his eyes and shakes his head. "They always think a one night stand means so much more than just that: a one night stand."
"C'mon forgetful boy, let's get some food and let these two talk." I tell Finnick as I take his hand. "I'll see you later Yurol."
"Yeah." She responds a bit nervously, not quite able to look at Cameron yet. But knowing her, she'll talk with him.
Just in case though, I tell her. "We'll be around here for the next hour or so. If you need us, you'll know where to find us."
Finnick pulls me away before I can say anymore sisterly advice since Cameron does look like he's just waiting for us to make our exit. I smile and press my face to Finnick's arm. He kisses the top of my head and asks. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine. The girl is the one who got punched by Yurol." I say.
"I know, I saw that. What was the girl saying?"
"She said you guys were kind of together, and since I didn't believe her, she questioned if I was delusional." I tell him.
Immediately Finnick stops walking, and I can tell he's pissed. "Then she got what she deserved."
Seriously, I say. "Finnick…"
"I mean it Annie." He replies standing by his statement. "No one has the right to speak to you that way. I'm sick of these girls treating you like you're nothing just because they're mad that I'm with you. I love you, they need to get over it."
I nod my head in exasperation. "And I love you too, but I can handle those girls. They can't ever make me question our relationship. They didn't when I found out before we got back together. I know you Finnick, trust that and ignore everyone else. Okay?"
He lets out a sharp exhale. "Okay. Fine. You're right. We can't listen to what everyone says."
"Correct." I smile. My stomach growls but I can only feel it since the noise from our surroundings drowns out the actual growl. "So I'm still starving, almost literally," I joke and Finnick just smiles at me in disbelief since I said that, "can we please get something to eat?"
"Yes, of course." Finnick replies. He pulls me closer and gently plants a kiss on my lips. "Thank you, for being so understanding about me and my past."
I kiss him back. "And thank you, for being so understanding about the slightly disturbed."
"Always." Finnick quietly assures me.
And while almost nothing is guaranteed, I know Finnick will always mean it.
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yayy! yes, i made them get back together, i mean c'mon, they're in love, they're victors, i didn't have much reason to keep them apart longer. until the 75th games at least
i'll do my best to update soon, thanks again! you guys inspire me to write